The Runaways
by SimplyDazzling
Summary: "What if your actions end up ruining someone's life? How do you pay for what you've done?" Events in the past have caused Edward to be broken. Bringing Bella into his dark life wasn't something he wanted to do, and yet, somehow was unavoidable. A/H
1. Les Fugueurs

**First chapter.  
Do me a favor and show me some love?**

**I'd like that.**

**Feedback would be greatly appreciated, m'dears.**

**This story is rated M due to adult content, dark themes, dark humor, lemons, and a lot of language.**

**All-Human.  
Cannon-Pairings.  
**

**READ SUMMARY BELOW BEFORE BEGINNING THE CHAPTER.  
Trust me.**

**_Events in the past have caused Edward to be broken. Both him and his makeshift family have enough pain to fill an entire lifetime. The call themselves "The Runaways." Whether it's a dark past, family issue, or simply the feeling of loneliness, they are all bonded in unexplainable ways. The only thing no one ever knew was how deep Edward Cullen really was. With secrets so forbidden, so deadly, he had locked himself up and distanced himself from the actual world. Bella's the "it" girl with everything she could ever want and more. She's got a future full of options, and many people that adore and love her. Getting mixed in with the Runaways was something she chose to do, but something she had been warned over and over not to. Brining Bella into his dark life wasn't something he wanted to do, and yet, somehow was unavoidable. As secrets of the past unravel, the killing games began to become more intense – threatening to tear the six of them apart forever.  
_**

**--Justine(:**

**And so the journey begins. . .**

* * *

**Bella - Les Fugueurs**

_Fuck_. Of course the one day I decide it's nice enough to walk home from school, happens to be the one day I get a group of stalkers following me. Since the last two blocks, they had been walking a pretty close distance behind me. Every time I tried speeding up my pace, they would come at me even faster.

I cursed silently to myself, wishing I was in the safe confines of my red Ferrari. I glanced up at the sky. It wasn't even that nice of a day out. _Stupid, stupid, stupid!_ Never again would I ever walk to or from school. Never.

I continued walking, keeping my eyes on the alley ahead. Wait. Why the fuck was I in an alley? Great place to go when you've got people following you, really, Bella. My common sense was becoming pathetically weak. I figured keeping a good walking pace would be best; My dad taught me all about what to do in a situation like this. You struggle, they kill. Going on the act of keeping my life, I decided to walk. Of course, that'd probably end up being a mistake. Luck was most definitely not on my side today.

These guys were getting closer and closer. I glanced over my shoulder, counting four of them. I groaned quietly to myself. _Wonderful_. I think they were getting tired of following me, and just wanted to get the damn thing over with already. Here was the problem: I wasn't really okay with the idea of being raped. In fact, I hated it. Who wouldn't?

Suddenly, I had the courage to turn around and tell them off. Stupid or not, I should always have the right to speak my mind. You know what, fuck it. That's what I was going to do. "Stay the fuck away from me," I spun around, glaring at all of them. Never show weakness, I reminded myself. "Don't you dare lay a hand on me, I swear." I just noticed now that I was shaking. _Shit_.

They were very drunk, and the only response I got back was a bunch of mumbling and crap. Just because they were drunk, didn't mean they weren't dangerous, I reminded myself in the back of my mind. My channel heels suddenly weren't as appealing as they had been in the store window. Even if I wanted to, I knew I couldn't run with those suckers on. I sighed. This just wasn't my day.

They didn't stop, continuing to approach me. I took a deep breath. "You don't want to touch me," I told them sternly, "My dad's the head of security for the state," I warned, somehow keeping my voice steady. I wasn't lying either. He'd have these guys' balls once they were done with me. A shiver suddenly ran up my spine.

I was backing up into the wall of an old, abandoned shop. They were getting closer. I could almost smell the alcohol poisoning on their tongues. _Fucking disgusting_. That stuff was horrible, and I never understood why people even became so addicted to it in the first place. They inched closer. I wasn't feeling so brave anymore.

Suddenly, the door to the old shop swung open, and I heard a girl's anxious voice. "Hurry, come inside, quick!" She instructed. I didn't even think twice about it. I leaped towards that door, throwing myself inside. The girl who had yelled to me before, caught me before I could fall to the ground. _Damn heels_.

I glanced up at her face, realizing that she was probably around the same age as me. She was a small, pixie-like girl, with short spiky hair. Her eyes sparkled with curiosity, as she held out her hand. "I'm Alice Cullen," She grinned, "Close call out there, huh?" Her voice was relieved. Why? I couldn't imagine. I mean, why would it have mattered to her if anything had happened to me? Not that I didn't appreciate her saving me, and all.

She reached behind me, locking the door as the sounds of men's voices echoed through the alley way. I realized that I hadn't introduced myself yet. _Really nice, Bella_. I cleared my throat, sending her a warm smile. "I'm Bella Swan," I told her without skipping a beat. For some reason, I liked this Alice girl already.

My eyes wondered around the room, revealing that we weren't alone. Four other faces were staring at me, some friendly, some intimidating. I didn't know what to say. I was suddenly afraid that I had been intruding something important. They didn't look like they were up to much, so I relaxed momentarily.

"You guys," Alice announced happily, breaking the silence, "This is Bella."

They all stared at me. I glanced at the room around me. What had used to be an old convenient store, was now a completely lounge area. Sure, it was a little shabby, but for some reason, being inside, I felt comfort. There were two large couches, a small TV, some chairs, and even a futon. The look each had on there face was similar; _What the hell? Who are you? _I almost grinned.

Once again, Alice the life savior broke the silence. I was beginning to like her more and more. "Bella, this is Jasper Whitlock," I guess it was time for introductions. She pointed towards the tall boy, sitting on his couch and working on his laptop. He had light brown hair, messy, yet neat. He was smiling at me, confused, but friendly. I smiled back, waving at him.

She moved on to the beautiful blonde girl, sitting in front of the TV, looking incredibly bored. "This is Rosalie Hale," At the mention of her name, her eyes snapped up and met mine. Her glare made me cringe, causing me to instantly look away. I didn't wave, though I tried to smile. It was hard, the way she was looking at me, skeptically and judgmentally. I prayed that Alice would move onto the next person fast. She rolled her eyes and whispered into my ear, "She doesn't really care for anyone but us," She assured me, "Don't worry, it's not you." Oddly enough, I was slightly relieved.

Next, she moved to the big boy sitting on the recliner, grinning at me. I liked him already. "That's Emmett McCarty," She told me. Happily, I grinned and waved at him. I didn't let his size fool me, though it was frightening. It sort of seemed like he was just a big old teddy bear to me. I don't know, it just felt that way. My mother always told me I was good at figuring people out from first glance.

"Hey, Bella!" Emmett grinned at me, waving back. Alice rolled her eyes smiling.

Last but not least, she pointed to the quiet boy, sitting in the chair in the corner. He was staring at me intently, not glaring, but not exactly looking pleased. It was a start, I guess. "And that is Edward Cullen," She said, exchanging a meaningful glance with him. I stared at him, just now noticing the beauty his face held. It was sort of memorizing. His eyes, piercing green eyes. His hair, a bronze array of perfection. He had a certain edge to him though, and very cautiously, I sent him a small smile.

He gave me a little half-but-not-really smile, still looking at me like I had some unmet expectation to meet. Out of everyone, his reaction confused me the most. I didn't get the way he was so isolated from the rest of them. The way his eyes were closed off and shielded. That was beyond the point though, and I knew I was getting ahead of myself.

"No offense, really," Emmett assured me, still grinning, "But why are you here?" I didn't take that question offensively. It was perfectly fair for him to ask that. At least he was still being friendly.

Alice stepped in before I had the chance to say anything. Bless her heart. "Well, Bella here," She smiled at me, "Was basically just about to get raped." The only one looking surprised was Alice herself. It's not like this town didn't have a large population of fuck-ups. "I saved her." She stated proudly.

"Coolness," He said to the both of us. He was weird, but I liked him already too. Sort of like a big brother type, it appeared. "Well, Bella," He began, "I am glad that we can so graciously host you in your time of need."

Jasper looked up from his laptop and rolled his eyes. He sent me an apologetic glance. "Yeah," He sighed sadly, "He's always like this." And then, I had to laugh. Both buys laughed along with me. Hey, maybe this wasn't so bad after all.

I had some questions to ask, but I didn't know how to ask them without sounding like a fucking creeper. Which is exactly what I probably was. My father would be frowning on my behavior right now. I stood there, not knowing where to go from there. Nervously, I glanced at the door. I wondered if the men were gone.

For some reason, some odd part of me hoped they weren't. I wanted to stay here, and figure these guys out. Their reactions had me curious. Who were they? I had never seen them at school, or around the town. But, then again, Chicago was incredibly populated.

"So. . ." I looked down at me feet, trying to phrase my question the best I could without sounding rude. "Who are you guys?" No one answered for a moment, and then, a voice I wasn't expecting to hear answered me.

"Les Fugueurs." Edward stated quietly and simply, staring directly into my eyes for a moment. His velvet voice sounding incredibly sexy as French words filled his mouth. Wait. I couldn't speak French. For all I knew, he could have been telling me to go and fuck myself.

Alice laughed at my confused expression, explaining for me. "The Runaways," She told me, sounding completely at ease. "That's what we call ourselves."

I noticed Rosalie become completely uneasy, and angry, at the fact that this Alice girl was telling me information that was clearly private to the five of them. I tried my best to ignore her though, focusing on the conversation I was having with Alice.

"Wait, so you guys like, _ran away_?" I asked, completely confused. I guess it made sense. Once again, I was getting ahead of myself though. I decided that keeping my mouth shut unless necessary would be the best option from now on.

"Not exactly," Alice began. She gestured towards the space on the couch, urging me to sit down. I sat a careful distance from Jasper, as Alice slid comfortably in the middle of us. She smiled at him with glowing affection, then turned back to me. "We call ourselves that, because we run away from our problems. Or, something like that I guess," She laughed quietly to herself. I still didn't understand.

"You see," She explained, "Each of us has our own set of problems." She paused, and I knew she was debating on whether or not she should even be telling me any of this in the first place. If I was her, _I _wouldn't be. I mean, they had no idea who I was. I had no idea who _they_ were. This situation was getting weirder by the second. "Like me, for example."

Her expression wavered for a moment, becoming slightly sad. I frowned, not knowing if this was a story I wanted to hear. Suddenly, I felt very out of place. Here was this group of kids, ones who were probably very close and all, and then there was me. To them, I was probably just some crazy bitch. I asked myself silently why I was here. Maybe there was a reason. Everything happens for a reason. I had to convince myself that, at least.

Alice brought me back to focus, beginning her story. "From the moment I was born," She explained, "My parents couldn't afford me. They couldn't afford a child." Her eyes met mine. They were calm, but I could see the slight hurt in them. "You see, I was sort of an accident." She laughed quietly to herself, though I didn't know what at. "Anyways. They gave me away to the state, putting me in an orphanage."

I didn't know this girl, and yet here I was, feeling sorry for her. It was sort of hard _not_ to like Alice though. I continued to listen contently, still feeling awkward being there. I played with my hands, fidgeted with my feet. Nothing felt comfortable.

"So the story's pretty self-explanatory from there," She sighed. "In Chicago alone, I've been through so many different adopted families, I can't even remember anymore." I wanted to ask her why she had been through so many, why all of her adopted parents hadn't kept her. She saw the question in my eyes, and answered it before I had to ask.

"I'm naturally an unlucky person," She pouted, her lip sticking out and everything. I grinned at her, easing the tension. She smiled back. "I guess none of them really worked. Either for me, or for them." Then, I felt sad for her again. "The older you get, the less of a chance you get to be adopted. I've been with the same orphanage now for two years."

"I'm sorry," I responded automatically, really meaning that. I couldn't imagine never having a mom and dad, or even someone to be there for me. She shook her head assuringly and smiled at me.

"Don't be. I spend most of my time with these guys anyways, _my real family_," She took her time, beaming at each one of them. "Besides, in a few months, I'll be 18, and won't have to worry about any legal crap anymore." She finished happily, smiling at me.

I knew the men were probably gone, but for some reason, I wanted to stay. Alice's earlier words had be completely curious. I wanted to know what the rest of their stories were, more about them, but I didn't want to pry. It wasn't fair to them. I tried to keep the frown off my face, but she noticed. In a low whisper she leaned towards my face, "Look, they'll tell you theirs in time. I would, but they're not my stories to tell." I nodded in understandment, sending her a grateful smile.

Then, the awkward silence came back. No one seemed to want to say anything. I darted my eyes around the room nervously, wondering what my next words would be. Rosalie quietly snorted at me from her chair. I tried to ignore her. Well excuse me for trying to make new friends, bitch.

My voice remained steady though, as I decided telling them about myself would be best. Who knew. Maybe if I told them about me, they'd tell me about them. "I go to school at Tech High, what about you guys?" I hoped I wasn't crossing any lines. It seemed like a friendly enough question to ask, I thought.

It didn't surprise me that it was Alice who was the first to answer. "I go to North View," She told me. Oh, that explains it. It was a small, private school on the edge of town. I don't think I knew anyone who went there. "I'm graduating this year, because I skipped sixth grade," She beamed proudly at me.

"Rub it in a little more why don't you, shorty?" I heard Emmett mutter under his breath. I held in another giggle, trying not to offend anyone here. I didn't want them to hate me. For some reason, I wanted them to like me. Alice heard, and stuck her tongue out at him.

"You see, young Bella," He began. Good lord. I smirked at him as he continued on, "I didn't have the opportunity to finish all of my academic curriculum. School became less of a priority, and more of a hassle. I'm nineteen. I dropped out two years ago." I instantly wonder what he _did _consider a priority then. Emmett _seemed_ smart. I wondered what had urged him to drop out. Again, I kept my mouth shut, not wanting to pry.

"I got to North View, as well, Bella," Jasper told me. It was the first time I had heard him speak, and I about died. His accent held a very southern draw, almost making me giggle. It was damn cute. I wondered if he was from the South.

I nodded at him, grinning. "Where are you from, Jasper?" I asked, knowing that he wouldn't get offended by my questioning. He was sort of a sweetheart, I could tell. There was something about him that was very honest. His eyes and face looked like more of small boy, rather than a grown teenager. And again, I had to smile at him.

"I'm from the South," He responded, confirming my suspicions.

Neither Edward nor Blondie seemed like they wanted to say anything, or talk to me for that matter, so I stuck with these three. Although, I couldn't help but continue to glance at Edward from across the room. He had a notebook, and was writing in it. Sometimes, when I'd look at him, he'd look back. Like he knew that that's where my eyes were. I'd always blush and look away quickly whenever he caught me, feeling really stupid.

The three of us talked for a little while, about small, unimportant things. The whole time, the whole conversation, I was always fighting the urge to ask more. Not that I didn't enjoy the nice small talk we were having; The curiosity was just eating me alive. _Fuck off, curiosity_, I instructed myself, _Normality is here_.

After more time went by, Emmett sigh and stood up. "Well, I better go and check on the mother," Emmett told us, walking to the door. I glanced at the clock, and out the window. I hadn't even noticed I'd been staying that late. Shit. Well, guess I should say my goodbyes then as well.

Rosalie stood up from her chair – the first I had seen her move – and walked over to Emmett. She surprised me by embracing him in a tight, caring hug. Huh, I guess Blondie did have a heart. When they pulled away from each other, I noticed the same emotion showing on both of their faces. _Pain_. At least, I think that's what it was. Weird.

I guess Rosalie was leaving too, because she slipped on a pair of shoes, and walked out the door before him. Before she left, I heard him whisper very quietly, "Be careful, Rosie." I wished I hadn't heard that. It really wasn't helping my curiosity level go down at all.

Emmett opened the door and step outside, and turned back to me. He called over his shoulder, "Where's your set of wheels?" He asked me curiously.

Without thinking, I called back, "The Ferrari's at home." Shit, shit, shit. I had been doing so well _not_ sounding like a superficial bitch. Before I could worry about their might-be skeptical opinions, Emmett broke the silence.

"Well, well, well." He cackled, sounding impressed and letting out a low whistle. "New Meat's got a Ferrari. Wouldn't have guessed _that_." I rolled my eyes and giggled quietly as he walked out the door.

Jasper stood up as well. "Well, Al," He turned to Alice, holding out his hand. "It's a perfect night, what do you say to getting out of here?" She laughed, looking delighted. The sparkle in each of their eyes as they looked at one another clearly showed love. I kind of envied them. Of all the boyfriends I had had, _none_ of them looked at me like that.

He helped her up off the couch, and she paused, turning to look at me with hesitance. "Is that okay, Bella?" She titled her head to the side, questioning me. "If we leave, I mean."

I gave her a confused look. Why wouldn't it be okay? It's not like she had to stay here and keep me company. It was probably time I left too anyways. "Yeah, go ahead." I assured her quickly, smiling.

"Okay," She grinned, pulling me into a friendly hug. "It was really nice meeting you, by the way. I hope we see you again soon." Her eyes were hopeful. I knew I'd be back. For some reason, this place intrigued me. I had seen too much city life lately, apparently.

"You can count on that," I assured her, sounding enthused. "Oh, and thanks again for, you know, saving me." I couldn't help but laugh a little, and so did she. What a ridiculous way to meet someone new.

"You staying here tonight, Ed?" Jasper asked him. His eyes shot up from his notebook and he nodded. "Alright, remember to lock the door," He joked. Edward rolled his eyes. "I'll be here later tomorrow afternoon." Then, they left.

It was just Edward and I now. I should have left, that would have been a good idea, but my feet just wouldn't carry me anywhere. I felt oddly obliged to find out more about this boy. Why was he so quiet? His green eyes rose from his papers once again, catching me looking at him. God, I had to stop doing that. _Leave now, Bella,_ I thought angrily, _You're only embarrassing yourself_.

"What are you doing?" I suddenly blurted out, not being able to help myself.

He stared at me for a few moments in silence. It seemed like he was debating with himself whether or not he should answer me. I walked over to the side of the couch, closest to the chair he was sitting on. I think I was really pissing him off, though I couldn't tell. Maybe he was just naturally an irritated person. Maybe it was PMS. It took everything in me to hold back a loud chuckle.

It was more than that though. His stare, as I had noticed before, was deeper than it appeared. It's like he was closing himself off, hiding all of the emotions he didn't want others to see. I mentally gave myself a high five. I was being pretty fucking perceptive today, and I liked it.

"Just writing," He finally answered, dropping his eyes back to whatever the hell it was that he was writing. This boy really didn't like to talk, did he? Well, I wasn't leaving until I finally got something decent out of his mouth. Anything.

"Oh." I answered flatly. "Cool." The disappointment in my voice was strong; I could hear it, and knew he could too. I was really starting to worry that I was making him angry. God knows what kind of 'problems' he had that Alice was referring to. Who knew. Maybe it was an incident with some crazy bitch girlfriend in the past. Ah-hah. That was definitely it. That was definitely the reason he wasn't talking to me.

I was starting to confuse myself.

"So. . ." I started lamely, hoping that he could be the one providing the conversation. He sighed loudly, setting his pen down and closing his notebook. I grimaced a little at his annoyed face.

"You just love to talk, don't you?" He asked me, running a hand through his messy hair. I wanted to touch that hair. I bet it felt as amazing as it looked. I didn't even think that was possible though, because it _looked_ fucking fantastic. I had to stop ogling poor Edward before I got carried away.

"I'm sorry," I bit my lip and looked down.

"Don't worry about it," He sighed again, sounding more. . .relaxed? I hoped so. We both just kind of sat there, and I decided that unless one of us said something soon, this was a potential for the awkwardest moments of my life.

All of a sudden, I remembered something. "You sleep here?" I asked, not helping myself but to sound amazed. I mean, don't get me wrong, it seemed like a great place, I was just confused. What about his home? His parents?

Something flashed in his eyes for a moment after I asked him this. It seemed like remorse, but I couldn't tell. Once again, he was closing himself off. I wished he wouldn't do that. I was trying really hard to figure him out, whether he liked it or not.

"Yeah," He answered grimly, "I live here most of the time too." He seemed uncomfortable with where this conversation was going. "I stay at the guys' places sometimes, but mostly I like it here. It's quiet." And there I was, thinking I would never get something decent from his mouth. He hadn't realized it, but he had just given me way more information than I had been expecting to get in the first place.

If he lived here, I was going on the assumption that his parents were either dead, or he didn't like them very much. I hoped it was the second one. Just like Alice, no one deserved to not have parents, no matter who you were. This was way too deep of a subject to get into after just meeting though, so I decided not to ask much more of him.

"So you own a Ferrari, huh?" He asked, a small smile filtering across his lips. Wow. I got a smile out of him. Wasn't expecting that either. I knew that with this question, he was asking others as well. Once again, I tried my hardest not to sound like a superficial bitch. Deep down, I really wasn't one.

I gave him a small smile. "My dad's head of security for the state," I told him. "He gives all of his money to my mom and I, because he never uses it." I rolled my eyes. "They gave it to me for my sixteenth birthday. Though I'd never pick that as my first car."

He raised an eyebrow. "Why? It's a great car." He said it matter-of-factly, like I didn't already know that.

"You don't know me," I grimaced at him, "I'm a magnet for danger. Where I go, accidents follow. I mean, I'm surprised I've made it through a whole year with only a few scratches on it." I didn't know why I was telling him all of this. I was probably putting him to sleep.

I chanced a glance at his face, peeking up at him through my eyelashes. He was smirking, trying really hard not to laugh. I narrowed my eyes at him. "Don't laugh." I warned him sternly. He was shaking with silent laughter, trying to hide it from me.

I turned around completely so I was no longer facing him, crossing my arms and sticking my chin up in the air. "Bella, I'm sorry." I heard him chuckle, "I'm normally not an ass, I swear." Then, he began laughing again. "You just amuse me." I amuse you? Wonderful. I've known you for what, an hour? Two?

"Gee, Edward," I replied with heavy sarcasm in my voice, "You really do know a good apology." I also added, "Glad my unfortunate luck amuses you." He really had to stop laughing soon. Now _I _was the one getting pissed.

Actually, I was okay that he was laughing, despite the reason. I had this feeling that he really didn't laugh all that often. Somehow, I knew that this wasn't usual to him. I turned back around, suddenly finding him much closer than he was before.

"Sorry," His hot breath blew into my face. "Really, I am. I shouldn't have laughed at you like that." All I could do was gulp and nod, not being able to form a single coherent thought. Damn mind-processing.

"It's o-okay," I stuttered, blinking my vision back into focus, onto his eyes. Before even thinking about it, I blurted the first thing on my mind. "You have the prettiest eyes." Yeah, it was true. Did I want to admit it to him out loud? No. Looks like I had no choice _now_.

He furrowed his brows together. "Thanks?" He asked, looking at me like he was questioning my sanity. Awesome. He probably thought I was a pothead or on weed or some shit like that. Apparently, you couldn't give a compliment in the twenty-first century without being judged. I decided that as long as I was confessing, I might as well do it thoroughly.

"No really," I told him, fighting back the strong urge to touch his face. Just like his hair, I bet it felt amazing. "They're green. _Really_ green. Did you know that's my favorite color?" _What the hell are you doing, Bella_? And no, green was not my favorite color. Maybe it was now though.

I was both surprised and relieved when he laughed quietly. He backed away from me, which was probably a good thing for my self-control, and sat back down in his chair. He picked up his notebook again, and began writing. I wasn't sure if this was my dismissal or not, so I just sat there.

"You know what, Bella Swan?" He asked, glancing up through his long lashes. I swear, my heart just skipped a beat. _Stop that_, I wanted to shout at him. He was doing it on purpose. "You're okay." He told me simply. His tone made it clear that he was not making fun of me.

I took _that_ as my dismissal, deciding it was getting late anyways. There were so many more things I wanted to ask; so much I wanted to find out. I reminded myself that I'd most likely be back tomorrow. The thought made me smile.

I stood up, smiling genuinely at him. "Thanks," I said happily, making my way to the door. My house was only a little over a mile away – I knew I'd make it home before dark. _Hopefully_. I glanced down at my feet, silently cursing out my heels once again.

My hand turned the doorknob, ready to swing the door open when I heard Edward. "Bella?" He called quietly. I spun quickly around to face him. "For the record," He smiled at me, "You have pretty eyes too."

In that moment, I felt _exactly_ like a thirteen year-old girl again. One who hadn't dumped her boyfriend a week ago; one who's heart skipped a beat whenever she saw a cute guy smile at her; one who still squealed like a fan girl when she saw her favorite actor on screen. I liked the feeling – I hadn't felt it in a long time. I held it in though, keeping my expression reasonable while I nodded goodbye.

I pushed open the door and was met by a cool, mid-April breeze. I smiled into the air, walking out of the small alley, onto a sidewalk, and towards my home.

Due to my content mood, and determination not to get stalked for a second time that night, I made it home in a little less than twenty minutes. I was eager to talk to my mom; She was _never _home. Always traveling to exotic places. I knew for sure that Charlie wouldn't be home – He was always working. I still loved him the same though.

I went through our large front doors, greeted by Laurent as I entered. He was our chef, and family friend. He was more of an uncle to me than anything. I smiled widely at him, heading straight towards the dining room. I hadn't realized it before, but I was pretty damn hungry.

I walked into the spacious room, stopping in the doorway when I realized that it was empty. My face fell slightly. I heard Laurent approach me, and turned to meet his grim face. I already knew what was coming. He handed me a neat, folded note. "Your mother wanted me to give you this."

I quickly unfolded it, already braced for what her words would be. In my mother's messy hand-writing, it read – _**Bella, Sorry I couldn't make it home tonight. Shelly had a last minute decision to fly to Maui for a few days. You know how much I love Hawaii. I'll be home by Friday; Stay out of trouble and say hi to Jake for me. Lots of love, Renee.**_

I sat down at the table by myself, letting the disappointment wash over me. She was always gone. All of the time. She hadn't even been home long enough for me to tell her that I had broken up with Jake a week ago. She would be sad; She had liked Jacob.

This wasn't anything knew though. There were always "last minute trips" or "sudden opportunities" that she needed to take. When she had made the decision to become a traveler, she knew that it would mean less family time. It was her choice though, and her life. I couldn't be bitter about it for too long. After all, she took me with her sometimes. It was with Shelly though, most of the time. Her only sister, my only aunt.

I had almost forgotten that I wasn't alone. I heard Laurent clear his throat. "What would you like for dinner tonight, Miss Bella?" He asked in a kind tone.

I gave him a small smile. "Nothing tonight," I told him, hiding the sadness in my tone. I'd rather not eat at all than eat alone. "I'm not that hungry tonight." Without another word, I got up and headed for my bedroom.

I walked over to my phone, and checked my messages. It flashed that I had three new ones. I pressed playing, listening to the first. "Bella! Where are you? We were suppose to meet at the mall, remember? Get your ass over here! Love ya bitch, bye." Jess's loud voice screamed at me. I sighed, already being able to guess who the next two were from.

I didn't really feel sorry though. Lately, she had been getting on my nerves. She was my best friend, but I knew we were starting to fade. I felt a little bad for not meeting her there though, and having our plans completely slip my memory. I decided not to call her, knowing she probably found some guy to make-out with instead.

The next message began to play, and after only hearing the first syllable, I groaned loudly to myself. "Hey baby, we need to talk. I miss you a lot, and want you–" I stopped the message before listening to anymore of it. Jacob could just sit and rot for all I cared. I didn't want him back. I never _would_. What was the point in calling and telling him that? He was a shallow bastard. Simple as that.

I went on to the final message. "Hi Sweetie, it's your mom. In case Laurent didn't give you my note, I'll be gone until Friday. I miss you! I love you!" My mother was far too enthusiastic for her own good. She often told me I was young and naïve, and that I'd make many mistakes in life, but I always knew it was the other way around.

After a long shower, shaved legs, and nice-smelling lotion later, I sat in the middle of my bed. I knew it'd be a few hours before my dad got home, and that there was no point in waiting up for him. He'd just crash as soon as he got home anyways. I heard the quiet vacuuming downstairs as Emily cleaned our house. I wondered why we had a maid. I was home so often, it would be stupid _not_ for me to clean.

Deciding to turn in early, I pulled back the covers and crawled snuggly under them, cozying up to my pillow. I million thoughts ran through my mind as I shut my eyes. Alleys, dark men, pixie-like girls, teddy-bear boys, green eyes. . .My dreams would be vivid tonight, _that_ was for sure.

"Les Fugueurs," I whispered silently to myself, remembering their words. _The Runaways_.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Go – Boys Like Girls

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Les Fugueurs – _"The Runaways"

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_**Reviews are better than having Jacob Black as your stalking ex.**_


	2. Je Suis Désolé

**Bah, I'm back!  
Miss me?  
Yeah, I know.**

**Thanks a million for the response to the first chapter!  
I really appreciated all of your thoughts and comments – like seriously? I live from your support. So as always: THANKS A FLIPPIN' MILLION(:**

**Alright, so guys, you're going to have to bear with me on the first few chapters.  
They will be a tad bit confusing, but that's because I planned 'em that way. Like, you** _**will**_** find out all of your questions and answers eventually, okay?  
Oh, and I WILL respond to all of your reviews this time. I promise. Life's finally settling down and giving me enough time to do that now! :D**

**Much love, dears.**

**--Justine(:**

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**Bella - ****Je Suis Désolé**

There was a loud pounding on my door, and I groaned loudly into my pillow, desperately trying to ignore it. After a minute of constant loudness, I figured the noise wouldn't go away until I responded. Sitting up in my bed, rubbing my hands over my eyes, I angrily called to my visitor on the other side. "What?" I asked loudly, my voice seeping with irritation.

"It's me," Jessica sang back from the other side, "Now let me in before I bust the shit out of your door!" I almost smiled to myself. Almost. The thought of Jess trying to break down a door on her own was quite amusing. Irritation came back though, and I sank back down into my sheets, wanting to sleep more. What time was it, anyways?

"What the hell do you want?" I asked, snuggling back into my pillow. My voice was ful of sleepy irritation. She of all people was the one who knew I wasn't a morning person. I most certainly was _not_ a morning person.

Figures, Jessica wasn't a patient person, so I knew I only had about ten seconds before she tried picking the lock and entering my room. I sat up once again, reaching for the blinds. I cracked them open, and the bright sun shown through my room. I liked the sun. You didn't see much of it here because of all the dumb smog.

Trying to become more awake, I rubbed my eyes some more. I counted to ten in my head, smiling smugly when she entered the room not a second later. I wasn't ready to hear her trilling voice just yet, and I wondered if I could put that in a nice way. _Um, yeah, your voice annoys the shit out of me_._ Leave now_. I'm sure that'd be a great way to keep my friend. Definitely.

Trying to sound more pleasant than before as she sat down comfortably at the edge of my bed, I yawned. "What do you want, Jess?" Trying to muster a friendly smile did not work out to my advantage. She kind of just grimaced at me, shaking her head and mumbling something about needing to get more sleep.

She ignored my annoyed expression, and jumped into a long conversation I didn't want to began in the first place. "I was thinking, after school, we should go check out the guys at mall. Then, maybe we could go tanning, you're seriously in need of–" I held up my hand, cutting her off. Had she really always been this shallow? I wondered how I'd never noticed it.

"Weren't you just _at_ the mall?" I asked, staring at her in confusion. What was with her and the mall. I swore to God, that's where she lived. It wasn't that I was against shopping or anything, it was just Jessica's _idea_ of shopping. It'd make a difference in my opinion if she actually _shopped_ from time to time. "And I don't want to tan," I told her, coming out sharper than intended. "It's instant skin cancer."

I was making excuses, avoiding actually telling her that I had already made plans. Well, not technically. I really wanted to go back there. Back to Alice, Emmett, Edward, and the rest of them. There was something about them that compelled me to go back. I had no clue _what_ it was; I knew it was just there. I wanted to go back there for a reason, I told myself. There had to be a reason.

Hell, I didn't even know what I was talking about anymore.

"We can go to the movies," She edged eagerly, "I mean, I heard that Lauren's group was going to go, and I say we surprise them by going." I hated the fact that everyone thought of me so highly. In my school, there were groups. I had never had any control over where I ended up, but somehow, I was the most respected girl at the damn school. It was weird always to have everyone constantly expecting things from you.

Like I was always expected to be the one to throw the huge, wild parties. The one who would date all of the sport's captains, and act like I had the personality of a Barbie doll. I was always suppose to have the latest fashion lines, and the most expensive make-up.

I always let them think what they wanted though, knowing it was better to be liked and respected than hated and unwelcome. At least, that's what it seemed like.

"Jake's going to be there," She said excitedly, clapping her hands together. Her statement instantly pulled me from my thoughts, bringing me back into the conversation. "He keeps telling everyone you guys are back together, even though you're not. Why did you break up with him again? . . ." And this was why I rarely told anything personal to her. She had the attention span of a cheese stick. A fucking stupid cheese stick. Her eyes were focused intently on the shirtless male jogging outside the window on the sidewalk.

Taking this as a way to escape the conversation, I got out of my bed and walked over to my closet. I guess it wouldn't hurt me to arrive to school early for once. I stepped into my walk-in closet, searching for something suitable to wear along with the nice weather. "Look, Jess," I tried to make my tone sound remorseful. "I can't do anything today. . ." Shit, _now_ what was I suppose to tell her? "My cousins from out of town are coming." I lied smoothly, deciding she wouldn't question me any further.

"Oh," She sounded disappointed for only a moment before she became distracted again, "Are they the hot ones? You know, Sam and Paul?" She really did have a one-tracked mind, didn't she? I sighed, shaking my head, not even bothering to answer her question.

School was a complete drag. Normally, I could at least find some way to entertain myself, but not today. The clock moved at an unbearable rate as I spent a constant part of the day staring at it.

Jessica would always be at my side, babbling on about nothing. Jacob would always be following me, and I'd always be avoiding him. The bastard really couldn't take a hint, could he? I was starting to wonder if asking my dad about a restraining order would be a good idea or not. I knew it was to the extremes, but honestly, I would be okay if I never had to be within a hundred feet of Jake again. Maybe once I wouldn't have been okay with it, but that was the past.

Finally, the end of the day bell rang. I was about ready to stand on my desk and sing a fucking song when it happened. It had been, by far, the longest school day ever. I wasn't sure why though; Nothing had changed.

Mike Newton and the rest of the baseball team blew me theatrical kisses as I drove out of the parking lot. I rolled my eyes, shaking my head. I had always liked the guys on the baseball team. Most of them never tried anything with me, and were actually nice guys. Mike especially – he was definitely one of my better guy friends.

I parade-waved back at them, holding my arm out the window, giggling quietly to myself. I was beyond relieved that I had my car with me today. No rapists, no walking for miles in heels. I easily pushed over the speed limit, enjoying the thrill and adrenaline of going fast. Charlie would disapprove, but I knew that secretly, he liked the speed too.

Remembering the roads and streets I had taken yesterday, I followed them carefully to lead me exactly to where I wanted to go. I pulled into the alley, carefully avoiding scrapes and scratches from the narrow walls. Why was I so damn excited? I knew my iced coffee wasn't making matters any better.

I parked tightly against the wall, a couple of feet from their door. I was really hoping no one would have to use this alley for transportation, because two cars most certainly could _not_ fit. I shut off the ignition, stepping out of the car and locking the doors.

Straightening out my shirt and adjusting my pants, I took a deep breath and hesitantly knocked twice on the old, wooden door. Who knew; maybe they wouldn't even want to see me at all. I heard movement on the other side, and muffled voices.

It was completely unexpected when Rosalie opened the door, her face changing to mild irritation as soon as she saw it was me. "Oh," She sighed, walking away and leaving the door open behind her. "It's you." Okay, so I was going to need to work on the friendship thing with her, but I knew that being persistent enough, I could most likely do it.

Smiling and taking in her _I don't give a fuck_ attitude, I stepped inside, shutting the door behind me. Glancing around the room, I spotted Edward, spread out lazily across the futon, Jasper flipping through channels, and Rosalie, who was, well. . .I wasn't really sure, actually.

Jasper looked up at me. "It's the newbie," He grinned, smirking at me. "Welcome back, Bella." I wondered why he had called me that. _The newbie_. Emmett had said something similar yesterday as well. I pushed the questioning thoughts away though, and sent him a warm smile.

"Hey, Jasper," I grinned back at him.

I decided to shoot Edward a smile as well, going on the assumption that he didn't hate me. I mean, he had even said so yesterday. When his pretty green eyes met mine, I was suddenly taken aback by the hostility in them. I cringed, quickly looking away.

What the fuck just happened? Had he just glared at me for no absolute reason? I was immediately afraid that I had said or did something wrong after all. Oh, shit.

Rosalie obviously wasn't going to be a good person to start a conversation with, so I moved on to Jasper. He seemed happy to oblige. I sat down next to him, a few feet away on the couch. I never chanced a glance in Edward's direction once I was seated.

Using the perfect opportunity for questions, curiously, I asked him, "Where are Alice and Emmett?"

Hesitation flashed in his friendly eyes, but that quickly passed as he smiled assuringly at me. "Well," He explained, "I believe Alice should be arriving here shortly – I think she's still shopping, but I'm not positive." An idea popped into my brain. _Shopping_. Maybe I would no longer need to endure endless hours at the mall with Jess. Maybe I had just found myself a brand new gal-pal. I cringed, not wanting to ever say _or_ think the words 'gal-pal' again. Ever.

I waited for him to tell me where Emmett was. Once again, the same hesitation flashed in his eyes. It was like he was debating on whether or not it was information available for me to hear. Either way, I was fine with it. I wasn't going to push for things I didn't deserve. I sent him a assuring smile, letting him know that he didn't need to tell me.

Turns out, he wanted to. "He's at an alcoholic meeting with his mom," Jasper suddenly told me, sounding remorseful. Wait, Emmett was an alcoholic? Well, that was kind of depressing. He sort of seemed like a good guy. Jasper probably read what I was thinking on my face, and went on to explain. "Emmett doesn't drink, his mother does. He goes along with her to be supportive." What about his dad? He read that question in my face as well. "Em's dad died when he was four."

I felt a surge of sadness wash over me. So that was what Emmett's problem was. I couldn't imagine how hard it was for him; Having to take constant care of his mother, keeping her away from the addicting poison. I reminded myself that the next time I saw him, I'd give him a huge hug. I guessed everyone here probably needed a huge hug though, actually.

Maybe when the mood lightened up a bit, I'd start the hugs. Now _clearly_ wasn't the time. And, due to recent observations, I _really_ doubted that these were the 'hugging' type of people.

"Oh." I answered quietly, "That's so sad." Jasper nodded in response. I glanced at Rosalie, and then realized something. Whispering so she wouldn't hear I was talking about her, I asked him, "Are Rosalie and Emmett. . .together?" Jasper glanced at Rosalie as well, and made a face.

"It's complicated," He responded in a low tone, too quiet for her to hear.

They had hugged yesterday, exchanging meaningful glances, so I understood a little of what he was talking about. There was more than that though – it wasn't just the 'we have a thing' bullshit. There was much more, and the fact that he was hiding it was obvious in his eyes.

I waited for the awkwardness to come, but it never appeared. As the minutes went by, I was feeling more and more at ease. At least, I was until I chanced another glance at Edward. He was glaring at me. _Still_. My eyes quickly flashed back to the old comedy sitcom Jasper and I had been watching.

It wasn't fair; Why was he being so mean? Yesterday, I had thought differently of him. Now, I was just plain insulted that he would hate me for no damn reason.

Or maybe there was a reason. Which, quickly brought my thoughts back to wondering what could possibly be wrong with him. There were about a thousands scenarios, each with their own twisted stories. I really wanted to know his. Even if he _did_ hate me for some reason, I still wanted to know.

We continued to watch TV for a while, and I noticed that Rosalie and Edward had also began watching as well. I was on one side of the couch; Jasper on the other.

Suddenly, there was a slight change in his breathing. It became heavy, and labored. Edward immediately stood up, slowly approaching Jasper. I didn't understand what was going on.

Jasper stood up as well, and Rosalie stared at the two of them cautiously. Whatever was happening, wasn't new to her though. Edward was only a few steps in front of him, holding his hands out before him. I watched, completely confused. Their actions told me that something was wrong.

"Jasper," Edward said loudly, his voice stern. "Dude, stay with me." I didn't know _what the hell_ he was talking about, but suddenly, he grabbed onto my arm, pulling me swiftly off the couch and standing me directly behind him. I noticed the defined muscles in his broad back. He was tall too – over a head taller than me; in fact, I don't even think the top of my head even reached his shoulder. But then again, I was pretty short.

I peeked around him, staring at Jasper. I still had no clue what the hell was going on. I could see that no one was about to explain though. What was also even _more_ confusing, was the protective stance Edward held in front of me. I didn't get it – not that I was complaining, I was just completely puzzled.

Jasper looked around the room, narrowing his eyes. His eyes didn't even look like him anymore. They were wild, and terrifying, if that was even possible. I cringed, not being able to look away. I looked at Rosalie; even _she_ seemed nervous. I wondered if all of this was normal.

"Stop staring at me!" Jasper hollered loudly, causing me to cringe once again. "All of you," He darted his eyes around the room to the three of us. "Why are you fucking staring at me?" He yelled even louder, his voice full of rage. I didn't understand, and I was completely unaware of anything else going on at the moment. "I didn't do anything, okay?!"

"Jasper!" Edward shouted at him, his voice a mixture of pleading and nervousness. "Jasper, stay _with_ us!" He took a step towards him, and I did as well. I didn't know why, but I felt that being behind Edward was the safest place to be for now.

"I'm not a piece of fucking trash!" Jasper yelled, raising his voice to an insanely loud level. I wasn't sure who he was talking about. I wasn't sure _what _he was talking about. I just stared at him, eyes wide and confused. "Stop pretending I don't exist!" Okay, who the fuck was he even talking to? None of this made sense. I was frightened at the moment for the future. What was happening?

"You _are_ Jasper Hale!" Edward told him in a loud, stern voice. "Vous êtes Jasper," He said quieter, more seriously. Jasper seemed to respond to that. Recognition flashed in his eyes for just a moment, and I could tell that he was trying really hard to do something. To remember something. Just a whisper this time, "You _are_ Jasper."

I wasn't sure how long we all stood there. Maybe ten seconds. Could have been ten minutes. Eventually though, Jasper sank himself into the sofa, shaking his head. "Edward?" He asked, looking up at him with vulnerable eyes.

Edward took another step towards him, and this time I didn't follow behind. I was fairly positive that everyone was okay now. "Yeah, man?" He asked, sounding relieved and a little exasperated as well.

Jasper shook his head once again, and shut his eyes momentarily before opening them. "What happened?" He sounded so broken. It was almost painful to listen to. It was like he straining himself to get the words out. Still though, I wasn't sure what had just happened.

"You slipped for a little bit, Jazz," He sat himself next to him and patted him on the shoulder. "It's okay though, you're okay." Even _I_ believed the sincerity in Edward's words. Lately, his emotions had really been confusing me. Okay, that was a lie. They had been driving me fucking crazy. I didn't know _what_ to think of him at the moment.

Jasper nodded, rubbing his face with both hands. His shoulders were tense, along with the rest of his body. "Thanks, Ed," He sounded distracted. "Listen, I think I'm gonna go for a walk, okay? I'll be back later tonight. I'm staying here tonight." Edward nodded at him.

As soon as Jasper got up and headed to the door, Alice appeared on the other side. Her face had been chipper and excited. That changed as soon as her eyes met Jasper's. She looked at Edward, and his eyes were grim. He gave her one, hard nod, silently confirming something I didn't know. Her eyes filled with sadness, and she looked almost in pain.

Silently, she followed him out the door, not saying a single word to any of us. After the both of them had shut the door, an uncomfortable silence followed.

_What the fuck just happened?_

Edward stared ahead at nothing, completely avoiding any knowledge that I actually existed. Suddenly, Rosalie sighed, standing up. Great, if she left, then I'd be alone with Edward. I wasn't the best guesser, but I was fairly sure he didn't want my company.

"I'm going to go find Emmett," She told us. Well, just Edward. I don't think she had warmed up to the idea of me being here anymore than her opinions had been yesterday. "I'm staying at his place tonight, okay?" Edward looked up at her and nodded, not seeming to care either way.

As soon as she left, I silently debated with myself whether I should leave or not too. More than anything, I wanted to get some answers from Edward, but I wasn't exactly sure if he would agree to that. In fact, all of my hopes for him being nice to me again vanished as soon as he went back to ignoring me.

No, I decided, he was going to talk to me, dammit. I deserved _some_ sort of respect, didn't I? I did. I was a person, so was he. If I gave him respect, maybe I'd get some in return. What a fucked up world would it be if I didn't? I decided that I wasn't going to leave, and I let the stubborn part of me take over.

A careful enough distance away from him, I sat down on the couch as well, making myself comfortable. I could have swore I heard him sigh in defeat, but I wasn't positive. I crossed my legs and crossed my arms, making myself comfortable. I wanted to tell him we could do this the easy way, or the hard way, but it wasn't necessary. As soon as I was about to speak, he interrupted.

"Jasper's got multiple-personality-disorder, okay?" He stated, his tone strained. "It's minor, but it's still pretty bad." I was shocked; I had heard of people having it before, but never really understood it. Now I did. Now, all of his previous actions had made sense. I nodded solemnly, trying not to smile at the fact that he was actually talking to me.

"We all think it's because he was treated like shit by his father, or abused or something," He continued, eyes still focusing on nothing particular. "He can't remember much of his childhood though, so no one really knows for sure." Now he had lost me. I tilted my head, a confused expression on my face.

He noticed, and smirked at me, probably at the fact that I couldn't follow a completely simple discussion. No, this was _not_ my fault. He couldn't just drop something on me like that and expect me to be able to follow along. "Jasper's father left him and his mom when he was fourteen. He's eighteen now." Once again, I had to keep the smile from spreading across my face. It was fucked up to smile now, but I had just figured out yet _another_ story. I only had two left. I think those were the two I wanted the most.

"What about his mom?" I couldn't help but ask, wondering if that was the right question or not. He still seemed somewhat at ease though, so I decided that it was okay.

"She's always gone. She works three jobs to support the two of them." He paused for a moment, "Jasper would work, but he's in his senior year. Your senior year's a bitch," He turned to grimace the last part at me. I nodded in agreement – it most certainly was. Wait, he had already finished high school? How old was he?

"How old are you?" I blurted, not regretting it. The only way to find out more about this guy was questions. He never was forced to answer, but I might as well give it a go and throw a few out there for him.

"I'm eighteen," He responded without actually looking at me. I hated that. Couldn't he look into my damn eyes for one second? He had yesterday. Yesterday, he had been different. I was starting to wonder if _he_ was the one suffering from multiple-personality-disorder instead of Jasper. I almost asked.

"Wouldn't that mean you're still in high school though?" I asked thoughtfully.

Finally, he looked at me. He pulled back one side of his mouth into a sexy, half-grin, completely with a cocky edge to top it off. I think every bone in my body just turned to fucking jell-o. _Oh, stop it Swan, you've seen guys before_. "I'm smart," He told me simply, "I skipped a grade."

I wanted to stop bugging him with my questions, but I couldn't help it. They just continued to flow from my mouth without my permission. "Why aren't you in college then?" I asked him, sounding like a mom. Fuck. I wasn't going to talk to a Greek God like I was his _mother_. I kicked myself internally.

"Because my family's here," He responded, sounding distant. His thoughts were clearly somewhere else, "I don't need to go anywhere yet. They need me." The last part sounded like he was directing towards himself. Sometimes, you were strange, Edward Cullen. As pretty as you were, you were also pretty odd. I obviously didn't tell him this though, for fear he'd kick me out. I was actually surprised he hadn't yet.

"You mean your parents?" I questioned him, fiddling with the ring on my finger my mother had given me from Aruba. He didn't answer, and so I looked up at him. His face had completely paled, and his shoulders became incredibly tense. He was trying desperately hard not to show any emotions in his eyes, but failing miserable.

"No, I don't mean my parents." He said in a tight, quiet voice. His voice had also been final. I knew that there would be no more discussion on this topic. So once again, that brought me back to my two original theories. He hated his parents, or they were dead. I frowned. Both scenarios were tragic.

Maybe, Edward Cullen really was deeper than I had originally thought. . .

**Edward**

I had slipped again. Dammit, why was I still talking to her? Hadn't I promised myself I'd stay away? Yes, yes I had. And I was failing that promise quite fucking pathetically. I _was_ pathetic. Why did she even want to talk to me? I wasn't interesting. Far from, actually.

My attempt to keep her completely out of my life wasn't exactly working. It probably _would_ have been working a whole lot better if she wasn't hot as hell. She was hot. _Very_ hot. I shook my head; I couldn't think about that. I couldn't drag her into this life I lived. I couldn't put her life in danger because of what was after me. _Who_ was after me. Fate was after me, and there was no stopping it.

It was different with her then for the others. With the others, I had come to _them_. And I was still trying to decide if that had been my best decision or not. Of course it was, I reminded myself. As I had told Bella, they _were_ my family. Best damn family ever, as a matter of fact.

They had chosen to mingle their fate with mine though. I told them what they would be risking, and they all agreed that it didn't matter. It was different with Bella though. So, so different. I could tell that she had a lot going for her; She was sexy, smart, funny. All of the things I didn't deserve. Or need. If she became too involved with me, I knew that every possible future she had for herself would be gone. I couldn't let that happen.

Bella was stubborn though. That was obvious from the moment she walked through the door. All the walls I had been trying to put up from her, closing myself off, continued to be torn down. Somehow, she'd manage to get me every time, making me snap and talk to her. I still couldn't believe it.

I couldn't talk to her. Talking involved feelings, and feelings involved a hell of a lot more than just words. At this point, my feelings were the most import thing. If I could keep them in check, I'd be just fine. At least, that's what my plan was. If that didn't work, I didn't know what the hell I was suppose to do.

This, for example, sitting next to her, this wasn't good. My first mistake. I couldn't make her think we were friends. Sure, I _wanted_ to be, but if I wanted to remain distant from her, friends would be out of the question. I stood up, walking over to the recliner. I could feel her eyes following me the whole way.

I took out my notebook; I hadn't wrote in it today, and was quite eager to. I wasn't about to do that while I was in the middle of a conversation with a pretty girl though. . .Fuck, I had done it again. I had to stop calling her pretty – even though she was much more than that. That word, along with many others caused my damn hormones to act up. Traitor hormones.

Like yesterday, I had actually told her _out loud_ that her eyes were pretty. Of course, she had told me the same, leading me to believe that she was semi-crazy. No one noticed my eyes. _No one_. In fact, no one noticed me period. But after she had told me that, an emotion swept over me, and I couldn't help but to give her the compliment back, because seriously.

Her eyes were _really_ pretty.

I shook my head, needing to stop thinking about her like that. I had been doing amazing today, up until everyone left us alone together once again. Did they do it on purpose? Did they _want_ to test my self-restraint? There'd be hell to pay if that really _was_ the case. No, I told myself, I knew that none of them would ever do that to me.

The fact that all of them were so keen to let her into our lives was the other problem. All of this would be a whole lot easier if they hated her. I realized that could never to the case though. Naturally, Bella was a charming person. And I _hated_ her for it. Charming and sexy. Someone up there fucking hated me. _Gee, thanks. As if I haven't been through enough hell already_.

She was also nosy. Always asking about people's personal lives. I knew it wasn't really her fault; I probably would have done the same thing in her shoes, but it still pissed me off. She didn't piss me off, I pissed _myself _off. Why could I never refuse her an answer? This had all worked so much better when she hadn't been talking to me.

It was so much easier ignoring someone who never spoke. But, Bella was clearly a force of nature. I knew there was no avoiding her, as much as I wanted to, and as much as I tried. I'd have to _keep_ trying though, as hard as I could, to make her know that I wasn't interested in friendship. Believe me, I _was _interested in friendship, and whole lot of other things, but if she knew that, I knew she'd never stay away.

It'd be hard, but I'd do it for her welfare. As long as a stuck to my most important rule, I'd be just fine. Maybe, that'd be harder than I had initially thought. _Tell no one_. That was basically my motto. Sure, I had told them bits and pieces of what had happened, but I never shared the whole story. I never shared the things I couldn't relive.

Suddenly, Bella pulled me from my hectic thoughts. She cleared her throat, and I met her gaze, quickly looking away before she realized she had the power to hold it. I pretended to write, hoping she'd take that as some sort of hint.

"Edward," Of course she wouldn't. She _was_ Bella. "Why did you stand in front of me before?" I froze, pretending I hadn't heard her. "With Jasper, I mean." Yes, I _know_ what you mean. I just _really_ don't want to answer.

I thought for a minute. At the time, I hadn't thought about it, I just did it. "I didn't want you to get her," I responded finally, and her eyes immediately soften. Oh, shit. Wrong answer. "For Jasper's sake, you know." I continued lamely. "He would beat himself up about it later if he knew he hurt you." At least it was true. Sometimes, Jazz got violent. He always hated himself for it afterwards.

Her face fell a little, but she nodded, bowing her head slightly. Great – was there anyway I could do this without hurting her feelings? No, there probably wasn't. It's not like it mattered too much though in the first place; We hardly knew each other.

"I should probably go," She said, awkwardly standing up and heading for the door. That was probably best. But why was I suddenly wanting her to stay? I didn't. It was just my imagination. I had to say _something_ though. As much as I didn't want her to like me, I wanted her to at the same time.

Stupid Edward got the better of Smart Edward, and before she left I stopped her. "Bella?" She slowly turned herself to face me. Her eyes were kind of sad. "Je suis désolé," I told her quietly. I didn't know why, but whenever there was anything remotely emotional I had to say, I'd say it in French. It was just easier. She stared at me, confused. "I'm sorry," I whispered in explanation, ducking my head.

Her and I both knew I was apologizing for more than one thing.

Know one showed up for over two hours. Later that night, Jazz and Alice walked through the door, both looking relieved. I gave them a small smile, not paying much attention. Just as Rose had promised, her and Emmett stayed put at his house for the night.

We ordered a pizza, the three of us – well, Jazz and I – devouring it like we'd never eaten a real meal. Alice rolled her eyes at us the whole time, taking small dainty bites of her single piece. "So, how long was Bella here?" She asked casually, causing Jasper to choke on his pizza. I pounded his back, as he tried swallowing the _right_ way.

Knowing he wasn't capable of a decent response, I spoke up for him. "Not that long, she left a little after you guys did." For some reason, it made me uncomfortable to talk about her. When you're trying as hard as fucking possible not to show emotion towards someone, it didn't exactly work out if you had to talk about them all of the time.

"I really like her guys," She told us both with a big smile. "I think she's super sweet."

The both of us looked at each other, not saying anything. That's what I liked about Jazz. He somehow always knew the meaning of my silence, and knew when and when he shouldn't fuck with me. Like now, I think he knew that the subject of Bella was not something I wanted to touch in on. Very subtly, he nodded.

"I think you're super sweet," He countered, grinning all big and goofy at her. Fucking genius. She giggled happily, blowing him a kiss even though they were right next to each other. I really appreciated their relationship. _So_ much more than Em and Rose's. They walked around practically humping each other day and night. These two, they were more private and personal. I loved them for that.

I zoned out on them, not really wanting to listen to the fluff-fest going on in front of me. Instead, I flipped on the TV and watched the news. Nothing interesting ever happened. It was always the same shit all of the time. I learned a while ago, that the news consisted of three things. _Death, weather, _and _sports_. An interesting life us American's lead, wasn't it?

After a while, the two of them decided to turn in. I figured sleep wouldn't be a bad idea either, since I didn't get much of it last night. When I was lone, normally I rarely got any. At least with the two here tonight, I was assured some amount of sleep.

I strayed out on the futon while the both of them headed for the spare, make-shift bedroom. We were all really quite lucky with this place, actually. After a few years, we'd inherited all sorts of furniture and living necessities from others willing to give it. Really, it wasn't a bad place. Sure, it was a little old, but very do-able. Definitely do-able.

When I was finally comfortable, I shut my eyes, dreading tomorrow. I was dreading it, because all I did day and night was spend it locked up in this damn place. It was boring as fucking hell, and I didn't know how much more I could take before I went insane. I mean, I felt like a fucking vampire; always inside.

Tomorrow, I'd go out and so something. I had no clue what that something would be, but at least I wouldn't be locked in here _again_. The thought almost had me smiling. I rarely smiled any more. There was no need to. Soon, I was asleep. . .

Suddenly, there was loud screaming. I opened my eyes and shot straight up, frantically darting my eyes around the room. It took me a few moments before I realized that it was just Alice. She hadn't stayed here in over a week. I had almost forgotten about her nightmares. Both relief and pity swept over me as I settled back down into my pillow.

I heard Jasper desperately trying to calm her down from the other room. Almost every night, she'd wake up with blood-curling screams. None of us knew quite what her nightmares about; she didn't even know. Jasper had once guessed they were of her parent's who left her, which seemed like a definite possibility.

And just like Jazz and is MPD, she'd never remember what had happened when she woke up. At first, we all asked her about them a lot, but after a while, we just gave up. Nothing seemed to make them go away, and I think eventually, she just excepted that. I sighed quietly, settling myself back into a comfortable position.

Wondering what the point of anything was anymore. . .

* * *

**CHAPTER SONG: **Cat and Mouse – Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Je Suis Désolé – _"I'm sorry"

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_**Reviews are better than Edward's futon.**_


	3. Toujours Espoir

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**Bella - Toujours Espoir**

The next week was very much the same. I woke up, ate breakfast, went to school, and avoided Jake. I'd cancel all of my social plans, turn down dates, and ignore people, _just_ so I could spend time with The Runaways. After school, everyday, I'd drive down the familiar alley, always eager for a visit. Normally, all of them weren't there at the same time, but I took whatever company I could get.

I had learned more about Jasper's life, which Alice had explained to her best abilities to me. I had learned more about Emmett's mother, and how much he cared for her. I had learned more about Alice, and her many different foster families. She often laughed and joked about all of the crazy experiences she always had, and I would giggle along to humor her. Really, I felt horrible for her though. And I knew that was the last thing she wanted – sympathy.

Rosalie continued to bitch at me, complaining about the most random shit all of the time. I had yet to figure out what her problem was, or what was wrong with her life. Honestly, I was making progress in my friendship with her though. When she'd insult me, usually it was a good day. Good times.

And then, there was Edward. Everyday, I'd spot his messy hair in the corner chair, writing up a storm in that damn notebook of his. I wanted to know _so_ badly what he was writing – lyrics, poems? I wasn't sure. One thing I _was_ sure of though, was that he hated me. That was the only way to explain his behavior.

Ever since those first two days, when he had talked and smiled with me, I had never heard a word out of his mouth. Sure, there were the occasional "keep the fuck down, I'm writing" and my personal favorite, "I don't sell any goddamn antiques!" That was usual his response to the poor, little old ladies who somehow thought that his 'home' was actually still a store. Other than that, he would totally ignore me. Never saying a single word, or acknowledging my existence.

To say I was disappointed would be an understatement. I was completely depressed. I tried my hardest not to show it though. I'd normally shoot him a grin or something, but after the first couple of days, I just gave up trying. What I really wanted to know was just the reasoning behind his actions.

Clearly, I'd need a miracle to get an actual response out of him though.

I wanted to hate him, and to be mad at him for being so mean, but I just couldn't find it in me. Something about him made me not be able to. There was just... I couldn't describe it. But I knew there was something. Something that told me I should continue my pursuit on being friendly towards him, and hope that in the end, my actions pay off. But honestly? I didn't have a clue what to think of him anymore.

I also had gotten nowhere figuring anything more about him or his past. As of now, the information I had, and that he had given me, lead me to believe that he was dropped by aliens from a space ship. He had no family, that I knew of. He had no anything.

When I walked into the room today, only Alice and Edward were there. Happy that Alice would at least chat with me for a good couple of hours, I plopped down in the seat next to her, completely ignoring Mr. Green Eyes in the corner. Without even looking at him, I knew that he was writing again. He was always writing.

"Hi Alice," I said enthusiastically. "How were things today?" It was a routine question I'd always ask everyone. Normally, the answer would be boring, or edited. Not with Alice though, because God knows Alice was _never_ boring or edited. Each day, she was becoming more and more my favorite.

"Things were good," She told me honestly. "School was boring, but that's nothing new." When she grinned, I amiled back and nodded in agreement. "Honestly though, nothing exciting happened today."

"Well, you'll love this," I laughed. She always loved to hear about Jacob, and my crazy ex-boyfriend stories. "Today, Jacob followed me _everywhere_." Out of the corner of my eyes, I could have sworn Edward's head was now staring intently in our direction. I was right.

"Who's Jacob?" He asked curiously, not sounding too interested. I pretended not to hear him, just like he always pretended not to see me. It was probably my imagination anyways. He was really talking to _me_.

Feeling pleased with myself, I continued on. "Well, every single class, after he was done stalking me, he'd have some guy from the football team give me a note from him." I made of face of disgust. "All of them were compliments of how good I was in bed!" She squealed and clamped her hand over her mouth. "I know, flattering, right?" I giggled with her.

"Bella," She laughed quietly, "When you said he was a dumbass, you sure weren't kidding one bit! I mean, what a horrible way to win a girl back!" Yes, I loved Alice indeed. If it were Jessica I was having this conversation with, the only response I would get would be, _Aw, that's so sweet! You should take him back! Why won't you? That's so romantic! _Ugh, romantic my ass.

I nodded thoroughly in agreement, smiling at how open I could be with Alice. Irritated, Edward let out a loud breath. Once again, I pretended not to hear. "Who's Jacob?" He repeated, louder this time. "Is he your ex, Bella?" Well, at least I knew he _was_ talking to me.

Without saying anything, or even looking in his direction, I nodded in confirmation. Alice and I leaped into a conversation about the joys of caller ID, and many other things in that nature. I loved that I could smile and be myself around this place. It was fucking _amazing_. Really, I felt like a whole new person lately.

Suddenly, I heard Edward get up. He had set his notebook down somewhere, and walked over to the sofa. Surprising me, he sat down less than a foot away, our legs almost touching. It was very distracting, _and_ confusing. I pretended not to notice. "How long did you date Jacob?" He asked randomly, sounding both at ease and nervous.

I turned to face him, shooting him a very skeptical look. What was he playing here? Did he think he was being funny? I felt a surge of anger swell in me as I crossed my arms. Sadly, his green eyes didn't allow me to be mad at him for that long. "Too long." I finally responded, detached. He seemed thoughtful.

I turned back to Alice, and began a new conversation with her. After a few moments, Edward stood up and walked out of the room. Another few minutes passed, and he appeared, sitting back down in his chair with an iPod and earphones in his hand. I noticed his face, and how it had changed completely from only five minutes ago.

He had himself all closed up again, and carefully distanced, like usual. Like he knew I was staring at him, his eyes glanced up and met mine. Before I could look away, embarrassed, he somehow held my gaze. It was like something that he was silently trying to tell me. Though his eyes were beautiful, they were hard to look at. They were just so sad. It was unbearable.

I had to look away. I remembered Alice, who must've just watched that whole thing. The look on her face confused me. It was a mixture of concern, excitement, knowing, and sorrow. I didn't know how the hell all of those four emotions could be put together, but that was the look on Alice's face.

"I'm going to take you shopping," I suddenly told her, smiling. "It'll be my treat." I waited for her answering smile, knowing she couldn't resist even if she wanted to. She'd always tell me how much she loved my clothes, and how much she wished she had an unlimited supply of money. Lucky for me, that's exactly what I did have. Lucky for her, today, that unlimited supply would belong to her.

After a few moments, a huge smile broke across her face, and I almost thought she'd break into some sort of touchdown dance. "Hell yes!" She sang loudly, leaning over to hug me happily. I let out a breathless laugh, hugging her back. If I would have known I'd get this sort of response from her, I would have asked a long time ago.

She told me to give her five minutes to get ready, and ran into one of the back rooms. I remained sitting on the couch, my legs crossed comfortably. I glanced at Edward. He was staring at me with an expression I didn't recognize. "Why do you do that?" I suddenly asked, irritated.

"Do what?" His face was full of fake innocence. He knew exactly what I was referring to.

"Ignore me. Pretend I'm not here." I paused. "Why?"

Something flashed in his eyes, and it looked a little bit like pain. Then, he became hesitant. He pulled his eyebrows together, thinking to himself. Finally, his eyes met mine once again. "Because that's how it _has_ to be, Bella." I could have swore I heard a slight hint of regret in his tone. "Trust me, it's better this way."

What was he getting at here? Oh. He probably had a girlfriend. He probably thought that I was trying to get with him or something like that. I snorted. He raised an eyebrow. "Is she pretty?" I asked, still sounding a little annoyed that we couldn't at least be friends.

"Who?" He asked, actually sounding confused this time.

"Your girlfriend." I answered simply. "How long have you guys been together?"

This time, it was him who snorted. A smile spread across his face as he shook his head. "I don't have a girlfriend, Bella." He almost laughed. "That's not the reason that I don't talk to you." No girlfriend? I had to admit – I was a little shocked. He was still staring at me; now with more of an at-ease look on his face.

"Then why _don't_ you talk to me?" I couldn't help but ask. Right as I asked this, Alice skipped happily into the room. Damn it, well, there goes my chance to get any answers. Who knew how long he'd go without talking to me again. I narrowed my eyes at him as a crooked smile spread across his face. Oh sure, now he was all fucking cocky.

I tore my eyes away from him, not saying anything more as the two of us walked out of the door. Alice eagerly jumped into the passenger seat of the Ferrari, and I rolled my eyes as she cranked up a loud rap CD I had in my car.

I weaved through traffic, heading towards the mall. Alice was silent the whole drive, only occasionally singing along with songs she knew. I could tell that she was thinking about something. Not wanting to pry, I didn't bring it up. The last thing I wanted was to get on Alice's bad side. Though, I doubted she even had one.

We stopped in almost every store and outlet. At first, Alice didn't accept me buying her all of these clothes. Of course, it only took me a few minute to persuade her to accept them. After we jumped that little hurdle, the rest of the time was fun, normal, girl-shopping.

She didn't say anything of remote importance until about an hour into our trip. "What does Edward talk to you about?" She asked curiously while holding up a black dress to her slim figure. I nodded in approval, urging her to try it on.

"Um," I said, kind of confused. "Not really anything important. . ." I paused for a moment, "Actually, he just ignores me most of the time." Why did my voice sound sad when I said this? "Why does it matter?" I asked, sounding distracted.

"Oh." Alice's face was thoughtful as she pulled another top off the racket. "It's just weird, I guess." She said in a quiet voice, looking everywhere except my face.

I raised an eyebrow. "Why is it weird?" I was now honestly confused. She'd have to explain somehow, I figured. I knew she wasn't meaning for it to come out as an insult to me. I could tell she was confused as well. Her following silence was thoughtful.

When her eyes met mine, they were completely serious. "Well, Edward's really quiet." She said almost somberly. "He's always keeping to himself, and pretty distant from the world, you know?" I nodded my head. That's _exactly_ what I noticed the first time I met him. "I mean, after what happened a couple of years ago. . ." She trailed off, biting her lip.

"What happened a couple of years ago?" Why wouldn't _anyone_ tell me about his forbidden secrets? Honest to God, I'd break someone's neck if I didn't find out soon.

"Bella," She sighed in a whiny tone. I knew she wasn't suppose to really talk about this. I also knew that she had no choice but to tell me now. That's just how Alice worked. "He's never met his father." She told me, "His mother died when he was fifteen." I gasped, immediately regretting all of the stubborn thoughts I had had about him before.

"That's so sad." I whispered.

She nodded. "He won't tell me how it happened. He won't tell _anyone_. I think he's scared to talk to us. I'm not sure why. . .we're like his only family." This subject was a lot darker than I had ever planned on it being. "He's kind of a loner." She said sadly, completely caught up in the conversation. The both of us all but forgetting that we were still in a clothing boutique.

"That's why I think it's weird that he's so keen to you." Suddenly, I felt oddly significant. Maybe his words before had actually meant something. What that something was, I had no idea. _It's better this way_, He had said. Maybe, there _were_ good reasons he hid under all of his mysterious bravado.

After a few moments of silence, a slow smile spread across her little pixie face. "I think he likes you." She sang quietly. I snorted. "Oh, come on, Bella!" She playfully shoved my shoulder. "I mean, that's the only way to explain his behavior." Once again, I snorted. I highly doubted he even considered me a friend.

I really didn't think that was the case at all, actually. I was smart enough by now to understand how Edward worked. I was pretty sure his behavior had nothing to do with me. It was clear that Alice was just as clueless as me, so I didn't press the subject further. Not arguing with her was always a better choice.

I most certainly didn't want to argue with her opinion on a boy who was as close as her brother. Not on my list of things to do for the day… definitely not.

Edward was brought up numerous other times in the day. One of them had been Alice telling me yet again, that Edward liked me. I silently disagreed, keeping my opinions to myself. Another time had been when she told me about the things they did for fun together, the five of them. The last one had been the most interesting.

Alice had been talking non-stop, literally, and I decided it'd be best to provide some of the conversation. So, I really had no choice but to touch into more personal aspects.

"Alice," I said nervously. "How do you do it?" She gave me a confused look, glancing at a pair of heels as we entered into our third shoe store. "How do you always keep such a positive attitude, you know? Like, even though you know things are shit."

"Toujours Espoir," She responded simply. Oh wonderful, another French speaking friend. Why the hell did they all speak French? I mean, it was only Alice and Edward, but seriously?

"You too?" I responded warily. She gave me another questioning glance. I was starting to think that she thought I was mentally-challenged. It was kind of believable. "Speak French?" I clarified.

She quickly shook her head, and I was relieved. "Oh, definitely not. That's just Edward." I waited for her to explain her earlier words. "See, that's what he always tells us. At least, he use to. . ." She trailed off for a moment, looking a little abashed. "It means 'always hope', or something like that. I just. . .like the motto." I could tell she thought I was going to laugh at her. I didn't.

"That's really pretty," I said, in somewhat awe. She stared at me. "It's a good motto," I agreed, "And I really like French. It's such a beautiful language." Now, at least she knew I didn't have brain problems, and that I _could_ in fact, form a smart, normal sentence.

A sly smile spread across her face. "You should have Edward teach you sometime. . ." She raised an eyebrow suggestively, and I shook my head, grinning at her. Would she ever quit?

I couldn't take it anymore. It was either tell her off now, or deal with her stupid innuendos every other damn minute. "Look, Al," I told her as she was trying on some flats. "It's not like that. I know that Edward doesn't like me, okay? I don't think he's really the. . .relationship type." I left the last part as more of a question, figuring the answer would be interesting.

She pursed her lips in thought for a few moments, silently thinking to herself about something. Instead of answering my question, or returning my statement, she said something different. "You know, he's really hurt, don't you?" Hurt? Mentally, maybe. Physically? I didn't think so. That made no sense. "Like, it kills us all to look at him every day, knowing he's so hurt." Still not helping anything, darling, I wanted to tell her.

"Hurt?" I asked.

"Yeah." She responded quietly, sounding like her mind was somewhere other than the check-out at a store. "He's been through a lot." Her tone was quiet, and final. I wondered if it was that she wasn't suppose to tell me, or if she just didn't know herself. "Life's pretty rough for him." I could tell that this conversation was final.

At least I knew she wouldn't bug me about him anymore.

I told her about school; I told her more about Jake, and all about my iffy friendship with Jess. I told her about my parent's, and how they were always gone. I told her about my past relationships, and about the things I liked.

Basically, I poured my fucking heart out to this girl.

I had never been so open with anyone I'd just met before, and I knew that must've meant something. She wasn't a shallow bitch, and I knew she actually cared about what was going on in my life. She listened to every word I said. She was possibly turning into my new best friend. I liked it; I liked it a whole lot.

We stopped at a small diner for supper, taking our seats in a back-booth. The sun was beginning to set over the horizon even though it was still early. As we walked in, I noticed a dark figure from across the street, intently watching me. I ignored him though, figuring it was just my imagination.

After all that had happened today, I finally got the courage to ask her about Rosalie.

In the nicest tone I could manage, I took a sip of my soda, and asked, "What's Rosalie's problem?" It wasn't meant to sound mean, though I'm sure Alice could hear the slight acid dripping in my tone.

I knew Rosalie was also like her sister, but when it came to her, she never seemed as hesitant to talk. Unlike with Edward. "See, Rose's dad has cancer, and is in the hospital," She told me. I felt a surge of pity wash through me, "Her mom left them both a long time ago, and so Rosalie's left in charge of the two."

"Her dad's too ill at the moment to support the two of them, so she has to take matters into her own hands." This didn't sound too good. Knowing Rosalie, well kind of, her methods would probably be a little less. . .pleasant?

Alice's face scrunched up into a mixture of pain and disgust. "She works on the streets as a prostitute." Well fuck, if I hadn't felt sorry for her about her dad, I felt sorry for her _now_. "It's not the most practical job, but to her and her dad, it makes the most money." She finished simply while taking a bite of her spaghetti.

"Oh." Was all I could respond. Then, I thought of something. "Wait, but her and Emmett. . ." I raised an eyebrow, trailing off in serious confusion. "How exactly does _that_ work?"

She let out a quiet laugh, rolling her eyes. "It's complicated. . ." She sighed, "They're not together, but it's not a secret that they like each other. They manage. Em's really sweet, as you know, and understands her situation. Sometimes, they have arguments, but most of the time, they can work through them."

I hadn't realized until now that my mouth was hanging open. She laughed once again, "I know, I know. Weird. Well, I hate to tell you this, but we're sort of based off of weird. Don't worry, you'll get used to it." She flashed me a dazzling smile and winked.

Well, that left me with just Edward. He was the only one I had no information about. Well, at least now I knew that his mother and father weren't around. That was definitely something. It had to be deeper than that though. There had to be more.

Now I knew how Rosalie worked, and I also knew how to use that as an advantage towards her. I understood, like every other child, that remorse and sympathy towards parents from others was a good thing. If I wished her and her dad luck, I knew she'd hate me just a _little_ less. I hoped, at least. I'd try sometime in the near future.

After we finished eating, we headed back out onto the streets for our last few hours of shopping. . .

**Edward**

I dialed Alice's number once again, but still, no answer. "Dammit," I muttered under my breath, frantically throwing a pair of shoes on. I wondered why I had never gotten Bella's number from someone. In insistences like these, it could have been useful.

I flew out the door, running out of the alley and darting my eyes around for an abandoned car. If I couldn't have the two of them to safety soon enough, hell would most certainly happen.

It had been less than ten minutes when I received a phone call from them. "We're hunting." Was all the bleak voice said from the other line. A recognizable voice I shuttered to hear; one that meant death. One of three whom simply would not stop until they got what they wanted. Someone close to me.

Marcus, Aro, and Caius would always give me the forewarning when they were on the move. I knew that Alice and Bella were still out shopping, walking the sidewalks and streets unaccompanied. They could recognize Alice for sure, and if Bella was with her, they'd take that to their advantage as well.

And fuck, I'd rather kill myself than bring another innocent person into this shit. So far, we all had been doing a good job of avoiding their deadly methods and plans. I was honestly surprised at how well we managed to avoid them all of the time. They were smart – I had to give them that. They knew what they were doing, and that fact scared the shit out of me.

I spotted a lonely pick-up parked on the sidewalk, with no one anywhere near it. Perfect. I sprinted towards it, opening the door and hurdling into the front seat. Immediately I began hot wiring the ignition, something Rose had taught me a long time ago. In record time, the truck was roaring to life, and I was speeding down the streets.

I glance towards the sky; it was already getting dark out. This wasn't good at all, and I knew I'd have some major explaining to do after this. _That's_ why I didn't want Bella near me. Near us.

Lately, I'd been doing a pretty shitty job of letting her know that though. Somehow, my curiosity always got the best of me, and caused me to break down and find out more about her. At least I knew I was doing a good job of pissing her off. I didn't know if I should have been happy or sad about that.

_You should be happy, dammit, you don't want her to like you, remember? _I reminded myself angrily.

I continued swerving through the streets, scanning my eyes for either the girls, or the gang. I'd really rather like to find the girls first, going on the assumption that nothing had happened to them yet. God, I'd never forgive myself it anything _did_.

A huge surge of relief washed over me when I spotted the two walking down the sidewalk, about to enter another store. I pushed the gas pedal down even harder to reach them before they disappeared into the store. All of the relief immediately vanished when I spotted Marcus, fifty yards from them, intently watching and following them.

The truck frantically pulled up to the side walk, making a loud screeching noise as I slammed on the brakes. All three head turned in my direction, and I quickly rolled down the window. "Get in!" I shouted, catching the attention of a few passers-by.

Alice, already having a clue what was going on, pulled Bella towards the car. Bella's expression almost made me laugh, if the situation weren't so serious. She looked confused, worried, annoyed, and happy for some reason, all at the same time. Alice swung open the door as the two of them quickly climbed into the back seat. They had thrown their thousand bags in the trunk, and I was already pushing the accelerator.

For a moment, just a moment, Marcus's eyes met mine.

I turned down an unknown street, making sure he didn't know where I was heading. Bella's irritated voice sounded loudly from the back seat. "What the hell is going on?" Her tone pissed me off, considering I just saved her life.

"It's a matter of life or death, sweetheart," I responded bitterly, clutching tighter to the steering wheel. "Now if you could maybe _not_ talk. . ." She cut me off.

"If you don't explain, I'm getting out of this truck." She warned. God dammit, why did she have to be so difficult? I shoved my foot down even harder onto the gas pedal as the engine whined in protested. I took a mental note to pick a better car next time.

"I'm not stopping." I gritted through my teeth.

"I didn't say you needed to." She responded curtly, completely serious.

The volume in my voice rose. "Stop being so fucking ridiculous," I yelled, then sighed. "Stay in the damn car, and I'll explain soon enough." My tone was exasperated. She went silent, not saying anything more. Alice, who hadn't gotten a word in yet, spoke up.

"Nice car," She responded sarcastically. I could hear the eye roll in her voice. She was really against me 'borrowing' strangers cars. Really, I didn't have any other choice though. I wasn't going to take the time to go and find some nice Mercedes. All we needed was more attention drawn to us.

I let out a harsh laugh. "Next time, I'll remind myself to pick one more to your liking."

I caught her smile in the mirror. Despite the situation we were in, she was still smiling. "That's all I ask." I shook my head, rolling my eyes, speeding even faster down the roads. Who knew where the three of them could have been hiding out; following us, driving behind us, hiding in buildings. I debated on whether or not I should stop the car at all. I continued driving.

The tank of gas was getting closer and closer to empty as I drove aimlessly around the outskirts of town. It had been over an hour, and I knew I probably could have headed back, but I just wanted to be on the safe side. You didn't take chances when people's lives were at stake.

I glanced over my shoulder, finding both girls sound asleep in the backseat. Alice was curled into the side, while Bella had her head rested on Alice's shoulder. My eyes stayed on her a second too long, suddenly making me wish I was in Alice's position.

That's when I knew it was time to go back.

**Bella**

The next thing I knew, I was being gently shaken. I fluttered my eyes open, not being able to see anything because of the darkness. At first, I didn't know where I was. Then, it took my mind a few seconds to process the day's events. If they had all happened, I should be sitting in a strange car with Alice and Edward.

My eyes adjusted to the darkness, widening when I realized that that's where I really was. Alice, now just waking up as well, sat up in her seat. I followed, rubbing my hands over my eyes. I couldn't remember falling asleep at all. Weird.

My head, still foggy of sleep, blurted out, "Why am I in a car?" My speech came out slurred and sloppy, and I heard Edward's quiet chuckling from the front seat. I narrowed my eyes; He still hadn't explained one damn thing. I swear, if he didn't tell me what was going on soon, I'd bite his fucking head off. Trust me. He didn't want to be on the other end of receiving a bitch-out from me.

"You're not." I heard him say, completely confusing me even more. There was a long pause before he answered seriously, "Technically, this is a truck."

That statement put me over the edge. Without warning, the bitching began. "Listen," I said in a loud, angry voice. "What the _fuck_ is your problem? Do you _enjoy_ confusing the hell out of every person you meet? Is this some kind of joke?" I let out a humorless laugh. "Let me tell you something, Edward. It's not funny!" I took a deep breath. "It's been almost two hours, and still, you haven't explained one damn thing. If you don't, so help me God I will–"

"Bella." Alice cut me off. It almost sounded like she was trying not to laugh. I glanced at Edward in the front, noticing his body shaking with silent laughter. I crossed my arms and narrowed my eyes, sending daggers through his seat. I was _not_ amused.

"Fuck you." I muttered quietly, causing him to laugh even harder. Maybe just not talking at all would be the best idea.

Once they both got a hold of themselves, Alice cleared her throat. "Ed, can you drop me off at Jazzy's tonight?" She asked, "I told him about what happened, and he's really anxious. I think I'll stay there tonight." I saw him nod once, and just now noticed that we were speeding back into the towns limits.

"I'll drop you off at your house, Bella," He said, detached. "Just tell me where it is."

I was about to answer, when suddenly I had an idea. "No," I responded calmly, testing him. "If it really _is_ a matter of life or death like you said, then I'd feel much safer staying with you at your place tonight." My statement completely took him off guard, and I saw him straighten up in his seat.

I needed my answers, and I was fairly sure that unless we were alone, I wasn't going to get them. Try as hard as he could to ignore me, I knew when it was just the two of us, he couldn't. At least, that's what it seemed like. If I stayed over there tonight, I knew that he had no choice but to tell me.

"Your father's head of security," He responded automatically. There was still shock in his voice.

"That's beside the point." I answered curtly. "Look, I've got clothes I could wear tomorrow for school already," I gestured towards my bags in the back. "My car's already there anyways," I told him, "And, I don't want to be alone." I answered his silent question quietly. "My parent's probably aren't even home anyways."

I knew it was wrong to use the guilt trip, but it was the only way I knew I had for him to agree. I saw his face in the mirror, and could tell that he was silently debating with himself. It always seemed like he was struggling for answers, and like he didn't know if the ones he gave were right or wrong.

Finally, he sighed. "Alright, fine."

After we had dropped Alice off, the ride back was dead silent. I remained comfortably in the back seat. Edward had yet to say anything, and the streets lights were beginning to make me drowsy again. If we didn't get back soon, I was afraid that I'd end up falling asleep in the car again. I knew if that happened, my time for questions would disappear.

I yawned loudly, looking out the window to see that we were only about a block away. Suddenly, Edward pulled over to the side of the road and stopped. "What are you doing?" I asked him, wondering why we had stopped.

"This isn't my car," He told me, shutting off the ignition and unbuckling his seatbelt. "This is where I borrowed it, so this is where I'm gonna return it." I nodded, yawning again. Damn it, I had to keep my eyes open. "We're just going to have to walk the rest of the way." I nodded again, unbuckling my seatbelt as well.

He got out of the truck, and I did the same. Remembering my shopping bags, I headed towards the trunk and retrieved them. When I saw how many there were, I frowned. Had I really bought that much? I tried to carry as many as I could, but wasn't succeeding. Edward noticed my dilemma and sighed, walking back to help me.

Once each of our hands were full of bags, we began a brisk walk back. I couldn't understand why he was walking so fast. I tried to keep up with his pace, but continuously tripped and stumbled behind him. When I finally caught up and was walking at his side, I scooted in to him just a little bit closer, trying to make myself feel more secure.

Unfortunately, he didn't like that much and subtly moved a few steps in the other direction. I tried to wash off the small pang of rejection, but for some reason, that small movement affected me more than I would have thought. With a frown on my face, I stayed out of his way and space as we continued to walk.

Eventually, we turned down the dark alley, barely lit up at all. I followed behind Edward as we made our way to the door, oddly afraid that something was going to jump out at me.

He retrieved the key from his back jean pocket, and unlocked the door. I felt instantly relieved the moment we stepped inside. As always, security and comfort washed through me while being in this place. I glanced at Edward, who wasn't looking at me, but at nothing in particular. He seemed extremely distracted about something, though I wasn't sure.

"There's a bedroom to the left of the hallway, and a bathroom to the right." I stood there for a moment, waiting for him to say more. He never did. Without another word, I grabbed my things and walked off to the bedroom.

The pajamas I had bought were probably not the most appropriate to wear at the moment, but they were all I had. I slipped on the tight-fitting camisole and matching small booty-shorts. Throwing my hair up into a loose ponytail and washing my face, I made my way out of the bathroom.

I walked into the room I was instructed, and set all of my bags on the floor. I noticed the small bed in the corner, and walked over to it. It was my own fault really, but all there was on it was a thin blanket, surely not helpful to my skimpy pajama problem. I patted the soft pillow, looking around the room. I wondered if this was Edward's usual room.

There wasn't much on the walls or anything, but he didn't seem to be the kind of person who cared about posters and decoration. I decided to go and ask him if there were any extra blankets I could use.

I walked back into the main room, noticing him now sitting on the sofa. He didn't look up at me, or even acknowledge my presence. He was staring blankly ahead at nothing again, and his elbows were rested on his knees as he had one hand tightly gripped in his hair. I was about to ask him for a blanket, when I noticed a single tear sliding down his cheek.

Instantly I felt sorry for any bad thing I'd ever said to him. It was clear now, as it always had probably been, that Edward Cullen wasn't who everyone thought he was. It was only a single tear, but at the same time, it said everything. Seeing him – without his tough guy facade and closed up attitude, his vulnerable side was there.

Without thinking, I silently crossed the room and walked over to the couch. I sat myself down closely next to him, meeting his eyes for just a moment. For once they weren't hostile or angry towards me. They were pleading, and hurt. I did the first thing that popped into my mind. Hesitantly, I wrapped an arm around him, resting my head softly on his shoulder, holding him together.

I wasn't sure what I was holding him together because of, or what had him so broken, but I didn't let go. He didn't move an inch as we both sat there for a few moments. Even though he wasn't hugging me back or anything, that was okay with me.

At least he wasn't pushing me away. At least he wasn't rejecting me.

After a few minutes of silence, the atmosphere in the room had changed, and I lifted my head off of his shoulder and turned to look at him. His eyes were staring into mine – green, and miles deep. "Three years ago," He said quietly, holding my gaze. "I watched my mother get beaten to death by my uncle." The statement hung in there air, as thick as Chicago smog.

I blinked twice.

It was only then that I realized what I was getting myself into.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Ready Set Go – Tokyo Hotel_  
Why? Clearly Bella's about to jump into a whole new world, and from here on out, her life's about to change. Listen to the song; it fits._

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Toujours Espoir_ – "always hope"

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**Reviews are better than a bitch-out from Bella.**


	4. Chasse Mortelle

**Yes, I have seen New Moon. Twice.  
Yes, it is completely epic and bad ass, and five billion times better than the first.  
Yes, I'm a fan. (:**

**I'm overwhelmed by your guys' support for this story.  
Thank you so much, because it really does mean the world to me.**

**Shout-out to my kick-ass beta, ShadowWolf85.  
HE is responsible for the prettiness of the chapters. :D**

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**Edward - ****Chasse Mortelle**

I always liked to think of myself as a human being; someone who could feel, who could listen, who could care. Never, since the incident, had I been able to feel that way. Until now. For a fleeting moment, I felt like someone.

Bella, completely unexpectedly, had comforted me. Against my better judgment, I hadn't pushed her away this time. I had let her hold me, because God did it feel good. It felt like, for a moment, I wasn't as broken as I thought I was. That there _was_ hope.

And now, two hours later, I was still wide awake and completely unresolved. I didn't know what to do; what I was supposed to do. I had already decided that bringing Bella into my life would be bad. Bad for her, at least. As I had recently learned, she was more effective than I would have ever thought.

Something about her big, brown, innocent eyes had caused me to tell her a slight history of my past. Something I had never shared with _anyone_; the details of my mother's death.

I hadn't been sure why I told her at first, but later, when I had the chance to think about it, I figured it out. It was because there was some sort of understanding and security her face had presented. Her features, everything about them, had been so inviting and warm. Somehow, I knew that telling her would make _something_ right.

And I had been correct. So far, I hadn't been able to regret my decision.

Suddenly, I heard a creek from the floorboards behind me. I quickly shut my eyes, and pretended to be asleep. I made my breathing slow and heavy, and I comfortably snuggled deeper into the cushions.

I could tell that the stranger in the room was Bella. It was obvious – her soft breathing and quiet footsteps gave her away. What was she doing anyways?

I remained still as she seemingly made her way closer. I suddenly felt her sweet breath on my face, and was unsure of what to do. I continued pretending to sleep. Then, as soft as a feather, I felt her lips press momentarily against my forehead.

"Toujours espoir." She whispered.

As she walked away, her words hung in the air of the spacious room. In that moment, something inside of me had changed. Though the change wasn't identifiable, it was there – coursing through me.

_Always hope_.

For the longest time I could, I clung to my mother's old, French motto. After she was murdered, I tried; I tried _so_ hard to continue believing in it. To continue hoping. But after awhile, there was nothing left for me to hope for.

Speaking French wasn't something I did for fun; I did it because it was a part of me – A part of my mother. That was the one thing I knew I'd never be able to let go.

Always hope. It was something I hadn't heard in a long time. It wasn't possible that there was hope for me anymore. Hoping only would kill me in the end. Over time, I had become bitter. My heart had frozen, and I somehow knew that my coldness would always be a permanent part of me. I'd always be full of unwanted hatred and resentment towards the cruelty of the world.

So why was I now suddenly having doubts about what I believed so strongly?

Within me, there was a knot of sadness, born by the stream of love – much as our blood sometimes holds the seed of our destruction. . .

The events in my past couldn't be changed. The consequences of the actions I had taken were unavoidable, along with the punishment of trying to seek out _right_ in the world of so much wrong. A mission aborted very shortly after it had begun.

Maybe it was time for a change though.

Maybe hope would be a good thing for me. I felt a change coming in my bones; I somehow knew this change would end up toying with my very life style. Much like those after me, I knew that this change was unavoidable.

In that moment, for the first time in my life, I didn't know _what _to feel.

So instead of trying, I finally fell into a deep slumber, getting the long night of sleep I much needed.

When I awoke, I felt different. Different, yet still completely the same. I wasn't sure if it was from the thoughts that had occurred in my head last night, or the determination I felt for finally trying to fix this whole damn mess, but I decided to go with it.

I blinked the sleep of out of eyes, groaning and stretching as I attempted to roll off of the futon. My memory also came back to me; intuition that Bella was a room away somewhat startled me at first.

Well, shit. Was she still here? At the moment, I didn't know _where_ the hell we were standing with each other. So many things had happened in so little words.

I had crossed a boundary – I had told her something that I had told absolutely no one. Not Alice, not Emmett. No one. By crossing the very carefully constructed line, I suddenly felt a chill of vulnerability wash over me.

What was I suppose to do now? Tell her about the fucking mafia after me? What about the Volturi? It was something I wished never to have to tell her, but at the same time, I wasn't sure how to avoid it anymore. I knew I didn't owe her anything, even though I told her I'd explain. I just thought that she had the right to know.

Maybe, telling her the sketchy details would be best. That way, she'd have an idea of what she was dealing with. If she wished to continue to be around me, then she had to know _what_ exactly she was risking.

For an odd reason, I craved her company – knowing that she would be loyal to my secrets. Also, I knew that it'd be wrong to pull her into all of this shit.

Which was the right answer?

I heard rustling from the other room, indicating that she was waking up.

I decided not to get up and check on her, going with the assumption that it _may_ come off as just a bit stalker-ish to her. Yeah, just a bit. I glanced at the clock – She had school in an hour.

School. The thought almost didn't register. I wanted to go to school again; be a normal high school kid, captain of the football team, and all of that jazz. But nothing about my life was normal, and I knew that no matter what, that was one of the things I couldn't go back and change.

Because after the incident, I had dropped out of my old school. I had been too traumatized to keep up a social life on top of the stress and burdens that had been laid upon me. So I ended up signing up for one of those online school things.

Not only had he taken away my mother – He had taken away my life as well.

I lay on the futon for a while, thinking with my eyes closed. My ears perked up when I heard a noise coming from the bathroom. "Ouch! Shit!" She muttered loudly, and along came the sound of things falling over.

I decided to check on her. I mean, better safe than sorry, right? I snorted to myself. What an incredibly lame-ass motto. Either way, I still got up and walked to the door.

As I approached it and was about to knock, she swung it open and stumbled out, running straight into my chest. Of course, I hadn't been expecting any kind of impact, so I couldn't hold us up as we fell to the ground.

I fell on my back – not that hard – and she fell on top of my chest. Her wet hair dripped all over my face and chest as we both went completely still for a moment. My eyes widened when I realized that all she had on was a towel.

Holy mother of the fucking lord.

Wet Bella. Only a towel.

Me. Only boxers.

She realized it too, and quickly struggled to get up. She held onto the towel, keeping it tightly wrapped around her chest as she rose to her feet. Once she was off of me, I stood up as well.

Then, the awkwardness came. She stuttered to make words come out of her mouth, and I just sat there, staring at her. It was with all of my absolute control that my eyes stayed _directly_ on her face. "S-sorry," She finally managed to gasp.

I chuckled. It surprised me, but I really couldn't help it. I was so amused by this. "Bella." I ended up saying between my quiet laughter. "You talk too much. Calm down."

A small smile spread across her lips as she looked up at me through her lashes. I read further into the gratitude, and found questioning. I knew she was waiting for me to say more – to say something; anything of an explanation probably would have satisfied her.

But I couldn't. Not yet, at least. Telling Bella even a small part of my past was something I wasn't sure I would even be able to do again, and was something not to be taken lightly. I hadn't made my decision yet anyways.

Besides, I think the both of us required a few more articles of clothing before we went anywhere near trying to start a normal conversation.

So I ended up doing what I was best at – I walked away. Leaving her standing in the hall, confused and looking alone. A pang of anger suddenly filled me. No, she was not alone at all. She had _everyone_ at her side. She had a _life_.

As I sat myself down in the corner chair, I reached for my notebook and a pen. If only she knew how alone _I_ was.

A hollow feeling filled me. _No_ one would ever understand.

The impact my mother's murder left on me was what left me empty and alone. It had changed my perspective on life, and had me question all of my views of the world.

I had given up everything after that. I had given up my old friends, my hopes of a relationship, and all of the hobbies I used to once have.

I had given up trying.

The only thing I still clung on tightly to was protecting my family, and staying alive. Sometimes, I knew that it'd be easier if I was dead, just like the Volturi wanted me to be.

The shell of a life I was living now would be my destruction, and would always haunt me. Because I was positive that if they didn't kill me soon, this place would be the death of me.

I was trapped and bounded into a world that I never wished to have; one future in which was forced upon me in a brutally cruel way.

My wallowing in self-pity was beginning to get quite pathetic. I guess I was just waiting for the sympathy I knew I'd never get. Maybe my head and I both should just shut the hell up. I was starting to over think things way too much.

A half hour later, she appeared again. I glanced up at her through my eyelashes. Her gaze was fixed on anywhere _but_ my face and she looked extremely uncomfortable. I wondered why. Was it still from the previous incident this morning? Or was it the fact that she was still completely clueless of an explanation from last night.

I decided it must've been a little bit of both. I remained silent, pretending she wasn't there at all. I mean, it was bad enough as it was – she had just spent the night, after all. It wouldn't be too long before I became attached against my will.

Out of the corner of her eye, I could see her just standing there. After a few seconds of silence, she cleared her throat. I brought my gaze up to meet her eyes and held it there.

She had that same look as she had had before. It was questioning – they were somehow expecting; waiting for me to say something. I never did. I felt bad, but at the same time, knew it was the only way to proceed until I had made up my mind. When she could tell that I wasn't going to talk, her face sort of coiled back like I had slapped her. I felt almost as bad as if I had.

Because in that moment, I realized that Bella Swan was not the girl she appeared to be. Her appearance had me questioning her personality when I first met her – having her come off as one of those shallow, rich bitches. Now, I could see it clearly in her eyes that there was not one speck of anything stuck-up about her.

When I realized I had been staring, I quickly removed my eyes from hers and back down to my paper. "I, uh," She paused, her voice definitely disappointed, "I'll see you later, I guess."

I looked back at her, and she was waiting for me again. A slightly hopeful expression crossed her face as she waited for my response. She knew it was her last chance for me to tell her. I almost did. But like the asshole I was, I just nodded back at her. A small, grim smile spread across her face, as well as my own.

And then, she was gone.

Now I really was alone.

Emmett stopped by later that morning and we talked a little bit about what happened last night. I hadn't even told Emmett all of the details yet. Then again, he really didn't need to know. Point was – people were after me, and after my loved ones. That's all he really _needed_ to know.

I didn't talk about his personal life to him; He didn't talk to me about mine. It was a great relationship, really. In so many words, Em and I were actually really close. He was like the brother I never had. Jasper was the same, only he was more of "the best friend."

After he left, I began to become anxious. Not just the messing with my fingers, fidgeting my legs kind of anxious. Eventually, I was full out pacing around the room. What to do, what to fucking do?

I was god dam clueless. I knew I didn't owe her anything, but at the same time, I felt like I did. I had done wrong by so many people, maybe it was time to do something right.

But was telling her really the right thing to do? Bringing her into this was bad, but at the same time, I felt like it's what I needed. Maybe, as predicted before, she'd be different. Maybe there was a reason that something inside me felt so strongly about telling her.

Call it intuition, but when something felt right to me, I usually stuck with it. Maybe it was time to finally tell someone. I mean, _really_ tell them. There were a lot of _maybe_sand _what if_'s that were possible, but against my better judgment, I flipped out my phone.

We had exchanged numbers earlier in the week, so I already had her number programmed into my phone, causing there to be no need to text Alice. I quickly punched in the letters.

_We need to talk._

I pushed the "send" button, hoping I'd get a response right away. I stood up, walked over to the closet and grabbed one of my hoodies and slid it on. I also put on my old, faded White Sox baseball hat. I would go crazy if I stayed in here any longer, so I figured if we were going to do this, the local park was as good a place as any.

It wasn't a long walk, only a couple of miles, so I decided there would be no need to take my car. I sighed – _my car_. I never got to use it; I was always keeping it undercover and a secret from them. If they identified me in it, I knew I'd never be able to drive it again.

Either way, it was a decent day outside. The sun was behind the clouds, but there wasn't any rain. I walked along the sidewalk, avoiding people with my hood up and hat hiding my face. Just like I always did when I went out in public.

It was like my disguise. If I wore it, I became invisible to the world. Sometimes I wondered what it'd be like to actually be _seen_. To be a real person.

My phone suddenly vibrated in my pocket. I quickly pulled it out, opening up the message to read it. Sure enough, it was from Bella.

_I'm coming._

She was coming? Already? Well damn, I had no idea she'd actually listen. I felt a little irresponsible for causing her to skip class, but shit, this was seriously important. Like, more important than anyone could ever imagine. I think she someone knew that.

_Meet me at the park. Wear sunglasses._

Just in case, I told myself. Just in case something bad would happen, and they wouldn't be able to recognize her. I'd never forgive myself for making the same mistake twice. The thought of what happened a year ago suddenly made me shiver.

It tore at the very center of my core, ripping me to pieces of the knowledge of what I had caused to happen. I battled the memory away though – I had done such a good job keeping it locked up, I wasn't about to slip now.

Fifteen minutes later, I arrived at the park. I walked over to a bench and waited. The park was vacant with the exception of a few couples walking around and holding hands. I ignored them; looking around for the red sports car I'd be seeing soon.

Sure enough, only a few minutes later, I saw it pull up and park at the curb. I watched as Bella got out, holding a small purse and wearing sunglasses like I had asked her. She swiftly walked over, heels clicking on the sidewalk.

I didn't look up as she sat down next to me. I wanted to wait for her response. "What's wrong?" Her tone seemed . . . irritated? I almost laughed. If only she knew.

"A lot of things," I responded in a dark tone, "But that's not the point at the moment." I added lightly.

I finally looked up to meet her eyes, and unsurprisingly, they were filled with curiosity. She crossed her legs and nodded for me to continue. I hesitated on how to phrase my next statement.

Finally, I let out a sigh. "My life is . . . complicated." I told her. "Actually, it's more than that, but you have to know something first." Her face suddenly looked like it was paying a lot more attention. She nodded once again. "I didn't _choose_ any of us. I didn't _plan_ for this shit to happen." I said in a harsh tone.

"Before you listen to any of it though, you have to understand this," I began, "There is no _happy ending_ to my story, and I doubt there ever will be. After I explain, you need to know that you are risking _everything _by spending any sort of time with me."

She gave me a doubtful look.

"I'm _serious_," I emphasized in a grim, hard tone. "This isn't a joke, and as of lately, my life's been more of a game than anything."

After I told her that, the doubt from her face vanished. Good – if she wasn't going to take me seriously, then I wasn't going to tell her. But as of now, it looked like she was, so I proceeded.

"Remember last night?" I questioned her, knowing she would. "Remember how I told you that it was a matter of life or death?" She nodded. "Well I wasn't lying. Last night, I had to pick Alice and you up because of what was after you. _Who_ was after you." I paused, "Well, _could_ have been. I'm not a hundred percent sure if it was you or I that they wanted. . ." I trailed off – I had begun to talk to myself.

By the look on her face, I could tell that I had lost her. At least so far this had been easier than I thought it would be. Honestly? I didn't think I'd make it this far before I fucking broke down.

"Can I give you the short story?" I asked, tilting my head slightly to the side. "The long one's going to take us all of the afternoon and probably into the night. Plus, it isn't exactly the best thing to hear before you go to bed, you know?"

She bit her lip and nodded, looking slightly nervous. I think it was my build-up words that were what scared her.

"Either way," I continued, my voice lowering. "It won't be easy for me to tell."

I wasn't sure why I was being so formal – I usually wasn't like this, and her non-responses were starting to make me uncomfortable. Maybe it'd help if she said at least _a_ word. At this point, I doubted she would.

I was about to begun when I remembered something. "Oh, and Bella?" Her eyes met mine and stayed locked there. "You can't tell anyone. I'm serious. This is a story that no one, not even my family knows."

Understanding and comprehension _finally_ swept over her face as she realized the meaning and warning behind my words.

"They're called the Volturi," I told her, my voice bleak. "They also go by _Chasse Mortelle_ – Death Chase." Her eyes widened but she remained silent. "There are three of them; Marcus, Caius, and Aro."

She nodded, registering the names in her mind, no doubt. "That's their last name, right? Volturi? She asked in a surprisingly calm voice.

I nodded, pausing for a moment. At first, I wasn't sure how I was supposed to continue this. I wanted to tell her all of the details and be thorough, but that involved telling the haunting story about what happened to my mother. I didn't want to bring that shit up – I really didn't.

I took a deep breath. There was only one way I could do it without all of the details, and that would probably leave her with many questions. Oh well; her answers would come in time.

"Long story short," I said in a tight voice, "They want revenge–"

"Revenge on _what_?" She asked in a flustered tone.

I gave her a long, hard stare, shaking my head regretfully as I silently let her know that she couldn't have that part yet.

Her face fell, and her eyes became pleading. For one fleeting moment, I almost told her the whole story. But I shook my head again. "No, Bella," I stated, my voice cold, "I just . . . can't."

". . . But . . .?" She went on quietly, her eyes wide with curiosity. Her stare became more pleading as the seconds ticked by.

"God damn it," I muttered quietly to myself for not being stronger, "It has to do with my mom, okay?" I finally spat out, crossing my arms and looking towards the sky. That was as good of answer she was going to get. I already told her that I couldn't say anything more on that.

"Oh." Her soft voice was immediately regretful. "I'm sorry." She said in an extremely apologetic tone.

I sighed, shaking my head. I wasn't mad at her – I was fucking pissed with myself. "Don't be," I told her, trying to soften my tone as well. It didn't exactly work. "I'd have a lot of questions if I were you too."

A thick silence between us hung in the air for a few moments. I finally continued on. "They want me dead," I said in a flat, lifeless voice. "For the past three years, they've wanted me dead."

I glanced up at her to see her reaction. Her eyes were thoughtful, and I could tell that this was a lot to take in for her. They were also horrified, as to be expected. She didn't say anything – Probably deciding it would be best if she didn't. I think she was right.

I was telling her nothing; only small, small pieces of the actual puzzle. At the same time though. I was telling her everything.

"Only the past year, it's become more about the people close to me," I gritted through my teeth, "Instead of me they want to kill, they want to get those close to me so that I can suffer even more before they eventually do kill me."

She gasped, her face completely shocked. "That's terrible!" She whispered loudly as her voice cracked. "Why–" She started to ask, but then remembered what I had told her before. The answers would come in time.

I could see it in her face – the hundred questions that she knew she was forbidden to ask. I also saw the longing; the longing to know the answers.

I shook my head, letting out a frustrated sigh. Suddenly, I just exploded. "It fucking sucks, Bella, okay?" I shouted, pounding on the bench with my fist. "Do you know how it feels to be locked inside every day, for fear of what's coming? For fear of death?" She slowly pulled off her sunglasses, revealing her hurt-filled eyes. "Do you know what it's like to be risking someone's life just because you're close to them? Just because they're _around _you?"

I rested my shoulders on my knees, burying my face in my hands. In an agonized whisper, I looked up and met her brown eyes. They were completely stunned. "Do you know what it's like . . .?" I whispered, my voice pained, "To never be able to love someone? To never be able to be loved?"

She didn't speak.

I wasn't sure if she understood that statement – I couldn't fully grasp it myself.

"I can't be close to anyone, because they will _die_ because of me. I can't become attached, because if they were to find the object of my desire, it'd be destroyed." I kept her gaze this whole time, somehow feeling comforted by the raw intensity of her stare.

"It sucks, Bella," I repeated in barely a whisper. "It fucking sucks."

Suddenly, I felt her small, warm hand wrap around mine. It was a gesture I hadn't been expecting, but at the same time, I knew I needed it. So I didn't push her away for once – I held her hand back. At the moment, it was exactly what I did need.

Everyone needed comfort sometimes.

Maybe that's what Bella was to me – My comfort. It seemed that every time she was around me, I wasn't as lonely. Somehow, I think she helped me in ways. Small ways though. The change was subtle, and I knew it, but I could slowly feel myself opening up to this girl.

I wasn't sure what it was about her, or even if it was under my control, but I felt myself losing the feeling of distance I tried so hard to put between myself and everyone.

Up until that point, Bella's face had been remotely calm about the whole thing. Sure, she had been surprised, but there hadn't been anything _that_ heightened. I felt as she shifted her weight besides me; her posture suddenly becoming tense.

"How much have you told them?" She whispered, knowing that I'd know who she was referring to.

"Enough." I responded flatly.

And then, it was like she finally _got_ it. Suddenly, her whole body was rigid. I knew that she finally understood how serious this was, and I waited – waiting for her reaction. She didn't say anything though, as she remained a stone at my side.

Her gaze fell upon something far off and out of focus, and I knew that whatever she was seeing was not the park before us. After a few minutes, when her eyes finally made their way back to mine, they had changed drastically.

They were oddly vulnerable, wide and glassed over, and completely masked off. I wasn't sure what she was thinking at the moment, because all I could concentrate on was her judgmental stare.

Blinking twice, she finally changed her posture – standing up and releasing my hand. I felt a small ache at the comfort I had lost as soon as she released, but tried not to think much of it. "I have to go." Her voice cracked.

And in one swift movement, she slid her shades back on; walking away and towards her car.

I didn't think badly of her as she drove away, knowing that I would probably have done the same thing. In a way, she had already become one of us. She had run away. Just like she should have – just like what I had wanted her to do; not to get herself involved.

Maybe that's what I wanted to happen all along. Maybe that's the reason why I told her all of this. For her to be scared; for her to realize what a bad influence it was on her life to be hanging out with this.

It's what I wanted all along. . .

I think.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Animal I Have Become – 3 Days Grace

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Chasse Mortelle – _"death chase"

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**Reviews are better than Edward's incredibly mysterious, confusing past.**


	5. Amis

**Sorry for not responding to anything lately.  
My computer's been effed up with viruses, and I've finally raided them all away.  
Yeah. No worries.**

**As Always, thank you to my fabulously incredible beta - ShadowWolf85  
Without him, the chapters would be ugly. 'Nuff said.**

**Well, not much else to say.  
Um...just review? Like always?  
I'd love that. :D**

**Oh, and happy late Thanksgiving!  
In case you haven't heard; I'm thankful for you all.  
Seriously I am.  
Okay - shutting up now.**

**--Justine(:**

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**Bella - Amis**

I shook my head once again, gripping on tightly to the steering wheel as I drove, intently watching the road ahead of me. I was overwhelmed, absolutely flabbergasted. I might have even been shaking a little bit.

I could have easily gone back to school – I hadn't been gone for over an hour. I wasn't sure my state-of-mind could take it at the moment, though, so I changed my direction to head back to the house.

I couldn't wrap my head around the devastating words Edward had told me not long ago. I couldn't, _and_ I didn't want to. I didn't want to believe them. How could something like that be true? How could something like that be forced upon anyone?

I remember the most frustrating thing about the whole conversation; the way he seemed so powerless, so vulnerable. Like he had already given up on any options he could attempt to escape his apparent fate. That was the part that had shocked me the most.

It was just the whole story in general, actually. Not just that, but the fact that there were a million questions that had gone unanswered to his dark past. There were a _b__illion_ things more that I wanted to know – needed to know – but had been too afraid to ask at the time. Not just too afraid, but also worried that we were both crossing some invisible line that the other had set up.

I knew that his telling me had been unusual, so I just let him talk. By asking him more, forcing pain from his memories, I knew that'd just be unfair.

As much as I had wanted to know more about him, taking advantage of him in his vulnerable state would have been down right cruel. It would have been cruel, because I know he would have answered.

For once, I was truly at a loss of words.

That's why I had to leave. I had panicked, and the next thing I knew, I had been driving away from him. How horrible. I had been practically begging him to tell me at least _something_ about his past, and when he finally did, I left him all alone afterwards. As if I could feel any more awful.

I didn't know what I was supposed to do, but at the same time, it felt like there was something I was _supposed_ to do. That I was _supposed_ to fix this. Call it crazy, but I really did believe that meeting the six was fate, and that fate was calling me to do something about all of the shit in their lives.

At least, that was the answer that made the most sense at the moment.

If there was one thing I was sure of, it was that I wasn't going to abandon any of them. Running away might have been something of an option for _them_, but it wasn't for me. I'd stick around – I'd do whatever I could. The only problem: Would Edward let me?

My mom's shiny, yellow Porsche sat in the driveway as I pulled in. I knew that using cramps and a headache as an excuse for coming home early wouldn't get her at all suspicious, so I wasn't worried.

I heard the TV on, coming from the living room where my mother presumably was. Paling up my face a bit, I stepped into the room where she was curled up with a blanket on the couch.

She didn't notice me at first – too observed by the apparently mesmerizing show currently on. When there was something on that she liked, you didn't bother her. Ever. I sighed, plopping myself into the leather chair next to the couch.

This time she noticed me, using TIVO to pause whatever it was she was watching.

"Hey, honey," She smiled happily, "What are you doing here?"

I probably could have told her that I just didn't feel like going to the rest of my classes; I knew she wouldn't have cared. But, I decided to stick with my story.

"Cramps." I explained in a believable grimace.

She quickly nodded in understanding, needing no further explanation. It was just how we girls worked.

Now that I was home, I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do. Sleep? No, I knew I wouldn't be able to get any. Clean the house? Sure, it'd keep me busy, but I wasn't exactly in the mood to do that either. Watch TV with my mom? That probably wouldn't be a good idea – my mother tended to be overly perceptive, and would start to notice too much after a while.

I could drive around the city? I did it often when my mind was too stressed and confused to do anything else. It seemed like the perfect idea, now that I thought about it. Because that's what I _really_ needed at the moment; some time to think with just the right amount of distractions so I wasn't over-analyzing things.

I got up off my chair, walking out of the room. "I'm going to run to the spa," I announced to Renee before I left, "I _really_ need it right now."

Her face scrunched up in sympathy, a small smile on her face. "Go ahead, Bells. You know where I'll be." I sent her a warn grin before leaving the room.

As I drove, I was thoughtful. Driving was definitely not helping as a distraction like I had planned. I sighed quietly to myself, wishing that life wasn't always this complicated.

There wasn't anyone I could talk to at the moment. Both Alice and Jasper were in school, where I _should_ have been. Emmett was probably around somewhere with his mother, but I was fairly certain that he wasn't the right person to spill myself to. Rosalie, even though I understood her now, was definitely not the person I wanted to go to. In fact, there wasn't anyone I could go to. Anyone other than Edward.

I had already thought over going to him again – Getting more answers, asking more questions. I wanted to so badly, but refused. I saw what it did to him when he spoke about his dark past. As greedy as I was, I was not heartless. I would not put him through such memories.

What was I suppose to do then?

Give him a card? Buy one of those cheesy ones with the cute font saying _'Everything Will Be Okay'_? A small smile filtered my lips as I quickly made the turn into our local grocery store. Maybe it wasn't the most appropriate way to approach the situation, but I had to let him know that I would be there for him.

I wondered if that was weird. Was it weird that I was already devoting myself at the expense of his comfort? That I wanted to help him in whatever way he needed?

No, I decided. It wasn't weird. There was so much bad in the world; so many good people who had been placed in the shittiest of situations. I wasn't one of them, but now that I knew people who were, I wanted to help.

The only question was – Would he let me help him?

I pulled into an empty parking space, hopping out and locking the doors of my car. Making my way into the store, I headed towards the cards aisle.

While I was looking down at my feet, still in deep thought, I bumped into someone. It was a man – the tall, broad frame of his large body knocked me backward a few steps and two hands reached out to my shoulders to steady me.

When we each mumbled our embarrassed apologies, we looked up to meet each other's eyes. Meeting the familiar brown eyes of my ex-boyfriend, unthinkingly, I took a few steps backward.

I regretted it the moment after I did it, because his eyes became unbelievable sad. Not just sad, but also defeated. They were defeated, as in the fact that he was surrendering to me. They told me that he would no longer be bothering me, or following me around.

Before words could escape my lips, he turned in the other direction, walking away from me.

As he walked away, his shoulders slumped, a pang of remorse filled me. I realized in that moment, that after our break-up, I had been acting like a complete child this whole time. How absurd – walking around and throwing fucking fits when all he wanted to do was to make things better.

"Jake!" I called after him, breaking into a jog so that I could catch up to his long strides.

When I caught up, he hesitated for a moment, his back still facing me. I heard him take a big sigh before finally turning to face me. "Bella." He stated, his voice flat.

"Jake. . ." I began, biting my lip with uncertainty at how to began. I knew that this was the conversation we had been needing for a long time, and that things needed to be said. So instead, I stalled. "What are you doing here?"

He rose an eyebrow an eyebrow at me, skeptical. "This is my free period, and I was picking up groceries for the party at Mike's tomorrow. What are _you_ doing here?"

Oh. I did remember Mike mentioning to me something about a party. I nodded slowly nodded, impressed with the progress of how our conversation was going.

You know, once you got passed the fucking awkwardness of the actual situation, everything felt normal. Too bad that said awkwardness was unavoidable.

"Just buying a card. . ." I trailed off, unthinkingly. Why was I tell him this?

He raised an eyebrow. "A card?"

I nodded, starting to question my own sanity. No one ever gave anyone cards anymore. I thought about that for a moment; Maybe that's why I was doing it in the first place.

For hopes of a smile in devastatingly hard times.

"For who?" He asked, badgering information that was useless to him out of me. Why did it matter to him anyways? It was none of his business. The bitch in me was telling me to tell him to go and screw himself. The rational side of me was telling me to be nice. Damn rational side.

"A friend," I answered simply, starting to walk slowly towards the cards section once again. Just as I predicted, he followed my steps, holding my gaze with his questioning eyes. I got lost in them – they were still just as pretty as they were when we were going out.

What the hell was I talking about?

"A friend?" He rose an eyebrow once again. Typical Jake Moves 101: Eyebrow raising really was number one. I had never noticed until now how much that _seriously_ pissed me off. Like a lot.

"Yeah," I mumbled distractedly as I began my search, browsing through different categories. And because I knew he would ask, I went into further explanation. "He's going through some tough times. . .it's kinda like a get well card." But not really.

When I glanced at him from the corner of my eye he seemed thoughtful. His arms were crossed and his brows were furrowed. I didn't pay much attention to him though.

I finally spotted a card that stood out to me. I pulled it off the shelf, studying it. In big, bold, simple black and white letters on the front, the dictionary definition of _friend_ was printed on the outside.

_**Friend**__** (frēond) n.  
**_1. a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard._  
_2.a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter  
3. someone who's there for you

Already knowing that this was just what I needed, I opened it up, reading the inside. There was a simple message with plain black print, just like the front. It read:

_I'll always be there for you when you need me._

Smiling, I shoot the card, picking out a matching envelope to go with it. I knew that what I was doing was dumb, and probably even childish, but I didn't care. Something inside of me told me that this was what he needed.

Completely forgetting about Jake, he cleared his throat, brining me out of my trance. "Oh," I quickly muttered, "Sorry about that." Not being able to help it, I even blushed a little. That meant nothing though – I blushed at everything.

"Bella," He started in an exasperated sigh. I expected him to say more. In fact, I was positive he would. So I waited.

But he never did.

Instead, with sad eyes, he leaned down, placing a light kiss on my forehead before silently walking away. I stared after him in awe, completely shocked at what I had just witnessed. Intuition burst through me as I realized how hard I had been on him lately, and what it probably was doing to him.

I felt awful; absolutely horrible.

I stood there for about a minute, not moving. I didn't want Jake to be my boyfriend again, I was sure of that. Couldn't we just be friends? That would be perfect – he'd be a great friend, and I knew it. The question was, could either of us handle that? Handle hanging out together with the memory of that _something_ we once shared.

We hadn't been in love, or at least I hadn't, but he had always been a good guy. I didn't even know what to do anymore. Much like everything in my life – Things were spinning out of control.

My phone vibrated from my pocket. I pulled it out as the screen revealed a text message from Jacob. Five words were all that appeared on the screen. Five words that were enough to completely make my day even shittier.

_I won't bother you anymore._

I needed an aspirin. My legs felt like they were about to give out. Too many problems were beginning to form, and even though I had convinced myself that I could handle them, I knew that I couldn't.

I knew that I was in _way_ over my head.

I suddenly was feeling very dizzy. My initial plans had been to buy the card, then bring it to him at the park, where I knew he still would be. I knew that was no longer a good idea. I was suddenly overwhelmed by the weight of the world, crashing down on my shoulders. Or at least, that's what it felt like.

It was just too much to deal with right now. I wasn't ready to face what I had set myself up for. I did my best remaining stable on my feet as I walked to the check-out counter, paid for my card, and got in my car.

Narrowly avoiding several different accidents while in my state of complete shock. Too many emotions were bubbling around in my head at the moment, and I just couldn't take it. I couldn't face any of them at the moment.

So as soon as I arrived at home again, without a word to my mother, I ran straight up to my bed room, crashing in the middle of my over-sized pillows. Immediately I was dragged into the nap I desperately needed. For just a moment, I could let my thoughts wonder to happy places – far away from the hell I had just discovered.

A while later I was awoken by the vibration of my phone against the soft sheets. I quickly answered it, not even bothering to check and see who it was.

"Hello?" My voice cracked from sleep.

"Bells?" My dad asked on the other line, "Why does your voice sound funny?" My dad was paranoid, being all superior in his kick-ass policing skills, so anything even the slightest bit out of place, he'd have to question.

I cleared my throat a little. "I was taking a nap," I explained, yawning and sitting up. Whatever the hell I had been feeling before was gone now. Thank _God_. I felt at ease now, and more relaxed.

I heard his quiet chuckles on the other end. "My girl's always the life of the party." He joked. I rolled my eyes, slowly began to become more awake.

"What'd you need, dad?" I asked him, my tone curious.

"Oh, that's right," He laughed to himself nervously. My dad – always the awkward one. "See, Bells, I was wondering. . ." He began hesitantly.

"Spit it out, old man," I teased, giggling.

"Well, I was wondering if maybe you could, you know, disappear for the night?" I waited for an explanation before saying anything. "See, your mother and I haven't had the chance to a night alone in a while because of our busy schedules, so yeah. . ."

I laughed, nodding in understanding. "Say no more, dad. I'm outta here in a bit anyways." Besides, I had a card I needed to give to someone.

"Bella," He sighed happily, "You are a lifesaver, honey."

"I know." I beamed proudly despite the fact that he couldn't see it. "Dinner and a movie, right?" I questioned, happy that they were getting some actual couple time. Dinner and a movie at our house usually meant an elaborate meal cooked by Laurent, and whatever was new on Netflix.

Yes – we Swan's did lead an exciting life.

"That's right," He confirmed happily.

"Well, dad," I told him, wrapping up the conversation. "I better get going over to Jess's place. . ." I lied smoothly.

"Alright, you do that, Bells. Love you."

"Love you too," I closed the phone, feeling way more guilty than necessary.

I hated lying to my parents about where I was going lately. We were all so close, and lying to them absolutely killed me. At the same time though, I couldn't see any other way around it. I wasn't quite ready for them to know about my new friends. Plus, if my dad found out about Edward, he would flip a tit and most definitely involve way too many people.

That's how it should happen, but I knew that that's not what Edward wanted. He had specifically told me not to tell anyone, and being such a forbidden secret, I promised myself that I would not let him down my sharing it with others.

Maybe in time I'd convince him to tell someone, but not now. Plus, I didn't even have enough information to involve Charlie yet. Although something tells me that Edward may have already tried involving the police once or twice.

I got off my bed and walked over to my mirror. Doing quick touch-ups on my mascara and combing through my curls, I grabbed my keys, purse, and card and headed for the door.

"I'm going to Jess's!" I yelled to my mom on my way out, not giving her any time to respond to my suspicious behavior. After all, I had just told her I was sick no more than a couple of hours ago.

Oh well. I guess you just had to do what you had to do.

I decided to pick-up some Chinese take-out for all of them; because, you know, everybody loves some good Chinese take-out here and there. Plus it was getting close to dinner time, and I was hungry as well. A win/win situation, really.

As I was driving, a thought occurred in my head. What if Edward absolutely hated me now? After I had completely ran away from what he had told me, _I_ would have hated me too. In fact, the more and more I thought about what I did, the more and more ashamed I felt. I was a fucking coward. How insanely idiotic I had been. What poor judgment I had had on my part.

I kept the internal string of insults going as I pulled into the drive through. I was a bitch, I chanted in my head repeatedly, a heartless bitch.

My thoughts were so cluttered lately, I was beginning to give _myself_ a headache.

"What would you like today, ma'am?" A polite college kid smiled at me, a hopeful look in his eyes. I wasn't sure exactly what he was expecting, so I ignored his subtle flirting, as I usually did, and just simply gave him my ridiculously large order.

Five minutes later, I pulled out of the parking lot. I waited impatiently at numerous traffic lights while the aroma of sesame chicken over-took the car. It was the middle of rush hour, and a horrible time to be driving. For the sixth time in the last two minutes, I honked my horn loudly, sighing as I slid into my seat, preparing for a long wait.

After what seemed like forever, I turned down the familiar alley, parking a few yards from the door. I reached over to the passenger seat, grabbing my five bags of delicious food.

I wasn't sure why I was so nervous when I knocked on the door. Okay, I was lying to myself if I didn't admit that I was really worried about what Edward's reaction of seeing me would be. Before the door opened, I braced myself for a night of cold glares directed at me.

Emmett swung the door open. The moment he saw it was me, he pulled me into a bear-hug tight embrace, almost cracking my spine. "Hey, short-stuff!" He grinned happily, "Good to see you here."

I laughed. "I come with offerings," I made my voice sound sacred as I bowed my head and held up the bags of Chinese wonderfulness. I couldn't keep a straight face as his eyes lit up though. He eagerly gestured me inside as his hungry eyes followed the plastic bags in my hands.

Being subtle about it, I glanced around the room to find all six of them in their usual places. Alice was on the couch with Jasper; Rosalie was in her circular chair; Emmett was standing by my side, waiting for me to give up the food, and Edward was spread out on his futon. I wasn't surprised to find a notebook in his hand, like usual.

I held my gaze on him just a split second longer than the others, hoping for some sort of acknowledgement from him. It never came though, just as I knew it wouldn't. He didn't even look up from what he was doing – his eyes staying glued to the paper as if I had entered the room at all.

It stung, but I had been expecting it. _This is your own fault, Bella,_ I reminded myself.

"Bella," Alice grinned waving, not moving from her comfortable position of Jasper's casual embrace.

I set down and unwrapped the bags on the coffee table, revealing cartons of noodles; trays of egg rolls, buckets of rice, and of course, an endless supply of chicken.

Emmett, hovering over me like a hawk, was the first one to dive in. Everyone followed after, except Edward. He remained silent in the corner, writing. I bit my lip with curiosity, as always when I saw him write in his notebook, but I managed to beat back the question.

Instead, once everyone had gotten their food and were making a mess eating it all over the furniture, I made a plate for him. He could pretend I didn't exist as much as he wanted to, but he couldn't avoid me. It was just how I was – I didn't take no for an answer.

My father called it a good quality.

Other's called it a bitchy tendency.

Myself; I liked to think of it as a little of both. Either way, I quietly made my way over to where he was lounging – that old, worn-out futon of his. Lately, I had been really itching to buy him a brand new one. Though, something in me said that he wouldn't exactly care for that very much.

I sat down next to him, close, but at the same time giving him some distance. "Hi." I whispered. He finally looked up at me, but without any sort of an expression. I gulped, "I brought you some food. . ." I trailed off, carefully handing him the plate I had put together.

He stared at it for a few moments, and I half considered just getting up and leaving. Clearly he didn't want me here. Just as I was about to get up and go somewhere else, he took the plate from my hands. "Thanks." I heard him mutter after breaking my gaze and moving it to the food.

"No problem," I mumbled, awkwardly sitting there – wondering what to do next.

I wanted to apologize for early that day; for running away when it was completely uncalled for. I wasn't sure if I could right now though. I mean, everyone could easily over hear something they weren't supposed to.

I decided that it was worth the risk. Turning my body to face him completely, I leaned a little closer to him so that I could talk quieter.

"I'm sorry for before, Edward," I said, my tone remorseful. "I'm so, so sorry. I don't. . .I don't know what happened, I kind of just–"

His stare cut me off. "Sorry for what?" He asked, his tone equally quiet. I knew it was unintentional, but his voice sounded entirely too sexy when he spoke that soft. I tried to ignore his piercing green eyes as well.

"For, uh. . ." I paused, really taking the time to focus on the details of his features. "running away." There was something different about his face than there was when I talked to him earlier that day.

"Bella." He stated in a gentle voice, "You have nothing to apologize for. Please don't."

He sounded so. . .tortured. Like he felt he was responsible for carrying the weight of the world around on his shoulders. He sounded like all those years of burdens were finally starting to set in. It hurt to see. It hurt to hear.

I don't know why, but much like every time I knew he was somehow in pain, I tried to comfort him. I was never sure if my efforts paid off, but he never seemed to protest when I tried.

With the hand he wasn't using to eat, I encircled it with both of my own. It was so _warm_. And soft. It was like the Edward underneath all of those layers of cold and bitterness. I enjoyed the feeling. Probably more than I should have been.

I wasn't worried about anyone seeing – I knew that no one was paying attention to us at the moment; each wrapped up in their own, private conversations with each other.

Edward remained silent next to me, but that was only because there was nothing to say. Nothing needed to be said in that moment. Just like all of the other times I had reached out to try and take away his pain – neither of us ever spoke. There was a silent explanation we both seemed to know. One which didn't need to be said.

The minutes on the clock gradually ticked by in a comfortable pace. I could practically feel Edward's mood change as I held onto his hand. I glanced at him a couple of times, and when our eyes met, his expression became softer each time.

Eventually, I decided to give him my card. I let go of his hand. I wasn't sure if I even heard it, but I thought I heard a quiet sigh escape his mouth. Reaching into my purse, I pulled it out and handed it to him. The look of confusion on his face was absolutely priceless.

He studied the front of it, and then opened it up. Quietly to himself, I heard him murmur what I had written. "I promise I won't let you down – no matter what. I promise I will always be there for you, Edward. Sincerely, B."

And then, in a quiet whisper, he read the last line I had written. "Amis." God, it sounded _so_ much better when he said it than when I tried saying it. Judging by his expression, at least I knew I got the word right. I mean, you could never trust those damn iPod translator apps.

I took hold of his hand once again. "Friends."

Just like what I had been wanting to see all along, a ghost of a smile spread across his lips. I couldn't help myself – I smiled so widely, I thought my face might break. Squeezing his hand, I stared into his green eyes, and knew that I was _finally_ getting somewhere.

I felt time slip by as we sat on his futon together. Never once did he take out his notebook again, or say anything else. For the past hour and a half, we had all been watching an old movie showing on cable. I clung onto his hand the whole time.

After the movie finished, plans for the night were made.

Jasper wrapped an arm around Alice as they both stood up. "I think we'll stay at my place tonight, Ed." He nodded to Edward, oblivious to the hand holding.

"Okay," Edward said, nodding back.

"Yo, Eddie," Emmett yawned from the other side of the room, on the floor next to Rose's chair. "I'll crash here, if that's alright. Mom's at an over-night clinic, so she won't be needin' me." He informed us happily.

"I'll stay tonight too," Rosalie stated, not bothering to even look in our direction.

"Alright," Edward commended, "You guys know where everything is." I heard a slight smile in his voice, though I wasn't sure why.

I could tell everyone was about to get ready for bed. I was about to get up myself when an idea struck me. I thought about it for a moment – would it be weird? _I_ didn't think so. I mean, we _were_ friends. . .right?

"Can I stay here tonight?" I asked in a quiet voice, turning to Edward.

He furrowed his brows. "Why?" He didn't sound appalled to the idea; just confused.

I couldn't really come up with a good answer for him, so I just shrugged. Hell, I didn't even know why I wanted to stay so badly. With a small smile, he shrugged back. I grinned, "Thanks."

I hadn't even thought about staying before I left my house, so I didn't bring any clothes for tomorrow. That wasn't a big problem though – I could just leave early and get dressed at home. Problem solved. Because I was positive that I'd be able to manage in my Victoria's Secret sweatpants I was currently wearing. Perfect.

Two hours later, we were still on the futon, but we both had adjusted ourselves into a more comfortable position. Edward lay lazily spread out across it; his arms behind his back as his head stayed propped up on his pillow. I sat on his feet in a half-Indian position with one leg curled up while the other swung lazily over the edge. My head was resting against the back, comfortably snuggled into the soft fabric.

"Least favorite animal?" I asked in the middle of a deep yawn. We had been going at this for hours – asking each other every possible question there was. Literally.

He grimaced, pursing his lips. "Cats," He finally responded, his voice also extremely exhausted.

I suppressed a quiet chuckle. It probably had to do with my sleep-deprived state, but for some reason, his answer amused me. Yawning once again, I asked, "Why?" Of all the questions we had asked each other, so far, some of them were very depressing. I tried to stay in as light of topics as I could, but for some reason, many things upset him.

"Because," He chuckled sleepily, "They're annoying as hell." By the way our voices were – slurred and barely comprehensive – a third party observer would probably come to the conclusion that we were drunk. Nope, not drunk. Tired? Yes. Definitely tired.

I laughed out loud for no particular reason. My mind was completely out of it, and I could barely understand a normal conversation. Let alone, try and comprehend big words. It was getting difficult to keep my eyes open, and I knew that I would be crashing soon.

"Your turn," I yawned.

"Okay," He proceeded, sounding amused at something. "What's your favorite milkshake flavor?" The questions were getting more random by the second.

Both bemused and entertained by his question, I giggled quietly. "Chocolate," I answered simply, then added, "You gotta love the classics."

He nodded, yawning for the billionth time that night. I wondered if he was as tired as me. Unfortunately, pondering on the subject of sleep had a greater affect on me than I was originally planning.

Without thinking, I felt my head slowly fall to his chest, and I felt my legs spread out over the top of his legs; tangling my feet with his as I – half-asleep – made myself comfortable.

Once my eyes fluttered shut, I was unable to open them again. Too tired to care what Edward's reaction would be with this new position, I let myself fall into the deep sleep I desperately needed. Right before my mind drifted, or maybe I was already asleep, I could have sworn I heard the soft, gentle voice of an angel.

"Goodnight, Bella."

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CHAPTER SONG:** Earthquake - The Used

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FRENCH TRANSLATION:** _Amis - _"Friends"

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**Reviews are better than chocolate milkshakes.**


	6. S'en Aller

**I'm debating on getting a twitter.  
Pretty sure my only fear is that no one will follow me. xD**

**Anywho.  
As always, lots of love in everyone's direction.  
You all are wonderful. Just wonderful.  
I live on your support.  
Thank you.**

**Oh, and shout-to my wonderful beta, _ShadowWolf85_  
**

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**Edward - S'en Aller**

I felt myself wake up, but refused to open my eyes just yet. I hoping for just a few more minutes of sleep. I adjusted myself further into the softness of the futon, and it took me less than a second to do a double-take. I was hugging warmth and warmth was hugging _me_.

I fluttered my eyes open, looking at what was on top of me. _Who_ was on top of me. _Oh yeah_. In my sleeping state, my arms had somehow found a way into a tight embrace around Bella's tiny body. It wasn't just that though; her arms had also wrapped themselves tightly around my torso.

It took me a few long moments to remember how this had happened. I had been talking to Bella last night, and far into the morning. We had talked for hours straight. I remembered barely being able to keep my eyes open, and same with her. I faintly remember her collapsing onto my chest, because I had fallen asleep right after.

That didn't matter though. The only thing that mattered _now_ was the position we were in. Had we crossed a line last night? I knew this was wrong, but why on earth did it feel so _right_? I knew I should let go of her, but how come my arms wouldn't let me?

I wanted to avoid her, but how come I couldn't?

Last night, Bella broke through my carefully constructed walls, as usual. She never failed to see through me. I loved her for it. I hated her for it. It was damn hard to try and stay away when I didn't have the strength to push her away in the first place.

It was impossible for me to resist the incredibly comforting gestures she continued to make. She knew when I needed to be comforted; she knew when I was feeling broken. I wasn't sure how, but she knew.

I wasn't frustrated with her… I was frustrated with myself. I should be able to be stronger. In fact, I could easily manage to try harder. But I didn't want to. I was beginning to crave her company. I was beginning to crave _her_. Far too much.

This needed to stop now.

Reluctantly, I finally unwrapped my arms from around her. She remained sound asleep – her head snuggling itself into my chest as she continued her soft breaths, in sync with mine. As I breathed in and out, she gently rose and fell with each movement my lungs made.

Now that I had the chance to really look at her, I could really grasp and appreciate how beautiful she truly was. I had always considered her hot, fucking sexy as hell But now, as she molded herself into my body, it was clear that she was much more than merely pretty.

_She was beautiful_.

God, why was she constantly taking over my thoughts all of the time? It was insane – It's like destiny brought her to me, and the devil himself instructed her to flaunt her perfection in front of me, just so that my life could be even worse than the hell it already was. Everyday she came here, taunting me, torturing me to the point of insanity.

I wanted something I couldn't have. I realized now that I wanted it _badly_. Why were the best things in life always forbidden?

What was even worse was that I was growing to like her. Too much. It had been better before, because I hadn't been sure what I was missing out on. I hadn't really _known_ her at all. Three hours of non-stop conversation completely changed that though. And now, now that I knew every little detail, it absolutely killed me. It killed me because I couldn't _have_ her. She would never be mine.

I felt her shiver on top of me. Without thinking, I wrapped my arms around her again. Well damn. This clearly wasn't going to work. Body contact wasn't exactly the ideal way to stop myself from falling for her.

I was putting my foot down. . .

After today.

She felt way too warm to push away now. I obviously didn't want her to get cold either, and seeing as in there were no blankets around, I knew that I was her only option. See, that was it. I was just being a gentleman. Nothing more.

_Yeah right_. I rolled my eyes at my attempts of denial. Who was I kidding, myself? My craving to not be alone was turning into an obsession.  
That had been a very bad move on my part. I had shut myself off for too long, and held everything in. On the edge of explosion, I finally broke down and told someone. Poor Bella. If I didn't try and stop myself soon, I'd start becoming dependent on her.

I would end up pouring every ounce of my soul into her, just so that I could have somebody to talk to. Just so that I could have someone who finally _knew_. As tempting as the idea was, I knew that it would never work.

Because if I became too dependent on her, one day, she wouldn't be there when I needed her.  
And I would be broken again.

I knew it was better to get myself accustomed to the pain, as always, and deal with it gradually, day by day. Better than being happy for once, and all of a sudden having something horrible happen. Causing the pain to crash over me in violent waves.

It was already the mistake I had made _four _times. With Alice, Emmett, Jazz, and Rose. I loved them, because I had let myself get attached. If something happened to them, I'd die. They were my family.

I mean, what if I allowed myself to love Bella at one point? What if she got thrown into the game of chance and something happened to _her_. I couldn't even imagine.

I wanted to mentally yell at myself for thinking into all of this too much, but then I realized that this wasn't unusual; It was just my life. My life really _did_ involve that much planning and analyzing of the future. Because one tiny mistake on my part, and someone could die.

In that moment, Bella shifted in my arms. I could tell that she was waking up, because her breathing had changed. I quickly fell into a phony slumber, not wanting her to know I had been awake for awhile, undoubtedly making me the pervert for watching her sleep. Yeah. That title didn't exactly fit to my name. Edward "The Pervert" Cullen. I wanted to gag just thinking about it.

I hadn't even been watching her sleep though. Just enjoying the hospitality of her soft body. Oh shit. That _did_ make me a perv, didn't it? Fuck it, I honestly couldn't care less. I had been called worse, after all.

I felt her raise her head off of my chest for a few seconds, and I knew that she was looking around. Probably having the similar thoughts I had when I first woke up, as well. Expecting her to get off of me, she surprised me when her head found its place on my chest once again.

I stayed frozen, and she remained oblivious to the fact that I was awake. More minutes ticked by as our arms remained around each other. I was positive that she was still awake. What was she doing?

I wanted so badly to know what she was thinking.

After another few minutes passed, she carefully sat up on me, thinking I was still asleep. I had to suppress a smile at her attempts of being conspicuous. I listened to her quiet footsteps until they disappeared, than heard the door to the bathroom gently close.

As soon as I heard the door close, I sat up. I knew Em and Rose would still be asleep for a couple more hours, which was good; If either of those two didn't get enough beauty sleep, I was the one stuck listening to them bitch about it all day.

I walked over to the counter. It was only there because this place used to be some sort of store. I didn't mind though, because all of the drawers and cupboards provided plenty of space for me to stash my shit. I dug around in my cereal cupboard for some Captain Crunch – as I had discovered last to be Bella's favorite cereal. Turns out, it was mine too. Because God knows that shit is _addicting_.

Not thinking too much into it, I poured us each a bowl, figuring it wasn't weird. I mean, she had stayed over night here twice. I was pretty sure we were past all of the awkward obstacles.

I didn't even feel ashamed about the fact that this was my home. I may have been at first, but not anymore. Now that I figured out that Bella wasn't a bitch who cared about what others had, I could act however the hell I wanted.

The fact that Bella's family had more money than Jesus didn't even bother me any more. After last night, I had learned to accept that. Come to think of it, I had learned to accept a _lot_ of things last night. . .

"Morning," Bella smiled cheerfully as she walked in the room. I sat down on one of the stools and gestured towards her bowl. Once she realized what was in the bowl, her face was priceless. Her eyes lit up like a kid's on fucking Christmas. I couldn't help but smile.

How odd. I hadn't felt like this when I woke up in a _long_ time.

"Good morning," I chuckled back as she hurried over to take her seat next to me. Like a child, she began swinging back and forth as she continuously shoved spoonfuls of cereal into her mouth. I couldn't even watch her – I knew I wouldn't be able to hold in my laughter.

Bella didn't even strike me as a morning person, but then again, when had I ever been right about her before? She never failed to surprise me, that was for sure.

We ate in silence; neither of us bringing up the night before. I didn't say anything about our sleeping arrangements, and neither did she. I was glad about that, actually. I really wanted to keep things at the neutral level they were, and _not_ make shit awkward. So far, I felt like I was really maintaining that.

Once we were both finished, I stood up, carrying our empty bowls over to set into the sink. I'd get to them later; I had nothing but precious time on my hands – just like always.

Bella yawned, stretching her arms above her head. "I should get home," she stated, "I still have to get ready for school."

I nodded, holding in my disappointment. There goes my company for the day, I sighed internally.

Right before she was about to open the door, I stopped her. "Wait, Bella," I said, my voice relatively calm. She turned around to face me once again. "You don't have to be afraid," I told her in an even quieter voice.

She raised an eyebrow. "Of what?"

"The Volturi," I couldn't help but grimace as I said their name. Volturi should have been some French curse word. I would have liked it better that way.

"Really?" She gave me a skeptical look, crossing her arms and leaning her body against the door frame. "Because last I heard, they were trying to kill you. No worries? Fine, sure." The sarcasm in her voice was thick.

"I can take care of myself," I assured her – my voice coming out a little too sharp than I intended. "I was referring to _you_. _You_ don't have to worry about them, okay? They won't hurt you."

She looked doubtful, her brown eyes looking for a further explanation.

I sighed. "So far, we've been doing a pretty good job of remaining conspicuous," I explained, "They don't know where I live, as well as the others. I'm pretty positive that they don't even recognize Rose, Em, Jazz, or even Al. Whenever they're hunting, I just try and make sure that they won't find you _as a precaution_." Realization slowly spread across her face. "They've probably seen every body once or twice; quick glimpses, I suppose, but never long enough for them to remember. It's just a precaution."

I wasn't sure if she found that fact disturbing, or comforting. Her face was extremely difficult to read. She just stared at me for a few moments. Finally, she sighed. "Okay," she accepted, before pausing with hesitance. She bit her lip and looked down. "Will you just try and be careful?"

When our eyes locked, there was genuine concern in them. I was touched. Just like when she had given me the card yesterday. I mean, it was the last thing I was expecting to receive; no gave people cards anymore, and I think that's why she did it. It was amusing, and at the same time, extremely comforting. Just a perfect combination of what I needed.

I nodded, my voice cracking. "I will."

An emotion I didn't recognize touched her eyes, and with that, she smiled and walked out the door.

_She would be the death of me, I swear_.

If the Volturi didn't end up doing the job, I knew she'd get it done soon enough. I smirked to myself at the mere thought of Bella trying to kill someone. I couldn't even see her being able to throw a punch.

With that thought, I quietly walked to my room – retrieving my notebook and walking back out to the couch. I reached for a pen on the table, realizing how much writing needed to be done. . .

I was lost.

**Bella**

As I drove away, I felt extremely better than when I had first came last night. I had learned so much about Edward that I never expected to hear from him. I hoped to God that all of the information he had given me would somehow help me fix this whole mess, and save him from hell.

As much as he didn't want to admit it to me or himself, I knew that he wanted to be saved; almost as much as I wanted to save him.

It wasn't just him though – It was all of them. Poor Alice, the optimistic one who lived life everyday telling herself that everything was okay, even though she knew it wasn't. Jasper, having to deal with the struggles and hardships his disorder brought, along with trying to help support his mother. Rosalie – trying to show everyone how brave she was by doing what she did and trying to save her dad, when the fact was, the poor girl was scared to death. And then there was Emmett. Emmett, having to take care of his alcoholic mother constantly, while also having to watch Rose suffer everyday. Even if he didn't realize it himself, he was crazy about her.

I thought about my own life, and realized how pathetic it really was. I didn't have to sleep with men in order to keep my father alive. I didn't have to be at my mother's aid 24/7 so that she wouldn't do anything foolish. I didn't have to suffer at being shuffled around from orphanage to orphanage, and the fact that I never had real parents. I never had to worry about loosing myself, and not having control of my actions.

I didn't have to go through everyday, not knowing if I would make it through the end of it or not.

I didn't have any problems and yet, it suddenly felt like the weight of the world was crashing down on my shoulders. I didn't mind, though. In fact, it was the only thing keeping me sane at the moment.

Because having the knowledge that I led a perfect life, while others were suffering unconditionally, just made me sick to my stomach.

Trying not to think about that too much as I pulled into my long driveway, I pushed the thoughts from my head. Not easily though, because no matter how hard I tried not to think about them, they were still _there_. You couldn't just _avoid_ something like this.

Once inside my house, I headed for my room to shower and get ready. I walked past the kitchen and spotted Renee cooking up something. "Hey, honey!" She waved as I peeked in the room, "How was Jess's?"

"Fine," I lied.

"Well that's good," She was too observed in her cooking to care, one way or the other.

Excusing myself from having to lie further, I left her to her baking. I walked past Laurent, busy vacuuming the grand staircase while humming show tunes over the loud roar of the vacuum. I greeted him happily as I walked by.

I took a fast shower, dried and curled my hair, then quickly applied a light coat of make-up. As I finished, I glanced at the clock. Sighing to myself, I grabbed my things and headed for my car once again. I guess it couldn't hurt to get to school early for once. Besides, I think I needed the distraction.

When I arrived, I had a short conversation with Angela in the parking lot about our big English essay due in a couple of days. I hadn't talked to her in a while, and it felt nice to catch up again. I forgot how extremely kind she was; the complete opposite of Jess. I took mental note that next time I needed something to do, I'd ask Angela.

Right before the bell rang, I took a seat in my Biology class. It was movie day – we were watching something about onion roots and cells for the whole hour. So needless to say, once the lights were out, my mind was free to wander wherever it pleased.

. . .Maybe that wasn't such a good thing, actually.

When I had woken up this morning, I had found myself in a very _comfortable_ position with Edward. All I could think about was the way he had been holding me. Granted, he hadn't actually _realized_ he was, seeing as in you couldn't control what you did in your sleep, but still. On purpose or not, the gesture was beginning to go to my head.

I knew I was being stupid though. I mean, he probably didn't even get the chance to analyze our embrace, because I had woken up before him. I sighed quietly to myself. Why was I being such a _girl_?

I wondered silently at what I would do this weekend. It was Friday, and as Jake had reminded me yesterday, Mike was having a party tonight. For some reason, I wasn't in the mood. It was so _un _Bella, it almost scared me. What was happening to me lately?

I decided that maybe I'd stop in and say hi for a little bit. I mean, Mike was my friend. He'd be upset if I didn't make my presence known for at least a _little_ while.

My mom was leaving tonight for some weekend trip with my aunt Shelly. A short, Alaskan cruise, I remembered her mentioning the other day. I was tempted to tag along. I was fairly positive that I needed a break from all of my hectic thoughts at the moment.

Charlie would most likely be busy all weekend as well, so any plans of father and daughter bonding would not work out. I suppose I could do something with Angela? Yeah, that'd be fun. . .

Oh, who the hell was I kidding myself?

I wanted to make plans with Alice, or Emmett, or even Jazz. Hell, maybe even all five of them. Though I was pretty sure that "fun" wasn't exactly a word Edward was very often associated with. I wished there was someone way I could change that. I had a feeling it was kind of a useless effort, though. He denied any sort of help he was offered.

I mentally added stubborn on a list describing his personality traits. Why was it so difficult for him to accept the fact that some people actually wanted to help him? It was frustrating, really.

As the day dragged on, I eventually made my way to the cafeteria. After buying a salad and some fruit, I found my place at our usual table. Jess was already there, of course, and chatting up a storm with Kate about some new vampire movie coming out. I rolled my eyes and silently sat down.

"Bella!" Jess exclaimed as soon as she noticed me.

"Hey Jess," I grinned, trying to show enthusiasm which unfortunately didn't exist in the first place. "Hi Kate." As others began filling up the seats around us, I ate my salad in silence.

I kept my eyes focused on the small, red cherry tomato in the middle of my bowl. It took me a few minutes to realize that Jessica had been calling my name. For a while. "Bella?" She sounded exasperated. I looked up to meet her eyes. "Oh, _finally_!" She sighed, shaking her head. "What is _with _you lately, doll face?"

My expression remained completely emotionless. "Nothing," I answered simply. "Nothing is wrong. What do you mean?"

"_Bella_," She sighed once again, placing a hand on my shoulder. "I know you better than you think. This isn't usual Bella behavior. You haven't said one word, and you haven't taken your eyes off of that damn salad." She paused, sounding pleased with her conclusion. "Something's up."

Why, oh why did she pick _now_ to actually pay attention and have a real conversation? "I'm fine," I snapped, my voice coming out more defensive than planned.

Her attitude remained unabashed though, and she shrugged. "Whatever. Don't tell me. That's cool." She didn't sound mad, just surprised. It wasn't like this was new though. It wasn't like I spent all of my time sharing all of my personal details with her. I sat through the rest of lunch, keeping to myself.

Two hours later I was walking out to the parking lot. Anxious to get home, I avoided any casual conversation on the way. Unfortunately, my plan was not successful. Once again, Jess began getting in my face.

"Seriously, Bella," she snapped her gum, "Where have you been lately? We haven't hung out in forever, you're never at any parties, and you haven't been talking to anyone."

Wow. I didn't even realize that my new friends had made me _that_ anti-social. I made a promise to myself to put more effort in being less obvious. "Sorry," I mumbled as I fiddled for my keys when I arrived at my car. "I guess I've just had a lot of school work. . ."

Lucky for me, that excuse worked. Jessica's intelligent moments were fleeting and unusual, and I could tell that the logic she was having in her mind had ran out. Typical, one-track-minded Jess, she blew me a kiss and ran off to stalk Tyler.

I took a deep sigh of relief as I started the ignition.

Instead of heading straight to Edward's, I decided to stop by home and say goodbye to my mom. I felt bad for lying to her so much lately, and at least this way I felt somewhat better about myself.

When I pulled into the driveway, Laurent was loading some of her bags into the drunk. I parked next to her, not needing to pull into the garage because I was leaving again soon. "Hello, Miss Bella," Laurent smiled warmly to me as I got out of my car. "Did you have a good day at school today?" Laurent's English accent would never fail to amuse me. It never got old.

"Yes, I did, thank you very much," I informed him, grinning. Before I proceeded into the house, I asked him, "Do you know where my mom is at the moment?"

He pursed his lips in thought for a moment. "Up in her room, I believe. She's been having a hard time selecting which carry-ons to bring, and which not to." He sounded like he was trying not to laugh.

"She's been up there all day, hasn't she?"

He nodded, and I rolled my eyes, making my into the house.

I climbed the stairs, walked into her massive room, and sure enough, there she was – silently having a fit about what she was going to pack. "Oh, mother. . ." I sighed, shaking my head theatrically, taking a seat on their large bed.

"Bells," She sighed in frustration, turning to face me. She mashed her face into a menacingly funny scowl. "I hate packing."

I laughed out loud. "I can tell."

"It's so _hard_," She whined loudly. Her complaining made me smile; It was like she was a kid who's parents told her she couldn't get that new Barbie. It was quite comical, actually, so I had to laugh some more.

"It's not that hard, mom," I poked her back teasingly as she frantically raided through her drawers some more.

She turned around, a playful glare on her face as she put both hands on her hips. "You know what, tootsie-cake? I don't see you managing a trip without at least five bags of luggage." I was about to protest when she held up a finger, "_And_, I don't see you being able to pack in less than a day _either_."

"Whatever," I muttered, crossing my arms as well. Two could play that game.

I ended up spending the next hour helping her complete her pack. She was damn lucky she had me, otherwise she would have missed her flight. As soon as the last bag was in, she was already hugging me and saying goodbye.

"Bye, Belly," She told me after letting go. "Stay outta trouble while I'm gone, and look out for your dad for me." She winked.

"I'll try," I rolled my eyes. She got in her Porsche, then rolled down her window before pulling out. "Get me something nice, darling?" I hammered out my best Italian accent. This was routine right before she left on every trip.

"Only for you, darling!" She sang back happily, blowing me one last kiss before pulling out.

Smiling to myself, I walked back inside to grab my keys. Before leaving, I sent Charlie a text message, telling him I'd be at Mike's with some friends for the evening. I didn't feel as bad – Either way, he wouldn't have really cared.

Not long after, I was turning into the alley. It was empty, but that wasn't a surprise. It always was. I wondered if Edward even owned a car. I mean, he had to, didn't he?

I didn't knock this time, because Jasper had made fun of me for being so polite last time. I walked inside, slipping off my flats at the door. When I looked around the room, it was empty. Everything was completely quiet as I made my way through the room.

"Edward?" I called softly. No answer.

"Jazz? Al? Emmett? Rose?" Still nothing.

I had no idea where any of them were – they all had their own completely different schedules, so who knew what any of them were up to. Sighing quietly to myself, I slumped down lazily on his futon. I figured none of them would mind if I just chilled here until someone came. Well, except Rosalie, of course, but that was besides the point.

I reached over to grab the remote from off the coffee table, when my eyes zeroed in on what was lying next to it. Edward's notebook. His infamous, mysterious notebook.

_No, Bella_, I ordered myself silently, _you can't read it; it's wrong_.

I knew it was wrong, and not to mention a complete violation of privacy in every way, but what if something important was inside? What if it held the answers to the many questions I had? Maybe there'd be things written on those pages, giving me insight as to how to help him.

Or maybe there wasn't anything bad at all, and whatever was inside was completely insignificant. I tried to convince myself that, but I had feelings otherwise.

Against my better judgment, I carefully picked it up off the table. _I was going to hell_, my mind continued to scream at me. You know what? It was probably true.

After studying the blank cover for a few moments, I flipped it open to a random page. As soon as I read the first words, I froze. I checked the top of the page for the date, and found that the entry was just under a year old. _Dear Mom, _it read. . .

_Help me – I'm lost. I don't know what to do anymore, Mom. I'm scared that my end is coming soon. What am I suppose to do? I've tried everything I can, and nothing will work. I'm not strong enough; I'm not good enough. Sometimes, I think that it would be better if they just killed me. Then, I wouldn't have to worry about others in my life getting hurt because of me. It's killing me, Mom, that you're not here right now. I need you more than ever, and I feel alone. Completely, utterly alone. I have my friends, but there's only so much they can do. I want to tell them everything, but I can't. I don't want to hurt them by lying, but it's the only way. I can't lose them too. It's already hard enough without you here._

_Love,  
Edward_

I blinked back my eyes, full of tears. I could feel the water about to spill out and stream down my cheeks. The words I had just read had been startling. My last guess on earth would have been that he was writing to his mother. I was stunned into an even thicker silence.

It wasn't just shocking though. It was completely, devastatingly heartbreaking. Literally. My chest ached at the loss he had suffered. I knew that his pain had to be bad, but after reading this, I realized that it was worse. Much worse than I ever would have guessed.

I flipped my fingers gently ahead to another page. I wasn't even sure that I could bring myself to read anymore, after what I had just read. All those times that Edward had been writing in this notebook; All those times I had wondered what he had been writing. . .

_Dear Mom,_

_I've realized that life moves faster than a speeding bullet. I find myself trapped, stuck in a hazy purgatory, not being able to appreciate my surroundings and the blessings that have struck me like lightning, because I am so focused on what's coming next. Even though it feels like I have nothing, and that there's no hope, I know that everything has happened for a reason, and I've learned to accept that. Even though it feels like everything is falling apart, maybe it's just the beginning? Do you think that could be true? I don't have you anymore, but I've learned to manage on the support my friends give me. It still hurts to think about you though. I miss you so much, Mom. I love you._

_Edward_

By now, the hot wet tears were silently streaming down my face as I turned to the most recently written page. The poignancy in his words was almost overwhelming, and it hurt me to even think about all the emotions that must've been swimming through him while writing this.

The last page he had written in had been earlier his morning.

_Mom,  
I wish you could meet Bella. I know you'd like her. She's different – I can't even begin to try and describe her. She's kind of like you, because she always likes to speak her mind. I know she wants to try and fix my broken soul, but I don't know how to tell her that it won't work. Whenever she's around, I feel better. I've figured out that her touch is comforting. It's not just that, though. The things I feel when I'm around her. . . they scare me. Mom, I don't know what to do. I feel like if I try and get my hopes up, everything will fall to pieces in the end. I can't let her get hurt either, Mom. I can't hurt anyone else.  
I wish you were here,  
Edward_

I wiped at my eyes, erasing any signs that I had been crying. Before I could even process another thought, someone cleared their throat. I didn't need to look to see who it was. I had no idea where he had come from, or how long he had been there, but I had a sinking feeling in my chest as I slowly brought my eyes up to meet his.

His expression killed me. He was standing at the opening of the hallway, leaning against the wall with this arms crossed. His green eyes were cold and hostile – more than I had ever seen them before. There was no trace of the carefree Edward I had talked to last night. It was clear in his face that those emotions were long gone.

It wasn't just the fact that he was glaring at me through narrowed eyes that hurt. Through the anger in them, I could see hurt. Betrayal. He looked at me with accusing eyes, and it's like I saw all of the trust he had had in me before crumbled, right then and there.

He stared at me silently for an immeasurable moment. It was not a comfortable silence. It was thick and heavy, the impact tearing me down inside by the power of his bitter stare.

"S'en aller." He finally said in a harsh, curt tone.

Even though I had a pretty good idea of what that could have meant, I stared at him with wide eyes, waiting for an explanation. He sighed, holding my gaze with such intensity, it almost knocked me over. And then, in a low, pained voice, he whispered. "Leave."

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Why - Secondhand Serenade

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION:** _S'en aller _- "leave"

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**_Reviews are better than souvenirs from Renee._**


	7. Je Vous Ai Manqués

**Gah, I feel so bad.  
I haven't been responding to anything lately.  
I'm going to get back on that though.  
Just remember, I read _everything_. Repeatedly most times.  
So yes. I promise I shall do better at replying to reviews and what-not.  
Because I love you. (:**

**Have I told you guys that you're great?  
Because you are.  
Edward loves you too.  
Thanks for being so supportive.**

**--Justine**

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**Edward - Je Vous Ai Manqués**

"Leave." I whispered finally, staring at her through cold eyes.

It felt like I had been kicked in the stomach repeatedly. Everything inside of me felt numb, and I waited for the rage to take over me as she sat there staring, wide-eyed, expecting me to say something else. But it never came. Instead, there was just nothing.

No anger, no pain, no feeling. Nothing.

_Anything_ would have felt better than nothing, because at least then I would be feeling _something_. My mind couldn't process a thought at the moment, and it was like everything that had just happened had been in some sort of surreal dream.

I wish it had been.

Then, there would have been any need for me to make Bella leave. I wanted her out of my goddamn house and away from me at the moment though. I wanted her to get out of my head, and for her fucking brown eyes to leave every fantasy I had. She was tearing me apart – everything she did tormented me in some way or another.

I didn't want to be mad at her, in fact, I wasn't even sure if I was. I was feeling more shocked than anything else. I didn't want to believe that Bella would stoop that low. She wasn't _that_ person. But she did. And I caught her.

_How dare she?_

I didn't want to believe that she did, but I had to. I had seen her reading the damn thing, which I really wished I hadn't. Then, even though it would have been fucked for her to read it, at least I wouldn't have had to know about it.

Then shit could be back to the way it was. Call it crazy, but lately, I had actually been feeling sparks of hope. I didn't hope anymore. I stopped trying long ago.

I raised my limp arm, gesturing towards the door once again. Instead of yelling and screaming at her, I felt more like I wanted to collapse right then and there. A wave of exhaustion swept through me as I stared into her eyes, finding nothing but miles and miles of the same brown that I saw every day.

Finally, she quickly got off my futon and hurried directly past me and out the door, never once looking back.

After what seemed like ages, I slowly made my way over to where she had been sitting. My notebook was open, revealing pages and pages of useless letters that I had written to my mother. She had set it down on the page she had been reading, which to my horror, had been written right after she had left that very morning.

_Shit_.

I wanted to crawl under a large boulder and die there. How fucking embarrassing. It was in that moment that I let my rage finally set in. Clenching my eyes shut and gripping both hands tightly into my hair as the notebook balanced on my lap, I let out a strangled moan.

I looked at the page once again, and noticed black, wet smudges of damp paper scattered over my handwriting. I didn't even have it in me to care at that moment. I couldn't think. I couldn't breathe.

Slamming the bindings shut, I threw the damn thing across the room. It made a muted thud against the wall, before dropping down onto the floor. I glared at it before finally sighing loudly and collapsing back into the soft cushions.

I was beyond frustrated with her – I had trusted her with information that I had told _no one else_. Wasn't that enough for her? Wasn't that enough to make her not look through my personal shit? Anything else I would have been semi-okay with, but not this. This was my absolute most personal thing in the world.

It contained thoughts that I held inside of me, secrets that I didn't bother to pass on. It had my past, my present, and my thoughts on the future. Most importantly, it had my mother.

I wrote to her everyday because when I did – it felt like she was still alive.

And even though dreams were never real, they were better than facing reality. Better than having to face the cruel outside world which showed me no mercy. It's not like I should have been surprised with any of this though. I shouldn't have even been dwelling on it; Shit happened to me everyday, and I had learned a long time ago to just move on.

So why couldn't I now?

I had yelled at her because it had been a first reaction. I didn't bother to listen to her side of the story, because I could only see mine. I didn't want to be mad at her, but I felt like I had to.

While I continued wallowing in my own self pity, I realized that maybe it was better this way. Maybe it was better that I had made her leave. At least it had been for a reason, and I hadn't just been sending her away because I needed to.

Regardless – she was gone now, and probably wouldn't be coming back. Not for a while at least. The fact that I still didn't believe what she had done was one thing. The fact that I _had_ to believe it was another.

The point of the matter was that I was still mad at her, and I didn't want to see her right now.

I wanted to get out of this damn place and do something for once. . .Too bad I had nothing to do. I couldn't go out with Em or Jazz, because it was a Friday night, and my wonderfully persistent mafia would most likely be hunting. Rosalie, better than no one, would be out tonight too, doing her usual street work. Alice would be with Jasper, obviously, and Emmett would be with his mother.

It was one complicatedly obvious puzzle.

Goddamn. Over-dramatics were seriously overrated. Sadly, I was turning into one.

I decided to sleep this shit off; I had too much running through my mind to think straight, much like always. Even though it was only a little after five, calling it a night would most likely be my best option.

I got off my ass and slowly made my way to my room. Everything in my body was exhausted, and sleep would definitely be good for more than one reason.

I threw on some old sweats and discarded my shirt, and as soon as my head was about to crash to my pillows, my phone buzzed. _I could only guess who that could have been_.

I glanced at the caller ID, and got a sinking feeling the moment I read on the screen who was calling me. I answered it without saying anything, as always. I heard a couple of calm, quiet breaths before the bleak voice spoke. "We're hunting." And then the phone went dead.

Sighing and running a hand through my hair, I got up again. I guess sleep was out of the picture now. I walked back out into the main room and over to the door. Locking the three locks I had installed on it, just in case they finally had found me, I snatched the remote from the coffee table and sat back down, on the chair this time.

I began flipping through channels absentmindedly as I took out my phone once again. There was nothing new about tonight than other nights. This was routine. After I got Aro's call, I'd call my family and give them the warning in very little detail.

Though they had no idea of what the story really was, they had a pretty good idea that it involved death. They never pressed for anymore information, and I loved them for it.

Maybe Bella should have taken after them some more.

Before I flipped open my phone, I glanced at my notebook lying sadly on the floor in the corner. Shaking my head and trying to forget, I dialed up Em's number. It was about to be an extremely long night.

**Bella**

I fought back tears the whole drive to Mike's house. There was no use in trying to fight back the remorse that filled me though. I let myself dwell on the pain it had caused me when I had looked into his eyes. In fact, I welcomed the pain. It was what I deserved at the moment.

The way his eyes had looked. I just couldn't get over it.

They had been as cold and as hard as I had ever seen them before. They had been hurt, angry, saddened, and broken. All of the things I had promised myself I wouldn't cause him.

I fucked up big time, and I wasn't sure how to fix what I did.

By going to Mike's damn party, it was my plan on forgetting that anything ever happened to day. I wanted to forget the heartbreaking letters I had read; I wanted to forget the glare he had given me before I had left – the one that cut into me like a knife.

I wanted to forget that I had ever met Edward Cullen.

Then I could stop trying to spend all of my time convincing myself that I wasn't falling for him.

Plus, I couldn't go home anyways. Renee was long gone, I'd be alone, and I already told Charlie that I would probably be out late. Coming home six hours earlier than I had originally planned would most likely arouse his suspicion that something serious was up. I never skipped out on parties.

I finally pulled up on the street, next to Mike's familiar house. I had been here a hundred times; Mike and I usually took turns in throwing the parties. Our houses were the two largest, and everyone seemed to like having them there the best.

I didn't care – I liked hosting things, oddly enough.

Wiping my eyes one last time before I knocked on the door, I took a deep breath. _I could do this_, I told myself over and over. All I wanted was to forget, I reminded myself. I wanted this to be a stress-free night.

Oh who the hell was I kidding myself?

As soon as the door opened, revealing crowds of people, loud music, and Mike's smiley face, I knew I was in for a night of hell. Not in a good way, either.

People greeted me with eager and excited faces as I slowly made my way through the crowd of people. I mustered forced smiles here and there, attempting to appear happy on the outside. The last thing I wanted was for someone to be concerned for me when they were suppose to be having fun.

"Bella!" Mike's loud voice boomed loudly, and before I knew it, I was being crushed tightly to his chest. "Glad you could make it, sweetie!"

It didn't take much for Mike to make me smile. I suddenly realized that he was a lot like Emmett in that way. Shaking my head and grinning, I poked him in the chest. "I just got here and you've _already_ brought out the drinks?"

A lazy grin spread across his face, smiling like a kid who had been got doing something by a person who he knew wouldn't yell at him. Even though my dad was the shit in this state, everyone knew that I wouldn't rag them out for anything.

Unless, of course, they got on my bad side, that is.

Long story short – everyone kissed-ass around me for more reasons than one.

"You wanna do a shot, Hells Bells?" He raised an eyebrow, lightly ruffling my hair. "I got somethin' special for ya, if you'd like?"

I seriously thought about that for a moment. I wasn't the kind of girl who got completely wasted at parties. I rarely drank; only once or twice in my life. But with everything that had happened today, I was wondering if now was the time to get drunk.

He gave me a funny look as I pursed my lips, silently debating with myself.

I suddenly felt horrible for even considering the idea. I wanted to forget everything at the moment, but not like that. I wasn't going to take that route, because who knew how many times I'd want to cry over this green-eyed boy? It wasn't even that though; If I drank every time I did something wrong, I would become an alcoholic. I would become dependent on a poison worse than death itself, and I would hurt others around me.

Of course, I was completely thinking way too much into all of this, but I finally shook my head and politely turned him down.

He shrugged, taking another swig at whatever it was he was drinking at the moment. "You know where to find me if you change your mind, Bee." He winked.

After he left, I looked around at all of the faces of my classmates surrounding me. Striking me with so much force that I was almost knocked down, I realized how little I knew about anyone. I realized that everyone in this room was a stranger to me.

I was suddenly bitter for every girl who had ever looked at me with envy in their eyes. It was always Bella, the perfect girl; Bella, the one who had everything; Bella, the girl who got any guy she wanted.

I narrowed my eyes at no one.

If only they knew.

If I believed what they always said, I would be drowning a pool of lies. They thought I was perfect – I knew better. I was most definitely _not_ a perfect girl. I always put up a damn mask, making people believe the impossible. If only the knew the things I had to go through.

I realized that I wasn't the only one who felt this way. I wasn't the only person who wore a mask to keep people from finding out who was really underneath all of the bullshit.

Edward had been the only person who had understood that about me. Of all people, he would know all about how it felt to feel like you had to prove yourself. He would know what it was like to feel alone. There was no one else like that; only him.

He was the one person I wanted to be with right now.

He was the one person I couldn't be with right now.

This time, I couldn't stop the terrible emotions from knocking me over. In the middle of Mike's crowded living room, I collapsed to the floor and closed my tear-filled eyes. I did not open them back up – I did not resurface.

I heard the humming voices around me, but never acknowledged any of them. I wasn't sure whether anyone noticed me on the floor on not, and I was too depressed to care.

It wasn't long until I felt strong arms lift me off the floor. I didn't bother opening my eyes to see who it was, or where they were taking me. I just let myself be overtaken by the sudden intensity of my remorse.

I heard a door close, and whatever room I was in was quiet and warm. I hadn't realized until now that I had been having a pounding migraine before. Go figure. Was there anything that _wasn't_ wrong with me at the moment.

I was suddenly placed gently on what felt like a soft bed. I still didn't open my eyes. I could feel the hot moisture on my face, and knew that I would probably resemble a raccoon.

I didn't put on water-proof mascara this morning, because I didn't think I would need it.

"Bella?" The same arms were softly shaking me, and the voice was incredibly familiar.

"Jake," My voice cracked from tears, "What are you doing here?"

"I saw you fall," he explained quietly, "You didn't get up, and you were crying."

I let his statement hang in the air without a response.

He sighed, stressed. "Are you drunk?" I shook my head. "That's what I thought – you were never one for alcohol. . ." He trailed off on that thought. "Did someone put something in your drink?" I shook my head again; I hadn't had anything to drink. "Drugs?"

I had to open my eyes, only so that I could roll them at him.

"I'm serious, Bells," He stated in a calm voice as his face also became serious. "Some thing's up with you. What's wrong?" I looked at him for one long second, then burst into tears once again. What was _wrong_ with me?

I sounded equivalent to a hormonal nine-month whole pregnant woman.

I couldn't help myself – I needed some sort of comforting gesture, so I quickly reached for Jacob. My tears wouldn't stop as I clung onto his shirt, and he carefully held on to me, completely bewildered.

After a few moments, I realized that this was wrong. I was probably giving him the wrong idea, and would only end up hurting him more once I told him it still wasn't like that for me.

Momentarily holding the waterworks in for a few seconds, I uncoiled my arms from around his broad chest and muttered an apology. "I'm sorry," I sniffed quietly, scooting away so that there was some more space between us.

It took him a few seconds to give me a response. "It's okay," he finally sighed. We sat in silence in that warm room for a long time; neither saying anything to the other.

My eyes were still moist with the tears I had yet to shed, and I knew that it wouldn't be long before I exploded again. It was probably better if I did it in the confines of my home this time, verses in the middle of a crowded party house.

I sighed, getting off the bed. "I need to go home."

He just looked at me again. He finally sighed too and stood up. "Are you going to tell me what's wrong?" He asked, somewhat frustrated.

"Nope."

"Are you sure you want to go home already? You just got here." He reminded me softly.

"Yep."

That was about all I could handle for the night. I wanted to be at my house. I wanted to curl up in my bed and sleep off all of these frantic waves of sadness I seemed to be having. I wanted to cry myself to sleep so that I would be numb in the morning, and I wouldn't have to deal with the pain from my previous actions.

I knew I needed to be alone. I gently pushed past Jake and walked back down the stairs. He followed closely behind, but never said a word. As I made my way to the door, a couple of people who had witnessed my breakdown stopped and asked me if I was okay.

"Yeah," I would mutter back to each of them in false assurance. "I'm fine."

_Bullshit_.

The fact was, I was most definitely _not_ fine.

I waved goodbye to a drunken Mike and his group of friends as I made my escape. He was too caught up in other things around him to really care about me leaving. Good, I thought to myself, I didn't want to ruin people's nights with my down attitude.

I drove home, told Charlie I wasn't feeling well, and collapsed in the middle of my large bed.

As soon as I was wrapped tightly around in my soft comforter, I let myself release all of the emotions I had been holding in before. And just like I wished, I eventually ended up crying myself to a deep, dreamless sleep.

Saturday was uneventful. I ended up making myself an elaborate meal for lunch, then I cooked Charlie and I another fancy dinner for later that evening. I watched TV, downloaded some songs onto my iPod, and slept a lot.

In other words – I spent a majority of the day moping around hopelessly, feeling sorry for myself. It was fucking pathetic, was what it was. My behavior was downright ridiculous, really.

I also put a lot of my effort into forgetting about the terribly embarrassing breakdown I had had at Mike's party. I shuddered at the mere thought of what had happened.

My mom ended up coming home a day early on Sunday, because Shelly had caught the flu. I had been doing homework all day – mostly extra credit work, only to give me something to do. Never had I thought the day would come when I did homework even though I didn't have to.

I suppose I could have made plans with Jessica, or Kate, or maybe even Angela, but I wasn't in the mood. I wanted to do something with Alice, but I was afraid that Edward would end up getting tied into our plans.

Last I heard, he didn't want me around anymore. I couldn't blame him; I was an awful bitch.

I hadn't seen any of them in two days, which seemed like forever, even though it wasn't. Alice texted me on occasion, asking me where I was and why I wasn't coming over, but I always just gave her an excuse.

It seemed like I was lying to everybody lately.

I felt horrible for it, but I had to do it. I decided that not seeing him at all was better than having to deal with his silent anger directed towards me. I wasn't sure how to earn back his friendship, or even just his trust, because I knew I had fucked things up big time.

I wish I knew what his thoughts were. At least then I would know how to fix things. With sinking intuition, I realized that I wasn't fixing anything, like I had been planning. I was just making everything worse. _Great_.

I wish I had never touched that damn book. Then, Edward's note he had written to his mother about me would still remain true. I knew it sure as hell didn't anymore. For all I knew, he was sitting on his damn futon, writing to her how big of a bitch I was. It wouldn't surprise me.

I suddenly felt ashamed of my thoughts. Of course Edward would never do that. He wasn't that kind of person, despite what his carefully constructed mask always seemed to show. Even though he may have hated me, I knew that it wasn't something in his nature.

I sighed, closing my Science book and falling back into my pillows. I had been locked inside my damn room all morning. I brought both of my hands over my face, then ran them through my hair. With a loud, frustrated sigh, I sat up again.

It was pathetic, really. What was I doing to myself? I officially had _nothing_ to do.

After a few moments of silent thinking, I decided that I would bake cookies. Yeah, baking would be good. It'd take my mind off of things for at least a little while. . .

Before I could finish that thought, there was a knock at my door.

"Honey?" My mom cracked the door open and peeked her head through.

"Yeah?" I slowly dragged myself off of my bed and stood up, making my way over to where she was. I was heading downstairs anyways.

"There's someone at the door for you," she informed me in her usual sing-song voice.

This got my attention. I stopped, raising an eyebrow. "Really?"

She smiled and nodded, "Yes. A young man. A very _handsome_ young man, might I add." She smirked, laughing to herself. "You didn't tell me you knew anyone better looking than Jake, because this guy's _mighty_ good-looking. . ." I wasn't listening to her anymore – I had already pushed passed her and was hurrying down the stairs.

I turned the corner, making my way to our extremely large entry way. Sure enough, standing with his back to me, looking around the house, was the handsome man Renee had been talking about.

With his bronze hair in it's usual disarray, Edward stood his usual head and a half-taller than me as I slowly approached. He hadn't noticed my presence yet, so I quietly cleared my throat, suddenly becoming extremely nervous. Was he here to yell at me?

The moment he heard me, he quickly spun around in my direction. Our eyes immediately locked, and a sense of relief washed over me as soon as I was holding his gaze. I hadn't realized how much I had missed seeing those eyes until I was staring into them again. What was even more of a relief was that his eyes were not angry – not at all. They seemed. . .tired.

Neither of us said anything at first as we both just stared at each other. It wasn't that I didn't know what to say, it was that I had too _many_ things to say, and if I opened my mouth, I wouldn't be able to stop the hundreds of words threatening to escape. I had to say _something_ though.

I took a deep breath, and so did he.

"I'm sorry." I said quietly, breaking his gaze to look down.

"I'm an ass." He stated softly.

The room went silent again, and we went back to staring at each other. Finally, I spoke again. "Come on," I ordered him quietly, "Let's go and sit." I led him into our living room and sat down on the couch. Hesitantly, he sat down next to me, providing us with the necessary distance he thought I wanted.

The truth was though, I didn't _want_ any distance. I just wanted to make-up and hug, and for everything to be better. Well, back to normal, at least. I couldn't ask for too much at one time.

Once we were both seated, I let my eyes fall closed for a moment. I heard his gentle breathing besides me, and counted to ten before I opened my eyes and spoke again.

"I'm so sorry, Edward." My voice came out as a whisper. "I just thought that the more I knew about you, then maybe the easier it'd be to save you. . ." Unexpectedly, he cut me off.

"You can't save the world, Bella." His voice was serious, but almost teasing at the same time.

I pursed my lips, holding in a smile because. I raised an eyebrow. "Maybe I can."

He sighed, shaking his head sadly as his small smile turned back into a frown. "There are just some things that are not savable." He told me quietly in a grim voice.

"And you're _not_ one of them," I quickly responded, as he looked away. His lack of faith in me was almost insulting. No, it wasn't even that, I decided. It was the fact that he had _given_ _up_. That was what was worse.

"Bella," He sighed in a pleading tone. "_Please_," he begged quietly, "Can we just not talk about that right now? Please? It's _always _about that." For some reason, the fact that I wanted to help him hurt him. He was so _odd_.

As much as I didn't want to, I complied to his request. I owed it to him after all, and wanted to earn his trust back. I'd do that however I needed to. In fact, that would be my main focus as of now. I'd get to know him some more. _Then_, I'd figure out some way to help him. . .

I finally nodded, sending him a sad smile.

"Thank you," he sounded genuinely relieved that I wasn't going to press anymore. "Now can it be my turn to apologize?"

Him? Apologize? "For what?" I asked, making myself more comfortable as I adjusted in my seat.

"Don't get me wrong, Bella," He quickly clarified, "What you did totally pissed me off, but don't worry, I'm over it now." He paused, "I just wanted to say sorry for overreacting like that. I guess I just. . .I don't know. . ." His eyes met mine and held them. "It's just that no one's ever seen that before. . ." He whispered. "I guess I panicked."

He looked like he wanted to say more, so I let him. "At first, I wanted to hate you," he admitted quietly, "I mean, it wasn't even that I felt mad, it just felt like I had been completely betrayed." He smiled grimly at me, "Like I said – I overreacted."

If there was one thing I regret more than anything at the moment, it was reading his notebook. I hadn't even thought of the consequences that would follow if he caught me, and I realized that by reading it, I had hurt him more than make him mad. I hung my head.

He continued on. "After you left, I couldn't think straight," he explained, "There were so many emotions running through my head, it was unreal." He paused to look at me, "I wanted to stay mad at you," he said quietly, "I tried." His eyes were remorseful. "But it didn't work so well." He glanced over at me once again, and held my gaze.

"Je vous ai manqués," he told me in a soft voice. I stared at him through questioning eyes. In return, his green eyes were piercing. "I missed you." He whispered finally as a fraction of a smile appeared at his lips.

I couldn't help it – I closed the distance between us by wrapping my arms around him. At first, he didn't return the embrace, and I was afraid that he hadn't forgiven me yet. I slowly started to pull away, "Sorry–" I began to say, before he lightly crushed me back to his chest, hugging me tightly.

I heard him let out a quiet sigh of contentment as we sat there for a moment. His arms were so strong, so _safe_; I don't think I'd ever felt anything quite like them. It was a good feeling. I smiled against his chest, only because I couldn't help it. This had been too easy, it almost didn't seem real.

Proving that this was in fact reality, I heard my mother clear her throat. We both immediately released each other, and I quickly spun myself around to see her standing with her arms crossed against the door frame.

She had the biggest smirk I think I've ever seen in my life. I could feel the blush creep up my face as I took a quick glance at Edward. He was looking down at this feet, running his hand through his hair awkwardly.

Staring at me, she raised an eyebrow, waiting.

"Uh, Mom," I began lamely, "This is Edward." I turned to him, quickly shooting him an apologetic glance before saying, "Edward, this is my mom, Renee."

I rolled my eyes as my mother quickly made our way over to us. We both stood up as she approached, and Edward seemed to be staying as far away from me as possible without making it obvious. She pushed me out of the way as she eagerly shook Edward's hand. "Why hello, Edward," She smiled happily. "I didn't know Bella had a new _boyfriend_."

She turned to me, wagging her eyebrows and winking. "Why didn't you tell me, honey? He's _gorgeous_." She said in a loud stage-whisper. Oh, good lord.

"It's not like that," We both seemed to say at the same time. Edward had the funniest expression. It seemed like he was both amused and scared to death at the same time. She _was_ pretty frightening.

"Edward's a friend," I explained quickly, then paused when I discovered that I didn't have any more of an explanation. I wanted to elbow him for some help, but he already caught on to my thoughts before I had to same them. I was an open book. Horrible at times, but helpful at others.

"Yeah," He told her, his voice completely at ease. "My cousin goes to her school, and we've met a couple of times on group occasions. Parties, football games, dances. . ." He explained, trailing off.

Renee was still wearing that damn smirk. "Well," she smiled at us both, "I'll let you two be now."

"Actually, we were just going to head over to Edward's." I told her. I shot Edward another glance and he didn't seem appalled by the idea, so I went with it.

"Yeah," Edward helped back me up, "Bella's driving me back to my place because I walked here." At first I had wondered how he had found my house, but then I realized that it probably wasn't hard. It's not like our house wasn't one of the biggest in the state.

You know, sometimes I didn't give the guy credit. He was pretty damn smart for someone who stayed locked away in his house all the time. He also caught on to things quite fast. I smiled widely at him because I just couldn't help it.

"Bye, Mom," I rolled my eyes as I pulled Edward along with me towards the garage.

Once we were in my car and pulling out of my driveway, he allowed himself a quiet chuckle. "Your mom. . ." he trailed off in amusement. "She sure is something, Bella." He laughed softly to himself.

I grinned, shaking my head and rolling my eyes once again because I had to agree. She definitely _was_ something.

From the corner of my eye I noticed him put on a pair of aviator sunglasses and slide his hood up. He did that a lot – every time we were anywhere near being out in public. I tilted my head slightly to the side. "Edward, why do you always do that?"

He knew what I was talking about, and took a moment to think silently to himself on what his response would be.

"Just in case." Was all he responded.

His statement appeared to be casual and normal on the outside, but I knew better. I knew that it killed him to say it almost as much as it killed me to hear it. He was hiding. He was _always_ hiding.

_Not for much longer, Edward,_ I promised silently.

_I'll find a way for you to live so you'll never have to hide_.

But as always, things were easier said than done.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Angel - Flight 409

_Quick Explanation: If any of you are confused as to why I chose this song, it's because of how the lyrics fit with Ed's thoughts on Bee. She's constantly urging him to take down all of this walls, and while it's comforting to him, at the same time he's scared at what it's doing to him. He knows he can't become dependent on the comfort Bells gives him, so it's like a love/hate relationship they've got going on._

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION:** _Je Vous Ai Manqués - _"I missed you"

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**Reviews are better than a drunk Mike Newton.**


	8. Famille

**Hello, my lovelies.  
This is a tad bit late, I know.  
I've been pretty sick lately, so that's why.  
It appears to be getting better, but we'll see I guess.**

**So I realize that there are a lot of questions yet to be answered.  
Questions such as - Why did Bella and Jake break-up? Why are the Volturi hunting Edward? Among with others in that area as well.  
My point is, you'll find out in time. I'm not going to never tell you, so don't worry about that.  
You'll find all of it out at one point or another when you're least expecting it. Guarantee that.**

**Well this has been a rather long AN, hasn't it? Sorry 'bout that.  
In case I don't get around to it later, I wish you all extremely HAPPY HOLIDAYS!  
For real? Have a ton of fun and enjoy the break.**

**--Justine(:**

**OH, AND CHECK OUT MY BLOG I FINALLY GOT AROUND TO MAKING.  
LINK'S ON MY PROFILE.**

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**Edward - Famille**

The next week went by faster than I thought possible. We had all once again fallen into a routine, only this time, it included Bella. Even though I didn't want to admit it to myself, things were so much _easier_ with her around.

After I had realized that she hadn't read my notebook to hurt me, and that she didn't actually _want_ to cause me any pain, I got over my incredibly immature fit and finally managed to drag my ass over there. I wouldn't have been able to go another day without making up with her.

Since then, every thing's been just peachy. At least, that's what I liked to think.

It would be the same thing everyday. She'd go to school, do all of her classes and shit, then she'd make her way over here. On her way, she'd stop at one of the many local Starbucks in the area, and order us each a coffee in some delicious form.

She brought me a caramel-vanilla latte everyday, because she had remembered me telling her that it was my favorite. I smiled every time I thought about it.

Bella was also starting to slowly pick up on all of our many habits; the little details which no one really paid attention to. She was catching on to so many things lately, I was amazed at how she took it all in. Not to mention her great memory, which was also pretty significant.

Everything she did with us was just. . .normal. There was no tension, no unwanted awkward conversations. The fact that I was beginning to feel more and more comfortable around her was a good sign. A bad one too though, for obvious reasons. I hated those reasons. I wanted to let myself do whatever the fuck it was I wanted, but I still managed to stay in check with the boundaries of right and wrong.

Just because I had to be shut-off all of the time, didn't mean I couldn't leave myself just the tiniest bit open. I didn't even do it on purpose. It was just that she made things _so_ easy.

There were rarely dull moments around the place lately.

Her and Emmett's childish fighting was downright hilarious, along with the too-intelligent-to-understand conversations she had with Jazz, and the Valley-girl-style conversations she carried with Alice. Hell, even Rose was slowly starting to glare a little less each time she walked through the door.

There would be nights where all of us were there, and Alice and Jazz would be all curled up on the couch cuddling. When Jazz would loose himself and Al was in the room, Bella would quickly usher her into another room and comfort her while we calmed him down. It was a good thing, because every time she had to see Jasper like that, it broke her heart.

The only thing that was making me uneasy about all of this was the lack of involvement on the Volturi's end. It was unusual how rarely they were hunting lately. It gave me this pit-like feeling in my stomach.

Like the calm before the storm or some shit like that.

I didn't let myself dwell on what they might be up to in their absence though. It took too much energy to be constantly afraid than to be actually prepared and ready for what happens to come.

I hadn't told Bella anything else yet. I knew I could at any point, and she'd still be just as understanding as she had been at the park. For some reason, I couldn't though. I wanted her to know everything about me, but at the same time I didn't. I guess I was just waiting for something.

I no longer wrote to my mother while Bella was around. Again, I wasn't sure _why_, that's just how it was. For some reason it just felt weird. Now that she knew what I was writing, I mean. It just didn't feel the same. It felt crowded and uncomfortable to take it out while she was in the room.

I really didn't understand myself sometimes.

It was Monday afternoon. I had spent a majority of my day working out, because I never got out, and there was really not much else to do. Al and Jazz had already gotten home from school and were stationed at their usual spot on the couch, working on homework together.

I wished I still got homework. Then I'd at least have _something_ to do every once and a while. I'd normally help Bella with hers, but there was only so much she'd let me do before swatting my hand away. Apparently we were _cheating_ if I helped her too much. I couldn't help but to laugh at that one.

The door swung open and in walked my coffee girl. She had the hood to her light pink hoodie up with her long brown curls spilling out and around her face. Since it was early March, she had on mittens and a matching scarf. She was wearing dark blue, tight-fitting jeans and a pair of matching pink high-tops. And as always, wearing the cutest damn smile I had ever seen.

Why did I always have to _notice_ all of this shit? It was beyond obsessive. It was scaring me how much I paid attention to her appearance.

I had a feeling that it was like this for Bella all the time though. I knew that wherever she went, the eyes of a majority of the male population would follow. Even though I didn't want to think about a ton of guys eye-fucking her all of the time, I knew it was a true fact.

Truth was, she was just too sexy for her own good.

It was also probably a good thing I didn't go to her school – God knows how I would react to seeing all of those guys ogle her shamelessly. She wasn't even _mine_ though, so she could do whatever the hell she wanted.

And if walking around in sexy but appropriate, tight-fitting clothes everyday was what she wanted, then so be it. My say in this was no where.

"Hey, Bee," Alice grinned from her seat, holding out her small hands.

"Good work, Swan," Jazz praised her as she handed him his steaming cup. "You've got my usual down, _finally_, and it only took you five tries." Bella smirked at him while rolling her eyes.

Then, she made her way over to me. She held the tray in both of her hands, containing both hers and my cups. She carefully handed me the tray, sliding her backpack off of her shoulders and plopping down next to me.

"How was school?" I asked as I handed her her cappuccino.

She responded by moving her eyes to her backpack on the ground, glaring daggers at it for a good long moment, and then proceeding to mutter something under her breath about the indignity of school work.

I chuckled at her pissed expression. "Well let's get to work then, Sunshine."

She had not been exaggerating at all. Two hours later, we were still positioned in the exact same spot with about four different texts books spread out, along with lots of pencil shavings, a couple of notebooks, and not mention the fact that our coffee had been long gone hours ago.

I was in desperate need of some more caffeine.

Bella let out a frustrated sigh, throwing her fourth pencil to the floor and slamming her small fist down on the cover of her ridiculously large math book. "I've been working on the same damn problem for fifteen fucking minutes!" She complained in a loud, whiny tone. "At what point am I going to need to know how many times the square root of pie can go into the the number seventh-thousand-four hundred-and-fifty two, _then_ multiply that number by the square root of a twenty-thousand-six hundred-and-ninety one, _then_ divide that number by the lowest prime number times _x_?"

We all stopped what we were doing to stare at her. There was a moment of complete silence, before the three of us began laughing our asses off.

When Bella swore, it was the funniest thing. Her rants about meaningless things in life were definitely the highlights of my day. I patted her on the back, still snickering between chuckles. "I'm sure it'll come in handy one day, Bells."

She narrowed her eyes at me, then moved the book off of her lap, shoving it into mine. She was also in desperate need of a large dose of caffeine. Maybe eve more than me.

At least her biology I had been working on had been fairly simple. Defining the different types of onion cells was definitely not one of the hardest things to do in the world.

Before I could protest, she snatched the biology book from me, and started working on finishing what I had done so far. I stared down at the shit-load of fractions and numbers scribbled on to her paper and a migraine immediately formed.

Needless to say, a half an hour later, I threw that motherfucking book onto the floor and walked out of the room. Guess who's turn it was to laugh _then_?

Bella left around nine that night. Alice and Jazz left shortly after her. Em called to tell me that he'd be staying put at his place tonight, and Rose hobbled in at around midnight. I never bothered asking how her day was, because I always got the same, sad look.

I couldn't fall asleep that night, because my inner right and wrong continued to keep up a constant battle.

Was what I was doing right? I knew I was becoming close to Bella, which was something I had forbidden a long time ago. The wrong here was that her life could still be in danger if I made even the tiniest slip. I couldn't keep her away though, and for some reason, I _wanted_ to become close to her. I needed it.

That was where the right came into play. Each day, I would be craving her comfort more and more. Even the slightest of touches made me feel better, and relaxed. Her words were what held me together, and kept me from going insane. She saw through me, and whenever I needed it, her reassurance would always be there waiting for me.

There was literally no win-win situation here for me.

The truth of the matter was that you always know the right thing to do. The hard part was _doing_ it. . .

"Alright," Jazz stated loudly with all six of us in the room. "You guys better get your asses to my place by six. Mom wants you all over for dinner."

Emmett, lacking any interest of previous conversation, quickly perked up in his seat. "Damn, dude," He sighed dreamingly, "You _know_ I can't pass up your mother's cooking. It's a step away from fucking _heaven_."

As Jasper proceeded to rolling his eyes, Alice, Rose, and I all muttered our approval. Bella, on the other hand, did not look too thrilled about it. She seemed almost hesitant actually.

Her nose was buried in some book of hers as she tried to hide her supposed nerves. I nudged her gently in the shoulder, and she quickly looked up to meet my eyes. I was right – there was definitely hesitance there.

"What's wrong?" I asked, genuinely confused.

She shook her head, looking away again. "Nothing. It's stupid," I heard her mutter quietly as she went back to reading.

I wasn't letting her off the hook that easy. A while ago, I had learned that when something bugged Bella, it _really_ bugged her. "Well I wanna know." I responded in a casual tone. If I didn't make this a big deal, then neither would she.

She sighed, shutting her book and meeting my curious gaze once again. "Like I said, it's stupid," she began. "I just. . .I don't think I should go. I don't want to intrude or anything, and it's not like I–"

I held up a finger, cutting her off. "_Stop_." I almost complained.

If she was about to take the whole 'I don't fit in' route, then I would probably get really pissed. Though I couldn't disagree that she really _didn't _fit in–being so much higher in the standard of living than the rest of us–we had been through this before; we all _wanted_ her here, and that was what really mattered.

A lazy smile spread across my face. "Your part of the family now, Bee." I told her, smirking at her expression. "And just because _you _haven't grasped that yet, doesn't mean you get to start skipping out on _family _events."

She didn't respond right away as she thought about my words. "Okay," she finally sighed with a defeated smile. "I'll go."

I didn't understand why she was so damn nervous. Being the open book she was, the emotion was written all over her face as we all walked up the stairs to Jazz's front door.

I may not have understood that, but I _did_ understand that she needed some sort of comforting gesture to ease her tension. I realized that it worked both ways between the two of us. The comforting thing, I mean. She could tell when I needed, and I could tell when she needed it.

Without thinking, I reached out and grabbed her small warm hand – grasping it tightly in mine.

"Thanks." She whispered into the cold, still air. I was barely even sure I heard it. I gently gave it a quick squeeze before we walked through the door behind Em and Rose, and warm air quickly engulfed our cold skin.

As always, Jazz's house smelled like cookies and candles. His mom was crazy about that sort of shit. It was never something _I _complained about. Personally, I loved the smell. It was so much more refreshing than the dull air I had to smell everyday.

Bella let go of my hand long enough so that we could each slip off our jackets. Once the coats were hung up, our fingers intertwined once again, finding the other like a magnet.

Alice was close behind us, and I caught her smirking at our joined hands. I ignored her; letting her silently make whatever the hell assumptions she wanted to. There wasn't much of an explanation to why we did what we did anyways.

Jazz's mom smiled at us as we all made our way into the tiny dining room. It was a miracle that all of us fit in that small room. She greeted and hugged us each as we walked by, stopping when she got to Bella in front of me.

"And who might you be, dear?" She smiled warmly at Bella.

"I'm Bella Swan," I heard her respond in calm, friendly voice. I was glad her nerves had seemingly disappeared. "You have a lovely home, and son." She added with a slight smirk.

"Well then," she pulled Bella into a embrace, just like the rest of us, "It's very nice to meet you, Bella." I let go of her hand so that she could go and find a seat. His mom noticed, and once Bella was gone, raised an eyebrow. "Are you two. . .?"

"No," I quickly clarified, though the urge to say yes was much stronger than I would have expected.

She pulled me into a hug, "Maybe you should be." She whispered into my ear before releasing me. I wanted to roll my eyes, and she could tell. "I'm serious, Edward." she told me.

As I walked over to take my place at the table, I realized that I wanted to agree with her, but couldn't. If only she knew, I thought. If only she knew what danger Bella would be in being my girlfriend. Hell, her _son_ was already in danger because of me.

Bella smiled as I sat in between her and Rose.

It wasn't a surprise that Em had already began piling food onto his plate. Jazz's mom had cooked us up a fucking feast. It was like Thanksgiving whenever we came here. There was a deliciously seasoned turkey, potatoes to die for, and so much more.

"Emmett, slow down," Bella joked as he continued shoving spoonful after spoonful into his mouth.

He chuckled, quickly wiping his face with a napkin. "That's what she said, Bella." He informed, "That's what she said." Bella narrowed her eyes, letting out a quiet huff.

Minutes went by where no one said anything; everyone too busy shoving food into their mouths. Alice was the one who finally started up a conversation.

"So, Miss Whitlock, how's work been lately?" She beamed her politest smile. His mom loved the _shit_ out of Alice. Favoritism was clearly not something she was opposed to. Then again, she was Jazz's girlfriend.

"Busy," she sighed, "As always."

We all gave her sympathetic smiles. Working three different jobs a day had to have been a bitch. In fact, we rarely were able to have dinners like this very often because she was always out working.

"Hey, Rosalie," his mom asked in a gentle tone, "How's your dad been lately?"

Rose's usual _fuck you_ expression quickly changed into a mask of sadness. She always used to try hiding her pain from the rest of us, but after a while figured out that it was too much effort. I would know – putting up walls to block people out was incredibly difficult.

Emmett's face grew remorseful as he watched Rose hang her head. He placed a hand on her bag, lightly rubbing it up and down. "He's getting worse," she said quietly, "The chemo hasn't been working lately, and they don't think he'll be around that much longer. . ."

"Rose," Emmett assured in a hopeful tone. "He'll be alright."

She bit her lip, holding back tears as she nodded and looked down at her plate. Her father was an extremely sensitive subject to bring up, and no one rarely did. Maria cared for all of us like we were her own, so the only reason she brought it up was so that she could help.

"Emmett's right, dear," she responded softly, "Your daddy will make it through all of this, I promise." Rose didn't say anything, eating in silence for the rest of the meal.

Bella ate without a word, and I could tell something was eating at her again. The room was unusually tense, which was the last thing anyone wanted; especially me. I lived my life with a pole always up my fucking as, having to watch my back every damn second. This was the _one_ place I didn't have to do that.

I sighed loudly, pushing my clean plate aside. I shot Alice a pointed glance, pleading her with my eyes for her to say _something_. Why was everyone so quiet tonight?

"What about that economy," Alice laughed nervously, waving her hand dissmisively.

"Why the hell do we care about the economy, Al?" Em responded automatically.

Alice narrowed her eyes and glared at him. "Well _excuse_ me for trying to start a civil conversation, _Emmett_." She gritted through her teeth, irritated.

"Think of a better topic starter next time, toots," he told her wrinkling his nose. "I hardly call sitting around a dining room table and talking about old guys with gray hair driving our country into the black hole of death is a good way to start friendly banter." He crossed his arms, pleased with his conclusion.

"Emmett," Jazz hissed as Alice continued to glare, "Knock it off, prick."

"Boys." His mom shut her eyes, shaking her head. "Must you _always_ argue."

Emmett smirked, proudly pointing a finger in Jazz's direction. "He started it," then, he actually had the nerve to stick out his tongue. I rolled my eyes, letting out a frustrated sigh while running my hand through my hair. No conversation was definitely better than listening to those two banter like five year olds.

None of us ever dared to swear in front of his mom, and by the look of both Jazz and Al's faces, they were both holding in a _lot_ of profanities.

"Em," Bella said in an irritatedly playful tone, "I'm gonna tell you a little more about me, alright? I'll let you in on a little secret." He nodded, eagerly urging her to go on. "I like long walks," she said in a sugar-sweet voice. Her face then became menacing. "Especially when they are taken by those who _annoy_ me."

Jasper, in the middle of drinking his milk, started choking on it from laughter. Alice started giggling uncontrollably as her and Bella exchanged dainty high-fives across the table. Rose even cracked a smile. I smirked at Em's expression. Priceless, really. He had no comeback, for once.

Emmett who had been narrowing his eyes for a good long minute finally slipped and a smile broke out across his face. "I've taught you well, Bells. I gotta give you that – I'm proud of you."

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever you say, Em."

Everyone gradually began finishing off their plates with small talk here and there. My phone suddenly buzzed in my pocket, and I slipped it out to see that I had a new text message. I rose an eyebrow, flipping it open to read it.

_You better be hiding tonight_.

I gritted my teeth tightly together as my whole body became tense. Fuck, I didn't want to do this tonight. Bella looked me with a curious sideways glance. I shook my head, my eyes bleak. Her smile dropped and immediately she knew what was up.

I had to leave; I couldn't risk being seen with all of them. Even if it was unlikely, I was not about to take chances. If they saw anyone with me, that person would be doomed. I looked around at the caring faces of my family – my _famille_. Nothing in the world could have made me force that upon them. Their fates would not get tangled with mine.

"I have to leave," I announced to the table in a flat voice.

Em gave me a weary look, knowing what was up and silently promising to let them all know that they couldn't stay with me tonight. "The meal was wonderful as always, Miss Whitlock," I thanked her genuinely, standing up and pushing in my chair. "Thanks for having me."

She looked a bit confused by my sudden departure. "Anytime, dear. Anytime." She smiled.

I walked to the door, slipping on my shoes and coat. It wasn't that far of a walk, and it was too dark to be able to notice details. If I put my hood up, I knew that it would work in the short amount of time it would take to get back to the house.

I was about to open the door when Bella quickly joined me in the entry way. "Are they hunting?" She asked, though she already knew the answer. I gave her one hard nod. Her eyes saddened.

"I'll come with you," she suggested in a hopeful tone. I was shaking my head before she could even finish the sentence. She looked determined though. "Let me come," she urged, "You shouldn't be alone."

"Bella," I sighed, hating denying her. "You can't come. It's too dangerous and risky."

"I'm a big girl, I can handle myse–" I cut her off.

"I am not negotiating this, Bella." I told her in a harsh tone. "You're not coming."

I felt horrible as I watched her face fall. She dropped her eyes to the floor, hanging her head. I hated myself for being so cruel, but if I cherry-coated everything for her, she would never grasp how serious I was about all of this shit being dangerous.

"I'm sorry," I softly after a few moments. "I don't want you getting hurt."

She looked up at me through her long lashes with sad eyes and nodded.

With one last apologetic glance, I opened the door and stepped out into the cold, dark night.

**Bella**

Rejection was harsh.

Even if necessary, it still hurt.

Edward's words were true, and I knew that he was only trying to protect me, but dammit. I wanted to _help_ him. Not watch him slowly die day by day. This insane vendetta was eating him apart, forcing him away from everything good in life.

I was close to home, hitting every green light as I drove. Dinner had been interesting. Jasper's mom was really nice, and a really good cook. It was weird being there, because it felt like I had been intruding. No matter how many times Edward tried to assure me that wasn't the case, I still couldn't believe him.

I had silently taken notes, planning on things I would do in the near future. For starters, I'd visit Rose's dad in the hospital. It was tonight that made me realize how much suffering in silence she did daily. The fact that she had to go through hell to get money for his operations was seriously disturbing.

If money was the issue, I'd take care of it. I wanted her to be happy. Maybe if she would be happy, she'd like me more. It was only a theory though.

I also wanted to find out more about Em's mom. He was always with her, and always talked about her; it had me curious. Maybe I could find a solution to that problem too.

Edward had said that I couldn't save the world. Maybe he was right to a point – I couldn't save the world, but I could save them from the world. They deserved happiness. They all did. Especially Edward.

Him being the most selfless person I had ever met did not help matters when it came to me wanting to involve myself in his life. Everyday he'd look at me with the same eyes; sad and defeated, telling me over and over that it wasn't safe for me to be near him. Of course, I never listened. If it was the last thing I did, I would do it. I would fucking save him.

Starting tonight.

I'd be a good girl and do what he told me – I would stay away from him tonight, even though I was completely opposed to the idea. None the less, that didn't stop me from attempting to do my research.

I pulled into the driveway next to my mother's car.

Charlie had taught me many things on the computer. I had learned how to do background checks, criminal records, phone numbers, addresses, and all that other stuff. Being daughter of one of the most powerful men in the state was quite rewarding at times.

"How was dinner with your friends?" Renee asked as I walked through the kitchen. In very little detail, I had mentioned to her earlier about the five of them. Luckily, I had left before she could press for more information.

"Fine," I half-smiled.

"Fine?" She raised an eybrow.

"Fine." I clarified, my tone final. "I have a headache," I lied easily, "I'm going up to sleep." She pouted a little, nodding her head and kissing me on the cheek. "Love you, sweetie."

"Love you, too."

Making an effort to go up the stairs in a slow, believable manner, I dragged my feet loudly until I got to the top. I shut my door behind me once I was in my room, grabbing my laptop and walking over to sit on my bed.

I turned it on, pulling up Google. I wondered how many results I would get. All I really needed was a phone number or an address. . .

I kept it simple, typing in _Volturi_. I groaned when I saw that the word had over a thousand results. Sighing loudly, I began quickly scanning through the general definition of each and every entry. After an hour, I decided that nothing seemed to fit.

I pursed my lips, trying to remember anything important Edward had told me. It took me a few minutes, but suddenly a name popped into my head. Aro. He had mentioned something about Aro as being sort of the leader. This time, I typed in _Aro Volturi_.

I allowed myself to smile when only three hundred results. After fifteen minutes of some more sifting, I finally found something remotely close to the small details Edward had told me. I opened up the link. The bold heading read:

_After Jane's sudden death and Alec's sentence into prison, sons Aro, Marcus and Caius disappear._

I figured out that this had been some sort of an article, dating back and going on around almost three years ago. This had to be them. I also remembered Edward telling me about there being three of them. I clicked on another link, leading to a series of pictures.

There were photos of the each of them, all teenagers, all supposedly missing. There was also a prison shot of their apparent father, Alec. Even in an old black and white copy, something about the picture seemed familiar.

I went to the next page.

The articles were now talking about suspicion of their appearance in society. It mentioned a few things about possible fingerprints behind murder, the records of purchasing illegal weapons, and a few other claims. _Bingo_, I thought. I had found them.

I stopped at an article that caught my eye. A picture, actually, with a long caption under it. The caption read – _Finger prints of Marcus Robert Volturi found on empty spray paint can bottle. Grafiti found, but not interpretable._

The photo was of an old, brick wall with a spray-painted sign on it. I was immediately able to pick out the image; It was a skull, symboling was more though – A large "C" and "M" had been painted next to each other in the skull's opened mouth.

C and M. . .Why did that sound so familiar?

And then it just clicked.

_Chasse Mortelle_.

My face probably went about ten shades whiter than it already was. I gulped. Well, at least I knew I was at the right place. This was most definitely them.

I tried to remember everything Edward had told me about them, which was practically nothing. I remembered him telling me that his uncle murdered his mother. I also remembered him telling me that the reasons behind the Volturi's killing spree also had to do with his mother. I was getting the feeling lately that Edward wasn't a hundred percent on why the reasons were in the first place.

I read through a few more articles, finding none of them too surprising or too coincidental. It was all basically the same stuff over and over. They had been reported to still be hiding, and also reported to have left the state. This article was written two years ago and of course, I knew better.

I wondered if Charlie had ever heard about them. Before closing out of the page, I bookmarked it for later use. I wrote down the three names on a piece of paper, making sure I had the spelling right. Then, I opened up a program my dad had downloaded onto my laptop in case I needed it.

Pretty sure I loved my dad. He allowed me to use restricted government programs so that I wouldn't have to deal with loser boyfriends, and perverted stalkers. Thanks dad.

Once the program was up and ready, I did an extensive search on the three of them. I typed in Aro's name, and as suspected, only one result appeared. Having both an unusual first and last time tended to do that.

I clicked on his name, and up popped a list of pages and pages of records. I scrolled down to more recent dates, and under location, he was still listed as unknown/missing. Either way, that information wasn't crucial to me. It's not like they would have any records of places he was hiding. Edward had told me they were smart, and I was really starting to believe him.

I checked under listed phone numbers. That's what I really needed, though I wasn't really sure what my plan was yet.

As expected, there weren't any recently listed. I began slowly scrolling back up the list of records, stopping once I got to the period right before their 'disappearance.' There wasn't anything listed under home phones, but I finally managed to find a cell number.

It was listed as _disconnected_, but something told me that wasn't true. It was the only number in all of his damn records, so it couldn't possibly be disconnected. Maybe I was completely wrong, but I decided I'd give it a try.

I pulled out my iPhone and dial *67 before the actual number. I was smart enough not to give him access to my number.

I took a deep breath and pressed the send button.

On the fourth ring, I got an answer.

"Hello?" A bleak voice responded.

I gulped. "I-is this A-Aro?" I asked in a quiet, shaky voice.

There was a long pause on the other end before he finally responded. "Yes, my dear. Yes it is."

* * *

**CHAPTER SONG: **Pieces - Red

_WHY? 'Cause it fits Edward like a glove. Go listen to it now, kay? You'll see why I mean._

* * *

**FRENCH TRANSLATION:** _famille _- "family"

* * *

**_This chapter is my Christmas present to you.  
Reviews are my Christmas presents from you._**


	9. Soyez Prudents 

****

Hope everyone had a good Christmas!  
Sorry if I didn't get to everyone's reply - holidays had me busy the last week!  
But I read 'em all. Twice. And loved them. As always. (:

This chapter will be lighter than your expecting, due to my unsually high spirits while writing it.  
WARNING: Major Bitchella this chapter. But hey, you all knew she'd come out eventually. ;D

Check out my blog [link in profile] and follow me!  
ALSO. Check out the Twilighted thread for The Runaways that my wonderful friend Emma has made me. [link also in profile]

JUSTINE: Your pretty tense, huh?  
EDWARD: -huffs- I read the last chapter, didn't I? -crosses arms and glares-  
JUSTINE: -giggles-  
EDWARD: Not amused. At all. Just because you thought it'd be funny to have my girl lack any common sense what-so-ever in the last chapter, doesn't mean you get to laugh.  
JUSTINE: -giggles again-  
EDWARD: Gah, shut it! She WILL figure this shit out, okay? She knows what she's doing!  
JUSTINE: -giggles some more- Whatever you say, bud.  
EDWARD: -exasperated sigh- And this is why I hide away all day.  
JUSTINE: -breaks into a fit of laughter-  
EDWARD: -narrows eyes- Ugh. Just shut up so I can go and read how much damage you've inflicted on my life this chapter.  
JUSTINE: That's the winning attitude!  
EDWARD: -shakes head- No.

* * *

**Edward - ****Soyez Prudents**

I was spread out lazily on the futon, staring absentmindedly at the TV, half-awake and half-asleep when Bella walked in. Everyone was somewhere else, so I had been bored as hell the whole damn day.

A smile spread out on my face at her entrance. "You didn't die," she confirmed to herself happily as she walked into the room. She was unusually chipper for it only being a Tuesday. Something was up.

I let out a hallow laugh. "No, not yet."

She narrowed her eyes as she sat down comfortably in the chair next to me. She never appreciated my casual joking of the matter. It wasn't even joking though, it was the truth. And as much as she didn't want to hear it, it was reality.

After she was seated, her smile refused to go away.

I rose an eyebrow. "What are _you_ so happy about?" I accused in a light tone.

She pursed her lips for a moment, silently debating in her head on what she was going to tell me. "Well," she finally began, still grinning. "I took care of your problem."

This caught my attention. I sat up in my seat, staring at her. What did she mean by _took care of my problem_? Because God knows I had a lot of them. I furrowed my brow in question. "What do you mean?" I asked.

"The Volturi," she stated proudly, "They won't hunt you anymore."

I suddenly got this sinking feeling in my stomach, and was very nervous. Nothing could stop the Volturi from hunting. _Nothing_. If she thought she had fixed my _problem_, she was gravely mistaken. My expression became completely serious, and my voice was strained. "What do you _mean_ by that?" I repeated anxiously.

I was fairly positive I didn't want to hear her answer. "I made a deal with them," she explained. Fuck, this was most definitely not going anywhere good. I waited for her to continue. "Aro said if I paid him twenty-grand, him and his brothers would stay away."

I felt like I was about to throw up.

I leaped out of my seat, standing up in a hurried frenzy. No, no, no, this could _not_ be happening. "Bella," I gritted through my teeth, clenching my eyes shut as I spoke in a quietly painful voice. "Give. Me. _Details_."

She looked generally confused by my reaction. Like she had been expecting me to dance around the room at her supposed good news. Quite the opposite, actually.

Bewildered, she began her explanation. "Well, we talked for a little bit. He asked me how I knew you, and I said I was a friend. Long story short, I asked him what it would take to keep them from hurting you. We eventually agreed to a compromise, that if I paid him twenty-thousand dollars, he'd stay away from you."

I let out a painful moan. It was worse than I expected. Much worse. I pulled at my hair, fisted the air, kicked the wall. Everything had been going so _well_ lately.

"Bella," my voice came out in a shaky breath. "Please tell me your kidding." I begged, even though I knew it was no use.

She was looking at me confused still. "Edward, I don't underst–"

"Bella, don't you see?" I growled, pacing around the room like an angry tornado. There was no way I could have held still in that moment. I needed something to punch, and I didn't want my fists anywhere near her pretty face. "The Volturi _do not_ keep to their agreements! If that was the case, they would have left me alone a long time ago. They are now twenty-fucking-grand richer, and _still_ after me."

A thought quickly came to me. "How did you get the money to them?" I quickly asked. "_Please _tell me you didn't hand-deliver it."

She still looked completely surprised. "Of course I didn't," she quickly came to her own defense. "I'm not _that_ dumb." As of right now, that was debatable. "He agreed to have me put it somewhere he would find it, so I had my waiter, Laurent, put it in between the cracks of this one building we agreed to a couple of miles away. . ." She trailed off, seeing my expression.

Her logic was making absolutely no sense. What the hell had she been thinking? She was the baby seal, up against the killer whale. It was a fact, and no matter how much she didn't want to agree with it, it would always be true. We would never win. She would never be able to help me. But still. She should have known better than to having fucking _called_ them!

"Cash or check?" I asked finally, locking my eyes with hers.

She stared at me a long moment before finally responding in a whisper, "Check."

"_Fuck_," I mouthed, sinking miserably back into the futon. I closed my eyes, leaning my head back, taking deep, unstable breaths. I didn't even have to ask if her name was on that check, because I already knew the answer I would get.

And now they knew about her.

With sinking realization, I knew that twenty-grand was a big deal. If she was willing to just throw that away on an attempt to save me, the Volturi would take that to every advantage they could, and they would throw Bella into their sick games.

Pain coursed through my body and it was unbearable. How had I let this happen? Not to Bella. Anyone _but_ Bella. She didn't deserve this. I had never hated myself more than in that moment.

I looked over at Bella and when our eyes met, understanding finally came to her. Her eyes became wide and her jaw dropped. She began slowly shaking her head, "Oh shit." She whispered. "Shit, shit, shit, _shit_!"

I felt like screaming. "Bella," I moaned, "Why would you _do_ that?"

"I didn't. . .I didn't know this would–" she started to studder, "I didn't know this would happen! I'm sorry. . .I didn't. . ." I watched as the tears began to build up. We stared at each other for a long moment. I looked into her innocent, glassy eyes, wishing nothing more than never having her cross paths with me at all.

Then she would be _safe_.

I suddenly stood up and began desperately pacing again. I tried to think of something positive about all of this, but there was nothing. Absolutely fucking nothing. This wasn't happening. It couldn't have been.

"Edward," I heard Bella barely whisper. "I'm sorry." Her voice cracked, and I looked over to see the teardrops spilling from her brown eyes.

"Jesus, Bella," I quickly rushed over to her, kneeling at her side. I used my thumbs to wipe away her silent tears that kept coming. "I'm a fucking dumbass," I muttered angrily to myself. I hadn't once took the time to even acknowledge what Bella had done for me. "Bella," I pleaded softly, "Don't apologize! You didn't know any better, and this is all my fault."

She blinked a few times, her face becoming impossibly sadder. "It's my fault though. I didn't think! I should have known. . ." she began crying. "I should have known better." She sniffed.

Instead of crying because she was now a target on their death list, she was crying because she thought I was _mad_ at her. Her logic was so flawed, I don't even think she realized it. It was also hard to understand.

She was beating herself up over all of this and it absolutely killed me to see. "Scoot over," I instructed, judging the amount of space left on the small recliner. I ended up scooping her up in my lap once I was seated, and she rested her head on my chest.

I rubbed a hand gently up and down her back, waiting for her to calm down. I had so many things I wanted to say at that moment, but none of them seemed to be appropriate. Instead of having to break the silence, I waited for her to speak.

She sniffed one last time, dabbing at her face and proceeding to sit up on my lap. She stared blankly ahead at the TV, and I wondered where her mind could have possibly been at.

"It all seemed like such a good idea," she explained quietly. "I mean, I guess I just thought it would work for some reason. . ." She paused for a few moments before closing her eyes and letting out a devastating groan. "_Shit_, I don't know what I was thinking!"

She was right, of course, but I wasn't about to be a dickhead and agree with her. I had already gotten all of that out of my system.

Unfortunately, the anger was only replaced by sheer fear and panic. "God, stop apologizing," I told her again, softly but strictly. "We've got bigger fucking things to worry about." She had no idea what she had just gotten herself into.

She grimaced at my harsh tone, looking a little taken back by the hostility which was not directed towards her. "I don't think it's _that_ big of a deal."

Alright, scratch the whole _'I got it out of my system earlier' _shit. Her comment caused me to explode once again, slamming my head against the back of the chair. Goddamn, what was _with_ her today? Was she on fucking drugs? Why was she so incapable of forming _sense_?

"Bella," I growled through my clenched teeth, "They are going to fucking come after you now. If they think I cared about you enough, they would use that against me and we would _both_ die." I took a deep, hard breath. "What's _not_ to get?"

"You care about me?" She asked in a tiny, surprised voice, sounding like such a teenage girl.

I narrowed my eyes, not amused. Now was certainly not the time for any sort of fluffy confessions. "Bella," I stated in an even sharper tone. "_Listen to me_." Her eyes became on the verge of frightened for once. "Your name was on that fucking check. They now have access to _everything about you_. They could kill you."

The power the truth held behind those words caught me off guard. This was not some false alarm scenario. This was happening; this was real. Bella could die.

Bella could die because of _me_.

She was now a vulnerability, and her life was at stake. All because of fucking_ me_. Instead of apologizing to her about dragging her into this shit, I was sitting there yelling at her after she had basically just given her life away for me.

I was a fucking dick.

I let out the breath I hadn't realized I had been holding. "Bella," I spoke in a relatively calm voice. "I'm not letting you out of my sight until we figure out a temporary plan to keep you safe." She nodded somberly, and we both began to think out loud.

"Okay, so I'm safe here, right?" She asked, a lot calmer than I expected her to be after what she had just heard.

"Yeah, you should be. . ." I trailed off, pausing. "Unless you have your Ferrari." Shit, if that car was parked anywhere near this place right now we'd be dead in a matter of hours. My eyes widened with panic, but before I could get too worked up, Bella was already shaking her head.

"I don't drive that car around anymore, now that it's so cold. Or at least not today." She explained, "My dad's always had a second car for me that I never really use. Only when there's a lot of snow and the weather's bad, I guess."

I rolled my eyes. Of course she had a car for every season. I wasn't even close to surprised. I let out a relieved sigh. "What kind of car is it?" I rose an eyebrow.

"A Volvo." She responded with almost a grimace. "It's not my favorite car, but I guess it's fine."

A Volvo was much more conspicuous than a Ferrari, which was good. "How often do you drive it?" I questioned, taking mental notes of all she was telling me for later use.

"Only a couple of times a year," she shrugged. "I just like my Ferrari so much better."

Again, I had to roll my eyes. The cost of her two fancy little sports cars was more than my fucking ass. That was besides the point though. Point was, we just solved our little transportation issue.

"Okay, then drive that around from now on." I instructed her, "I'm serious. No Ferrari." She nodded solemnly. "Oh, and from now on, don't park in the alley, alright? Park by a store somewhere nearby, _always_ wear your glasses, and _always_ make sure you don't have any followers." She nodded again.

There was a few seconds of silence. "I'll be fine at my home," she told me matter-of-factly.

I furrowed my eyebrows together, giving her a doubtful look. "Bella, you may not be the best person to judge what's safe and not sa–"

"Edward," she cut me off, rolling her eyes dismissively. "Charlie's the most powerful security authority in the state, and top ten in the country. Do you honestly see them as being stupid enough to try and get through all of the security he's put on our house? They would never get away with it. If they're as smart as you say they are, I don't think they'll try anything there. . ." She paused, "Besides, I'm pretty well known here, and I think they'll find that out too. People will notice if I go missing, and their righteous little asses won't remain that conspicuous if they don't do a good job at covering up. Charlie's a smart man. I don't think I'll have any problems at my home." She finished, crossing her arms; satisfied with her conclusion.

Of course she was right, I just hated admitting it. "Alright," I huffed. Then I sighed, softening my face. "Soyez prudents?" She quirked an eyebrow. "_Be careful_."

She nodded, and then pursed her lips. Her eyes grew a little wider at a thought she was having. "What about school?" She asked in almost a frightened whisper. Unlike her home, she didn't have a solution for this.

"That's what I was afraid about," I sighed, reaching my hands up to rub my temples. This day started out shit and didn't seem to be getting any better as it went on. I needed an aspirin. Or the whole fucking bottle.

Well she couldn't drop out – That was out of question or any negotiations. She had too much going on for her to take that route. Besides, it was college recruiting time and I'll be damned if she didn't get into a good college because of me.

I thought long and hard as she did the same, and finally came to a conclusion. I really could only see one option. It was one that I both dreaded, and loved. It would take a lot of fucking planning to make it work, but I saw it as the only semi-solution there could be.

"Bella," I stated carefully, "I think I'm gonna need to be a senior again."

She realized what I was saying and let out a long, deep breath, shaking her head a little in shock. "It's really that serious, isn't it?" she asked in an even lower whisper than before.

As much as I wanted to tell her it wasn't, I couldn't lie. I took an exasperated sigh and nodded once.

She let out a humorless chuckle. "I think I finally believe you." Shaking her head, she sighed, "No one would repeat high school again if it weren't life or death." I nodded grimly at her with a sad smile on my face. It was true.

"Okay, well then we're going to need to do this as soon as possible. Get your information, I mean. We'll need to start making calls right away so that you can start sooner, and–"

"See, that's where the hard part comes in." I interrupted her, the same time Emmett walked in the door.

"That's what she said," he chuckled loudly. I sent him a murderous glare.

Lowering my voice enough so that I wouldn't have to explain a shit-load of things to him, I gave Bella a pointed glance to do the same thing. "According to state records," I told her slowly, "I technically don't exist."

"You what?" She asked in a loud, surprised whisper.

"When my mom died," I said in a calm voice, "I hadn't met my father yet. I didn't want to go and live with some guy I had never met, or some fucked up orphanage, or have to deal with anything court related. After I testified against my uncle and he was proven guilty for the murder, I faked my own death for the state's sake, and went into hiding." I finished, "And then you know the rest."

Comprehension showed in her eyes, and I was relieved to not have to explain in further details.

"What are you two whispering about over there?" Emmett asked loudly from the chair, looking down at a pile of homework on his lap. Fortunately, Bella didn't have any today. It's not like she'd be doing it anyways though – We had bigger things to worry about.

"Fuck off, prick," I said a little too defensively. Bella gave me a disapproving glare while Emmett huffed loudly and went back to ignoring us. Being forward with him was always the best solution.

I focused back on Bella, who's face was very thoughtful. I waited for her to speak before saying anything else. After what seemed like ages, a strong emotion flickered across her hard mask. It looked a lot like determination to me.

"Okay," she finally said, pursing her lips and nodding. "I can take care of that."

God I loved this woman.

Bella stayed over that night – on my request – and was skipping school Wednesday so that we could get me into school faster. I was being overprotective, sure, but it's always better safe than sorry. Besides, this shit was serious.

She had called her parents to tell them she was spending the night at her friend Jessica's, and in the morning, called the school as her mother and told them her daughter was sick. She was fucking brilliant when it came to deception and plotting and shit.

She had stayed in the bedroom, and I had stayed out on the futon.

I wasn't sure why that had bothered me so much.

Jazz had also stayed over, crashing on the other couch in the room. He had left to pick up Alice before I even woke up that morning. Bella was prepared and had emergency clothes and shit stashed in her car, so there was no need to borrow anything. All of this occurring without a word from the Volturi.

I finally made myself began to wake up; slowly opening my eyes and running a hand through my messy hair. After a few minutes of adjusting to the light of the morning, I sat up.

Glancing at the clock, I realized that it was just passed nine o'clock. I reached lazily for the remote, flipping on the TV to some reruns of old morning sitcoms. Nothing good was ever on in the mornings.

I looked up as I heard Bella enter the room. She had thrown her hair up into a sexy, messy bun and was wearing a pair of librarian glasses. She was wearing a plain, dark blue, tight-fitting, long-sleeved shirt, and a pair of white skinnies.

It was fucking irritating how the sight of her always affected me so much. I had a feeling that even in the ugliest clothes ever, she'd still be the sexiest thing I'd ever seen. Pathetic Edward.

She shot me a sleepy smile and made her way over to where I was sitting. As she walked over, I studied her face for anything unusual. Her eyes were what upset me.

You could see the bags under them, even through the soft layer of make-up she had applied. They made it obvious that she had gotten little to no sleep last night. I had a pretty good guess as to why she had trouble sleeping. This was a fucking nightmare, and I knew she was trying to hide from it.

I should have done something last night – I regretted leaving her alone while she slept. I could tell she was afraid, and I could tell she was trying to hold herself together. Dammit, it wouldn't have even had to have been an intimate sleeping arrangement. Just _something_. Just having me _there_ so she knew she wasn't all alone.

I'd remember that next time.

"Morning," she smiled warmly at me.

"Hey," I smiled back.

"I was just gonna quick run and get us some cof–"

"Not today." I responded flatly. I wanted to make sure that she started taking the same precautions as me when she went out, but it was too early for that. They were probably bouncing off the fucking walls in excitement with the knowledge of her presence in my life. I wasn't going to just have her run off to a local place in town for a cup of coffee. It was too soon to start the sneaking around shit. Hiding was still the best option for her at the moment.

"Okay." She looked a little taken aback. "I'll just have some cereal then." I watched as she silently walked over to the kitchen, pouring herself a bowl of Fruit Loops and sitting down on a stool by herself with a glum expression on her face.

She was a social fucking butterfly – always out and about, always interacting with people.

It would take her a little while to get used to the solitude.

I took a shower while she ate and once I was finished I quickly ate a bowl myself also. She was sitting on the recliner with her pink laptop; her fingers already typing up a storm. She would type for a while, purse her lips a couple of times and then stop, adjust her glasses, then huff and start typing again. It was really the cutest thing.

She glanced at me from the corner of her eye, and like she knew what I was thinking, she bit her lip and held back a smile. She knew I was right. She was fucking _adorable_. If I told her that, I would probably get an eye roll.

A smirk slowly spread across my face as I decided to test my theory.

"Hey, Bee," I called to her across the room with a smile in my voice. She glanced up at me through her long lashes, raising an eyebrow. "You're fucking beautiful." I grinned with nothing but sincere honesty.

She reached up, theatrically sliding her glasses from her face while proceeding to give me a very emphasized eye roll.

Smirking even bigger than before, I walked my empty bowl over to the sink, laughing quietly to myself. Satisfied that my theory had been proven right, I think it was safe to say that I had hopped the awkward "giving compliments" hurdle.

I hadn't realized it until recently, but I was acting more normal than I had in years. It felt fucking fantastic. Now if only my life actually _was_ normal. Wouldn't that be something?

Even though the situation going on now was the farthest thing from normal, I decided to enjoy every pro there was, and try and forget all of the cons. Unfortunately, there really weren't many pros, and the cons were a majority of my life.

I wished they would just stay the hell away.

"Hey, smiley," Bella's voice interrupted my strange train of thoughts. "Do you have a printer somewhere in here?" I had been smiling to myself? Well that was a first. And weird.

I nodded, "In the back, why?"

"Because," she stated with a proud smile, "Your official documents are ready to go."

I led her to the storage room where I kept all my shit, which regrettably wasn't a lot. She hooked her laptop up with a cord, stuck some blank paper in the old printer and before I knew it, I was a certified citizen of the state.

"Shit, these are _legit_." I approved in awe. "How the hell do you _do_ that?" I asked as we walked back into the front room. She walked in front of me, carefully keeping the papers from bending or smearing.

She sat back down in the chair, removing her glasses and sticking them in her large purse. "Honey, I could show you classified things you never thought ever possible. I could print you out just about anything you wanted under any name, any age, or any race." She ended with a sweet smile. "It's what happens when your daddy protects the state."

Well damn. She knew what she was doing. I guess if this was going to end up happening, it was both good and bad that it had to have happened to Bella. She sure as hell was helpful in a lot of areas. She was also an innocent human being who didn't deserve to be put in such position.

Point was, I felt sorry for the bastard who ever tried to screw with _this_ girl.

She gave me a pointed glance like she knew what I was thinking. I shrugged at her. "What?"

She just shook her head. "Nothing." She set the papers down on the table and walked over to sit next to me on the futon. "Okay, so this is how it's going to work," she said sternly. "Your name at school is Masen Collins. Changing your name is the easiest explanation there is, and if the Volturi decide to snoop around in the records, they won't find anything unusual or relevant. You just moved here from a small town in Massachusetts, and maintain a 3.9 GPA. You don't have any siblings and your parents are Martin and Hanna Collins. Everything about your medical information is filled out, along with records from your previous school, security codes, date of birth, and so on." She smiled to herself, thoughtful. "They don't have any reason not to accept you."

I had never seen Bella this way – controlling, dominant, and witty. Of course the confidence was there too, but then again, that was _always_ there. The fact that she was completely in control of everything we did and knew what she was doing was an incredible turn-on.

"Why do I feel so insignificant when I'm with you?" I sighed, rolling my eyes and shaking my head. She playfully narrowed her eyes at me with a small smile at her lips. "Thank you, Bells. For everything."

"Why the hell are you thanking me? This was_ your_ idea to protect me. If anyone's thanking anyone, it should be me. Besides," A devious smirk filtered at her lips. "We haven't even gotten to the fun part yet."

She was right. Once she explained 'the fun part' to me, I had to laugh out loud, because it was so ridiculously brilliant, it'd work no matter what. I was starting to believe that this girl could pull off just about anything she set her mind to.

"Okay, so I'm going to call them in a little bit and set up the things I can over phone. Then, after lunch, we're going to need to make everything official and do things in person." She explained as she whipped out her iPhone.

I didn't even bother asking how she was going to manage pretending to be my mother, because I knew she'd be able to pull it off regardless of the fact that it was impossible.

She dialed the school's number and placed the phone skillfully between her ear and shoulder. Her fingers were busy typing away again. "Um, yes, hello?" She said in a nazzly, southern voice. "I would like to enroll my son, m'am. Would that be possible?" She coated her voice to also sound sugar-sweet.

She nodded, "Mmhmm. Well can you put him on then please?" she paused, waiting for the ladies response. "Thank you very much."

She pursed her lips as she waited to speak to the counselor, I was assuming. "Yes, you must be Mr. Snow? Hi, my name is Hanna Collins. My family and I just moved here from Minnesota and my son needs to get back into his classes."

I relaxed back into my seat, bringing my hands behind my head and shutting my eyes with a smile. We could totally handle this shit.

"Uh-huh, yes," she responded. "He's a senior." She paused again and began twirling a stray piece of hair that had escaped her pony tail. "He attended a small private school in St. Paul." I heard a man's loud voice on the other end of the line. "Yes, that school." she paused again as he said something else. "He's a good kid. Good grades, stays outta trouble."

There was another long pause of silence as I watched Bella nod and look absentmindedly around the room. "This afternoon would be just perfect. Masen and I would love to meet you." she winked at me, grinning. "Yes, one o'clock? That sounds just perfect. Yes, I'll bring all of his paper work." Before hanging up, she ended with a polite, "See you soon, Mr. Snow."

I just stared at her in pure amazement.

"Get used to it, Cullen." she smirked as she finally closed her laptop.

"How in the hell are you going to pretend to be a forty year-old woman?" I asked before she could give me anymore smug comments. I don't know what I was expecting her face to show – nerves, worry, maybe even defeat? Nope. Not at all. Because that wasn't _Bella_. Instead she was beaming at me. Fucking _glowing_.

"I've always wanted to do this," she whispered to herself, smiling and shaking her head. Looking up to meet my eyes, she went on to explain. "We're going to need to stop at my house. I have to get myself ready and believable." She picked up the papers on the table, organizing them into a neat pile. "Besides, I never said I had to be _forty_." she muttered to herself and me. "Maybe I was one of those crazy teens who got pregnant at thirteen?"

I rolled my eyes before becoming serious. "We shouldn't go to your house. . .What if they're watching?"

She gave me a skeptical look, raising an eyebrow. "That's sort of contradicting yourself a little, don't you think?" I waited for her to explain. "You told me they played fair in some aspects and kept to _some_ of their rules. _I_ thought you said they only 'hunted' if they told you they were."

Fuck, she was right again. In fact, the whole morning she had been making me feel like a mentally incapable four year-old.

Before I even had the chance to speak, she dove into another one of her 'I am a big girl and can protect myself' speeches. They always tended to earn a series of automatic eye rolls from me.

Because even if she may have been right to a certain degree and could do fancy confidential shit on her computer, she was no where near able to be keeping herself safe. She needed my help for that, deny it or not.

"Besides, if they happen to be 'watching' it's not like they aren't going to know where my house is anyways. I already told you," she waved her hand dismissively, "I'm _safe_ there."

Okay, so I decided that she had went way beyond a controlling freak. She was a controlling _bitch_. I had a pretty good guess as to why that was. On top of all the stress that had just been put on her shoulders, girls tended to have this problem around a certain time every month. Her mood swings and massive bitch-outs were proving my point right.

_Don't point out Alice's Midol_, I chanted to myself silently, d_o not point out the Midol_.

"Okay," I sighed, giving up arguing with her. "Let's do this then."

**BPOV**

Just because I was acting like a massive bitch didn't mean that everything I was saying was wrong. In fact, I happened to be able to think a lot clearer while I was in a prissy attitude, and knew that what I was saying was in fact _right_. Well, at least in my mind it was.

Edward's face showed mixed emotions. Like he wanted to hug the shit out of me and at the same time, rip my head out of its socket. I got that look a lot.

I knew that he was trying to do everything in my best interests; take extra precautions, keep an eye on me, and make I was safe at all times. Unfortunately for him, I was doing the opposite. For some reason, the only real important information my brain had processed after all of this was to do whatever I could that would be in _Edward's_ best interests.

Flawed logic, as he had so many times called it. He could say whatever he wanted, and it still wouldn't change a damn thing.

Once my mind was set on something, I couldn't just walk away from it. I had to _fix_ the problem all together before I could completely forget about it. Not that I wanted to forget about him after all of this was all said and done though. Quite the opposite, actually.

We ate a really early lunch so that we could leave earlier. I did everything at Edward's request before we left, even if it was completely unnecessary. It took us like a half an hour to get out the damn door.

His plan was just a _little_ more overly-complicated than it needed to be. Again though, I didn't say a thing.

I walked out to the car first – bundled up in a hat, mittens, a scarf, and sunglasses while he walked up to the corner a little over a block away. Even though I didn't _get_ what he was doing, I trusted that it was best to listen to him.

We sped to my house in silence. It was a comfortable silence though. A definite nice change from having to hear my own voice ramble on and on at a constant rate. I couldn't help it sometimes. I just _couldn't_.

As we pulled up into the long drive Edward furrowed his brow. "Where are your parents again?"

I sighed. "My mom's out for the day with some friends – shopping and movies and stuff. My dad's working, doing what he always does, so who knows when he'll be home. He's always gone." My voice tightened a little when I said this. I guess I was still just a little bitter over the ease of a close family I had witnessed at Jasper's house last night.

I led him through the garage door and Laurent greeted us in the kitchen. "Oh, hello, Miss Bella! I wasn't expecting any of you until dinner. . ." He looked down at the food he was in the middle of preparing.

I smiled sweetly at him. "I have a couple of free periods today. Laurent, this is my friend Edward. Edward, this is Laurent." They exchanged an awkward handshake which made me stifle a giggle.

"Listen, I just gotta grab a few things from my room and we'll be outta here in a half an hour." I told them both. Edward nodded wearily while giving me a questioning look. "You can just hang in the living room and watch some TV till I'm done, alright?"

Once I showed him to the home-theater and handed him the remote, I hurried upstairs to get ready.

I opened up my wardrobe and pursed my lips. This would definitely be a challenge. Then I remembered I had a business outfit Renee had once gotten me a few months ago for college interviews. _Perfect_.

It was a gray pencil skirt with a matching suit top. Under it, I selected a light pink collared shirt. I squeezed myself into a small push-up bra while unbuttoning the first three buttons of my pink shirt. An overwhelming amount of cleavage was poking out, but that's what I wanted. I was dealing with a guy after all. And didn't all guys who worked at a school have this crazy-weird fantasy about being fucked by one of their students' moms? It's not like it was actually going to come down to that though.

It didn't matter if that was the case or not – I was going with desperate measures and using the sex-kitten approach. Edward would get into this school with not a single problem at all if I had anything to do about it.

After I had it on, I rummaged through a box of miscellaneous things Charlie had given me a while back. It was just a bunch of undercover stuff I thought I'd have no use for. I took a mental note to thank him later.

I found the perfect blond wig; it was curly and completely realistic. After taking five minutes to make sure I had it on and adjusted just right, I flopped down onto the chair in front of my make-up desk. I eventually decided to go eighties. Bright red lipstick, smoky eyeshadow. It was perfect really.

As the final touches, I found a pair of blue contacts to pop in my eyes, slid on my reading glasses, and threw on a pair of the highest heels I owned. I gave myself a satisfied once-over in my full length mirror, pleased with what I had accomplished.

I walked down the stairs, swaying my hips and getting into character as I went. My heels clicked loudly as soon as they hit the tiled floor. I made my way over to the living room to get approved by Edward.

I walked in, standing at the door way and clearing my throat. His head slowly turned away from the TV and to where I was standing. His jaw dropped to the floor at my appearance. So loud, you could practically hear the loud _pop_!

Priceless, really.

I twirled around for him. "How do I look?"

I saw him gulp and shift in his seat. "Bang-able."

I smiled smugly while turning to walk out of the room. "That's the idea, Edward." I said in almost an eye roll. "Desperate times call for desperate measures." I heard him get up and follow behind me.

Poor boy. The whole car ride was an uncomfortable mess. I could feel his constant stare always on me, but never found it in me to be bothered by it. In fact, I maybe even liked it a little. I liked that he saw me _that_ way too. At least it was obvious that he found me attractive; he had called me fucking beautiful before, and he could not stop fidgeting in his seat.

Of course, I had my hundred dollar Victoria's Secret bra to thank for that.

I pulled into the parking lot, aware that I should have been in Trig that very moment. "What if they recognize you?" Edward asked in a tight voice. "Then we're fucked."

The frequency of my eye rolling today was almost laughable. "Look at me." I gestured up and down my body with my hand as we stepped out of the Volvo. "Would _you_ have recognized me?"

He seemed to accept that. "Do you have the papers?" He asked in a condescending tone. I think he was beginning to doubt this plan more and more, even though it was _his_ to begin with. It wasn't my fault that I fixed all of the flaws in it. He'd just have to learn to eventually accept the fact that I was capable of doing things just as much as he was.

"Yes, I have them." I mumbled almost irritably as I clicked the buzzer at the front door. Moments later, they were opening automatically for us. I walked at a brisk pace towards the office while he followed next to me.

"Remember, follow my lead and go with what I say." I muttered to him before he opened the office door and held it for me.

"Don't worry," he sighed with equal annoyance, running a hand through his hair. "I've given up arguing with you, Mommy-dearest."

I gave him a cheeky smile before stepping inside.

The secretary whose name I always forgot was sitting half-asleep at her desk. I cleared my throat loudly while Edward chuckled under his breath. He was very amused by Bitch-Bella. "Excuse me, M'am?" I said in my high southern voice. "I'm lookin' for a Mr. Snow? The counselor? I've got an appointment."

As soon as I said this, Mr. Snow stepped out of the door to his office at the mention of his name. His reaction mirrored the one similar to what Edward's had been. It was just as amusing the second time around. He hurried over to Edward and I, eagerly reaching out to shake my hand.

"You must be Mrs. Collins," He said eagerly with a large smile plastered to his face.

With a devious smile, I slowly slid my hand away from his. "_Ms_. Collins." I corrected, holding back a smirk. All too easy. I knew in that moment, this poor man in front of me would have given me anything in the whole damn world to make me happy.

Anything including letting Edward in without any trouble.

I sent him a warm smile as he shook hands with Edward as well. "This must be Masen, huh?" He asked, not caring whether the answer was yes or no either way. I gave him a cute nod, fluttering my eye lashes.

"Pleasure to meet you, sir." Edward said in a flawlessly polite voice. "It'll be an honor to be apart of this wonderful establishment." Kiss-ass. Well I guess he learned from the best. Like mother like son, I suppose. I shot him a satisfied smile before Mr. Snow patted him on the back.

"You have all of the paperwork, correct?" He asked me with appraising eyes. I nodded again, holding back my grimace. I swore, if one more person asked me if I had that damn paperwork, I'd be ripping off their head. "Masen, you can wait in one of those chairs. Your mom and I will go over your paperwork and discus your possible transfer, alright?"

"Alright, sir." He nodded obediently, gracefully flopping down into an open waiting chair.

He then turned to me with another wide smile. "Right this way, Ms. Collins," he instructed. "I'll see what I can do for you."

That innuendo was about as hidden as the fact that global warming did exist.

Not even Edward had missed the double meaning behind his words. I heard his quiet snickers as I followed closely behind the man who was under the impression that I was ten years older than I actually was.

Like I said, _all too easy_.

* * *

**CHAPTER SONG: **More Than Useless - Relient K

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Soyez Prudents _- "be careful"

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**Reviews are better than Emmett's innuendos.**


	10. Salope

**Gah, I adore you guys.  
You and your reviews, I tell ya.  
Pretty sure I'd send you all boxes of chocolate if I could.  
Trust me, I really would.**

**So I apologize in advance at how all-over-the-place this chapter is.  
It's basically a set up leading up to the next, which I assure you, will be worth it.  
Either way, tell me what you think? Please?**

**Oh, and my new years resolution is to respond to your reviews more.  
Really. I'm going to get on top of that eventually, I promise.  
So if for some reason I don't respond one week, don't think I'm ignoring you. I'm just busy.  
But like I said - I'M GONNA START AS OF NOW.**

--Justine.

* * *

**Bella - Salope**

"Will you please stop fidgeting?" I complained, "You're worse than a kid on Christmas."

"I can't help it," he mumbled distractedly, "I'm not sure if I should be nervous or not. . .Tell me about your school?" He asked, staring absentmindedly out the window as we drove to school.

I sighed, diving into every detail he needed to know.

After a long, kissing-up talk with Mr. Snow yesterday, he had agreed to start Edward immediately. Unfortunately, to him immediately meant next week. I ended up getting him to let Edward shadow someone until he actually started. When he had asked Edward if he knew anyone or if there was anyone in particular that he wanted to follow around, Edward caught on quickly and responded with no one other than Bella Swan herself.

We made a great team, him and I.

I pulled into the busy parking lot, pulling into my usual front and center spot. Oddly enough, it was always kept open for me. I turned off the car and turned to face Edward. He was picking at the sleeves of his shirt, staring down at his lap.

I sighed. "_Edward_." He looked up at me through his long lashes. "You'll be with me the whole day. You don't even have to do anything yet. Stop worrying so much, everything will be just fine." I told him in a soft voice. I grabbed his hand, giving it a tight squeeze before letting it go and stepping out of the car.

I waited for him on the sidewalk as he got out as well, walking over to my side. He looked perfect, just like he always did. His usual sex-hair in a messy disarray, his bright green eyes always noticeable from miles away. He had the slight punk look going on; black skinny jeans that weren't too tight or too loose, and a faded plaid shirt – sleeves rolled up to just before his elbows – that suited him quite nicely against his lean but muscular form.

He was, as he had so graciously put it yesterday, quite bang-able.

The first warning bell rang as we walked through the front doors of the school. There were a lot of stares as we walked through the hallways together, but that was only because our school wasn't very interesting and any mention of a new student was known news to everyone.

I got the usual waves and smiles from passing boys, but it was Edward who was getting all of the attention. Girls were batting their eyelashes as he walked by, giggling to each other and smiling at him. He really didn't seem to notice.

We walked into the office to check him in. "Isabella," the secretary smiled as I walked up to the counter. "And you must be Masen?" she asked Edward. He nodded, giving her a crooked smile. I rolled my eyes. Just because it had that affect on woman didn't mean he had to use it every damn minute.

She looked a little baffled as she turned around to hand him his schedule. "This is for next week," she told him in a breathless voice. "For today and tomorrow you will just be following Ms. Swan around."

"Yes, ma'am." He nodded again, taking the papers from her.

Before we left, we looked through his schedule. Sure enough, Mr. Snow had conveniently placed him in all of the same classes as me. I allowed myself to smile at that, remembering my motives behind the whole arrangement in the first place.

We walked up to the second floor for my first class – Biology. Edward remained glued at my side and silent the whole time. I wanted nothing more than to hear what was running through his head. This all must have been so strange for him; he hadn't been around a ton of people in a long time.

Mr. Berty was preparing his lecture for the day as we approached him. I cleared my throat politely and he immediately looked up from what he was doing. "Bella," he smiled warmly, "What can I do for you, my dear?"

I gestured towards Edward. "This is Masen Collins," I said with confidence. "He's starting here next week, and he's going to be shadowing me for the rest of this week."

He looked over at Edward, holding out a hand. "Mr. Collins," he approved, "It's a pleasure to have you in my class, son." Edward nodded back with a smile.

Tyler sat at my table with me, so Edward ended up having to pull a chair up next to me. I was not about to make him go and sit in the empty seat next to Lauren. Not on his first day – that would be just cruel.

As always, Tyler sent me a large grin when I sat down. "Bella," he said happily, "Always glad I have you to look at first thing in the morning." I rolled my eyes as I took out my books. Tyler was my always hopeful, golden retriever, puppy dog.

Edward remained silent next to me as Tyler proceeded with trying to start a conversation. "Who's the dude?" He asked in a curious whisper, gesturing his eyes at Edward. "I don't recognize him."

"Oh," I stated, elbowing Edward in the shoulder. He turned himself towards the both of us, looking almost annoyed. "Masen, this is Tyler Crowley. Tyler, this is Masen Collins. He's new."

Tyler extended a hand that Edward eventually took. "Nice to meet you," he stated curtly.

Why was he acting like this? Where was the sweet, adorable boy I spent all of my afternoons with? The bell rang in that moment, and I turned my head to give Edward a questioning look. He just shrugged it off, shaking his head while proceeding to stare directly towards the front of the room.

My next class wasn't as bad. He seemed less tense and more at ease. I wondered if that had anything to do with the fact that I no longer shared a table with a guy. I wanted to roll my eyes. The thought of him being jealous was almost laughable. We weren't even together.

Lunch rolled along and as we walked into the cafeteria, I began debating on how I should handle this. Jessica would be a handful, no doubt. If I brought him to my usual table he would be eaten alive, molested with words, and shamelessly eye-fucked the entire time. I shuddered at the thought, feeling sorry for him already.

"Masen?" I asked, using that name for the sake of possible listeners.

"Hm?" He mumbled, sounding distracted as we stood in the salad line. His lack of any conversation at all was starting to piss me off. Maybe I _should_ make him sit with the hyenas. Maybe he'd benefit from some sort of interaction.

"My friends are going to be a little. . .excited about you." He raised an eyebrow, still not looking at me. I narrowed my eyes in the slightest bit, pursing my lips. "Just a warning." He brought this upon himself – not my problem if he didn't listen.

Once we each got a lunch, I led him over to my table. It was already half filled so I found a spot with an open one next to it. I avoided any stares just yet as I sat down. I could tell Edward was doing the same, staring down at the table while also shooting me sideways glances.

I sighed, deciding to just get this over with.

"Ladies," I began, my voice dripping with unnecessary condescension. "This is Masen." I didn't have the energy to go through all of their names and introduce each one of them to him. I was fairly positive that he didn't give a shit either way.

Right before the swarming and swooning began, I mouthed him a sincere, "Sorry."

"Well aren't you the cutest thing, sweetie!" Lauren exclaimed while the others all jumped right on agreeing with her, murmuring their pleased comments. He allowed them one of his infamous crooked smiles to satisfy them all before quick shooting me a grimace and looking back down at his food.

Jess, sitting on the other side of Edward, wrapped both arms around his, leaning into his side. "Honey," she purred, "Whatever you're doing with these," she referred to his bicep muscles, "keep doing it."

They all let out gleeful giggles as I rolled my eyes, unusually pissed off. Were all of their voices always so high and irritating? Why was I just noticing this now?

Edward remained silent again, but this time, I didn't blame him. "So, Masen," Kate began in an attempt to start a conversation, "What brings you to the comforts of our table? Are you new here? How do you know Bella?"

I shot him an exhausted pointed glance, indicating to him that he could be the one answering questions this time. These girls were a headache just waiting to happen.

"I'm starting here next week," he explained. It really wasn't his fault that his voice was incredibly too sexy for his own good – when he talked, the table erupted into another fit of small, pleased giggles. Ignoring them, he went on. "I'm shadowing Bella, so that's how I know her." He shot me a grin and just because I could, I smiled back happily at him.

Jess elbowed me in the shoulder. "So he's available then?" She said in a purposely loud whisper.

"Yes," I said in a tight voice, "He's available."

Maybe Edward and I should have thought into our plan a little more. Maybe we should have made up a fake story about how him and I were dating and madly in love. Not only would that give me an excuse to be even closer to him all of the time, it'd also get these crazy-ass girls out of his hair. It was a win-win for both of us, really.

Too bad I didn't think of it sooner.

I slumped further into my seat as the rest of lunch dragged on in an unbearable pace.

"Well that was interesting." Edward stated simply as we walked out the doors of the school and to the Volvo. I couldn't have agreed more. Interesting was really the only word to describe it. It was over, at least.

I nodded in agreement, ignoring the stares we were _still_ getting as we walked across the parking lot. I was walking with a cute boy. Get the fuck over yourselves, people.

As we approached the Volvo, Jake was parked in the spot next to us, about to get into his car as well. His eyes flashed to mine with a small smile, but were soon on Edward. He furrowed his eye brows together with a curious gaze as he paused momentarily. "Edward?" He asked in an awestruck tone. "Edward Cullen?"

Edward's head involuntarily snapped up, and before he could even respond to his name I was shooting him the most profound warning looks I could manage. With my wide eyes, I was instructing him silently to _not_ blow our cover.

All I wanted to know was how the hell Jacob even knew Edward in the first place. What are the odds? Of _course_ he would be the one person to recognize someone who technically wasn't suppose to even exist.

Instead of responding to his real name, he looked back at Jake with a questioning stare. He rose an eyebrow with believable surprise. "Excuse me?" He asked him.

Jake was now looking a little unsure of his assumption. He hesitated for a moment in awkward silence. "Aren't you. . .Edward?" He asked, less confident than he had started out to be.

I felt bad for making Edward fly solo on this one, so I quickly stepped in. "Jake, this is _Masen_." I corrected in a hard but friendly voice. "Masen Collins. He's new here, and I'm showing him around town." Why did I have the instinct to laugh out loud whenever I said his fake name? It was just amusing I guess, because even if it was his middle name, I could _never_ see Edward as being a Masen.

Jacob's face fell slightly at my comment. "Oh." He said in a disappointed tone. "Sorry, man," he quickly apologized to Edward. "Thought you were an old friend." Edward nodded with sympathy, though his eyes were far off and I knew that familiar thoughts were running through his head.

"No problem," he quickly responded with a half-grin.

Jake looked down at his feet awkwardly. "Well. . .I guess I'll let you guys go." He said in an uncomfortable voice. I allowed him a small wave as he got into his car and drove off.

As soon as we got into the Volvo and were pulling out of the parking lot, I let my questions flow freely. "How the hell do you know Jacob Black?" I demanded, still completely surprised by all of this.

Edward shrugged as he decided to match my tone. "I didn't know that Jacob _Black _was the crazy ex you're always referring to!" He said, equally defensive. "Otherwise I would have said something. . ." he grumbled quietly to himself.

We would get nowhere with this conversation unless one answered the other's questions first. I sighed, realizing that it would have to be me to began. He was the stubborn one. "Yes, Jacob Black was the ex-boyfriend I'm always referring to with Alice." I pursed my lips. "I didn't realize you remembered the name. How did you even know that that's who it was?"

He shrugged again, but I could tell that there was much more to the story than his casual shrug. "Before the incident," he began in a reserved tone. "I used to go to this small private school in this small town about a half hour from Chicago. Jake and I were like best friends up until sixth grade when I left to go to France with my mom for a couple of years. I never saw him after that. . ."

I smiled to myself, thoroughly satisfied with the answer I had gotten. Edward never realized that he always unintentionally ended up telling me more than he initially planned on.

I realized I was being the biggest bitch lately. All he was doing was trying to help and protect me. What was I doing in return? Insisting that I didn't need said help, throwing in snide comments here and there, and bothering him till no end about his tragically broken past.

_Way to go, Bella_. _Those methods will definitely get you far_.

The least I could do was tone down my ridiculous tantrums around him. I wasn't usually this bitchy though – it was that time of the month. And I think he knew it too. Otherwise he would have probably kicked me out on the street a long time ago. At least, that's what I would have done if _I_ were him.

My resolution – starting now – was to be nicer and more grateful for having him around. Sometimes I really didn't understand what got into me. I promised myself I would learn to control it better from now on though.

Feeling like I had lifted a weight from my shoulders, I let out a relieved sigh.

"So," Edward hedged, trying to come off as bored, but not succeeding in the least. He was far too interested in the conversation than entirely necessary. "Why did you two break up anyways?"

I was about to snap at him, when I remembered my new goal. I took a deep, long breath just to be sure I wouldn't explode, resulting in one of my infamous bitch-outs. Those were not pleasant. At all. He would no – he's experienced several of them.

I got asked this question all of the time. People always expected it to be such a interesting, confusing, long story. It really wasn't. It was actually pretty simple.

I sighed. "I know your expecting some elaborate, far-fetched answer. I really can't give you one." I glanced at him only to find his green eyes staring intently at me. They were too pretty. I couldn't drive or think while he was looking at me like that. I quickly looked away again. "I guess I just lost interest over time. I mean, he just sort of. . .changed after a while. It was like he thought of me as more of a possession or something. I don't know, I guess I felt too claustrophobic in the relationship."

He no longer had that serious look on his face. Instead, it was like he was trying to hold back a smug smile. "So your afraid of commitment is basically what your saying then, right?"

"I am not!" I quickly snapped back at him, narrowing my eyes defensively.

His quiet snickering made me grip the steering wheel tightly in frustration. That was not the case. I knew myself better than anyone to know that his accusation was not right. It was just that Jake got too clingy, that's all. I was not afraid of commitment.

At all.

I knew I wasn't.

At least, I thought I wasn't. . .

"What makes you think so?" I decided to respond in an irritated voice. "How do you know that my explanation isn't a valid enough reason for dumping him?"

I glanced over at him – he was pursing his lips with a thoughtful expression on his face. A few moments of silence passed before he finally spoke. "Okay," he began in a matter-of-fact tone. "The way you act around people is what gives you away. You walk around with nothing but confidence and sureness of yourself. At least, that's what you make people think. You don't let people see into you. On the inside, you crave for company. You're terrified to be alone, so you constantly need someone to be there for you. You're also afraid to get too close to someone. You're afraid that if you do, you'll be crushed in the end, and that confidence will never be there again – you're afraid that trust will eventually become your downfall."

I was speechless with his conclusion. Not because it was far-off, but because it was spot on. I blinked a couple of times, shaking my head. "How do you know that?" I whispered in a shaky breath.

He didn't speak until I finally locked my eyes with his. They were piercingly heartbreaking, only for once, completely vulnerable. Completely free of any walls from blocking me out from the miles and miles of deep green, going straight into his soul.

"Because," he responded in a whisper. "That's how I am too."

**Edward**

I would be lying if I said that those first two days were enjoyable. Quite the opposite really. They actually made me appreciate finishing high school online, and that was definitely a first.

At the same time though, nothing unpredictable ever occurred there. Except running into Jacob Black, of course. Bella acted just as I expected her too. Everyone responded to her just the way I knew they would. All of the guys looked at her, just like I had predicted from the start.

After that first day, I handled all of the ogling a lot better. Not just from my end, but from Bella's as well. The girls here were annoying as hell, and I wondered how Bella even stood them. Their constant staring and giggling drove me up a fucking wall.

The same could be said with all of the guys as well. They were all the same – immature, naïve, and disrespectful. Granted, I'd be the same way too if my life had ended up normal. But it hadn't, and this was reality. So when every class we went to containing multiple guys having obvious fantasies about Bella while the teacher lectured on, I was a little tense.

Bella and her mother were seated about four tables down from us. She had told me earlier that day her and her mom had dinner plans. I debated with her a short bit about canceling and how it was a risk, but of course, she was completely against that.

So instead we came to this compromise. I brought Al and Jazz with me to this fancy little restaurant that none of our asses could afford. Well, other than a couple of fancy, over-priced milkshakes.

She had asked me at first if I wanted to just join her and her mom all together, but I quickly denied. I wasn't about to enter the fickle path of touch and go with her mom judging on whether Bella and I were an item or not. Because her mom definitely seemed like the judging type.

Besides, I wanted her life to go on normally, without me constantly in her presence.

Saturday Bella went shopping with Emmett. Why? I had no clue until the next thing I knew, Em was hauling in a brand fucking new futon in my _house_. I then understood why she took Emmett along and not me – I did not approve of her throwing away more money because of me when she had already wasted so much on my account already.

On the plus side, I had gotten to see her in her little blond disguise again. Em never questioned any of that shit, just following along in Bella's stride as she ordered him where to put it.

At first I had been sad to get rid of the old one, but eventually gave in to her countless puppy-dog pouts. Admittedly, once I felt the new one, I no longer felt sorry about the other one. She had gone all the way and gotten a full-out tempurpedic futon. I didn't even know they _made_ those. After that, she had gone home to spend some time with her dad. I didn't protest because I knew she would be safe with him around.

Sunday was a bad day. I had woken up early morning to the irritating rings of my cell phone. It hadn't been hard to guess who had been calling me.

So I had ended up making a call to Bella's at seven in the morning – which was far too early – instructing her to get her ass over immediately. If they were hunting, there was no way in hell I was gonna let her out of my sight until the day was over.

She had driven her Volvo like I told her, completely sleep-deprived, drawing her hood up over her head while wearing a pair of over-sized sunglasses and parking two blocks away.

When she had taken off her glasses as soon as she got inside, her eyes were red and puffy, and I knew she had been crying. As soon as she had gotten in, she crashed on the couch, going back to bed before I even had time to ask.

She stayed over night Sunday and again, I was too big of a pussy to ask to sleep with her. This time though, we both slept out in the main room. That was progress, wasn't it?

Monday morning rolled around and I was absolutely dreading school. I took back saying I needed more to do – Now my evenings would be occupied with a lot of unnecessary stress and a shit-load of homework. Great.

Bella was even less thrilled than I had been.

She refused to get up at the trilling of the alarm clock. Rubbing my eyes and running my hands through my hair, I got up and walked over to her sleeping form. "Bella," I yawned, "Get up."

She groaned loudly, pulling her blanket completely over herself, shaking her head while remaining in her comfortable position. Rolling my eyes, I lightly shook her. "Wake up, Princess." I said in a sarcastically annoyed tone.

She refused once again, rolling over so that she was facing away from me. Instead of trying to pry her from the couch, I decided to take my shower first. Once I was finished and fully dressed, I walked back out to find her in the same position I had left her in.

This was ridiculous.

And there I was a couple of weeks back, thinking that she was this bright and happy morning person. I picked up my pillow, throwing it at her sleepy form with not too much force. "Get your lazy ass outta bed, Bee." I smirked loudly as she groaned once again, finally sitting up and scrunching her eyes open.

We pulled into the school parking lot, and the stares were just as bad as they had been last Thursday. Couldn't people get over themselves? I _really_ wasn't that interesting.

By Wednesday, the stares eventually died down. My fan club, on the other hand, did not. It was led by Bella's supposed 'best friend', Jessica Stanley. I had seen oranges with less color than her face. It was quite ridiculous, along with her loyal band of desperate followers.

Bella was quite amused by the whole thing. Especially when I'd use her as my shield to hide behind.

One day, I had made the mistake of saying something French to Bella in front of them. Of course, they would not get off my fucking back until I would say another word. I cleverly responded, "salope," to each in every one of them in different tones of affection. When asked what it meant, I quickly responded with "beautiful." They couldn't stop squealing and giggling.

Little did they know that beautiful was the last thing I would actually call them. Try another word that started with a B. Bella was quite amused when I had told her the actually meaning of the word.

"So, Edward," Carmen pressed herself to my left side. I cringed into Bella, who was on my right side. "You should really come with us to the mall this Sunday. Like, there's gonna be so many people there, and we'd all like love to have you, ya know?" According to Bella, these girl's lives consisted of two things: shopping, and money.

I continued thanking my lucky stars that Bella wasn't like that.

Thursday was another bad day. They had texted me during the middle of World History, and I had no choice but to be tense and on the edge of my seat the whole day. I half expected them to come here and kidnap her. I was still trying to determined whether they were now after Bella, or still just me. I hoped to God it was still me.

On top of all of that, I had to deal with Jake's longing stares directed at Bella all day. Well, his and twenty other guys. It was frustrating till no end, even though it shouldn't have bothered me so much. I'd be lying if I said it didn't though. A lot.

Ever since last week when I had accused Bella of being afraid of loneliness and commitment, she had gotten a lot quieter since then. It was either because she agreed with my words and the truth scared her, or she wanted to be in denial for as long as she could.

I knew I was right though. Like I had told her – I was like that as well.

It was an oddly comforting fact, knowing I wasn't the only one like that. Granted, we were both like that because of completely different reasons, but still. Having someone to relate to after having no one for so long tended to raise my spirits just a bit.

Thursday was Bella's bad day. It was a mixture of too much stress and irritation with the world, topped off by the anxiety of knowing that the Volturi were hunting.

I could tell this because as always, she was trying to do the exact opposite her emotions showed. She distracted herself by talking to literally everyone in the hallway, starting up conversations to me about pointless things, and wearing a big, fake smile the entire time.

She even decided it'd be a good idea to throw a party tomorrow night.

I was less than thrilled when she had told me about it. I held in my complaints though, knowing she'd just get even more upset if I expressed my disliking of the idea. I wanted to humor her so she could feel better about this whole damn hiding thing.

I really didn't want her to have one though, so without actually expressing my complaints, I cleverly disguised it as concerned questioning.

"What about your parents?" I asked, knitting my eyebrows together as we walked to lunch. "Don't you think they'll not be too thrilled with the idea of having a hundred wild teens trashing their house?"

She waved a hand, rolling her eyes. "Edward, _please_. They could care less, in fact, they like the aspect of social interactions involving large gatherings. They're out of town this weekend anyways on a business trip for Charlie."

Well damn. I was beginning to run out of subtle hints begging her not to have this party. "Doesn't that seem like too much work though? I mean, you won't have much time to plan it or anything. Just have someone else have it at their house." I suggested in a hopeful tone.

Of course, she just flat out refused that idea as well. "That's ridiculous! I have the best party house there is. Besides, people count on me throwing the good parties. I don't need much time to get the house ready, so it's no big deal."

The way her eyes kept darting anywhere but mine was another dead giveaway that I had been right about the whole 'covering up her real emotions' thing. Because she knew as well as I did that if I looked into her eyes, I'd be able to decipher that hidden emotion just perfectly.

Though, I did have a few pretty good ideas as to what it could have been. It really wasn't hard to guess what had her so anxious and frustrated all of the time.

I could no longer hide my desires not to go. "Do you want me there?" I asked in a glum tone, hoping she'd give me a more creative answer than just a simple yes. I didn't get why I had to be there.

"Of course!" She quickly responded with a smile, "Why wouldn't I want you there?" I shrugged. "I want you, Jazz, Rose, Al, and Em there too! Will you invite them for me?"

I rose an eyebrow. "You'll see them tonight, won't you?" She always came over after school.

She shook her head remorsefully. "My dad's taking my mom and me out to dinner before they leave. And I guess I have a party to plan after that," she grimaced a little, and once again, I silently questioned her motives behind having it.

I sighed, nodding in defeat with the whole thing as we walked over to our normal table, though I was less than thrilled to have to deal with the plastics at the moment. I had zero tolerance for any bullshit what so ever, and those girls' lives were _based_ around bullshit.

Bella must have read that in my face, because she suddenly halted, steering us in a different direction to an empty table. I gave her a graciously genuine smile as we sat down by ourselves.

We began eating our food in silence. I glanced over at the table we usually sat, noticing all of their eyes darting to us every now and then. I almost wanted to snort. They were nothing without their fearless leader.

"Why are you even friends with them?" I asked – a question that had been in my head since day one here.

She tried to hide a grimace, but ended up just shrugging the whole thing off. "I don't know, I guess." Was her incredibly detailed response.

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously, Bee. Anyone in the whole school would die at the chance to be your friend. Why do you pick them? You're so much better." Sometimes I couldn't stop the truth from escaping my mouth.

She seemed appreciative of what I said though, so I didn't regret it. "Thanks," she mumbled, looking back down at her food with what seemed like almost a blush.

As my eyes continued to roam, I noticed Jacob Black glancing over in our direction as well. His eyes were on Bella, as always, with a wary stare. It was obvious that he missed the shit out of her. It relieved me that she never gave him that look back, obviously over the whole relationship.

At first I had been completely surprised by the whole reasoning behind their break-up, just like Bella said I would. I had been expecting this long, meaningful story and all I had gotten was 'she lost interest'. Yeah right. I knew high school relationships better than to think that was the actual case.

I sighed. "Bella," she slowly brought her eyes up to meet mine for the first time that day. What I saw certainly didn't surprise me. Her big brown eyes gazed sadly into mine. It didn't take a rocket scientist to see what was going on here. "You cannot possibly have a party and spend all of your time trying to make a bunch of people happy while you're not happy yourself."

She continued to hold my gaze with a thoughtful expression. "Why not?" She challenged, rather than denying my words once again.

"Because," I said in a low voice, "It's unbearable for me to watch."

Bella was the girl who always had some sort of response to everything. Whether it was a clever comeback, a disagreement, or a passionate subject on the topic, she always had something to respond with. For the first time I had ever known her, she was out of words.

We ate the rest of our lunches in silence, and it almost seemed like she was fighting off tears. If we weren't in a crowded lunch room, I totally would have held her. I learned from early on that it was what she liked.

The whole time she was thinking deeply to herself about something. I refused to let my curiosity get the better of me, and left her the hell alone. The last thing I wanted was her to be pissed at me.

So I kept my mouth shut, figuring my words would only do more harm than good.

As we were about to get up and leave the cafeteria, she finally looked up and met my eyes once again. "I'm having the party tomorrow," she said in a guarded tone and a serious expression on her face. As I held her gaze, I watched her seriousness slowly fade into warmth. There was apparently something about my stare that calmed her down.

And I knew that I had to go to this damn thing. Because for some reason, I could tell that this party was important to her. After all I had put her through in the past few weeks, it was the least I could do.

I cracked a small smile. "Okay, I'm in."

* * *

**CHAPTER SONG: **Misery Loves Its Company - Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

_Fits with Bella at the moment, does it not? I think it does. In fact, Edward works with it pretty damn well too._

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Salope _- "bitch"

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	11. Simplement Incroyable

**Against my better judgement, I have gotten a twitter.  
My username or whatever is __simplydazzling_.  
Follow me so I don't feel like a looser for having one?**

**So I literally rewrote this flippin' chapter like four times.  
Yes. Four. Why? Because I've got major OCD issues, people.  
And I'm not talking about "obsessive Cullen disorder", I'm talking about the compulsive shit.  
Hope it was worth it? Let me know?  
Do you think we can reach 300 reviews this chapter? I hope so. :D**

**Hell, no one's going to read anything else I write here, so I'll stop.  
Enjoy, m'loves.**

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**Edward - Simplement Incroyable**

Bella had insisted on the five of us coming to her damn party. I was the only one who was really opposed to it. Everyone else was bouncing with excitement as we pulled up to her house in Emmett's old beat-up jeep.

By the way things had been going lately, I was curious as to what Bella's motives behind throwing a party were. She promised me that it was something she usually did, and though I did believe her, I also knew she had been way too stressed for her own good lately.

Then it dawned on me. Maybe _that_ was why she was having this party. I had implied something like that to her, but she never confirmed it or not. So that she could be normal again, and just for a night forget about the demons in my life who were hunting her.

I was coming to humor her, but it wasn't my ideal scene. It's not like I went to parties all that often, after all. Come to think of it, this was my first high school party. How fucking pathetic it was that I was already out of high school. I sighed quietly to myself as we walked up her massive front stairs.

I wasn't looking forward to seeing everyone from school. I had only been at that damn place for a little over a week and I was already being stalked by half the female population. I honestly did not see the appeal. What the hell was attractive about me? If only they could see passed my outsides, and into my insides – then they would know how ugly I really was.

After they had each gotten out their comments on how ridiculously huge her house was, Jazz was about to knock on the door politely when Em rolled his eyes and just opened it right up. I then had to roll _my_ eyes, shaking my head. Emmett will be Emmett.

As soon as the large doors were open, music blasted from the speakers throughout the house, and the hammer of the base caused the house to feel almost like it was rattling. I couldn't help but smile. Being here always eased any previous tension, party or not.

"This place is fucking insane!" Emmett hollered over the music in approval.

It was true. There were every kind of different lights set up around the place – strobe lights, disco lights, black lights. It truly was a sight to behold. Then again, when did Bella _ever_ do things halfway?

Speaking of her, I began to wonder what she was up to. There were over two-hundred people here for sure, and more continued to pile in through the door. Alice squealed in delight as she also took in her surroundings.

She then quickly pulled Jazz through the many people. I watched as they both disappeared, imaging that they were probably finding a good place to dance and shit.

Emmett had also wandered off, and Rose and I stood off to the side of the door. "Em's right," Rose actually sounded excited. "This girl does _not_ disappoint." Just as she said this, Bella appeared out of nowhere.

_Holy fucking hell_.

Those were the only words that seemed to be running through my mind as I took her appearance in.

Her luxurious brown hair was in a mess of wild, teased curls just begging me to run my hands through. Her dress was strapless and tight-fitting, hugging every inch of her body perfectly – it only reached down to just above mid-thigh. It was a light silver and it sparkled like a diamond in all of the different lights.

She had on white boots that went up just barely below her knees, along with three-inch heels at the bottom. Her make-up was done to match the dress; Her eyeshadow was a light, white color and she had on just the perfect amount of eyeliner and mascara to highlight the perfection of her creamy eyes.

She was fucking beautiful.

But I knew that already.

She laughed at my expression, doing a once-around twirl for me, letting me appraise her some more. "You like?" She giggled happily.

All I could do was bug my eyes out some more and nod. What kind of fucking question was _that_? Surely she had seen herself.

Rose, who I had forgotten about completely, huffed loudly besides me. "Will you two just get the fuck together already?" She put her hands on her hips, irritated. "_Edward_," she jabbed a finger at my chest. "You and your lack of balls to ask her out _or_ make the first move." She then directed her annoyed glare to Bella, gesturing up and down her body with her hand. "And _you_, dollface," she continued, "Your whole little dress-to-impress shit is getting on my fucking nerves."

Oh, Rose. You shouldn't have, really. You and your ability to say whatever is on your mind.

Bella giggled and I could tell she was blushing. "Love you too, Rosie."

She narrowed her eyes at the both of us. "I'm serious." And then stalked off to God knows where.

She chuckled once again. "Glad you guys could all make it," She told me over the noise. "It really does mean a lot to me." Unintentionally, she was bobbing her head to the loud music. It made me smile.

"No problem, Bee," I grinned, glad I came after all. Funny how things worked.

Out of no where, Jessica appeared at Bella's side. Before talking to Bella, she quickly flashed a large smile and winked at me. I rolled my eyes. I did have to wonder – How did Bella put up with the bitch all these years? Beats me.

"Bella!" She yelled over the music, "This is fucking amazing, love! You have out done yourself." Bella smiled and muttered a thank you. "Now come and talk to some people! Everyone's looking for you!"

Before Bella could reply, she was being dragged away by Jessica. "Dance with me later?" She asked with a hopeful smile. I smirked at her; crossing my arms, leaning against the wall and nodding. She then disappeared through the crowds of people.

The truth was, Rosalie was right. Sort of. It wasn't that I didn't have the balls; It was that I was still not sure if having Bella that close to me was safe. If the Volturi ever found about us being together that way. . .I mean, it was already bad enough that they even knew about her already.

_Goddamn, Edward, this is a fucking party. Lighten up_.

I listened to the irritated voice in my head, agreeing with it for once.

I decided to go and find Emmett, or Rose, or even Bella again. My goal was to maintain a low profile and _not_ face any of the eye-batting plastic girls who were most likely roaming the premises. Easier said than done. Trust me.

"Hi, Edward," the Mallory twins both said in sync as I walked by. Lauren and Lucy. _The blonds_. I didn't want to be an ass, so I stopped and gave them each quick kisses on their cheeks and continued on. Better loved than hated.

"Hey there, handsome," some girl I didn't even recognize stopped me with both hands on my chest. "Why haven't I seen you around before?" She moved so that our chests were touching. "I'm Sue." She purred into my ear.

Her skin was the color of an orange, her eyelashes were practically longer than her fingers, and her hair was so blond it looked white. I had better places to be.

Screw the not being an ass shit. "And I care?" I gently pushed passed her, leaving her standing there, gaping like a fish. You will go far, Sue. You will go far. I shook my head at the people on Bella's guest list. Surely half of these crazy bitches had invited themselves.

I spotted Emmett – A beer in his hand and a loose arm around Rose's shoulder. If those two didn't get together soon, I'd bitch them both out Rosalie style. I half considered getting her back right then and there.

I didn't, because I finally found where all of the dancing was going on. Bella wasn't hard to find – she was front and center, all eyes on her. She was laughing and smiling as everyone temporarily stood still, waiting for the next song to began.

A song by Usher started, blaring into the speakers. Everyone immediately began moving again. My eyes stayed focused on only Bella. Once she started dancing, my breath caught.

Her hands were both over her head and tangled in her as she swayed her head. Her whole body seemed to be moving perfectly in tune with the music. She grinded her ass around – her hips constantly twirling in different directions. She was vertical fucking sex. The amount of skin and concentration she was putting into her moves was also an incredible turn-on.

She was making me fucking _insane_.

I noticed every single guy around, girlfriend or not, eye-fucking her with eyes the size of plates. Rather than glaring daggers at them like I wanted to, I slowly made my way over to where she was.

Her eyes were closed as she kept up her sensual movements, refusing to let anyone break her stride.

I stood closely behind her, placing my hands on her hips. She didn't even have to look to know it was me. She reached a hand up, cupping my cheek and silently urging me to dance with her. How could I refuse?

Dancing wasn't hard – it was instinct. I just followed whatever the hell everyone else was doing. If you could even call it dancing, that is. She began playfully grinding up and down my body, keeping up her twirls and spins. I moved with her, wrapping my arms fully around her waist and locking my hands together against her stomach. She let out one of her cute loud trilling laughs, and everything just seemed so natural.

It was so easy to be with her like this.

Not a single care in the world. . .

Knowing that it wouldn't last forever, I made the most of the freedom I could get. I rested my chin on her shoulder, "Very sexy," I approved in a low whisper into her ear.

"You're not so bad yourself," I heard her respond breathlessly as she kept up her dancing.

Never had I imagined the day would come where I would end up dirty dancing with the most beautiful girl in the world. It wasn't my normal behavior at all, but maybe that was a good thing. This made me feel more normal than anything else ever had. I rode on all the high feelings that knowledge was giving me.

As the song came to an end, I spun her around to face me. Her smile was simply dazzling, and her eyes were lit up with excitement as she looked at me.

Then, in that moment, something just _clicked_. For the both of us.

Staring into her wide brown eyes, I realized that in that instant, there was nothing more that I wanted in the world than _her_. The force of my need nearly knocked me over, making me breathless. I knew her thoughts were in sync with mine – Her mouth opened slightly as her eyes widened even more.

One second we were both staring at each other in complete shock and stunned realization. The next second, we were crashing into each other; the distance apart becoming unbearable.

Her arms quickly hooked themselves around my neck as mine wrapped tightly around her torso – pulling her even closer against my chest. We were both still panting from the previous song, and the next one had already started. Neither of us noticed.

Our lips finally met, causing me to moan into her mouth. This was why I had never kissed Bella before; I knew that if I did once, once would never be enough. And I was right.

Her lips were everything I imagined them to be and more. They tasted sweet, and were even softer than they looked. Greedily, we began sucking hungrily at each other's mouths, breathing heavily.

She fisted her fingers through my hair, and I moved my lips from hers to catch my breath. Her's didn't stop though; she began a trail, running her heavenly lips down my jawline and to my ear. Her nose nuzzled my cheek before she hovered her lips over my ear lobe.

"I need you," she whispered, pleading.

_Fuck_. Her words shot straight down to my already throbbing erection.

I needed her too.

For once, I didn't let myself think of the different options I had, and what the consequences those options would turn out to be. Because really, I could only see one.

And once my mind was set on something, there was no turning back.

With my hands, I guided her legs to wrap around my waist. She immediately obeyed, hoisting herself up and into my arms with her grip still tightly weaved in my hair. Holding on to her, I began making my way through the ridiculously large crowds of people. She buried her head into the crook of my neck and planted repeated soft kisses there.

Both too wrapped up in our little world, we were completely oblivious to the observers watching us as we went by.

It's not like I gave a fuck either way.

_She was mine_.

I had made up my mind that I would no longer try and fight off this shit. I needed Bella, and oddly enough, she needed me. It was as simple as that, and if it weren't meant to be, things would have stopped a long time ago.

Clearly, that was_ not _the case.

I hurried up her stairs, completely at ease. I swore to God, this girl didn't even way a hundred pounds. That was an extremely good thing, considering how fucking long her stairs went on for. Grand staircases were completely overrated.

As I reached the top floor, I stood in the hallway. "Which room?" My voice came out huskier than I would have liked.

"Left," she breathed into my skin.

I kicked the door open with my foot, closing and locking it once we were inside. Her bed wasn't hard to find. The thing was a fucking beast. I had never seen a bed so big. As a matter of fact, I don't think I had ever seen a _bedroom_ so big. . .

I carried her over and fell with her into her soft pillows and comforter. I landed on top of her, but supported my weight with one hand as I wrapped the other into her hair. As soon as we were both on the bed, the kissing started up again.

I thought there had been the smallest chance that I would be able to restrain myself from this, but I was completely wrong. I was so fucking gone, I couldn't have stopped even if I wanted to.

Because the moment our lips touched once again, my will power was truly crumpled into dust, along with all of my careful restraint, and any ability I had to fight off her hold on me. It was gone. All of that shit was completely gone.

So I let myself do whatever the hell I wanted, because I was a greedy fucking bastard, and was positive that I needed this. I needed her. Now.

I hadn't been able to accept that before, but I definitely could now.

She seemed to be having similar thoughts. Her soft, warm tongue darted out to meet mine. Our kissing quickly turned from sweet and tender to fucking desperation. She pushed her hips up, grinding them into mine as soon as she felt my raging hard on.

Her tiny hands began clawing at my shirt at her silent demand for it to be removed. I let out a low chuckle in her mouth before pulling away and quickly yanking it off my head. I threw it on the floor and met her hungry lips once again.

There were only a couple of small, colorful lamps lighting up her vast room. The different shades of lighting did wonders to the tone of her eyes, making them breathtaking. More so than usual, I meant. They were sparkling with anticipation as well.

Her shoes were starting to piss me off. As great as they looked on her, they needed to be removed. Immediately.

I pulled away from her face and laughed at the expression she made as I did. Her lip was in a pout – her luxurious brown hair spilling out around her face. Roughly, I tore the shiny white boots from her feet. Seconds later, they were being tossed to the ground as I moved back up her body.

Her hands frantically roamed my chest, running up and down every inch of available skin, causing shivers to run down my spine and to my toes. I roughly placed my lips over hers once again and tangled my fists into her shiny hair. Every lost emotion I had ever had was coming out, and I was becoming completely undone by what her presence was doing to me.

Her small but capable hands found their way to the zipper of my jeans, quickly undoing them and motioning for me to help her take them off. I lifted my hips so that she could slide them down my legs. I kicked them off as soon as they got to around my ankles.

I pulled away from her face for a moment and frowned. The lack of clothing I was wearing was hardly fair. All I had gotten to take off so far were her damn boots. I glared at her white dress for a moment. I wanted it off. Badly.

My hands quickly moved from her hair to the zipper down the side of her dress. I unzipped it in an amount of time I thought to be impossible and tore it from her body.

I moaned out loud at the sight of her bare chest. Still supporting my weight over the top of her, I allowed one hand to eagerly grope one tit at a time. Her breathing was coming out in panting breaths as she writhed and arched her body towards my wanting hand.

With my thumb, I swept down her fully erect nipples. She writhed and let out a loud moan which went straight to my already aching dick. I felt like I was going to explode soon with the need to be _inside_ her.

I removed my hand, only to lower my face down for more access. Do say I licked the shit out of them would be an understatement. I fucking devoured those suckers. Till the point of which Bella's pleading moans were becoming too much for me.

I moved my face back to hers as the erotic kissing began once again. It was like a game – to see who would give in to the need first. I really wouldn't have minded loosing _this _game against her.

She arched her hips up, grinding them into my rock-solid dick. I hissed, clenching my teeth together. I was seconds away from giving in to what both of us wanted.

Just like Bella could read my mind, she moved her soft hands down to my only remaining article of clothing. My boxers. Without any hesitation, she slid the elastic waste band down, completely discarding it from my body. I bit down on her neck as my erection was now exposed to the slightly cool air.

Before I knew what she was doing, she wrapped her warm fingers around my length. I clenched my teeth together as a violent shudder coursed through me. "Bellllllllla." Her name rolled off my tongue in a strangled moan.

I thought she would stop there, but I was wrong. Instead she began working her hands up and down like a pro. It was both incredible and disturbing. I couldn't help but wonder how she got so good with balls. . .

Fuck that shit, I could care less at the moment – I was getting probably the best fucking hand-job I would ever get in my life.

She eventually began this pattern: Fast up, thumb over head, slow and hard down. It felt so fucking good, I could already feel my climax began to build up. She continued working wonders with her small, magic hands. As her movements began increasing, my lower muscles began to tremble as I approached my orgasm.

I almost over the edge. I was anticipating the most amazing, toe-curling sensation. . .

Then, she stopped.

Just fucking stopped.

I held back my growl of frustration as I opened my eyes to see her hands pull away. If I thought my dick had been painful before, now it was just in pure torture. You don't just leave someone on the edge like that. Ever. It's just cruel.

I narrowed my eyes at the devious smirk spread across her face. Before I could demand what the deal was, she held a finger delicately over my mouth.

"I've got a better idea." She explained in a tone entirely too sexy for her own good.

I immediately understood what she was getting at.

I moved myself down her body so that I had easy access to removing the thin, lacy fabric. I probably should have been more sweet and caring and shit, but that ship had sailed _long_ ago. I think we were way passed tender and loving. It was pure, animalistic need.

In my haste, I was fairly positive that I ended up shredding them from her body. I don't think she minded. She moaned my name as I cupped my hand over her heat. Her arousal was practically dripping onto my hand; the warmth radiating from her center. It caused me to groan loudly in satisfaction of what I was doing to her.

I moved back up her body, placing my arms on either side of her head as I hovered over her. I was about to thrust myself inside of her, when I froze.

"Shit!" I growled, frustrated. She gave me a confused, irritated look. "Don't. . .have a fucking. . .condom. . ." I managed to mumble as her hands found their way around my dick once again. God that shit was distracting. And amazing.

All she did was smile back at me. "Birth control," she explained simply.

I dropped my forehead to her shoulder, breathing into her skin. "_Thank God_."

I positioned my tip, holding it right before her opening. And just because the suspense was killing us both, and there was absolutely no more restraint in me to wait, with one, hard thrust I pushed myself deeply inside of her.

I was immediately engulfed in heat. She was wet, tight, and fucking _incredible_. I felt every inch of her, and instantly needed to feel more. Needed to be deeper. Because this shit was _so_ much better without a condom.

Of course, even though the only other time I'd been with a girl had been while using a condom, I was fairly positive that Bella felt the best compared to anyone in the world. I wasn't about to sit here and compare her to other girls though. She was so much better than them. Besides, I had drawn a very tight veil over that one, wretched night.

I pulled back so that I was almost completely out again. This time, I anticipated what was coming. Clenching my jaw into a hard line, I pushed in once again, even further than before.

She let out a loud gasp – her fingers digging painfully into my scalp. "_Fuck_!" She groaned loudly, writhing and arching herself beneath me.

I began a steady pattern; pulling out, then thrusting back in even harder than before. The noises she was making – the moans, the pleas – were causing my orgasm to build up once again. After a few minutes straight of being inside of her, I became closer and closer by the second.

She was really close too, I could tell. After I entered deeply in her once again, her legs came up, wrapping themselves around my waist tightly, causing me to go even further in. Her breathing was coming out shallow and labored as she urged me on, planting frantic kisses on my neck and chest.

I kept going – faster this time, deeper than both of us thought possible. Suddenly, a violent shudder ripped through me as my powerful climax finally took over my body. I clenched my eyes shut, fisting the covers tightly in my hands as every muscle inside of me tightened. "Oh _fuck_, Bella!" I groaned loudly into the soft skin of her shoulder at the pleasure I never thought possible.

After what seemed like years, I finally came down from my ultimate high. Just in time to watch Bella's own orgasm overtake her body. Her walls clenched around me, causing me to hiss at the sudden tightness. Her arms were around my neck, pulling me down to her as she bit my shoulder, muffling her loud cries.

Hers lasted longer than mine. When it was over, she released her tight grip on me and fell back into the soft pillows.

She was a goddess. A glorious, sexy, amazing goddess.

With a thin layer of moisture covering every inch of her body, her chest rose and fell with the deep, exhausted breaths she took. Her eyes were closed, and her lips were practically quivering. Her hair was a tangled, wonderful mess; no doubt sex hair of perfection.

Sighing, while also breathless, I removed myself from her completely. Rolling to my side, I also collapsed into the pillows next to her. We were both silent; the only noises were our loud breathing and the muted bass from the music below.

Words did not express how incredible that really was.

_That_ is what I had been missing all along? Well, shit. I shouldn't have denied my wants for so long. Rosalie's words rang through my head and I realized how right she had been. How right _everyone_ had been. Bella and I should be together. It was as simple as that. The fact that we also _sexually_ compatible was even more proof. We fit together like fucking puzzle pieces.

"That was. . ." She trailed off, her voice in awe.

"Simplement incroyable." I said, equally dazed.

"God, your sexy when you speak French," she sighed in a whisper, turning her head to smile at me. "Now what does that mean? Just so I know your not telling me the sex was bad or something like that." She grimaced playfully.

"Simply incredible," I told her, staring into her eyes. They were a glowing, creamy shade of amber, and it was like I could see miles and miles into her soul. Cheesy shit, I know, but true none-the-less.

Just then, there was a loud pounding on the door. Bella's eyes grew wide as the door knob rattled, but I remained at ease. I had locked it when we first came. "Bella! Edward! Open up!" Alice's voice yelled from the other side. It sounded almost frantic.

"Fuck off, shorty!" I called lazily, rolling my eyes.

"Go to hell, dickhead," she responded back with an eye roll in her voice. Ignoring any further comments from me, she continued on. "Bella, you might wanna come downstairs quickly. Some douchebag was hitting on Rose and she didn't like it, and Emmett stepped in, and now things are getting kinda tense. . ." she trailed off.

"Shit!" Bella muttered, leaping off of the bed. "I'll be down in a sec!" She called back to Alice. "Try and calm them down or something, okay?"

I also got up, quickly sliding my jeans back on. Bella looked around the room for something to put on herself. Her dress would take too long and I knew she'd be opposed to the idea of taking the time to look through her wardrobe and finding something else.

I tossed her my black t-shirt. I could manage without a shirt for a little while because we were apparently pressed for time. Bella, on the other hand, could not. I didn't not want _anyone's_ eyes on her pretty little bare body. It just wouldn't work.

She couldn't argue because she was in a rush to get downstairs. She quickly threw it on over her head and straightened it out. It was about four sizes too big, but it would do for now. She looked down at herself and frowned.

I rolled my eyes. "You look better in it than me, now throw these on too." I tossed her my plaid boxers. If she was going to wear my shirt, might as well wear those too. The idea of her in my clothes was surprisingly. . .hot.

Besides, I rather liked the idea of everyone seeing her in my clothing. It was kind of like branding her. It wouldn't even look weird that she was wearing them. People hooked up at parties all the time. This wasn't anything different.

Except it was. It was way different, confusing as hell, and overly complicated. Long story short, I guess I just wanted all of those guys down there to know that she was _mine_.

At least, in theory she was. We hadn't exactly discussed where our relationship had just gone yet. . .

She pulled me from my thoughts, tugging on my hand. "Come on, let's go!" She urged, pulling me out the door. I followed closely behind her down the stairs. I noticed the music had been turned off, and I could hear Emmett's booming voice from another room.

Everyone seemed to be gathered around in a circle, watching. It was in the same general area where Bella and I had been dancing. Pulling me with her, she proceeded to shove through the many watching onlookers who stared at the both of us as we passed.

We finally managed to break into the opening where Emmett was standing, along with Rose, some other guy, and Alice and Jazz off to the side. Rose was fuming with the look of death directed towards the supposed dickhead Emmett was now confronting.

"You know what? Go and fuck yourself, you arrogant son-of-a-bitch!" Emmett's loud angry voice filled the room. "Stay the hell away from her. She said _no_." His voice was slurred from the drinking he had been doing, but the anger made it a lot more comprehensive to the rest of us.

The guy, who I now recognized to be Quill from my science class, took a step forward, ready to fight. "I have a better idea! Why don't you go and fuck your _mom_!" He sneered back, glaring.

Oh shit. He went there. Telling that to Em of all people? Not good. I almost felt sorry for the bastard. That is, until Bella decided to step in.

Before Emmett could work up the anger to beat the hell out of him, Bella quickly moved herself in between the two. She held her arms out, restraining each of them from breaking into some sort of massive brawl.

"_Quill_," she said in an angry tone. "Either apologize, or get the fuck out of my house in the next ten seconds." I smirked. There she was – my brave little baby sea. The scene before me was comical, really. Bella was almost two heads shorter than both these guys, standing there in her baggy guy clothes. I chuckled to myself, shaking my head.

"Why the hell is he here in the first place, Bella?" Em spat, taking a step closer; his chest running into Bella's out-stretched arm. I looked across the room, meeting eyes with Jazz. He gave me a slight nod. We were both on standby in case she needed any help.

"Yeah, _Bella_," Rose's voice was full of acid. "He's a great guy, really. Can't imagine why anyone _wouldn't_ want him here." She loathed with heavy sarcasm, crossing her arms and continuing to glare.

"Enough!" Bella huffed in irritation. "Now, Quill," she narrowed her eyes at him. "Like I said, you can either apologize and mean it or leave immediately."

At this point, Quill was practically seething in anger. He was glaring daggers at both Emmett and Bella. Suddenly, he lunged for Emmett. Bella moved her whole body towards him, pushing against his chest in a desperate attempt to stop him.

He shoved her away, swinging his fists and narrowly missing her face as she pushed against him again. He shoved her onto the ground this time. She fell with a loud thump. I expected her to be on the verge of tears or something, but that was definitely not the case. Her expression was downright pissed. If she had it her way, she would have gotten a knife and cut off this dude's balls in that very second.

As amusing as that idea may have been, I quickly interceded.

I darted towards him, bringing both my hands around his neck and proceeding to shove him up against the wall, slamming his whole body into it and holding him there. Before he could swing at me, Jazz and Em were each easily holding back his arms.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Okay, _first_," I began in an angrily annoyed tone. "Don't ever, ever, ever fucking swing at a girl, you prick. _Second_," I continued on, "Calm the fuck down. Go to the goddamn monster truck rally for that shit. I'm sure they're in town soon."

My comment received a few quiet snickers from the crowd as Quill's face became a mixture of fury and embarrassment. Yeah, that's what you get for pushing my girl, dumbass.

"Now," I told him in a relatively calm voice. "Are you going to apologize to Rosalie _and_ Bella, or not?"

He grimaced, shaking his head. "Fuck no!" I heard him mutter. I gripped onto his throat even tighter, not pleased at all.

"Oh, Bella?" I called happily. "Can you come here please?" A wicked smile spread across her face as she practically skipped over to my side.

"Yes, Edward?" She said in a sugar-sweet tone.

"I'll let you take it from here," I smirked, releasing my grip and stepping aside. His struggles were no match for both Em and Jazz's hold on him. I watched, crossing my arms, ready to be thoroughly amused.

And just like I knew she would, she did _not_ disappoint. Quill looked relieved that it was Bella confronting him and not me. If only he knew. "You're gonna regret not listening to him," she said in a soft, menacing voice while using her sweetest smile. "If you think having me take care of you instead of him is a _good_ thing, then you are most definitely mistaken."

She pulled back her knee and in one, gracefully swift move, kicked him in the crotch with a surprisingly great deal of force. "So kiss that, beyotch." She exclaimed with a sour smile, turning around and grinning at me. "All done."

A few guys whistled in the audience. Some girls clapped and gave her praising comments. Needless to say, everyone including Rosalie was pretty pleased with how things had resulted.

Em and Jazz released him from their grip, knowing that he'd be leaving pretty shortly. He had to try and scrape up the small amount of dignity he had left, because after you get kicked in the nuts by a girl, you're pretty much royally fucked when it comes to the social status.

Just like everyone knew he would, he hurried out of the house, trying to be subtle about his departure. Yeah right. It was about the most inconspicuous thing I'd ever seen in my life, bud. Clutching on to his manly parts in pain, he hobbled out the door and started the engine of his rather loud truck. Bella kept that pleased smirk on her face until you could no longer hear his car in the distance.

I looked around to see everyone else slowly began making their way to the door as well. I guess I hadn't realized how late it was. It was just passed one in the morning.

The six of us remained lounging around the area until there was only a few people left. Jazz had a knowing look on his face as his eyes darted back and forth from Bella to me. Rosalie was wearing the smuggest smirk I'd ever seen as she crossed her arms and stared at me. Emmett was standing next to me, drinking a glass of water, surprisingly.

I shot a glance at Bella who was wrapping up a conversation with Alice – I couldn't imagine what they were discussing. She glanced at me out of the corner of her eye without actually looking in my direction. I watched as her lips twitched, fighting back a smile.

It only occurred to me now that I had no idea how to proceed with this. I had no idea what to do next. So we had sex. Where did that leave us now? It's not like this was the first time I realized how head over heels I was for her. I was just accepting it now, unlike I had been before.

"Yo, Runaways," Emmett called in a loud, casual tone, waving his hand towards the door. "Let's bounce!"

Alice hugged Bella and walked out the door with Jasper. Rose actually managed to muster a friendly smile and 'thank you' as she walked by. Emmett hung back, waiting for me. He had this weird look on his face though. It was a knowing smirk, and it kind of annoyed the hell out of me.

Bella bit her lip, looking down at the floor as she made her way over to me. She stood in front of me, staring up at me through her eye lashes with a thoughtful expression. "So." I stated simply, wondering what else I was suppose to say. She waited for me to say something else. "I guess I should say goodni–"

"Will you stay with me?" She suddenly interrupted; her tone hopeful. She quickly looked down at her feet again – her hands messing with the tips of her hair. She looked up at me again with almost a sad expression. "I really don't want to be alone." She whispered.

There was nothing sexual about that statement at all. I knew exactly what she meant, because I felt the same way over and over again. She wanted the feeling that someone was there for her. She couldn't manage to be alone, because she was scared of the rejection to be accepted.

I wanted nothing more than to grant her that simple request. And even though there were still a million questions not answered between us, and a lot that needed to be said, that could all be easily ignored for at least tonight.

Because all I wanted was to hold her. All I wanted was to make her feel safe, and give her the security while acting as her protective halo.

Answering her question, I turned around to Emmett. "You guys go ahead," I told him. "I'm going to stay with Bella tonight." The look on his face told me he already knew that.

He waved to Bella. "Way to kick some ass tonight, Bells." He grinned before shutting the door behind him as he left. I rolled my eyes and turned back to her.

"Thanks," she whispered quietly.

I gently folded her into an embrace; slowly wrapping my arms around her small body. She returned it, laying her head against my chest. I rested my chin on her forehead as we stood there for a long moment, neither one of us saying a thing.

Sighing, she pulled away. "I have to set the codes," she yawned walking over to the panel by the door. I stood beside her as she punched in various numbers and clicked on different buttons. Once she was done with that, she walked over to the front door and locked it.

I was relieved at how good she was at taking care of herself while at the same time I felt a surge of pity for her. I had the feeling that there were a lot of nights like these. Ones where she was all alone by herself. Well, besides Laurent of course, but he didn't really count. He had probably gone to bed hours ago.

I silently followed her back upstairs to her room. I shut the door behind me and waited for further instruction. "Here," she slid off my boxers and tossed them to me. "Jeans are as uncomfortable as hell. I have pajama bottoms I can wear." She disappeared into her large closet, only to appear a minute later with pink and white striped fleece pants.

She walked sleepily over to her bed. "I'm keeping the shirt," she explained in a yawn. "I rather like you a lot without one on." she told me drowsily.

I smiled, shaking my head at her. She pulled back the soft covers to her massive king-sized bed, climbing onto it and snuggling herself under the layer of blankets. She stared at me, raising an eyebrow. "Are you going to stand there all night?"

Without another word, I walked over to join her. When I got to the bed, she patted the spot next to her with an inviting smile. Her warm eyes allowed me to crawl in without a second of any sort of hesitation.

I rolled over onto my side, facing her. We stared at each other for a moment before she slowly inched herself closer to me. The space between us disappeared as pressed herself completely against my body, nuzzling her soft nose into my chest.

I constricted my arms tightly around her, securing her in a comfortable embrace. Instinctively, I buried my face into her soft, curly hair. I heard her sigh contently into my chest as the room fell completely silent.

There was something about being with her this way that made me allow myself to forget the outside world. When I had her in my arms like this, it was so easy to forget all of my fears; my worries, my stress. The fact that I knew I was making her feel safe just added to my current list of reasons why I loved sleeping with this girl.

"Goodnight, Edward," she whispered quietly as her soft breath tickled my chest.

I tightened my grasp on her, ducking my head down to press my lips gently against her forehead. I held them there for a long moment before finally pulling back, burying my face in her hair once again.

"Goodnight, Bella."

* * *

**CHAPTER SONG: **Bring Me To Life - Evanescence

_Kinda cliche, I know, but it really does fit. For both of them._

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: "**Simplement Incroyable" - _simply incredible_

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**A/N: **I know some of you were expecting the Volturi to show up or some fiasco like that. Really? Would I be that mean for their first time? They're coming eventually though, trust me. Seriously; savor the fluff now because who knows how long it'll last. And for all the important questions that I have not yet answered - those are also coming. Eventually. Just relax, because you will find out, dears.

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**Reviews are better than wearing Edward's clothes.  
Mkay. That's such a fucking lie. But I'd still like one anyways? (:**


	12. Seul

**If you didn't know by now, I have a twitter.  
Follow me? My name is '_simplydazzling'**

**I've also become one of those lame people who post the pictures of things from certain chapters on their profile.  
I know, I know. But still - if you're curious, then look. I put Bella's house, her dress, and her room so far. Guarantee more will come soon, alright?**

**You guys are my superstars.  
Thanks for being so supportive of my writing.  
I really could not ask for better readers, and I'm serious.**

**So enjoy the fluff in this chapter; saivor it while it lasts.  
Because, you know. This is a DARK story.  
And I'd bet my next non-existing paycheck that DARK things are on the way.**

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**BPOV - Seul**

I was comfortable. More so than usual. In fact, a lot more than usual. I sighed contently, nuzzling myself further into the warmth and comfort. Then, I heard a soft, musical chuckle.

Realization of the previous night's events suddenly crashed over me. I snapped my head up with wide eyes. Bad idea. Fast movements in the morning were never good. My vision went blurry and my head spun until it was resting comfortably on Edward's nice chest once again. Head rush.

I allowed my head a few moments to stop spinning while I stayed in the exact same position. His quiet laughter caused his chest to rise and fall, bringing me along with it. I couldn't find it in me to roll off though. I was far too comfortable than I probably should have been.

Everything from last night seemed to be just a foggy and clouded memory. Of course, that probably had a lot to do with the fact that I was just waking up. What time was it anyways? Without moving, I peaked my eyes open, darting them to the clock. It was just passed eleven. Huh.

I tried as hard as I could to get last night back in my memory. I remember loud music. A lot of dancing. Dancing with _Edward_. Then there had been kissing. Then there had been. . ._Oh_.

I had sex with Edward.

Good sex.

Fucking _amazing _sex.

Then he had stayed over night with me. And now I was cuddling up to his bare chest, waking up to a far too pretty face than entirely possible. A lot had happened in so little time. I had so many questions running through my mind, but they all seemed to be directed at one particular question: _What did we do now?_

I had a feeling that Edward had been awake for a while now. Probably thinking a lot, just like I was doing now. When I finally decided to look at him, I slowly rose my head, blinking the sleep out of my eyes as I peeked up at him through my eyelashes.

My chin was resting on his chest and I couldn't help but smile at his expression. Something about his face was drastically different than what I normally was used to seeing. I liked it. Quite a lot. So I couldn't help but smile myself as his sparkling green eyes gazed into mine.

"What happened last night?" I asked blankly, hoping he'd have a better explanation than I did.

He didn't respond right away, just like I knew he wouldn't. He was just as at a loss of words as I was for the whole thing.

Finally, he closed his eyes and sighed, brining his hands up to run through his messy hair. "I don't know what the hell happened, but all I do know is this." He opened his eyes to meet mine once again with a soft, serious expression crossing his face. "I'm tired of trying to keep myself from falling for you."

Those words had more impact on me than I would have thought possible. I kind of just stared at him with this dumbstruck expression on my face as I slowly let his words sink in. I wasn't shocked by what he said – I obviously knew there had been mutual attraction from the start.

I was just shocked with myself that I had gone so long ignoring it.

I didn't need to respond to his statement, because I knew he could read it in my eyes. Instead, I proceeded in a quiet whisper, "What do we do?" I asked, not trusting myself to come up with the answers this time.

He thought about this for a while. I watched as his eyes stared up at the ceiling while the room was completely silent. Keeping his gaze on the ceiling, he finally spoke. "I can't promise you the world," he began in a sad tone. "I can't give you nice things, and I sure as hell know that I'm nowhere near being good enough for you–"

I narrowed my eyes slightly. This was his solution? Typical Edward. Thoroughly convincing himself he didn't deserve the things he did. I wasn't having it. "Don't you know me well enough by now to know I could care less about that shit?"

Instead of answering my question, he snapped his head up to meet my gaze, sitting himself up slightly with an elbow propped up for support. "Have you ever been scared to do something, that if you did, you were afraid it would change how you felt about life completely?" He asked suddenly.

I nodded, knowing exactly what he meant. I slowly moved up his body, straddling his lap while I brought my hands up, running them over his neck and weaving them through his hair. "Edward," I whispered, staring into his piercing green eyes. "That's life. You've gotta give it all you got, because you never know if there's gonna be a next time." And with our lives being the way they were, that statement couldn't have been more true.

I didn't want to over-think this like I did everything else. I wanted it to just _happen_. I wanted it to be easy and flawless – something I wouldn't have to question on a daily basis. I wanted to be with him, and it was as simple as that.

Very slowly, I moved my face closer to his. I hovered my lips just inches above his. "I'm not scared of you."

He brought his hand up, placing it on my cheek. "Well you scare me."

Then, he closed the distance between our mouths. As light as a feather, he placed his lips on mine. No tongue, no groans. This kiss was drastically different than anything from last night. It was tender, sweet, and soft.

I gently sucked on his bottom lip as he sucked on my top. His thumb was doing light circles on my cheek as I brushed back the few pieces of hair falling onto his face. It was like that for about a minute straight. Just soft, tender kisses.

I eventually pulled away, because I didn't want it to last forever and become this whole production. I moved back a couple of inches and slowly fluttered my eyes open to meet his. They were shining again, and he had that crooked grin that I loved, plastered across his face.

"This is about to go against all of my better judgment," he whispered with a grim expression, "but I don't have a choice anymore. How about we just let whatever happens happen, alright?"

With all the shit going on right now, that did seem to be the best solution. I nodded with a small smile. "Okay, but just remember – whatever _does_ happen, I'm with you."

With a defeated expression, he nodded solemnly, not arguing for once. "Hey," I said softly, placing my hands on his cheeks once again. "Cheer up a little, nothing is going to happen."

His face became a devastating mask of sadness. "I wish I could believe you." he whispered. "You have no idea how much it kills me that I can't."

It was always like this with Edward. He was happy as a clam one minute, and the next he was beating himself up and letting every bad emotion that he had consume him. His mood was a rollercoaster.

His words tugged at my insides as I realized the real reason behind why we had been resisting each other for so long. It was because of his past. Because of events in his life that he had no control over. It was from the loss of his mother, his childhood being stolen from him, and the people who were out to kill him.

It wasn't those reasons that made him so broken though. He was doing this to _himself_. He blamed himself for everything that had happened – all of the horrendous things he couldn't have stopped no matter what.

It broke my fucking heart.

Into a million shattered pieces.

I couldn't stand to watch him suffer this way – I couldn't stand to watch as he beat himself up about all of this stuff daily. This had been one of the rare happy moments between us, and I wasn't about to let him convince himself he didn't deserve it.

I plunged my face into the crook of his neck, tightly wrapping my arms around him as I squeezed myself to him. He was stiff and unmoving as I tried desperately to rid all of his sorrow from him.

"This isn't your fault. _Don't_ blame yourself," I pleaded into his warm skin. He remained still and silent, and I couldn't handle it anymore.

I ran a hand up his chest, cupping it around his neck. "Hold me," I whispered. "Like you did last night. When it was just me and you, and nothing else. No memories, no dark thoughts, no anything." I said softly, gently stroking his cheek with my fingers. "Please," I begged in a quiet voice. "Just forget about all of that for a minute. Think about me and you and _just hold me_."

My quiet pleading worked. He slowly came back to life, gently bringing his arms to wrap around my body, pulling me even closer to him. I pressed my nose into his neck, resting my cheek on his shoulder as he buried his face into my hair.

For an immeasurable moment, we stayed in our tight embrace.

I squeezed myself impossibly closer to him before finally pulling away. He looked so much better than he had just minutes ago. There was no crease in his forehead, no pain in his eyes.

Sometimes, all he really needed was this. The knowledge that there _were _people who cared about him. Relieved that he was happy at least for now, I smiled warmly him.

He smiled back, silently thanking me with his eyes. I crawled off of him, as much as I didn't want to, and got off the bed. Even though my hair was a wild mess – from last night's activities and having slept a good ten hours – I decided to shower later rather than now, and made my way over to my walk-in closet.

I decided on an old Hollister hoodie and a pair of small boy-shorts, figuring I wasn't leaving the house today anyways, so might as well be comfortable. I glanced over my shoulder to Edward who was still laying lazily in the bed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

I quickly changed out of his shirt and my pajama pants. I threw my hair up into a messy pony tale and walked back out of my closet. "Here," I tossed him his shirt back. "I wanna keep it, but you need something to wear in case Renee and Charlie get home early." He nodded, slipping it on over his head with a half smirk.

After he had changed back into his pair of jeans, we were ready to head downstairs. I darted my eyes around the empty house, smiling to myself at the fact that Laurent had already taken care of all the cleaning. I loved that man. Edward seemed to know what I was thinking because I saw him roll his eyes.

We each poured ourselves a bowl of cereal and sat down at the counter. "I should probably leave in a little bit," he stated before devouring a spoonful of Fruit Loops.

I rose an eyebrow with a confused look on my face. "Why can't we just stay here today? I mean, it's as safe of place as any, right? Besides, they aren't hunting today, are they?"

He sighed with a frustrated expression on his face, directed only towards himself. "God, I'm an ass. I haven't been fair to you at all, Bella. There's so much I _haven't_ told you."

He was true, but I had accepted that a long time ago. I knew there were things he wasn't able to tell me; the memories inflicting too much pain on him, making his life even more unbearable. Of course, in cheerier terms, he just didn't want to have to remember that bad shit.

"It's okay," I mumbled looking down at my bowl. "You don't have to tell me everything."

His face was thoughtful for a few moments before it suddenly changed into determination. "I've never explained to you the Volturi's definition of 'hunting', have I?" He asked. I shook my head, curious as to where he was going with this.

"Well I'll tell you then," he said, shoving another spoonful in his mouth. After he finished chewing and swallowing, he went on. "When they call me and say they're hunting, it usually just means that they're looking. Sometimes more hard than others. So basically, if I'm at the wrong place at the wrong time, it's over. Most of the time they don't hold the patience to keep up their little chases. Other times, they really like to get into their games. Like that one time I picked you and Alice up?" I nodded, understanding to a point of what he was saying.

"They want me dead, but at the same time, they don't want to waste all of their time trying to get that particular goal accomplished. They've learned by now that it's not the easiest thing in the world – tracking me down. Besides, it's not like they sit at their headquarters all day, plotting on how to destroy my life. They have other things to do. I think they run some sort of illegal drug and weapon system or some shit like that."

The more he talked, the more I understood, and the more I realized about his life. He sighed, wrapping up his long speech into a short conclusion. "I overreact a lot, okay? I'm overprotective, and I take all the precautions I can." He looked up at me, meeting my gaze. "I do it because even though I know there's a small chance of actually getting caught, I don't want to make one stupid mistake, causing that small chance to turn into a big one."

"So what you're saying is that it's not really as bad as you're always saying it is?" He was shaking his head before I could even finish that question.

"No, not even close," he quickly responded, pausing for a moment before pursing his lips. "Okay so you know the story of Anne Frank, right?" I nodded. "Well it's like that. A lot. Well, like that, only in a completely different scenario. My point is, even though if we keep hiding like we are now and we probably won't get caught, there's still that small chance that we might. And if we get caught, we're dead. Literally."

I thought about that for a moment, allowing myself to shudder a little at the thought of dying. "Okay," I finally said, "I get it now." And I did.

More than I ever thought I would.

The whole morning and far into the afternoon we spent our day lounging around the house. Not exactly doing things as a couple, but not exactly staying away from each other anymore either.

I guess that was to be expected after last night and all. We had certainly jumped the physical hurdle. I wasn't sure about him, but _I _considered it a good thing. Like when we decided to pop in a movie. I didn't hesitate for a second when I cuddled up on the large sofa right next to him, resting my head on his shoulder.

Though he never told me, I knew stuff like that secretly made him feel more normal. So I did everything I could think of. I held his hand when I thought it was appropriate. I playfully kissed his cheek whenever I decided the moment was right. Just simple stuff like that.

And it was working, because I had never seen him so happy before. _Why hadn't I thought of all of this earlier?_

I was just doing exactly what Edward had told me to do. Let whatever happen, happen. He didn't seem to mind. At all. In fact, he was doing the same thing. He'd compliment me on something, brush a piece of hair from my face – just a bunch of affectionate stuff.

Normally I was one of those people who frowned upon that gooey, mushy crap. I hardly could help myself though, being that this _was_ Edward we were talking about. I figured it wasn't possible to resist any sort of kind gestures from that boy at all. I didn't even want to try.

Closer to dinner time, Charlie and Renee walked in. Well, not exactly. Charlie dropped Renee off before he had to go to his office and do some work he missed while he was gone. Edward and I had been doing homework together when she entered the room.

I quickly got up to hug her. "Mom," I sang, throwing my arms around her. "How was the trip?"

She smiled widely, showing all of her teeth. "Wonderful, as always. You know how much I love Miami." I grinned back at her, trying to match her enthusiasm. "How was your weekend, dear?" She had yet to acknowledge the fact that Edward was sitting at our coffee table right behind me.

"Good, good," I told her honestly. Though 'good' was the understatement of the century. "The party went well," Once again, I didn't think 'well' was even close to covering it. "And today's been fine." If only she could see how much I was lying through my teeth at my serious lack of better adjectives.

I knew if Edward had it his way, his words of explanation would be along the lines of 'fucking fantastic' or 'amazingly incredible' or 'wonderfully perfect'. Then again, he always _did_ have a way with adjectives.

"That's great, dear!" She exclaimed, finally turning her gaze to Edward's amused face. He was always so entertained by my erratic mother. "_Edward_!" She said excitedly. I was surprised she even remembered his name.

"Mrs. Swan," he grinned back, letting out a quiet chuckle.

"Please," she waved a hand dismissively, "Call me Renee. So nice to see _you_ here," she rose an eyebrow, quickly flashing her face to mine just so that she could wiggle her eyebrows while sending me a very pointed look. I rolled my eyes, because I really didn't know what else to do.

"So have you been keeping my darling daughter company than?" She asked, propping herself down into a nearby chair.

"Yes, ma'am," he smiled politely.

"Well that's _wonderful_," she stated in a frivolous tone. A few moments of silence passed as she suddenly stood up. "You know what? Why don't you stay for dinner, hun? I'll go up and unpack while Laurent fixes us a meal."

He couldn't say no to her. Not because he didn't want to, or because he didn't have a choice. It was because he was absolutely intimidated by her. The look on his face told me he was trying to decide if she was borderline crazy, or just on drugs. As she promptly left the room, I crossed my arms and shook my head with a quiet laugh. "Alice is her real daughter, I swear."

An hour later Edward was pulling out my seat for me as the three of us sat down at our massive dinner table. Laurent had cooked Chicken Alfredo, which just so happened to be my favorite. Edward seemed pretty excited about it as well. I suppose he would be, considering he never really got any good food ever.

The meal started out silent, which was a surprise because Renee always seemed to have something to say. Instead we all piled food on our plates and spent the first portion just savoring the noodly-goodness Laurent had made us.

Eventually, my mom spoke up. "So Edward," she began, dabbing her face with her napkin while smiling happily at him. "What's something great you've done lately?"

He was too focused on his food to really think about his answer. "Your daughter," he responded absentmindedly. Once he realized what he had said, his green eyes grew ten sizes wider than they already were and he choked on his food.

Before I could react, my mother was laughing. Just fucking laughing. And smiling a lot too. It was the craziest thing. Maybe Edward was right – Maybe she _was_ on drugs. I stared at her in complete shock as I watched her tear-up with laughter.

What the fuck?

After he successfully swallowed his food, the same expression as mine crossed his face as well.

"Mom?" I quirked an eyebrow, staring at her with a concerned expression on my face.

She finally managed to calm down. She placed a hand on my back, "Oh, honey," she chuckled breathlessly. "Why didn't you ever tell me how funny this boy was?" No, mom, the correct question should have been why didn't you ever tell me a thing about this boy at _all_?

With a nervous smile, I nodded and went with it. At least she didn't think he was serious.

He seemed to notice as well and relief washed over his face. When he glanced up at me through his lashes he smirked while I rolled my eyes. _Men_. The rest of dinner finished off with minimal to no conversation. At least, him and I tried to avoid it with Renee as much as possible.

Everything was going fine. That is, until she had to ask him his one forbidden question.

"So, Edward," she said casually, "What do your parents do for a living? I'd love to meet them sometime." Her eyes sparkled with anticipation as she said this, and I groaned internally.

Because right as she said this, Edward went completely rigid in his chair next to me, and his whole face turned white as a sheet. Pain filled his eyes, and his jaw clenched into a hard line. A casual observer would never notice these things.

I, however, was not a casual observer.

I watched his painful attempts of mustering an answer out of himself. "My dad's a doctor," he said in a shaky voice. "And my mom's a teacher. I'm sure they'd love to meet you sometime too." Dropping his eyes to his plate, he glued them there and never removed them for the remainder of the meal.

My mother, of course, did not seem to notice, so after she eventually finished her meal, she got up and left the table, leaving the two of us alone in a 'subtle' manner. Subtle my ass. If she thought her raising of eyebrows and winking was subtle, she really was on crack.

As soon as she was gone I immediately reached for his hand. I held it tightly in my lap with both of my own hands, just stroking it and rubbing it softly while we sat there in silence. I had learned with Edward a long time ago that sometimes, you didn't always have to say something in this sort of situation. Sometimes, just having the other there was enough.

I prayed to God that I was right.

After a long moment of silence, it appeared I was. When he finally moved his eyes from his plate and to mine, they were normal again. I apologized with my eyes, hoping he'd forget about the whole thing.

It's how our relationship worked. And I pretty much loved it. We didn't have to talk – we some how were connected enough to read into each other's every movement and silent gaze with just a glance. The fact that I had never shared that quality with anyone was even more proof that him and I should progress on with our newly found relationship. Well, whatever we were calling it, that is.

I cupped his cheek as I stared at him. "Are you gonna be okay?" I whispered.

He slowly shut his eyes and leaned his face even further into my palm. I stroked my thumb in soft circles as I studied his face. It looked oddly vulnerable – something I only saw from him in moments like these.

As he opened his bright green eyes, he looked so lost. Like a small child. Like any one word could break him. Without talking, he gently brought his hand up, placing it over mine before removing it from his cheek and intertwining our fingers. I watched him as he brought our tangled hands up to his mouth, placing a soft kiss on my hand before dropping them in between the two of us.

"I should go," he finally said after a long moment.

I bit my lip, looking down and nodding. "I'll come over right away tomorrow morning," I promised before I looked up to see him with a doubtful smirk. "Okay," I rolled my eyes, "Whenever I wake up. But I assure you, I _will_ be there before noon."

He grinned, shaking his head, and I was relieved that he was better again. "I'm gonna hold you to that, Bee. The day you wake up before noon will be the day Emmett stops dropping innuendos every other minute. It's not going to happen."

I playfully narrowed my eyes at him. "We'll see."

We kept our hands locked together as I walked with him towards the door. He had called Emmett about ten minutes ago to come and pick him up. Sure enough, when we looked out the window his old jeep was parked in the spacious driveway.

He sighed, shaking his head as a loud honk sounded from a likely annoyed Emmett.

He finally released my hand, only to pull me gently against him in a tight hug. I smiled against his chest, embracing him back as we stood in the doorway. With a content sigh, he pulled away, leaning down to press a soft kiss to my forehead.

And with that, he left.

I mumbled a "be careful," but it had been too late. Instead I watched him out the window as he ran to Emmett's truck, drawing his hood up and getting in. With a pang of sadness, I watched as they drove away, wishing I could have gone with them.

As much as I wish I could have, I knew I couldn't. I had already been spending too many nights at "Jessica's" as it was, and I felt bad for abandoning my parents all of the time. Of course, it's not like they thought twice about leaving me home alone all the time.

Either way, I knew one night at my own home wouldn't kill me. That is, if I was lucky, at least. I remembered Edward's earlier words though, and felt somewhat better about this whole thing.

I went to bed shortly after he left. There was really no point in staying up later. Besides, the more sleep I got the better if I wanted to make good on my promise to Edward to arrive at his place by noon. Renee had gone to bed already from her long flight, and I wasn't sure when Charlie would arrive home. So like I said – there was really no use in staying up.

I decided to finally get around to taking that shower I had been planning on. After I was fully refreshed, I slid on my pajamas, brushed my teeth, and walked about into my room.

I frowned at the sight before me. My bed had never been made which only led to having my mind wander back to this morning. And last night. And just. . .him.

I quickly straightened my covers before pulling them back and crawling into them. In a way, he was perfect. Not in the standard meaning of the word, but a much deeper one. He was perfect in a way that gave me hope. That caused me to allow myself to believe that there really _was_ good in this world of so much hate.

Because Edward had lost everything.

And even though he may have been broken, he kept going.

He was what we all should strive to be. He was normal in many ways – he held grudges against the people who had done him wrong, he didn't always have the answers, and he made mistakes. It was beyond his incredibly selfless persona though.

It was that even though he did have absolutely nothing, he kept going. He didn't sit there bitching about things he didn't have like everyone else on the planet. He held everything he did have with all that was in him.

The fact that he wasn't perfect and accepted his flaws was what _made_ him perfect.

I couldn't help but smile as I yawned and shut up my eyes. I curled to my side as always, nuzzling my face into the sheets. A pang of loneliness filled me as I laid alone in the large bed. Never had my bed felt so big before. I rolled over into the spot where Edward had been last night, burying my face in the pillows and inhaling what was left of his soothing scent.

I recalled back to a time where Edward had been explaining his life. He had used one word over and over again: it had been _seul_. He had said it meant lonely. It was just another emotion to add on to the list of common feelings we shared. Life was ironic.

It was then that I realized something – You never really appreciated something until it was gone. A saying I had heard hundreds of times over and over in movies, books, and life. One that had never really held much meaning for me; one that I never really brought myself to understand.

I did now.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Proud of You - 10 Years

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Seul _- "lonely"

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**Reviews keep me from being lonely.**


	13. Laisser Aller

**I was planning on posting yesterday, but you know, FF hates me and wouldn't let that happen.  
So here - Something good to finish off your weekend, m'dears.**

**Twitter: _simplydazzling  
Just so ya know. (;**

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**Edward - Laisser Aller**

"Alice is about to fucking explode, I swear to God," Em exclaimed as I got in his truck.

I chuckled, shaking my head. "What's the reason this time?" I glanced over to see him shoot me an irritated eye roll, proceeding to give me the most skeptical look I had ever seen. I guess I asked for that one.

"Take one guess, Bud," he told me in a condescending tone that sort of pissed me off. "Nice, by the way. Classic party bedroom act." I narrowed my eyes at him. He rose his eyebrows in innocence. "Hey, dude, we all knew it would happen eventually. There was only so long before you finally gave in. Speaking of which," he muttered quietly to himself. "Jazz owes me a hundred bucks."

I crossed my arms, slumming into my sweet with an annoyed expression crossing my face. "I don't see how it's any of you guys' fucking business," I mumbled in irritation, glaring out the window. Couldn't I live my own damn life?

"Whoa, Ed," he quickly responded, "Calm down, man. We're family. It's cool."

I sighed, realizing that he was right and that I was overreacting to something stupid. "Sorry," I apologized quietly. With a small grin, he allowed me the rest of the short ride in silence, because he knew once I was inside, I would never hear the end of it. Pun most definitely intended.

I should have known they'd all be sitting around in the main room waiting for my arrival. Because just like Emmett had warned me, the minute I walked in I could feel their curious stares on me.

I slid off my shoes, walked over and slumped into my futon, placing my hands behind my head and shutting my eyes. It was silent for a good moment, only until it became unbearable for Alice. "_Edward_," she finally said in a loud voice. I peeked one eye open at her anxious face, smirking to myself.

"Yes, Al?" I asked smugly, knowing that I could very well go the whole night without telling her a thing, driving her up a wall to insanity. She was just like that.

"God, your annoying," I heard Rosalie mutter in irritation as she sensed what I was thinking.

Em plopped down next to Jazz, playfully punching him in the shoulder. "Hundred bucks, man. Cough if over. Now. Smiley boy over there finally did the deed." He winked at me, shooting me a thumbs up. I grumbled, rubbing my face with my hands then running them through my hair.

Alice's eyes grew wide. "You mean you guys actually _did_ it. Like _it_ it?" I rolled my eyes at her, shaking my head in disbelief at how hypocritical she was being. She was no virgin – It's not like her and Jazz were the abstinence type.

"Yes, Alice," I confirmed in an annoyed voice, "Bella and I had sex." Which was basically implied by the way we had been in a locked bedroom together. "What exactly are _you_ going to do about it?" She looked a little taken back by my hostility, but I really could care less. She needed to understand that prying was not a good thing.

My statement hung in the air as thoughtful expressions crossed all of their faces. "So. . .are you guys like. . .together now. . .?" Jazz asked cautiously, knowing my reactions to this question weren't always pleasant.

I sighed. "I don't know," I admitted honestly – an answer no one would be too thrilled about. Especially Alice.

She threw her hands in the air in exasperation. "What do you mean you _don't know_?" She cried in a frustrated growl. "It's a yes or no question, _Edward_." She gritted through her teeth.

"No, Alice," I narrowed my eyes defensively. "It's not a yes or no question. It's complicated. You wouldn't_ get _it. Contrary to your beliefs," I huffed, "Not everyone lives in your perfect little world. Now fuck off, okay?"

She didn't look surprised by what I had said at all. In fact, if I'd have known any better, it actually seemed like she had been expecting a response along the lines of the one I had given her all along.

"Why are you such a dickhead?" Rosalie prodded without actually glancing in my direction. "God only knows how that girl puts up with you all the time. Really wish I knew. Maybe she could teach me a thing or two about how to deal with your asshole mood swings."

I sent her a cold smile. "Love you too, Rosalie."

And this was why we rarely had 'family' discussions. For one, no one took them seriously. And two? None of us had the patience to keep up that kind and caring facade needed to carry on the concern for the topic. In other words, we couldn't all go five minutes without fighting. A significant sign that we were truly a family.

"Well, Ed," Emmett grinned at me from across the room. "Since I'm the only one who has yet to speak, that does make me entitled to say something, doesn't it?"

I groaned before he could finish that sentence. "I'm getting tired. I think it's time for bed."

"Bed?" Emmett rose an eyebrow. "I mean, Ed, I'm not even sure you know how to kiss. . .and you're trying to get me into _bed_?" He threw his hands up in the air in fake disbelief, shaking his head while sighing to himself. "What happened to the good ol' days where you could just be friends first?"

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You, Emmett McCarty, are the reason people do drugs."

He smirked at me. "I try, bro. I try."

"That's a first," Jasper bursted out in chuckles. Prick.

Rosalie let out an irritated sigh. "Fuck you all, I'm goin' to bed." She narrowed her eyes, turning to Em. "And _no_, Emmett. I do _not_ want you in bed with me." She huffed, stalking out of the room as Alice blew her kisses while rolling her eyes.

"I get first bedroom!" I quickly called before she was completely out of the room. She turned around to glare at me, but I just smiled back smugly at her. "So suck on _that_." I had the nerve to stick my tongue out at her. The good mood I was apparently in allowed me to do so with confidence.

"I hate you." She muttered, storming into the second bedroom while proceeding to slam the door shut in a loud fury.

I sighed to myself, shaking my head. "She will do great things."

"Tell me about it," Em muttered in exhaustion.

And because I was serious about the whole sleeping thing, I mumbled my "goodnight" to the three of them and headed off to bed. After I changed into a clean pair of old sweatpants, I crawled under my covers.

Not only was this bed ten times less comfortable than the one I had slept in the previous night – It was also empty. Empty of the one thing I wanted most in that moment. And with that, I drifted into a cold, lonely sleep.

"I'm here! I made it!" Bella shouted breathlessly as she sprinted through the door. She glanced at the clock flashing 11:59 and then back to me. She shot me a dazzling smile. "_Told_ you I could do it."

I chuckled, shaking my head. "I'm genuinely surprised right now. Seriously? This has got to be some sort of milestone."

She slipped off her shoes and jacket at the doorway. With a warm smile, she surprised me by walking over, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek and then plopping down closely next to me. I had to admit, I rather liked what progress we were making with this whole 'couple' thing.

"Hi," she grinned; her eyes sparkling.

I guess the quiet little squeal that escaped Alice's mouth was rightfully deserved. That was the first display of affection she had ever seen from the two of us. Not that there had been a whole lot of them in the first place, but still. This was a big deal to her. Why? I had absolutely no idea.

Her excitement quickly faded at Bella's failure to acknowledge the fact that she was also in the room. "Hello, Bella," she said in a politely irritated tone. I shot Bella a smirk, only because she was about to be in for it. Alice's bitch-outs may not have been anywhere near the magnitude of Bella's, but they were still scary as well.

"Alice!" Bella gasped, "You know I love you, darling!" Then, she shot out of her seat next to me, running over to give Alice a hug. I was slightly jealous. I got no such hug. I stopped that thought the minute I realized where it was going. Never did I expect the day to come where I'd end up bitching about gushy gestures. Shit.

I watched as Alice whispered something low into Bella's ear and they both giggled. Girl talk. Now there was something I would most certainly never able myself to be jealous of. I had discovered long ago that guys had much less complicated conversations with each other than girls did.

She pranced back over, sitting right where she had been before, possibly even a little closer. Not close enough, actually. If I could have it my way, she'd be on my lap. But then again, I wasn't too sure _her_ way would be too thrilled about it.

It was a slow, homework kind of day. For a while, it was just Al, Bells, and I. After a while, Jazz entered into the picture, bringing a batch of cookies his mom had made for us. Jazz and I devoured almost all of those poor cookies as the girls sat there, taking dainty little bites out of the same one.

Rosalie was visiting her father, and I was pretty sure Em was with her. I could hardly ever keep track of the whereabouts of those two anymore. Whatever they had going on between them was way too confusing to classify.

Of course, it'd be hypocritical to say that Bella and I's relationship was any different.

Everything was going normal, until Jazz's breathing changed. Alice was the first who noticed it, because her head quickly snapped up and her wide eyes darted to mine. "Edward," she stated loudly in a shaky voice. I moved my glance towards Jazz who was sitting next to her. I quickly picked up on his mood change as well.

"Bella," I said loudly, breaking her from her study trance. She looked up at me with a worried expression from the tone I had used. I quickly moved my eyes to Jazz and back to her, gesturing what was going on.

A knowing look crossed her face as she quickly shut her book and got up, hurrying to Alice across the room. "Ally, let's go. It'll be okay," she said calmly. "He'll be fine, Edward has him." Alice's eyes were sparkling with moisture as she looked at Jazz with a devastating expression before Bella ushered her out of the room.

I heard my bedroom door slam closed and focused on the situation in front of me. "This is fucking bullshit," Jazz exclaimed angrily as his eyes became animalistic. "Why am I even fucking here? You don't _want_ me here. You've never _wanted_ me!"

I stared at him in bewilderment as his mind wandered off to the ghosts of his haunted childhood. Wherever he thought he was in that moment, definitely wasn't a pretty place. "Jasper." I said in a stern tone. "Come _back_."

He suddenly snapped his head towards mine with a menacing, un-like him glare twisting onto his face. "Why should I listen to _you_? You're not fucking in charge of me! _No one_ is." He huffed, standing up.

"Jazz." I said again, keeping my voice steady as I also stood up, slowly approaching his shaking form. His whole body shook with the rage none of us really understood. "You're Jasper Hale. Alice Brandon loves you with her heart and soul and you love her. Emmett and I are like your brothers. You're eighteen. You're _Jasper_."

He suddenly kicked over the small table and slammed his fist against the wall. Hard. It had to hurt like hell. I was beginning to get panicky. Normally he was better by now. Normally I didn't have to play the whole background check thing.

From this point on, the only thing that would snap him out of this insane torture was the one person in the world who had all power over him. "Bella," I called loudly, stepping back a couple of feet to stay out of his way. I heard footsteps before she was suddenly peeking her head around the corner of the hallway.

"Yeah?" She asked, darting her eyes from Jazz to me. Her face fell when she realized he hadn't gotten better yet. "Shit," I heard her mumble. "Alice is having a breakdown right now. This isn't good."

Because she also knew what it would take to get Jazz out of this. She sighed with a pained expression, "Alright, I'll go and get her."

Moments later the two of them emerged from the hall. Bella had a comforting arm around Alice's shoulder, and Alice's face was slightly tear-stained, red, and a little puffy. It was a tragic sight to behold.

Jasper, still seething in anger, stopped what he was doing to stare at the two of them. Bella cleared her throat, leading Alice a step forward. "Jasper Hale, this is Alice Brandon, your girlfriend." She spoke in a confident tone, "She misses you and wants you to come back."

His glare became a little less hostile, but was still there. "Who the hell are you?" He asked, "Why are you here?"

Alice sniffed a little, stepping forward and out of Bella's grasp. She walked up to him until there were only a few feet of distance between them. It was a little risky, but I truly believed that she could get him back in a matter of seconds.

"I love you, Jazzy," she whispered, forcing a smile on her face as she spoke to him. "Please, baby, come back to me." She pleaded as her voice cracked.

He silently stared at her a few moments before his glare finally disappeared and his whole face softened. Wordlessly he closed the distance between them completely, pulling her tightly into his arms and squeezing her in a loving embrace. He kissed her forehead, her nose, her cheeks, her lips, whispering how much he loved her over and over again.

It seemed like such a private moment, and I felt like intruding by watching, so I quickly moved my gaze else where. Bella's eyes met mine and she shot me a wary smile.

And because I could read her like a book, I knew her exact thoughts as she looked at me with her piercing stare. _Could that ever be us some day? _I didn't give her an answer because I didn't have one. Instead, all I could do was stare back at her, sending her a genuine look that told her: _I hope so_.

"I'm rather looking forward to school today," she yawned as I got into the car and shut the door. I rose an eyebrow, because this was definitely new. I could never remember a day where Bella had _not_ been less-than-thrilled to go to school.

She laughed a sleepy laugh; another indication that sleep wasn't something she was getting very much of lately. I had thought of a few ways to solve that problem, but was too nervous to ask her if she wanted to try any. "It's going to be fun," she told me. "Quill and his friends are gonna be pissed about the party, Jessica and her friends are going to be all over you like always, and after my arguably raunchy dancing on Friday night, I believe I'm going to have a couple of admirers."

I rolled my eyes. "You _always_ have a couple of admirers."

"Does that bother you?" She suddenly asked, sending me a curious sideways glance with a small smirk filtering at her lips. "That I have a lot of guy fans I mean?"

I hesitated on how to answer that. I suppose if this whole relationship thing was going to work out, the honesty standard would definitely need to be raised. I sighed, "Does it bug you when girls always stare at me?" I countered, answering her question with a question.

She hesitated for a moment before biting her lip and nodding. "There you go then," I answered matter-of-factly. "Now, back to my original question – Why should today be so fun?"

She shrugged. "I dunno. I just feel like I'm going to have a lot of haters after what I'm going to do to you today." I gave her a skeptical look, raising an eyebrow. A smirk appeared at her lips. "PDA can be a fun, fun thing, Edward." She told me in a sly voice.

I wanted to protest on what she was saying, but how the hell could I when she was looking at me that way? "Bella. . ." I began. The only reason I wanted to say no was because I was afraid that _I'd_ acquire a few haters as well. The girls I could handle – The guys were who I was worried about. Bella was like some sort of prized possession to almost all of them here; I had the feeling they didn't take to her new boyfriends very well. If I even was that. Either way, I wasn't too sure it was the best idea.

"Oh come _on_," She complained. "You won't have to deal with Jess and her friends anymore. Besides," her face became soft. "You deserve to be happy. You were robbed of your previous high school experience, so I now feel obligated to make this one a million times better." She reached over, taking my hand in hers and holding it tightly. "You don't have to do this to yourself. You've got to stop beating yourself up all of the time and just _live_."

I think I finally understood why Bella was the way she was. Why she did what she did. "You really like to live in the moment, don't you?" I asked as I looked at our intertwined hands.

She kept her eyes on the road ahead as we neared the school building. "Most people waste all of their time worrying about what's gonna happen to them in the next life that they forget to live this one." She shrugged casually.

Her statement; that one, simple statement was what realized how wrong I had been about everything. She was right, of course, but it was more than that. It wasn't just that her words were right, it was that they were a-hundred-percent-incredibly-perfect-representation-of-the-world true. They made me realize so many things. Some of which scared the shit out of me.

I didn't mind the fact that dying was a possibility before. It always seemed like something that would happen, because I knew my running couldn't last forever. But now that I realized how little I had actually lived, I was scared to die. I didn't want to die.

So the minute we pulled into the parking lot and got out of the car, I crushed her to me. I kissed her with as much intensity I was capable of, and refused to let her pull away until I was absolutely positive that she understood what I was doing. Because I was showing her she was right, and the smile on her face against my lips told me she knew it as well.

I pulled away just in time to see the shocked, jealous faces of the plastics. Their faces were priceless of course, causing an incredibly large smirk to spread across my face. That was two things in a row Bella was right about.

PDA _was_ a wonderful thing.

**Bella**

The next week went by perfectly. Well, as perfect as it could get with our situation at least. The Volturi remained quiet and left us alone, which was a pleasant surprise. My evenings consisted of an alternation between spending dinner with my two families. My parents, and the runaways.

Everyday I could feel myself getting closer to all of them. Alice was becoming a sister. Em and Jazz were my two crazy, annoying brothers. Rosalie was now my new favorite person to bitch about things with. Good times.

And then there was Edward. A week. It had been exactly one week since we hooked up at my party. Not once had I even thought about regretting a single moment that the two of us had shared that night. Just like I promised myself I would, I left it alone. I let it happen. I just _went_ with it.

While I was busy with my new pact not to over-analyze every damn thing in the world, Edward was slowly relaxing more and more everyday. Not relaxing from the Volturi – definitely not; his attitude remained the same towards them as it always did. He was relaxing in ways that indicated he was okay with how life was going. He was accepting the idea of letting me in more and more.

I could see the changes – in his eyes, his behavior. I could tell; everyday he'd seem just a little bit more comfortable than the day before. Comfortable as in he laughed more, he smiled more, he interacted more. All of those things were such small differences that no one would be able to pick up on unless you payed as much attention to him as I did.

I was fairly positive that wasn't possible.

It's not like we didn't have our bad days though. Mine had been Thursday. Some bitch had thought it would be okay to talk about me behind my back while we were in the same room. And in close proximity as well.

In her conversation, I had picked up on three particular things that had really bothered me. The rest I kind of just laughed at, because let's face it – the plotting the destruction of one's life thing is kind of amusing.

At the time, I hadn't been able to get passed some of the things she said though. The first thing that royally pissed me off was when she began saying that I was a classless attention slut. Because one, I wasn't classless. At all. In fact, I went out of my fucking way to _be_ classy. Two, I didn't ask for the damn attention – people just had nothing better in their lives to do other than stalk innocent girls. And three? I wasn't a slut. I just wasn't.

The second thing she had said made me sad. She had whispered something about me being a brainless bitch. The only reason that bothered me at all was because you can't call someone you don't know a bitch. Unless you truly know what they're going through, that's not okay. Especially when they worked their ass off to maintain a good grade point average.

The third thing hit home, causing me to be in actual pain. She had said something about me using Edward to make myself look better, and how it was 'typical Bella' to go for the only guy anyone actually wanted, _just_ to piss other girls off.

On retrospect, that was just typical girl-on-girl drama. This was different though. I'm not sure why I reacted the way I did, but something inside of me just snapped. For her to accuse me of using Edward? It hit a nerve. The thought made my chest ache. If only she knew either one of us. Than maybe she'd understand.

But with sad intuition, I realized that it was likely for no one to ever understand.

So after all of that was said and done, I ended up crying in Edward's arms. I never explained my sudden tears and he never asked. With us, most of the time things were just implied. He knew that the only thing able to make me better was him, so he gladly offered his arms for a good hour.

Friday was his bad day.

We were in biology and it was a work day. Some dickhead sophmore more in our class – lord knows how he managed to get into AP science – was antagonizing Edward for whatever reasons he thought necessary.

It would have been comical really had the kid not gone out of his way to make Edward feel like shit, resulting in Edward and I skipping lunch the next period. We sat between the two brick buildings, away from the wind.

He was sitting with his knees up in a fetal position, crossing his arms over the top of them and resting his head on them with his back against the brick wall. He wasn't crying, but I could tell that he was letting this kid's words eat at him. I couldn't watch it.

I grimaced at the dirty ground, realizing that if I sat down my designer jeans would be ruined. _What the hell was I talking about? _I quickly scolded myself for the inexcusably lame, shallow girl moment. Edward was five billion times more important. And I had fifty other pairs at home. I would live.

So I hesitantly sat down on the ground next to him, close enough so that our sides were pressed against each other. I rested my head on his shoulder and we both sat their in silence as the moments passed. I wanted to speak, but I didn't know what to say.

"Edward," I whispered, pleading, "Stop. Please. You're killing me right now to watch. He was just an incredibly immature, sorry-excuse of a kid. Don't let him even think about getting to you." Truth be told, I wanted to cut off the kid's fucking balls. I decided not to mention that to him; There was no need to fuel the fire.

The same thing applied to him as it had in my situation – You couldn't insult someone when you didn't have a clue what they were going through. Especially when that someone was Edward. It wasn't all the kid's fault, though a hell of a lot of it was.

No one was aware that they had full power over Edward. Anyone did. Because even though he put up his walls, he was just as weak as the rest of us. Possibly even more. What made me so mad that I wanted to spit was the fact that people had the influence to do whatever they wanted to Edward. Not just that, it was also that they used it to their advantage without even knowing.

There were always holes in Edward's walls. Ones that revealed his vulnerabilities. Ones that if you looked hard enough, saying just the right thing to him, he would break. And there was nothing I could do about it.

Granted, I was being a tad bit melodramatic for this particular time, but that was besides the point. This time it was something little – something that would most likely only upset him for a day at the most. But there was always next time to take into consideration.

Because next time it could be something big – something he decided to let rule his life and eat at him constantly. I couldn't let that happen. Ever. Because when Edward suffered, I did too. I would never understand how that was possible; it was something only explainable if you were actually feeling it first hand.

But that's how it was. That's how _we _were.

"Hey." I whispered. "Look at me."

As slow as ever, he rose his head from his knees to meet my anxious gaze. I studied the exhaustion in his eyes for a few long moments. Because that's really all it was. Pure exhaustion. He had bottled up too many emotions in the last week and they were finally catching up to him.

Determined to make him smile, I silently debated with myself on what to say. Finally, I sighed to myself. Of course. "Remember the first time we met?" I whispered, watching the slight bit of recognition flicker across his face. He barely nodded. "What was the first thing you thought of me?" I asked softly.

The slightest smirk crossed his lips. "I remember you being really nosy." He told me, "You were always wondering what I was doing." He paused for a moment, pursing his lips.

"And?" I encouraged him to go on.

"I remember you were always smiling too, no matter who you were talking to. Even Rosalie." He let out a low chuckle, and I knew whatever I was doing was working. "You laughed a lot too." He was staring absentmindedly somewhere in the distance. "I like your laugh. Have I ever told you that? It makes me smile." I don't know why he sounded so sad when he said this.

He snapped his eyes back to mine suddenly. "I remember trying to ignore you. You made it _so_ hard for me all of the time." I gave him a small smile at the memory. "I think I always knew it wouldn't work. I knew from the moment I saw you I wouldn't be able to keep myself away from you forever."

A long pause passed between us before that smile I had been waiting so long for finally spread across his face. "You told me I had pretty eyes. Did you know that no one's ever told me that before?"

I brought a hand up, placing my palm on his cheek and stroking my thumb right below his eye. "They _are_ pretty," I grinned as I watched the sadness slowly vanish from his face.

I had to admit, I was pretty smug about all of this. Not that I would actually tell him though. The ability I had to make him feel better still amazed me, even though it was becoming a routine in our crazy lives. On top of the smugness, I felt proud of myself. Proud that I actually had some sort of purpose for once.

I'd do it every day if I had to.

Before I knew what I was doing, I hitched a leg over his torso, straddling him completely as I sat on his lap. I leaned in, resting my forehead on his as I smiled at his surprised expression. We hadn't exactly had a real kiss since the morning after the party, and it was driving me crazy. Sure, we had shared a couple of chaste ones, but nothing too meaningful.

It was like he was thinking the same thing. I wasn't quite sure why we each restrained ourselves all the time – we clearly both wanted this a lot. I mean, it's not like you could _always_ deny being a sex-driven teenager. Not that we were. At least, not yet.

One thing we _were_ though was impatient. Edward placed his hands on my hips, firmly pressing his lips to mine as I weaved my fingers through his disheveled hair. His lips molded perfectly into mine as we allowed a few moments of greedy, breathless kissing. Our tongues began an epic battle as our faces remained securely connected.

I darted my tongue out to trace his soft lips as he sucked roughly on mine. I noticed there was something guarded about the way he kissed me. It was like he was putting everything into it because he had no way of knowing whether we'd have another chance. It was both sexy and disturbing, though I tried to force myself not to read into it too much. _Just enjoy what you can get, Bella_.

So I did exactly that. I moved my lips at a more desperate pace as my hands slid down to hold either side of his face. I leaned myself into him more, not being able to help myself but grind down on his hips.

I mean, there was only so much restraint I could have when I felt him eagerly below me. He hummed quietly into my mouth as our kiss depended, gripping my waist tighter while encouraging my motions at the same time.

I sighed breathlessly into his open mouth, smiling against his lips. I changed my hand position yet again, slowly moving them down and over his chest. I began gently rubbing up and down his hard muscles as I kept my mouth on his.

"Shit, Bee," he broke away from the kiss, leaning his head back against the wall and closing his eyes. "You start the whole hand thing and I'm gonna be done for." I smirked; He didn't exactly say it as in it would be a _bad_ thing.

He was probably right anyways though. The bell would be ringing shortly and with it being the day before Spring Break, I couldn't afford to miss any tests or big lectures before the break. I smiled, leaning down to plant a trail of soft kisses on his open neck. "Okay, I'm done."

The last two hours of school stretched on and on, making the anxiety for the atmosphere practically unbearable. Our absence from lunch had gone unnoticed, due to everyone's focus on plans for the week long break.

Neither Charlie or Renee had spoken of plans for the family, so I assumed we were going to wing it like we did every year and just pick a last minute spot like always.

Not only had Edward been considerably happier after the whole make-out session, he was also looking forward to the long break away from dreaded school work as well. Of course, he could have dropped out whenever he wanted to, but he insisted on staying with me.

Without a glance back at our peers, we got into the Volvo and were the first ones out of that forsaken place. The ride to Edward's was quiet. It was okay though, because it was a comfortable silence.

I parked a block further away than normal because it was an unusually warm day for March. We got out of the car and since there had been no phone calls that day, Edward reached for my hand and held it as we walked.

I looked up at him and watched the sunlight dance off his messy, copper hair. I leaned into his side as we walked, letting out a teasing laugh as I watched the radiation of contentment dance in his eyes. "You know," I began, "The sun's good for you every now and then." He chuckled, shaking his head at me. "I'm serious!" I protested playfully, "You're starting to look like a vampire!"

His laugh was suddenly cut off by a large hand covering his mouth. Before I could even react, a set of arms was tightly secured around me, making it impossible to escape. I clung onto his hand with as much force as I was capable of as I watched his eyes widen in panic.

I screamed loudly, struggling to escape the rough arms that were now holding me back. My cries of help were quickly cut off as a hand flew over my mouth as well. I managed to turn my head towards Edward, only to see him desperately thrashing against the two large men who were also restraining him.

"Let her go!" He managed a muffle yell through the hand grasped over his mouth. "Laisser aller!"

I didn't know what was exactly going on, but I had a pretty good idea as to who was behind it. Suddenly, my hand was being torn away from the Edward's. Torn away from the only thing in that moment that eased my fear. As soon as our locked hands became separated, nothing was stopping the violent waves of panic shuddering through my body.

I heard a bleak voice come from somewhere behind me as I continued to struggle out of the iron hands of restraint. "We got them." I heard someone say in an eager voice. "We finally got him."

Those words; those four, simple words were what made me realize with sinking intuition that all of our running had finally caught up with us.

I attempted one last useless try at escape before something suddenly hit me hard on the head. Blackness began fogging my eyesight and mind as I struggled to remain conscious. "Edward!" I cried through the hand.

When it came to the point where I could no longer stand straight, I faded into a dreadful darkness, without the slightest bit of hope that things were going to be okay when I woke up again.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Hero - Skillet

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION:** _Laisser aller _- "let go"

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**Reviews help me decide how long I'm going to keep you guys waiting with this wonderful cliffie.  
The more reviews, the nicer I'll be. :D**


	14. Votre Temps Est Fini

**You know what? Screw an author's note and just read the damn chapter already.**

**(:**

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**Edward - Votre Temps Est Fini**

My eyes flew open as soon as my consciousness came back. I had no idea how long I had been out, or where I was as my eyes flashed around the large, spacious room. Most of the room was dark, except for a faded yellow tint it had to it. I tried to move, but was held back by a cold metal.

As soon as I realized that my arms and legs were bound tightly by chains to the wall, an overwhelming amount of panic swept over me. I immediately began scanning the room for Bella. She was no where in sight. It took me a minute to realized I was not alone.

"Ah, Edward has finally woken up, guys," The cold, familiar voice stated – the voice that belonged to no one other than my tracker himself.

He stood in front of me, creating no more than a ten foot space between us. Out of no where, his brothers stepped out from the dark shadows behind him, and stood at his side. All three were dressed sharply in black, and had victoriously smug smiles on their faces.

I wasted no time in getting my answers. "Where is she?" I gritted through my teeth.

"Why, Edward," Aro laughed menacingly, the ugly sounds filling the room. "I don't know who you are talking about." He flashed his teeth at me, taunting me.

I knew that nothing would work to my favor unless I went along with their sick games. "Bella." I said in a sharp, demanding voice, narrowing my eyes. "What did you do with her?"

"Oh," He stretched the short word for a second too long. "_Her_. Your pretty little girlfriend? I have to give it to you, cousin, you have some mighty fine taste." He smirked again. "In fact, I might just have to snatch her."

I just glared at him until he gave me my answer.

He sighed, "She'll be here shortly – she's still waking up."

Like on cue, a door opened up and in walked two men, each restraining one of Bella's arms. Her head was glue to her feet as she walked, slow and defeated. I couldn't help myself. "Bella!" I said in a loud voice, getting her attention.

Her head immediately snapped up, and her eyes instantly found mine. Her face became relieved, only until she saw what was restraining me. Instead of looking determined, or even frightened, she looked extremely sad. Defeated. Like she had already given up on any sort of hope.

_Don't be like me, Bells,_ I wanted to yell to her. _Everything will be fine_.

I couldn't tell her that though.

There was a large possibility that it might not be true.

The two men with faces whom I did not recognize walked Bella over to where I was standing. I just noticed now the pile of chains next to me, and realized what they were doing.

Just like they had presumably done with me in my state of unconsciousness, they chained both of her arms and both of her legs to the wall. I didn't want to look in her eyes to have to see the pain that was most likely in them. I didn't want to face whatever was coming, but at the same time, I couldn't look away.

Aro clapped his hands together loudly, causing both of our heads to snap in his direction. "There," he exclaimed, pleased, "Now that everyone's here, we can began."

I remained silent, as did Bella.

This time, it was Marcus who took a step forward. "We must compliment you, Edward," he said in a genuine tone. "You've provided us with a fun game over these past few years. You've made it longer than we would have ever expected." A smile slowly began to creep across his face.

"Unfortunately though," Caius continued, also stepping forward. "This little game will be coming to a quick close." They all laughed in unison. I allowed myself a grimace. "Because, Edward?" He paused as his face slowly spread into a menacing smile. "Votre temps est fini."

I shook my head, refusing to believe that this day would end me. My time was _not_ up.

I shot a quick glance to my side at Bella, but she wasn't looking at me. Instead, her eyes were frozen to the three of their faces; her body completely still. I wanted to give her some words of reassurance, but how could I when I couldn't even assure myself?

"Why?" I blurted out, before I knew what I was doing. "Why are you _doing_ this to me?" The last part came out as a strangled whisper.

Sure enough, their bitter chuckles came quickly afterwards. "Edward!" Aro exclaimed, clapping his hands together once again. "How is it possible that you have not figured out _anything_ yet?" He shook his head. "And I thought you were the smart one here."

As it appeared, I realized that I would possibly never get my answers. They were just having a good time mocking me now.

"Well then let's just get the damn thing over with," I spat at them, glaring. "You've apparently waited _so_ long for this fucking moment, so let's get it over with. _Just kill me already_."

I was amazed with myself at how easily I had let the defeat wash through me. In a low, bleak voice, I made my one and only request. "Please though," I begged quietly, "Please just let Bella go. She's not a part of this."

Marcus laughed again. "Oh, but I'm afraid that she _is_."

Caius went on to finish his thought. "You see, Ed," he smirked, "That's the _fun_ part about this whole thing."

Aro went on, "We've been waiting for this moment for quite some time, as you pointed out before, and I'm afraid that this moment will involve some _quite_ special activities." His hollow snickers filled the room.

"It'll be fun, I promise," Caius smirked in a satisfied tone.

Marcus quickly explained, "You see, we thought about just killing you in front of your Bella, but decided against it." I could tell that Bella was still staring at them with a horrified expression, taking everything in. "But then, the two of you _together_ provided us with many more _exciting_ ideas."

Suddenly, the three of them were serious as each narrowed his eyes. Aro spoke in a quiet, deadly voice. "All of the pain you've inflicted on our broken family is about to haunt you, Edward." He took a few steps closer to me, until he was only a couple feet from my face. "You're about to regret all of the things you and your father have done."

My _father_? The one I had yet to _meet_? I was lost. My confusion only took a moment to get pushed aside by the sudden fury spreading throughout my body.

I started to desperately struggle against the fucking chains, trying to break free from their unbreakable grasp. I yelled loudly once; the sound echoing off the vast walls.

This couldn't be happening.

"Edward," Bella whispered, only audible to my ears. Her voice immediately calmed me, even if we _were_ about to die. "Edward, calm down, it'll be okay."

Bella was famous for that line. _It'll be okay – Everything will be okay – it will all be okay_. Looking into her wide brown eyes full of false hope, for once, I didn't have it in me to try and believe her.

Instead, I took a deep breath and faced the enemies once again. I was ready to face whatever was coming like the man I thought I was. On the outside, I tried to appear fearless for what was about to happen. On the inside, I was scared shitless.

Aro's face was taunting once again, and his smile could not be faltered. "So Edward," He began, pacing slowly in front of me. "Bella's pretty special to you, isn't she?"

I mashed my jaw into a hard line, glaring at him while nodding once in defeat.

"You would be crushed if something were to happen to her, yes?" The harsh teasing didn't fool me one bit. I knew he was being serious. I struggled violently against my chains again as his smile grew more profound.

"Don't you fucking touch her!" My voice echoed from the walls loudly once again.

"Edward, stop," I heard Bella's voice again, only audible for me. "Stop, you'll make it worse." She sounded surprisingly calm. I knew better though. She was trying to hide her fear. Despite what I had taught her, I wanted to tell her that in some cases, it didn't work.

"But _Ed_," Aro sneered, taking a few steps away from me and towards Bella. "What's the fun in _that_?" He began pacing again, only this time there was something different about his walk. It resembled a large jungle cat, about to pounce. I held in another frustrated yell, just like Bella had warned me.

"You see," he began explaining, "I've been thinking. . ." He halted his steps, slowly turning his head so that his eyes were connected to mine. "Killing Bella in front of you would have a much greater effect on you than taking away your life, wouldn't it? Because living with those memories would kill you slowly, and you'd die a little inside everyday, knowing that you could have done something." What kind of fucked-up, masochistic mind did he _have_? That sad thing was, his twistedly deranged plans were correct.

I tried to steady my breathing as I clenched my eyes shut. Every muscle inside of me was tense. "You're a fucking monster." I whispered under my breath. Gritting my teeth tightly together, I added "I'd kill myself before I'd let you kill her!"

His eyes lit up as he clapped his hands together in sarcasm. "Ah! You _are_ a bright boy after all!" He walked over to me once again, placing a hand on my shoulder. "That way, Edward, we won't have to feel guilty about murdering our cousin."

I heard Bella gasp loudly next to me. _Shit_. I forgot I had never told her that part of the story. In fact, I hadn't told her practically any of it at all. I began wondering why I hadn't. After all this time, she had the right to know.

I let out one loud humorless chuckle. "That sure didn't stop your _dad_ from murdering my _mom_."

It was Marcus's turn to laugh now. "I cannot believe you haven't figured it out yet! It's amusing, really, at how in the dark you are with all of this. All of these years, we thought you'd eventually figure it all out, and still. . ._nothing_."

I was beyond caring that I didn't have a clue on what they were talking about. I had way bigger things to be concerned about at the moment.

"Well," Aro proceeded with a victorious smile. "Let's get on with it, shall we?"

Of the two men who had brought Bella in the room, one of them disappeared back into the darkness. An odd thing for me to notice, really. I focused my attention back onto the cheery faces of my fucked up cousins from hell.

"Well we wait," Caius spoke up for the first time in a while, stepping forward and walking until he was only feet away from Bella. "I'd like to try a few things." He turned to smirk at me. "You were able to silently watch your mother suffer," he reminded me, "I wonder if you'll be able to do the same for Bella."

He took another few steps until he was only inches from Bella, towering over her; he was even taller than me. "Let's start with something small." He stated as if he were talking to an audience. The excited faces of Aro and Marcus hardly counted.

"I want to see what you can handle," He told me, a cruel smile at his lips.

Without warning, he slammed himself into her, pushing her up tightly against the wall. He moved his face quickly to hers before she could react, and his lips crushed roughly into her lips. She gasped loudly into his mouth, trying to push him off of her. It was no use though. It was like a baby seal trying to escape a killer whale.

Seeing her kiss another guy definitely killed me to see, thought it wasn't like she had a choice. It wasn't just another guy though – it was the guy who had been trying to kill me for the passed three years. I remained completely silent though, and watched in masked horror as he practically molested her face. After all – I should have been counting my blessings at the moment. Kissing was much more mild than some of the things I knew they were planning.

After what seemed like hours of it, that motherfucker finally removed his face from my girl's. His eyes immediately darted to mine. Once he saw my expression, both of his eyebrows rose. "Wow, Ed." his voice was genuinely in awe. "I'm surprised."

I just stared coldly at him.

"You know, it's a shame we're going to kill her." He said, enjoying himself. "I'd kill for the feel of those lips again. . .maybe somewhere else next time though. Hm. I _do_ envy you her, I'll have to admit."

"Fuck you." I snarled harshly at him.

I could tell that Bella was no longer calm. Finally, realization had dawned on her and the fear had set in. Shooting a quick glance at her to make sure she was okay, I noticed that she was shaking slightly. Whether it was from anger or fear, I had no clue. Knowing Bella though, I probably could have guessed. I longed to touch her – to comfort her in _any_ way.

"Let's try something else. . .?" I heard Aro suggest in a hopeful tone.

Then Marcus chuckled. "Maybe he won't be so at ease if you use this?" I couldn't see what he was holding. Caius walked over to retrieve whatever it was, and I had a split second to see if Bella was alright.

"Are you okay?" I mouthed, horror-struck by the current situation.

She bit her lip and nodded, but that wasn't the case. I caught a sparkle of moisture forming in her eyes as she looked straight ahead – chin up with a brave expression. She was trying. _So _hard. It absolutely killed me to see her falling to pieces like this.

Bella was normally so good at holding herself together. For the first time since I had ever known her, I witnessed her bravery unravel into something horrible.

Pure fear began clouding her eyes as Caius approached once again. I didn't understand her reaction fully until I saw what that motherfucker was holding in his hand.

Small whimpers and pleas began escaping her mouth as she shook her head. My reaction, on the other hand, was much worse. "Stop! Put it down! Leave her the fuck alone and just kill me! _Please_!" My strained yells were drowned out by the three of them's harsh laughter. I thrashed against the cold metal some more as he cautiously approached her with the shiny dagger in his hand.

"Shh," he whispered seductively, bringing a hand up to stroke the length of her hair. "Stay calm, sweetheart. Don't move and I won't kill you." His tone was friendly but deadly.

Bella instantly froze every single muscle in her body. I wasn't even sure she was breathing at the moment. My eyes were wide with terror as he towered over her small form. He flashed me a wicked smile before proceeding to close the distance between the two of them.

He took the knife, slow as a snail, and brought it up to Bella's neck. Everything inside of me also froze as he lifted the small, sharp object closer and closer to her beating pulse.

The sight before me was unbearable. He brought the knife closer and closer to her skin until it was lightly pressed against her soft neck. Her eyes were wide with alarm as she remained completely still. She furiously began blinking back the tears that were now rapidly spilling down her face.

If he pushed that thing even the slightest bit harder, it would break skin, and she would die. The look on his face told me he knew this as well.

I didn't even have it in me to yell anymore. My face crunched up in pain as my breaths came out shallow and labored. "Stop!" Was all I could mouth through my seemingly unmoving lips.

"Funny thing, isn't it?" He chuckled. "Holding ones life in the palm of his hand." He flexed his fingers around the handle he was gripping. "I wonder if this is how my mother felt." He stated in a calm, matter-of-fact voice. "You know, before she was murdered?"

If that was suppose to mean something to me, it just went way over my head. I was so fucking lost, it was ridiculous. First he brings up my father who supposedly has nothing to do with this whole fiasco, _then_ he brings up his mother, who is also absolutely irrelevant to this whole fucking twisted mess.

Out of the corner of her eyes, she was staring into mine. The brown in them was full of meaning; love, devastation, fear, and defeat. The defeat was what scared the hell out of me. It's like with her eyes she was trying to say a last goodbye.

I began shaking my head furiously, growling in harsh denial. His plan all along had been to push my limits. Mission accomplished. I could no longer handle any of this.

"You win!" I told him, my voice dreadfully frustrated, "You wanted to see how far you could push me? Well, congratulations, you've succeeded! I can't take this. _Please_." I begged at a final attempt.

Suddenly, the man who had left to retrieve something earlier walked back into the picture. I couldn't see clearly enough as to what he had in his hands, but I was guessing it was pretty fucking dreadful.

On the plus side, this seemed to distract Caius from what he was doing to Bella, along with Marcus and Aro as well.

Caius lowered the knife, stepping back and returning to the others. I heard Bella's quiet, relieved sigh as she allowed herself a moment of relief. I allowed myself a moment of relief as well as Caius slowly retreated back to his brothers.

A moment that put the term 'short-lived' to shame. Not only did my relief vanish as soon as I saw the _new_ item now visible in their hands, but pain, agony, and abhorrence also took over my body as I widened my eyes in complete shock. My face went completely white.

It wasn't fucking possible.

But it was.

They had the fucking bat.

The same one used to kill my mother.

I remembered every single detail of that bat. I had once played a game of family baseball with it. It was incredibly old; probably antique – dating somewhere back in the early nineties. It was completely wooden with not a single letter of print. It was really worn down from its years of previous use. And most importantly, it had the tiniest stain of blood-red right in the very middle.

I should have known all along that they would go to the farthest measures of the earth to cause me as much suffering as possible. They knew this would be the worst. They knew this would be what fucking killed me. And it would. If I had to watch a repeat of went down three years ago, I would die. I wanted to die.

Bella stared at the bat with worry and fear, but also confusion towards why I was reacting the way I was. Aro seemed to pick out our little silent conversation, stopping it before I even had the chance to apologize for everything.

He took a step out of the darkness and towards the two of us. "Ah, Edward," he exclaimed in a voice that caused the hairs on the back of my neck to stand straight up. He held up the forbidden object, twirling it casually in both hands as he slowly began another pace. "Remember this, do you?"

I kept my eyes locked with this, putting every ounce of hate I had into my glare. He noted Bella's overwhelming confused expression at our interaction and a devious smirk quickly played onto his face. "Perhaps we should enlighten Bella with the story, don't you think? It _is_ a fun one."

My eyes grew impossibly colder and more furious at the nerve he had to even mention that particular memory. Of course, there was nothing I could do about it anyways. I was chained, he wasn't. He had weapons, I was defenseless.

I refused to speak, locking my jaw as I remained a participant in this most deadly stare down. My refusal to speak made him possibly even more thrilled by all of this, causing a smile to filter at his lips. "I'm no good at telling stories," he explained in a tone of fake remorse. "So I'll gladly hand over the job to you."

My nostrils flared as I yanked my arms again, violently trying to escape this impossible nightmare. I had never allowed myself to relive the memory. After it happened, I had locked up every single flash of it, never once letting myself slip and remember the day that had ruined my life.

I wouldn't tell him. I'd rather die first.

I was positive he realized this as well, because as soon as he sensed my defiance, he brought in the only thing that could possibly waver my decision of silence. One second he was in front of me, the next he was hovering the bat besides her shaking body. She stared at me in panic as I stared at him in horror.

"Don't!" I ordered loudly, slamming my fists desperately against the wall in a painful way.

"Unless you want me to kill her in the next ten seconds, _and I'm serious_, tell her the damn story!" He raised his tone for the first time that night as the threat seeped through his words.

Torn, I realized that I had no choice but to obey and do the one thing I had always sworn myself forbidden.

I would have to remember.

But I would do it in a heartbeat for Bella. Because if I didn't, she would die. And I would too.

With a defeated, agonized sigh I slowly unlocked the hidden memories deep from my soul. The impact of every vivid image, every cry of help – every single one of them tearing at my heart, ripping down any form of saneness I had left.

"Well?" He frowned impatiently, gesturing his arms in an up and down manner, illustrating the fact that my ten seconds were almost up.

"Stop," I could only manage to order in a broken whisper. "I'll tell the story."

I took a deep breath, trying to clear my thoughts into happier ones. I don't see why I bothered trying – it's not like I could just wish this all away. I couldn't sit there and pretend I was in this happy place when there wasn't an ounce of joy in my being at that moment.

He seemed satisfied as he lowered the bat. I was about to speak, when his face suddenly lit up. That was a bad sign. An incredibly horrible sign that indicated his plans of torture just became even better than they had been before.

"You know what?" He said in a captivated tone, "My ideas just keep getting better and better. I do believe I have thought of _yet again_ another way to make our time just that much better." I dreaded whatever he was about to say next, and instead of sitting their moping about something I couldn't change, I just glared at him with all the hatred I could manage.

He silently set the bat down on the floor next to him, reaching into his pocket, pulling out a shiny gray key. Bella held still and remained quiet as he unlocked the chains bounding her arms and legs to the wall. As soon as she was standing up straight, free of any metal, he shoved her into the middle of our little circle, in front of both me and his brothers.

She fell to the hard ground as he pushed her there. She didn't even attempt to fight back, because she knew she would loose. Neither of us ever broke the other's gaze.

"So. This is how it's going to work you two." He told us with obvious amusement in his voice. "Edward, while you recap the story, Bella and I shall reenact it out. How does that sound?"

A low growl escaped my mouth as I finally snapped my eyes back to his. The more anger I directed towards him, the more exotically twisted his smile grew. There were a number of profound things I wanted to spit in his face in that moment, but going with wanting to keep Bella alive for as long as possible, I held them back.

Turning to Bella with chivalrous smile, he leaned down to stroke her cheek with the backside of his hand. "This'll be fun, I promise." She no longer looked scared. She looked downright enraged. Though her anger was normally humorous, that definitely wasn't the case now.

Because if she honestly thought she had a chance at bitching him out and remaining alive, she was gravely mistaken. I'm not sure what I was expecting to come out of her mouth, but it definitely wasn't her next words.

"I'm not particularly thrilled with that request," she said in a biting tone.

He rose an eyebrow, clearly surprised by her sudden twist in emotions. I, on the other hand, was not. "Oh?" He asked.

"I see what you're trying to do here," she accused. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised at how calm her tone was either. "You're trying to be clever. You're making Edward retell what happened in clear detail, causing you to demonstrate on me whatever ridiculously cruel things went down that night, making it twice as painful for him to watch." Of course she had even more to say after that. "But, you don't know Edward. He's not going to actually tell the story."

Aro was about to interrupt her little rant but she held up a finger and cut him off. "So when he eventually refuses, you're going to threaten him by saying you'll kill me right away. You won't though, because you'll be bluffing. You're way too amused by all of this to just end it quickly. Hence, the whole baseball bat thing. Edward's scared of you, but doesn't know that overall, he has more power over what you do than anyone here in this room."

"So," she finished with an exasperated sigh. "I'm actually doubting your promise as to how fun this will be."

I think everyone in that room's jaw dropped to the floor. Aro, completely stunned by what had just happened, blinked once with a completely dumbfounded expression. With an impatient sigh, she rose both eyebrows and waited for what his response would be.

Despite the situation, I actually smirked a little, even though I shouldn't have. I couldn't help myself though – to see everyone just gape like fishes? It was too funny to _not_ acknowledge. The only one who wasn't surprised here was me.

Unfortunately, that one fleeting moment of humor quickly vanished as the look on Aro's face indicated that she had only just made matters worse for the both of us. "Well aren't _you_ just a hundred pounds of _fun_." He sneered, rethinking his whole plan back out. He sounded almost as if she had insulted him. Which she basically did.

I watched as the teasing slowly vanished from her eyes. They became wide and nervous as she sat on the cold, hard floor, staring at me with a questioning expression. I had just as much clue what to do at the moment as she did. Unfortunately, there was not a thing I could think of to tell her that would make any of this better.

I was basically drowning in my own self-hatred at the moment. I _knew_ this was what would happen if I became close to her. Yet, I somehow had managed to convince myself otherwise. I had managed to think up this wonderful world with just me, her, and a normal life. Never once had I factored in the fact that I was not normal.

This was what I had been warning her about since day one: That my hell would end up consuming her in its hateful fury. It wasn't fair. It wasn't right. And dammit, where was the _justice_?

When I couldn't see the future, I was scared. But now – now that the future was clear, it hurt to see.

I hadn't been realistic, practical, or smart about any of this. I would have gladly paid the price for my mistakes – I would have let them torture me for hours on end, taunting me with my broken up past and loss of anything good in life. I wanted them to, because I deserved it.

Unfortunately, Aro had other plans. "Listen, Bella it is right?" He asked in a snide tone as she nodded in nervous confirmation. "You've got to learn your place in this world. Your rich daddy can't buy you out of this mess, so I'm curious as to how you think you're going to fix it?"

She stared down at the ground, refusing to answer his question as I watched her brave facade wear off. His loud humorless chuckles bounced off the walls as he slowly circled around her. "That's what I thought."

"Now," he stated coldly, focusing back on what he had started. "Where were we before I was so _rudely_ interrupted?" He shot me a merciless, taunting smile before his gaze fell back on Bella. "So, Bella, if my idea is so bad, I'd like to know what would be a better one?"

I wondered how long he would keep up his twisted games. It was beginning to make me sick – watching the three of them circling around her like hawks as she sat helplessly on the hard ground.

She quietly cleared her throat and looked up at him with soft, pleading eyes. "Kill me," she begged in a barely audible voice. I wasn't even sure I heard her at first. "Let him go, and you can kill me."

He seemed amused by this idea, like he hadn't thought of it before. I knew he was just humoring her by pretending to consider it. I knew better than to think he would actually comply to her request and spare me my life.

Not that I wanted it to be spared if they were going to kill her.

If she died, so did I. Tit for tat.

"Bella." I gritted angrily through my teeth, ignoring the others in the room. "Don't you dare pull this shit."

Her head snapped towards mine as we locked eyes. Her's were sparkling with unshed moisture once again as she gave me the most devastating look I had ever seen in my life. "I have to." She mouthed, pleading in her voice that I would understand.

I did, but sure as hell wasn't about to let her throw it all away for me. Again.

"Stop!" I ordered in a loud, curt tone. I directed my hateful gaze on the three of them. "This is ridiculous – Do we really need to involve another innocent person? You know it's me you want, so just get it over with already."

Bella narrowed her eyes. "Don't listen to him," she demanded. "Let him go and take me instead."

"_Bella_," I groaned in a mixture of exasperation and desperation. Couldn't she just listen to me_ once_? "I'm not letting you do this to yourself. Knock it off, I'll be fine." But I wouldn't. And she knew this as well.

I watched as a few tears escaped her eyes and ran down her soft cheeks. "No," she whispered, shaking her head.

"Oh for the love of God. . ." I heard Caius mutter in irritation.

Aro had a different reaction, however. He clapped his hands together joyously. "This is just _wonderful_!" He practically sang. "I never knew anything could be so satisfying. I mean, it's mushy and disgusting, but at the same time it's oh so _amusing_. What makes it even better is that I haven't decided which one of you to kill yet!" If I'd have known any better, his excitement was about to become the climaxing end of both our existences. Bella had been right – He was far too excited about this than it was healthy to be.

I refused to look at him though, never breaking my determined gaze from Bella's. We were having a silent conversation, each begging the other not to do this. I didn't have any other options though, and if my life was what was to be forfeited in order for her to live, then I'd give it in a heartbeat.

What if your actions ended up ruining someones life? How do you pay for what you've done? Besides death, I didn't see how else I was suppose to make up for my mistakes.

All my existence in this world had done was cause others pain, suffering, and devastation. How was it possibly okay for her to give away her life just so that I could continue that horrendous pattern?

Of course, I was probably reading into all of this way too much. It was obvious that his intentions would end up killing the both of us in the end. I continued to protest with her using my eyes, begging her to stop what she was doing.

Aro watched our silent exchange in awed fascination. He suddenly laughed out loud at a thought running through his mind before he spoke. With the most cheerful expression on his face, he took a step towards me.

"Edward." He stated simply, "Who do you want me to kill?"

"Me." I answered through my gritted teeth without skipping a beat. He laughed to himself once again before turning completely around, facing Bella with this back to me.

Using the same tone, he proceeded on with asking her the same question. She responded herself of course, and I moaned quietly to myself, closing my eyes as I muttered a string of profanities under my breath.

Moments went by before anyone said a single world. Eventually, after consulting his brothers, Marcus was the one to speak. "We've come to a plan." He paused, raising an eyebrow at Bella to see if there would be another outburst of disapproval. Thankfully, she kept her trembling mouth shut.

"We are all going to leave and give you two five minutes. _Five minutes_, do you understand? During those five minutes, you will decide on who's to die. If you don't come to an agreement, well then I can't guarantee you anything pleasant will come out of _that_ scenario. However, if you manage to choose one or the other, we will spare the one not being killed their life, and they may proceed on with however they wish." He shot a bitter smirk in my direction.

"Shall we, boys?" Aro asked in a smug, resolved tone as he gestured his hand to the dark exit that I couldn't see.

"I just want to try one thing." Caius suddenly exclaimed.

One movement was all it took. One swift, harsh movement that caused my frame to shake with the impact of the memories that flooded through me. For a moment, I was brought back to a place I never wanted to be – I was questioning whether this really was some surreal, frightening dream, or just the brutal reality I had been facing all along.

Bella screamed out in pain; the blood curling sound echoed from the spacious room, ripping and tearing its way through me like a knife. I let out a soundless, strangled yell from my unmoving lips as I watched her cripple to the ground in horror from the impact of that bat Caius had swung so hard at her body.

He was satisfied enough with what the first blow had done to her, so he turned around and joined the others as they all slowly shuffled from the dark room. "Five minutes," Marcus chuckled before shutting and locking the door they left from.

I moaned loudly in frustration, slamming my chained fists at the hard wall once again. She laid on the ground, silently trembling from the soft crying she was doing. I couldn't see her face, because she had it buried in her long curly hair. "Bella," I pleaded softly, "Bella are you okay?" I had nothing to say to her anymore. Nothing other than I was sorry, and I knew those were the last words she wanted to here. She managed to give me a nod, though something told me she was lying.

She spent a minute of the five we had recovering until eventually, she slowly forced herself into a sitting position. I knew what was coming, and so did she. A whole another round of fresh tears begin to form in her eyes as she silently pleaded with me.

"Edward," her voice cracked. "_No_."

With all my finality and refusal, I hoped my expression still came out to be softer than my voice. "Bella, no. I won't let you. It has to be this way. _It has to_." She began shaking her head as hot tears streamed down her cheeks.

I knew I was right, because I had given up refusing to believe it a long time ago. I had to die. For her. Her denial on the whole thing was just making all of this so much harder to accept. "You can't," she began repeating in a whisper.

I shut my eyes for a moment, trying to hold myself together. The severe amount of pain I was inflicting on the both of us was unbearable. It wasn't right to suffer this way. At least, it wasn't for her. She wasn't a part of this and damn it, I wasn't going to let her be.

So I lifted my face, looking straight into her damaged brown eyes full of poignancy and spoke the only words I could think of to make her understand my perspective on things. "I can't loose you." It came out in a barely audible, defeated whisper.

The only response she had for that was more tears.

Suddenly, a door from somewhere flew open. Alarmed, I thought our five minutes were already up. That was, until I realized the door had been opened from the opposite side the Volturi had left from. Bella became frozen in her position, staring at me with wide eyes as I watched the figure slowly reveal themselves.

Crazy, tangled red hair finally shown in the light, and I was very near being speechless. "_Vicky_?" I asked, completely stunned.

Victoria was the sister of the three. The one rarely anyone knew about. She hadn't gone into hiding while her brothers had, and instead, worked in various places of the city. The last I had seen her had been that night, three years ago.

Her face was frantic as she rushed over to where I was bound to the wall. Bella shot me a very nervous look, but I shook my head as I watched her pull something out of her pocket. She had never been one for violence, unlike the rest of the family, and always managed to stay out of their sick games. I was fairly positive she wasn't here to kill us.

She shot me a small smile before unlocking my hands and feet in a hurried banner. Despite everything I had been through the past few years, she was the one person who had never turned against me. I pulled her into a hug as soon as I was free. She made our embrace short though, pulling away and quickly glancing at Bella.

"Listen," she whispered urgently. "Be as quiet as possible. I happened to be in the shop when I heard the news that you and some girl had been captured. I've been waiting for them to leave you alone, but I think they'll be back any minute."

Was this really possible? Was it really that easy? I nodded with an overwhelming amount of gratitude put into a thankful smile before rushing over to Bella.

Without any effort or hesitation, I picked up her small body in my arms, cradling her to my chest. Her face was wet and bewildered as I kissed her softly on the forehead with smile – It was the only explanation I had time to give her at the moment. She sensed that things were about to be looking up for us and relaxed in my arms as she rested her head on my chest in exhaustion. I turned back to Victoria.

"There's a door – the one I came in? That's leading right outside. Once you get out you run. Find a car and go. Get to the safest place possible and stay the hell away from anywhere near where they found you." I nodded.

Knowing we were extremely pressed for time, I gave her a last smile – one that couldn't express in words the praise and thankfulness I had for her. "Thank you, Vick. For everything." My voice cracked.

She returned a warm smile before quickly gesturing her eyes towards the direction of the door. Unsure of Bella's current condition, I kept her tightly in my arms as I ran to where I assumed the door to be, never stumbling once in my haste.

Bella grasped on tightly to my shirt as I kicked the door open all the way with my foot. From being inside that dark room for so long, the bright sun was blinding, and it took me a few moments to get used to the brightness. It wasn't so much that it was overly light outside, it's just that we had been in the dark for a while. The sun was actually just beginning to set.

Bella was squinting as well when she looked up at me. "Where the hell are we?" She asked in a panicked voice.

What a small world – we were in an alley. It was much bigger and wider than my alley, but it was an alley none the less. I began a brisk jog towards the mouth of it, hoping we'd have some clue as to where we were.

I turned the corner once we got to the end of the alley and began making my way down the sidewalk in a fast, pacing walk, knowing that it'd only be a matter of time before they realized that we had disappeared. I wondered if Vicky would get hurt because of us. I prayed to God not.

I made a mental promise to myself that if we made it out of this mess alive, I'd track her down and find her somehow and give her a more appropriate thank you for what she had done today.

Bella squirmed in my arms, adjusting her position. "I think I can walk," she told me calmly. I gave her a skeptical look, raising an eyebrow. "Put me down so I can see." She ordered softly.

Carefully, I set her down so that she was standing upright. For the most part, she seemed fairly sturdy. She tested out her balance by walking a few steps. The small grimace she made as she put one foot in front of the other did not escape my notice. In pain or not, she decided she was swallowing that shit because we were pretty pressed for time.

"Sure you don't want me to carry you?" I asked, double checking one last time if she could handle this. She had gotten hit pretty hard.

"I'm fine," she lied with a smile.

Not wanting to start an argument whether I believed her or not, I took her hand tightly in mine and we began running once again. The sidewalks were surprisingly empty as I began scanning my eyes for an available car. I had never 'borrowed' one during daylight – it was pretty fucking risky, but we really had no choice; there was only so long she could run before she'd start hurting again.

I finally selected an abandoned old, beat up Rabbit – it was so trashy that I was fairly positive it'd take more to dispose of than actually sell the thing. The owner wouldn't miss it much. "There," I pointed to it, tugging her towards the old car. She didn't hesitate to dive right into the passenger seat as I flew myself into the driver's seat.

I think I broke my all-time record for the amount of time taken to hot wire a car, because less than a thirty seconds later I was peeling out onto the road and speeding away from the area. The car's engine whined in protest as I pressed my foot down harder on the gas pedal.

As I sped away, things finally began to look familiar. We were around ten miles from my place, which relieved me to know that their 'hideout' wasn't within that close of a distance from where either of us lived.

I spoke up. "Where should we go?" She'd been silent for a while, so I figured she'd have a better idea than me.

"My place," she stated as if it were an obvious answer. I hesitated with her response for a moment, pursing my lips. I wanted to stay away from the shop for a while, just in case they had any leads on where it was. It's not like they didn't no where Bella's house was though.

She responded to my questions before I could even ask them. "Charlie's home tonight," she told me, "Nothing will happen with him there. I can just sneak you in somehow, alright?" I nodded, because it was the only option we had. She still wasn't meeting my eyes – her head was resting on the window as she stared out at the scenery that passed by.

"Are you okay?" I asked her softly.

She darted her eyes quickly to mine then away again before slightly nodding and closing her eyes. I removed one hand from the steering wheel, reaching it over to take hers. I stared at the features of her soft face, wondering how in the hell anyone could even think about attempting to hurt her.

"I'm scared." She admitted in a whisper that I barely heard.

Turning on to the intersection that would take us to her home, I began stroking soft circles on her hand with my thumb. "Don't be. I'm here."

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Pain - Three Days Grace

_I am not kidding you around when I say that 3DG is all I listened to this chapter. Seriously. I felt hard-fucking-core._

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Votre temps est fini _- "your time is finished"

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**Reviews are better than baseball-bat-beatdowns.**


	15. Aucun Regrettes

******Ah, you guys spoil me.  
Really, I love you all too much.  
Yeah, I say it a lot. But it's true.  
Give yourselves all pats on the back.  
YOU WINNERS.  
You guys are the fucking best.  
Edward appreciates you.**

* * *

**Bella - Aucun Regrettes**

"Are you okay?" He repeated for the thousandth time. Those were really the only words he had spoken since we arrived at my house and already I was tired of hearing them. I was fine. Not perfect, not good, but fine. I could manage. I hurt like hell but it wasn't anything I couldn't easily live through.

"Yes, I am." I responded yet again without a glance in his direction. I couldn't look at his eyes, because I knew I wouldn't be able to bear what I saw in them. According to him, this was all his fault and he deserved to die.

According to me, mistakes happen – life goes on.

As much as I wish I could have convinced myself otherwise though, things weren't that simple. After everything that had just happened, things were going to need to start changing for us. Everything we thought we knew was wrong, thus creating the impression that we were now both helpless and clueless as to how we were suppose to proceed with this.

When we had arrived home, Edward had parked the 'borrowed' car a few blocks away from the house so that the owner could eventually find it and no charges would be filed. Emmett had dropped the Volvo off at my house as a request of Edward, and afterwards was picked up by Jazz as a request of Emmett. After that had happened, his mood had gone drastically down hill since then.

I was sitting comfortably on my bed as he stood at the window with a torn expression and a hard jaw, staring out at nothing. He had been there for the passed half hour and showed no signs of moving anytime soon.

I let out a frustrated sigh, as I rested my elbows on my knees and buried my face in my hands. I knew this was bad. He would never forgive himself for what had happened, and would be constantly beating himself up about all of it for absolutely nothing.

And there wasn't a damn thing I could do to break him out of it this time.

The knowledge of this made my insides ache. There had never once been a time where I couldn't make him feel better, or comfort him, or even make him smile. This time was different though, and I knew him well enough to know that the path to get him out of this self misery would be a long walk on pins and needles.

"I'm fine." I repeated, louder this time and more sure of my answer, even though it was far from the truth.

It was no longer my aching body that caused me pain anymore. It was the way he looked at me – the way every feature about his face was just wrong. He didn't look like Edward; he looked as if he had been shattered into a million pieces.

His eyes were all wrong – the glassy, sparkling, liquid emeralds had formed to become cold, guarded, and solid. The strain in his neck made it clear that his teeth were gritted tightly together. Everything about him just screamed affliction.

Edward was the suffer in silence type, so he wouldn't ever allow other's to know what he was feeling – he'd never mention how he was truly feeling if I asked him if he was alright. I already knew the answer anyways though. It wasn't that hard to guess.

All he needed was a good, long night's rest to sleep all of this garbage off. I knew that was the last thing he wanted at the moment though. If he could have it his way, he would be standing their all night wallowing in completely horrific self-hatred for himself and the world.

This pain that was tormenting him now was the ultimate torture, and even though the Volturi had not succeeded to do away with either of us. . .yet. . .they had still managed to cut into him with their tauntingly bitter remarks, causing him the equivalent amount of pain it would have been to actually stab him with some sharp object.

Speaking of the Volturi, I was so confused about them at the moment, I didn't even bother trying to wrap my head around it all. Apparently, they were his cousins. His _cousins_. I just couldn't get passed that fact.

If they were his cousins, then the uncle who had beaten his mom to death must have been their dad, who according to Edward was locked safely in a jail cell.

I was done accepting that I would never know his full past. I realized now that in order for this to work, I needed every detail there possibly was. I was never one for prying on personal subjects, but I had no choice anymore. We were out of time.

I would wait a little while first though. Let him get over some of this first before opening up the fresh wounds his memories created. I would manage to find the best way possible to figure out what I needed to without harming him in anyway. Though it seemed inevitable, I knew it was possible somehow.

I reached for my phone, dialing Alice's number. "Hello?"

"Hey, it's Bee." I told her with a forced smile. "Listen, Edward and I are gonna crash at my place tonight, so no need to wait up for us." I tried to sound as casual as I could, but she somehow managed to see beyond my calm facade.

"Alright," she sounded hesitant, "Is something wrong?"

"No," I assured her, feeling shitty for lying. "Not really. We're fine." Another lie. Clearly, neither one of us was remotely close to being semi-decent. "I'll call you tomorrow, okay? Edward says goodnight."

I ended the call, setting my phone next to me. I wondered when he was finally going to tell them everything. Maybe they'd be able to help us somehow. I almost wanted to ask him but he was suddenly walking swiftly over to my bed.

Picking up my phone and holding it closely to his face, he stared at it very carefully as if searching for something. I rose an eyebrow with a confused expression on my face. "What are you–?"

"Did you have this on you while we were _there_?" I just stared at him. "With you, I mean. Did you have it with you or something?"

I nodded carefully, still not sure where he was going with this. All of sudden he threw my iPhone harshly to the floor. In shock, I watched it shatter into a million tiny metal pieces. My jaw dropped as I slowly looked up at him in horror.

He rolled his eyes at my expression, but his face still seemed rather concerned. "You have to get a new one. They could have chipped you or something," he exclaimed briskly before finally sighing and sitting down on my bed.

I nodded, cursing myself internally for being so stupid about not realizing it myself. "Thanks," I spoke to him in a soft, quiet voice, referring to numerous things other than just that.

He let out a humorless chuckle while shaking his head. An expression of disgust crossed his face as he stared away from me once again to anywhere but my face. "Don't thank me," he ordered harshly, "I did this to you."

I parted my lips slightly as I narrowed my eyes at him. This had to stop immediately. I didn't want to fight with him – not now – but damn it, he was making things so hard. Couldn't he ever just accept the fact that we were in this together?

"Look. At. Me." I stated loudly to him.

My harsh tone caught him off guard and he snapped his head up to meet my gaze. We stared at each other for a few moments of silence. I glared, he frowned.

"This shouldering the blame shit? It's got to stop. _Now_. I can't be with you when you're like this. I wish I could help you but you make it so hard for me sometimes. You have to just get it through your head that _we're in this together_. You can't control things that happen, so stop blaming yourself when something goes wrong."

The more I spoke, the more devastating his expression became. My words wouldn't stop though – I was letting out everything I had kept in me for the passed week whether I wanted to or not.

"I know you're a selfless person, and believe me, I love that about you, but sometimes you just go too far. We're both fine as of right now. We're not dead, and I think I'm planning on keeping it that way for a while. So frankly, I'd rather be taking the time to appreciate each other instead of sulking in silence."

He just stared at me with a mask of tragic sadness, refusing to speak.

There was so much that needed to be said; so many things that needed to be figured out, declared, and thought over, but now was not the time. My head was spinning with wild questions and I was guessing his could have only been ten times worse. It wasn't the time for this now though. We'd wait until tomorrow, I decided.

"I'm ready for bed." I whispered, never taking my eyes from him.

He didn't respond at first as he just stared back at me. "You can go to sleep," he told me quietly, "I'll just be up for a little bit."

"No." I cut him off curtly then softened my expression. "I can't. I need you with me." I explained simply, biting my lip and staring down at my hands. "I need to feel safe." I murmured, barely audible for even my own ears.

I knew he heard it though, because when I finally looked back up at him to meet his gaze, his expression had changed into understandment and desire as he too wished for the same thing.

I silently got up and quickly got ready for bed. Charlie and Renee remained completely oblivious two floors below us as I latched the lock on my door and made my way back over to my bed. Since I wasn't gone any longer than I normally would have been out on a Friday night, there wasn't a single suspicion as to what was going on.

Edward was already lying in the bed waiting for me when I walked back in the room. A while ago, him and I had stashed extra clothes for each of us in the Volvo in case of an emergency, so pajamas weren't an issue. He had on some old, holey band shirt and a pair of old sweats. His hands were behind his head and he was staring up at the ceiling with that same locked jaw.

I turned off the lights before I crawled into bed next to him, trying not to cringe as I situated myself next to his warm body. My lower abdomen absolutely killed from the impact of the wretched baseball bat, though I tried to hide it from Edward as best I could.

As soon as I was next to him, his stiff posture finally relaxed – not enough to assure me he wasn't afflicting any more pain on himself; just enough to relieve me for now. I wouldn't bother him until tomorrow. _Then_, I would give him hell for not just letting this go.

He slowly rolled over to his side to face me, pulling me into his arms as I scooted my body up against him. The more we adjusted our positions, the more I had to bite back a painful moan. As soon as his arms constricted around me, I couldn't stop the tedious hiss from escaping my lips. He instantly became completely frozen next to me.

I heard a distressed sigh come from his mouth as he hung his head sadly into my neck. "I'm okay," I assured him in a whisper. All we needed was a change in position and I knew I'd be fine.

The throbbing became worse as I attempted to gently push him so that he was lying on his back. He quickly complied my silent request, adjusting himself into the covers as I slowly moved myself on top of him.

The dreadful feeling soon became less profound once I was comfortably resting on top of him. I was spread over the length of his body with my head resting exhaustedly on his chest. It took him a few moments to move, still bewildered from my apparent suffering.

Once I let out a content sigh to assure him I was okay, he carefully brought his arms up to wrap gently around my body once again. I let my eyelids flutter closed at the comforting touch of his embrace around me.

"I'm sorry, Bella." He whispered to me in remorse, "I'm so, so sorry."

It would strain my aching muscles too much if I attempted leaning up to kiss him, so I settled for a soft kiss on his broad chest, showing him that I wasn't mad in the slightest bit. I felt his lips press softly to the top of my head as his face lingered in my hair a few moments.

The exhaustion of the day's events finally took over my body, causing me to be overtaken by a deep slumber.

I woke up in the same position I had fallen asleep in, only something was different. Edward. Sleepily, I felt around with my hands for him. It didn't take me too long to realize that he wasn't there. Trying my best to remain calm, I slowly sat up my stiff body. Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I looked around the room only to find nothing. Where the hell was he?

Both worried that something bad had happened and hurt that he would just leave, I rolled out of bed – literally – and walked to my closet to get my robe. The soft, fluffy fabric made me feel more comfortable as I slowly cracked my door open. Maybe he just went to the bathroom?

I heard laughter coming from downstairs, sounding a lot like my mom and dad's. Charlie was here? Normally he never was in the mornings. Or at all, for that matter. Suddenly curious, I crept out of my room and made my way down the grand staircase.

I followed the voices, leading me into the kitchen. I froze in the doorway at the sight before me.

Standing facing the stove, my father was attempting to cook eggs with a large grin on his face. Leaning on the counter nearby him was my always chipper mother with a chivalrous smile on her face, chatting up a storm with Edward. _Edward_. I was so confused.

Edward, focused on my mother's pointless chatter somehow sensed my presence and darted his eyes in my direction. Besides the confusion, I felt relief that his eyes were slightly better than they had been last night. They were lighter, and less tormented. He still had that stressed crease on his forehead, but I knew it would go away in time.

Charlie also seemed to notice me at the same time Edward did. "Mornin' sleepy head," he chuckled happily as I took in his casual appearance. He had on fleece pajama pants and an old white T-shirt. I don't think I had ever seen Charlie in _non_ work clothes.

I flashed him a smile, but my eyes remained locked with Edward's. "Edward," I appraised in a surprised voice, "What are _you_ doing here?"

My mom flashed me a dazzling smile with a look that told me she thought she was all knowing and shit about our relationship. "He wanted to come see you," she waggled her eyebrows and my father chuckled at her. "I didn't think there was a point in making him come back later since I knew you'd wake up eventually, so your dad and I have been keeping him company."

Well alright then. This was unusual. And awkward. I shuffled over to peak at what Charlie was making in the frying pan. I frowned at the burnt scrambled eggs, shaking my head as I let out a quiet laugh. "Oh, dad, you shouldn't have." I mumbled as I reached for the cup of coffee he had poured me early I was guessing.

I was so confused. Going along with all of this, I walked over and sat down in the stool besides Edward as I pretended that all of this was perfectly normal. Clearly, normality wasn't any of our specialties though, so I wasn't sure what everyone was trying to play here.

Being subtle about it, I took in Edward's change of appearance. He had on different clothes and smelled of some sweet, floral shampoo, looking a lot cleaner than he had when he had gone to sleep last night. I smirked a little at the realization of him stealing my shampoo.

If I were being honest, what I really wanted was to just be alone with Edward so we could sort shit out. It wasn't something he was clearly avoiding, but something that just couldn't _not_ be faced. I decided to thrill my parents by remaining a participant to their joyful attitudes.

I shot Edward a concerned look because I noticed he had become rigid and stiff in his chair next to me. I refused to believe that I was the problem here, but I just couldn't ignore the fact that it was like he couldn't even look at me.

We all sat there for a bit in a light silence as my dad gave up on the eggs and just poured everyone a bowl of cereal. Renee and him joined as in the two stools that were left at the counter. I began shoving the Fruity Pebbles in my mouth, hoping to avoid conversation leading to anything relevantly important in our lives.

"Bells," Charlie exclaimed in almost a teasing tone. "Why haven't I ever met Edward?" My dad flashed Edward a grin as they exchanged some sort of look indicating to me that I probably wasn't interested in the conversation that had gone down before I had arrived.

I shrugged. There were many answers I could have given him to that question. You're never around was one of the main ones, but that seemed to harsh. Instead I settled for a grimace in his direction, knowing that the conversation before had presumably been revolved around yours truly.

"I don't know, I guess," I mumbled grumpily into my bowl.

"She is our little ray of sunshine, aren't ya Bells?" He chuckled to Edward while ruffling my hair. I glared daggers at those damn pebbles of fruit while holding back a grimace. "Just a warning, Edward," Charlie continued in a playfully teasing tone. "Don't make her mad. She gets ugly in the mornings."

My dad, the child.

"Oh believe me, Charlie," Edward laughed, _still _avoiding me. "I think I've learned that one already." I didn't get it. How could he casually joke with my father at complete ease, and not handle sending me one reassuring glance indicating that he was okay? It was becoming clearer and clearer that he wasn't.

The more I ate, the more 'fun' I got poked at me, as my lovely mother had put it. "Oh, come on, Bella! They're just having a good time being guys and poking fun at you. Be a good sport." I grumbled at that one.

As soon as my the topic switched on to making fun of my loser junior high boyfriend selection, I got up, aggressively dumped my bowl in the sink, and proceeded to stomp up the stairs and back into my room.

As I huffed, crossing my arms and sitting on my bed, I realized that I didn't have it in me to be bitter about something so stupid. Even though he might have been ignoring _me_ for whatever odd reason, he was getting a long with my parents. That was a big deal for both them _and_ him.

So when he walked in the room no more than five minutes later, instead of glaring at him I grimaced. But my tolerance wore off the moment his eyes wandered to anywhere except my face. I snapped.

"What the hell is your problem?" I asked in both hurt and irritation.

"I don't know what you mean," he mumbled distractedly.

I narrowed my eyes. "I think you do." I didn't want to fight with him – I never did; it was always the last thing I wanted to do, but sometimes he gave me no choice. If he wasn't going to explain his bizarre behavior, I wasn't going to just sit around and be all honky dory with it.

He slid his hands into his pockets, hanging his head down to the floor as he slowly walked over and sat down on the edge of my bed. I heard him sigh quietly before slipping back into more silence.

I instantly regretted my harsh behavior towards him. I was being the biggest bitch – something I had promised myself long ago never to fully unleash on him. But I was. And it was hurting him even more than whatever was initially there to start with.

I sighed too, full of remorse and sorrow at the realization of my actions doing more harm than good. I decided to take a different course with my original plan.

"Why won't you look at me?" I asked sadly in a soft voice.

I saw him shake his head and close his eyes. "I can't." He whispered, followed by a long pause and then, "When I look at you, I hurt." He confessed in a tone that suggested he was struggling to get the words out. "I can't stop replaying it in my mind, Bee." He breathed so quietly I could barely hear him. "I'm trying so hard to forget about it. I know that if I look at you, all I'll see is what happened yesterday. I'll see you broken on that floor again – I'll hear your piercing scream and remember how close you had been to dying. . ." He trailed off until I could no longer hear him.

Everything made sense now. I had never really taken the time to grasp my head around how hard all of this must really be on him. "How can I make it better?" I asked in a hopeful whisper, moving myself so that I was sitting besides in, resting my head on his shoulder.

"Tell me you never want to see me again," he said sadly. "Tell me I'm a horrible person for letting this happen, and that you hate me for it. Tell me to leave, so I won't hurt you like this anymore."

What a ridiculous request. Even _he_ had to have known how unreasonable it was. "Edward," I told him, reaching my hand out to trace the shape of his lightly with my fingers. "The only way you can hurt me is by holding my hand too tight." I sighed, "Please believe me when I say I don't regret anything that's happened between us. If all of this has only brought us closer together, how can you regret it?"

"Aucun regrettes," He responded back in a serious tone. "I wish I could say the same for me." He shook his had sadly.

"You've got to _stop_," I moaned, burying my face in my hands. "Please, stop. It's okay, I promise. Just look at me?" I requested softly. "I wanna see those pretty eyes," I smiled playfully, the same moment he finally brought his eyes to mine.

I knew he would be okay once he saw I was, because a small smile spread on his lips as we stared at each other. I wrapped both arms around him, leaning up to kiss him on the cheek, silently thanking him for listening to me.

I sighed contently, keeping my head on his shoulder as I played with his fingers. "So. How was your morning?" I asked casually, curious as to what his response would be.

"Interesting." He chuckled under his breath before giving me a real answer. "I woke up at like five and showered, changed clothes, took the Volvo to Jasper's and told them not to hang around my place for a while, and that I would be with you for the next few weeks. Then I came back here and your parents so kindly let me in, and you know the rest."

I knew he was leaving out the details that he didn't want to hear, but I accepted his answer with a smile and a nod, wondering how the hell he managed to do all of this without causing even the slightest suspicion from my dad, one of the most top security people in the country.

I excused myself to quickly shower and change clothes while he lounged casually on my bed with a seemingly carefree expression on his face. I studied him out of the corner of my eye, and every once and a while I would see a hint of worry or stress cross his face, but it never appeared to stay there very long.

"So," I asked hesitantly as I wrapped my wet hair up into a towel, "What's the plan?"

"Well." He began with a hint of frustration as he furrowed his eyebrows together. "If I was being honest, I'd tell you that I don't have a fucking clue. _But_, since I know that's not the answer you want to hear, I'll just say I'm thinking about it. Deal?" I beamed at him. I knew I picked the right one.

I was trying to go about this all in the lightest way possible so not to result in his dark mood once again. Admittedly though, I was doing my absolute best to decide how we should proceed with all of this. It was obvious that I was in the dark with a lot of things in the situation, but from what I had seen and heard yesterday, it appeared that Edward didn't have knowledge on everything either.

"So they're your cousins?" I asked casually, suggesting that he could tell me to stop pressing if he wanted to. All he did was nod, but at least that was something, so I kept going. "They said a lot to you yesterday," I paused. "Was any of it a surprise?"

Completely taking me off guard, he actually decided to give me a full, detailed response of his thoughts on the subject. "My dad. They talked about my dad a lot, and I wasn't even aware that he was_ part_ of all of this. They kept saying it was his fault that this was happening to me or something like that, and I had no idea what they were talking about. I've never even_ met_ the guy." He didn't seem sad about this – just thoroughly upset on how little knowledge he had on the subject.

I rubbed his back in a soothing manner, giving him a wide smile. He may have just solved the answer to our main question on how to proceed with this. "Edward," I told him in a serious tone, "I think that might be our answer. I think there's more to the story that not even _you_ know, and I think we need to get to the bottom of it." Detective Bella. Fuck yeah.

I could tell that he realized it to, but was shaking his head before I could let myself get my hopes up. "I've never met him, Bella." He explained as if the concept were impossible for me to understand. "I don't know where he lives, and I don't even think I know his real name. Besides," he paused to sigh, "Why the hell would he want to talk to me? He didn't want to when I was kid, so he sure as hell won't now."

"Hey," I snapped at his completely pessimistic attitude, "Maybe you're looking at it the wrong way. Maybe there was another reason you never met him. Ever consider that? I mean, come on, Edward – You don't know a thing about this man, so how can you jump to negative conclusions right away?"

"Because," he almost growled, "I've gotten my hopes up far too many fucking times and I don't want to have to deal with _that_ again."

I ignored his comments, refusing to let him sway me away from something that I was clearly on to. "We're going to find him," I stated simply and finally, indicating that it was not up for debate, "And we're going to get your answers."

We had a long, immature, childish stare down for about a minute straight before defeat finally flashed in his eyes. "Gah," he moaned, shaking his head and looking away while running a hand through his hair. "Fine, you win."

I smiled. Because I always did.

He was right. It had been nearly impossible to find anything on his mysterious father at all. But we somehow managed to, after a long, _long_ process.

"See, it says here that him and your mother never got a divorce!" I pointed out enthusiastically to the screen of my laptop. "That's gotta mean something. I _told_ you. There's a definite story behind all of this, I'm telling you."

Instead of being as excited as I was, he looked at me with a bit of concerned mockery, indicating that he was silently judging my sanity. I wasn't crazy. Obsessed, maybe. But definitely not crazy. He would definitely thank me for all this shit in the long run.

"I don't get it," he muttered to himself. "If they weren't divorced, then why the complete lack of communication?"

I shrugged. "There's gotta be a reason," I repeated, refraining from sounding anything remotely giddy, because I knew that would definitely scare him. I couldn't help it. After having nothing for so long, we finally found _something_. I was an optimist. Sue me.

"It says 'Occupation: Unknown'," he pointed out, sounding doubtful about my excitement.

I quickly shook my head, "That just means it's not available to be listed by the government. If he didn't have one, it would say so."

He gave me a dubious look, raising an eyebrow. "Should I be concerned that you're aware of background checks this much?" He teased in a skeptically playful voice.

I narrowed my eyes, ignoring his comment as I read more into Carlisle Cullen. Aside from the fact that he was apparently never divorced to Esme Cullen, Edward was right – there really wasn't much else there.

"We have to go," I told him calmly, hoping not to upset him. He stared at me. "To Arizona, Edward." I explained, biting my lip as I waited for his reaction.

Instead of blowing up and lecturing me on how crazy I was, he simply looked at me with a polite smile. "You've got to be fucking kidding me."

I slowly shook my head. "You know I'm not."

Shaking _his_ head, he gave me an eye roll, "I wish you were." He sighed, letting himself fall back into the pillows as he rubbed his hands over his eyes. "You know what?" He mumbled into his hands, "From now on, you're in charge. I no longer trust myself with all this shit. If you think it's a good idea, then so be it, I'll do whatever you want." Really?

"Really?" I asked in a tiny voice full of surprise.

"Geez, is it _that_ big of surprise I'm finally giving up being a dick for once?" He snickered at me with a grimace. I beamed back at him, nodding and suddenly enthused with the idea of going out of state with him.

Of course, the parents were an issue. . .Eh, I'd deal with them later.

I snapped back into 'detective Bella' mode. "Kay, so I was thinking we should leave as soon as possible. One, because we need answers like super quick. And two, because it's the perfect time to disappear from the Volturi for a while, because lord knows they might be just a little more than pissed at us with what happened. . .So yeah – leaving immediately would be our best option."

"Now that you mention it," he sounded thoughtful, "That is the perfect idea." He admitted in a tone that indicated how surprised he was that I thought it up myself. Insulting, really.

"Of course it is," I snapped at him, flipping my hair and jotting down every important detail we needed to know about his elusive father. "If we play our cards right," I explained in a low tone, "I can get us on a flight first thing tomorrow morning."

"Legally?" He chuckled quietly, smirking.

"Of course not." I grinned, "But you know, you and I have sort of become experts in the whole breaking law thing, right?" He rolled his eyes and shook his head with a smile.

"We're not going as ourselves, correct?" He double checked.

"No, you'll be Masen as always, and I'll be Hannah." I responded without looking up, carefully writing down the accurate address and phone numbers given. I had to give it to Charlie – this program never lied. It worked with Aro, so I was confident that it would work with Carlisle as well.

"As my mom?" He groaned almost dubiously.

I thought about that for a moment. "Yeah, we might want to change that, huh?" I didn't even have to look up at him to know that he was swiftly nodding his head. "I'll be your wife then, because we don't exactly look related and it'll be easy to modify my current fake ID."

He nodded in approval as the room grew silent. A good minute passed before I realized it was time to face the parents. This would be quite an interesting conversation. I sighed, standing up and walking to the door, "Let's do this, bub," He followed me out the door with a wary expression. "Follow along, okay? It'll be fine." I muttered right before we entered the living room.

The two of them were casually lounging with popcorn in the living room. I sat down on the empty couch while Edward casually plopped down a good space away from me, not wanting to give them a bad impression.

"What do you two want?" Charlie accused with a half-smirk, "Edward, why on earth does Bella look so guilty? Bella, why on earth is Edward's face so _white_?" Renee chuckled at his questions.

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously, Dad? Stop. I came down here to ask something. And the only thing I'm guilty of is looking _hot_," I snapped my fingers and pursed my lips. Renee held her hand up for an air high five with a proud smile. Edward looked less than surprised, and Charlie shook his head while muttering something under his breath.

"What do you want then, oh your majesty?" Charlie addressed with a sour smile.

"Would it be okay if I went to Phoenix for part of break? With Edward? He hasn't visited his dad in years and he doesn't want to go alone. We would be staying at his father's place under his supervision. Besides," I finished casually, "You and mom should go somewhere alone. Somewhere warm. You hardly get to be together. I don't want to get in your way, but I don't want to just do _nothing_ either." It was always better to just be blunt and straightforward with Charlie.

They didn't look surprised at all. Quite the opposite, actually. It's like they had expected our conversation to go somewhere along those lines all along. Of course, they didn't exactly looked overly excited about the idea either.

"Edward?" Charlie turned to him with curiosity, "Is this true?"

Edward cleared his throat with a completely serious expression on his face. "No, sir, it's not. I was planning on taking your daughter on a road trip to Vegas where we would get hitched in a rented chapel and Bee would become a showgirl. Maybe if you're lucky, you'd even end up with some grandchildren too." He shrugged. I rolled my eyes, not amused.

Charlie knew better than to believe he was serious. He began shaking with laughter. "You, my boy, are gonna go far in life. Where have you been all of her life?" He shot his smug glance towards me. "I suppose if your dad is going to be with you two crazy kids, I can't object."

"Thank you, Charlie," Edward smiled politely. It didn't surprise me at how skilled he was with his lying abilities – Being him, I guess he'd have to be that good at it. What did surprise me though was how much Charlie took a liking to him. It was quite amazing, actually.

"Thanks, Daddy," I smiled happily. "We're leaving tomorrow morning." Only if I could lie just a little more to accomplish _that_ as well. His eyes widened a bit, silently questioning why we didn't just wait a few days. I shrugged. "I got good tickets."

"Well alright," He shrugged as well. "Best you both start packing then." I took this as our dismissal, grabbing a hold of Edward's hand as we hurried out of the room, holding in our enthusiasm all the way up until we were in my room with the door closed.

I led him to the bed, pushing him back and climbing on him. I laid myself on top of him, straddling his body with a leg on each side of his hips. I rested my forehead on his, leaning down just inches away from his face while running my fingers up and through his hair.

"You, Edward Cullen, are amazing," I whispered to him.

"You, Bella Swan, are going to be the death of me," he said in a low, suggestive tone as he began running his hands up and down my thighs. I dipped my head down to kiss him, wasting no time as I plunged my tongue into his mouth.

After we eventually got on task again from our few minutes of being hormonal teenagers, I called the airport. A lot of shameless phone flirting, bribery, begging, a shit loud of money, and a half hour later we had the tickets ready to be picked up when we arrived at the air port at six o'clock tomorrow morning.

I called Alice last night to give her a vague explanation of what was happening, assuring her that we'd explain everything when we returned and that this trip was absolutely mandatory. I also promised her a girl day in the near future, because sadly, I had been neglecting my best friend lately. She promised to pass on the news to the others, and Edward stayed over night once again. That was one thing I could definitely get used to.

Charlie and Renee had taken my advice about going some where warm, and their flight to Maui was three hours before ours, so they just decided to stay at one of those fancy airport hotels. It worked out perfectly because then I didn't need to put in such an effort to sneak Edward in that night. When it was just Laurent, things were perfectly fine.

We decided it was necessary to stop at Edward's before heading to the airport, because of the week-long stay we were taking. Along with running out of spare clothes for himself in the Volvo, he also needed his guy toiletries, because let's face it – he could borrow a lot of things, my feminine hygiene products _not_ being one of them.

I would be lying not to say I was excited. I was downright giddy, but glum at the same time. I could only imagine what impact of seeing his father for the first time would have on Edward. I was afraid that it would end up being one of those sad, hopeless weeks.

I was excited, because if things turned out going the way I wanted them to, we'd have a whole week of being a couple. A normal, carefree couple. No one would be following us to Arizona. I was confident of that. That particular thought brought optimism to me, keeping me awake during this god forsaken hour. Five thirty. As soon as we got on that damn plane, I was crashing in first class.

Appearing at the mouth of the alley where I was waiting for him, he had a large duffel bag slung over his shoulder. The sad thing was – I had four. I let him in and sped through the non-existing traffic towards the airport.

Edward carried his bag and two of mine as I retrieved the two remaining ones as we made our way inside the spacious place. I had given up making myself look pretty before even trying – it was going to be a three hour flight of sleeping; why bother even trying?

Instead I had thrown my hair up into an incredibly messy pony tail as my curly hair refused to do anything else. I had also been too lazy to put my contacts in so my glasses were on. Edward had borrowed me a pair of old, gray sweatpants which hung loosely around my waist as my feet remained warm and comfy in my Ugg boots.

I had groaned when I had seen myself in the mirror. Edward had kissed me while complimenting on how cute I looked. Yeah right. It was just the sweatpants, because for some reason, guys loved that whole 'girls wearing my clothes' shit.

I had everything we needed identification-wise in my over-sized coach purse, realizing as we walked towards our terminal that this was it was time.

I automatically did the sign of the cross, because we were about to lie so shamelessly that numerous laws were going to be broken. I glanced over at Edward. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised that he was smirking with anticipation. I knew there was a reason I loved him.

It took me a moment before I realized what had just happened. In a trance, I froze as the realization of the truth suddenly became clear in my mind with bursting intuition.

"You okay?" He asked softly as I stood there with wide eyes.

I nodded, staring back at him, wondering how in the world I had managed to fall in love with someone like Edward Cullen.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Shoot From The Hip - A Change Of Pace

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION:** _Aucun Regrettes _- "no regret"

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**Reviews keep Edward from being sad.  
So come on, have a heart and write one. (;**


	16. Merde

**First time with out an A/N.  
Go me.**

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**EPOV**

To think there had been a chance I'd never see that smile again. And she wondered why I was beating myself up about all of this.

Bella had one of those incredibly genuine smiles with a rare quality of calming reassurance in it; a smile you may only come across once or twice in your life. For a moment, it would face the perspective of the whole world before moving it's focus on you, concentrating on you with an irresistible comfort in your favor. It saw just as far as you wanted it to see, and left you with this subtle feeling of completeness inside, also giving you the impression and urge to want to be a better person. Someone worthy of such a smile.

I was trying though. She told me not to be sad, so I wasn't. Besides, how could I be sad when I was about to get to spend a week with her alone in some warm state? Not just a week though, a carefree week. A week we could actually try to attempt our status as a couple. She was my wife, after all.

My wife who regrettably didn't always like to follow rules. Disguising my obvious chuckles as a cough, I avoided making myself part of this amusing argument.

"Listen, dear," the irritated flight attendant snapped, "I don't care _who_ you are – you need to put the laptop away. Now." She had been booking hotels and whatnot because we hadn't had any time to do it before we left.

Bella narrowed her eyes, making my hidden smirk become even more profound than it already was. "Ma'am," she responded back in agitation. "I don't see what's the big deal here. I'm not bothering anyone, am I?" She pretended to sound innocent.

"Actually, you are." She glared with a pause before gesturing her hand at herself. "_Me_. Now I need you to put it away – we have a long flight ahead of us and we can't have Internet access interfering with the jet. Now please, before I have to remove it forcefully."

I could tell Bella was seriously considering this. I sighed, reaching over and taking the damn thing off her lap before closing it, placing it under my seat, and turning to give the attendant a curt smile. "She'll behave, she promises."

"To hell I wil–" I cut her off.

"She's sorry," I quickly offered, hoping she'd just leave and get off our backs already. With a polite nod to me and a cold glare to Bella, she walked off in obvious annoyance. I glanced at Bella who had her arms crossed and was slumping down unhappily in her seat.

"Bitch had it coming," she mumbled.

I chuckled. "It's early; you're tired. Go back to bed." Getting four hours of sleep the night before didn't exactly do wonders to a person's mood – especially not when that person was Bella.

She was about to protest before stopping herself and nodding in agreement. "You're right," she grumbled before a soft smile spread across her face as she began pushing the armrest between us up so that it was no longer in our way.

A male flight attendant noticed her fatigue and practically rushed over. I shouldn't have been surprised. This _was_ coach, after all. "Can I get you a pillow, Miss?" He asked politely with a smile.

"No," she declined while yawning with a sheepish smile. "I already have one."

He rose an eyebrow in confusion. Answering his question, she curled herself into my side, laying her head on my shoulder with a content sigh as I took that as my cue to wrap an arm around her. He nodded almost grimly, walking off to bug someone else.

It wasn't long at all until her breathing changed and I knew she was asleep. Instead of joining her, which I probably should have, I went through in my head the plan she had came up with.

After our arrival followed by checking into our hotel, we were setting off to find Carlisle. Or Anthony. Or whatever his name was. Before the 'no laptop order' had came into play, she had been doing some more background checking, and had informed me of a name change on his part.

I had wanted to wait a few days longer to jump right into all of this, but she insisted otherwise, claiming that I would end up just putting it off and stalling until the last minute. She was probably right, but was that really my fault?

To be honest, I didn't know what the hell to expect when I met him. I didn't know whether I should have been furious at him, confused with him, praising him, or something. All I did know was that I needed answers.

And since this was a sensitive subject with me, it was just a guess that voices would most likely be risen. Probably my voice, to be more particular. Regardless of whatever happened in the past that I didn't know about, I was mad at him. Mad because he couldn't have been in my life to prevent any of it from happening in the first place.

I was giving him the benefit of the doubt for now though, waiting to judge until I actually met him. Still though, he better have had a hell of a good reason for never making an appearance in my mother and I's life.

The truth was, I was just feeling shitty for everything lately. For lying to my family. For lying to Bella's family. For doing this to Bella in the first place. For not being able to do anything_ about _it in the first place. So generally just for being born.

Hell, Bella knew more about what she was doing than I did, and this wasn't even about her. Pretty fucking pathetic on my side, really. I'd make it up to her. In the next week, I'd find a way to make it up to her.

Because God knows what a mess I would be in; still living in the past, locked up in solitude from the world. It was hard to grasp the fact that had been my life just months ago. That had been it for me. Realizing that this small girl wrapped up in my arms had saved my life in more ways than one.

The ironic thing was, she didn't even realize it yet.

But damn it, I wasn't about to give up on my quest to save hers. I think the whole incident with the Volturi the other day made us each realize something. I don't think either of us really understood the concept of what we meant to each other before. It was clear now. Maybe not crystal, but a hell of a lot better than the muddy waters we had been seeing before.

We landed ahead of schedule and had retrieved our luggage with surprising speed. By the time we were pulling out of the parking lot in our rented Vanquish, it was just a little after noon.

Bella had booked us at the Radisson Hotel – you know, the really expensive and over-the-top kind of hotel that the celebrities stayed at. The only reason I didn't protest is because I knew that it was a lost battle before it even began.

Once upon a time, I had doubted Bella at many things. Humbleness, kindness, pleasantness, and even the ability to hold her own. That had been a short, short time. Because gone were the days I ever even considered questioning that girl anymore.

In some instances, it was nice – most of the time, she knew more about what I needed than I did myself. Other times, it was irritating as hell. But most of the time it was nice. On the bright side, it was hot _all _of the time. Assertiveness was a good look on her. Independence in general, really.

Our room was at one of the top floors of the building, which was like a billion and ten or something like that. Once I saw the room though, all complaints instantly vanished. It was a fucking palace. I think my jaw involuntarily dropped a little.

Bella smirked as she shut the door, "Too easy." She muttered to herself, already walking over to unpack her thousand bags.

My eyes wandered to the bed in the middle – A bed so big, it passed Bella's by twice the size. Which was absolutely ridiculous, because a few moments ago, I had been fairly positive that not a bed in the world could be bigger.

I had never been so happy to be wrong.

Then there was a huge-ass TV mounted on the wall, but that was really only to be expected. A mirror covered the whole south wall, and there were vast doors leading out to a private balcony. The room itself was designed as modern day classical and it had–

I stopped that thought before it could go any farther, realizing that I was critiquing a hotel room's interior design. Guess we knew who wore the pants in this relationship.

_Fuck_.

"So I was thinking," she began as she approached me, rubbing her hands up my chest with a devious smile. I groaned quietly, leaning down to kiss her before she pushed on my chest, moving herself away with a smirk. "Let's quick grab some lunch and we can get this over with?"

Still disoriented from her little fake-out, it took me a few moments before I nodded glumly. "Do we have to?" I almost whined. I wasn't looking forward to this. It just kept seeming like a worse and worse idea.

"Yes," she sang happily, skipping back over to take my hand and pull me out the door. "We do. And _after_ we do, we can do _other_ things." She teased, "You know? _Whatever_ we want."

I hope she knew that was the only thing I was looking forward to after all of this. In fact, I was counting on it.

What struck me as odd was how calm she appeared to be with all of this. I know it normally wasn't in her nature to show people how she was really feeling, so I had no clue what she _was_ really feeling. How the hell could she be so. . .okay with this? With the information I had, for all I knew this man could have been some crazy serial killer.

Maybe she was going about all of this the right way though. Maybe _I_ was the problem. Maybe I was making a big deal over nothing, and all of my nerves were completely unnecessary. Maybe.

I drove us to some semi-fancy sit down restaurant, secretly hoping to buy myself more time. No such luck. Turns out those 'semi-fancy' sit down restaurants actually work there asses off to satisfy their customers. Needless to say, we were walking out of those restaurant doors no more than forty-five minutes later.

"Now take the next left up there," she instructed, pointing towards the green arrow. I floored it as it turned yellow before I quickly had to turn again. "Turn there!" She quickly yelled, darting her finger to a less busy road.

I sighed, realizing that she probably should have driven. It probably wasn't the safest thing to do while you were just a bit on the edge and trust me, I was all the way to the very _end_ of the edge. I was practically bouncing in my seat.

"Okay, now slow down a little," she ordered. I obliged, looking around at the many streets signs surrounding us. "See that sign up ahead? Pattinson Road? Turn there," she told me.

I nodded, turning into a very suburban neighborhood. The kind where the parents with the four kids lived – having Sunday night steak-outs with friends and neighbors while their golden retriever ran happily in the fresh green grass. The families who had very decent jobs and drove the latest model of minivan to drive there kids to soccer practice.

The kind of neighborhood I never got to experience.

I drove slowly, waiting for my cue to turn at any moment. I glanced over at Bella who was studying house numbers carefully, silently counting in her head as we approached the right one.

"There!" she suddenly pointed.

Cautiously, I turned into the driveway of a white, two story home. It was hard to pick out anything distinct about it, other than the fact that it looked exactly like the rest of the houses in this God forsaken place.

All I knew was that if I ended up having some step-sibling, I was booking it out of that place before I'd even be able to meet the damn kid. Something told me I didn't though. According to Bella, my parents never divorced and my father never remarried.

I turned off the ignition as we both sat there in silence for a good minute. "You ready?" She finally asked softly.

"Not one bit." I responded without missing a beat. "Let's go."

I grabbed on tightly to her hand as we walked up the front steps. She reached out with two loud knocks on the door. Moments later footsteps sounded faintly from the other side, and I took a deep breath and held it in. Bella squeezed my hand even tighter.

I let out a sharp intake of breath once the stranger on the other side of the door was revealed. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Bella's jaw drop. Staring at the man who was half the reason I was here on this earth, all I could manage was a shocked, shaky whisper. "Carlisle?"

We stared at each other for a long moment. I wasn't sure what he saw in me, other than the fact that it was like looking into mirror of youth. Bella remained completely silent and still at my side, bewildered by the face we both shared.

With awe in his eyes, he took a step forward. "Edward?" He whispered, keeping his green eyes locked with mine, "Edward _Cullen_?" I gulped, nodding slowly. "My god," he muttered under his breath. "You must be my son."

I nodded once again, unable to speak. Unable to believe that this was actually happening. That this moment I had deemed impossible many times was actually here.

After what seemed like hours of frozen silence between the three of us, Bella finally spoke up. "Well, Mr. Cullen," she said in a tone that just naturally relieved tension, "I don't know about you, but I think it would be a good idea if we all went inside now, don't you think?"

Eyes still wide with shock and bewilderment, he nodded, turning away from us to lead her and I inside.

**Bella**

I sat down on a soft white couch, gesturing with my eyes for Edward to join me. I figured it'd be far more of a comfortable, at ease environment if we were all sitting and relaxed. He complied to my silent request, automatically reaching for my hand. I held it tightly in both of mine as his father stood before us, beginning a slight pace.

The silence was heavy as minutes passed where no one said anything at all. Finally, Carlisle sighed. "I don't even know what to say right now," he whispered, shaking his head while raking a hand through his hair, just like Edward always did.

The moment he had opened the door for us, I knew we were at the right place. The similarities in features between the two were impossible to miss. Same structure in jaw, cheekbone. Same placement in eyes, nose, and even mouth. Exact same bright green eyes. The only thing Edward had on Carlisle was youth. Though Carlisle couldn't have been over forty it appeared.

Edward let out a quiet snort. "You're telling me," he crossed his arms, staring at the ground as he remained rigid beside me. I could only imagine what was going on in that boy's head right now, and how overwhelming his thoughts must have been.

Carlisle had numerous emotions mixed across his face. The main one was confusion. He was confused at a lot of things at the moment – who I was, how Edward was alive, how we had found him. Understandable questions. Then there was the obvious shock from our arrival. Then, there was sadness. The sadness I wasn't really sure on, but I had some pretty good guesses that it was for more reasons than one.

He sighed again before finally plopping himself down exhaustedly in the chair across the room from us. It wasn't an overly large room, so we were still fairly close. "I have two questions first before we start in on anything," he said softly.

Edward kept his head down, moving his eyes up to cause a crease in his forehead. "Okay, go." He ordered calmly.

"First question," he began seriously, "How in God's name are you alive right now?" Huh. Maybe he knew more than I thought he did about all of this. "And second," he paused as a curious expression crossed his face. "How the _hell_ did you find me?"

Edward remained emotionless without a single expression crossing his face. He had gotten really good at that particular tactic over the years, I had learned. "How about introductions first?" He stated almost curtly.

"Very well," Carlisle nodded. "My real name is Carlisle Cullen, as you already know. For reasons you will find out shortly, I had it changed to Anthony Masen." He told mainly Edward, vaguely aware that I was even a part of this bizarre meeting.

Edward let out a single humorless chuckle. "What a coincidence," he shook his head a little, "Masen Collins. This is my wife," he cracked a small smile. "Hannah Collins." I allowed myself a small smirk.

Carlisle rose his eyebrows before knitting them together and nodding. "I see." He exclaimed with a knowing look. As I studied his face a little more, I could see it in his eyes that he knew exactly what this little meeting was about. He knew what we wanted.

"This is Bella Swan," Edward responded a few moments later in hesitance. "She's my. . .girlfriend." The teenage girl inside of me did an involuntary back flip at the use of the term. We hadn't really had a name for what we were up until now.

Letting him know that I was completely content with the word, I sent his father a warm smile. "It's very nice to meet you, Mr. Cullen."

My smile appeared to me infectious. He smiled back with pleasure. "Call me Carlisle," he grinned. I hoped my subtle attempts at easing the mood in the atmosphere were working. "Swan. Hm, that name rings a bit of a bell. . .Is your father Charlie?"

I glanced at Edward before I answered who was silent next to me, thoughtful as to how he was going to answer the two questions Carlisle already had given him. Before I could answer mine, Edward answered for me. "How do you know him?"

"When I was in Chicago I worked with him a couple of times," he answered.

"So you know what he does for a living?" Edward asked, sending him a skeptical look. Carlisle nodded in confirmation. "Well there's the answer to your first question then."

He seemed to accept that for now. The fact of the matter was that so much had to be said within the next conversation that none of us really knew where to start. Well, neither of them, that was. I didn't exactly have a role in any of this.

"He knows you're here then? I mean, I assume you know him, yes?"

Edward shook his head and shrugged at the same time. "He knows we're here. He has no clue as to who I really am, or as to who you are. How do _you_ know him?"

"I believe that question will make more sense once we get into the real reason you're here. Besides, you still haven't answered my other original question. How are you alive right now?"

"What do you mean?"

Before I knew it, our information suddenly began flowing freely from this man's lips. "After your mother's funeral, I came looking for you. I knew you had no possible blood relatives other than me, and that you were under age to be living by yourself. When I went to the government, it was reported that you were dead."

Edward took a deep breath, realizing that his one-worded answers would no longer be enough. "I didn't want to live with some stranger I'd never met before. I wanted to be alone. After everything that happened, you have to understand that."

Carlisle nodded grimly. "How did you manage to 'kill' yourself then?"

He became hesitant again as to whether or not he should share that particular part of his past. "I drove my car into the Illinois River and then hid myself for a while. People had seen me go in with the car so after days of searching for my body, it went on record that I had just drowned in the river."

"Ah," he responded simply in what seemed like almost fascination at the same time. "I see."

"I didn't come here to play tea-party though," he suddenly stated flatly, "I need answers."

"Yes, I figured that's why you're here. Before I began though, why don't you tell me everything first. Just so I know what you already know and what you don't know."

He seemed to think this was a fair trade. Story for story. For some reason, I felt it necessary to grip his hand just a little tighter. "When I was twelve, mom and I went to live in Paris for a while. I'm not sure why, she never told me. The only thing relevant that had gone on before we left was the death of my aunt. You know? Jane Volturi. That's not important though," he quickly continued.

"Yes it is," his dad muttered softly. Edward snapped his eyes towards Carlisle's. He just shook his head. "Finish your story and I'll start mine."

"So we lived in Paris for a good two and a half years and eventually Esme thought it'd be a good idea to return. We eventually did, and everything from that point on gets really vague and blurry in my mind."

"Understandable," Carlisle nodded with a hint of remorse, "Go on with everything you can remember."

"It had been a few nights after we got back to the country. . ." he paused in thought. The strain in his voice to keep himself sounding indifferent did not go unnoticed by me. "Esme had said we were invited over to a welcome home dinner at Alec's. . ." he trailed off. I hadn't realized he had been whispering until I glanced up to see the sharp pain hidden deep within the walls of his eyes.

Oddly enough, Carlisle noticed it to. "That was the night, wasn't it?" He mused softly.

Edward nodded solemnly, keeping his head ducked.

"You both went over there, it started out fine until before you know it, Alec sort of went crazy, am I right?" Edward nodded in bewilderment. Clearly it was news to him that his father knew anything about that particular night. He lowered his tone, "He ended up killing her, and you ran. You told the police what had happened, and Alec ended up sentenced for life."

"How do you know all of this?" Edward whispered in shock.

"Because, Edward," Carlisle sighed, "I got the call telling me my wife was murdered. I was at the trial. And most importantly, I looked for you afterwards but you were no where to be found."

Edward picked up where his father had left off. "If you were at the trial, why didn't I see you?" He countered, narrowing his eyes slightly.

"You probably did see me," he responded quietly. "But I didn't want you to know who I was. Not then. Your well-being wasn't anywhere near being stable, and I knew that if I were to tell you who I was, you would be too overwhelmed for your own good. After all you had just went through, I decided to wait. But, I never got the chance after that, and to this day I regret my decisions."

Edward thought about this for a moment. I remained silent next to him, taking in all this new, frighteningly sad information I hadn't known before we came. I felt as if I should say something, but what?

"I answered your questions," Edward stated harshly, "Now answer mine. Why were you never a part of my life?" I knew this question was the one that caused him to stay awake every night, going over the possible answers.

Carlisle pinched the bridge between his nose, hanging his head before sighing and looking back at him. "It was a mixture of bad judgment on your mom and I's part, safety, and my job. Mostly my job though." He paused, glancing at me for the first time this conversation. "Like Bella's dad, I work for the government – instead of one state, I worked all over the whole country. There's not really a technical name for what I was, but you could have called me a private investigator; maybe even a secret agent, if you will. I was like Charlie in a way, only my job had to be incredibly more conspicious than his. My main point is, my job was dangerous."

"I worked on many of the top murder cases, homicides, bank robberies. You name it, I did it. I saved as many lives as I could, I protected as many cities as I could, and I paid every dept to society possible."

"I still don't get it," Edward shook his head, "Why you couldn't have even made a short _cameo_ in my life."

"Alongside of the fact that your mother and I wanted to keep you away from being a possible target, we also decided that it would be better for you to never know me at all than to have to cope with only seeing me once or twice a year. After all, you can't miss something you've never had."

"Being a target? Why would I have been a target?" He asked dubiously, making it sound as if the whole story was some made-up hoax. Mesmerized by what I was hearing, I sat in a trance at what a small world this really was.

"The cases I worked on – The people we were after to arrest," he explained, "They bargained with anything they could. If they knew you were alive, they would have somehow found a way to use you as a ransom. I know it."

He seemed to accept this, nodding and gesturing with his eyes for his father to go on.

"At the time, I knew I couldn't take that risk, as much as it killed me to pull myself away from my first and only son. I know it was probably a mistake – never taking the chance to let my son meet his own father, but at the time, I truly believed it was for your own good." Carlisle ran his hand through his hair, stressed. "It's my biggest regret."

I decided that Edward needed a moment to take this all in. Saving him, I quickly interceded, "You know my dad?" I asked him curiously, bringing up the topic once again.

"Oh sure," he responded lightly, "We worked together a couple of times when I was located in Chicago. We had spent a good month rounding up members from the Russian mafia hidden within the state. Good, good man." He finished with a smile.

"Yeah," I grinned, "He is."

Edward adjusted more comfortably in his seat, finally leaning back. He released his hand from mine, moving an arm casually around my shoulder as I also made myself more comfortable. "So tell me," he began in a skeptical voice, "What do _you_ have to do with the Volturi?"

"The Volturi? Why do you bring them up?" He asked, raising an eyebrow in confusion.

There was an audible snap from Edward gritting his teeth together. I could tell that his calm mood had quickly vanished and was replaced by frustration that his father had not an ounce of knowledge at the fact that an insane vendetta was currently plagued on his son.

"Why do I bring them up?" He rose his voice with a hint of hysteria in it as he let out a hallow chuckle. "They're the reason I fucking came here, Carlisle," he spat. "Because for some reason, you play a part in their crazy death games."

Carlisle was completely lost. His face was shocked and he sat there, stunned into silence. It was obvious that he had no clue as to what had been going on in Edward's life for the passed few years.

"For reasons I _don't know_, they've been trying to kill me for the passed three years. I always thought it was because I put Alec in jail, but apparently there's more to the story that I'm not familiar with. You know his sons? Aro, Caius, and Marcus? Well they want me dead." He took a deep, shaky breath. "And while being chained to some wall as they were about to kill me, _you_ were brought into the conversation. They said they were getting revenge for what _you_ did."

I scooted myself closer to him, resting my hand on his leg and rubbing it to soothe him into a calmer state. I didn't want his anger to make him do or say something that he would regret and beat himself up about later.

Carlisle placed his elbows on his knees, dropping his face down to bury in his hands. "I had no idea," he muttered, shaking his head. "_My god_," he whispered painfully, "I should have known."

"You think?" Edward hissed angrily.

He rose his head with a strained expression. "I always thought it was me. I knew after Jane's death, they'd be after me. It was just the way they were. So by changing my name, quitting my job, and moving away, I thought I was doing right. I never factored you into the equation once because you were suppose to be _dead_."

"You know what?" he gritted through his teeth. "Save it. I get the whole 'it would be risking your life for me to be around you thing' you did to me as a child, but join the fucking club. Don't think I don't feel the exact same way with Bella. With _anyone_. It's there goal in life, Carlisle. To inflict pain on me and eventually finish me off, and I can't let myself place that fate on other people as well. If you have any idea of why they're doing this – of why they want me dead _so_ badly, then please," he begged, "Just tell me."

"If I would have had any idea this was happening. . ." he muttered, trailing off and shaking his head some more. With a grim expression on his face, he looked up to meet the eyes of Edward. "I know why." He confirmed.

"One night, I got an emergency phone call. It was for a very serious bank robbery, which eventually led to a high speed gun chase." He paused, recalling the memory. "Jane Volturi, Alec's wife, was working at that bank that night. Our first task had been to get every innocent citizen out of there safely, since there were at least ten different gun men."

No longer looking at either of us, he stared absentmindedly out the window. "Knowing who she was, I made her my first priority to get to safety. In the back of a cop car was the safest place to be, so that's where I had her go." He gulped, "Another huge mistake on my part. As soon as everyone was evacuated, we began the chase. She had refused to leave my sight, having no other option than to just ride along."

He took a deep, strained breath. "There were a lot of gunshots and after one thing led to another, half my car was totaled." He glanced at Edward. "You can probably guess which half was destroyed."

"Jane's," I whispered, suddenly understanding the whole story.

He nodded, turning back to Edward. "One of the escaping robbers ran straight into me at an intersection. The back half of my car was completely smashed, killing your aunt instantly."

Peaking up at Edward, I noticed recognition cross his face as the understandment set in. "That's what they meant," he murmured under his breath. "They said you murdered her, and that I took away their father–"

"They're arrogant, Edward." he went on to finish Edward's statement. "That's all they are – They strive to be right in their minds, power hungry as always. You know them better than I do. You can see where all of this may come in as a problem."

"Problem?" Edward suddenly scoffed loudly. "_Problem_? No, it was a _problem_ when their sick asses killed my mom for some twisted revenge. _That_ was a _problem_. The fact that they have yet to let all of this shit go – that's just insane, crazed madness."

All Carlisle could do was nod in agreement.

I, on the other hand, was at a loss for words. Never in my life had I ever heard of something so _stupid_. How utterly ridiculous all of this was. I let out a harsh laugh, "That's why?" I asked in disbelief, "So let me get this straight if I am correct. After the accidental death of their mother, you and your mom left the country because Carlisle already knew how dangerous Alec could be and pretentious he was about taking things the wrong way, and warned Esme that disappearing for a while would be a good idea."

Edward's eyes were spacious and distant as he too tried to piece together this confusing puzzle. He turned to Carlisle with a questioning gaze. Carlisle nodded, "That's correct."

"Then, once you both returned," I continued to Edward, "They had some sort of 'welcome back' party, right? Because they had created the impression that there had been this whole change of heart over what had happened. Ultimately though, it ended up becoming a set up, which in the end, killed your mother."

I was surprised at how much of this I was actually getting. On a role, I decided to continue. "So you turned in your uncle, proving him to be guilty and throwing him in jail. On top of still being angry over Jane's death, they also became furious of their dad's arrest. Discovering that _you_ were really the only problem left to fix in theit whole equation, they decided that your life was the one needed to be forfeited."

Before either of them could say a word, I wrapped up my conclusion. "At first it had been about some sort of messed up revenge, but after a while it turned into some messed up game, correct?"

His dad stared at me in disbelief as Edward's look told me he was less than surprised that I had manged to solve what we had been looking for all along. "You're definitely your daddy's girl," Carlisle shook his head.

I beamed a little at his comment before adjusting my position so that I was facing Edward completely. "That's why," I whispered, only audible for Edward, "That's why they killed your mom."

He nodded, "I get it now." He said quietly, "I don't like it, but I get it." Turning back to his father, he pursed his lips with a hard look on his face. "So where exactly do _you_ fit into all of this. Why did you run? Wasn't it your 'job' to protect innocent citizens. Like, I dunno, _me_?"

"Edward, if I had any idea. . ."

"I _know_." He stated cutting him off, "I _get_ that. But why couldn't you have fixed it? No, not even that. Why couldn't you have at least had the decency to protect me and mom?" His voice began to raise.

Carlisle sat there with a thoughtful expression. Not thoughtful, just answer-less. He didn't know how to respond to Edward's harsh questions, though I somehow did. It was written all over his face; something Edward failed to see.

Much like Edward, it was obvious that he blamed himself for uncontrollable things. So when Jane was killed, he took it upon himself to bear the burden of her death, thus quitting his job, feeling like he had failed.

But all Edward could see in his expression was a blank face.

I knew it would happen eventually and that it was only a matter of time before he snapped like a twig. Suddenly, he was on his feet and storming out of the room silently in a mixture of frustration and anger.

Carlisle buried his face in his hands once again as he muttered something quietly to himself. "I'm sorry," I shot him apologetically, "He's like this a lot. After all he's been through, it's easy for him to be crushed. Don't take it personally."

"I have to," he sighed, shaking his head. "Because it's my fault."

I didn't have anything to respond to that with, so I quickly excused myself from the room and went to find Edward so that we could finish our conversation the right way. If he left now, I knew there were things he would regret.

Going by the sound I had heard from the front door earlier, I assumed that's where he had went and stepped outside. Just as I expected to see him, he was sitting in the Vanquish waiting for me.

His head was down and he didn't see me as I approached. I walked up and leaned down to his door, tapping lightly on the window for him to open it. He didn't look surprised that I was there and quickly slid the window down for me.

Placing my arms on the open window, I rested my chin on them as I stared at him with a calm expression. "Please come back inside?" I asked softly.

He kept his glare directed towards the windshield in front of him. "Why should I?" He snapped angrily before proceeding to slam his fists down violently on the dashboard. "Merde!" he grumbled in frustration. I could only guess it was some sort of profanity.

"Because," I responded. "You know he had more to say to you and you're not giving him a chance. Put yourself in his position and think about just how overwhelming all of this must be for him too. Edward, he didn't know any better and he's genuinely sorry. I can tell."

He remained silent before sighing. "Why do you always have to be right?"

I smiled, biting my lip before leaning my head inside the car and reaching for him. "Come here," I whispered, pulling his face gently to mine. I pressed my lips to his, sucking softly as I lightly stroked his hair.

I realized that knowing how much I loved him changed so many things. It changed the way I looked at him, the way I kissed him; everything. All in extremely good ways. I had never been in love before, so the fact that I was treading water in uncharted territories had me scared for the first time in my life.

As always though, I never allowed him to see my fear. It was mandatory for me always to appear strong, even when I wasn't. I had to brave that shit because if I didn't, who else would?

I pulled away smiling. "Come on, let's go back inside. You've got eighteen years you need to catch up on."

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Broken - Lifehouse

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Merde - _"shit"

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**Reviews are like my own, shiny Vanquish.**


	17. Je T'aime

**I'm back! And late.**  
**But I'm still back!**  
**Sorry 'bout that, by the way.**  
**My computer's just a hoe.**  
**ANYWAYS.**

**450 reviews? Gah, I'm spoiled.**  
**I feel like you guys can do anything.**  
**I think we should test it out.**  
***dramatic drum roll***  
**Can we do 500?**  
**I think so.**  
**Let's do it, babes.**

**--Justine(:**

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**Bella - Je T'aime**

By the time we left Carlisle's house the sun was just beginning to set. He had ended up inviting us to stay for dinner – an offer I urged Edward to let us accept. I would be lying if I said it wasn't awkward. It was. Then again, anything would be awkward in the situation we were in.

Edward had seemingly forgiven his father for everything, realizing that no one was at fault here but the Volturi. Even though it wasn't much, I could tell he was happy to have gotten his answers.

After we had went back into the house, many more things were discovered. Like the fact that Carlisle had retired from his job shortly after the incident with Jane, only because he couldn't handle the knowledge that the death of someone was his fault. Just like I had predicted earlier.

That guilt only piled up once Esme was also murdered. Thus ending with the final confirmation that Edward was in fact alive, and _also_ being hunted. It wasn't a good day for him, I could tell that much.

He refused to let us leave until Edward accepted a great deal of money from him. Of course, Edward flat out rejected the gesture, informing him that it was a waste of money to invest on a son he never knew. I ended up winning that argument for Carlisle and in the end, Edward walked out of that door ten-thousand dollars richer.

The ride home had been heavy with silence. I didn't talk at first because I wanted him to have time to recap the day's events. A lot had been discovered after all, so it was only fair that he was able to have the opportunity to grasp it all.

He surprised me by starting a conversation about the rest of the week. Everything had been going swimming at first. We were talking about what we were going to do one moment, and the next thing I knew we were yelling and I was slamming the car door shut and storming up to our room.

"I cannot believe you!" I muttered angrily under my breath as I headed straight for the elevator.

The whole ride up to the top floor was long and painful as each of us silently fumed. I was furious at what he had said. He was mad because he was convinced he was right.

In a haste, I slid the key in and opened the door. I threw my keys and purse on the floor, sliding off my shoes before I walked all the way to the opposite side of the room in anger. I couldn't be close to him right now.

He mumbled something under his breath that I didn't catch and looked at me in irritation as he stood just in front of the doorway.

I stared at him from across the room with my mouth open in disbelief and frustration. "You don't think I'm scared?" I raised my voice, hurt by his accusation.

His eyes were narrowed as he shook his head sharply at me. "No," he stated loudly, "I don't think you're scared at all." His eyes showed no signs of regret as he continued to glare at me.

I couldn't stop the angry tears that were forming in my eyes. "Well I am!" I shouted, suddenly storming over in his direction. I shoved my hands against his chest, pushing him at the wall as I no longer had control over my emotions.

In my anger, I was battered by what his cold glare did to me and my tears suddenly became uncontrollable. "I'm not fucking invincible!" I shouted at him, giving him another hard push as he stared at me in both bewilderment and anger as I finally allowed myself to cry.

"Well it sure seems like you are, Bee!" He countered angrily, trying to stop my hands from shoving against his chest. "Sorry, but it just doesn't seem like you take all of this real seriously!" It was the first time either of us had risen our voice to the other.

I growled in frustration as I gave him one last shove and walked back across the room, facing away from him. I wiped furiously at the moisture on my face but it refused to stop. "You think I'm not scared of anything? I am." I let out a bitter laugh.

He let out a loud, humorless chuckle. "I really doubt that. You have your own perfect little world where the only thing that you're scared of is your curling iron breaking in the morning."

That had just gone way too far. Why was he being so mean? All I was ever trying to do was help. His words had cut into me though, leaving me breathless and damaged by his harsh statement, causing me to really start to cry. Hard.

How ironic was it that my first time ever crying in front of him was because of him.

I turned around to face him, blinking away the blurriness so that I could see his face clearly. I wondered if he realized how badly of a blow that had been. "You have no idea," I rasped in low voice, shaking my head.

Not being able to take it anymore, I walked out of the room and onto the balcony. Minutes later, as I finally let my tears fall freely, I heard him quietly approach me and without looking I could tell that he was standing a few steps behind me. I took a deep, shaky breath.

"The first time I met you guys, I was afraid I wouldn't be accepted," My voice cracked as I rubbed my nose and stared out at the dim sky, "When you told me about the Volturi, I couldn't sleep for a week. When I read the letters you wrote to your mom, I went home and cried myself to sleep. Every time I'm away from you, I'm terrified to be alone. There's never a moment when I'm not worrying about you. I'm so scared that something will happen." I whispered, crossing my arms as I heard his quiet breathing behind me. "I'm scared that something will tear us apart and we won't be able to be together. You think I'm never afraid? Well I'm terrified. Always."

I was mad at him. Mad that he was so easily able to accuse me of being an emotionless, cold-hearted bitch. I thought of all people, he was the one who got me the best. Then, it suddenly it me. I realized that he wasn't the problem. _I _was the problem.

My crying suddenly thickened and became uncontrollable. "I'm sorry if I'm a bitch," I got out between gasps, "It's just who I am – I can't help it sometimes –" I sniffed loudly, wiping my eyes once again. "I always think I'm doing the right thing but I never am. I'm sorry, just. . .just don't give up on me, please I can, I can–"

"Shhhhh," he quickly cut me off. His strong arms wrapped themselves tightly around me from behind as he pulled me firmly against his chest, ducking down and resting his chin on my shoulder.

Embarrassed by how foolishly I had let my emotions rule me, I shook my head and blinked my eyes rapidly, trying to rid away my sadness. "I'm sorry," I breathed as I let one last tear spill. "I just–"

"I said _shhhhhhh_," he repeated in a soft, gentle voice. It made me feel better. It made me realize how ridiculous this whole fight had really been.

"I want you to listen to me," he whispered into my ear. "It's been a long day. I've been nothing but an ass to you this whole time, and I'm incredibly sorry for that. A lot's been on my mind and I guess I just snapped. Let's just forget about all of this and sleep it off."

I bit my lip, nodding and turning to face him as we each stared at each other with apologetic eyes. "Three more things," he quickly added after a few moments, wiping the last bit of moisture from my red, tear-stained face with the stroke of his thumb. "First, you have to forget every word I said to you before. You know I didn't mean any of it and _don't you dare_ blame yourself." I grimaced a little but nodded. "Second, it breaks my heart when you cry. Never do it. Again. And if I'm the one who's making you sad, kick me in the balls instead, please." I smirked a little before his eyes became serious. "And lastly, you don't always have to be brave." He whispered as his hot breath blew on my neck.

I nodded, shutting my eyes. "I have to be bulletproof," I whispered, "Because if I'm not, I will break. I can't appear strong to myself if I don't think others see me as fearless. If I let myself feel every emotion I've ever had, Edward," I told him, "I would be broken."

It took a while, but eventually we moved back inside the room. After a long month of painful stress and finally letting it all out in one night, it was nice to just take a few moments to appreciate the feeling of wholeness with his arms securely around me.

The feeling didn't go away as his arms remained that way the whole night. For the first time in a long time, I slept worry free.

**Edward**

I was mad. Mad at myself, mad at my life, mad at everyone _but_ Bella. And who did I decide to take my anger out on? Bella. I decided to release my terrible rampage on the one person who had only been trying to help me all this time.

The truth was, I had just been a ticking time bomb lately. It was only appropriate that I would eventually blow. It was only to be expected when one's piled with that much stress and pressure in a short amount of time.

I had been a time bomb, and Bella had been a nervous wreck. We just snapped. It was as simple as that. It wouldn't have been a big deal had I not made her cry.

Bella never cried. Never. At least, not in front of anyone that is. So for _me_ to make her cry, I had to have hit her pretty hard with my word vomit. I don't know why I said those things to her. I guess I was just mad at all of this and needed someone to blame.

When really, no one was at fault here. Everything that had happened in my life was just one, big misunderstanding. The past was the past though, and nothing could change what _had_ happened.

So from that moment on, I was done sulking. Done making myself suffer for no reason. Not only had I been blind to the fact that my self-disgust had been hurting not only me, but I had also failed to see that I wasn't alone with all of this.

I felt oddly relieved for once. And not just because my arms were wrapped around my whole world, but because I finally realized that from now on, I'd try to see the world as Bella did.

She didn't hesitate to do something. She didn't hold onto unchangeable things. And most importantly, she took whatever life gave her. That's how I wanted to be. Not only would I be ten times more happy with my life, but I'd also be able to go about things the right way.

In a way, the fight we had had been a good thing. I figured out three extremely important things after it was all said and done.

Three things I was absolutely positive about. First, happiness didn't always have to be fleeting. Second, there was a time in your life, and I didn't know when exactly that was, that made you realize going through hardships only made relationships stronger. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with her.

I suppose I had known this for a while now and maybe just didn't want to give in to it. When I thought about it; when I _really_ thought about the concept of loving someone with my whole heart, it was a scary thing.

Not only was I more vulnerable than ever in my state of adoration, but I was also walking on a tight rope. It was such a difficult path to take being in the situation we were in. In fact, I never should have fallen for her in the first place.

That didn't change a thing though. I loved Bella Swan.

Did she feel the same way? Probably not. When was the right time to tell her this newly found information? No idea. I'd roll with it though, because as she had promised, the rest of the week would be purely 'us' time.

For the first time in nights, I slept with a solid smile on my face.

I woke up long before Bella did the next morning. Knowing her and also factoring last night, I figured twelve would be the earliest she'd be up. After lying with her for a while and just enjoying the feeling of having her with me, I decided to shower and get ready for the day. Well, get ready for the afternoon, I suppose.

After I was clean and dressed, I walked down to order myself some breakfast at the hotel's built in restaurant. Overwhelmed by my sudden wealth, I splurged and bought myself a three course breakfast. I didn't even know places _offered_ shit like that.

I hadn't eaten any good food in so long though, so I could hardly feel like a fat-ass for it. When I got back up to the room at ten-thirty she was still sound asleep.

Never really having the freedom to do much ever, I was at a loss as to what exactly I _was_ suppose to do with myself. I decided getting Bella breakfast as well would be a good time filler and for the second time that morning was back down to the diner.

I had to admit, it felt odd having nothing to worry about for once. I mean, I was generally a paranoid person and deservingly so. Not having to be paranoid kinda paranoid me. Ironic how things were sometimes.

When I walked back into the room at eleven, she was surprisingly just waking up. "Morning Sleeping Beauty," I smirked. "Why don't you just look lovely on this fine day." Holding her breakfast in both my hands, I walked over beside the bed, leaning down for a quick kiss before placing her food on the counter.

"Damn." she muttered, rubbing her eyes as she sat up and stretched. "I thought for sure I'd wake up before you this time but you always beat me."

"I brought you breakfast," I grinned, gesturing towards the table, waiting for her approval.

"Well aren't you just a sweetheart then," she yawned, bringing her hands over her head before rolling out of bed. She stumbled over to the table where I was now unpacking her food. I couldn't help but go a little overboard when I bought her meal as well. Oh well. I guess it was closer to lunch than breakfast anyways.

She stood on her tip-toes, leaning up to give me another good morning kiss. I could _definitely_ get used to that.

Her eyes got wide as she stared at all of the food I had set out. "I have this horrible feeling I'm going to leave this state with an extra ten pounds. Are you trying to make me a fatty?"

I poked at her non-existing stomach, pursing my lips as I grimaced in fake horror. "I decided that since you've already been letting yourself go lately, there was no harm. . ." She had the most perfectly proportioned body I had ever seen. Sarcasm was almost hard with this one.

"Douche!" She playfully smacked me across the arm. "You know what? I'm going to quick take a shower." She turned away, disappearing into the bathroom. "Then I'll sit on my ass and eat my feelings all day!" She yelled loudly after closing the door.

I smiled to myself, shaking my head before walking over and plopping myself down on the couch, turning on the over-sized TV. Then again, there was no such thing as an 'over-sized' TV. Twenty minutes later she appeared from out of the bathroom.

I wanted to scream.

I wanted to moan.

But most importantly, I wanted to fuck the ever loving shit out of her.

She proceeded to walk into the room without a glance in my direction, sitting down casually at the counter with a permanent smirk residing on her lips. I stared at her, open mouthed with wide eyes as I took in her outfit. If you could even call it that.

She had on black lingerie. _If you could even call it that_. She was a sight of lacy, amazing goodness with her skimpy little thong and her tiny, tight, push-up bra that gave cleavage a new meaning of the word.

She turned to me with an innocent expression as she daintily pursed her lips. "Something wrong, Edward?" She asked sweetly.

"Yes, Bella." I gritted through my teeth. "Something _is_ wrong."

She quickly narrowed her eyes. "Payback, my dear friend, is a bitch." I groaned loudly, covering my hands over my eyes, unable to bear the sight before me. "It gets better," she sang happily, "Not only will you have to deal with looking at my fat tummy the rest of the day, you also won't be able to lay a single hand on me."

"You're a fucking twig," I told her with all honesty. "Now stop being ridiculous, you know that's not going to happen."

She held up a finger, "No touchy," she repeated cheerfully.

I narrowed my eyes at her, slowly getting off the couch and approaching her. She glared at me as I held a hand out, inching closer and closer to her bare skin. "I said you can't touch me," she reminded me sternly. "And I meant it."

"Well I said that's not going to happen," I snapped back. "And I meant it."

I took another step towards her. She reached for her glass of orange juice, raising a menacing eyebrow as she silently threatened me. "You wouldn't." I challenged.

She gave me a sweet, deadly smile. "Try me."

The second I darted my hand forward, touching the flesh of her bare collarbone, my whole shirt was soaking wet with sticky, wet orange juice. My jaw popped open as she began giggling at my shocked expression. I quickly stripped off the soaked shirt, tossing it across the kitchen and into the sink. She just kept laughing.

"Bella Swan," I stated, slowly shaking my head, "You might have just made the biggest mistake of your life."

She crossed her arms, purposely illustrating her glorious tits. My gaze fell upon them before I quickly snapped my eyes back up, meeting her smirking face. "Oh did I now?"

I nodded, reaching my hand behind her for the syrup bottle. Just like she said – payback was a bitch. Her mouth formed a large 'o' as she stared at the bottle in my hands. We kept our eyes locked together as I emphasized myself removing the cap.

"Edward Anthony, so help me God if you so much as get a single drop of that on me I will–"

She was cornered, and she knew it. "You'll what, sweetheart?"

She sprung herself off her stool, trying to dart around me. Fortunately, I easily caught her with one of my arms before she could escape. She squealed loudly as I restrained her from running, pinning her against me.

With a large, victorious smile I slowly began tilting the bottle. I laughed loudly as she desperately struggled against me, screaming loud death threats at the top of her lungs.

Syrup began pouring out of the container, falling onto the whole front side of her body. She squealed as soon as it made contact with her skin, still thrashing against me. As soon as I was sure we were even, I released her.

I watched in amusement as she took a few steps away from me, staring down at her sticky body with a look of both horror and disgust. And anger. Her eyes snapped up to mine with the most menacing look I think I had ever seen from her. I couldn't help but to chuckle once again.

Her eyes narrowed. "I don't see what you're laughing at," she hissed. "You think this is funny? Well then you'll think this is just _hilarious_." In one quick movement she leaped at me, throwing herself at my chest as she placed her hands on my shoulders and jumped up, hoisting herself into my arms while wrapping her legs tightly around my waist.

She clung on to me like a leech as I tried pushing her off me. It was no use though. Because no matter how hard I spun her around in circles, there was no way she was letting me come out of this without an equal amount of syrup on my body as well.

She was quite successful with her whole tactic, actually. The fact that I currently wasn't wearing a shirt and she really wasn't either made it extremely easy for the whole 'syrup-transfer' to take place. Not only was it wet and sticky, but it was also _incredibly_ hot.

Of course, that was only to be expected when dealing with food and lingerie.

With her still refusing to let go, I ran over to the counter once again, retrieving the can of whipped cream. As soon as she saw it, she leaped out of my arms and was already making her way across the room in a flash. I ran after her as we both left a trail of syrup everywhere we went.

Let's just say, we would be needing to call down more than a couple of room cleaners to deal with our mess. I could hardly care at the moment.

I eventually caught her, pinned her down to the couch and sat hovering over the top of her. She shielded her face with one arm as the other attempted to steal the can away from me.

I pushed down on the nozzle, pointing it at her only to have her push it away. It became a battle as whip cream sprayed everywhere. She was laughing as she continued to scream loudly for me to stop. It wasn't long at all before the bottle ran out. Before I could do anything, she managed to scramble out from under me and ran over to the fridge.

"Shit," I heard her mutter to herself, "What the hell am I suppose to use now?" I asked myself the same question as I glanced over the food I had brought upstairs for her. On top of being all sweet and sticky, I was also turned on. Odd combo, really.

I suppose any guy would have had he seen Bella in her current state. Her whole body glistened in syrup with patches of whip cream in various parts as well. I licked my lips as I slowly approached her, ready to surrender.

She, on the other hand, had other plans. But before she could squirt a drop of chocolate syrup at me, I grabbed her and hoisted her over my shoulder. She began pounding on my back as I jogged to the bathroom with a large grin.

I opened up the large glass door of the vast shower and turned on the water. I grabbed onto her waist with each hand, setting her down under the warm flow. As we took in each other's appearances once again, we began to laugh. And laugh. And laugh some more.

Then one minute she was wrapping her arms around my neck and dragging me to the floor of the shower. The next I was feeling her up as we made out crazily under flow of the warm water. The syrup and whip cream had quickly vanished down the drain after only a few minutes of being in there.

I sat with my back against the wall and knees bent as she straddled me with her hands on my chest, on my cheeks, in my hair, on my neck. She sat soaking wet on top of me as we basically sucked faces. Even though this wasn't exactly tender or sweet, I still poured all of my newly found love into my actions.

And by pouring love I meant ripping her goddamn underwear off her pretty little body. I moaned loudly as our wet chests made contact and immediately pulled her face back to mine. We gradually began getting up into a standing position as she removed my soaked jeans and boxers.

As soon as everything was gone, I grabbed onto her ass, hoisting her up so that she could wrap her legs around my waist once again. Never breaking our string of intense kisses, I wasted no time slipping myself inside her. She gripped her hands tightly in my hair while moaning loudly into my mouth.

I turned so that her back was up against the wall, placing my hands next to her face as I began a steady pace in and out of her.

Then, something happened. And no, I was not referring to the the temperature change of the water. It was the atmosphere between us – it began changing into something so intense that it made me breathless.

Something that caused me to shut off the running water and gently carry her back into our main room, laying us both down on the bed without so much as removing myself from her or breaking the kiss even once.

A moment ago, all I had wanted to do was fuck the shit out of her. Now, now was different. Now, I had the strongest urge I've ever had to. . ._make love_ to her. The phrase sounded funny to me. Make love. Funny or not, I needed to know that we could be together that way – the way we were _suppose_ to be. This was all going on the assumption she loved me too though of course.

She quickly caught onto my mood as soon as our kissing began again. Maybe she had been there all along. Either way, I smiled against her lips, realizing that we could totally handle this shit. . .

It was breathtaking.

It was intense.

It was everything beyond the description any number of adjectives could provide.

As she rolled off from on top of me and onto her back, her chest rose and fell with each heavy breath she took. I stared up at the ceiling with a huge smile on my face, realizing that things didn't really get much better than this.

After all of _that_ had just happened; what we had just shared, I knew it was time to do some confessing. It was really now or never. "Bella," I sighed breathlessly, turning my head to face her as she did the same.

A beautiful smile crossed her face. "Edward," she sighed back.

It was time for a speech. Not just any speech though – It was time for one of those cheesy-ass, corny, only-in-movies, love-professing speeches. Never in a million years had I ever seen _this_ coming. But I had to. Because I really did love her. And she deserved to know.

And really. When did I _ever_ have the chance to _not_ play the hopeless romantic? For once, I knew cheesy would be quite appropriate.

I laughed at the utter ridiculousness of my thoughts. But my nerves instantly vanished the moment her pretty eyes locked with mine. "Do you want to know something?" I whispered.

Her eyes lit up as she nodded.

"When I'm with you, I feel like things are right." I explained, "Like you've been the missing piece to my puzzle all along." I chuckled quietly, keeping her gaze. "I know it sounds stupid, but I think my puzzle had been broken on purpose. I think everything that happened to me, only happened because those events would lead me to _you_."

Not wasting anytime stalling, I reached over and placed a hand on her pink cheek. "Bella Swan," I told her, stroking soft circles with my thumb. "I think I'm in love with you."

She gave me a look of adoration as she leaned her face into my hand, sighing and fluttering her eyes closed. "Edward Cullen," she said softly, "I don't think I'm in love with you." She paused before her sparkling eyes shot open and a dazzling smile spread across her face. "I _know_ I am."

I smirked, pulling her face to mine as our lips lingered together for a long moment. I took it in – no, I basked it in as I allowed pure bliss to sweep through my already ecstatic body. There was no doubt in my mind that this was the happiest moment of my life. And I sounded like such a goddamn girl for sounding so obsessed, but I couldn't fight with the truth.

And it was cheesy, like I knew it would be. But fuck it. I _liked_ having conversations like these with her.

She smiled against my lips, pulling back a few inches only so that she could look me in the eyes. "Don't laugh," she suddenly warned in a playfully threatening voice. She paused for a few moments, giving me a meaningful look. "Je t'aime." She stated in perfect clarity.

I didn't laugh. Instead, I grabbed onto her, pulling her back on top of me for round two.

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**A/N: **So I figured no A/N last week calls for a longer one this week. Well, not long, actually. But anyways. If you have twitter and haven't added me yet, I'm _simplydazzling. On my profile I have a few description pictures posted (Bella's house, the alley, outfits, etc.) just in case you haven't seen them already.

Thirdly, I have a HUGE favor to ask.  
So it has came to my attention that my summary for TR is fail. Epic fail, to be more specific. So if any kind person out there is willing to think of a better one? I might just have to love you forever. Even though I already do. But you get my point. So if you'd like to help an summary-fail author out, PM me.

Also PM if you have any questions on the story. Ones that AREN'T asking for any spoilers, that is. Because trust me - I understand how confusing a plot line it can be, so if I've lost any of you, do not even hesitate to ask me either A) Are you on an illegal drug? or B) What the EFF is going on in the story right now?

That is all loves.  
I will see you soon. (:

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**CHAPTER SONG: **I'd Hate To Be You - Mayday Parade

_(Okay, so the title's misleading for this song. It's not a hate song. Go listen to it and you'll see. Please? Do it for Edward. HE thinks it's a LOVELY song.)_

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Je t'aime_ - "I love you"

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**Reviews are like Edward telling me he loves me. They really fucking are. (:**


	18. Séjour Fort

**FOR SOME DAMN REASON, FF WAS BEING FAIL AND WOULD NOT FOR THE LIFE OF ME ALLOW ME TO SEND OUT ANY REVIEW REPLIES. I send my sencere apologies and just know that I effing adored the support and feedback from everyone of you! I heart you all times a billion.**

**Okay, so only because I JUST saw it, I feel like I should acknowledge the brillance that is Remember Me.**  
**If you haven't seen it yet, it is a MUST. If you have? Gah, I'd love to hear your thoughts on it. Seriously! I need someone to vent with about it!**

**I NEED YOUR OPINION: How opposed would you be to me writing something. . .outside of angst? Like, a comedy of sorts? Just need opinions, please? :D**

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**Bella - Séjour Fort**

"Hurry!" He panted as he pulled me along down the sidewalk. He laughed loudly as I stumbled, only to be cut off by almost falling himself. The few people out walking stared at us with disapproval as we ran passed them laughing.

"Come on," he repeated, tugging my hand, urging me to go faster.

I had thrown on some sweatshirt of Edward's before we left because the closer night approached, the cooler the humid air became. That had been a good wardrobe choice. My flip-flops on the other hand, had not been. Maybe if I would have known he'd be dragging me at high speeds I could have factored that into my ensemble.

Once we had finally rolled out of bed for the second time that day, he insisted on taking me out around the city. After just walking around the city for a while we had stopped at one of those cute little restaurants where you ate outside with the fountains. After playfully pretending to shove me into them numerous times, he ended up letting me know we could _not_ miss the sunset.

At first, his enthusiasm had confused me. A sunset. Big deal. Even though they may not have been as profound in a large city, you still saw them. After a while, it had struck me.

The last time Edward had seen a sunset would have most likely been a long, long time ago.

Just before it dipped below the horizon, we made it to our destination. It was a small bay. A serene spot presumably made for moments _just_ like this. Swinging our hands with a smile, he led me to a bench right before the ledge of the water.

I cozied into him as we sat down together, resting my head on his shoulder. Neither of us said anything as we watched the brilliant pink and orange colors slowly take over the sky. It was too rich of a moment to be ruined by pointless chatter. Everything that needed to be said was hanging in the air already.

I heard him sigh quietly as the last part of the sun finally disappeared. I turned my head so it was facing his, leaning up as he leaned down. We shared a light, meaningful kiss. That was all that was necessary at the moment.

Our days fell into a pattern.

A wonderfully perfect pattern.

We would fall asleep, tangled in each other's arms from a night of passion. We would wake up – Edward always first, and he'd bring me breakfast in bed. Granted, he didn't _make_ the breakfast, but still. After we ate, we would shower. We had also come to the consensus that it wasn't necessary to use up water, thus setting our daily showers together.

All I knew was that we sure as hell weren't saving _any_ water for the great deal of time we spent in it everyday.

After that we'd usually get dressed for the day and go out. Usually. On occasion, Edward would have a problem with my outfit. Like today. I gave him an eye roll as I inspected myself in the large mirror again. It _seemed_ innocent enough.

"Go change," he growled.

"Well, Edward," I crossed my arms, "I don't see what's so wrong with it."

It was a casual formal dress. Not even that. More like a summer dress, really. It was strapless, tight, and went down mid-thigh. If he thought this was bad, I didn't even want to touch into the topic of how many other things I owned that would make even the devil himself blush.

"Well, Bella," he snapped back, frowning as he came up behind me and coiled his arms around my stomach. "It sort of basically makes me want to rip it off your body and fuck the ever loving shit out of you."

I smirked. "Didn't you _just_ do that though?"

He narrowed his eyes. "Do not tempt me."

My smirk grew even more profound than it already was. "But it's just so _fun_."

He wasn't amused. "No, Bee, it's definitely not fun." Proving his point, he pushed his hips into mine so that I could feel is very obvious boner. I knew we wouldn't be able to leave the hotel until I changed. We were nearing our departure and as much as the decision tore me, I decided we couldn't spend yet another day locked in our room.

I slumped my shoulders. "I just wanted to look pretty." Pouting, I walked over to the closet, selecting something that'd be more 'modest' in Edward's eyes, which was an extremely difficult task. I half debated just throwing on some horrifying sweat suit. _Modest enough for ya now, buddy?_

"You always look pretty," he told me as he sighed, sitting down on the bed as he waited.

"You know," I began from the closet, "I can't dress like that for school, so why can't I now? It's the only time I'm able to." It was a lost argument once again as he quickly shot down my statement.

"Even if you _could_ wear that to school, I don't think I'd be able to let you. Just imagine." I heard him shudder. He did bring up something I had been avoiding for quite the long time now. _School_.

With everything that had been going on lately, it seemed like such a funny concept. What was funny was the fact that I was somehow managing to keep my grades up and perfect _still_. I wondered what would happen when we returned. No doubt something horrible would happen eventually. Where was our happy ending?

"Edward," I asked, slipping on a pair of short-shorts, "Why can't we just talk to Charlie about all of this? I mean, he can help, you know."

I didn't get a response at first, and I knew this had been something he had thought about more times than one. I heard him let out an exasperated breath. "Because, what if he can't? If he joined our team, he'd just add himself to the list of victims they sought revenge on." His answer had been far from a surprise.

"Did you ever think that's maybe his job? It's what he does for a living – Risk his life for others." I told him, sliding on a pink tank-top.

"He's more than that though," he quickly responded, "He's basically in charge of the state's safety. He's in charge of every police, every mission led, and if something happened to _him_, how do you think people would fair? No one does change well, Bella, especially not for something like this. We can figure something else out."

Though I disagreed, I bit my lip and nodded as I walked back into the room. That was the first and only time that conversation was ever brought up for fear of another fight.

Sometimes, you had to trust the people you loved, even if you knew they were completely wrong. It was how love worked. Cherishing the imperfections and learning to live with the flaws they carried along with them.

Saturday morning came by in the blink of an eye, and before we knew it, we were getting back on a plane to face reality's harsh presence.

The pattern we had slipped into would be lost the moment we touched down into Illinois. The thought made me ache inside, knowing that it was possible to achieve perfection, at least for a little while. No longer would we be able to walk the streets freely, hand in hand as we enjoyed the city. No longer would we have the leisures of spending the day in bed together, wrapped in each other's arms without a care in the world.

No longer would we have freedom.

As we had promised Carlisle earlier, we stopped by at his house once again on Saturday morning before we left. This meeting was a lot lighter than the last, though in someways, it bared the weight of the world.

After talking for an hours about pointless nonsense, it was time for us to make our leave. I stood up, embracing Carlisle in a tight hug of gratitude. Whether Edward wanted to admit this to himself or not, our visit had quite the positive impact on him.

"If you ever get the chance," he smiled, "Say hi to your dad for me." I nodded, grinning back and letting him go. He was such a kind man – what a terrible shame Edward was never able to experience his love.

But that was only half true. Carlisle did love Edward. You could see it in his eyes. Even though he may not have been there for the first part of his life, he was there now.

The two stared at each other for a moment, having a silent conversation. "Anything you need," he told him, "Call me. Email me. _Anything_." A small smile tugged at Edward's lips as he nodded. "Are you sure you're going to be okay, son? You don't want me to do anything? . . ." He trailed off. Because even if he did want to do something, he knew there was nothing that he alone could achieve.

"I'll take care of myself," Edward promised. "And I'll update you every once and a while."

No matter how many times Carlisle offered to help, he politely refused, giving the same explanation he had with Charlie. They stared at each other a moment longer before suddenly, Carlisle pulled him into a fierce embrace.

Edward hugged back, and I almost felt like intruding for watching such a private exchange. I looked down at my feet, fighting back tears for some reason.

When we landed in Chicago it was raining. The wet, gray skies put a serious damper on my already bad mood as I slipped into an even deeper glumness. I wanted the sun back. I wanted another vacation. By the serious expression on Edward's face, I could tell he was thinking the same thing.

After we had retrieved our luggage, an idea struck me. Instead of driving the Volvo around, a car the Volturi no doubt recognized, I realized from now on, we'd be renting cars. You know? When someone enters a new state and they need a car to drive around – that's what we'd start doing from now on. At least, whenever it was necessary.

The same smile spread across Edward's face when I told him. He had proceeded to give me a tight hug, complimenting me on my brilliance. For the first time we'd landed, I beamed back at him.

Edward decided it'd be safe if we went to his place, knowing that was where everyone would be. As usual, we parked a good block or two away and ran through the pouring rain with our hoods up.

We burst through the door, laughing at each other's soaking appearance. Our laughter was immediately cut off though by the three faces before us.

Jasper had an arm idly around Alice's shoulder as they sat on the couch. Jasper's expression was worried as Alice, who was on the phone desperately trying to reach someone, matched his. Emmett sat on the futon with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.

They all looked up at us as soon as we walked in. "What's wrong?" I quickly asked, standing frozen in the doorway.

No one spoke at first. A long moment passed by before Emmett sigh, moving his head back to his hands. "Rose's gone," he muttered into them. "We don't know where she is – we can't find her anywhere. She won't pick up her phone."

Edward walked over to Emmett and sat next to him. He put a hand on his back, "Are you sure she's not just out or something?" He asked in a calm voice.

Em shook his head miserably. "She never is on Saturday afternoons. Ever. She always comes here."

Edward stared blankly ahead with a thoughtful expression. "Have you looked for her at all?"

He nodded. "There were only so many places the three of us could go though. This city's huge." After he said this, some strong urge inside of me snapped and I was sliding on my wet jacket once again, grabbing the keys to the BMW and heading out the door.

"Bee, wait," Edward called after me, quickly getting up and rushing over to me. I faced him, raising an eyebrow as I crossed my arms. "Where are you going?"

"To find Rosalie," I told him calmly.

"You can't go alone," He responded with finality that I ignored.

"Yes, I can. I have to." I peaked around him, looking at the others. "We all have to. Everybody split up – we're going to find her."

The authority in my tone was apparently just what everyone needed to snap to their feet. "Hells Bells is right," Em suddenly sounded determined. "Guys, we can't stop until we find her. She has to be somewhere."

"That's the spirit, big guy," Jazz grinned.

Edward gave me an uneasy look, indicating he was hesitant with my current plan. I gave him a dismissive look letting him know that I'd be fine. Sometimes, you just had to go with your gut feeling.

"Jazz, take your car and go around the south part of town," I told him, "Al, take a cab and check all clubs and bars, just in case. Edward, take Em's jeep and get the north part of town." I paused for a moment before Emmett finished for me.

"I'll look everywhere in the immediate area," he confirmed. "Bee, you take your car and cover all of the places we're not." I nodded, sending him a smile of assurance when I noticed his nerves acting up again.

"She'll be fine, Em," I informed him once again. "You know we'll find her. You know, her phone probably just died and she's probably just chilling out somewhere, waiting for the rain to stop."

As I drove, the rain thickened. It was hard to see out the windows at all with this much coming down and the more I drove, the more I began to seriously worry. What if something _did_ happen to her?

Rose and I had never really once saw eye to eye, but then again, that's how she was with everyone. She was the epitome of the phrase 'fuck you, but I love you anyways.' And I did love her. In a weird way, she was the older sister I never had. Without her, it just wasn't the same.

It had been a good half hour of driving. I covered all of the little places no one would think to check. Even though she probably was inside or under shelter, there was a possibility that she was out walking or something. She never failed to surprise me, that was for sure.

I was driving down a barren street; the kind you only see in those sad black and white movies when suddenly, I slammed on the breaks. I was more than a hundred percent positive it was her, even though I couldn't see her face.

I quickly parked the car on the curb and got out. She was soaked – even more than I was. Her blond hair covered her face as she sat on the curb with her face buried in her arms. She didn't hear me come; she didn't acknowledge me as I sat down next to her.

I sat there next to her for what seemed like an hour before she finally looked up at me. Rain dripped from her face as it continued coming down even harder. Mascara was smeared all over her face, and her beautiful blue eyes held the weight of the world as they stared into mine.

"He's gone," she whispered, slowly lowering her head once again. "He's gone." There was only one possible person that fit who she was talking about. Stunned, my eyes widened. Before I knew it, she began crying. Not a loud, miserable sob. It was the opposite – the opposite, and ten times worse.

Even though it was raining, you could tell which ones were her tears. The anguished look in her eyes was something I'd remember for the rest of my life as she began to shake, laying her head on my shoulder.

I wrapped an arm around her and held her as she cried. And cried. And cried. I even cried. Because never in my life had I ever seen anyone in so much mental pain. Not even Edward. I could only imagine how she was feeling on the inside right now.

I wasn't sure how much time had passed since I first found her before she finally mustered the strength to stand up, silently walking over and getting into the passenger seat of the BMW. Completely soaked in a freezing rain, I also silently got in and started the car, driving back to where I knew everyone was waiting. The sky had grown dark in our absence.

Edward had texted me so many times; I lost track after ten. I had been too busy with Rose to respond to any of them. I bit my lip as I internally cursed myself. He was probably flipping out right now.

Pushing down harder on the gas as I weaved through the busy streets, we both dripped and shook from the rain. Neither of us said a word – she couldn't handle it at the moment. All she needed was someone who could _really_ comfort her.

The rain was coming down even thicker now, making it virtually impossible to see much in front of you. I took that as an opportunity to park right alongside the mouth of the alley.

Unsure of how stable she was at the moment, I wrapped an arm around her as we both ran through puddles to get to the door. I wasted no time bursting the both of us through the door. Warm air surrounded our skin and I think we both let out a sigh.

Edward was pacing the middle of the room with his hands pulling stressfully at his hair when he looked over and saw us standing in the doorway. His relieved sigh was so loud, I heard it from across the room. "_Bella_," he quickly rushed over to me, ignoring the fact that I was drenched in water and wasted no time in pulling me to his chest. My teeth chattered as I let his warm body engulf me for a few moments before pulling away with a serious expression.

"R-R-Rose," I chattered, glancing over at her as she stared down at the ground, crossing her arms. He studied her for a few moments before understandment touched his eyes. They were all so close – I suppose it didn't surprise me that he knew what had happened.

"Emmett!" Edward called loudly. He immediately appeared in the doorway, followed by Jazz and Alice. It took them just about as long as Edward had to find out what was wrong.

Em pulled Rose into a tight hug, wrapping his arms all the way around her thin, wet body. She shook like me, only for a different reason. "Rosie, I'm so sorry," he whispered into her hair. Alice's expression was shocked and Jasper's was remorseful. He put his arm on her shoulder as both Emmett and Rosalie silently went into the bedroom and closed the door. I knew it would be the last time either of them would make an appearance for a long time.

"I can't believe he died," Jazz shook his head as we all stared at each other. "He was so strong. He was suppose to live longer than that. I thought his cancer had been getting better."

No one knew what to say. I shivered as the four of us stood there in shock. It was minutes before any of us finally moved. We finally migrated to the main room as I clung on to Edward for warmth.

"Jesus, Bee," he squeezed me tighter. "You're a walking ice cube. Why would you stay out in the rain that long?" I gave him a look indicating that he wouldn't have understood unless he had been there.

"Come on, Bella," Alice stole me from him, "I've got a robe you can wear. You need to get outta those clothes before you catch something bad." By how long I had been outside, I was guessing it was already too late to save me from some minor cold already in the process.

Minutes later I was sliding on some spare flannel pajamas she had and putting on a large, puffy, soft pink bathrobe. Idly, I asked her where she got it, noting to myself how much I needed one of them.

"Thanks, Bella," she told me quietly before we walked back out into the main room. "Thanks for finding her soon enough. I don't. . .I don't know if she would have made it through the night without you there," she finished in a whisper.

I nodded with a small smile. "It's what family does, right?"

She smiled back, pulling me into a fierce hug. Still in my state of near frost bite, I hobbled back out with my arms wrapped tightly around myself. I had thrown my damp hair up into a bun, preventing it from dripping on me as much.

Edward was lounging on the futon in a half-sitting, half-laying position and Jasper was on the couch as we walked out. The TV was on, but wasn't really being watched. I walked over to him, laying myself down on him in exhaustion and the need for warmth.

He rested his chin on the top of my head as his arms constricted around my still shivering body. "When are your parents getting back?" He asked curiously.

"Tomorrow night," I murmured, already infatuated by the sudden warmth to the point of sleepiness.

"Alright well then we'll stay here tonight. You can't afford to be out in the rain anymore." I nodded in cold agreement, nuzzling my nose into his warm, comfortable chest. He rubbed my back lightly as I shut my eyes in exhaustion.

"Oh, and Bee?" He asked softly.

"Hmmm?" I murmured.

"Do not _ever_ scare me like that again. Next time you disappear for three hours, for the love of all that is holy, at _least_ tell me you're okay or something." I realized that what he was saying was right, and what I did was unfair.

"Sorry," I apologized quietly.

He chuckled quietly into my hair, planting a light kiss on my head as his lips lingered there for a few moments. "Already forgiven. Now sleep. Or I might just have to kick your ass." He threatened with a hallow chuckle.

Even though the joking may have been playful and the room may have been light, the weight of the world sat two rooms down from us on the shoulders of a shattered girl and her savior – two people who didn't deserve anymore pain.

Six people who didn't deserve anymore pain.

A family of broken.

For reasons beyond me, Rosalie didn't want to do the whole funeral thing for her dad. Well, she did, but not really. She wanted it to be just her and the priest. No wake, no reception, nothing. Edward had explained early to me that besides her dad, she didn't have any relatives other than the ones on her mom's side who she had never met before.

I woke up in a state of disorientation as I groggily rubbed my eyes. I had fallen asleep way earlier than usual the previous night, so the fact that I was waking up before nine wasn't too big of a surprise.

The fact that I was the first one up, on the other hand, was a surprised.

It had to be the first time in the history of forever when I got to be the first one awake. I noted the slight change in our position – instead of on top of him I was beside him. One arm was resting on my back, holding me against him while the other kept my head securely placed on his chest. I smiled to myself.

I stayed still, since moving myself would wake Edward up. I wanted him to sleep for as long as he could. The insomnia didn't work just one way with the both of us – some nights, sleep was virtually impossible to achieve.

Given our situation though, it was really only to be expected I suppose.

I wondered how Rose was holding up. Emmett was the best possible person in the world for her to be with at a time like this. He would not only act as her wings and halo, but also the softness of a teddy bear she had been missing all of her life.

As horrible as this all was, in a way, his death saved her. She was free now. I knew for a fact that he would never have wanted his daughter to live another day in the life she had been for quite sometime. I knew he would be smiling down at her from heaven for the rest of her life.

An hour later Edward shifted next to me. I kept my breathing steady and my eyes closed, wanting to know how exactly he woke up in the mornings. I bit back a smile as he sleepily nuzzled his nose into my hair, squeezing me tightly to him before loosening his grip immensely. I heard him yawn quietly to himself.

Were Alice and Jasper in the room? I had fallen asleep before they had left. There was a possibility they were on the couch, still sleeping.

Keeping my eyes shut, I slowly moved both my hands, slipping them under his shirt. He stiffened before relaxing as my hands ran up and down his warm chest. "Mmmm," he hummed with a smile in his voice.

It was a shortened version of our normal routine that I'd have to start getting use to. We weren't on vacation. We were in reality. I sighed before leaning up and placing my lips firmly on his. I knew the same thing was running through his mind as he kissed me back, making it worth while.

We laid on the couch together and watched TV until Alice and Jazz woke up. While we all waited for Rosalie and Emmett to make an appearance, Edward provided them the lovely conversation of his wonderfully cheery past.

As if we weren't all in a bad enough mood already.

And I had already _heard_ the story.

Their reactions had been predictable – they were shocked yet at the same time, hardly surprised. Obviously he had told them bits of pieces and I guess over time they had been able to put them together. Before they could ask the typical 'Edward, what can we do to help?', he flat out told them to act the same as they have been for the passed two years and that they would be fine as long as they didn't meddle like _I_ had. I grimaced when he said that.

Eventually, after the weight of emotions became heavier on all of us after Edward's story, Rosalie walked into the room.

She looked absolutely dreadful and my first instinct had been to run up and give her a huge hug. Her eyes were bloodshot, red, and puffy. Her hair was a tangled mess and the look on her face resembled a corpse.

She did not look at any of us. She walked to the fridge, grabbed two bagels and began retreating back to the room once again.

"Rosie," Edward called to her before she disappeared. She stopped, turning around to look at him as her eyes swam in a fresh batch of unshed tears. "Séjour fort," he told her with an irresistible amount of comfort in his voice.

She stared at him for a long moment, a tear drop rolling out of her eye before she bit her lip and nodded, walking out of the room without another word.

My stomach lurched at the fact that it was possible for even the strongest to fall. With that thought, I clung myself to Edward just a little tighter. I didn't want to take any of the time we had together for granted.

Because what if I woke up tomorrow morning. . .and he was gone?

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Hold My Heart - Tenth Avenue

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Séjour fort _- "stay strong"

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**Reviews are better than a broken family.**


	19. Elle Est Morte

**Wow, sorry it took me so long to post this!  
*drum roll* Chapter 19! Finally, right?  
And I can't believe we're already this far.  
Insanity, I tell you!  
Thanks for stickin' with me though. (:**

**And we hit 500!**  
**This calls for some sort of celebration...**  
**...Yeah. Well, not sure how that's going to work...**  
***nervous laugh***  
**This chapter's your present!**

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**Edward - Elle Est Morte**

Things were back in normal mode and already our trip to Arizona seemed like some far off fantasy that had never happened. Not only did we have less together time, but we also had to watch our backs like crazy. And each other's backs for that matter as well.

I swear, there wasn't a time I _wouldn't_ be glancing over my shoulder.

Oddly enough though, ever since our escape I had yet to receive a single word from them. No texts, no phone calls. Of course, I couldn't take that as being a good thing or a bad thing just yet. Either way, Bella and I became the masters of hiding in plain sight.

I never would have thought having someone with me through all of this would make things easier. Maybe that was just because we were still in our 'we love each other more than life itself' phases. The idea still hadn't grasped itself around my head and I wondered out loud many times when I would finally get used to the idea of being in love.

Rosalie said little over the next week and Emmett remained glued at her side at all times. He wouldn't even leave her to go and see his mother in rehab, who was apparently having a good recovery. Just like my prediction had been before – going through hardships only made one's relationship stronger.

Bella and I were living proof of that, and I think after telling them all the _whole_ story, they realized it as well. I had to admit – it was weird having everything out in the open. Going so long with hiding things inside of me, it would be a lie to say I didn't feel slightly relieved about it all.

Not only had they been understanding and sympathetic – the sympathy had been irritating – they had also stood by me in a hundred percent support. By that I mean listening to me when I told them to listen to my directions.

So on top of being in love for the first time, coping with the meeting from the father who was now trying to put himself back into my life, dealing with everyone knowing everything about me, _and_ the death of Rosalie's dad, I'd say I was holding out pretty good.

Bella appeared that way too. Granted, Bella _always_ appeared that way, but she had made me a promise to start trying to make her real emotions present to me more often. She didn't exactly follow through on it, but I could tell she was trying.

Bella and I were inseparable. Every night we'd either stay at her place or at mine. Sometimes even Jazz's house too when we all crashed there. At school, I was holding her hand a good ninety percent of the time.

I had even gotten used to sitting with her plastic friends. Sometimes I even provided conversation. I may have been hated by a majority of the guys at that school, but Bella made it known that if they fucked with me, she'd end them. That was my sweet, kind girlfriend for you.

We avoided going anywhere in public. Bella pleaded for me to let her the other day though – her and Alice apparently needed a girl's night on the town. Whatever the hell that meant. After a lot of debating she eventually just threw on her blond disguise and some big, Hollywood sunglasses.

That night Jazz and I had spent a solid four hours playing Call of Duty. I _owned_ at that shit.

Another week went by – Rosalie continued to mope, we all continued to be remorseful towards her, Bella continued to be Bella, and I continued to worry. Everyone hated when I worried; I wasn't exactly the most optimistic guy around. I couldn't help it though. I honestly couldn't.

Wednesday I had received a very eerie phone call. When I had answered, all I heard was static and heavy movement in the background, like a car. It was the first time they had ever called under a private number, and that fact almost had me even more uneasy than the call itself.

Through the cracking, bad connection, I had been able to make out this: ". . .Stay inside. . .You'll pay. . .all of you. . .watch your back. . ." And then, as clear as day, "We are hunting, cousin."

All of you? I refused to believe they had somehow figured out about _all_ of us. Bella and I had stayed home from school; Al and Jazz went to Jazz's house; Em and Rose went to Rose's empty house. We remained inside the whole day, never chancing to even look out the window. Events in the past had brought me to realize how seriously we needed to take all of this.

Bella had been coughing and sneezing miserably ever since her and Rose had sat out in the rain for two hours. She had been braving school but crashing immediately once she got home everyday. I risked my own health to remain closer to her than ever. Besides, I've handled way worse than a little cold before.

NyQuil did strange things to a person's thought processing. For instance – Bella's body was immune to certain medicines. She would take the night-time medicine and instead of getting tired, the side affects would make it seem like she had just downed five glasses of Jack.

Emmett had a little _too_ much fun with that. I could hardly stop his shameless teasing though – it was the only thing that made him smile lately.

On the couch with an arm wrapped securely around a depressed Rosalie, Emmett laughed uncontrollably as Bella attempted to keep a serious expression on her face. I rolled my eyes, keeping an arm lazily around her shoulders on the futon as she leaned into my chest.

"Hey, Bee," Em taunted. "What's two plus two?"

I snapped an irritated glance in the direction of his smirking face. "She's on cold medication, dumbass, not mentally incapable."

She giggled, bringing her head back so that she was looking up at my face. "Eddie," she almost slurred. "Don't call Emmett a mean name." I grimaced at the nickname, hoping once she got over this illness the dreaded name would never come up again.

"_Eddie_," Em chuckled loudly, repeating it over and over in a girl's voice.

I frowned at her, tightening my grip around her. "Honey," I spoke with condescension, "How about you try and take a nap? You look tired."

She pursed her lips as her wide eyes stared at me in curiosity. "What does tired look like?"

"Yeah, Eddie," Em snickered. "What _does_ tired look like?"

If I wasn't so concerned about Bella's well-being, I would have stopped giving her the damn cold medicine _long_ ago. Unfortunately, sacrifices had to be made for the people you loved. Even if that meant sacrificing some of your self-dignity. . .

Thankfully she stayed home again and slept the whole day, causing her cold to be virtually gone. No one was happier than me – I was _sure_ of that.

The weekend was uneventful other than dinner at Jazz's Saturday night. Sunday the six of us had a movie day at Bella's. There was nothing like a good excuse to hold onto Bella all day. I had sighed eternally when I realized what a girl I was becoming.

Monday rolled along with its usual groans and complaints. By the middle of the day, we were both ready for it to be weekend again. No, not even that, actually. We were both ready for relief. We hadn't gotten any in so long.

It was the last class of the day – AP world. We were doing a project in groups of three. Ironically enough, Jacob Black managed to end up in a group with Bella and I. Ironically enough, I got a little pissed that I'd have to watch him ogle Bella for the next hour.

It was ridiculously obvious how over him she was, but I still couldn't help but notice the fact that she put in extra effort to include him in our conversations. I began muttering French profanities under my breath every time the douche would stare at her chest.

Since we had been best friends, he had changed. For the worse. Jake used to be so warm and friendly. Now, he was cocky and arrogant, and sometimes even mean.

"So, how was your weekend, Bells?" It was like he was _trying_ to emphasize the fact that he had some cute pet name for her so I'd get mad. He achieved quite the opposite really. All his 'bragging' managed to earn from me was a very pointed eye roll.

"Good," she responded cheerfully, oblivious to our silent exchange. _She_ may have thought they had gotten passed the awkward-post-break-up-stage to the just-friends-stage. She was most definitely a hundred percent wrong.

I was a guy, and it was a hundred percent obvious that the dude was still head over heals for the girl. I could hardly blame him, but seriously. I shot him a look that asked him to do me a favor and keep it in his pants.

"Not much happened, but it was still fun." She finished happily.

Forcing a smile to please her, I knew, he turned to me. "Masen? How was your weekend?" What kind of loser started a conversation like that. He may have been cocky but he most certainly wasn't cool.

Sometimes, it was easy to mix the two C's up.

"Just wonderful," I responded curtly, "I spent it with Bella." It came off as maybe a bit pretentious but I could hardly care. This was the only time I actually acted like an asshole: school. It was all part of the experience, I told Bella with my eyes as she gave me a disproving look. I shrugged.

"Great," he responded, trying to hide the disappointment from his voice.

A few moments of awkward silence went by as we each stared over our lab paper. "So, Jacob. . ." Bella began hopefully, "How was _your_ weekend?" I fought back a smirk as she shot me yet another murderous look.

"Decent," he seemed way too pleased that she was talking to him. I scooted my chair closer to hers, wrapping an arm protectively around her waist. It wasn't that I was jealous because obviously I already _had_ her, I just wasn't too sure he understood the meaning of unavailable.

"I played some baseball with the guys," he told her, "It was the first time we've been able to in a while. It's nice to throw the ball around, you know?"

I coughed to cover up my obvious chuckle. "I bet it is," I muttered under my breath. "You would know all about that, wouldn't you?" It was only loud enough for Bella to hear, so I could hardly consider myself being mean.

Like I said – It was all part of the high school experience.

"Edward!" She scolded in a loud whisper. It took her a few seconds to realize her mistake before she was suddenly gaping and backtracking. The look on Jacob's face was clear that her slip was not missed by him.

"Masen," she corrected herself, gritting her teeth together. "I meant _Masen_."

I made my face as innocent as possible, keeping my mouth shut so I wouldn't fuck this up any further. Jacob stared at the both of us for a long moment. "No," he shook his head, holding Bella's nervous gaze. "You said Edward."

"Edward, Masen," I chuckled, waving my hand dismissively to break the tension. "They sound the same. People always get them confused." I even had to laugh at my own logic.

"Nice going, dumbass," Bella murmured irritatedly under her breath. "I'm sure you convinced him."

I grimaced, sticking my tongue out and crossing my arms. I was just trying to save her sorry ass. "What the hell is going on here?" Jacob asked flatly. Bella bit her lip as I looked anywhere but his face.

"Nothing," she said in a tiny voice. "Nothing at all, Jake."

He rolled his eyes, as did I. She was such a good liar – why did she pick the worse of times to _not_ show that. "Bella." He stated. "I did date you once, remember?" She grimaced as she looked down at her feet and nodded.

He shifted his gaze to me. I couldn't avoid his hard stare. He frowned as I attempted another innocent smile. "Are you or are you not Edward Cullen?"

I gave him a nervous grin before turning to Bella. She narrowed her eyes, "No, this one's all you, _Masen_."

"Well, technically I'm–"

"Are you Edward Cullen?" He asked, cutting me off.

I raked my hand through my hair, sighing in defeat. "In the living flesh," I half-groaned. I watched as millions of questions flashed in his wide eyes while his jaw dropped to the floor.

Bella bit her lip _again_ as she carefully watched his reaction. "So I had been right that first day, hadn't I?" I wasn't sure who he was speaking to, but I nodded regardless. "I thought you died. . .Where have you been –. . .Why the hell is your name Masen?" His questions were giving me a headache. The last thing I wanted to do was spend an hour explaining to my girlfriend's ex boyfriend, my ex best friend, why my life was so twistedly fucked.

Bella, bless her soul, read that on my face. "Look, Jake," she began in a soft, pleading tone. "You can't tell anyone. _Anyone_. I'm serious; this is so much of a bigger deal than you think it is. We can't tell you anything because it would be putting yourself in danger. Fair enough?"

I nodded in agreement to her statement, giving him a serious look before a faint smile spread across my face as his dropped from confusion to irritation. Maybe even a little bit of hurt. I couldn't imagine why.

"Ed, we were best friends," he turned to me with his somber expression. "I thought you had died. Couldn't you have filled me in at one point in time?"

I shook my head. "She said it all – it's too dangerous for you to know anything."

He looked at the both of us for a long moment, studying our faces and searching for something I did not know. Suddenly, he was shoving everything into his backpack and getting up from his seat. "You two really are perfect for each other," he hissed with a great deal of acid in his voice. Then, in quite the haste, he got up and left the room.

I could have cared less about his departure. Like I said, he had changed over the years and the best friend I use to have had been the smiley ten year-old boy back in the fourth grade.

Bella stared blankly out the window as she shook her head. "Am I a bad person?" She asked quietly as she remained holding her gaze on nothing.

"Of course not," I scoffed. "Why would you be a bad person?"

She shook her head. "I don't know," she commended. "I just feel like I'm doing something wrong. Do you ever get the feeling that we're in over our heads?"

I knew where this conversation was going, and I dreaded it. "Sometimes," I answered honestly. "But it's nothing we can't handle," I quickly added. What a shit answer. I really had to get better with the whole 'don't worry, Bella, we'll be okay' thing.

She sighed again before shooting me a hesitant glance. "Maybe we can get help. . .?"

I groaned, rubbing my hands over my eyes before slouching further in my seat. It's not that Charlie or Carlisle couldn't help, because maybe they could – it was the possibility of getting yet another person involved in this.

Charlie may have been a powerful man, but I knew the Volturi. The fact that he basically owned the state of Illinois wouldn't make a difference whether they continued to get away with what they were doing or not. There were so damn many of them. I didn't want anything to happen that could have easily been prevented.

I had given her that answer a million times, so I tried a new one. "I don't want your dad to hate me," I stated honestly, "If we try and explain what's going on, how do you think he'll react?"

"Come on," she whined, "You've met my dad – he's not like that; he's cool."

I rolled my eyes. "Bella. You can keep thinking that in your head as much as you want, but think about this: how would _you_ react, being in his shoes? I basically put a price on your head. Sorry, but I'm not too sure he'll be 'cool' with it when he finds out everything."

She pursed her lips, considering what I was saying. I glanced around the room, realizing that we had gained the attention of a few on-looking classmates. I must have been talking too loud. Well, _that_ must have been an interesting conversation to eavesdrop on.

"Look, Bee," I finally sighed. "We'll figure this out. Somehow. Trust me?"

She rose her brown eyes up to mine and held my gaze for a few moments before finally nodding her head in defeat. Victory was bittersweet knowing that this was the only argument I was ever able to win.

Unfortunately though, my lies could only go so far before she stopped believing them.

Rosalie was gradually becoming herself again. The first sign was on Thursday when she bitched at me for leaving the toilet seat up. I hadn't been able to keep from smiling as she insulted my living ethics.

Friday she had a full-on rant about how I used the hot water up. "Edward, I have half a mind to cut off your motherfucking penis, freeze it in this god damn ice water, then make you eat it!"

Ah, how I had missed you, Rosalie.

It was also not a secret that her and Em's relationship had escalated massively over the past few weeks. It had gotten to the point where I actually found it. . .cute. Which was saying a whole fucking lot about both them _and_ me.

Not only had her relationship with Emmett grew stronger, but I also began taking note on the closeness she was developing with Bella. They actually were beginning to have pleasant conversations. It may not have seemed like a huge deal, but since it was Rosalie, it certainly was.

Things may not have been perfect, but for the moment, it actually seemed that way.

**Bella**

I found myself growing more and more comfortable with all of this.

Edward was right to have me trust him – everything was going fine lately. We were being as cautious as possible; as sneaky as possible when it came to anything that put us in even the slightest jeopardy.

I grew accustomed to being held every night, and was extremely okay with spending every waking moment that I could with him.

We had fallen into many patterns before, but this seemed to be the one that worked the best. It was unheard of for anything suspicious to happen at school. At my house, like always, we never really had to worry.

At Edward's however, there was always that slight eerie feeling that hung in the air and stayed there. No one wanted to ever say it out loud, but everyone was always thinking it: What if they find us here?

I really couldn't see how they could, but then again, that's what I thought with a lot of other things they ended up succeeding on as well.

I always pushed my negative thoughts to the back of my mind and allowed myself to feel safe whenever Edward was with me. Not only did I feel safe, but for the first time in my life I felt complete. Ever since we had admitted our love for each other, there wasn't a single wall standing in between us.

The progress we had made from the beginning was so immense, I almost couldn't wrap my head around it all. When I had first met Edward, he had hated me. He had pushed me away, wanting nothing to do with me.

He rarely spoke, never let anyone know what he was really feeling inside, and put himself into a state of inflicting pain on himself by wallowing in self-misery as he held everything inside of him.

When I had first met Edward, his eyes had resembled a corpse.

Now, they were alive.

Saturday Edward went over to Rosalie's place with her and Emmett to help move some furniture around. He had rode in Em's car with them and I was suppose to pick him up somewhere when they were finished because the other two were staying there for the night.

After I received his fifteen minute warning of when he'd be ready, I put away my school books and headed out to the Volvo, waving goodbye to Laurent as I left. My mom was out shopping and Charlie was at the office.

It was a nice day, so I parked my car about a half a mile from where he would be and decided to walk the rest of the way. Besides, that's what Edward told me to do anyways, just in case.

I was only a block away from where Edward had told me to meet him when I started hearing sirens. I told myself not to think about them too much – There was a lot of people in the city, after all, and it wasn't unusual to hear them.

I also told myself not to be so paranoid. Edward had told me that they wouldn't be hunting today, and that we could breathe easy for a few hours. I had this sinking feeling in me for a fleeting moment; What if he had been wrong? What if the many, loud, close-by sirens really _did_ mean something?

I sped my walk up just a little faster; my Ugg boots quickly padding on the sidewalk. As I turned the corner, I froze mid-step. My eyes widened at the sight before me, even though I couldn't exactly see anything.

As it appeared, the sirens I had been hearing were all gathered and parked in the middle of the busy road. There were at least ten different fire fighters, police officers, and paramedics scrambling around the scene that I could not yet identify.

I suddenly began running, glancing around for any signs or flashes of bronze hair. This couldn't be happening; this wasn't happening. _Nothing_ had happened to him, I thought fiercely. As I came closer to the taped off area, the crowd became thicker thicker.

Pushing my way through them frantically, I came into a small opening. There was a man; he had his back to me, looking at whatever accident had happened. It took me a few moments before I realized who it was.

"Edward!" I cried, throwing myself at him.

When I knocked into him, he was completely stiff – like a rock. It took a long time before his arms wrapped around me robotically, and when I finally looked up to study his face, the relief instantly left me, replaced by panic.

His eyes were ancient; the green emeralds completely masked off in a horrible pain. Every feature of his face was stressed and tensed. His jaw was mashed into a hard line. Everything about him seemed to be in shock, and it looked like he was about to break..

Something bad had happened.

Something _really_ bad.

I let go of Edward and instantly began trying to push my way through more people, but Edward kept an arm tightly around my stomach – restraining me. I continued squirming and wiggling my way out of his grasp. The more I ran and shoved my way frantically through everyone, the more nervous I became. Eventually, I succeeded, shoving my way through all the hushed on-lookers.

When I finally made my way to the front of the crowd, I was almost knocked over by the impact on the sight before me. I felt Edward behind me, "Bella." He whispered, his voice agonized.

I didn't need an explanation though.

What I needed was to know that I was dreaming – To know that this was _not _really happening.

In the middle of the street, there were broken pieces of glass, along with charred scraps of red metal. The shattered parts of the car weren't what my eyes were focusing on though; They zeroed in on the actual car – the broken, torched form of the red Ferrari. Of _my_ red Ferrari.

The same red Ferrari that I let my mother drive around in shopping today because her car was running low on gas. The same car that was no longer together. The same car that had held my mother, only minutes ago. . .

"No," I began chanting from my unmoving mouth. "No, no, no, no. . ."

All of the paramedics; all of the police officers; the looks on everyone's faces. Most importantly, the look on Edward's incredibly paled face. All of a sudden, every came crashing over my head with bursting intuition.

In that second, everything inside me seemed as if it had been shattered.

"Bella," Edward repeated, his voice louder this time, and even more strangled. "Elle est morte." I couldn't _understand_ French, but I knew what he said.

And my heart sank.

Everything seemed to be happening in slow motion; there were voices, but I couldn't hear them anymore. There were people calling my name, but I was unable to respond. There were even more sirens, but they were blocked out by the loud, silent stare that Edward was giving me. Because the moment my eyes met Edward's, it was my unspoken confirmation. His dead, flat eyes confirmed that my worst fears had been fulfilled.

There was nothing. Nothing but complete numbness.

The next thing I knew, I was sprinting towards the banged up, blown up car. "Mom!" I screamed frantically, "Mom, where are you?!" I couldn't control the ripped sobs tearing through my chest. "Mom!"

Edward, much faster than me, caught up quickly. His strong arms once again restrained me. I thrashed violently against him as they formed a secure, iron cage around me, holding me against his chest. "Let me go!" I shrieked. "Mom!" I continued to yell as tears gushed miserably from my eyes.

I was there – but at the same time, I wasn't. I could feel myself shaking violently in his arms, and continued to hear the distanced echoes of voices calling out to me.

"No, mom!" My voice cracked an octave higher in hysteria. "Mom, _no_!"

"Bella!" Edward shouted, tightening his grip around me. Another loud sob erupted from my chest as I finally gave up fighting against him. Instead, I turned my body towards him, hiding my face in his chest as I started to cry some more, letting everything pour out of me.

He wrapped his arms around me, holding me tightly against his chest and hiding me from the world. I trembled in his arms as I continued shaking my head back and forth.

After an immeasurable moment, I glanced up at Edward through my wet eyes. His piercing green eyes looked back at me, tortured. It wasn't long before he pulled me fiercely back against his chest. "Mom," I began chanting silently again, my voice cracking in pain at the uselessness of my pleas for her to come back to me.

Edward rocked me back and forth, trying to soothe me. "She's not coming back." He whispered, his voice sounding nothing like him. "Bella, she's not coming back."

As he said these words, I felt a tap on my back. Shaking, I turned around to see who it was. I was met by the face of a very grim looking police officer whom I recognized to be one of my father's friends. I knew what he had to say, and I didn't want to hear it. I tried blocking out his voice as he said the words, but nothing could drown out the incredibly painful sting they created in my chest.

"Bella," his voice sounded far away. "Your mother was killed in a car bomb."

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Tonight - FM Static

_OH, my lord. If you have never listened to this song before, you have to. I mean HAVE to. The most gorgeous song ever. Absolute favorite at the moment, by the way. You'll see why I chose it. I promise._

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **Elle Est Morte - "she died"

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**Reviews are better than car bombs. Like srsly.**


	20. Je Vous Ai

**Yeah, you probably all hate me right now still, don't you?  
Well I wish I could tell you this chapter will change that.  
-sigh- What did you expect? I warned you all about the angst.  
Just know, I feel the same thing you guys feel when you read the story as I do when I _write_ the story.  
So, ya know, there is a level of fairness on there somewhere. (:**

**Chapter 20, ladies and gentlemen.  
Can't believe it's already this far!  
Seems like just yesterday I was posting the first chapter. . .**

**-happy sigh-**

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**Edward - ****Je Vous Ai**

There were some sounds that once you heard, never left your memory; Always coming back to haunt you in times least expected. The sounds so terrible, so agonizingly painful that each time you remembered them, a part of your soul would die a little.

I now had three.

The sound of my mother – her tortured screams and broken pleas as I listened to her get beaten to death in agony from the bitter wrath of my uncle's fury.

The sound of the first phone call I had received from the Volturi. The remembrance of cold splinters shooting down my spine as the harsh voice sneered that I was to die, and that they wouldn't stop until I was dead.

Then, there was the sound of Charlie Swan's loud, strangled scream somewhere in the distance at realization of what had happened to his wife. The sound reached deep into my core – shaking up my very being and threatening to destroy me. I had never heard a sound so tormented, so disturbed in my life.

Bella – in her state of complete shock – must have heard it too. She began shaking some more, only this time I knew her legs would not hold her up any longer.

I hoisted her off of her feet, wrapping her legs tightly around my waist and directing her hands to cling on around my neck. I held her as a father would hold his small, sleeping daughter if he were carrying her up to bed. Only it was nothing like that.

I held her as a boyfriend who's girlfriend's mother just got killed for no reason. Correction – _no reason _wouldn't be the right answer. _No reason_ would be better than the actual reason. I was the actual reason. It was because of me.

With her head buried into the crook of my neck, resting on my shoulder, tortured sobs continued erupting furiously from her chest.

I didn't know what to do – where to take her – where to go. Usually, I'd always have a general idea or answer of what I was suppose to do at any given time. Normally, I was able to react to a situation in a moment's notice.

For once, I was at a complete loss for words.

This was my fault. That fact tore at me, testing everything I thought I had known, and everything that I now realized was wrong.

Because now, I was just a child. Whatever obstacles I had gone through trying to get to get here now, everything I had fought off from me for so long, had all been wrong. Completely, and utterly wrong.

I didn't feel sorry for myself anymore. Not after this. I was always the one moping around, whining all of the fucking time about how my life absolutely sucked, and how the world was a cruel, unfair bitch.

But I realized that I had been destined all along for those things. It was just the way they had always been meant to be. What had never been meant to be was _this_.

As I continued hearing Charlie's screams in the distance, I knew that I would have to live through a whole lot more; see a whole lot more before I truly understood the loss of which he had currently been presented with.

Both him, and the fragile, now broken girl in my arms.

She hadn't been broken before she met me. Now she was.

I was a monster.

What was worse was the fact that Bella had been the one who they had been targeting. It was Bella whom they wished to be in the car while they flicked a button, attempting to take her away from me. The fact sent cold shivers up my spine at the realization that it could have been Bella in that car.

It could have been Bella who had died.

I held onto her, supporting all of her weight as I looked around the scene before me. I didn't know where to go – I didn't know where to take her. I didn't know what to do, what to say, or what to feel.

I felt the moisture from Bella's tears through my shirt as she trembled in my arms. I tried to blink away the sight before me, but it was no use.

Nothing was stopping me from seeing the crumpled, broken up body of Renee Swan as they pulled her from the ruins of the shattered car. Nothing was stopping me from witnessing a fireman remove his hat in remorse as he delivered the verdict to a frantic Charlie.

Nothing had stopped me from watching a grown man fall to his knees.

I was eighteen.

This wasn't the first death I had been present for.

People all around us were shouting Bella's name. She remained lifeless as I held her limp body in a state of shock. Some were even reaching for her, claiming themselves better suitable to comfort her in a time like this. I refused to let her go though.

Lost and disoriented, I was seconds away from collapsing myself. I couldn't let that happen. I had to be Bella's rock. I had to take care of her. I couldn't break at a time like this. _I had to be strong_.

I wasn't sure how long I stood there before a policemen noticed Bella and I. He saw the confusion on my face, read the questions in my eyes. "Take her home, son," he ordered softly. "Just. . .be there for her, okay?"

I nodded, wondering myself why I hadn't came to that conclusion. "We're figuring this out," he told me. "I'm sure people will be over at the house shortly. We're trying to calm Charlie down." Once again, all I could do was nod.

Giving me one last sympathetic look, he turned away and jogged back to the group of policemen gathered around the scene. I swallowed the dry lump in my throat as I willed myself not to glance anywhere near Charlie's direction.

If I saw Charlie, I would be done for.

Not really being able to feel what I was doing, I slowly walked through the crowd of grave onlookers as I began the walk to Bella's. I had no idea of knowing where she had parked the Volvo and I didn't feel like looking for it. Besides, if it happened to the Ferrari, who was to say they hadn't placed one in her other car as well?

The Volturi were the farthest from my mind at the moment as I maintained a firm grip on the limp girl in my arms. The only part of her that was moving was her chest – rising and falling in furious motions as her cries ripped through her body.

I stumbled, almost falling to the ground. There was no way in hell I could do this. I reached in my back pocket, flipping out my cell. Dialing Jazz's number with one hand, I placed the phone on my shoulder and held it with my neck as I focused my grip back on Bella's body.

"You rang?" He answered from the other end.

I knew my voice would be unsteady, so I said as minimum as I possibly could. "We need you to come pick us up. Right now." Then I told him where we would be.

He knew me well enough to recognize the tone in my voice. "Got it, Ed. I'll be there as soon as I possibly can." I jammed it back into my pocket once again as I continued walking.

A man ran up to me and shouted something frantic in my face but I couldn't make out his words. I couldn't really make out. . .anything. I shook my head at him and pressed on, not wanting to turn around. Not wanting to have to witness the impact of the explosion for the second time.

Everything seemed so surreal.

No more than ten minutes later, Jazz was pulling up next to us on the sidewalk. Keeping a tight grip on Bella as she continued to cling to me, I gently slid us both into the back seat of his car. "Bella's," I announced as soon as the door was closed.

He studied the two of us for a moment; my dead face, Bella's shaking form, before nodding gravely and pulling back out into the road.

As soon as we were driving, Bella rose her head from my neck for the first time. "Edward?" she sniffed, clinging on to my shirt as if her life depended on it. Her face was beat red – her eyes a watery mess of depression along with the black smudges of mascara that circled around them.

"I'm right here, Bee." I told her softly, rubbing a hand gently up and down her back.

She stared at me for a few moments with wide eyes before she suddenly bursted out crying again. I quickly pulled her to me, forcing her to bury her head into my chest as I attempted to hold her even closer than before.

"I'm right here." I repeated in a whisper.

Jazz glanced at me in the mirror with a weary, bewildered expression. "What the hell happened?" He mouthed nervously.

I shook my head and let out a painful sigh. I might as well tell him. I was just worried about how Bella would react when she heard me say it out loud. . .or about how I myself would react. "Her mom was killed." I half mouthed, half whispered.

His eyes grew wide. "What? How?"

I shut my eyes for a moment. "They set up a car bomb in Bella's Ferrari," I exhaled as if someone had punched me. "And Bella's mom was in it."

"Shit." Was all he mouthed. Because really, that's all there was to say.

This wasn't anything close to how it had been for Rosalie's dad. He had cancer – there was always the possibility that he would die at any time. In fact, it really had only been a matter of time before he did.

With Bella's mom? Polar opposite. She had been young, healthy, _happy_. No one, not even Bella or I, could have ever seen this coming. I wasn't sure the shock would ever leave me. I don't think it was possible.

He pulled into Bella's long driveway and turned off the car. The only sound was of Bella's sniffling.

"Do you need anything?" Jazz finally looked back at us and asked.

I shook my head solemnly. "I'll be with her for as long as she needs. Tell the others, okay?"

He gave me a sad smile and nodded. "Okay, I will." Right before I was about to open the door, he quickly stopped me. "Hey," he made me look him in the eyes before pausing. ". . .Are _you_ gonna be okay?"

I nodded. Which was a lie. But it didn't matter anyways.

My time had been three years ago. I had already had my chance to go through this alone. I didn't know Bella's mom very well at all, but that didn't matter. This time hit me even harder than the first, and the only thing I had on my mind was to be there for Bella.

Because I knew what it was like when no one was there for me.

With Bella's arms and legs still wrapped tightly around me, I unlocked the garage door – which Bella had taught me how to do a while ago – and stepped inside the house. I only wasted a second of time to slide off my own shoes before I was making my way upstairs.

"Laurent!" I hollered loudly as I stepped into her bedroom.

Seconds later he appeared with a curious look on his face. "Mr. Edward?" he tilted his head to the side, "You called?" His confused stare fell on Bella who hadn't even took the time to process the fact that we were in her house.

She refused to move her head from my chest. She refused to let anyone see her cry.

"Charlie will explain when he gets home," I noted as I carefully sat down on the edge of the bed and began removing Bella's shoes without disrupting her. I couldn't handle repeating what I had to Jasper. I had been right – the words were too painful to actually confirm out loud.

He nodded with a weary expression. "You needed something?"

"Yeah," I responded absentmindedly, "When he gets home, tell him I have Bella upstairs, okay?" He nodded. "And if anyone comes over and asks for Bella, tell them she's in her room."

"Yes, sir," he quickly nodded again. He paused, "Do you need anything else? Food, clothes. . .?"

I shook my head. "I'll let you know."

He took that as his cue to leave, bowing his head politely before exiting the room and shutting the door behind him on his way out. Once Bella knew we were alone, the crying really began. It didn't get louder; her chest heaved as silent sobs shook her chest.

"Shh, Bee," I cooed into her hair, rocking her back and forth. "Je vous ai," I cooed lovingly into her hair. "I've gotcha."

I gently scooted us back, lying us on the pillows on top of the covers. I sat up halfway, resting my head and back on her headboard as she adjusted herself in my arms. She remained straddling my lap as both hands fisted themselves tightly onto my shirt. She nuzzled her face into my chest as my arms encircled themselves tightly around her small body.

I wanted nothing more than to steal away the pain. To make it my own. I had gone through this once, combined with a hell of a lot of other heart fail. I knew I could easily handle this because I was used to feeling this way all the time.

The fact was, there was no way in hell Bella could handle this. She furiously began shaking her head as she let out another round of muffled cries. I pressed my lips to the top of her head and kept them there.

I let her cry. I let her tears stain my shirt. I held her as comfortably as I could. I rubbed her back. I did everything I could to stop the torture from consuming her.

When she looked up at me through her wide, wet brown eyes, my heart literally sank. And then broke. Not just broke, it shattered. She stared at me for a long moment as she sniffed loudly. "E-Edward," she managed to rasp out, "Promise me," her voice cracked a plea as she whispered. "Promise me you won't leave me," she began shaking once again. "P-promise you'll stay h-here?"

I squeezed her tighter. "I'm not going anywhere," I assured her softly as I kissed her lightly on the head once again.

I wasn't sure how much time past. It could have been minutes; it could have been hours. Her crying never ceased, and neither did my tight embrace around her. The room slowly began to darken as the sun set behind the clouds.

Gently rocking her back and forth as her sniffles made up the only sounds in the room, I prayed this would be the worst of our problems for a long, _long_ time.

Suddenly, there was a soft knock on the door. I waited for a few moments as Bella stiffened in my arms. "Come in," I finally said hesitantly.

Charlie slowly entered the room with a grim expression on his face. He wasn't crying at the moment, which caused me the first sigh of relief in a long time. His eyes were bloodshot though, and rimmed with red. "Edward," he barely nodded.

I opened my mouth to say something but stopped. How was I suppose to tell him that it was my fault the love of his life was dead? I know if someone told that to _me_, I wouldn't want them alive.

I gulped. "I'm so sorry, Charlie." It was barely audible even to my ears.

He looked down at his feet as he slowly approached the bed. There was a long pause before he let out a shaky sigh. "Shit happens, right?" He chuckled humorlessly. He looked up at me and held my gaze. He had the same brown eyes as Bella did. The realization of this normally would have made me smile.

Unfortunately, nothing about this was _normal_.

"Do you, uh," he paused, "think I could maybe have a, um, moment with Bells?"

"Of course," I quickly responded, unwillingly releasing my hold on her fragile body. I leaned down, pulling her away from my chest enough so that I could press my lips to her warm, wet cheek.

He walked over to the bed and exchanged spots with me. Before he crawled onto the bed, he turned to me. "You can go downstairs and get some food. Take a shower. Get some new clothes. Whatever you need," he let me know. "Just make yourself at home."

"Yes, sir," I nodded sharply.

I turned around to walk out of the room. I placed my hand on the door knob, about to turn it. "Edward?" He quickly added. I spun myself around to face him once again. He paused for a few moments before his hard face softened. "Do you think you could maybe stay here tonight. . .? For Bella?"

I was going to anyways, but it was a surprising relief to be asked for once. "Of course, Charlie."

"Thanks, kid," he tried to muster a smile but it turned out becoming more of a grimace.

He finally met Bella at the center of her large bed. "Daddy," she whimpered as she immediately attached herself to him. I wanted to look away, but I had already seen too much.

"I'm right here, kiddo," he whispered to her as his arms replaced mine.

What I was witnessing was more horrible than possibly imaginable. I was watching a family die before my eyes; one which was destroyed. A _good_ family. These people were good to the core: Bella, Charlie, and. . .Renee. They deserved happiness. All of them.

But it was too late.

I had already consumed them with my poison.

_I_ had crumpled that happiness right before my eyes and didn't even realize it.

What was I doing here? I didn't belong here. I shouldn't have been alive. I should have taken her mom's place in that damn car so that _three_ happy people could be apart of the loving embrace before my eyes. I didn't deserve any of this.

In fact, I should have just died long ago. Or maybe I should have never even been born. Because then, the lives and freedom of many people would still remain intact. My mom would be alive. Carlisle wouldn't have to hide. Everyone who knew Renee wouldn't have to remorse. Renee would be alive. Bella would be safe. My family would be safe.

I always knew I was putting everyone in danger by being even the slightest bit close to anyone. I always knew it, but never really grasped it. In any other circumstances, I would have left that house.

I would have let myself feel the pain so many people held because of me.

I couldn't do that now though. Now, I had to fix what I broke. As good as it would be for her if I left and never came back, I could never bring myself to leave her. If I left Bella, I'd truly be dead. And there wasn't an ounce of melodramatics in any of my statements.

Bella was the only thing that kept me here. _Alive_.

If I didn't have her. . .I wad dead. Literally.

What if your actions ended up ruining someone's life? How do you pay for what you've done? If paying for all of the pain I'd caused so many people in my lifetime meant forfeiting my own life, I would do it in a heartbeat.

I shut the door behind me and trudged myself down the stairs. I heard many different voices as I walked, and once I got to the main level, I was met by over twenty unfamiliar faces. All of them either friends or family members with sad, tearful expressions.

I was overwhelmed, tongue-tied, and terrified by what they would say. There was no comprehension left in me to speak, and the feeling of discomfort was strong as I realized this was the last place I belonged.

Not knowing where the Volvo was, I would have to deal with my black skinny jeans and plaid flannel shirt for the rest of the night. I didn't want anyone to strike up a conversation with me, so I remained as unseen as possible while I made my way to the kitchen.

Luckily, no one was in there at the moment. I opened the fridge, scoping through the leftovers they had in fancy silver bowls before I finally settled for spaghetti. I wasn't about to make Laurent wait on me so I took matters into my own hands and put it in the microwave like the big boy I was.

I sat down on a stool at the empty counter and ate in silence. I tried to push every thought out of my head for fear of releasing an angst-overload on myself like I normally did. If I didn't think about it, I didn't have to blame myself.

And as much as I hated blaming myself, it was a necessary part of my life when I was the fault behind many problems. Which was a problem itself.

Just then some girl stumbled into the kitchen. She looked around fourteen or fifteen. I wasn't gonna lie either – the prostitution look so _didn't_ do her justice. Really though, it didn't do anyone justice. She looked surprised to find someone in here and shot me an embarrassed look.

Not particularly fond of her flirty eyes, I went with the easiest indication of a dismissal and dropped my eyes to my bowl. No such luck. She walked over and sat in the stool next to me. I was too numb to tell her to fuck off, so I just sat there in silence some more.

"Just wanted to get some quiet, ya know?" she snapped her bubble gum. "It's boring being around people who cry all the time."

I pretended to ignore her rude comment and shoved a fork full of noodles into my mouth. This little Jessica-wannabe would not take a hint to my unpleasant, dead mood. Girls like her were what made me relieved that I had taken online classes throughout a majority of my junior high and high school years.

"I'm Brooke," she told me with a tone of importance to her voice.

I sighed. "Edward," I told her in defeat. Might as well get my mind on something else. Though I would hardly call humoring this little teen a good way to distract myself.

"Wow! I haven't heard that name ever! Where is it from? Your dad? Grandpa?" She exclaimed enthusiastically. Why the hell was she here? She didn't seem the slightest bit affected by the situation. Which pissed me off even more.

"Sure," I grimaced.

I could tell she was staring at me out of the corner of my eye and held back the urge to spin her chair violently in the other direction. She let out one of those loud, annoying, I-don't-give-a-fuck-about-this-shit sighs. "Ugh, I'm _so_ bored." she snapped her gum again.

I gritted my teeth together and restrained from swearing at her before I shoved some more noodles into my mouth. I had better places to be – better people to talk to.

Once again though, I just shrugged. For some reason, she did that freaky thing where freaky girls analyze every single body signal like it all meant something. "I know right?" _Don't hit her, do not hit her, keep your hands to yourself, don't hit her_.

"I mean, I was like about to go to the movies when my mom gets this retarded phone call telling her to come here." Since when was retard an adjective? Last time I checked, it was a serious mental disability. "So I'm totally like missing my date, and it's so gay." Once again, I wasn't aware of gay being an adjective. Last time _I_ checked, it was an orientation.

"So we come over here and everyone's crying, and I get that it's sad that this lady died, but come on! I don't even know the chick! I mean, she's my mom's friend and I've only met her and her daughter like once!" She threw her hands up in exasperation. "Total, bitch by the way. Ugh, I hate her." she added with an eye roll.

It was only appropriate that I was literally fuming in my seat. Before I could direct my razor sharp glare in her direction, she had the never to speak again. "So why are you here? Did your parents drag you here too?"

I slammed a fist down on the table, startling her. "Actually, I'm eighteen," I snapped, "And I would get into a lot of legal issues and shit for bashing your head into the wall, which I'm about a second away from doing."

"My mother, _who is dead_, actually did _not_ drag me here." I informed her acidly. "Bella, the 'total bitch', _daughter_ of 'the chick' who was just murdered happens to be my girlfriend." I could tell she wanted to say something to defend herself, but I wouldn't let her. "Call her a bitch ever again and I will end you."

I hastily got up off my stool, stormed over to the sink and threw my half-empty bowl into it. I had lost my apatite approximately a minute ago when the whore not only blew off a death like it was on a tacky clearance rack, but also insulted my girlfriend who was falling to pieces just floors above us.

"God, dude," she chuckled. "Be cool. Didn't mean to upset you."

Once I realized I had no where to go, I clenched my fists together and leaned against the fridge, facing away from her. If I had to look at her plastic, fake face one more time I'd probably spit. Which was a lot more mild than some of the things I had planned.

I was the bigger person. No matter how upset I was with her, _or_ myself, I remained still as I proceeded to ignore her. Beating up and assulting some junior high girl wasn't going to make me feel any better. It wasn't going to solve any problems. And it sure as hell wasn't going to bring Renee back.

I was just. . .done. Done with this life.

Broken was no longer an adjective I would be using to describe Bella. To break was to divide into parts violently. She was not in pieces. It was impossible to describe a human being as shattered. Pain would have worked, had it fully covered her actual feelings. Pain was so much of an understatement, it was almost laughable.

From experience, I knew how much emotional agony she was going through at the moment, and it made my heart ache. Misery and sorrow were terrible, terrible things. They _consumed_ you.

Bella had never been through anything like this before. Ever. Even after being captured by the Volturi and almost killed, she went back to life and was normal no more than twenty-four hours later. I knew that wouldn't be the case with this.

When my mom was killed, I was obviously devastated. It was more than that though. The fact _clung_ to me; staying with me and haunting my every thought. It took me over two years to finally get over it. And I still wasn't even completely over it yet. I never would be.

Bella's world was nothing like mine, and I knew better than anyone what hell it would be for her to adapt to this new loss. Coping over something like this was far from easy. She could pretend to be fine all she wanted but I'd see through her.

I _always_ saw through her.

Aro, Marcus, and Caius were getting it all wrong. Instead of slowly tearing apart and ruining my life, they were ripping up Bella's. I thought about that for a moment before realizing their motives. They knew by hurting Bella, they'd be killing me.

I wasn't sure how long I stood there, avoiding everything going on around me. At some point, Brooke had stomped out of the room. I vaguely heard people come and go through the door, and the sounds of crying coming from the crowded living room.

I didn't allow myself to listen to any of it.

Eventually, I felt a tap on my shoulder and a throat clear. I quickly spun around, meeting the eyes of Charlie. We looked at each other for a moment. I wasn't sure what he saw in my face, and I only could imagine the silent things he was thinking in that moment.

"She wants you," he told me with a sad smile. I nodded automatically, turning to exit the room. "Edward?" he asked before I stepped out. I turned around once again. He took a deep, long breath before letting out an exasperated sigh. "Take care of her for me."

"Of course." My voice cracked.

I wasted no time wandering back upstairs, not stopping for even a glance in anyone's direction. I found her as I left her – crumpled on the bed with her hair messily around her face. My heart lurched and I flinched when her eyes looked up to meet mine.

She was no longer crying, but I was positive that wouldn't last for long. She even cracked the smallest of smiles as I approached the bed. It wasn't without great effort.

"Hey, kiddo," I murmured softly as I crawled back on to the bed. "Come here," I opened my arms. She didn't hesitate to fit herself right into them. She rested her head on my chest as I rested my chin on the top of her head.

It was a long time before she spoke again, and I almost thought she had fallen asleep. "Edward?" she asked quietly.

"Hmm?"

She paused for a few moments as if hesitating her question. "How long did it take you?" she whispered.

I knew what she meant, and she knew I did as well. I considered lying for a moment before I realized that I couldn't lie to Bella. She deserved the truth. Always. But my answer was disturbing, and I knew if I told her, it would upset her.

There really was no happy middle here.

I sighed. "I don't know if I should tell you," I confessed honestly. She didn't say anything. I knew she wanted to hear it regardless. I sighed again. "After my mom's death. . .before I started acting normal again. . .was probably around the time you showed up."

I kicked myself eternally as soon as the words left my mouth. I heard her sharp intake of breath and prayed the tears wouldn't be coming again. I desperately searched for some reassurance.

"But hey," I quickly added, softly rubbing her back. "That's because I _didn't_ have you, remember? It's not like that anymore, Bee. We have each other. You _healed_ me. And I'll be damned if I don't do the same for you."

I was expecting everything_ but_ her next move. She tilted her face up to mine and cupped a hand around my cheek, pulling my face down to hers. I willingly granted her what she wanted, though bewildered at the same time. If I could only know what was going on in her head at that moment.

Her lips molded themselves into mine as she began adjusting herself. She hitched her leg over both of mine so that she was now straddling me. Her hands tangled and pulled at my hair as she kissed me.

I knew where this was going – where she _wanted _this to go. In any other circumstances, I'd be okay with it. I knew exactly what she was doing though, and it had to stop. I would know – I had made the mistake three years ago.

She gradually began moving her hands down to my chest and started fiddling with the buttons on my shirt. "Bella, stop," I said sternly, pulling away from her face. She didn't stop.

I knew exactly what she was thinking, because I had been in the exact same scenario. The only difference was, I didn't have someone who loved me there to make me stop. She may have _thought_ she needed this, but really, it was the last thing she did.

She refused to stop though, so I gently grabbed on to both of her hands and held them in mine. Her chest heaved as she stared at me through hurt eyes. Damn it, all I was trying to do was be responsible.

"I'm sorry," I breathed. "But we can't." We weren't having sex on the same day of her mother's death _because_ of her mother's death. Not only was it messed up on so many different levels, but it was also wrong to take advantage of her when she wasn't even able to think straight.

Of course, I had to feel like shit for turning my girl down, but it was the right thing to do. I was positive of that.

Her eyes became watery. _Shit_. "Please?" she mouthed to me. "_Please_?"

I gravely shook my head. "_I love you_," I told her, realizing it was the first time I had said the words since Phoenix. "Which is why I won't do that to you. Bella, your emotional state is so tattered right now, you wouldn't be able to handle it. Trust me. Don't break yourself any further." Like I did.

She looked back at me for a long moment as I watched beads of water drip down her cheeks. Instead of saying anything, she just nodded sadly before ducking her head below mine and resting it on my chest.

I held onto her as I laid us both down, pulling the covers over us. Once we were settled, I got her into the securest position of comfort I could think of and held her there, refusing to let go for even the shortest second.

Sleep would be impossible for me. I was absolutely sure of that.

As I felt her tremble in my arms and wetness leak on to my chest once again, time slowly passed before she let the overwhelming exhaustion take over her mind and body.

Bella had been broken before. So had I. We _all_ had. We had gotten through it though. We had been fine.

I honestly didn't see how that was possible this time.

What if this truly shattered us all?

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**A/N: **I need an aspirin. -cracks knuckles- Gah, there's only so much heart fail I can take! If you don't believe me when I say I had trouble writing this chapter, I highly suggest you go back and read through it again. It killed me.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Superman (It's Not Easy) - Five For Fighting

_So I've always adored this song. Always. And I'm positive many of you have heard it beofore (if you haven't of course, go listen to it now). So this song choice was directed purely for the sake of EPOV. Like most of you already know, Mr. Cullen's going through some tough shit at the moment. So I figured this song amplified that even more than the fine print itself._

* * *

**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_je vous ai_ - "I have you"

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**Reviews are. . .ehh, I got nothing. They're wonderful, okay? Fucking fantastic, in the words of Edward.  
Ah, here we go: Reviews are better than Edward's wide vocabulary of adjective similies. (:**


	21. LaisseMoi Aller

******Happy Monday, everyone! :D**

Chapter 21 – FINALLY.  
I would have posted it sooner, and I'm really sorry about that since you guys all kicked-ass on the reviews, but with everything crazy going on in my life, it just didn't work out that way.  
But, here it is now, awaiting and ready for you to read.  
Happy late Easter, btw. Hope everyone's holidays were wonderful!

**Okay, so a lot of you have asked me how long this story's gonna be.  
Well, here's your answer: I'm not sure.  
I mean, sure, I do have a pretty good idea, but I'm not pin-pointing it or anything just yet.  
Since I don't complete my whole stories before posting them, obviously TR isn't done yet.  
But, my estimation would most likely be somewhere in the mid to late thirties.  
Deal?**

**Okay, that is all of my ramble.  
-J**

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**Bella - Laisse-Moi Aller**

I didn't know what was happening to me.

I didn't recognize my own feelings or even the expressions on the faces around me. I didn't know what to say, what to think, what to feel. I _didn't_ feel. If I let myself feel, it hurt. It hurt to think about, so I didn't. I didn't think at all. I was like a robot.

I didn't know what to do.

I thought it'd be easier after that first night. I had cried myself to sleep, crying until I had no water left to produce my tears. I thought I'd be able to grasp and get used to the idea, but I hadn't.

I couldn't.

But I knew I'd get through this. Eventually. I had people who loved me who could help me. I reminded myself over and over that I wasn't the only one to lose a parent. Emmett had when he was four. Alice had never known hers. Edward had when he was thirteen. Rosalie had a few weeks ago.

The thing was, I was a sheltered child. I always had been.

The worse thing in my life that had ever happened to me before this was when my puppy died when I was ten. I had it for a week. For that to be such a traumatic experience to me seemed like the most insane concept when I thought about it.

Before the last few months had happened, I didn't know what _pain_ was. The word wasn't familiar to me. At least, the meaning wasn't. I had what I wanted. I was spoiled. I rolled with it because it was who I was and what I had.

Looking back on all of that now, I somehow wished I would have been prepared for this. I wished that sometime along the lines of my young life there had been an event that changed and matured me.

It was only a matter of time before I grew up and I knew that. I was only eighteen though. I wanted more time to be a reckless teenager, like every other normal girl on the planet.

I didn't want events like this to have to somber my way of life permanently.

I wanted an easier path to maturity than this. I didn't want it to have to _be_ this way.

When I thought about Edward, I got scared, which was absolutely ridiculous. I wasn't scared for what he placed upon me, because I had asked for it. _Wanted_ it even, so that I could have him and his company. I knew I was risking everything by being in love with him. That's not was scared me though.

What scared me was realizing how he felt all of the time. I never really understood his constant pain, because how could I? I'd been in a bubble. A safe, easy bubble.

I thought about what happened recently: my mother was murdered. Like his. The feeling that knowledge brought was utterly unbearable and the heart fail I was suffering was imaginable. That was only part of what he felt though.

I had to factor in the other things he felt as well. Like never having met his father for basically his whole life. For never having a _family_. For believing himself to be responsible for everything bad that went on around him.

I knew him well enough to know that sometimes, he hated himself _so_ much that he truly didn't believe he deserved to live.

That was beyond the level of intensity I was suffering, and that's how he felt _all_ the time.

Having that insight only made things worse for me. Now that I knew what he felt like inside, not only did I want to _be_ comforted, but I wanted to comfort _him_ as well. I didn't have it in me at the moment though, and that killed me to think of how much worse he was suffering inside than I was.

I wanted to let him know I was okay; that I was a strong girl and that I could handle this. I couldn't tell him that though unless I truly believed it myself. I didn't. I tried, but I just couldn't.

The point was, I would make it through this. Worse things could have happened. Life went on.

The wake was hard, but I managed. Edward looked stunning in a suit; something I never thought I'd see on him which thankfully allowed me a smile for the first time that day. Rose, Al, Jazz, and Em all went to support me as well.

It had been a closed casket, purely because of how she had died. Generally when someone's blown up, they don't stay in one piece. I held back more tears just thinking about it. The amount of strain I was putting into keeping myself from crying was beginning to become unbearable.

I avoided talking, mainly because I was afraid if I talked, the crying would start again. I hugged everyone who attended and approached me, but stayed next to Edward like a leech the entire evening. When Charlie made a strong speech about what an amazing woman she had been, I had wanted to leave the room.

Edward didn't let me though. Instead, he wrapped an arm tightly around me, squeezing me into his side as his mere presence soothed me from yet another breakdown.

As I walked out to Charlie's car with Edward and him on each side of me, not only did I feel extremely safe and sheltered, but also as if the worse part was over. None of the three of us said a word as we got into the car. Edward helped me into the backseat before sliding closely next to me.

He hadn't let me out of his sight for a moment since the whole thing had happened, and I knew he wouldn't be letting up on his protection anytime soon. Not that he always could protect me. The fact that I knew he was trying his absolute hardest though was comfort enough.

He even humored me by calling Carlisle the other night. I knew it had been hard for him, and it had been one long phone call, but I wanted him to talk to his dad again. He told him what had happened. Carlisle's reaction had been shocked, just like everyone else's. He had come to the same conclusion I had: Tell Charlie.

"Uh, yeah, you can stay here again tonight, Edward." Charlie rubbed his eyes exhaustedly as we pulled into the driveway.

Edward nodded. "Thanks, Charlie."

I loved my dad more than words could describe. He knew how much Edward meant to me, and how much I needed his support. The fact that he was allowing Edward to be there with me to cater to all of my needs was a true sign of his devotion to me. Edward knew it too.

After we went upstairs and Edward helped me out of my ridiculously elaborate black dress, I changed into one of his t-shirts and a pair of flannel short shorts. I got the bed ready as he changed out of his suit and into some sweats.

"We're gonna tell him," he said quietly, surprising me.

I paused what I was doing for a moment, looking up at him. This was new. "What?"

"You're right," he sighed. "We have to tell Charlie about all of this. . .Besides, there's really no way to avoid it now, I mean, once they start trying to find out who did it. . ."

"What did you say?"

He looked confused. "Uh, once they start tryi–"

I shook my head. "The other part."

"You're right?"

Despite the dead energy inside me, I was able to crack a smile. He noticed it wasn't forced for once and his eyes lit up for a moment before he playfully narrowed them. "You heard me," he repeated with a hallow grin, "Don't get use to it, Bee."

I rolled my eyes before I sank back into my depression. Regardless of how short it had been, it was nice to have little uplifting moments like those. "Not now though," I told him quietly, folding my arms against my chest. "Not yet."

"Yeah, I know," he responded. "But we have to soon." There was a long pause. "Before something else happens. . ." he let that statement hang in the air.

"Because it will." I breathed. All he could do was nod. "They'll never stop."

It was hard to see a future for myself, as much as that killed me to admit. I felt oddly defeated for the first time in my life. Weighed down in a way even. Because even if we did involve Charlie, I had this strange feeling that things wouldn't get any better.

In fact, my gut was telling me they would only get worse.

I refused to let myself be sucked in to the negativity my over-worked hormones were creating. I would be fine after a while, and everything would soon be back to normal, I promised. Well, as normal as they had been before. . .

If anything about this was considered normal.

The numbness would go away. I had to believe it would, even if it may have seemed impossible at the time. Moving on may have been the hardest option for me, but it was the best and the right option. It had to be done.

I had to be strong for everyone. For Charlie. For Edward. For once in my life, I had to grow up and face the cruelty of the world I was just now discovering.

**Edward**

Just as I predicted, I got little to no sleep the following few nights. I held Bella as she slept, and she would never wake up until past eleven. Whether it was because she was really that exhausted or she just didn't want to get up, I wasn't sure.

Whenever she woke up, she didn't say anything and she looked awful. Absolutely dreadful. Not in the sense of like ugly or anything, just drained. Totally, completely drained. Her eyes were dead. Her expression was dead. Her _face_ was dead. On the bright side though, she wasn't crying as much anymore.

If you could even call that a bright side.

Laurent came in and brought us breakfast. She didn't eat any of it. To be honest though, I barely touched mine either. At eleven, Charlie came in. In a monotone voice void of emotion, he gave us the schedule for the next couple of days.

The first and only funeral I had ever been to was my mother's. Having less than pleasant memories only, I was extremely afraid of what my reaction would be for Renee's. Knowing that it was my fault we were there in the first place, I was guessing it could only be bad.

But I would go no matter what, because she needed me. It was really that simple.

We sat in bed together the whole morning and well into the afternoon. Very few words were exchanged. Not from lack of conversation, but for the sake of her well-being and mental-state. I knew she was still trying to grasp everything that had just happened in the last twenty-four hours.

I hadn't been expecting them at all, but around two the rest of the crew appeared at the house, a few hours before the funeral. They each came upstairs, one at a time, to give their sincere remorse and comfort.

Jasper had been first. Good old Jazz. He had brought her a bouquet of white roses already in a vase and placed them on her night stand, earning a wide, teary-eyed smile from her. Dude always knew what the ladies liked when it came to mushy shit. Why hadn't _I_ thought of flowers?

Well, I suppose there really hadn't been the right time to go and get them. . .

He had sat on the bed with us for ten minutes, giving her cheerful pep talks of reassurance along with the occasional 'I'm so sorry' and also the repeated 'You have all of us. We're here for you. Always.' After a tight hug, in came Emmett.

Emmett was carrying a large, stuffed teddy-bear with a warm smile as he engulfed Bella in a tight embrace. Alice did the same, adding to the bouquet Jazz had already began.

I don't think I would ever quite understand the bond between Bella and Rosalie. After Bella had found Rose out in the rain that one day, things changed between them. So when Rosalie silently crawled up on the bed and held Bella as the crying began again between the two, I took it as my opportunity to freshen up in the bathroom.

On retrospect, once I began thinking about it, it made a lot of sense. It made sense because it was both understandable and relateable. Rosalie had recently lost her father, so she knew better than anyone what it felt like.

Ten minutes later when I walked back into the room, she was whispering something into Bella's ear as a small smile filtered at Bella's lips.

With one last long hug, Rose waved goodbye to both of us and left the room. Assuming she just wanted to stay in bed some more, I began getting back on the bed before she stopped me.

"No," she shook her head. "I need to walk around. Shower. Get ready."

Hesitantly, I nodded and crawled back off. Was she going to be okay? She slowly got off, walking over to my side with a forced smile and fake bright eyes. I would see a real smile soon, I promised myself. In fact, I'd get her to smile a real smile.

She stood on her tip-toes, leaning up to me for a kiss. I gladly granted her that wish, ducking my head down to meet her face as I wrapped my arms around her waist. "Love you," she breathed as she pulled away.

"You too," I attempted to smile. "Love you too, Bee." It felt so good to say. Regardless of the shitty situation.

We walked downstairs, hand in hand. I had been thinking a lot lately – while she had been asleep – about what we were going to do. I'm not sure why it was just coming to my attention now, but I realized that just living an existence of hiding all of the time wasn't going to solve anything.

Besides, it was kind of crucial to involve him now. He would basically be _forced_ to be involved. I mean, they still had to do all kinds of testings and autopsies about the bomb in the car and who had done it. Of course, I already knew.

Bella was right though, like she had been all along. It was unavoidable. Eventually, we had to tell Charlie. I didn't know when, and I didn't know how, but it had to be done. With all that was going on right now though, I knew it wasn't a good time yet.

_No_ time would really be a good time, but it had to be soon. Not _that_ soon. I pictured the scenario in my head of me telling him that very moment and flinched.

_'Oh hey, Charlie. Sorry 'bout your wife. See, here's the thing – Bella and I are kinda being hunted. There's a mafia that wants us dead, and it just so happens that same mafia was the one responsible for Renee's death, ultimately making it my fault. Hope that's cool with you. Oh, and my name's not really Edward Masen. Just so you know.'_

Good conversation. I cringed at the results I didn't want to picture in my head. They involved quite a bit of both verbal and physical violence. . .

Yeah, I'd definitely be waiting a while to confront him. Enough time for me to sugar-coat the whole story up a bit.

Granted, that may have been impossible, but I liked to think it wasn't.

Bella continued to say little. To be honest though, I was just trying to avoid conversation and continue with the whole 'silent comforting' thing. I knew what our conversations would be if we would have any.

She would say it was her fault; I would say it was mine.

We would argue, we would fight. It wasn't a good time for that.

The truth was though, there was nothing to say.

I was trying not to think about what had happened, avoiding reality for as long as I possible could, just like I always did. It was a shitty thing to do and I was aware of that, I just couldn't let myself fall apart at a time like this as well.

Bella needed me.

It was a constant thought in my mind. One with a simple meaning that meant the world.

In a way, the funeral was a lot less stressful than the wake. I wore that damn suit again, feeling like a fool for thinking I was able to pull off the whole 'normal' thing.

Since all of the memorable speeches and what not had been made at the wake last night, part of a weight was lifted from the room. The part that was still there remained placed heavily on the shoulders of Bella and Charlie Swan.

Two people who deserved so much better than this.

After the funeral there was the burial. I had never seen so many people gathered for one thing in my life. The feeling I had in the pit of my stomach was horrible, knowing all of these people knew and loved Renee very dearly. Knowing it was my fault she was gone.

Bella could try and tell me otherwise as much as she wanted, but she could never convince me of the lies she wanted me to think. It wasn't anyone else's fault but mine.

They may have put the bomb in her car, but I was the reasoning behind it. It was _always_ because of me.

What scared the shit out of me was how trusting Bella _continued_ to be with me. She seemed to think that in my arms, she was always safe. As much as I wished it were true, I didn't want to give false hope to myself.

I gave it to her though. I played along in being the hero of this story when really, I was only the villain. I took away everything from her; everything good at least. If only I could take away the bad as well. . .

The next week flew by, which was actually quite surprising. Charlie took a temporary leave from work – in and out of the house from the office every day, drifting from place to place. Bella and I stayed at her home and did all of our school work there verses doing it at school.

I knew neither of us were ready to go back yet and really, it was just a ridiculous concept when you thought about everything that was so much more important going on around us.

Bella was the biggest trouper I had ever met. She surprised me by how sincerely well she was handling all of this. At least, that's how she came off as. Calm. I knew it wasn't completely true, but I also knew it wasn't completely bullshit.

She was genuinely trying to get through this. Now if only I could have said the same for myself. I wish I could have said I was trying; that I was making an actual effort to get through, but I honestly wasn't.

I needed to learn my lesson by feeling the pain. I wouldn't try and heal open wounds. I wanted to give myself a chance to take in the pain, because I knew I deserved it.

It was just how I was.

Al and the rest of them also drifted in and out of the house whenever opportunity struck. Everyone was just trying to get things back to normal. I wondered why I always used that word – normal. There wasn't an ounce of truth in my sentences when I attempted to place a word like that in them.

Nothing was normal anymore. In fact, nothing ever _was_. But we were trying. Some of us succeeding. I didn't allow myself to achieve happiness until I truly knew Bella did. I would be fine when she was.

Why did I keep lying to myself? I would never be fine.

My down attitude was probably taking years off of my life, but honestly, what did it matter anymore? It sometimes just got to the point where I literally couldn't handle it anymore. Like that evening.

I had over heard Charlie crying on the phone when I was walking past his study. I wasn't sure what exactly snapped inside of me, but I knew one thing for sure: I had to get out of there. I had to be by myself for a while. I just. . .it was just too overwhelming, all of the feelings swelling inside of me.

I had already been down that day before, but this just sank me. I was in the kitchen, the place where I was originally suppose to get a can of pop for Bella and I. I stood there, unsure of what my next move would be.

I felt my chest rise and fall as I sank my head and rubbed a hand stressfully over my eyes. I didn't know what was happening to me. I had to leave. Just for a little bit. I had to be away.

Minutes later, I heard Bella enter the room. Instead of asking why I hadn't brought up the pop, she asked what I knew she would.

"You haven't said a single word to me all day," she put her hands on her hips as she narrowed her eyes and stood in the doorway. "What's going on?"

I couldn't do this right now. I had to get out of here – away from here. Once again I had done a shitty thing by bottling up all of my feelings to the maximum capacity my emotional state would allow. I needed to be by myself for a while. I couldn't wrap my head around everything that had just happened. I was just as confused as to why I was breaking _now_.

"I have to go," I muttered angrily, attempting to move past her. She wouldn't move, crossing her arms and setting a cold glare on me.

"What the hell, Edward?" She asked as we locked eyes. "What the hell is going on?"

"I just need to be away, okay?" I told her, raising my voice loudly with aggression. Once again, I tried getting around her but she wouldn't budge. Instead, she began trying to wrap her arms around me or some shit.

"Laisse-moi aller," I hissed at her. For some reason, I thought French would get my point across better. Except for the fact that she didn't _speak _French may have been a problem. . .

As her arms continued to constrict around me, I began trying to escape. She normally had the power to comfort me, I had to give her that. But not this time. This time, it was all me. "Bella, let me _go_!" I gritted sternly through my teeth, trying to push her away. "Damn it, let go!"

She was relentless, so I snapped. When she tried circling her arms around me this time, I shoved her back with great force. She clung on to my arm with wide eyes as I did so, so I attempted pushing her away from me once again.

She stumbled back a few feet, grabbing on to the counter for support so she wouldn't fall.

I wasn't myself. In that moment, _I_ wasn't Edward Cullen. I was the monster. The one I had been keeping locked in me all of these years. This was nothing like the small fight we had had in Phoenix. This was different.

"I'm leaving," I snapped once again, "And you're more than okay with taking care of yourself and being on your fucking own for a little while." My voice was like venom, and it wouldn't stop.

This was worse.

I just had to get out of there before I really hurt her.

I had to find a way to save her from the Volturi, but first, I had to find a way to save her from myself.

Her wide, brown eyes became watery as she stared at me with hurt and anger. When I tried getting around her for the _hundredth _time, her hand flew out and landed straight across my cheek in one swift motion.

The whole left side of my face radiated with pain for a few moments as I stepped back in shock, letting the tingles on my cheek bring me back to reality. Her chest rose and fell in fury as hell found her eyes.

We stared at each other for a long moment in silence. I didn't know what to say; I didn't know what I _could_ say. So I said nothing.

Instead, I stumbled back a few feet in shock until my back found the wall. I let myself sink down to the floor as I crossed my arms over my knees and buried my face in them. I couldn't stand to see the look she was giving me.

It wasn't the sharp anger in her eyes that made my heart clench. It wasn't even the unshed tears that still remained in them either. It was the way she looked at me, _with love_; with understanding and comfort and caring and every I _didn't deserve_.

Most importantly, she looked at me through eyes that saw straight through me. She knew exactly what I was feeling – something no one should _ever_ have to experience. Because the only way she would have known the feeling I had in my chest would be if she had ever had that same feeling herself before.

I furiously began blinking back the moisture in my eyes. It was mortifying enough that she had already seen me cry before. I couldn't hold back my emotions though, and I broke down.

The fact that I had basically just physically assaulted Bella, the person I cared about most in this horrifying world who was already dealing with way too much shit, wasn't helping matters any. I really wouldn't have blamed her if she let me sit in my misery.

Misery loves its company. Sometimes though, misery doesn't deserve it.

I felt like shit. No, that wasn't even it. Because feeling like shit would be better than how I felt in that moment. I felt. . .nothing. Empty. Hallow even. And that was the feeling that scared the hell out of me.

I shut my eyes and let my tears fall into my folded arms. Ridiculous. Absolutely fucking ridiculous. What was I doing? Guys didn't cry. At least, I was arrogant enough to believe that was true.

I had to have been a pretty big douchebag to think I could just get away with getting up and leaving. I mean what the hell? Where was the maturity I always seemed to hold for myself? If I left, what good would that do anybody?

Sure, I wanted to. But that was only because I wanted to pull my dark forces away from Bella. Obviously that was impossible though, because with me here or not, the Volturi would still target her.

And if I left, what good would that do Bella? None. Absolutely none.

I really wish I would have figured all of that out, I don't know, like five minutes ago. Before I exploded at her. I hated myself. How was yelling at her a good idea? Especially now. Her mental state was already fragile.

And I had also pushed her.

What. The. Hell?

I didn't know what was wrong with me. Damn it, why couldn't I ever be _fixed_? I was sick of this half-ass stuff. Every time I'd think for just a short second I was normal, the harshness of reality would knock me down.

I was only doing what everyone told me to do: always hoping.

I knew there had been a reason I quit believing in that bullshit.

I didn't really notice I was beginning to seriously cry until I felt a soft hand lightly caress my shoulder. I wasn't sure who it was, only because I couldn't believe that Bella was actually wishing to touch me at the moment. I wanted her to hate me. _I_ would have hated me.

I shook my head as I kept it buried in my arms, wet and exhausted as the hand moved from my shoulder to weave its fingers gently through my tangled, messy hair. My heart tugged at the familiarity of the loving current the hands brought to my being; all the love I didn't deserve.

Why wasn't she just letting me suffer?

"Bella," I croaked, refusing to look up. "You should find someone else who can make you feel better. . .'cause I sure as hell can't."

She didn't say anything. It's not like I was lying – it was the complete truth: I was a shitty person for her. She deserved better. It's not like I hadn't always known that though.

She was suddenly prying my face away from my arms that were still folded across my knees as I sat in a fetal position against the wall. I didn't allow myself to budge, not wanting her to see my tear-stained face.

My relentlessness and refusal to budge caused her to huff loudly in irritation. "Damn it, Edward," she growled. "I don't _want_ someone better, I want _you_."

She continued to pry at my locked statue position. "You said I healed you," she said breathlessly while tugging on my arms. "But I think you're wrong. So let me –" she paused for another moment as she pulled at my head once again. "Fix you. . .completely. . .this time. . ."

She was about to say more before I suddenly snapped my head up. She froze as she took in my pained expression. "_How_?" my voice was shaky. "_How_ are you going to fix me?" she didn't say anything as I stared at her. "See you _can't_. No one can. I'm _not fixable_." I let myself calm down before I let out a long sigh. "So don't try and convince me I am."

"Well shit then." she said loudly, settling for a spot next to me as she too rested her head against the back of the wall, folding her arms as well. "What the hell do you propose we do, Edward?"

I didn't say anything.

"God, see? This is your problem!" she told me angrily. "_Say_ something. _Do_ something. Just don't fucking give up. I mean look at me," she began, "It's been a week and I–"

I felt more hot tears stream down my cheeks as my hand shook slightly. "Damn it, you're not the only one who's ever lost someone, Bella!" I shouted. "Don't think you're the only one who's had to go through all this shit!"

I stared ahead though I could feel her intense stair as I continued to speak. "Don't you dare try and pretend this is your fault because we both know whose it really is."

"Edward–"

"No, Bella, _listen to me_." I ordered as I sniffed my nose. "I'm not like a normal person. It's not like I can just move on after shit like this happens."

"You can try–"

"_You didn't watch her die_!" I gritted loudly through my teeth as my whole body shook. She stared at me with wide eyes as we locked gazes. "You didn't. . .have to _feel_. . .eighteen years of guilt crash over you like a title wave. . ." I began furiously rubbing at my eyes and nose.

My voice rose again. "You wanna know what the worst part is? It's that you think you know what I'm talking about, but you can't even comprehend an ounce of what I'm saying!"

"I know you're gonna be okay," she began to assure me, matching my loud tone.

"You think I can handle these things, but I just can't, Bella!" I stated furiously at her. "I'm _human_. There's only so much I can take, okay? I can't just. . .push everything out of my mind. There are just some things that don't leave you."

"Edward!" her voice echoed from the walls as it cracked in hysteria. "You're going to be okay; _we're_ going to be okay!"

"And how do you _know_ that, Bee?" I half groaned, half yelled. "How the hell are you so sure of that?"

"Because," she suddenly dropped her voice until it was only a soft whisper. Her eyes stayed locked with mine as a single tear rolled down her soft cheek. "You promised me we would be."

I didn't say anything. Without warning she was crawling into my arms. She wiggled her way into my lap, hitching a leg on each side of my body as her back rested on my thighs and her hands sat on my chest.

She didn't say anything else; she just stared at me. A long, immeasurable moment passed by before she was suddenly ducking her head down, tucking it below my chin as she nuzzled herself comfortably against me.

Another long moment went by.

"You promised me," she reminded in a faint whisper.

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**A/N: **Alright, so I'm positive you all hate me. Shit, that was like, what, three angsty chapters in a row? And not just angsty. VERY angsty. I apologize sincerely, just so you know, and I promise the next chapter will be semi-happier. Don't worry, Bee's handling herself. She's fine. Edward...well, you know Edward. He's...you know. Yeah. ANYWAYS. Sorry if you hate me for this chapter! I warned there'd be some heavy thoughts placed upon the characters!

One more thing I know I should address: They will tell Charlie. Eventually. I promise. So just be patient? They will tell him soon.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Give Me a Sign - Breaking Benjamin

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**French Translation: **_Laisse-moi aller_- "let me go"

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**Reviews are better than Edward in a suit. Leave one!**


	22. Émeute Émotionnelle

**Majory apologies go out to everyone who didn't get a review reply back from me for Chapter 21.  
I assure you I am most definitely NOT ignoring your amazingly kind words, I've simply just been under an extreme amount of stress lately.  
So enough with the excuses.  
Long story short, I posted this chapter on my way out the door to school this morning to take my MCAs and promise that my first priority once I get home will be to reply to everyone who wrote me a review for the last chapter. And this chapter. (: Promise.**

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**Bella - Désordre Emotionnel**

I was a mess of emotions, or _désordre émotionnel_, as Edward so kindly put it. Whatever the hell that meant. Which really was only to expected. On top of being drained and feeling like someone had sucked all life out of me everyday, I also felt anxious for the next chapter of my life, guilty for what I _knew_ was my fault, and terrified Edward was going to break his promise.

I could see it in his eyes – he wanted to. He wanted to leave me to protect me, which was utterly ridiculous. If he left. . .I couldn't even imagine. I just couldn't. I wouldn't let myself believe for one moment that there was even a small possibility that he would.

But what if he did?

The question picked and ate at me as I mauled over the emptiness I already felt inside. I wasn't completely hallow, but I knew I would be if he left.

I wasn't completely convinced he wasn't going to try something, but I prayed with all that was left in me that he wouldn't.

Sometimes I wondered what he was really thinking. It may have appeared like he wanted to leave because he wanted to keep more bad things from happening to me, but what if that wasn't the real reason? What if it was _me_?

I thought about my behavior; thought about what a dead weight I had been around here lately. Maybe he was bored of me? I knew I would be. Maybe he was finally put up with my endless moping. I squeezed my eyes shut tighter as I kept my face tightly against his chest.

I was trying. _So_ _hard_. I wanted to be happy again – to get over this as fast as possible, but I couldn't. I just wouldn't let myself for some reason.

He was completely right to accuse me of being selfish. _He_ had gone through this too. If I were him, I'd be sick and tired of my self pity as well. . .but, this was _my mom_ we were talking about.

My eyes became watery at the thought. I couldn't tell if Edward was crying anymore or not because I couldn't see his face.

Seeing Edward cry had shaken me up. I mean, I had never _really_ seen him cry before. I guess there was just something wrong with the thought of him breaking down like that. I was shocked at first when I had seen his wet, blood-shot green eyes, but quickly realized it wasn't that big of a surprise.

He was right – he was only human, and like every other human on the planet, he was bound to eventually reach his limits.

Much like myself, he had too much to handle at the moment, if not more. On top of trying to put on a brave face for my benefit, he still had to make sure we were safe, deal with his apparent guilt, and watch _me_ cry my eyes out every night.

That's why there wasn't an ounce of anger in me when I thought back to his violent behavior only minutes ago.

Sure I had been stunned with him at first. Once he sank down to the floor though, I understood exactly what was going on. The emotions on his face were clear as day, breaking my heart as I had watched the visible pain through his eyes.

All I could hear was his heavy breathing. All I could see was his hair falling over his eyes, making them invisible to me. I wondered when the last time he had a haircut was; it was beginning to get long.

I brought back my head a few inches so that I could look at him while I was talking. "I'm trying, Edward. . ." I told him in desperation as my voice cracked. "I'll get better, I promise. . .Just, just give me more time maybe? . . .It's _killing me_. I–"

His loud, frustrated moan cut me off. "Bella _why_?" he asked, pleading. "Why are you making shit _worse_?"

"I don't underst–"

"I know every single part of you in and out," he told me, "Which is how I know what you're doing. Don't you dare blame yourself. I won't _let_ you. Why do you always have to underestimate my feelings for you? If you think for one second that I'm gonna walk out that door and never come back, just know I'd rather kill myself than do that to you."

I stared at him for a few moments before I let out a slightly relieved sigh. "Don't be so over dramatic." I'm not sure how I even managed an eye roll.

"You know with you, sometimes I worry it's the only way I'm able to get my point across." The smallest of grins twitched at the corners of his lips.

And just like that I knew we would be fine. I was positive. Even though it may not have been practical, times like these were needed to exchange what we were really feeling. I didn't even call it fighting.

Just a stress-overload breakage.

Which is exactly why I was completely content to remain in my comfortable position with him, too exhausted and mentally drained to move. He sensed this as well, once again moving his arms to hold me securely against his body.

"You know," I sighed against his chest, "Why you love me is beyond me."

He chuckled. "I was just thinking the same thing about you."

"Oh?"

"Yeah," I heard him smile. "Didn't I warn you not to?"

I shrugged. "And why on earth would I ever listen?" I playfully nuzzled my nose on his chest and I heard him let out another low laugh. "Now picture it in reverse. Would _you_ have listened?"

"Definitely." He answered without skipping a beat.

"_Bull_shit," I sang quietly. "If I remember correctly, I'm only the victim here. I _did_ listen to you. You fell in love with me first and when you told me, I only said it back for the sake of being polite."

I giggled for the first time in a long time as he flexed his arms around me, squeezing me tightly as he shook me playfully. "Uh-huh," he finally agreed with an eye roll. "I'm sure."

I yawned. "I love you," I smiled sheepishly as he brushed a piece of hair gently away from my face. He smiled genuinely but before he could say anymore, I quickly cut him off. "Don't get too happy. I was being polite, remember?"

As I snuggled myself further into his embrace, I felt my eye lids grow heavy and it wasn't long before they fell shut. I felt his lips press lightly to the top of my head. "Love you, Bee." he breathed.

The hum of his voice was enough of a lullaby itself to put me into a trance of peaceful serenity. It was the first time I had felt myself in days.

For once, I didn't have to cry myself to sleep that night.

Edward tried telling Charlie several times in the next week. Unfortunately, he was either interrupted by an important phone call from work, a relative calling to ask him how he was holding up, or Edward would just flat out lose his nerve.

By the time Charlie _would_ get off the phone or would be ready to sit down and talk, I could see it in Edward's eyes that he no longer believed it was the right time. Speaking of time, I was starting to worry we were running out of it.

I almost considered telling the man myself if I knew Edward wasn't so god damn touchy about the whole thing. I guess it _was_ his story to tell though. . .But still. Things were beginning to get ridiculous.

On the brighter side of things, I could feel Edward and I getting closer. I mean, I had already thought we were as close as two people could possibly be, but the past few weeks had proven me wrong.

I don't know what it was, honestly. Maybe it was because we were both finally realizing how to look at life, or maybe it was just because Edward was right, and that bonds only grew stronger after hardships.

Either way, I was getting over things a lot quicker than I had initially planned I would.

Edward was doing everything he possibly could to distract me; preventing me from having any time at all to dwell on all the negative things that had been happening lately. Sure I was still sad a majority of the time, but I was better. A lot better than I _had_ been.

Since it was now okay for Edward to basically live here with me – Charlie still hadn't objected once – it was safe to say that we had a lot more available. . .together time.

Let's just say, I didn't mind some of his methods of distraction.

He still wasn't having sex with me – which upset me greatly, though at the same time I suppose he was right in declaring I wasn't ready for that kind of emotion after still dealing with my mother's loss. Just because he wouldn't agree with _sex_ though, didn't mean he had any problems agreeing with anything in the ranges of second-base.

Let's just say, I had become quite skilled in the art of fellatio, and also discovered the magnificence that was Edward's tongue. Good times.

Sometimes though, even Edward couldn't keep the bad dreams away.

I was presented with constant reminders of Renee daily. Whenever I'd see some high-class woman shopping, my mom would take her place. Whenever I looked at a store in general, I thought about her. I thought back to the days when I was just starting to use make-up, and how she guided me through putting on mascara for the first time.

My mom had taught me everything I knew about life; she taught me about how to be a woman. She held me as I cried when my first boyfriend stood me up. She took me on extravagant trips with her in the summer, just for the sake of bonding. She did my hair – helped me pick out outfits for dates.

She was my best friend.

And nothing would _ever_ change that.

After over three weeks later, Edward and I were finally returning to school. Truth be told, I wanted to drop out. Badly. With everything going on lately, it was silly to waste my time sitting around in some class full of kids I didn't want to be around, learning things I didn't need to know. I never actually considered the idea though, because it would kill Charlie.

Charlie, as a matter of fact, was the one who suggested Edward and I start going back again. I compromised with him, making a deal that if I went to school, Edward could continue to stay at our house. As long as I promised to be responsible, that was. Even though Charlie knew asking was a lost cause, I still agreed anyways.

When asked about what Edward's parents thought about him never being at home, I quickly lied on how they were always busy working and never home anyways. He couldn't argue because that's exactly how things were for him.

I stood in front of my large vanity, curling my hair as I applied my make-up, very skillfully I might add. I had on a pair of black leggings with a light green sweater cut to hang just barely off my shoulders, revealing an eye full of my neck and collarbone, long enough to cover my ass. With matching jewelry and a headband, I threw on a pair of light green converse that also matched, tying together the whole outfit.

I felt like such a priss for taking so long on my appearance, but I wanted to feel beautiful and to look confident. On my first day back, I knew I would be receiving a lot of stares.

I wanted to make sure not a single person saw through my happy charade and into my broken, tattered, ugly insides. I had learned a long time ago that unless you really cared, you only saw the first layer of a person's emotional mask.

For example, whenever I was sad, no one ever knew – except Edward – because I wouldn't let anyone think for even the smallest moment that I was miserable. Even though I was.

When I explained this to Edward, all he did was give me this sad look and nod.

Going back to school was the last thing he wanted to do which easily showed on his face. Since I was going though, obviously he was too. Being the package deal we were and everything, we rarely left each other's side.

It sounded clingy, obsessive, and irritating if you thought about it, but that was the last thing it was. It was comforting, loving, and safe. My favorite feelings in the world.

I really lucked out when I found Edward who effortlessly gave me all three.

I now drove Charlie's car as a precaution ordered by him because he still was trying to find out more about the car bomb in my Ferrari. I felt awful about the fact that I knew who had done it and I hadn't told him yet. We were going to tell him though. Very soon.

Edward, familiar with the Volturi's behavior, told me they'd keep a low profile for a while, letting their recent damage sink in as deep as possible before trying something new. He also told me that since they were dealing with Charlie now, they had to be more careful.

I didn't even have it in me to feel relieved.

Flustered and overwhelmed, I pulled into the crowded parking lot. Edward got out quickly, meeting me around on my side as he immediately took my hand and held it tightly. I took a deep breath and we began walking toward the building.

I kept my head held high as Edward remained silently walking next to me. We entered through the main doors just as the first warning bell rang. I looked around me, suddenly feel extremely nervous as the sympathetic eyes of a hundred on-lookers fell onto me.

Knowing exactly how to calm me down, Edward leaned down, kissing me on the cheek and whispering into my ear, "I'm a lucky guy," he told me. "Have you seen how gorgeous my girlfriend looks?"

I grinned and even blushed a little. The word gorgeous sounded so amusing coming from Edward's mouth. "Well you should _see_ my boyfriend," I responded, waving a hand exasperatedly in the air with a smirk. "He's to _die_ for."

"Oh?" He raised an eyebrow. I actually let out a loud laugh and nodded quickly at him. His eyes sparkled as he took in my appearance once again, "So why are you so pretty looking today?"

"I gotta hot date," I told him, shrugging.

He threw his head back in laughter which was an extremely nice change to see. "Boy am _I_ jealous," he snickered. "Lord help that poor boy. . ."

He chuckled as I smacked his arm. Releasing my hand, he moved his arm so that it was comfortably around my waist.

Suddenly feeling so much better, I leaned into him with a smile plastered on my face. And surprisingly, only half of it was fake. "You can totally handle this shit," he told me under his breath as we entered our first class.

And I could.

With him, I knew I could.

All in all, the day went so much better than I thought it would. To be honest though, I don't know _what_ I had been expecting in the first place.

Second period I had gone to my locker, pleasantly surprised by the amount of cards, flowers, and sticky notes covering the entire thing. With a satisfied smile, Edward helped me gather them all up and stuff them in my back pack.

I didn't want to read them all now because it would ruin the moment. Besides, I knew I'd burst into tears if I did anyways.

In the third period, Mike, who I now was madly in love with, brought me a homemade cake. Not just homemade though – homemade by _Mike_. I almost died, I swear. The gooey, sticky frosting was in a mess of decoration as he had attempted to spell out "Stay strong, Hells Bells."

Gym had started out being a bitch – I hated basketball and my coordination skills refused to allow me the ability to run on the gym floor. I had fallen, twisting my ankle which sucked major ass. What didn't didn't suck? Edward giving me a piggyback ride to our next class.

The only downer of the whole day was Jacob. It was _always_ Jacob. It wasn't his usual sad glance in my direction though like normal. He knew something was up, and I knew he had been able to piece together enough to know that Renee's death was not just a coincidence.

With Edward on the same page as me, we very conveniently avoided him and his harassing questions I knew he was dying to ask.

Lunch was nice and peaceful. Everyone left Edward and I alone in our little table in the corner, giving me a break from the never-ending condolences from my fellow classmates. Jess and the rest of them weren't even offended when we chose not to sit with them. I guess she did know me after all.

As refreshing as school had been, it was still nice to get home. Not having seen Alice in a while, I dialed up her cell as Edward and I lounged in my kitchen for snacks. "Bella!" she sang when she answered.

"Hey, Al," I chuckled, grinning.

"What's up, dollface?" she asked in her usual chipper tone.

I shot a glance at Edward who was tossing grapes ten feet up in the air and catching them successfully in his mouth and rolled my eyes. "Yeah, listen, do you wanna come over for a movie night with me and Edward? Jazz too of course." I would have invited Rose and Em but apparently they had a _date_. I was too thrilled to care when they declined my request.

There was a long pause on the other end before she sigh hesitantly. "Yeah, Bee, that sounds great," she told me in a tone of remorse, "But, um, Jazzy and I were kind of already gonna go out to dinner. . ."

I frowned, pursing my lips, trying not to let her hear my disappointment. "Don't worry about it, Al, another night will be fine."

"Yes, definitely!" she quickly responded happily. "Well, see ya soon, lovely!"

I ended the call, placing my Blackberry down on the counter. "No go?" I glanced up at Edward who was giving me an apologetic expression before popping another grape into his mouth.

I shook my head sadly, crossing my arms and leaning against the counter in sad frustration. I let out a long, defeated sigh as I stared out the window, off into nothing. I felt my cheeks grow hot as my vision started to become blurry. I quickly blinked back the moisture before Edward would notice.

I guess I had been too late. With a soft expression crossing his face, he set down his bowl of grapes and walked over behind me. One of his arms constricted around my waist as the other wrapped around my chest and grasped a hand on my shoulder. I held onto his arms as he buried his face in my shoulder – his hair tickling at my ear.

"I feel pretty loved right now," I chuckled as he nuzzled his nose against my cheek. "I mean, you chose me over a bowl of grapes."

"And they were _good_ grapes," he quickly added. "So you _should_ feel loved."

Edward was too good for me. I didn't care what anyone said, and I'd argue it until everyone believed it was true. He had seen it; it had gone without saying that I had been crushed at the reminder that living a normal life was impossible – that going out on a Friday night wasn't something him and I could ever do. But he made me remember something important: As long as I had him, why did any of that other stuff matter?

"Oh, believe me I do," I grinned, spinning myself around in his arms. I attempted to stand on my tip-toes so I could reach his lips, but he was _so_ tall. My five foot self was nothing compared to his six-six.

He laughed at my flustered expression as I inclined my head up at him, pursing my lips. Before he could make fun of my height anymore, he quickly grabbed onto my legs and hoisted me up, setting me on the counter so that we were face to face.

I wasted no time pulling his face to mine. I sucked on his soft top lip as he took my bottom lip and did the same. Both my hands weaved themselves into his wild hair. My legs were spread slightly apart, hanging off the counter as he stood closely in between them.

I don't think I'd ever get used to the perfection of the feel of Edward's lips molding into mine. I moaned breathlessly into his mouth as his hands found their way to my breasts. I wrapped my legs around his waist so that our bodies would be closer. His hands worked their magic as our kisses became a little rougher. . .

We both froze at the sound of the front door opening. "Honey, I'm home," Charlie sang, just like he did everyday. Well, at least recently. I wondered if it was like a warning for me. For insistences _just_ like this particular one.

I quickly pushed Edward back, jumping gracefully off the counter – hissing at my ankle that appeared to be still injured – and straightened my clothing. Edward smirked at me as he walked over to the fridge, making it look like he was doing something as he ran a hand through his hair.

"In the kitchen!" I yelled in a late response.

No more than a few seconds later Charlie entered into the room with a knowing half-smile as he took in my rosy cheeks and swollen lips. I blushed, looking down at the floor as I gave him a quick hug and muttered a "Hey, Dad."

Edward turned around, grinning at me as I rolled my eyes at the new bowl of grapes he had acquired. "Evening, Charlie," he smiled happily, tossing a grape up before catching it in his mouth with an even wider smile.

He patted Edward on the back, "You'll go far with that, kid." Edward grinned, flashing me a crooked, smug smile as he did it again. Show off.

Charlie began heating himself up some food, sitting down at the counter – where I had just been shamelessly making out with my grape-catching boyfriend – and ate a hot bowl of tomato soup.

"Alright, Bells," he began, "I'll be here for another hour or so before I have to head back to headquarters. I'll most likely be there all night, so it'll just be you, Edward, and Laurent." The last part of his statement came out dry.

I nodded, "Sounds like a plan."

A moment of silence went by where the three of us said nothing. I shot a glance at Edward who had already been looking at me. Now was the perfect time to tell Charlie, I told him with my eyes.

I could see that he was considering the idea for real as he pursed his lips in thought. After a long, meaningful moment the carefree smile he had been wearing no more than minutes ago faltered into a slight frown as he shook his head.

"Not tonight," he mouthed. I sighed and nodded. I knew why he said no. It was too good of a night for it to be ruined. I mean, Edward had been laughing and smiling the most I had seen him in a long time. So had I too, I guess. I could see where he was coming from and understood his motives.

There was only so long we could avoid it though. . .

After dinner we did end up popping in a movie – which, you know, neither of us actually watched – and decided to call it a night shortly after.

I met Edward on my bed, getting onto it before crawling onto his chest.

I slid my hands under his shirt, slowly running them over his muscular chest. I felt the ripples below my fingers as I rubbed them up and down his warm skin. I was straddling his lap as he laid beneath me, letting his eyes fall shut and humming in approval at what I was doing.

"You know what I think?" I asked softly, never ceasing the movement of my hands. All I got was a muffled "hmmm?" and a lazy half-smile at his lips. I continued on, "I think our next trip should be to Paris."

The idea really kind of just hit me, so I decided to go with it.

As I knew they would, his eyes slowly perked open as they stared back at me with silent curiosity. I remained at ease with what I was doing, casually shrugging. "I thought Phoenix was fun. I realized that trips are the best way to give us a chance at a normal relationship, you know?"

He nodded in understandment, but the crease was still present on his forehead. I removed my hands from under his shirt, bringing them up to place on each cheek. He knew why I wanted to go. I could tell it in his eyes that he wanted to go too. Not so much as wanted. He _needed_ to go. Whether he admitted that to himself or not.

So instead of having to explain myself, I simply told him, "I really want to go with you." And because he was my other half, he understood exactly what I was saying.

I brought my face down to his, placing my lips gently over his. We shared a soft kiss before I decided it was time for bed. I rolled off of him, quickly curling up to his side the way we always slept when we were together. He'd encircle me in his arms, and I'd sleep without a worry. It's how it always worked.

Expecting the same thing, I nuzzled my face into his chest, slowly falling into a sleepy daze. He inhaled my hair like always, squeezing me just a little tighter every time I'd sigh comfortably into his chest. It didn't take long for the sleep to come.

My eyes flew open as Edward shot up with me on his chest, still holding me as he quickly clapped the lights on. I furiously blinked back the sleep in my eyes. There was no mistaking the sound I had just heard. Edward had heard it too.

It was a sound that caused everything in me to be awake and alert. And scared to death. I slowly rose my head up to see Edward's expression. His green eyes were darting everywhere in the room as he remained completely silent, listening for more sounds. His jaw was mashed in a hard line, and his nostrils flared.

"What was that?" I whispered, shaking.

But before he could answer, the loud, agonized scream sounded through the house once again. It sounded like someone was being tortured. The only other person in this house was Laurent, leading me to believe that his old age had finally caught up with him.

_Holy shit_.

What if he had a heart attack? Or a stroke? What if he was dying right now?

Before I could think twice about any of those questions, I leaped out of Edward's grasp, throwing myself across the room and flying out the door. "Bella!" He hissed loudly, quickly following behind me. "_Stop!_" He placed a hand on my shoulder to restrain me, but I shook it off immediately, trying to figure out where Laurent was.

"Come on," I urged desperately, "I think Laurent's hurt! He might be having a heart attack or something!" I didn't wait for his response.

I ran down the long staircase, listening for any possible signs of his location. "_Bella_," Edward repeated once again as we reached the bottom. This time he grabbed an arm. I gave him an irritated, confused expression. He looked around the dark room warily. "I have a really bad feeling about this."

Suddenly, there was another yell. Only this one was quieter and possibly even more strangled than the others. It was coming from the security room. Odd. Without thinking, I darted to the left, escaping his restraining arms.

I approached the unlocked door, carefully pushing it open and stepping inside. As soon as my eyes had time to take in the sight around me, I was staggering backwards in shock, running into Edward's chest. Before I could scream, or even gasp, his hand flew up as he placed it tightly over my mouth.

Every single security computer, camera, button, or machine was completely destroyed. Everything was violently smashed up; the hundred-thousands of dollars Charlie had spent installing everything was now gone. Ruined. That wasn't the only thing that caused my eyes to widen though.

Laurent was lying on the floor of the small room, crippled, broken, and bloody. Both hands were clutched to the red pool of blood on his chest around what looked like a massive butcher's knife. His eyes were wide open, but he wasn't moving. He wasn't breathing.

He wasn't alive.

Edward was a complete statue behind me. With horror-struck eyes and a mouth that wouldn't close, I slowly pivoted myself around to face him. "What's happening?" I mouthed in shock as I furiously blinked back the blurriness.

His expression frightened me. It was identical to the face he had given me weeks ago in that dark room when him and I had been so close to death. It was the look he gave me when the Volturi told us we were going to die.

A look that basically told me our chances of surviving _now_ were slim to none. Because in that moment, I knew exactly what was going on.

"They're still in the house," he breathed. Every inch of my body froze as a creek from upstairs confirmed his words. I glanced down at Laurent's lifeless form once again, and back to Edward's wide eyes.

"I've got to get you out of here," he told me in a barely audible, fierce whisper. "Now."

Wrapping an arm tightly around my waist while holding me close to his body in a protective way, he spun us around towards the door. I didn't even have time to glance back at Laurent's lifeless figure, too focused on making it out of this alive myself. Carefully stepping out into the hallway, we quietly began making our way to the closest door.

As we hurried through the house, I heard another noise. One that was much closer this time than the creek that had sounded from upstairs. One that was a hell of a lot more frightening as well.

The rushing of footsteps down the stairs.

It was one of those feelings you only heard about but never experienced first hand. The kind you read about in horror movies, the kind portrayed in the climatic parts of actions movies – the kind you refused to believe actually existed.

It left me feeling almost nauseated as my breathing became nothing more than shallow, uneasy gasps of air.

Wide-eyed, I gazed up at Edward. He had heard it too. His face had gone completely white as he stared back into my eyes with a heartbreakingly devastating expression of fear. _Fear_. It was Edward; Edward wasn't suppose to ever posses that look. He was the anchor out of the two of us – the rock. He knew how to handle things like this.

Last time, we had escaped them by luck. That was last time though.

This time, I had a sinking feeling we wouldn't be so lucky.

As I heard another creek from above us, I held my breath and froze, unable to move.

Petrified by what I knew was about to happen.

* * *

**-cracks knuckles- The Cliffy Queen has returned. -big, evil smile-**

**So on a happier note, I NEED TO UPDATE MY MUSIC COLLECTION. Send me all the recs you got, bbs. I need some new music!**

* * *

**CHAPTER SONG: **Hero/Heroine - Boys Like Girls

_I don't even give a damn if it's cliche. If you haven't heard it yet, you've been living under a rock. Favorite band, btw. Felt like sneeking in another one of their genius songs. AKA, one of the best songs ever written. Okay, I am finished with the rant._

* * *

**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_désordre émotionnel_ - "emotional riot"

* * *

**Reivews are almost as good as Edward's tongue. (;**


	23. Courir

**I'll keep this short because I don't really have much to say that I haven't already.  
I mean, you already know how much I appreciate each and everyone of you.**

**Thank you.**

**So, so much.**

**

* * *

****EPOV - Courir**

My first instinct was to scream.

To slam my fists against the wall, stomp loudly on the floor, and yell _'not again!'_

I wanted this to be one of those sick reality TV shows where they saw how much shit they could do to a person before finally just having the whole crew jump out and yell 'just kidding!' and everyone would laugh and hug at their stupidity.

Except this wasn't a reality TV show, this wasn't just for the pleasure of "viewers like you", it was just Bella and I, and the only people who would be jumping out to surprise us would be the people who wanted to jump out and kill us.

God damn it, where was the fucking _justice_? It wasn't fair. Didn't this _just_ happen less than a fucking _month_ ago?

As I heard the loud creek of the stairs, my eyes zoned in on Bella's panic-struck face. She looked up at me in sheer fear with the silent questioning of what our next action would be.

It was like we were trapped in some never ending horror movie. The kind where no matter how many times the victim would escape, they would always end up face to face with death over and over. I watched enough horror movies to know one thing: they weren't called 'the victim' without a reason. There were only so many times 'the victim' could escape.

But I couldn't just give up. I wasn't ready to die yet. Not _this_ time. I wanted more time.

Calculating the closest door possible as quick as I could, I began dragging us silently through the dark house, trying as hard as I possibly could not to let either one of us make a noise. As I held on tightly to Bella, I felt her quivering and holding in a terrified scream.

I listened for any sound that might indicate where they were. For all I knew, one of them could have been standing around the corner, or even lurking behind us. I froze at the thought, whipping my head back to check.

I let out a silent, relieved sigh when I found no one behind us.

From this point on, everything depended solely on luck. Which was pretty fucking nerve-wracking. With each step we took, we were in danger. There was no win-win here. It's not like I could just poof us out with my magic fairy powers.

Where the fuck was Harry Potter when you needed him?

At first I decided that going out the garage would be the best option. Then, I realized it wouldn't. The garage was most likely how they got into the damn house in the first place; who was to say someone wasn't still in there?

"Edward," I barely heard Bella breathe. I glanced down at her wide eyes. "He found us."

My stomach sank and legs became week as I slowly directed my gaze to the space Bella had been staring at. Sure enough, a dark shadow of a figure stood at the entrance of the kitchen door. Could he see us? It was so dark, _I_ could barely see him. The only reason I was able to get around so easily was because I knew this house like I knew the back of my hand.

I remained absolutely silent as I inched us extremely slow to the door leading out to her backyard. We were only feet away. . .we were _almost_ there. . .

Then the figure spoke.

"In the kitchen," he breathed into some sort of cell phone or something. _Shit_, was all I could think. He _did_ find us. And there were more than one.

The way I saw it, I had two options. The first was to stand there like a sitting duck, helpless and void of any hopes to escape and practically invite death out of defeat and exhaustion from all this avoidance.

Second, was to just get the fuck outta that house and hope to not get shot in the process. I mean, option one's outcome would be the same no matter what: death. Option two would most likely result in death as well, but there _was_ that small chance of escape. . .

Option two it was.

"In about ten seconds, you sprint to that door and run. _Courir_. Don't stop, just run." I instructed almost silently into her ear. "I'll be right behind you, I promise." I said that only because I was preventing her from arguing.

She nodded as I inched us closer. I found it incredibly odd that whoever standing in the doorway wasn't attacking us. Yes, something was definitely up. . .I suddenly felt uneasy about splitting up, but it was too late.

Bella had already counted to ten in her head and before I could stop her, she was darting to the door. I held my breath as I watched her swing open the door and disappear successfully from my view.

Another figure suddenly appeared in the doorway, next to the first. He also stood in the doorway, neither coming in my direction. I wondered if I should do the same thing Bella had just done but decided against it. If I moved now, I had a bad feeling their stillness wouldn't last. . .

"The girl escaped out the back," a familiar voice said quietly to the other. Marcus.

"Not a problem," Aro replied coolly, "Demetri was waiting out back anyways." _Fuck_. He paused for a few moments and I knew that his eyes were on me. "Well, what are we waiting for? Why are you just standing here?"

I heard Marcus mutter something into his ear and as my eyes finally began adjusting to the darkness, saw their gazes fall on something behind me. I chanced a quick glance behind on the island I was leaning against. My eyes zeroed in on what theirs were on. A gun.

I wasn't sure who's it was or how it got there, but it was there. I quickly snatched it, holding it in my shaking hands as I pointed it at the both of them. I had never held a gun before in my life, and I suddenly felt oddly powerful. . .what would happen if I flicked the trigger? Would it feel as good as I thought it would?

My thoughts were cut off short by a blood-curling scream that came from outside; the scream of a girl I knew better than myself. Bella.

Without thinking what I was doing, I was suddenly sprinting my way towards the door she had gone out. Hand on the knob, ready to swing it open, I was suddenly stopped.

"Move and I'll shoot you," Aro said acidly. I froze, gun still in my hand as I slowly turned myself to face them once again.

"Shoot me and I'll shoot you," I countered. "Is taking my life really worth one of your own?"

My question entitled me just enough leeway to escape soundlessly out the door as they pondered in a moment of hesitation.

I was suddenly in Bella's backyard, looking frantically around for any signs of where she had either gone or been taken. I prayed to God that scream had meant nothing. I knew Aro and Caius would be right behind me, and if what they said was true, Demetri was due as well.

My phone suddenly buzzed in my pocket. I didn't have time to contemplate whether answering it was a good idea or not, so I acted on instinct and pulled it out of my pocket. Bella's name flashed on the screen. I quickly flipped it open.

Before I could even say a word, she was giving me directions. "Get your ass to the neighbor's yard – the one's with the pool. You have to jump the fence, and then meet me at the corner." I didn't waste time I didn't have responding. Shoving my phone back into my pocket, I kept my hand gripped tightly on to the gun as I followed Bella's instructions.

I heard the door I had gone out open and the sound of their running behind me. I didn't chance a look back, keeping my eyes focused on where I was going. I ran so hard I felt like my lungs were on fire.

I ran to the neighbor's backyard like she had told me, easily jumped over the fence in one attempt, and continued my quest to make it to the corner alive. I was a little concerned about what the plan was once we actually got to the corner. . .

Suddenly I was being shot at. I pushed my legs to go faster, darting around trees and flower beds as I remained running at full-fucking-speed. I was positive I would have been putting Olympic medalists to shame in that moment.

Finally, I made it to the corner. Bella was no where insight though, and I suddenly became nervous again. . .Until a small, black car came peeling around the corner, screeching to barely a stop as the passenger door flew open. "Get in!" she shouted breathlessly.

I almost smiled. Almost. Until I heard more gunshots. I leaped into the car and she was speeding off before I even had time to close the door. "What the hell is going on?" she yelled as soon as I buckled. With her driving, I'd need it.

"I don't _know_," I groaned loudly. "How the hell did they get into your house in the first place?"

She turned to me for a second, long enough for me to see the worry and uncertainty in her eyes. "Edward. . ." she began, lowering her voice. "You don't understand. Breaking into my house. . .it's impossible. I don't. . .I mean, if they can manage _that_. . .I think we're fucked."

She was driving fast enough so that even if they did run back to their fancy little Mercedes, there was enough distance between us. A moment of silence passed. She veered a sharp right and I clung on to my seat. "Your scream scared the shit outta me," I told her.

"Yeah? The gunshots had me on edge too." she responded acidly, clearly very frustrated with the current situation. I didn't even bother to try and calm her down. What was the use?

"Why did you scream anyways?" I asked.

"This huge-ass guy came out of no where and jumped me." I watched as she crinkled her nose and almost chuckled. As serious as it may have been, it created an extremely amusing mental picture in my head.

"And. . .?"

"Pshht," she almost laughed at the apparent obviousness of my question. "And I kicked his ass."

"Good girl," I commended with a smirk. She took another sharp left, scaring the shit out of me. "Hey, where are we going?" I remembered my initial question before I had been distracted.

"Charlie." she responded quickly, "Because Edward? He has to know. Now. Like, I don't even care if you don't think it's a 'good time', hell, I'll tell him myself if you don't want to, but it has to be done."

I couldn't argue with her because I was having the exact same thoughts on the particular subject as well. "What about Laurent?" I dared asking.

She stiffened for a moment. "We'll tell him about that first so he can send some guys over there," she told me in a relatively shaky voice. I wanted to comfort her, but there really wasn't much I could do in that moment by the way she was driving. I'd probably just end up being thrown against the windshield.

We flew into the worker's parking lot of Charlie's huge main building – where his office was. Wasting no time, Bella slid in an ID card and the door supposedly only for workers slid open. She tugged on my hand, indicating for me to follow her.

We walked swiftly through the vast halls. "Bella," I said in a low, urgent voice. "What are we gonna do? We can't just prance in there and tell him."

"That's exactly what we're doing." The way she said it told me there'd be no further consensus as to what I thought on the subject. She clearly had a pretty good idea of what was about to happen.

"Miss Swan," some twenty year-old woman sat behind the granite counter, stopping her typing and looking up at the two of us as we approached. I ignored her pointed smile in my direction. I was definitely not in the mood.

"Gianna," Bella responded pleasantly. "I need to talk to my dad."

"The both of you?" she rose a skeptical eyebrow. Bella nodded, looking irritated. "I'll need identification then if he's going to see him too."

"Shit," I mumbled unthinkingly. I dug into the pocket of my old sweatpants, finding nothing. Of course there was nothing – I had been asleep before this. Why the hell would I have identification on me as I slept?

A thought suddenly occurred to me. I glanced over at Bella; she had on a t-shirt with the sleeves and sides cut-off and a hot pink sports bra on underneath. Oh, not to mention her lovely booty shorts as well. Her ass was hardly even covered. I almost groaned. Charlie would surely love that.

Bella had been completely oblivious to both her and my apparel as well until she saw the look on my face. I smirked as she bit her lip and blushed. At least I had on a t-shirt and sweatpants.

"I don't have any," I finally confessed. "It's at home."

"Well then I'm afraid you can't go in," she sounded pleased with herself as she sent me a cheerful look. "I'll be happy to keep you company though while she talks to Charlie."

Bella crossed her arms and huffed. "Oh for the love of God," she spat. "We don't have time for this. He's my dad – I can see him when I want." She took hold of my hand. "_He's_ my boyfriend – he doesn't need identifi-fucking-cation." It was very clear that this wasn't the first disagreement the two of them have ever had.

Without another word, she pulled me away and began a swift walk towards Charlie's office. "Nice," I commented under my breath.

She narrowed her eyes as she kept them focused on the space in front of her. "Well it's true," she muttered angrily. "And she can just kiss my ass if she wants."

Okay, to say Bella was tense would have been the biggest understatement of the century. Rightfully so, though. I mean, Laurent was at home. Dead. Her house was broken into – state's top security equipment trashed. I was probably guessing she was still shaken up by the whole 'almost being caught' thing as well.

I didn't even bother beating myself up about this one. Sure, it was my fault, but honestly – what was the use anymore? It's not like my internal head-swearing would make much of a difference to the situation. Me moping around wasn't going to help anything.

My life was falling apart before my eyes. . .You'd think maybe I'd have a little more initiative to not go down without a fight. Truth was, I didn't care what the hell happened anymore.

Seriously. How much worse could things possibly get?

But I spoke to soon. When Bella knocked on the door and Charlie opened, his face told me to be very worried for the conversation we were about to have. He knew something was wrong. Obviously. I don't care who you were – people generally didn't visit their dad at four in the morning on a normal basis.

"Bells?" He asked in confusion as his eyes darted warily back and forth between the two of us.

She wasted no time throwing herself into the room and frantically diving into panic-mode. "Dad, we have a big problem, and there's something really important Edward and I have to tell you. We've been waiting for too long. You have to know."

A thought in Charlie's head at what Bella had just said made him look oddly relieved. He shot me a look of suspicion. "Edward." he stated very calmly. "Please don't tell me I have to kick your ass? If the next words out of Bella's mouth are anything indicating me being a grandpa. . ."

I actually snorted. _Snorted_. Telling him Bella was pregnant would be a hell of a lot easier than what we were about to do.

"Nope, no baby," I quickly assured with a half-grin. What the hell was I doing smiling? Another person was just killed on my account. I almost punched myself in the face. I should have.

"Our house was broken into," Bella stated bluntly, finally getting to the point. "Everything in the security room is smashed." She paused for a moment in hesitation, shutting her eyes for a short moment to gain composure. "Laurent was killed."

Charlie's eyes grew wide. "What?"

"Just what I said." She responded. "Which is why we need to talk to you."

"Jesus, Bella," he rubbed his temples in exasperation as he picked up the phone on his desk. "About _what_? You're starting to really scare me now." She didn't say anything at first. "Well I gotta get over there," he suddenly stated, standing up. "Get a group of men and–"

"No," she quickly cut him off. "You can't."

He looked at her in confusion. "Why?"

"This is more important," she told him. "We have to tell you, and you have to hear it. It can't wait anymore. It's been put off for way too long, and if we wait any longer, someone else is gonna die."

He seemed to trust her words. Without another word to us, he was immediately on the phone. "Yeah, get your set and go to my place," he instructed with authority, "Someone's been murdered. Get every single piece of evidence you can, arrest anyone you find there, and make sure the house hasn't been chipped." He hung up the phone.

With a serious look, he nodded his head towards the two chairs in front of his desk. I gulped.

I felt like I was trapped in one of those prison movies. Bella and I sat in separate, side-by-side arm chairs as Charlie sat at his desk, facing us with a grim expression. I took a deep breath.

"I want you two to tell me everything," he sounded emotionless and professional, but that was only because he was treating this seriously – as he should. He wouldn't remain so calm once the story was out though. . .I was sure of that.

I began wondering where to begin. Not wanting to take up his whole day – like he cared anyways – I decided a quick skim through my childhood was all that was necessary. And all that I could handle.

After all, I had already shared this exact same story to Carlisle no more than a little over a month ago. Truth be told, I was getting damn tired of repeating myself.

Maybe just putting everyone together in one, big conference room would have been a better option. I almost chuckled at the picture it provided in my head.

I took another deep breath before jumping in. No more stalling. "My real name is Edward Cullen," simple enough. "My mother's name was Esme, and my father's name is Carlisle." I saw recognition in his eyes and knew he recognized the name.

"I knew you looked familiar. . ." he pondered out loud.

"Up until last month, I had never met Carlisle before." Charlie nodded in confirmation that he understood why. "That's who Bella and I were visiting in Phoenix."

"Bells?"

She nodded. He sighed. I already knew he wasn't going to be a big fan of all this deception and shit I had influenced on his daughter, so I didn't even try to convince myself he wasn't going to get mad. Because he would.

"Anyways," I continued, clearing my throat. "My mom and I lived in Chicago. . ." I proceeded on without a pause to tell him about how we moved to Paris for a couple of years after the death of my aunt.

Eventually, the real story began. "You have to understand that I never really understood why a lot of this happened until recently," I wondered why I was being so formal. "But now that I know. . ." I shut my eyes for a moment. "I get it. And I feel like I should apologize in advance, before I tell you my next words, because trust me. . .afterwards, I'll be lucky to be alive after this conversation."

Charlie raised a curious eyebrow as Bella nudged me irritatedly in the arm with her bony elbow. "Shi–" I began before correcting, "_Shoot_," I narrowed my eyes as I rubbed my arm in a soothing manner. "I was just warning him. . ."

"I can't help but warn you this then, Dad," she shot me a frustrated look, "Edward's very. . .selfless. So don't believe him when he says this is all his fault – he's wrong. And he's also extremely over-dramatic. So you might wanna ignore that too."

I gave her a very pointed eye roll. She had more faith in her dad's temper than I did, that was for sure.

"Okay, kid," he turned back to me with a flustered expression. "Why don't you just spit it out; I'm starting to get nervous here."

"Rightfully so," I muttered under my breath. Bella elbowed me again. That shit _hurt_.

"Long story short," I picked up on where I had left off, "My uncle Alec Volturi and his family had us over for dinner a few nights after we returned to Chicago. I kind of saw it as a welcome home party, I guess." I paused. "But I was just young and stupid." I stated flatly.

"Before I knew what was happening, we were in the living room, and my mother was being beaten." I couldn't help but fidget in my seat a little as I said the words in a tight voice. I locked my eyes with his and held his stare. "They murdered her that night."

I decided to stop all together for a few moments because it looked like he wanted to say a few things. "That name sounds really familiar. Volturi, did you say?"

I nodded. Though I could hardly agree with his tone of voice as he said the vile name.

He pursed his lips in silent thought for a few moments before acknowledgement struck his features. "Oh, yes, Alec Volturi. I was involved a little with his court case. . .he's in jail for life, I believe."

I nodded again. "That's where I put him." Why couldn't I say the words proudly? At least I had locked one of the bastards up for good.

"Okay," he eventually said, "I'm with you so far." His expression turned to pure fascination as I uncovered piece by piece of what brought us all in that cool, air-conditioned room on a sunny day.

"After she died," I continued, "I turned him in. My mom's good friend was a lawyer, so I guess I had no problems in that aspect. . .Well yeah, you know the rest. He went to jail. For life."

"Not having a family to retreat to or not wanting to live with a man I was fairly sure hated me," I told him, "I faked my own death to the government so I wouldn't have to be put in some crappy orphanage. Since I was only fifteen, I knew that's where I most likely would have ended up."

Because there was more to the story, he didn't press for information like my father had on how I had gotten away with faking my death.

This is where the hard part began. I began explaining to him about the three others; about Aro, Caius, and Marcus, and how their sole purpose of life was to take mine. I told him how they wanted both revenge and vengeance for my father not being able to save Jane and for my turning in their father.

I told him about the first phone call I had gotten from them; about how my life was based on staying hidden and avoiding being hunted. I also began telling him about the Runaways. I told him where I lived and about how careful I was to keep everyone around me safe.

Finally, the story came to a turn of events; the main reason we were here. Bella's part.

I was about to open my mouth to speak when suddenly, Bella unexpectedly stepped in for me. "I was walking home from school one day, which was stupid," she added with a grimace, "And these pigs were following me, so for some reason my judgment led me to believe walking down some abandoned alley was a good idea."

"Before I knew what was going on, lovely little Alice saved the day." She told her dad cheerfully. "Which is how I met Edward. And everyone else."

I folded my arms across my chest and relaxed myself further into the chair. With Bella, this story would most likely take up the rest of the day. Better her than me though I guess. At least Charlie would be more understanding. . .

"So, to put things simply, we all became friends." I couldn't help but snort. Friends. _Right_. She gave me an irritated sideways glance before continuing. "It was my choice to involve myself in the first place, Dad, just so you know, so no one's to blame here but myself."

Charlie gave her a wary look before proceeding with a hesitant nod.

"So Edward warned me to stay away from him – not to get close or anything like that. Naturally though," she turned to beam brightly at me. "I didn't listen. I don't know what it was," she explained as she pursed her lips. "But there was something about him, and we just sort of. . .clicked."

I had never really realized how close the two of them were. The fact that she was so honest and open about what she was saying truly did surprise me.

"Edward told me about himself," she said with sudden darkness in her voice. "About the Volturi. About his life." she paused, dropping her gaze down to her hands in her lap. "It wasn't hard to figure out that he needed someone."

Charlie's next words took me completely by surprise. "Did it ever occur to you, Bella, that_ you_ may have needed someone as well?"

"Um. . ." was her brilliant response.

"I'm serious," he pressed on. "I've never seen you so. . .I don't know how to explain it. Happy maybe? Even after everything that just happened. . .you are honestly, genuinely happy."

All she did was stare at him and nod.

"So anyways," she finally continued after a long pause of silence, suddenly sounding oddly self-conscious. "I guess you could say we had each other's backs." The corners of her lips twitched as she fought back a smile. "Edward protected me; I protected him." Charlie's look indicated that he was clearly in doubt with that last part.

"And then you fell in love," Charlie smirked as he mimicked her voice.

She narrowed her eyes. "I was _getting_ to that part."

I had to admit – this was going oddly better than I had originally planned. I was actually at ease. I mean, the lightness in the room was seriously comforting, knowing we were all somewhat on the same page with the situation.

The bad part was coming though. I decided to tell it, rather than Bella, sparing her the glare I knew he was about to unleash on me. I gulped, preparing myself. "One day, they caught us."

His eyes widened slightly but he still remained calm. "What?" He asked simply, as if not believing my words to be true.

I bit my lip and nodded. "It was my fault really," I told him. "I wasn't on my guard and I was completely stupid to believe that nothing would happen to us when I wasn't being careful enough." I lowered my head. "It was my horrible judgment that caused us to get. . .caught."

"But it's okay now, Dad," Bella quickly cut in. "We escaped and we're fine. Right Edward? Let's get to the important stuff?" The both of us stared at her in shock. Why was she acting so not herself? I was concerned that this was her way of dealing with nerves – pretending nothing was wrong.

"Bella," Charlie said sternly. "This is serious. I need to know everything." I nodded in agreement with him.

"I'm not going to lie to you, Charlie, because I already have too much. We were both almost killed." The maturity and business-like quality of my voice did not go unnoticed by myself. Why was I talking so formal? _Still_? There was something off about the way I was feeling. Maybe it was _my_ nerves.

"But we did get away, by an extremely lucky chance, and that's when Bella forced me to find the missing pieces; to find my dad."

Perplexed my the news he was hearing, he sat in a silent trance. The expression on his face made me confused as to whether he wanted to hit me, or hug me.

"When the Volturi found out about Bella, I wouldn't let her out of my sight. I _don't_ let her out of my sight ever." I told him honestly. "I went back to high school so I could make sure she was never alone." To any normal person, I would have sounded like the biggest creep. But the thing was – I wasn't. It was sincerely necessary to do all of these things. The look on Charlie's face told me he knew exactly what I was thinking.

I decided to wait with the whole Renee thing until the very end. "So there's our problem. Basically, they won't stop until they get what they want. Me – dead. No, that's not true, actually. Hence the reason Bella's in danger: they want to hurt me as much as absolutely possible, so by killing her," my voice cracked at the last part, "They would be killing me."

It was a lot to take in; I knew from experience, but I was surprised at how _well_ he was taking all of this. I mean, the last thing I expected was for him to react calmly about this whole thing.

He pinched the bridge between his eyes before leaning back into his chair and sighing. I knew he was about to go into some long speech, so I spoke before he could start. It was only fair that he knew the truth.

"Charlie," I said with a grimace, "There's one more thing you should know. . ."

He rose both eye brows. "What else?" He could tell by the tone in my voice that this was serious.

I shut my eyes. I couldn't stand to see his reaction. "They put the bomb in Renee's car." I stated quietly, "It was suppose to have been Bella who died. . ." I couldn't finish that. I trailed off as I let my words hang ominously in the air.

"I'm so sorry, Charlie," I finally breathed.

It was ages before he finally looked up at me. His eyes were tired; worn down and full of exhaustion as he stared at me for a long moment. The next words that came out of his mouth had been what I was least expecting to hear.

"You've been through more than a lifetime of pain, haven't you kid?" I hesitated before nodding solemnly. "Edward? I owe you my life for keeping my baby girl safe all this time."

I stared at him in shock as a hallow chuckle threatened to escape from my lips. Was he being serious right now? Had he not just heard what I said? "You don't owe me anything, sir." I bowed my head, ashamed.

I didn't hear him get up, but suddenly he was placing a hand on my shoulder, standing beside my chair. "What happened to Renee was not your fault, as much as you think it might have been. _You_ weren't the one who put that bomb in her car."

I couldn't believe it. I was absolutely speechless. After everything – _everything _– I was the one being comforted and forgiven, welcomed into this man's life with open arms after everything I had put his family through.

It was in that moment that I realized something. Well, not so much as realized; it was that moment that I finally _believed_ something. Holding grudges and hatred towards people who genuinely did nothing wrong didn't make anyone's life any better.

Sure, I was positive it _was_ my fault, but at the same time Bella had helped me finally realize that it really wasn't in a way. I did what was right all those years ago, and to my unfortunate luck, those right actions ended up nearly killing me.

Charlie began pacing behind us. "Well damn," was all he was really able to say. "_Shit_," I would have smirked at his language, had the situation not been so incredibly serious.

"Volturi," he pondered out loud. "_Volturi_. . .I still vaguely recognize the name. Is there anything else?" He questioned.

"Alec has four kids," I explained, "Aro, Marcus, Caius, and Victoria. The three boys are the ones trying to kill us. Victoria is the only good one. . ." I trailed off, suddenly wondering where she was these days. "I'm guessing the three of them are in your records as missing, because they 'went into hiding' after Alec was put in jail."

Charlie was a smart man – it didn't take him too long to put the pieces together. He began slowly nodding as he pursed his lips and thought silently to himself.

"They're who broke into the house tonight, correct?" He finally asked. I gulped before nodding. "How old did you say they were?"

"Around my age," I informed him, "Give or take a couple of years."

He nodded again before another long moment of silence passed. Eventually, he walked back over to his chair, sitting down and letting out a long sigh. "I just have one question for you; the both of you," he stated calmly.

I looked over to Bella who was looking unusually pale. "Go ahead," she encouraged in a shaky breath. This girl was a roller coaster of emotions. How could I honestly be expected to keep up?

"Why didn't you tell me about any of this sooner?"

I bit my lip. I guess I knew he would ask it eventually. "Um." Was my brilliant response.

Bella surprised me by taking the reigns and answering for me. "I'll tell you," she said confidently. "It's what he's been telling me for the past three months. He didn't want to put _you_ in danger too."

Charlie stared at her for a moment with an expression that indicated he was seriously doubting what she had just said was true. He turned to me in confusion. I just nodded.

Once again, another long moment passed. It was impossible to read Charlie's face or decipher what was going on in his mind in that moment. I couldn't imagine how overwhelmed he was with this new information.

"Bella," he said suddenly. "I'm gonna ask you to wait outside the room for a few minutes. I need to talk to Edward. . ." She was about to protest. "Alone."

* * *

**CHAPTER SONG: **Prepare The Masses - A Change Of Pace

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Courir _- "run"

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**Reviews are better than a talk alone with Charlie.**


	24. Beau Bébé

******I'm sorry!  
It's late, I know. But. Better late than never, right?  
Meh. Please forgive me? *Alice pout* PLEASE?**

**I don't think words will ever be able to cover my undying gratitude towards each and every one of you.  
I love you all.  
You're the cheese to my flipping macaroni.**

**

* * *

**

**Bella – Beau Bébé**

I didn't know whether I was suppose to scream or cry.

The fact that Laurent was dead hadn't even had time to register in my mind before we dove into a confession session with Charlie. I paced nervously outside the room, listening for the raising of voices on the other side of the thick, wood door.

I wondered what they were talking about. Me? I hoped not.

I wasn't sure what I was suppose to make of Charlie's initial reaction to what we had told him. He was like me in the sense that he hid his emotions incredibly well. It was virtually impossible for me to be able to tell if he wanted to kiss Edward or kill Edward.

Based on every time the two had been together, Charlie seemed to really approve of him. Of course, that was before all of _this_ came up.

I knew my dad well though; well enough to know how understanding he was. Charlie's job involved hearing story after story of murder, tragedy, accidental death, suicide – the possibilities of stories were endless.

The effect all of those stories had on him was quite simple: Over the years, he had quite simply gotten use to the horror of the world. He was smart enough to know how people worked, and kind enough to understand the situation instead of just yelling and screaming and banishing Edward from the country.

Although, who was to say that wasn't what he was doing in that exact moment?

I was also anxious to find out more about what was going on back at the house. I was more than just a little scared by the fact that they had been in our house. . .only a small amount of distance between us. . .I shuddered.

They were getting desperate; they must have wanted this _really_ badly. And by 'this' I meant my head. And Edward's. Sweet. Just fucking _fantastic_.

These people were raging on psychopathic.

Minutes ticked by on the clock as I continued my uneasy five steps forward, turning around to retreat five steps back, then repeating the whole process. Something about all of this had me feeling extremely nervous.

I didn't believe Charlie would do something as drastic as ban Edward from me, but still. What if he did? I knew he wouldn't. . .But what if I was wrong?

According to lately, I was beginning to be wrong about a lot of things.

Another ten minutes passed when suddenly the door opened. I didn't even wait for an invitation to jump inside. Too anxious to be back into the conversation, I didn't watch what was in front of me and ran straight into Edward. He caught me, of course, saving me from a painful fall to the ground.

"Well that's embarrassing," I muttered as I awkwardly stood next to Edward. He chuckled, patting me on the back. I allowed myself a leeway of relief. He did chuckle. Whatever they had been talking about probably didn't involve kicking Edward out of the country.

Charlie knew he didn't have to repeat anything he had said to Edward, and I knew I didn't have to ask. Edward would tell me as soon as we were alone again. He noticed my nervous glancing around the room and sent me a small smile.

Charlie was on his computer typing something as he spoke to us. "You guys know the Radisson across the street? That's where you'll be staying as of tonight. Security will be down in the lobby and on each level as a precaution. I'll also have someone in the room next to you at all times to ensure as much closure as possible. They're not getting you there. I'd bet my life on that."

My stomach lurched. "Don't even joke, Dad."

He nodded simply before continuing on. "I'll need to figure out what happened at the house. There's a black Sedan waiting down at the front door. You remember Billy, right, Bella? He's going to escort the two of you over there and he'll be staying in the room next to you for now."

Without even realizing it, I had intertwined my fingers in Edward's strong warm hand.

"Bella, you have all the numbers you need to reach me on your phone. Give them to Edward so he has them too. I'll probably check in on you guys some time later this morning," he glanced at the clock that read just after four, "I don't want either of you leaving the room unless you have someone from security with you and notify me first. At all costs, _never_ split up."

He gave me a stern look. "Don't you dare try and pull something, Bellaboo." he instructed seriously. "I know you two have made it this far, so don't ruin all that progress. _Don't_ risk anything."

He didn't say anything to Edward because I was guessing he had already told him everything that needed to be said in that long half-hour the two of them were talking. "Call me when you get in your room," he requested as our dismissal. This wasn't business Charlie who was talking now; this was _Dad_ Charlie.

"I will," I nodded, turning to leave the room. "Love you, Daddy. Thank you."

"Love you too, Bells," he responded softly as I shut the door behind the two of us.

Edward remained silent as we walked through the empty hallways. "Your father's a good man," was all he told me. I nodded in agreement. He was a good man. To the core.

Just as Charlie had said, there was a black Sedan waiting to pick us up out by the front door. Edward slid in next to me after I got in. "Hey, Bella," I recognized the friendly, familiar tone of Billy, one of my dad's close colleagues. "And you must be Edward?" I saw him glance at Edward through the rear-view mirror. Edward nodded.

That was all that was said during the short car ride. Billy dropped us off at the front door, handing me a piece of paper before I got out of the vehicle. "I'll park the car then check into my room," he told us. "Bella, there's my number in case for some reason Charlie isn't reachable or if anything comes up here at the hotel. I'm sure after this is all figured out, Charlie will most likely be taking my room." It was clear that Billy had no idea why my sudden incognito was necessary.

"Thanks, Billy," I smiled.

Sometimes, there was just nothing else to say.

Checking into our room was easy. The manager was basically waiting for us at front desk and immediately knew who we were as soon as we approached. Granted, not many people checked into hotels at four in the morning, but still. It was weird.

After we were escorted up to the room by presumably one of the security guys Charlie had been explaining earlier, we entered our large suit – similar to the one in Phoenix – and everything suddenly felt a lot better than it had an hour ago.

Since neither of us had any luggage, nothing needed to be unpacked. Edward walked over to the large bed and sat down. "If you wanna go back to sleep I'll be your pillow," he informed me, distracted by other thoughts running through his head as his absentminded stare fell upon the intricate designs of the white comforter.

I knew he wasn't going to sleep for a while. In his eyes, another person's life had just been lost because of him. Surprisingly though, he seemed to be coping with this a lot better than I thought he would be.

Me on the other hand? I was still just in shock. I couldn't wrap my head around it all yet and frankly, I didn't _want_ to. "I'm good," I told him, refusing to go back to bed until I figured out the conversation him and Charlie had shared.

He knew my question was coming before I even had to ask. I crawled up onto the bed, into his lap. It was where I felt the safest. "He didn't threaten to kill me, if that's what you wanna know, Bee." he chuckled uneasily.

"Good," I said in satisfaction.

"Not to say I didn't deserve a death threat though," he added darkly.

I shut my eyes, shaking my head. "Shut _up_."

Ignoring my comment, he proceeded on with my original question. "He wanted to know a little more about the Volturi – wanted to know how I dealt with them in the past and how I basically lived life. . ."

"So why couldn't I have stayed in the room?" I asked.

"You have the tendency to interrupt quite a lot," he chuckled, shaking his head. "'Edward's such a hero', 'Don't yell at Edward, he's so great.'" He mocked, failing at achieving my correct tone of voice.

"Fuck you," I muttered.

"Tempting," he licked his lips, wagging his eyebrows. " But anyways," he quickly went on. "He asked me _our_ arrangements. Like how we handled all this stuff together." He paused for a moment. "He took it surprisingly well when I told him we spent almost every night together."

I groaned. Surprisingly well could have meant multiple things. _No_ father would take it 'surprisingly well' when he found out his daughter was sneaking a boy into her room every night. He read that on my face. "Oh it's not like it wasn't for good reasons, Bee." He snapped in his own defense. "And yes, as far as you're concerned he _did_ take it quite well. He almost seemed happy."

"That's bullshit but go on," I pressed.

He let out a sigh of exhaustion. "God bless me," he muttered under his breath. I ignored him. "And then yeah, he basically just wanted to know more details about all the important stuff." Could he have gotten any vaguer?

"And that's it?"

"That's it." He confirmed, not too convincingly.

"No, it's not," I corrected with a frown.

I could tell he wanted to argue at first, thought about it for a few moments, then sighed in defeat. "He also wanted to know what you were to me." His green eyes grew soft. He didn't say anything else for a long moment.

"_And_?"

"And I told him?" He did that annoying thing where you answered with an answer. He noticed my eyes narrow and backtracked. I could tell his amusement towards my demanding, pushy attitude was starting to wear off.

"Why don't you get the fuck off your high horse for a minute and let me talk," he told me, half joking, half not. He was right, of course, and I realized I was being rude.

"Sorry," I muttered as I waited for him to continue with a sincerely patient smile.

"It's okay," he quickly responded with a small grin. "I don't know what you want me to tell you though. It was guy stuff. You know? One of those 'Your intentions towards my daughter better be good or I'm gonna kick your ass' talks. Granted, we might be going at all of this backwards, but you get what I mean. . ."

I wasn't sure why I was firing so many questions at him. I then realized I was distracting myself; doing a damn good job in the process. I hardly even remembered about vivid pictures of the scene in my mind from back home.

"Did he tell you what his plan was?" I switched to a different set of questions quickly before I could dwell on what my mind was threatening to remind me of.

"He said he was going over to your house, taking care of everything there, then looking into our options."

I nodded. "Okay."

We both sat there in silence as the silence sat between us. "So. . ." I began hesitantly, "What do you wanna do?"

He gave me a skeptical look before chucking quietly. "I don't think I'll ever be able to keep up with you, Bee." He shook his head. "I dunno, what do _you_ wanna do?"

I then gave _him_ a skeptical look. "You definitely know what I wanna do. You just don't wanna do it."

"That's definitely not it," he defended himself, "You just pick the worst times to wanna do it."

"I _always_ wanna do it."

He sighed, "Of course you do."

"And you don't?" This conversation was becoming comical. I held back my snickers.

"I do." he confirmed quickly, "But apparently I can control that better than you ca–"

I cut him off. "So are we going to or aren't we?" I crossed my arms, stifling a smirk.

Just then there was a knock at the door. "Lez do it," he exclaimed with a grin. "Right now."

I lightly punched him in the shoulder as I climbed off the bed. "Asshole," I muttered as I walked to the door. Cautiously, I pulled it open. It was some guy in a black outfit with a friendly, serious expression on his face. "Bella? I'm Embry Call; I work with your father." He handed me the pink duffel bag in his hand – my pink duffel bag – and then my big purse. "He threw in a bunch of clothes and stuff for you." He explained as he quickly pulled another one of my suitcases into view. "This one too." He reached behind him once again and handed me a smaller bag. "Here are your toiletries."

"Thanks," I smiled, pulling the bags into the room.

"I believe Sam is out to pick up some things for your friend," he moved his gaze over my shoulder to Edward who was still sitting in the middle of the bed. "He'll be here to drop it off in an hour or so." He paused. "I'll be down in the lobby if you need anything."

Who went shopping to buy clothes at four in the morning? What stores were _open_ at four in the morning? It was completely unnecessary, and I knew Edward could wait a few hours without having anything clothes other than what he had on at the moment.

Besides, the only store open at the moment was probably Walmart.

I shuddered at the mere thought. "Call Sam right now and tell him to wait a few hours," I quickly told him, "Edward will manage. It's way too early for shopping." I added a polite smile at the end to not come off as a controlling bitch.

"Agreed," he nodded with a smile. "I'll call him once I get downstairs. Get some sleep, Bella. Your dad wanted me to tell you that." He turned around to leave again.

"Wait," I quickly stopped him once again. "How's everything at home?"

He shrugged. "Whoever did it left no evidence," he said in a clipped tone, "Other than Laurent and the security room, everything seems to be in perfect condition."

"Okay," I excepted the information he gave me, "Thanks, Embry."

I walked back over to the bed after he left, yawning. "Okay," he said as I ducked my head under his arm and rested it on his shoulder. "You're definitely going back to bed." I shook my head, shutting my eyes and yawning again. "Humor me."

"You know," I snuggled into him, "When I first met you, you _definitely_ didn't come off as the cuddling type."

"Yeah?" he chuckled. "Well things change."

"Clearly," I muttered, rolling my eyes. "But I'm serious. All you did those first few days was glare at me, ya dick." He laughed. "See, look how far you've come since then? Told you you were fixable." I finished sleepily.

"Maybe you were right," he squeezed me tightly before also yawning himself and planting an affectionate kiss on the top of my head. "Goodnight, my beau bébé." I grinned widely against his chest. That had been his new thing over the past week.

After he laid us both down I actually did manage to fall asleep for a good hour or two.

When I woke up, I heard Charlie's voice coming from somewhere in the room. I glanced up at Edward, noticing he was still asleep, which meant that Charlie was on the phone with someone. I intensively listened in.

"Look Carlisle," he said with concern. _Carlisle_. Not many people had that name, and it was too likely to be a coincidence that he was on the phone with anyone other than Edward's father. "These guys won't stop. What they're capable of. . .it's ridiculous."

There was a long pause as he listened to Carlisle's response. "Mmhmm," he repeated a few times before he finally spoke. "It's beyond worrisome that they were able to get into the house. _My_ house of all people's. . .And Edward and Bella? What are they suppose to do? It seems like these Volturi people have access to just about everything."

Another long moment went by with Carlisle talking and Charlie listening. For some reason, it was beyond weird that my dad and my boyfriend's dad were having a conversation with each other. What was weirder? They've known each other for a long time.

"I have no idea how they've both managed to hold out this long. . .Even taking everything that's recently happened into consideration. I know I wouldn't be able to cope with it all. Especially Edward," he said, "Had a long talk with him. He's a really good kid, your son. Heart's in the right place. . .I just can't believe how much he's been through. Kid's stronger than I could ever be." He paused for another minute. "I just wish they would have come to me about this sooner."

"Yeah," he said a couple of times. "Uh-huh." Another long pause. "Instead of sneaking around and trying not to get caught sleeping together like every other teenager in the planet, these two are sneaking around and trying not to get caught so they can stay _alive_."

Charlie's words made me wonder something. What would Edward and I's relationship be like if everything bad in his past was factored out of the equation? I refused to believe that we wouldn't have been compatible at all had it not been for the dark forces that brought us together.

. . .But what if that was the only reason we were together?

I was it for Edward. I was all he had; his only option. He didn't _have_ the options. It's not like he could just go waltzing down the street and pour his soul into some other girl. I was it. I had the options though, and damn it, I didn't want them. Because in a way, he was it for me too.

I hadn't noticed Charlie had gotten off the phone until the silence of the room set in. I was glad Edward and I's embrace wasn't overly intimate, unafraid of being caught together in a bed by Charlie. After all, he obviously already figured out our long-time sleeping habits.

Besides, I was a big girl now. Eighteen and legally free to do as I pleased.

I was almost going to wake Edward up so that he could talk to Charlie instead but I decided against it. I thought about when the last time me and Charlie had a conversation with just the two of us.

Very careful not to disturb Edward, I wiggled out of his arms and walked over to sit next to Charlie on the large couch in the corner of the room. The TV was on but it was muted as he stared blankly at the screen.

I sat next to him and the moments where neither of us said anything passed by. Eventually, he sighed. "Never in a million years would I have ever predicted you to be in a situation like this."

"I know."

"So much has happened in the last couple of months, Bella, and I need you to promise me something." His voice was calm and gentle, lulling me into a state of contentment.

"Anything," I responded quickly.

"Promise me you won't run off," he requested quietly. "Promise that from now on, you're going to come to me when you have a problem, and you won't try and fix it yourself." He sucked in a large breath of air. "Especially now," he implied. A long moment passed by. "I can't lose you too."

"I promise," was all I could manage to say.

"I talked to Carlisle," he suddenly changed the subject. "Can't believe he's Edward's dad." He added the last part in surprised astonishment.

"Oh?" I remained supposedly oblivious. "What did he say?"

"He wants to help," he said, "But he doesn't know how."

I nodded. I already knew this.

"So listen, Bells," he began in a much less tense tone, "Like I told Edward, you guys will just hang out here for a while until I know what we're up against; until I figure out an actual plan." He eyed Edward with a jokingly skeptical eyebrow raise. "I know you two are behaving responsibly."

I blushed. Even though he may have been joking, the intent was clear. I wanted to tell him that Edward wasn't the one he needed to worry about in _that_ aspect; that it was his sex-fiend of a daughter who needed sex-rehab or something along the lines of therapy to take care of such drastic urges.

Okay, so I exaggerate. But still. Once you go Edward Cullen, you can't get any better. _Not_ exaggerating. In fact, it was an understatement really. But I had to stop thinking about such things with my dad. . .less than two feet away from me.

Yeah. Awkward much?

I gave him an assuring grin and nodded. "What time is it?"

"A little after ten," he responded absentmindedly. "When do you think Edward will be up? You two should get some breakfast and start the day."

"Brilliant idea," I murmured sarcastically. "Start the day so we can just chill here for the remainder of it? _Fun_." Okay, so that came out a little bit sharper than I intended it to. I shot him an apologetic look, biting my lip.

He switched the subject. "We didn't find any traces as to where they might have fled to. My guess is right after you two got out of there last night, they either tried to follow you and lost you or they just flat out ran."

I folded my hands in my lap, staring down at them. "I don't know where they went, if that's what you're wondering. . ." But Edward probably did.

"We don't know where to start searching," he confessed idly.

I sighed. I reached over to the glass of water he had sitting next to him on the coffee table and grabbed an ice cube out of the water. Before it could melt in my hand, I threw it swiftly across the room, successfully nailing Edward in the back of his sleeping head.

He immediately woke up, bringing his hand over his eyes as he sat up and placed the other where the object of my impatience had hit him. "What the fuck was that for?" he mumbled in sleepy irritation.

I stifled a giggle, already smirking at his pissed expression. He darted his eyes around the room until they fell upon me. . .and then Charlie. His eyes widened. "Uh."

Charlie shot me a stern look. "Nice," he commented before waving a carefree hand in Edward's direction and rolling his eyes. "Edward. I'm cool. You know that. I'm not gonna shoot you for dropping the F bomb, so calm down." He shot me another annoyed glance. "In fact, you're entitled to swear when crazy over here's throwin' rocks of frozen water at you while you're sleeping."

A lazy grin spread across Edward's face. I smiled too. When he noticed my smile, he narrowed his eyes. "What?" I snapped. He rose his eye brows in exasperation. "Whatever. Sorry."

It took me a moment to remember why I had waken him up in the first place. He yawned as he stretched his arms high over his head, revealing the tops of his sculpted pelvises and lower abdomen, distracting me even further.

Charlie cleared his throat, pulling me out of my apparent trance. I wasn't normally one for blushing, but I was positive that my face was as red as a tomato at the fact that I had just been caught ogling Edward's body.

It was Edward's turn to smirk now.

I played it off as if nothing had happened, staring down at my lap once again. "Edward, Charlie needs to know some of the places the Volturi might be located. I don't remember the place they had taken us to but I know you do."

I peeked up at him through my eye lashes, noticing his face become serious. "There are a few places they've been in the past," he paused before quickly telling Charlie the location we had been taken to a month ago. Charlie briskly wrote it down. "But there's no way of knowing which place is their solid quarters. I mean, they move around a lot, so they could technically be anywhere."

Charlie frowned. "That's what I was afraid you'd say." He paused. "One more question and I'll let you two be. . ." he gave me a suggestive look. I blushed again. Holy shit was this getting uncomfortable.

"You mentioned others," he began, "Bella, you've told me about Alice. . .who else is there?"

"Alice Brandon," I confirmed, "Rosalie Hale, Emmett McCarty, and Jasper Whitlock."

He turned to Edward. "I expect you all are really close." Edward nodded. "Do they know about everything?" He asked cautiously. Edward nodded again. Charlie seemed thoughtful for a moment. "How. . .involved are they with everything?"

Edward was quick with his response. "The Volturi know who the four of them are, but at the same time they really don't. They have no names, no records. Most likely just the knowledge that we're all like family."

Charlie looked relieved. "Good. So you don't think we have to worry about their safety at the moment?"

He pursed his lips. "Yet, at least."

Charlie nodded before slowly getting to his feet. I stood up as well, giving him a quick hug – which I had been doing a lot lately – before he began making his way to the door. "Call if you kids need anything," he reminded us seriously. "I'll be around."

"Bye, Dad," I smiled, politely ushering him out.

As soon as the door was closed and Charlie was gone, I spun around, lowering my head and looking up at Edward through my eyelashes as I made my way to the bed. "Now," I pursed my lips seductively, "Where were we?"

I jumped onto the bed and threw myself at him with maybe just a little more enthusiasm than he was prepared for. I pushed him back onto the soft mattress, running my hands up his chest. I had become quite accustomed to such gestures lately, shortly after realizing the affect it had on him.

"You know," I told him between kisses, "I would do the whole 'prance around in lingerie while I boycott you' thing again if I wasn't worried another food fight would break out. Charlie's been pretty damn content with the two of us and I really _don't_ wanna push that by having him walk in here with syrup splattered everywhere. . ."

He let out one of his low, throaty, sexy chuckles. "You say that like it was a bad thing. I rather liked _you_ with syrup splattered everywhere." His green eyes were shining.

I plunged my lips back to his for a moment. "You, honey bunch, are just lucky I'm not in the mood to seek payback at the moment."

"'S not my fault you like my super sexy body," he slurred the words into how a gay man would sound. Lord only knew what fifty-shades of personality that boy had in him.

I kissed down his neck. "You think you're joking."

Before I could come up with another witty response, he was suddenly pulling his shirt over my head and pressing my face to his chest, trapping me under his white t-shirt. I wiggled and squirmed, giggling and squealing as I tried to escape.

I began frantically nuzzling my nose all over his chest, tickling him. His loud laughter bounced off the walls, echoing back to my ears like the sweetest kind of music.

The knock on the door caused our fun to stop abruptly.

He freed my head, snickering quietly when he saw my messy hair. I tried to rake it down with my fingers as I walked to the door, pissed at whoever it was interrupting us. An unfamiliar face stood on the other side of the door as I swung it open.

He was a hotel bellhop, late fifties I was guessing, with a kind smile. "Miss Swan? Charlie sent me up here to order you breakfast." He waited patiently for my response as I studied his face.

I was totally unprepared for the emotional tidal wave that crashed over me in that moment. I knew it would only be a matter of time before the realization of my most recent loss hit me. Laurent. Poor, innocent, Laurent.

My vision began to blur as I rapidly began blinking away the moisture. It was amazing how drastically emotions could change in the matter of a heart beat. "Miss Swan?" he repeated, hesitantly this time. Miss Swan; what Laurent called me.

I swallowed hard. "We won't be needing anything, thank you," was all I could manage. He smiled again, nodding and bowing his head before walking away. I shut the door.

Edward's arms were wide open and ready as I hurdled back onto the bed and into them. He folded me into his warm embrace as I ducked my head under his chin, laying it on his chest and trying to keep my breathing steady.

"You don't have to be brave," he whispered softly, stroking his strong hands up and down my back. "Don't be. For once, just let yourself feel."

I felt the wetness creep onto my cheeks. "But what if it hurts?"

"I've got you, don't I?"

And he did.

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**A/N: **Okay, so I know all of you had high hopes for the whole Edward/Charlie talk. If I would have known first hand what a request it was, I would have totally wrote it in. Who knows? Maybe it'll wind up an extra some day. . .Point is, I decided to leave it up to your imagination. If you hate me for that, I'm sincerely sorry. I'll make it up to you sometime, I swear!

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Forgiven - Relient K

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Beau Bébé _- "beautiful baby"

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**Reviews are just as nice as a phone call with Carlisle.**


	25. Soyez CoffreFort

**I was originally gonna post this like two days ago, but my internet's been out for a few days so I guess that original plan got delayed. Hope you can forgive me?**

**So I love you all.  
Like, really love you.**

And I'm pissing off my sister by keeping her up and typing this, so guess that's all I have to say for now. . .

**

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**Edward - Soyez Coffre-Fort**

I lazily flipped through TV channels as I laid sprawled out across the large couch in our suite. I wanted my futon. I missed that fucking thing. My mind wandered to nothing particular as I let my eyes droop shut.

I yawned, adjusting my position to a more comfortable spot. It had been a _long_ night.

I mean, usually I didn't get that much sleep in the first place, but I was lucky to have gotten even only a mere sixty-minutes. Every hour Bella would wake up either crying or screaming in her sleep. It was unnerving and never-ending.

When she would calm down and fall back to sleep, I would try myself, only to be interrupted shortly into my slumber by yet another round of crying. Was I mad at her? Fuck no. She had absolutely every right to be in mourning about all of this.

The fact that we were locked inside this room all day and night wasn't even half of it. Because trust me; I could handle being alone with Bella 24/7 as long as needed. In fact, that's what it was basically like before we even checked into this place anyways.

It was the fact that everyone just. . .knew about everything now.

Well, Charlie at least. In my book, he sure counted as everyone.

Needless to say, sleep was on the top of my list of priorities at the moment. It even managed to surpass my undying need to shamelessly fuck the ever-loving-shit out of my lovely girlfriend. Huh. Who would have ever thought _that_ was possible.

Fact was, I was in need of sleep. Badly.

I glanced over at Bella – who had been doing extremely better than last night – and rolled my eyes. Her intense gaze was focused on the hot pink nail polish she was applying to her toe nails. "Shit," I heard her curse as she quickly dabbed awake the mistake she had made.

"The fact that you actually managed to obtain nail polish in the last twenty-four hours is beyond me," I muttered in amazement.

"Why, Mr. Cullen," she looked up and grinned. "I have to have _some_ way to occupy myself all day. I mean, what else is a girl to do, alone in a hotel room with her boyfriend? . . ." she trailed off suggestively.

"Not my fault I'm trying to stay on Charlie's good graces," I responded warily.

"Not _my_ fault you should just rename yourself Gandhi." She snapped back.

I rose an eyebrow, amused.

"I think you two have a lot in common," she explained with a nonchalant shrug. "First man to try and establish a war based around non-violence." She paused, shooting me a very pointed glance. "First man to try and establish a _relationship _based around _non-sex_."

There was a long moment of serious silence between the two of us.

Suddenly, I bursted out laughing.

"Holy _shit_," I accused breathlessly, "Aren't you little miss _kinky_."

"You did _not_ just use the word kinky," she scoffed.

"So lemme get this straight," I frowned. "_You_ can compare me to Gandhi – an old, dead, Indian man, and I'm not allowed to say _kinky_?"

The smile she gave me let me know that in her mind, there wasn't a single ounce of flawed logic in my statement.

"But seriously. We're being watched around this place like hawks. Who's to say Charlie hasn't already set up some surveillance camera in the room to keep an eye on things?"

Her face paled.

Eventually I went back to trying to get some sleep – a little _anxious_ from the previous conversation – and Bella went back to painting her nails.

Outside the room came muffled voices. "Sir, I'm afraid we can't let you in there."

_Holy shit_. He had people standing outside the door and monitoring our room now too?

"To hell I can't," responded the loud, familiar voice.

"_Sir_, who _are_ you?"

"Look," Emmett's obnoxious voice wasn't hard to miss. "I don't know if you know this or not, but I'm kind of a big deal."

"Oh lord. . ." I heard presumably Rose mutter.

Getting up, I walked over to the door and swung it open. Sure enough, a small gathering of people had formed in the hallway. Emmett, Rosalie, Alice, Jasper, two security guys, a bellhop, and. . ._Jacob_?

I grinned nervously at the eight of them.

They all stopped what they were doing to stare at me. "Uh, hey guys?"

"Edward, my good man," Em quickly walked over to stand beside me, throwing an arm around my shoulder. He glared at the two men in suits. "Last time you fools doubt my superiority." I rolled my eyes.

This would have been perfectly acceptable and completely _non_-awkward had Jacob Black not been there. Honestly, he had been the last person on my list of expectancy visits. Hell, Jessica Stanley was before him.

"So, do you guys, uh, wanna come in?"

"No, I wanted to stand out in this hallway all day and shoot spit in the air," Rosalie commended acidly.

Before I could respond to her lovely sarcasm, she pushed past me and into the room. The others followed. Everyone except Jacob. He stood hesitantly at the door, contemplating internally with himself on whether he should come inside or not.

"I don't wanna hold the door open all day," I didn't want him in our room either, but I wasn't going to go out of my way to make him feel unwelcome. Honestly? There wasn't really much hostility left in me after the past few days.

"I was, uh, kinda hoping to talk to Bella alone. . ." he muttered, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

"And?" I rose my eyebrows with an implied 'what do you want me to do about it?'

He sighed. "I guess I'll come in."

I grudgingly stepped aside, allowing him to enter. How in the hell did he even know we were here? Confused, I shut the door and walked back over to my spot on the bed, now occupied by Jazz's lazy ass.

Bella was already mid-conversation with Al and Rose as Em sat next to her on the ground with an arm draped lazily around her shoulder. "Been way too long, Hells Bells." he commented with a grin before turning to me. "You too, Peter Pansy. Seriously. When's the last time we've seen each other?"

"Three days ago, Emmett." I responded dryly. Jacob was leaning awkwardly against the wall, unnoticed by Bella. I cleared my throat, getting her attention. "Someone's here to see you," I nodded my head in his direction.

Her eyes widened a bit before a confused look spread across her face. She quickly removed herself from Emmett's grasp, standing up. "Jake?" The surprise in her voice wasn't hard to detect. "What are you doing here?"

"Bad timing, I know," he muttered under his breath. "I've been actually needing to talk to you for a while, but you haven't exactly been around."

"Sorry," she responded apologetically.

"Listen, can we talk? The three of us." He quickly confirmed. Jesus, did he really think I was _that_ big of an overprotective, controlling dick? I trusted my girlfriend enough to let her talk to whatever guy she wanted.

Even guys who happened to be ex-boyfriends.

See? I was chill.

"I don't have to co–"

"Come." He quickly ordered.

Emmett, who had been listening in, let out a loud laugh. Immature prick. I flipped him off before walking out onto the balcony behind the two of them, shutting the large glass doors.

Bella was was leaning against the railing with her lips pursed, arms crossed, and a soft expression on her face. Jacob was leaning against the railing opposite of her so that they were facing each other. I went and sat down on one of the patio chairs.

I mean, I'd feel like a complete douche if I walked up to her and basically rubbed in the fact that she was mine and not his. I wasn't _that_ clingy and over-bearing. Besides, I had respect for the guy. He did have good taste in women.

"I'll make this quick," he began with a nervous smile. "So I basically wanted to come and apologize to both of you for being such an ass the other day." The other day? That had been weeks ago.

Bella's thoughts mirrored my own. "That was a long time ago, Jake."

"I know," he frowned. "But like I said, you haven't really been around."

"Apology accepted," she grinned at him. Honestly, I didn't know what he was apologizing for in the first place. I would have probably done the exact thing, had I been in his shoes. I sent him an agreeing nod and half-smile. He looked relieved.

"One more thing," he added quickly. "I needed to do this in person because it was important, in case you're wondering why I didn't just call," the look he gave me was clear that what he had just said had been for my sake.

"Bella, I wanted to tell you that you have my sincere condolences regarding your mom. I am so sorry."

"Thanks, Jake," she whispered quietly, dropping her gaze to the floor.

It was blatantly obvious that he wanted to say more; that he wanted to ask millions of questions concerning what the hell was going on. Why waste a perfectly good conversation on _that_ particular subject? Especially since it really had nothing involving him in the present or future.

Shortly after, Bella showed him to the door as I plopped back down on the bed next to Jasper. He eyed me suggestively, making me roll my eyes. "Dude, what I would give for a bed like this. . ." he paused as a wicked look crossed his face. "Is it sturdy enough?"

"Fuck you, prick," I swatted my hand over the top of his head.

The five of them ended up staying well into the night, leaving just after eleven with the assistance and protection of the lovely escorts we had acquired throughout the day. Charlie was hard at work sorting this shit out, and apparently hadn't liked what he had found so far.

It had been a surprisingly refreshing day. Besides the whole 'not getting any sleep the previous night', the weird encounter with Jacob, and the fact that we were locked in this damn place, it had been a pretty good day.

Admittedly, it had been extremely nice getting to see Al, Rose, Jazz, and Em. It seemed like forever since all of us had all just chilled together. I missed that.

After a decent ten minute make-out session, Charlie entered the room and checked in on us. After he left, there was another make-out session, followed by bedtime.

Honestly, I probably would have given into Bella's earlier pleas from before had I not been so damn tired. Maybe tomorrow, I promised her _and_ myself silently in my head. Tomorrow sounded like a good day.

God, why did I feel like such a perv trying to decide when the next time I was gonna fuck my girlfriend?

"I don't think this is a good idea," I expressed out loud for the billionth time. She rolled her eyes. I loved the woman to death but in all honesty, half the time I wanted to strangle her.

"I'm not gonna fail the last four weeks of school," she told me, sliding on a pair of black skinnies. "And I need something to do around here." I ignored her pointed glance, still feeling uneasy about all of this as I slid on a hoodie.

"So lemme get this straight," I began. "You don't want to fail your last month of school, but you _do_ want to risk getting killed in the process? I mean honestly, Bee. Call Charlie. Have him give us an escort. I dunno, just _something_ other than this."

She pursed her lips. "Look, Edward, I know you're probably right, but I hate being so dependent on other people. I like to do some stuff without the help of others. We got by before on our own, so what's the problem? We're going to _school_. What is the worse that can possibly happen there?"

I was going to regret trusting her. I always did. With a defeated sigh though, I nodded, confirming myself into her plans.

"Besides, we'll be in and out of that place before anyone can blink. Just long enough to get our homework, then we'll be right back here. Charlie's got more than enough on his mind to deal with, and I don't wanna make him have to go out of his way for our sake _again_."

"Fair points," I gave her that. "But still. You better believe I'm not gonna let you out of my sight." She sighed with a happy smile and nodded.

I'm not sure how exactly we managed to slip by security, but we did. Which did worry me a little bit, but I refused to dwell upon it. After all, it could have just been our ninja skills.

Since we didn't have a car we could hijack – at least, none of them suitably shabby enough in the parking lot of a 5 star hotel – we ended up opting for a taxi. Good plan? I wasn't exactly sure. Being with Bella made it extremely easy for the line between good judgment and bad judgment to blur.

In other terms, before I met Bella, I always knew a right decision from a wrong decision.

The taxi driver dropped us off at the front doors and told us we'd have to call for another cab because someone already had called and was waiting for him.

The whole process took over an hour. Since we didn't exactly have a legitimate excuse we could _tell _teachers, it took a little longer to convince them that our families were starting the summer together earlier and leaving town to somewhere in Hawaii. Especially since it was senior year.

Our last stop was to talk to the principal and confirm it all.

Most kids were in the middle of classes so the hallways were fairly empty. While walking through the third corridor, some lone kid turned the corner and started walking directly behind us. The only reason I noticed this was because us three were the only ones in the hallway.

Also, he was wearing sunglasses and a beanie. Who wore that inside a building? Some teacher who was standing outside her door, looking out for skippers no doubt, smiled at Bella in recognition as we walked by but stopped the kid behind us.

"Excuse me, Sir," she began. "But we do not permit the usage of hats in the school, or sunglasses, unless it is a medical requirement. Please remove your extremities."

Curious for some odd reason, I slowed down our pace to hear the rest of the conversation. I heard the shuffling of clothes followed by a short silence. "Ah, Mr. Bates. I expect you've been having a good first week here."

I stopped, mid-step. First week as in just started here? No one started a new school with only a month of the year left. I couldn't help but glance behind me out of curiosity.

The exact same time I glanced, so did he.

The familiarity of the eyes I stared into was so startling, it almost knocked me over. Without a second look back, I wrapped an arm around Bella's waist and tugged her quickly forward, around the corner.

I stopped, facing her as the both of us leaned against the wall as soon as we were hidden by the confines of the concrete. "Edward, what's going on–"

"That guy back there? Definitely not young enough for high school," I knew this had been a bad idea right from the start. "I recognize his face. He was one of the guys who was in the room that day." She gave me a look of confusion. "I remember him from the day the Volturi caught us."

Her eyes widened. "Oh."

I frowned. "They must've figured out the both of us went here. Aro must've sent him to keep an eye out for us." I pursed my lips in thought for a moment. "Here's what we're gonna do. Go out back and find a car – any car. If there's _anything_ wrong, call me. I've gotta find out what this guy wants."

"Edward, what if that's not the best idea?"

"It probably isn't," I agreed, "but I'm gonna save your dad some work."

For once, she didn't argue. Instead, she quickly reached up, pulling my face down to hers and placing her lips fiercely against mine. "Be careful," she ordered softly. "Please?"

"Everything will be fine," I promised, squeezing my arms tightly around her before letting go. "I'll be out front in a few minutes. Don't let anything happen to yourself. Soyez coffre-fort."

She nodded; her big brown eyes full of worry. After she ran off in the opposite direction, I slowly walked back from where I had come from. Sure enough, he was just starting to walk away from the teacher who had stopped him before.

I leaned against the wall as he noticed me and picked up his pace. Moments later we were standing feet away from each other, face to face. He wore a victoriously refrained smile as I held my hand out. "Edward Cullen."

He shook it, somewhat confused by my approach. "James Tracky."

I held back a pleased smile, beyond smitten that I had just gotten this man's name that easily. Charlie would be thrilled. Well, not really. If I had to explain to him _how_ I got the name. . .

"Nice to meet you, buddy," I grinned. What the hell was I doing?

He ignored me. "I was wondering when you two would finally show up."

My smile quickly turned into a frown. I was starting to seriously worry that my plan hadn't been the most brilliant. What if there were others here? Surely the school's security was better than _that_. I hoped.

Shit.

"I was originally suppose to just wait and report to them when you two finally came, but, you know, what's the fun of that?" With a threatening smile he opened his jacket up just enough to reveal a small part of the gun he was hiding.

I gulped, keeping my facial expression completely blank.

"Now if you just tell me where your little lady friend ran off to, we can be on our merry way. Peacefully."

I couldn't help but laugh. "What the hell are you on?"

"_Gentleman_," the same teacher lady from before stepped out of her room once again. "There is no loitering here. Get out of my hallway or get to class."

"I mean it," he gritted through his teeth. "Come with me, and there won't be any trouble necessary."

"Is there a problem, Mr. Bates? Mr. Collins?" She asked sternly.

"Yes, ma'am, there is a problem. It's _you_." He told her angrily. I wondered how long I could stand here and stall. I was just waiting for a good sprinting leeway, and the front doors were farther away than I would have liked.

She crossed her arms. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me."

I watched the two of them back and forth, slowly inching backwards. At this point, I didn't know what I should be expecting. For all I knew, he could have already called up Aro, Marcus, and Caius and told them we were here. It was obvious that people were either already here or on there way. His evil smile told me we were only seconds away from being joined by a couple of friends.

"Now you listen to me, young man. I have half a mind to–"

I didn't stay long enough to hear the rest of her speech.

"Hey! Cullen, get back here!" He began shouting things frantically into a cell phone. "I wouldn't do that if I were you!" I heard him yell loudly at me.

As of lately, there had been many instances where sprinting was extremely necessary. I made a mental note that if I got out of all of this alive, I'd start doing more cardio in my spare time.

Out of no where, Demetri jumped out into view. Guess I would be lying if I said I was surprised. Lunging towards me, I quickly darted around his huge frame, stumbling just a little before forcing my legs to carry me faster.

I finally bursted through the doors, frantically sprinting down the front stairs of the building and to the street, whipping my head around to look for Bella. Where was she? I began to seriously worry.

They should have been busting through windows with guns, or maybe even through buildings with cars. Hadn't they been right behind me? I was starting to regret trusting myself when I had said it would be a good idea for us to split. . .

Suddenly, a loud engine came revving out of no where. I looked to my left to see Bella speeding down the street on some 'borrowed' motorcycle. I ran to the road where she pulled up to me in a screeching halt.

"Get on!" she ordered loudly.

Just then, more loud engines sounded in the distance, along with the peeling of car tires. As I jumped on behind her, wrapping my arms tightly around her waist, I glanced over my shoulder to see three black Mercedes in hot pursuit coming directly toward us, along with both James and Demetri coming out of the building as well.

Bella kicked the kick-stand up and in one swift motion we were back on the road. Even though I was fairly positive she had never driven one of these things in her life, she sure as hell looked like she knew what she was doing. It would have been quite the incredible turn-on had the situation been different.

Buildings and cars flew by us as we narrowly avoided the busy traffic at such high speeds. I looked behind us once again only to find them getting closer. This certainly was a new tactic for them.

She swerved sharply to the right onto another road, shooting straight through a red light and just barely missing the front end of a semi. If the Volturi didn't kill us by the end of this ridiculous car chase, I was fairly positive her crazy-ass driving would.

"Call Charlie!" she screamed to me over the loud engine.

Ignoring the fact that I saw guns being stuck out their windows, I quickly obeyed, reaching for the phone she had stashed tightly in her jean pocket. I pressed 2 for speed dial, and he answered on the second ring.

"Charlie," I spoke loudly and urgently into the phone. I didn't have time to explain what had happened. Just the current situation. "We're being chased. They have three black Mercedes, and we're on a motorcycle. They're pulling out guns. What should we do?"

"Where are you at this exact moment and where are you headed?" I barely heard him cover the phone with his hand and bark orders at people in the room with him.

"We're in the heart of downtown, past the high school," I responded quickly, just as Bella did another one of her ridiculously sharp turns, causing me to almost fall off the bike. "We're heading south."

"Hang in there, kid," I he instructed, "It's best _not_ to panic. . ." he paused for a moment. "Of course, Bella _is_ driving, so I take that back. . ." For a brief second, I thought I was talking to Emmett.

Charlie inspired me because of many things. One of them was for his ability to remain calm in a situation. Another was his ability to make jokes when his daughter was in jeopardy of being killed. If only I could have laughed.

"Got it," I responded before I hung up.

Just then, the sound of gunshots filled my ears. Bella continued weaving recklessly through the traffic, now swerving back and forth to make us a harder target. I refused to look back, knowing how close in proximity they were to us.

I heard the sound of both breaking glass and metal from the bullets straying into other cars. I prayed with everything in me that no one would die because of this.

We suddenly came to a one way road with a limited space to dart and swerve like we had been before. She kicked up the speed another twenty miles and hour and suddenly we were only on one wheel.

I clung on to her tiny body for dear life. I knew she would be the death me.

More gunshots sounded. I was just waiting for a bullet to hit me; my back, my head, my leg. I knew it was only a matter of time before their aim actually became valid. So instead of panicking to keep myself safe, I acted as a shield for Bella, preventing anything from hitting her.

A bullet flew by the side of my face. When I say 'by the side', I mean 'millimeters away from fucking killing me.'

Our whole bike almost rolled as we flew back onto a city road. I dared a glance behind me. One of the cars had disappeared. I wasn't sure if it was because they were trying to corner us or if there had been trouble along the way.

I wasn't even sure if Aro, Caius, or Marcus were even in any of the vehicles. These people could have just as easily been some undercover loyalties they had acquired over the years through their persuasive business.

It was a miracle itself that we were still in one piece. Usually, going at speeds over eighty in a thirty mile zone on not even a car would have fatal consequences.

Not for us I guess. Apparently today, luck was finally on our side. . .At least for the moment.

Suddenly two police cars and one of those big trucks without walls on the sides turned out in front of us. Bella sped up so that we were next to the truck. I looked over to see Charlie and some other man standing in it, gripping on to the poles in the center of the vehicle for balance.

The police cars slowed down, providing a temporary wall from the gun fire. At first we couldn't hear what Charlie was yelling to us, so Bella steered us in closer so that we were only feet away. There were more gun shots and more broken glass. I shivered.

"Bella, I want you to stay in front of us!" he yelled over the loud noises. "_Don't_ hit anything either!" He instructed quickly.

"Gotcha, chief!" she yelled back.

"Edward," he directed his yelling towards me. "I want you to jump on to here when Bella gets closer," he told me. I kind of just stared at him in disbelief for a few seconds. He noticed my hesitation. "You'll be fine," he quickly assured me.

Now why did I doubt that?

"Um. . ." I wandered out loud, "Are you sure?"

Bella, already hearing what she was suppose to do, began inching closer and closer to the large vehicle. I judged the distance, concerned at my jumping skills being a problem. Also factoring in being on a fast, moving vehicle with hard concrete below me and death machines when I didn't make it, I was a little more than concerned.

"You have to," he told me, already waving his hands toward where I was suppose to jump.

"Go, Edward," Bella urged as she did another one of her deadly swerves at the next four way. I almost thought we lost Charlie and the rest of them but they still remained hot on our tracks. More gun shots sounded from behind us. I gulped.

I didn't want to leave Bella completely unprotected, but by the options they were giving me, it looked like it was unavoidable.

"Hurry!" Charlie ordered once again with a frantic expression.

Bella moved the bike closer than before, almost hitting the truck. There was a little over two feet's distance between the two vehicles. I carefully brought my right leg over the seat so that I was sitting, facing the opening the the truck.

Holding onto Bella for balance, I slowly began getting up into a stand-up position. "Now!" both Bella and Charlie hollered in sync. Holding my breath, I did a quick little prayer in my head before jumping.

Charlie grabbed onto me and kept me from falling as I landed successfully from my epic leap. It took me only a few seconds to adjust where I was before I was eagerly keeping a close eye on what Bella was doing.

"Does she know what she's doing?" I asked him loudly over the noise.

"Not a clue," he yelled back. Well that was assuring.

The two police cars behind us remained in their positions as we made another sharp left. It was a miracle that there hadn't been any crashes yet. Bella stayed next to the vehicle, darting and swerving every now and then to avoid being a still target in case any bullets got through to her.

My stomach lurched when I noticed the black car make its way back into the picture. I leaned over the side so that I had a good view of what was going on behind us, keeping a tight grip on one of the poles in the center of the vehicle for support. When thought about for a moment, this was the kind of vehicle you'd think had been modernized from some sort of Star Wars movie.

We were beginning to exit the busier parts of the city, and I waited anxiously for Charlie's call on what the plan was. Every now and then Bella would glance my way and shoot me an assuring smile, giving me the false hope that she had a clue what she was doing.

I was a nervous wreck. How could I not be? My girlfriend was driving a motorcycle without a helmet for her first time in her life, going at speeds well over eighty, all while being shot at. I could hardly blame myself.

It actually got to the point where I picked up a gun from the floor and began shooting back. It's not like I was successful in hitting my targets – I had never used a gone before. Though I felt oddly powerful. . .

The other man who was with Charlie and I put a hand on my shoulder, pulling me backwards with a pissed expression. "What the hell are you doing?" he scolded, "We're here to protect people, not kill them, kid."

I glanced over at Bella as I watched another bullet narrowly fly by her head. Charlie saw it as well. I looked at him with questioning eyes. He shrugged. "He's right," he told me. "But technically I can't arrest someone who doesn't exist."

With a large grin on my face, I leaned my head out of the side once again, gun in hand, and began wildly firing that motherfucker like there was no tomorrow. Like I said – it felt good. Especially since this was something I had been wanting to do for a _long _time.

"We need to get you and Bells outta here and try and get these guys arrested."

I nodded. "Right!" I yelled back in agreement.

The gunshots all of a sudden stopped. In confusion. I leaned my head out the side to check behind us. All three shiny black cars had disappeared very abruptly.

I shot my head in the other direction out of instinct to check on Bella.

My whole body froze the moment I realized the black Mercedes weren't the only vehicles we had lost.

* * *

**CHAPTER SONG: **With You - Linkin Park

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Soyez Coffre-Fort - _"be safe"

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**Reviews are better than a sarcastic Rosalie.**


	26. Je Suis à Toi

**My oh my, where were we?**  
**Oh yeah. Bella disappeared.**  
**Right, well, it happens.**  
**...XD**

**So major thanks for all the love I got last chapter.**  
**If I haven't said it before (I have), I'll say it again. I LOVE YOU.**  
**It's crazy how much I live off of your guys' support.**  
**Thanks times infinity plus Edward AND Rob.**

**Right. Well.**  
**Bella's still in a predicament, so yeah, you should get on that. (:**

* * *

**Bella - ****Je suis à toi**

It was the most incredible feeling of adrenaline I had ever felt in my life.

It was scary as hell, but as long as I didn't think about falling to my death, it was really the coolest thing. I felt so bad-ass, swerving through traffic and what-not. I mean, it felt like I was in a James Bond movie or something.

The gunshots were freaky, yeah, but I just kept going. I didn't allow myself a glance back in that direction; didn't let myself think about how this could be my demise. I just pressed on, swerving through traffic at eighty miles an hour like it was the most normal thing on the planet.

I had no idea where I was suppose to be going – where _Charlie_ wanted me to go, or what the plan was. I figured there really wasn't one.

To be honest, I wasn't sure how the hell I managed to make it this far without any problems. By problems I mean anything along the lines of being shot, crashing, causing an accident, getting _into _an accident, falling off the motorcycle, getting caught, or even being hit by a meteor.

Of course, dying would ultimately be the result in each one of said problems, so once again, I tried incredibly hard not to think much about what I was seriously doing.

Edward and Charlie were somewhere behind me. Knowing Charlie, he was probably focused on catching these guys and busting their asses. Knowing Edward, he was probably focused on me; what I was doing and if I was being safe or not. I wanted to roll my eyes, but stopped myself.

He just wanted to make sure I was safe. It was the most flattering thought in the world, and I wanted to jump off my bike and hug the shit out of him for it. I realized that was always it with Edward. He was _always_ trying to protect me.

I had no idea why I always gave him such a hard time for it.

I took a sharp left, flying through a red light and earning numerous honks and angry yells. Still unsure of where I was going, I chanced a quick glance over my shoulder to see if I could get any instructions.

Panic quickly swept through me when I looked back and the only three cars behind me were the three Mercedes. I abruptly spun the motorcycle around before I knew what I was doing. Basically almost rolling the damn thing over, I sped directly past the three cars before they realized what I was doing.

It was way too dangerous to try and take out my cell phone to find out where Edward and Charlie had ended up. I had to go somewhere though, and I definitely needed to get off this crazy death trap.

Torn between whether or not I should go back to the hotel or to Charlie's office, I decided on the hotel because it was both closer and I knew there would be security there probably already waiting for me.

Too caught up in my thoughts, I missed the turn off for the street I was suppose to get on and ended up going an extra couple of blocks.

I was incredibly distracted by the possibility of my lovely friends showing up again; probably too distracted to be driving a motorized vehicle. I was actually starting to get seriously scared and beginning to doubt my driving abilities.

I was only about a block away from the hotel. It had almost been ten minutes since we were separated. Once again, I began to worry. What if something happened to them? What if they got into an accident or something?

Oblivious to the stop sign ten feet from me, I flew through it. . .well, halfway through it. Slamming on the brakes and causing the back end of the motorcycle to fly up in the air, I just barely avoided the biggest Hummer I have ever seen in my life.

I ended up flying off over the front end of the bike, landing on my side and rolling a good ten feet in the middle of both the cemented street and on-coming traffic. Disoriented from the fall and the pain caused by it, I could only cover my hands over my head and lay there, expecting ten cars to come and squish me.

I waited. And waited. And then waited some more. Nothing hit me.

Slowly as ever I rose my head up to see all traffic completely halted around my sprawled out body in the middle of the road. Stunned, I slowly sat up. Some people were yelling out their windows at me, asking me about my well-being.

Others were rushing out of their cars and running towards me, probably having just witnessed my pathetic little spill.

I quickly inspected myself. My jeans were all ripped and the parts of my legs that were showing were scraped up pretty bad. Nothing a few band aids couldn't fix though. My tight white hoodie was now dirty with patches of black tar stains and dirt from the road. Since my sleeves had been rolled up, my arms were pretty beat up as well.

My head miraculously managed to remain unharmed in this who mess, and the only thing out of place was my tangled, dirty hair.

Before I knew what I was doing or could dwell on the pain covering my body because of what had just happened, I was running. _Sprinting_, actually. I had to get somewhere safe before they came and found me.

The people who had gotten out of their car to help me stared speechlessly as I ran by them and onto the sidewalk, never once looking back at my borrowed motorcycle.

I frowned as I ran. I believe that had been Tyler's. He would always talk about how much he loved that thing during Trig. It had been the quickest thing to start though, and I knew at the time, we had to get out of there as quickly as possible.

Oh well, I guess I'd just have to buy him a new one.

I ignored my aching body parts as I willed myself forward. I could see the hotel and was practically in the parking lot already. I glanced behind my shoulder to make sure they hadn't found me. I sighed with relief when I spotted no black cars in hot pursuit anywhere within sight.

Finally, after what seemed like ages, I bursted through the doors, out of breath and ready to collapse. My arms and legs felt like they were on fire and my head was spinning.

All of that was quickly forgotten as soon as my eyes locked on a set of bright, familiar, green ones. Without a second thought I was sprinting once again across the spacious lobby.

Already running towards me, he opened his arms just in time for me to leap into them. He easily caught me and held me, squeezing me tightly to his chest as my legs wrapped tightly around his waist and my arms greedily clung onto him around his neck.

I refused to let go, slightly traumatized by what had just happened, and buried my face in his neck. "Holy fuck, Bee. Don't you ever dare scare me like that again." He ordered after a long moment and set me back down on my wobbly feet.

I spotted Charlie twenty feet away, both on the phone and talking to three other guys. His eyes found mine and his face became instantly relieved. Giving him an assuring smile that I was alright, I turned back to Edward.

His eyes stared into mine for a second before slowly trailing down the rest of my body. They began to widen as he took in my appearance. "Shit," his eyebrows furrowed together as he pursed his lips in a concerned frown. "What the hell happened to you?"

I debated on whether or not I should tell him. I sighed before shrugging. "Just a little fall."

He stared at me for a long moment with a worried expression. "Or a big one," he corrected. "How bad was it? Can you please just do the honesty thing and tell me how badly you're hurting right now?" His eyes grew immensely soft. "_Please_?"

"I'm fine," I lied. Truth was, every bone in my body was probably bruised, and I was just starting to notice now. Before, I had been too focused on getting out of there to really notice the magnitude of the pain covering my body.

"Okay," I sighed exasperatedly at his skeptical look. "If you really wanna know, I hurt like you wouldn't believe."

He cringed at my answer, giving me another once-over. "You're bleeding."

"Really?" I snapped sarcastically.

"A lot."

Just then, Charlie rushed over to where we stood. Edward became quiet, never removing his eyes from my face Charlie finally approached us. "Jesus, Bells." He quickly observed. "What'd you do? Throw yourself off that bike?"

I looked down at the ground. That might have just been exactly what had happened.

"No," Edward quickly denied, shaking his head. "No you didn't. . ._did you_?"

I slowly looked up at him through my eyelashes, frowning and giving him a tiny nod.

He groaned, bringing both hands up to run through his hair as a tortured look crossed his face.

"Hell, I don't know what we're doing still standing here – Bells, let's get you to a hospital and then on the way, you can explain to me why all of this happened in the first place." Charlie's tone was a mixture of harsh and caring.

"No," I quickly refused. "No hospitals. I just want a bubble bath and to lay down."

They both gave me a look that was clearly questioning my sanity. "Are you kidding me?" Edward said while at the same time Charlie chuckled. "That's my Bella."

I grinned a little, realizing how lucky I was to have the two most amazing guys in my life. I had been seconds away from losing it all, I realized, and the fact that we were all here now, safe and sound, put the biggest smile on my face.

"I'm serious," I continued. "Please? I'm sore but I know I'm fine. Besides, you know if I'd broken something I'd be screaming my head off. _Please_? I just wanna go up to the room and. . .forget any of this happened."

Edward looked like he wanted to punch me in the face for not wanting to go and get looked at by a doctor I didn't require. Well, maybe he was just a little right, but still. I didn't want a doctor.

Charlie thought about it for a long moment before finally relaxing his tense posture and casually crossing his arms. "Okay, kid, whatever you say. If you're really sure, then I guess I have to trust you. Sam says he's got a lead on one of the cars that had been chasing us so I'm gonna go check it out. Edward?" He turned to him with a pleading smile.

"Charlie?"

"Please for the life of me take care of her," he requested seriously. "Use your best judgment; give her an hour and if _you_ think she should see a doctor, call me and I'll come get her."

"Of course," he responded automatically.

He then turned to me as well, indicating that he was now speaking to the both of us. "You two," his eyes flashed between us while they narrowed. "Stay the hell in your room and I mean it. I'll be back in a few hours – probably later tonight – to check up on you. Apparently we have some things to discuss."

"Absolutely," Edward responded.

After he dismissed us up to our room, Edward wrapped an arm tightly around my waist, half-carrying me, and led us towards the elevators, not saying a word. As soon as we were inside the elevator, I rested my head on his chest, shutting my eyes.

"I'm sorry," I said quietly.

"So am I." He responded simply.

I opened my eyes. "Wait _what_? Aren't you gonna say 'I told you so'?"

I had to look and see his expression because his tone sounded as if I had insulted him. With grave eyes, he sighed. "Bella, I almost lost you today. I'm not gonna be mad. You're here right now – that's all that matters."

"God, I love you." I sighed, clinging onto him once again. Being with him made it easy to forget all the earlier events that had happened that day. "I am sorry though. I should have listened to you, and I was wrong."

He didn't say anything, just kissing the top of my head softly. I smiled widely as the doors slid open and we stepped onto our floor. "Go lay on the bed while I get a bubble bath ready for you." He told me as soon as we got into our room.

I nodded my head, gladly obliging to his request. I half-walked, half-limped over to the soft bed. I saw Edward cringe out of the corner of my eye and tried my hardest to make it seem like I wasn't in any pain at all.

I knew Edward more than well enough to know that my pain literally was his pain.

I curled up into the cozy comforter, shutting my eyes as I heard the faucet turn on in the other room.

I must have dozed off in my short period of waiting because all of a sudden I was being gently lifted off the bed in Edward's strong arms. He looked down and grinned at me as he noticed my eyes slowly open up.

The bathroom had a glass window completely covering one of the walls, revealing the city lights and a sunset. The window was appropriate because we were too high up for anyone to be able to see into it.

The huge bath – which looked more like a hot tub – was filled up to the brim with the most appealing, soft looking bubbles, giving off a creamy vanilla scent throughout the open room. I hummed in approval at the mere thought of how that would feel on my sore body.

I began discarding my dirty clothes. Edward gingerly helped me lift my shirt over my head, unhook my bra, and let me hold onto him for balance as I stepped out of my holey jeans.

He also helped me into the water. As soon as it touched my skin and my body was engulfed under the bubbles, I let my eyes flutter shut as I bit back a moan of approval. I wasn't sure I had ever felt anything so amazing in my life.

Well, that was a lie. I'm pretty positive I could think of a few other things. . .

There was a white marble ledge surrounding the whole tub which was connected to the large window of a wall. Edward looked relieved at my content expression as he studied my face for a few moments. He grabbed the remote from the other room quickly and flipped on the large flat screen mounted on the wall facing the bath.

Once it was on, he carefully got up onto the ledge space in between the bath tub and the window, sitting up with his back resting on the wall behind us with one of his hands falling casually to dangle in the water.

Had I not been so sore, I would have asked him to join me. Hell, I wanted him to join me anyways.

In fact, it was almost painful being naked in a sudsy hot tub with him only feet away, still fully clothed. There wasn't anything sensual about all of this though, and I knew that this was protective Edward, making sure I was okay and taking care of me.

I liked protective Edward, but damn it, sometimes sexed-up Edward was nice too.

I sunk further into the warm water, letting it heal my skin, humming in approval every once in a while at how fucking _amazing_ it felt. Who knew Edward could draw a bath.

Edward suddenly stopped flipping through the channels and stopped at the news when _my face_ appeared on the screen. It was my senior picture, and he quickly turned up the volume to see what they had to say.

"Chaos was just a small word to describe what took place in downtown Chicago this afternoon. Gunshots filled the sounds of the air from what appears to have been a deadly car chase." Edward and I looked at each other in shock as they showed a clip of the three black Mercedes. "Suspects involved in this haven't been discovered yet, but one of the victims of this lethal chase was no one other than the illustrious Isabella Swan, daughter of Charlie Swan." It showed my picture again.

"Others were involved, though names have not been made available. No word on how the well-being of everyone who partook in this dangerous event is." Then, God knows how they somehow got a video of me and my bike stunt.

I was suddenly watching myself flip over on a motorcycle in repeat. Slow motion, fast motion. Zoomed in, zoomed out. Watching it made me remember how painful it had really been. I shuddered when I saw how close the Hummer had been to colliding with me and how fast I had been going.

It was a weird concept, seeing yourself on TV. In perfect clarity, I relived the past hour by watching myself slam on the breaks of that motorcycle, flying over the front in the air, then rolling on the tar a good ten feet.

The video footage stopped after I had picked myself up off the ground and began sprinting.

I looked over at Edward, wary about what his expression would be. He stared at the screen, unblinking, open-mouthed with wide eyes. "Holy _fuck_," he exclaimed in a strained voice.

I watched his head slowly turn in my direction; his shocked, green eyes meeting mine. I didn't really know what I was suppose to say. _Oh, no worries, I'm fine – it didn't even hurt_.

He stumbled on his words for a few seconds before giving up and sighing. "Bee, I don't even know what the hell I'm suppose to say." His whole body was tense and rigid. "I don't even know what I'm suppose to _think_."

I wasn't able to soften the situation up because there was his proof. I knew he would check me into an insane asylum had I told him I was completely content with how I felt at the moment. It is what it is. I fell; it hurt. I guess whatever happened next just depended on his reaction.

He gazed down at me for a long moment before suddenly he was stripping out of his shirt. "That's it," he exclaimed, tossing it aside as he hopped onto the floor, standing up and shrugging out of his pants too.

I tried not to let my gaze wonder as his boxers were discarded to the floor as well. Before I knew what he was doing, he climbed into the bath with me and engulfed me tightly-but-gently in his arms.

His touch was what I wanted – what I needed. I'd have it anyway I could get. He pulled me onto him so that my back was resting against his chest and my head reclining back to rest on his shoulder. The bubbles tickled at my ears as I let my eyes fall shut.

He began running his hands up and down my arms as I relaxed against his touch. I hadn't thought it had been possible to feel better than I had just a minute ago.

"No doctor?" he breathed into my ear.

"No doctor." I shivered as he brought his hands up and began massaging my shoulders.

He planted a light kiss just below my earlobe. Once again, I shuddered. My body was reacting in ways entirely beyond me, and I couldn't stop it. I knew his intentions were probably just to give me an innocent little massage to make me feel better, but really now, what did he expect having the two of us in a bathtub together _unclothed_?

The soft rubbing continued as he slowly turned me into jell-o on top of him. I think I was extremely near falling asleep when his hand accidentally brushed against my left breast. I tried to stop the soft gasp before it left my mouth but was too late.

I was instantly awake once again.

I just barely wiggled my hips. Apparently, so was he.

His hands continued on as if that whole little exchange had never happened. I tried to as well, but it was too late. I was already achy and bothered. I shut my eyes once again, trying to ignore the absolute need I was feeling for him in that moment.

_His hands gently ran over my injuries, curing them with his magical touch_.

His hand slipped once again. I gritted my teeth together.

_The muscles in my neck slowly loosened under the strength of his sure hands_.

He moved under me just slightly, causing his erection to become even more pronounced. I stifled a moan.

_His chest rose and fell as his heartbeat pounded below me_. _The softness of his hands was better than any medication a doctor could provide_.

For the fourth time, his hand brushed against my breast. Figuring it was just going to be another repeat in the pattern, I tried my best to ignore it. A waited for a few seconds for him to retreat – to move it quickly away as he had done the past few times.

Instead, he slowly folded the palm of his hand down so that he was cupping it in his hand. I bit my lip, trying not to arch my back into his touch. It took ages before he actually moved his hand again.

He began lightly squeezing and rubbing and massaging it in his hand. It wasn't long before he brought the other hand up and was doing the same thing. The feeling was erotic, easily replacing any pain I had felt earlier.

All I could concentrate on were his hands on me; touching me.

He kissed just below my earlobe again, causing another shiver to course through me.

His voice was low, husky, and in my ear. "I love you."

I inclined my head back farther so that I could show him more clearly what I wanted. His soft lips overlapped mine as his tongue slowly traced both my upper and lower lip. His hands remained on my chest, right where I wanted them.

"I'm not gonna waste the chances I have with you anymore," he whispered to me in between kisses. "I'm not strong enough to lose you, so don't fucking leave. I need you. _Always_."

"Yours," I told him as I spun myself around on top of him; nothing separating us now but the hot, bubbly water as our bodies became extremely close. "I'm yours."

Without warning, he pushed himself deep inside me. My nails dug into his shoulders as I threw my head back and bit back a loud cry. His movements were gentle enough not to further injure my body, but rough enough to make me welcome the pain.

"_Mine_," he growled as he thrust his hips upward. I clenched my eyes shut as my forehead rested against his. One of my hands was still digging into his shoulder while the other was presumably inflicting damage to his scalp. I bit back a loud cry as his in-and-out movements became harder.

"Damn it, I wanna _hear_ you, Bee. Fucking scream for me." He ordered huskily as his lips mashed against my neck. Just as he said this, he pushed into me once again, hitting a spot I never even knew I _had_.

Involuntarily I cried out. I was well aware of what he was doing to my body. I wanted it; I _craved_ it. But most importantly, I needed it.

The water swayed around us as the bubbles continued to tickle my skin. I couldn't stop the moans, the shudders, the cries, the pleas that were escaping my body. I did what he asked – I let him hear me.

But I swear to God, if these walls weren't soundproof, I was killing myself before ever leaving the room again.

Edward was different. This was a new Edward I had never seen before. A dominant Edward. Everything from his facial expressions to his movements were incredibly different than _him_. His emerald eyes were smoldering with something unfamiliar; his jaw was mashed into a hard line as he kept his teeth gritted tightly together.

His actions became extremely different as the pace he began to set became intensely more rougher than anything I'd ever felt from him. Everything down to his husky, demanding voice.

For the first time in my life, I was _afraid_ of him.

And yet, I didn't want him to stop.

Ever.

I knew something was off with him – something I couldn't quite fathom. I didn't care though. I couldn't focus on anything other than the fact that I was beginning to unravel before his very eyes.

The muscles in my stomach slowly began to constrict as he continued to drive in and out of my body. He brought his mouth to mine, sucking roughly on my lips as his hands kept a firm hold on my waist, guiding me down onto him.

The line between pleasure and pain was slowly starting to blur as I clenched my eyes shut, crying out in a loud moan once again as I felt my orgasm quickly approach.

In my mind, this was right; this was what I had been wanting to happen for a long time. My mind saw nothing wrong with what was currently happening. My body on the other hand. . .My body was begging for release in more than one way. I was starting to realize that my body couldn't handle this.

Maybe Edward had been right before. Maybe my mind couldn't either.

My head fell to his shoulder and I bit down hard onto his skin as I came. He hissed out through clenched teeth, tensing his whole body as his orgasm shortly followed mine. Our chests rose and fell in unison as our bodies stilled.

For some damn reason, I couldn't go two minutes without crying. I wasn't sure what was causing my vision to become so blurry – whether it was the weight of the traumatic day, almost dying, being separated from Edward, or the fact that I could barely move a muscle in my body.

I hugged myself to his chest and buried my face in the crook of his neck, trying my hardest not to cry. If he saw me crying, he'd beat himself up about it when it wasn't his fault I was so fucked up.

I accidentally sniffed. He immediately pulled me back and his eyes widened as soon as he saw my face. "_Shit_," he groaned loudly before quickly pulling himself out of me and holding my face in each of his hands. His thumbs frantically began wiping them away. "I'm so sorry, Bella. Fuck, I don't. . .I don't know what _happened_ back there. Did I hurt you?" His expression was pained.

I didn't answer right away because I didn't know how. He took my silence the wrong way. You could literally see his heart break. He groaned, leaning his head back and closing his eyes.

"You didn't," I quickly told him. "You were right when you said I wasn't ready. It's me – not you."

He eyed me dubiously as he ran a hand stressfully through his hair. "I seriously don't know what the hell that _was_," he sounded appalled with himself.

"Edward, it's oka–"

"No, Bee, it's definitely _not_. That was. . .inexcusable. Too much has happened today, and I thought I had lost you at one point. Seeing all that stuff on the news. . .seeing you fall like that. . .seeing you so broken. Something in me just snapped. I got mad." He paused, shaking his head. "Mad like you wouldn't believe. At _them_. I just wanted to be with you – to get rid of all that anger, but instead, I just got. . .consumed by it."

What he was saying made perfect sense, and I knew exactly what he was talking about. I _knew_ him better than he knew himself. What he was describing sounded completely understandable.

I yawned, suddenly okay again. "I love you. I'm not mad at you. Don't you _dare_ go and mull this all over like I know you already are. Can we just got to bed?" I ignored the fact that Charlie was suppose to stop by later, hoping he'd realize what a long day it had been for the both of us.

He stared at me for a long moment, just looking into my eyes. I don't know what exactly he was looking for – I had stopped crying a while ago. "Yeah," he finally muttered, "Bed."

He got out first, wrapped a towel around his waist and quickly disappeared to the other room. Seconds later he appeared again with my big, soft, puffy, light blue robe in his hands. He held out a hand for me to take, helping me out of the tub – extra carefully – and helping me into my robe he had retrieved.

I smiled at the softness of it against my skin. Edward suddenly scooped me up in his arms and carried me into the other room, placing me gently on the big bed.

He walked over to the closet where he had unpacked his things earlier that day and threw on a pair of gray sweatpants. I studied his face as he walked over, trying to decide on if he was being hard on himself or not.

It was a long process before he finally got over to crawl in the bed with me, and I think he was stalling. First he got me two Advil to take and a glass of water, then he had to go and turn off every single light.

When I was finally in his arms, everything suddenly didn't matter. I quickly forgot how close I had been to losing this feeling. I nuzzled my nose into his broad chest. To losing _him_.

"Tell me something in French," I whispered to him, wanting to hear his voice one last time tonight.

He chuckled softly. "Je suis à toi," he whispered into my hair, planting a light kiss on my forehead. "_I'm yours_."

Words would never be able to describe how much I loved Edward. "And I'm yours," I told him.

As his strong arms cradled me against his body, it was in that moment that I knew he was all I ever wanted. There would never be anyone else. It was all Edward. Always.

I fell asleep only seconds after my eyes fell closed. Like whenever I slept with Edward, my dreams were nightmare free. I realized that Edward was like my own personal dream catcher. As long as I slept in his arms, the bad dreams would stay away.

I woke up hours later with the room still completely dark. The only light there was was coming from the lights of the city shining through the balcony windows. It was a clear night and the moon was full, also creating a dim glow cast upon the shadows of the room.

I glanced at the clock that read a quarter after four. The Advil had been doing its job, though I was fairly positive the source of my healing was from more than just the help of a pretty white pill.

Edward's arms stayed protectively around me, where they always remained during the night. I smiled to myself as I listened to his peaceful breathing. I wondered what he was dreaming of. Was he dreaming of me? Of us? Of a world full of nothing but carefree love?

I would have stayed up all night just to watch Edward sleep had I not been so tired myself. There was never a time I saw him more at ease than when the shelter of his dreams kept him safe from reality's bitter wrath.

There was a quiet knock at the door.

I checked to see if Edward heard it. He hadn't. He remained sound asleep as I carefully wiggled out of his arms, only grumbling a little when his subconscious mind noticed I was no longer there.

I tip-toed across the room, folding my arms tightly across my chest as I cozied into my robe before quietly opening the door.

I stared open-mouthed at the man before me.

"Bella," Carlisle greeted warmly. "Charlie told me I would find you two here. Can I come in?"

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**A/N: **Sorry, sorry, sorry. I promise you there WILL be a time where Bee and Ed can have sex without complications. Yeah. I'll make good on that promise, too. Now just think about it for a moment...You can't honestly expect with all they've been going through lately that there's not gonna be unecessary drama. ANYWAYS. Forgive me? I mean, I DID give you Daddy C, didn't I?

Oh, and one more thing since I know this is gonna be an issue: Bella takes birth control. That's why no condoms are ever used. No babies are coming. I boycott fanfiction babies. 'Nuff said.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Show Me What I'm Looking For - Carolina Liar

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Je suis à toi _- "I'm yours"

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**Reviews are kinda like surprise visits from Carlisle at four in the morning. You're not expecting them, but you love them. (:**


	27. Épargnant De Vie

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**I am so sorry for the lack of review replies last chapter. Like, REALLY sorry.  
I've had pnemonia for the past two weeks and have basically been knocked out on drugs in my bed.  
Luckily, this chapter was done before I got sick. Again.**

So since I didn't exactly get the chance to say it to you last week (I am NOT ignoring you, I swear. I really do.), I just have to say: Thank you so flipping much for your support towards this story. Your love and feedback has made the process of writing this such an enjoyable, unforgetable time. Thank you SO much.

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**Edward - épargnant de vie**

The room was dimly lit when I woke up, and I knew it was still early morning. I glanced at the clock which read seven thirty. I yawned, burying my nose deep into Bella's still damp, curly hair.

She remained blissfully asleep in my arms as I put my greatest efforts forth not to hold her too tight. I had already hurt her enough last night. I shuddered at the mere memory, still trying to figure out what the hell that had been.

I had been angry, I remember that with extreme clarity. There was something else that had possessed my body, and it scared me to admit that last night I had been overtaken by an overwhelming need to be in control.

I had been raging on a savage, I was sure, and I should have stopped before I had even let it began. Of course Bella wouldn't tell me I was being to rough – she _wanted _it and for some reason I couldn't fathom, she probably even _liked_ it.

Why did sex always have to be so damn complicated for the two of us?

I was going to forget that any of it happened though, and focus solely on the present. Like Charlie had recently taught me, dwelling on the past wasn't gonna change the future. So I wouldn't. I would just do some serious ass-kissing the next few days to get rid of any doubt in her head that gave her any reason to believe she wasn't completely, a hundred-percent my entire life.

As nice as she felt closely against me, I decided to get up.

I knew she'd be sleeping till noon after the day she had yesterday.

I carefully unwrapped my arms around her and slid off the bed. She grumbled a little in her sleep as she felt the empty space where I had been, curling into a ball as she snuggled her face further into the pillows.

After I threw on a shirt, I walked out through the balcony doors to look at the dark pink sky, just coming over the horizon.

It wasn't until I shut the doors behind me that I realized I wasn't alone. My heart stopped for a moment before I realized who it was. He was sitting on one of the chairs, looking out at the dusk as I had been about to do.

"_Carlisle_?"

He smiled at me. "Bella let me in early this morning. She went back to bed after I told her I'd wait for you to wake up." He read the other questions in my face. "I would have stayed somewhere else but all of this was last minute and I didn't know where else to go. . ."

I stared at him for a long moment, blinking. "Good morning," I finally responded, sitting down in one of the chairs next to him. For a hotel balcony, this had to be one of the best, I noted as I took in it's size.

A long moment passed by where neither of us said anything. Stunned by him being here, I honestly didn't know _what_ to say. I had never really adapted to the idea of this man being my father quite yet.

I wasn't sure why the concept of me having a dad seemed so off, but it just did.

"How are you?" I decided to break the silence. "How have you been, I mean."

"Confused," he responded honestly. "Torn. Undecided. Take your pick," he grinned.

"About what?"

He gave me a skeptically tight smile. "Guess."

"About _what_?" I repeated. I guess I kind of thought that after our little visit in Phoenix, he wouldn't want anything to do with me ever again. I mean, I knew he had made this whole grand speech about being apart of my life, but had I really ever thought he'd follow through on all that shit? Absolutely not.

"I saw the news today," he stated, straying away from my question.

More silence.

I finally groaned, dropping my head into my hands as I rested my shoulders on my knees. "What am I _doing_, Carlisle?" I sighed. "What the hell am I doing?"

"Let me ask you this, Edward," he began. "Look back to a year ago. A year ago, where would you have guessed yourself to be now?"

"Dead," I answered honestly.

"From the Volturi?"

I didn't say anything at first. ". . .No."

When you lived a life like I did – or had – a life without any purpose what-so-ever; without any reason to look forward to the future, set goals for yourself, or decide how you wanted to live, what exactly were you living _for_?

As harsh as it may have sounded, it was true, and back then – suicide had never sounded like a bad idea. No, I had never actually attempted it. Yes, there had been many times I wanted to.

The look on Carlisle's face told me he could see right through me, and knew exactly what I was thinking in that moment. He took in my one syllabled answer for a few moments of silent contemplation.

"What changed?" He finally asked.

"Stuff happened," I responded vaguely with a shrug.

"_Bella _happened," he corrected me.

That's exactly what happened. "Yeah."

"She saved you, you know." He told me in awe as he stared off into the clouds. The concept sounded so ridiculous to him, which was probably why he was so intrigued with the idea. "That girl saved your life."

To be honest, I had never once saw it that way. . .or even _thought_ about it that way. To my defense, I had always seen Bella as like an unavoidable force. Kinda like the eye of the hurricane or some shit.

She sort of just. . .happened. I guess after we met, one thing led to another and time moved by twice as fast as it normally did. Yeah, I fell in love. She did too. I never thought twice about it after I realized it was true.

Bella and Edward. That's what I always thought about. Us. I thought back to Carlisle's original question – _a year ago, where would you have guessed yourself to be now?_

A year ago, if some whacked, legit fortune lady told me I was going to fall in love with someone, as in _really_ fall in love, I would have laughed until I pissed myself. A year ago, it would have seemed like utterly the most ridiculous concept in the world.

Maybe that's what had been distracting me from realizing that what Carlisle was saying was right, and that Bella did save my life.

I knew she had.

She was my épargnant de vie.

And like me, I don't even think she realized it. All of these new revelations were really making me feel like such a piece of shit from what had happened last night. I was still trying to figure it out myself.

My caveman behavior would not go excused and from now on, I was fucking _cherishing_ that woman. I kept thinking it over and over until it was stuck in my head.

With a small, filtering smile, I looked up at him. "Yeah," I repeated, "I guess she did."

"I talked to Charlie a little on my way over here." He paused, "He says he wants to talk to you sometime this morning, by the way, so there's your heads-up. Anyways," he proceeded seriously. "He basically wanted me to put the fear of God into you, Edward."

I stared down at my hands in my lap, fidgeting a little before I ended up just crossing them over my chest. I had been expecting him to say something along the lines of just that. In fact, I probably needed it.

"What happened yesterday, Edward, was a perfect example of why you need to follow the rules. I know you've been on your own now for a while and doing your own thing, but it's different now." It sounded almost like he was scolding me. "It's not like that anymore, and there's people that can _help_ you. They can't help you when you're completely disregarding every direction you're given though."

I should have been pissed. He was telling me what to do as if I weren't capable of figuring out myself. Really, I wanted to be mad at him.

For some strange reason though, I couldn't. Instead, I felt. . .almost moved. This is what I had missed out from my childhood – the whole 'I only yell at you because I care' thing. I had never gotten that. Esme was way too chill to ever yell.

So this was what if felt like to have a dad.

I quickly hid my sudden admiration, not wanting to admit to defeat. "And why do you make it sound like I'm not grasping how incredibly dangerous all this is?"

"Because you _don't_," he replied with condescension. Okay, so that may have pissed me off a little.

"Are you kidding m–"

"If you knew how much danger you were in, you wouldn't have let Bella talk you into leaving the hotel." The look I gave him questioned him how he knew that. "She's so much like her dad. As much as Charlie would deny it, that's something he would most definitely do."

I didn't have a response to defend myself with. Yeah, I agreed with her to go. Not my finest moment. "Kay, you caught me." I grumbled. "But believe me when I say _I know how dangerous this all is_."

He could say whatever he wanted to me for the most part. He could tell me the clothes I wore were funny, I was a bad person for condemning so many people to such dreadful fates, I shouldn't have done the things I did after Esme died. He could tell me all those things, and I wouldn't care. I'd listen.

The only thing he _couldn't_ tell me, was that I didn't know. I knew. I fucking _lived_ it. I knew better than anyone else what a ridiculously thin, dangerous line I was walking, and I knew very well the consequences and outcomes some actions led to.

"Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I don't know, Carlisle," I sighed. "I know. Trust me, I know."

"Do you?" He challenged. "How did you feel yesterday? Being separated from her?" He asked bluntly. I couldn't help but blanch at the memory. "Not too great, right? Now tell me this – had you known there was any possibility she could die from leaving _before_ you left, would you have still gone?"

Fuck you, logic. "No, I wouldn't have."

He had just made his point, and the effort he was putting into not making himself seem smug about it was a wasted effort. For a fleeting moment, I realized that maybe he was right. . .with one thing at least.

I shouldn't have let her talk me into leaving yesterday. Bad idea. I got that _now_. But seriously, didn't everyone fuck up on judgment every now and then? What his whole little lecture was basically trying to say was _pull your head outta your ass and use better judgment next time, dipshit_.

"I get what your saying, believe me I do," I admitted, "but hear me out a little, please? Just think about what _you_ would do when a pretty brown-eyed girl pulls out the puppy-dog pout on you and may or may not have just a little extra cleavage showing to seal the deal." Holy shit, I can't believe I just told him that.

He chuckled, shaking his head with a grin. "Just gotta fight it, son."

I sighed, relieved that the heavier part of the conversation was done for the most part.

"You have my word," I sighed. "Tell him you have my word."

He smiled. "Good. Well, that's about all I needed to say. I should probably get myself checked into a room of my own."

"You're staying?" I asked incredulously.

"No, I just wanted to fly over for a nice little fifteen minute chat with the son I've never known." I rolled my eyes. Some adults' attempts at sarcasm were easily laughable. "Yeah, I thought Charlie could use a hand with you two. I wanna help out however I can."

"That's actually really. . .nice." I told him lamely. I didn't know how to put my gratitude into words. I was feeling so many different emotions lately that sometimes it just got me way too overwhelmed with myself.

He grinned, patting me on the back as he stood up. "We'll be in touch," he let me know. "Now get back to bed before she wakes up and you're not there."

Carlisle was actually kind of cool. I could easily see why him and my mom had gotten married. The more I thought about it, the more I realized what a male version of Esme he was.

I walked with him to the door. "See ya, Carlisle." Calling him 'Dad' probably wouldn't ever happen, and I was positive he realized this too. I waved after him as he left.

"Edward?" Bella stirred from the bed behind me. Fuck. I had probably waken her up.

I quickly crawled back under the covers with her, pulling her to my chest. "You aren't suppose to be awake yet," I scolded as I kissed her hair. Her sleepy smile made my heart skip a beat. "How ya feeling, Bee?"

"Surprisingly good," she yawned before nuzzling her nose into my chest. "Did Carlisle leave?"

"Yeah, he just did. Said he was gonna go get himself checked into a room then probably talk to Charlie."

"Did Charlie ever stop by last night?" She asked.

"No – I'm probably gonna go and talk to him in a little bit though." I told her.

"Without me?"

"Without you," I confirmed. "I want you to stay in bed today."

She frowned but didn't protest. She knew I was right. Maybe I'd even call up Rose and Al and have them keep her company. With Both Carlisle and Charlie now, I knew getting vital information to them had become crucial if we ever wanted to eventually squash this shit.

"Why are you up so early?" She asked as I brushed the loose strands of hair from her face.

"I could ask you the same thing," I responded dryly. "Now get back to sleep."

"Can you get me some more Advil first? Pretty please?" She fluttered her eyelashes at me.

I grinned. "Of course. Your wish, my command." I retrieved a glass of water and two pills for her, returning to find her sitting propped up, examining her arms. She quickly pretended that hadn't been what she had just been doing as soon as she noticed I had been staring.

"Lemme see them," I quickly instructed, reaching my hand out.

Hesitantly, she gave me her arm. "Don't get mad," she whispered.

I looked up at her, giving her a skeptical look. "Don't think so highly of me," I responded sarcastically. "Geez, Bee. What do you think I'm gonna do? Bitch you out 'cause you got into an accident and hurt yourself?"

She grimaced. _Holy shit_. . ._that's really what she thought_.

"Have I really been that pissy lately?" I asked in disgust with myself. She didn't answer. "Well if I have been, I promise none of it's directed towards you. I've just been so frustrated with the situation lately, and–"

"Simmer down," she quickly chuckled. "I realize that. I didn't say anything, did I? I was just apologizing again for not listening to you yesterday."

I relaxed, relieved. "Apology accepted."

"You sure?" she grinned as she pursed her lips. "And here I was, ready to have to persuade you."

"Oh?"

She shrugged. "Doesn't matter now I guess."

I knew what game she was playing, and I hated it. I actually would have stuck around and took her up on that offer, but I really did need to go have my necessary talk with Charlie. "And here I was, ready to kiss you." I mocked back.

She quickly backtracked. "Yeah? What's stopping you?"

I grinned, leaning down and pressing my lips softly against hers. I made sure this kiss actually _meant_ something, opposed to the urgent, desperate ones from last night. I cupped a hand around her neck as she let me kiss her, understanding what I needed to do.

Once I was satisfied that I had gotten my point across, I sighed with a smile as I shook my head. "You are so good with distractions. Now let me check you out."

She smirked.

"Shut up," I rolled my eyes.

She didn't look as beat up as she had last night. In fact, sleep had definitely done her body a whole lot of justice. There were scratches, obviously, but they'd soon fade into nothing along with the light colored bruises feathered across her arm. I was guessing her legs resembled her arms, so there was no need for further inspection.

"You'll be fine on your own for a little bit?" I checked hopefully.

She grimaced, shaking her head at me with a smirk. "I was alone eighteen years before I met you, dumbass. I think I can handle eighteen minutes."

BPOV

I'm pretty positive that I fell asleep seconds after Edward left the room.

My body hurt like hell, but it was definitely on the right track towards healing. I mean, I could hardly complain. From the fall I had taken, I probably should have been dead. I was never quite aware of my body's endurance until it was pushed beyond its limits.

After the bizarre incident last night, sleep was exactly what I needed. And by needed I meant _needed_. A whole fucking lot of it. So for once I just cleared my mind and let it wander to wherever my thoughts wanted to stray to.

The next thing I knew, I was sweating and panting, clutching the covers around me. The awful images wouldn't leave my mind as I began shaking my head, letting out another scream. Everything had been so _vivid_ just seconds ago. . .

"Bella," Edward's voice sounded far away. "Bella, baby, _shhhhhhh_. It's alright, it's okay."

I began gasping for air as I attempted to calm myself down. I wasn't sure I had ever experienced anything so utterly terrifying. And it had only been a dream! The most realistic dream I had ever had. I refused to shut my eyes, afraid it would replay itself in my head again.

My hands greedily searched around for Edward, clinging onto him and pulling myself to him as he sat next to me on the bed. I ended up sitting in his lap as his arms encircled themselves around me. He ran his hands up and down my back. "I've got you, it's alright."

I gave myself a few more moments to relax from my little spasm.

When I was composed, I sighed. "What the hell's happening to me?"

"We all have nightmares," he responded matter-of-factly.

"Nightmares are suppose to be with big, funny looking monsters chasing you around unrealistic scenery. _This_ was not a nightmare. This. . ." I shuddered. "It was so real. I thought it was real."

"What was it about?" He asked warily.

I paused, slowly raising my gaze to his anxious eyes. "You."

He let out the breath he had been holding. "Oh goodie." He responded, chuckling nervously.

I ignored him, continuing on. "You were in so much pain," I whispered, keeping my eyes locked with his. "You were dying and. . .and I couldn't save you." Hence the reason I had woke up screaming.

That's all I could really tell him. I didn't want to remember the details; I didn't want to ever recall the dream again. It had only been a dream, I reminded myself promptly. It wasn't real. It wasn't worth dwelling on.

"So how was your little chat with Charlie?" I asked, trying to get my mind on something else.

"Nonexistent," he sighed. "He wasn't in when I went to talk to him before, and he's been pretty busy all day. I'm actually gonna meet him down at the bar in a few minutes here. I wanted to wait until you woke up so you'd know where I was."

"The bar? You're not even twenty-one."

He shrugged. "Your dad's idea."

I rolled my eyes. "He would."

"Besides, technically I _am_ twenty-one. . ." he was suddenly digging in his pack pocket. He pulled out his wallet, searching through it. "On one of these ID cards, I am," he muttered as he finally pulled one out and grinned.

"Geez, I wonder what Charlie's kissing up to you for." I shook my head in disbelief.

He rose a confused eyebrow.

"Oh come _on_, Edward. You can't honestly think that Charlie Swan, head-of-fucking-security, wants to 'have a talk and a beer' with you just for the hell of it." I almost snorted at the idea. I knew my dad was cool, but this was really pushing it.

He frowned as he realized I was right. "Carlisle's gonna be there too."

"Well then. I'm sure upset I'm not getting in on this little get-together." I responded sarcastically. If what Edward was saying was true and Charlie was actually having the three of them talk around a couple bottles of beer, then I knew it was serious shit.

"Well I better get down there," he grumbled, and I could tell that he was suddenly nervous.

He gave me a quick, chaste kiss on the lips before leaving.

"Behave yourself," I ordered after him before he shut the door behind him.

He let out a loud laugh. "We'll see."

I sighed out loud to myself, rolling my eyes. Boys would always be boys.

An hour later I was still laying in bed, watching an old episode of _Friends_ when Edward came through the door. I was too focused on his pissed expression to really notice both Carlisle and Charlie walk in behind him.

He ignored me, plopping himself briskly down into one of the arm chairs as he glared down at the ground. Charlie sat on one of the ends of the large couch while Carlisle sat on the other. Both men looked completely at ease.

Unfortunately though, the same could definitely_ not_ be said about Edward.

The silence sat in the air until it got too frustrating to stand. "Will someone say something already?" I half-groaned. Edward's cold eyes snapped to mine and instantly softened. . .before they grew cold again and dropped back to the floor in front of him.

What was _his_ deal?

"How are you feeling, Bells?" Charlie asked lightly, blatantly ignoring the obvious tension between the three of them. Their little man date clearly didn't go as planned.

"Fine," I replied honestly.

More silence. . .

"Okay, _seriously_. What is your guys' deal?" Carlisle chuckled as I crossed my arms and huffed.

Edward gave me a 'do not go there' look. Charlie just shrugged. "Nothing at all." It occurred to me that from Charlie's perspective, that statement was probably true. He couldn't read Edward's beyond pissed expression, which was probably a good thing. The only reason I could is because I spent every waking moment of my life with him.

"We were just throwing around some ideas," Carlisle finally answered my question. Ideas? Huh, well I guess that made sense. So what was the problem then?

"What were the ideas?" I asked curiously, wondering once again why I hadn't been able to tag along?

Edward gave me another one of his scary looks. This one told me not to ask. Well obviously he wasn't going to tell me anything, leaving me no choice but to ask. I frowned apologetically at him.

"Well," Charlie began. "Edward's idea was basically to do what we've been doing. You and him staying here and hiding out," he explained. "And that may work just fine, but at the same time we really need this to be resolved. I mean, at the rate things have been going, you could spend your whole life in his room. They're smart enough to know not to come anywhere near here."

I could tell Edward _really_ wanted to say something, but he gritted his teeth in frustration and held it in.

"So like I said – we want to get this all resolved as fast as we can." He continued. "And now that we have a few more legitimate names, we're in better shape."

I nodded. I guess that made sense. As much as I loved being locked up in a room with Edward all day, I knew I'd eventually get sick of these white walls and would want my life back.

"Carlisle's idea was to bate them to us. You know, use you two to lure them into our clutches and what not. But," he paused, glancing over at Edward. "Edward was right to object to that idea. 'After what happened yesterday, a plan like that would definitely be too risky.'" My dad failed epically at imitating Edward's velvety voice.

"I agree," I quickly responded, easily siding with Edward. Maybe that _was_ the most effective plan, but I sure as hell wasn't gonna get myself murdered in the process of it.

"So, since neither of those ideas were exactly ideal, we came up with a good alternate." I glanced over at Edward's face to see him grimace. Alright, so when Charlie said 'we' he meant him and Carlisle. Got it.

"What's the plan?"

"So this is what we're thinking," Charlie began to explain. "Basically you two are gonna secretly leave the state while my team and I take care of things."

I thought about that for a second. It sounded pretty good to me. Why did Edward look like he wanted to break something though? I finally shrugged, "Sounds good to me, I guess."

Edward ran a hand through his already messy hair – something he had done ten twenty times in the last five minutes. Not being able to take the silence anymore, he quickly responded to my contentment.

"Tell her the rest, Charlie," he told my dad rather acidly.

Charlie frowned, knowing exactly what Edward was referring to. "Well, based on my experience with things like this in the past, the best way to proceed would be to have you go one way. . .and Edward the other."

Oh. Alright. Edward's irritation quickly became so much more understandable. Not only did it became understandable, it also became quite relateable. Come to think of it, I kinda wanted to break something too.

"Um, I don't think so," I replied to him matter-of-factly.

He rose both eyebrows in surprise as he frowned, clearly unhappy with my response. "They're way more likely to track you down if you're together. If we split the two of you up, it will confuse them. The fact is, they'll never know where you are anyways."

"Exactly!" I blurted out. "Which is why it shouldn't matter?"

"No, Bells, it doesn't work that way. Situations like these involve quite a lot of planning to an excess. We can't take risks, and we can't make mistakes. This is what has to happened." He was talking to me like a child, and I hated it.

"Yeah, but I don't think it's a good idea," I started to plead.

"Bella, you don't understand." He told me sharply. That was about the last slam against my judgment I could take.

I narrowed my eyes. "Don't tell me I don't understand," I muttered angrily as I crawled off the bed, walking over to stand in front of the window. I stared out it into nothing, trying not to think about what a shitty situation this was.

As much as I really, _really_ didn't want to admit it, he was right. This was his job; he knew what he was doing. So if he said jump, I would jump. Because he was my dad, and he knew best. Fuck him for being so right in all his rightness.

I took a few moments to calm down before I snapped at him again. Finally, I sighed, turning around to face the three of them again. "So what's gonna happen?"

"We're gonna get you each unregistered cars and point you in the general direction of where you need to go."

Was he serious? "Are you kidding me?"

"Someone will trail behind you, Bella, calm down," he assured with an exhausted tone.

"How long?"

He pursed his lips. "Indefinitely. I just want you two gone when we start hunting." I heard Edward quietly snort at Charlie's use of words. "It could be a few days, it could be a week, it could be a month. I really don't know."

I winced at the word _month_. Once again, I wanted to protest against this whole thing. At the same time though, I really didn't want to embarrass myself. How humiliating would it be to grovel about how much I can't be apart from Edward in front of my dad _and_ his dad.

He noticed my hesitation. "Listen, Bells. I'm trying. Tonight I'm gonna figure all of this out and have a definite plan by tomorrow morning. Just sleep some more and let your body heal."

"Alright," I mumbled, turning around to walk back to the bed. I still had my robe on from last night, hadn't showered or anything yet today, and I felt like shit. Maybe I _should_ go back to bed. Again. Seriously though, I had slept a majority of the day already.

Edward also looked like he needed some sleep. Or maybe a hug.

Probably both.

Both Charlie and Carlisle stood up to leave. "Edward," Charlie nodded to him with a smile. Edward didn't even pretend to be happy as he smiled back grimly. "Bells," he looked at me sternly. "_Sleep_."

"Wait, one more question," I quickly said before they left out the door. "When does this have to happen? When do we have to leave?"

His face fell a little as his eyes held sincere sympathy. "In the next couple of days."

I bit my lip, looking over at Edward.

That wasn't enough time.

**

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**

CHAPTER SONG:

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION:** _épargnant de vie _- "life saver"

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**Reviews will help my pnemonia go away. (:**


	28. Séjour Belle

**So here's my incredibly sincere apology which I owe you all.  
I AM SO SORRY.  
Gah, I have never in the history of EVER posted a chapter this late before. I promise, promise, _promise_ it will never happen again.  
School just ended for me so I am as free as a bird for the next free months and my writing time is going to be at it's max.  
I've lately just had so many finals to worry about, but don't worry, they're done with now. (:**

**So there's my apology.**  
**I am so so SO sorry for being so MIA lately.**  
**Like I said - I promise to be a way more actively involved participant in both the FF and the Twitter world.**  
**You guys can hold me to it even.**

**OH, and thank you so much for all the wishes to get well.  
They really did wonders and I am currently almost recovered.  
Ya'll need to shoot me a PM so we can catch up from all the time I've been out.  
You know how much I absolutely adore hearing from you, write? :D**

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**EPOV - Séjour Belle**

I wasn't sure if she was just being emotional or if she was really that upset.

"Edward," she sniffed, clinging onto my shirt and burying her head into my chest as she sat in my lap. "We can't. . .we can't be apart." I flexed my arms around her, tightening my grip. "You don't. . .understand. The only time I feel _safe_ is when I'm with you."

The crying hadn't started until a good hour after they left and the magnitude of what Charlie had said really set in.

On top of being pissed off with my shitty life, I was beyond frustrated with everything going on. My anger really was suppose to be directed towards Charlie for coming up with such a shitty plan, but as much as I wanted to be mad at him, how could I? He was only trying to help.

I just wasn't sure whether he really understood Bella and I's relationship; how her and I worked. As incredibly lame-ass and sappy as it was, without the other, we literally couldn't function correctly.

I mean shit, she had gone missing for fifteen minutes yesterday and I had been extremely close to losing it. By what Charlie had told me, neither of us would be able to be in contact with each other for up to a fucking _month_.

A month.

I couldn't survive fifteen minutes without the girl and he was expecting me to do a _month_?

My frustration quickly worsened as I sighed, pressing my nose into her hair and breathing in her sweet floral scent. Hell would be so big of an understatement being without her. I wasn't even being the slightest bit over-dramatic either.

Fuck. . .my life.

Okay, so in retrospect maybe it wouldn't end up being a month. Like Charlie had said – maybe it would end up only being a few days. _Or a few months_. Holy shit, I wasn't gonna be able to do this.

Bella sniffed loudly again. If I thought I had it bad, I couldn't even imagine what she was going through. And that was really saying something. In the past month or so, she had lost her mom, Laurent, gotten kidnapped, almost died like five times, just got thrown off a motorcycle, and now has to deal with separation from me – supposedly the one person who can make her feel better.

I really, truly, honestly didn't know what to do.

"Bee, it's gonna be alright, I promise," I told her softly as I gently ran my hands up and down her back. I don't know why I always lied to her all the time. Maybe it's because I was protecting her from the truth.

I didn't want there to be a single thought in her mind that had to do with the possibility of something happening to us, causing us to never be able to be together again.

See, that was all fine and dandy in my mind because I was used to shit like that. I wouldn't let her become like me and have negative thoughts constantly be ruling her mind. I knew how to cope and handle my own problems because I was so accustomed to having bad things happen to me left and right.

Not a single bad thing had happened to her before she came skipping along into my life. In the last few months, she has probably gone through just as much as I have in the last three years. Which was three years too many.

We laid on the couch and watched movies together as the rest of the evening carried on. Since Bella was still so exhausted, she fell asleep snuggled on my chest a little after nine.

I ended up having a long conversation with both Jasper and Alice on speaker phone, giving them the run-down of the last few days. I told them about the car chase yesterday – which they had seen on the news, I told them about how I had hurt Bella during sex – I didn't care if they knew or not, I honestly just had to get it out of my system and vent, I told them about Carlisle coming; the conversation I had in the morning with him and then the conversation Charlie and us had, along with the recent plans that had been plotted out to take place in the next couple of days.

The both of them drank in the information as if it were their own lives as well. I guess that's what families did though.

Evidentially, our conversation apparently require a visit on their behalf with a knock on the door no more than a half-hour after I had gotten off of the phone with them.

Quickly carrying Bella after onto the bed and tucking her in under the sheets without waking her up, I walked across the large room to answer the door.

As soon as I opened it, Alice opened her mouth widely to say something loud. I quickly reached my hand out, clamping it tightly over her mouth before her obnoxiously loud voice would carry through the room.

"Bella's _sleeping_," I hissed.

She glared at me before shoving my hand away from her face and pushing past me into the room. Jazz gave me an apologetic look before following after her.

She took my spot on the couch as Jazz plopped down next to her, casually throwing an arm around her shoulder. I sighed, easing myself into the armchair. Unsure of why this visit was necessary considering the amount of time I had just spent on the phone with the two of them, I pursed my lips in curiosity.

"What have you done to the poor girl?" Al muttered in disapproval as she glanced over at Bella's sleeping form. "I don't think I've ever seen her so worn down before."

I shrugged, not feeling like repeating something I had just told her no longer than a half-hour ago.

"Alice," I muttered in irritation before she could scold me again. "Why are you here?"

She stared at me, then at Jazz for a long moment, then back at me again. "We want in."

I blinked. "What?"

"You heard me," she repeated impishly. "Jazzy and I want in on your plan."

This was going down a path I didn't want to walk. "My plan? No, it's hardly my plan. If I had it my way, the plan would be a lot different."

"Edward," she sighed, "Stop trying to avoid the conversation."

"Maybe it's not worth having." I snapped, a little too loudly.

"Hey now," Jazz quickly responded with a nervous chuckle. "Don't be a douche and wake your lady over there."

I automatically lowered my voice. "You guys can't be serious about this," I stated, shaking my head.

Alice pursed her lips, determined. "You better believe that we're a hundred percent serious. Why else would we drive over here at ten-thirty? This is important, so I'd appreciate it if you'd just listen to what we have to say."

I would listen alright, but there was another person who needed to be included as well. "Alright, hang on a sec – I'll be right back."

I left the room, stepping out in the hallway to be greeted by the lovely two men in suits. I smiled politely at the both of them before walking to the room next to me and hesitantly knocking on the door.

"Edward," Charlie looked slightly alarmed. "What is it?"

"Nothing's wrong," I quickly assured him. "Alice and Jasper are here and I think their conversation requires your attendance."

He was a step ahead of me as he turned to grab his room key, slipped it in his pocket, and stepped out into the hallway, shutting his door quietly behind him.

"Bella asleep?" He asked curiously as I slid my laminated key through the slot, unlocking it.

"She's out cold," I confirmed before opening the door.

Neither Alice or Jasper looked surprised when they saw who I had gotten.

The conversation resumed as soon as we were all comfortably sitting. "Well," Charlie began. "What is it that you kids wanted to talk to me about exactly?"

The conversation went on for a good hour. At first, Charlie had been just as against the idea as I had. The more we talked though, the more he actually began to considerate the possibility of the idea. It was also extremely difficult to deny Alice of what she wanted.

Not wanting them to get roped into something like this, I had tried throwing around excuses. Theoretically, that would have worked. Except for the fact that really, I had no excuses to throw.

Their school had finished last week, so they had nothing on their hands but time.

In the end though, it was Charlie who made the ultimate decision. The two of them would accompany Bella and I. Jasper would go with Bella; Alice would go with me.

I was amazed that they could just agree to something like that willingly. Even after I told them the time period of separation was indifferent. I just couldn't fathom their drastic decision, but was grateful none-the-less.

"Edward," Jasper said as soon as Charlie left, "We are family. Family helps each other. And trust me," he chuckled. "We've been doing a pretty shitty job of helping you two lately. We wanna help now though."

I wasn't gonna be an unappreciative asshole and pretend I wasn't absolutely thrilled with what they were doing, so I sent them both a wide grin. "Thanks."

A few moments of silence passed by. Alice glanced at Bella before knitting her eyebrows together as a look of distress crossed her delicate face. "You two are okay, right, Edward?"

"What do you mean?"

"It's still happy, lovey bliss between the two of you, right?" She asked cautiously.

Yeah, aside from the fact that my presence was basically destroying her life, we were doing just dandy. "Yes, Alice. I'm hers, she's mine."

The look on my face as I said that must have been silently implying 'even though I don't deserve her, she's still mine' instead of what actually came out. Of course, Alice picked up on that right away.

Apparently, so did Jazz. "Edward, stop doubting yourself so much, man." He told me in the most un-Jazz like way. Lord help him if he had been spending too much time with Alice lately.

I didn't say anything, and Alice sighed.

"You wanna know why you two are perfect for each other?" She asked, "It's because you even each other out. Neither of you are anywhere _near_ perfect, but where one of you has a flaw, the other thrives." She smiled softly. "You bring out the best in each other and make your imperfections _work_." She paused for a moment, pursing her lips. "So next time you wonder how two people like you; two opposite people can be in love, just ask yourself this: Could you ever love anyone else?"

Her words were actually kinda moving. . .inspirational even. Shit that was heavy. "Uh, thanks, Al." I responded, staring awkwardly down at the floor. I decided not to give her the satisfaction of admitting to her being right.

Jasper sighed in exasperation. "You've been practicing that speech for a while now, haven't you, hon?"

She shrugged with a cheerful smile. "I knew he'd need to hear it eventually," she confirmed. "I mean, you know Edward – he's like an all or nothing kinda guy. I figured this was not an area he should be doubting when he's got so much else to worry about right now."

"I knew there was a reason I loved you," he gave her a tight squeeze, kissing her openly on the lips before grinning and pulling away.

"Ew. I'm still in the room. Just. . .stop." I grimaced at the two of them, shaking my head.

Alice's jaw dropped a whole ten feet as annoyance suddenly flashed into her bright eyes. "Edward Cullen, don't you even_ start_ with me. If I had a dime every time I caught you and Bella in an act of. . ._intimacy_, I'd be a goddamn _billionaire _by now."

"You know, it's really late," I observed, "You two should get home and get some rest."

Jasper smirked at me in disbelief. "Well isn't somebody _anxious_." He rose from the sofa, pulling Alice up with him. "Don't worry, we'll happily oblige to your request, your highness. I'm sure Alice doesn't want anymore dimes."

"Time to go," I snapped defensively while fighting back a smile at the same time. I guided them out the door before promising them that I'd let them know what the plan was as soon as I figured it out myself.

Despite the popular belief, I actually did need to get some sleep. The last few days had been so fucking _long_; mix that with my lack of sleep and my knees got shaky at the thought. It was well past eleven and I wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed with my girl.

I quickly changed into some sweats, disregarded my shirt, and carefully slipped underneath the covers next to Bella. I pressed myself up tightly against her; her back against my chest as I draped an arm around the front of her torso and buried my face in her soft hair.

For the first time in a long time, I successfully managed to achieve ten hours worth of sleep.

I laid in bed with Bella an extra hour before she eventually woke up. "Good morning," she grinned lazily, tilting her head up in the hopes for a kiss I quickly granted her. She yawned sleepily, reaching up to rub her eyes. "I need some coffee," she informed me as she stretched her arms out in front of her.

"I would image so," I chuckled lightly. "You've slept so much lately, I'm actually impressed."

She grimaced as a slightly apologetic expression crossed her face. "Yeah, I've been kinda a sucky roommate lately, haven't I? Sorry for being so. . .boring."

I smirked at her wide brown eyes before ruffling her hair. "You, my dear, are the farthest thing from boring I've ever known. Hush up or I won't accept your already unnecessary apology."

Since it was already almost noon, we ended up just heading down to grab some lunch at the hotel restaurant. As Bella ordered her cappuccino, the chair next to her slid out and was suddenly occupied by her dad.

"Mornin', kids." he commented pleasantly. "You two sleep well?"

Bella nodded, surprised by our recent company. "She was out cold for like eighteen ours," I informed him as he poured himself a glass of water from the pitcher on her table. "I think she slept just a little more than well."

"Damn, Bells," he chuckled in disbelief. "I bet you're feeling pretty brand new right now, aren't you? Your body recover all right I hope?" He asked her in all honesty.

I choked on my water. For a fleeting moment, I was purely horrified. Until I realized that he wasn't referring to Bella and I's _activities_, rather her little bike spill. The profound smirk she wore on her face told me my thoughts were blatantly obvious.

"I feel great," she told him with a smile. "Wonderful, actually." She shot me a very pointed glance. "In fact, I feel like I could do anything today – I just have _so_ much energy. . ."

I gulped, shifting uncomfortably in my seat. This was going to be a long meal if _that's_ how she was going to play it. I shot her an irritated glare. The innuendos she chose to drop around her father were definitely not appreciated by yours truly. Especially since I knew he wasn't stupid, and damn well knew he realized how. . .close his daughter and I were.

"Good, good," he responded, seemingly oblivious to the little exchange the two of us were having. "Listen, I came down here to let you to know that we figured out the schedule." He paused, glancing warily around the room to make sure there weren't any unwanted listeners.

"You'll each be leaving here early tomorrow morning. Probably like five-ish. We have cars ready along with fake registration and all the works. Bella, you and Jasper will be heading west and Carlisle will trail you a couple miles behind. That way it won't look so suspicious. Edward – you and Alice will be heading east. Billy, who you met the other day, is going to be trailing the two of you."

Tomorrow morning. My stomach sank a little and suddenly I wasn't very hungry. I had expected it to be soon, but I guess I had hoped soon meant just a little later. I guess it was better than putting it off for months on end. I sighed, staring down at the shiny porcelain plate before me.

"I've established ground rules but I'm not gonna go over them until tomorrow right before you leave." He let us know tersely. Once he was finished with his statement, he contemplated silently for a few moments on whether he needed to say anymore.

He didn't. Shortly after he was finished with his lecture he excused himself from the table. For the first time since he had sat down, I moved my gaze directly to Bella's. She was already staring at me. Her expression tugged at my fucking heart; all traces of the happy girl this morning gone.

"Bee, _stop_." I pleaded. "Don't look at me like that, you _know_ it's gonna be fine."

"Okay," she replied simply, the pained expression never leaving her face.

Once we got back up to the room, Bella subjected herself to the shower. I would have take one with her, had last time resulted in different consequences. I was still so cautious about crossing a line again. Last time it had been an innocent message which had verged on to become a rampage. I definitely didn't want _that_ to happen again.

Figuring today was just gonna be another lounge day, I changed back into what I had wore to bed. After I made a quick call to Jasper telling him what the plan was, I went out onto the balcony, relaxing on a chair facing the sunny Chicago sky.

No more than ten minutes later the sound of the sliding glass door interrupted my thoughts. I watched as Bella appeared in that fuzzy pink bathrobe of hers with her wet mahogany hair falling in ringlets down her back and shoulders.

Neither of us saying anything, she slowly moved herself to stand in front of me. Never tearing her big brown eyes from mine, she bit her lip and did the last thing I expected her to do on the planet.

My breath caught as her robe fell silently to the floor. The way she was looking at me caused the speed of my heart to race faster than it ever had before. Her eyes were encouraging me. She _wanted_ me to look.

So I did. Reluctantly, I tore my eyes from hers to trail slowly down her glorious body.

The hot sun sparkled off her damp, glistening body as I kept my jaw from dropping to the fucking floor. Her pale skin looked smooth as velvet and my eyes traced hungrily over her curves. When I finally met her gaze once again, my heart began to race even further and I was pretty positive she could hear it too.

She looked so confident – so _sexy_.

I wasn't sure where her sudden urge to do this came; whether it was because after tomorrow we'd be separated for an indefinite amount of time or simply just because we needed to have a time where we could get it _right_.

I blinked once. The sight before me was only the kind of thing you saw in your dreams. It wasn't every day that the most adorably, insanely good-looking girl just stood in front of you wearing nothing but her own skin.

I was suddenly extremely glad at the privacy the side balcony walls provided. We were too high up for anyone to see front on, but from the sides. . .We had neighbors. Let's just say that walls had never been more appreciated in my life.

Because I was fairly certain that if anyone ever saw Bella like this; like how I saw her in that exact moment, I'd have to kill them. Dead serious, no joke. She was _mine_. Only _I_ would _ever_ get to see her like this.

I was immobile. I couldn't move even if I wanted to. It was just that she came out of nowhere with this little. . .surprise. Everything had been going in slow motion before and at once, everything sped up again.

She slowly walked the few steps' distance to where I was sitting. Without warning she hitched one leg over the left side of my hip and the other over the right, sitting on me and full-on straddling my lap – totally, completely exposed.

"Holy _fuck_," I breathed, automatically moving my hands to the sides of her hips. My erection was pressed painfully between her hips and the restraining fabric I wore.

She brought both her hands up to the sides of my face, running them through my hair as she inched closer to me. "We're not going to be together on your birthday, so I'm doing this now." She leaned her face in until our lips finally met. "_Happy birthday_," she whispered.

My birthday was the farthest thing from my mind as I enjoyed my gift. She was giving me _herself_. Funny how ironic life was sometimes – I was already hers. I sucked viciously at her lips for a few seconds before I darted my head down, enclosing my lips around her very profoundly erect nipples.

She threw her head back, bucking her hips further into mine as a loud moan escaped her lips. I slowly drew my lips back up her neck and to her lips once again. Her hands ran along my shoulders, trailing up and down my chest as I shivered in response.

Her fingers hooked around the elastic waste band of my sweatpants. She leaned into my ear, her hot breath tickling my skin. "These need to go," she purred before bringing her lips back to mine. I groaned every time I felt our chests just barely brush together, nodding in response to her statement.

I was letting her lead. I didn't want this time to be anything like last time, and I certainly didn't want to do anything to hurt her again. With her still sitting _very_ comfortably on my lap, I raised my hips up to help her slide the only thing that stood between us, kicking them off as soon as they reached my ankles.

She gasped loudly into my mouth as she lowered herself down once again, brushing against my very obvious erection. Bella was wet. _Really_ wet. I removed one of my hands from her hips, trailing it down until I was hovering over her heat.

Very slowly, I ran my index finger over her exposed clit as her grip in my hair tightened and she let out a soft cry. Enjoying the lovely sounds she was making, I proceeded on to slowly repeat the motion a few times. Then, I gently slid a finger inside of her.

"Edward," she moaned as I watched in satisfaction her eyes roll back into her head a little bit.

As I continued working my finger around, my dick started to get really jealous. My initial thoughts whenever I had sex with Bella were to take things slow; make them special. Yeah. Well, I never really kept the incentive to follow through with that.

Being the impatient people we were, that wasn't all a bad thing.

So I removed my finger, connected my mouth with hers, thrust deeply into her, and gave her a little present of her own. After all, who knew when the next chance I would get to do this would be? Let's just say, I made sure that every surface area was occupied at least once in the next two hours.

She may have been giving me a birthday present, but I was giving her a 'I-love-you-and-we'll-be-together-again-really-fucking-soon' present.

"One more," she pulled my face back down to hers as I sucked on her bottom lip for another few seconds. We were gradually making our way to the door. I pulled away again, "Wait, one more!" she quickly protested before I ducked down to meet her eager lips once again.

"Okay, okay," I chuckled. "But, Bee? We're already like ten minutes late. We need to get down to the lobby." A bellhop had already taken care of all our packed bags and everything we needed was stored in our designated cars.

"Fine," she bit her lip and gave me those damn puppy dog eyes. "But one more? Please?" I willingly gave into her pleading, scooping her up bridal style in my arms, shortly brushing my lips against hers before she began softly tugging at my bottom lip.

Not breaking the kiss, I carefully set her down gently on the ground and encircled my arms tightly around her. "We really need to go," I whispered against her lips, resting my forehead on hers.

"I know," she sighed, fluttering her eyes shut. "I know."

I leaned down, letting my lips graze hers one more time before pulling away. Wrapping an arm tightly around her waist, we finally made our way down to the lobby where we were greeted by Carlisle, Charlie, Jasper, Alice, Billy, and a few other unknowns.

Jasper had Alice in a similar position that I had Bella in. I had called him last night after Bella had fallen asleep and we both made an agreement to prioritize the safety for each other's lady. He told me if anything happened to Alice he'd cut my balls off. I told him if anything happened to Bella I'd kill him. Literally.

It had been a nice little compromise each of us planned to stick to.

Rosalie and Emmett had wanted to come and say goodbye but Charlie had requested that they didn't, not wanting anymore attention to be drawn at five in the morning than already was. Had Rosalie not still been in grieving and Emmett not been comforting her, they would have happily joined in on the plan.

Unfortunately though, that was not the case and I was actually relieved that they'd be staying behind. If anymore people chose to involve themselves I swear I'd break something expensive. This was my problem. _Mine_. Yet, why was everyone so eager to always come to my aid?

Instead of going over the rules, Charlie had just printed an organized list for each group to carry and follow. I chose to wait and read them until once Al and I were on the rode, nervous I'd come to too many disagreements and start yet another argument with Charlie.

"Alright, so everyone ready?" Charlie asked as we all gathered in a circle. Bella rested her head on my chest and I flexed my arms around her in attempts of the reassurance I knew I couldn't put into her head enough times.

"Bella and Jasper," Carlisle began, glancing back and forth between the two of them. "You two will leave about ten minutes before Edward and Alice do. You're going to be going West, remember. Once you get on the road, call me and _only_ me for more instructions on where you're suppose to be going."

Jasper looked in our direction, noticing Bella who's head was still buried in my chest. "Bells, I'll take the first driving shift, comprendo? You, baby girl, need some serious R and R."

She shot him a small grin. "Thanks, Jazz."

Billy, who was apparently Al and I's 'chaperon' stepped forward. "Edward and Alice, like Carlisle said, you two will be leaving second, after Bella and Jasper get a good start. You're going East. Call me as soon as you're out of the city."

The four of us nodded. This was it. I looked down at Bella who was already staring up at me. Her face made my heart clench painfully tight as I noticed the moisture began to fill up her brownie batter eyes.

"Bells, say goodbye," Charlie instructed her softly. She never tore her gaze from me and it was like the world around us was completely forgotten.

"Edward," she whispered, reaching up to place her small hand on my cheek.

"Pretty please don't cry?" I asked quietly, placing both hands on either side of her face. My thumbs stroked light circles around on her cheeks as we looked at each other. I didn't give a shit in the slightest that everything we were currently doing was being monitored by the seven other people surrounding us.

She quickly blinked a couple of times, failing in the attempts of stopping her tears. "Hey now," I told her softly. "It'll be alright. We already went over this, remember? You can do this. _We_ can do this."

"Promise?" Her voice was no more than a whisper.

I nodded, giving her a half-smile. "Promise."

We stared at each other for another long moment before it was my turn to sigh. "God, I'm gonna miss you so much, Bee. You don't even know how much I seriously love the shit out of you."

For the first time that morning she smirked at me. "Charming." she teased before quickly adding seriously, "I love you, too. A lot. More than _you_ know."

I hugged her tightly to me once again, burying my face into her hair as I inhaled her sweet, unforgettable scent. "Be good," I ordered after pulling back a few inches to see her face once again. "Stay outta trouble and listen to Jazz."

"I will," she promised as I watched the water began to appear in her eyes once again. She was trying so hard not to cry that her effort was almost painful. "Don't do anything reckless," she instructed me with a very pointed glance. "And don't you dare find yourself another girlfriend." Her feeble attempt at a joke came out as more of a grimace on her part.

"Séjour belle," I whispered to her, stroking a loose piece of hair behind her ear. She pursed her lips, tilting her head to the side. "_Stay beautiful_, my beautiful baby."

This time when she blinked, a tear rolled down her soft cheek. "One more?" She asked with a heartbreaking expression.

"One more," I nodded, inclining my head down towards hers. As soon as our lips touched, I was actually scared that I wouldn't be able to pull away. I felt like I was home. She _was_ my home. She was all I had.

With one last look, I reluctantly let go of her and watched as she and Jazz followed behind Carlisle, disappearing into a revolving door.

And just like that, my home was gone.

* * *

**CHAPTER SONG: **Better Days - The Goo Goo Dolls

* * *

**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_séjour belle _- "stay beautiful"

* * *

**Reviews are my home. (:**


	29. CHAPTER 29

**So it's summer.  
Woooooopdy-dooooo. (:**

Love you all.  
And since this has already been quite the wait I won't keep you any longer.

* * *

Jasper was whistling to himself contently as we continued driving aimlessly on the freeway. For the past few hours we had been switching off drivers every now and then, both too exhausted to carry the task ourselves.

We were heading for our eighth city – seven others had already come and gone in the past three weeks. We couldn't stay at one place for any longer than a couple of days because there was too good of a chance we'd get caught, even considering the fact that we were in the middle of no where.

We would rent out either a hotel or motel room – whichever was more convenient at the time, and Carlisle would usually check in an hour or two later at the same place so not to draw any attention to our small group. Jazz and I always shared a room because I couldn't stand being alone at any moment. We'd end up getting a room with two queen beds because no matter how good of friends him and I were, it'd be incredibly awkward and inappropriate for him and I to share a bed with our significant other's miles and miles away. Not that I had any need for a bed any way. I never slept regardless of how tired I was.

We were somewhere in Wisconsin at the moment, I believed, and heading for the nearest remote town we could find. Like I said – even though we were a whole state away, it didn't help lessen or risk of being found by the Volturi one bit. I never realized how big of a production they had going. With all of their members, it was a confusing line to walk when deciding who was safe and who wasn't.

On top of constantly looking over my shoulder in paranoia, I was also empty. I missed Edward. More than impossibly imaginable. Jazz was good company and all, but no one could replace those irresistible, comforting arms. The realization of Edward's absence next to me at night was the main source of my insomnia.

Worse part of this whole thing was that we couldn't contact each other. Alice and Edward were somewhere in a completely different state, and unless an life or death emergency came up, we were not to contact the other.

Charlie was the only one we could call, aside from Carlisle who we met up with every other day, and I could never bring myself to have more than one-sentenced, one-worded conversations with him. I couldn't bear the hollowness his voice consisted of.

I wasn't the only one hurting though. Jasper was just on edge as I was about all of this. Him and Alice related to Edward and I in many ways when it came to how intense of feelings we had for each other. He missed Alice just as much as I missed Edward. Which wasn't possible, but he did.

So many times I had almost called him. Just to hear his voice. To hear that they were okay. The Charlie inside of my head always got the better of me though and convinced me to follow the carefully serious rules my father had given.

Besides, I supposed no contact was better than contact.

If they didn't call, then it wasn't life or death and they weren't in any danger. I tried to tell myself that was the case. That they were truly safe at the moment. But the voice of reason in my head always screamed at me that I was being too optimistic about all of this. After all, something horrible could have happened to prevent them from even calling in the first place.

Jasper's MPD had been substantially better lately. The doctors had finally seemed to find a strong enough medication that worked for him, and even on occasion when he did lose it, it would only be for mere seconds. Regardless of how much he missed Alice and how it affected his attitude, I noticed incredibly differences in his mood change. He seemed so much more relaxed and content now that he didn't need to be at a constant fear of losing it.

I began fidgeting in my seat again. I couldn't take this insanity much longer. I prayed Charlie would give us the word to come back home in a matter of days. The separation was literally killing me.

"Bells," Jasper stopped his whistling, "Get some sleep. I'll take the driving for a while, okay? You're so insanely tired right now. Seriously. When's the last time you actually slept?"

"I'm not tired," I snapped. "How do you know I'm tired?"

"Because," he chuckled, "If you weren't tired, you wouldn't have been mumbling your thoughts out loud to me." He reached over to pat me on the shoulder. Shit, I _was_ tired. "I miss them too." he told me with a sad smile. "You staying up won't make them suddenly appear. If Edward knew how tired you were, he'd be kicking my ass for not forcing you to get some sleep."

I grinned a little, but it didn't feel right. I sighed, "I'll try, Jazz. No promises though."

Even though night had fallen long ago, the darkness didn't affect my insomnia and just as I predicted, I did not fall asleep. How could I? It's not that I didn't want to, it's that I legit couldn't. As ridiculous as it sounded, I had gotten far too comfortable with Edward and I's sleeping arrangements before we had left town. Without him, I never felt secure enough to even close my eyes.

Another hour went by and I finally decided the radio would be a good option. The silence was driving me into an even further state of crazy. Too bad the fact that we were in the middle of no where enabled us to be able to get an actual fucking station.

I let out a frustrated, exhausted, sad sigh before slumping even lower in my seat. Jazz shot me a disapproving look before turning his gaze back onto the road, knowing that nothing he said would change anything.

Before I knew it, I was staring at the faded green digital clock on the dashboard that read it was one in the morning. Fuck. I needed sleep. I really did. Or else I'd start hallucinating. Lord knows _that_ wouldn't result in anything good.

So for the next hour, I made it my very ultimate priority to get some sleep. Any sleep. I think I might have actually been close to unconsciousness before my phone's loud rings filled the car. I shot my eyes open, feeling both excitement and worry as I dug around for it in the dark car.

Excitement because we finally got to talk to _someone_. Worry because of them calling at such a late hour. When I finally retrieved it, I stared at it a few moments before tossing it to Jasper. "Here," I wanted him to answer in case it was something bad.

He had the same, nervous look on his face I did as he finally answered the phone. I vaguely heard Alice's loud voice on the other line and after a few seconds of her talking, Jasper's face fell. My heart immediately sank as I watched his expression turn from shock to horror. I wasn't sure I wanted to hear this.

"_Wait_," he stated loudly, "Slow the fuck down and tell me what the hell happened again." Once again, Alice's frantic voice confirmed my suspicions that something was wrong. Suddenly, Jazz slammed on the breaks, spinning the car around and getting into the opposite lane we just were in – the lane that would lead us back to Chicago.

"I'm going to put Bella on now," he told her in a breathless, shaky voice. "Tell her everything that happened." He was already going over a hundred down the barren country road. With a grave expression on his face, he slowly handed me the phone.

I hesitated for a few moments before finally bringing it up to my ear. "Alice," I breathed.

"Bella!" Her voice was full of panic and tears. I _knew_ I didn't want to hear this. "Bella, I'm calling from a helicopter right now," she paused. Well that would explain the loud noise in the background. A helicopter? Why the fuck was she on a helicopter?

"Edward and I were getting some gas," she explained frantically, "We hadn't gotten any in a while so we stopped at some gas station in Indiana – in the middle of nowhere." I really wished she would just get to the point. "It was like after midnight so we assumed we were fine. . ." she trailed off.

I heard her start to cry again. "They were there," she cried as I froze. "Bella, they were there and Edward was shot."

No he didn't. Edward didn't get shot. It was impossible. He couldn't have. I was surely hallucinating.

My eyes watered up when I realized this was reality. "_What?_" My voice cracked an octave higher in hysteria as my grip on the phone became dangerously close to damaging it. I began shaking my head as I turned to Jazz with wide eyes.

His gaze fell solely on the empty road. "Shit," he began mumbling, repeating it over and over.

"Is he okay?" He was. I knew he was. He _had_ to be. The speedometer inched slowly up to one-twenty and I glanced out at the dark blurring scenery we passed.

She didn't answer at first. "_Alice_," I pleaded desperately, "Tell me he's okay."

"We're being airlifted to the nearest hospital that'll be good enough for what he requires," she informed me, "Charlie's meeting us there. I think it's somewhere just outside Illinois. We don't have legal identification so he's gonna help us with that too–"

"Alice." I cut her off sharply. There was only one thing I needed to know; the one thing she wasn't telling me. "_Is he okay?_" I spoke each word separate and distinct.

Her pause of hesitation told me more than enough. She finally sighed.

"He's got a twenty percent chance to live."

After the most painfully long five hours of my life, we were barreling through the hospital doors. After Alice's call and vague explanation, we hadn't heard anything since and had no idea on how Edward's well-being was at the moment. I had refused to stop crying the whole way, resulting in great fatigue and exhaustion mixed with an overdose of anxiety and a hell of a lot of heartache.

I was going to have to get used to it though because sleep was so far out of the question at the moment that it was almost laughable. Jasper and I basically sprinted through the main lobby, following the signs that lead us to the waiting room for all ER patient's accommodates.

It was only seven in the morning, so the room was practically empty. Along with a few other anxious people waiting, there was also Alice and my dad. Alice was curled up on her chair in a fetal position with her head buried in her knees. Charlie's attention was barely on the magazine in his hands, I could tell, as I noticed the large crease mark on his forehead.

I flew across the room. "Dad!" I hurdled myself into his arms without a second of hesitation.

"Bells," he breathed, squeezing his arms tightly around me.

I latched onto the few moments of relief I felt in his loving embrace before quickly pulling away. Not being able to wait any longer, I began firing questions at him. "Where is he?" I demanded, "How is he? Is he okay?"

Charlie pinched the bridge of his nose, shutting his eyes before letting out a long sigh. "He's in surgery right now," he told me quietly. "They're doing all they possibly can to save him." I tried to decide whether this was a good answer or not.

On the bright side, he wasn't dead. On the dark side, he wasn't okay yet.

I got off his lap, "I gotta go see him," I informed, wiping away more tears as I crossed my arms.

He shook his head gravely. "You can't. No one's allowed in that room other than the doctors," he paused. "The bullet just barely missed his heart, Bells. You have to know that there's a possibility that things might not turn out well."

I shook my head as more water formed in my eyes. "You're wrong."

He sighed once again, sitting up from his slouched position. "On top of narrowly missing some extremely important organs, he lost a lot of blood from a nicked artery – they're doing blood transfusions at the moment I believe. They've been in there for a good two hours. I don't know how things are going."

I glanced at Jasper and Alice, noticing their reunion had been both short and bittersweet. He now had Alice positioned on his lap and was trying to soothe her by stroking his arm gently up and down her back.

"How was he before that? Before he went into surgery, I mean?"

"Unresponsive," Charlie frowned as he watched my face fall. I could tell the more I pursued this conversation, the worse it would turn out being. I bit my lip, holding back a shaky sob as I nodded and walked over to the lady at the desk.

She gave me a sympathetic smile as I approached. "Do you know how Edward is?" I asked, already knowing she wouldn't be able to give me an answer either.

She shook her head remorsefully. "I'm afraid I don't, Sweetie." She told me. "The moment I hear anything though, I'll let you know, okay?" I nodded glumly, slumping my shoulders and walking away.

I took a seat between Charlie and Jasper, staring at the bleak room before me with a great deal of numbness. My big brother Jasper reached over and took my hand tightly in his as he shot me a small smile. "Bee, he'll be okay. Kid's been through worse. He's strong. You and I both know it."

I let my eyes flutter closed again. "I hope you're right, Jazz."

"I know I am." He confirmed. "He'll be okay, I promise."

There was something about the calmness in his voice that lulled me into a trance of hope. His words had made him sound so sure they were true, it was impossible not to feel as if they really were. Because I had no other choice than to believe they were. He would be okay.

I heard Charlie's blackberry vibrate and watched as he checked his most recent text. "Rosalie and Emmett are about an hour away," he informed us. "They're just leaving now."

I stared at him in confusion. We were at least two and a half hours away from home. He chuckled, "Emmett's a bright kid. I would have never even thought of letting him use a cop car."

I smiled, letting out a quiet laugh. "I hope you know he's going to have way too much fun with that."

He shrugged. "Kid deserves it. I'll bet he hasn't had a lot of fun in a while."

I wanted to get my mind on something else for the moment, but I couldn't help it. I had to ask. I tapped a delicate Alice on the shoulder. She removed her head from Jazz's chest and looked at me through her puffy red eyes. "What happened, Al?" I whispered. "Tell me what happened."

She gave me a look of bewilderment before her expression changed into sadness once again. "I don't know how it happened," she shook her head. "We were in some tiny town – the kind nobody except the hundred people who live there know the name of." She paused a moment. "It was just after midnight that we drove into the abandoned gas station."

I knew I wouldn't be able to handle hearing this, but I had to know. I just had to.

She gulped and silent tears began streaming down her face once again. "I stayed in the car," her voice cracked. "I was so tired that I was almost asleep. After Edward filled the gas tank, he went inside to pay. We were the only ones there besides the worker." Her words were becoming less and less audible as she began talking too fast. "He was walking back to the car," she remembered. "My eyes were closed until suddenly, he yelled my name."

I let my eyes fall shut as my whole body shuddered. "I immediately shot up in my seat and met his eyes through the window. I don't think I've ever seen them so full of panic." She wiped her eyes and sniffed once again. "Before I could see what he was looking at, I heard a gunshot." Her whole body trembled as more tears filled her eyes. "He fell down," she whispered, "And the next thing I knew, I heard the tires of a car screeching out of the lot and off into the distance. They left before the police could find a single trace of them."

All of this played out in my head as if it were some terrifying horror movie. Only it wasn't a movie – just the harsh cruelty of reality.

"There was so much blood," she cried softly as Jazz patted her on the back, listening intently on the story. "The worker inside had already called the police for us, but they took a long time to get there because of how far away we were from everything." She took a deep breath. "I did what I could to stop the blood but that wasn't much," she confessed sadly. "I kept him awake for as long as I could. I didn't think he would make it at first," she told me in a shaky breath. "Once the police came they had to call for a helicopter which took even more time. Even _they_ said they didn't think he would make it; they were surprised he was still alive."

The more she spoke, the more my heart sank. This story just kept heading downhill the more she talked. Where was the happy ending? As of now, I saw none. But I couldn't possibly think like that. As of now, Edward was still alive.

_This wasn't suppose to happen though! _Edward was the strong one. I refused to believe he had finally fallen. He couldn't have. He would make – just like he was suppose to.

"He went unconscious as soon as we got on the helicopter, but the paramedics were doing everything they could. They said the bullet went right above his heart so it was only a small percent chance he'd live. I called Charlie while we were on the helicopter and told him he should come. As soon as we arrived at the hospital, he went straight into surgery. That was hours ago though, and we haven't heard a single word yet." She finished with strangled pronunciation.

I guess that was that. I turned away, slumping even further into my seat as I stared blankly at the nothingness in front of me as I felt my insides rip and tear apart. I bit my lip so I wouldn't cry. If I started, I wouldn't stop.

A half-hour later a somber looking Carlisle entered the waiting room. Jasper had called him minutes after we had received Alice's phone call delivering the news. Since I was fairly positive that his driving had not reached the speeds of up to one-thirty, the hour delay between our arrival and his made perfect sense.

Forty-five minutes later, Em and Rose came through the doors. Their questions had been similar to what mine had been. I let Charlie take the reign and fill them in on as much as they could, because I couldn't even handle thinking about what had happened without breaking into sobs. They sat down as well with sad, hopeful expressions on their faces as they too waited.

Even though I was completely drained, I eventually got up to use the bathroom and stretch my legs. I trudged along the halls of the bland, vast hospital without an ounce of energy left in my body. I followed the signs to the bathroom very unsuccessfully and ended up getting lost numerous times.

Suddenly, two frantic looking doctors shoved passed me, almost knocking me over. "Hurry, they need help!" One of them said urgently to the other. I turned my head to watch them go – following their retreating forms with my eyes.

They vanished into a room only doors down from me. Curious, I dragged my feet over to where they had disappeared. I knew better than to open the door; someone was most likely in the middle of surgery.

I moved my eyes to the window of the room. Blinds were shielding my view except for one small crack of an opening. I pressed my face up to it, peaking through the small opening.

There were at least six doctors surrounding the patient lying on the table. Each of them had sweaty, stressed faces with frantically hopeless expressions. The two of them with their backs to me were blocking my view of the person lying on the surgery bed.

I watched all of them continue to shoot each other wary glances, yelling panicked phrases blocked out by the cement barrier between us. I studied them longer, noticing the ton of tubes and medical equipment each had in their hand. There was also a great deal of blood. Everywhere.

I studied closely the doctor that appeared to be the one giving orders. His face looked so sad, yet determined at the same time. He reached up to his face, pulling down the plastic covering his mouth. The next words he said weren't hard to make out.

"We're losing him!" I saw him mouth.

One of the doctors shifted to the side for a second. Long enough for me to see of flash of bronze hair I would have recognized from anywhere.

They were working on Edward.

He was the one they were losing.

My body seemed to shut down I sank to the ground, letting my body shake with broken sobs as my lungs seemed caught in my throat while I gasped wildly for air that didn't seem to come. I finally was allowing myself to grasp the dark possibilities of the future ahead.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **Set Fire To the Third Bar - Snow Patrol

_"I'm miles from where you are, and I lay down on the cold ground and I, I pray that something picks me up, and, sets me down in your warm arms."_

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_**Reviews are like prayers for Edward.**_


	30. Enfer

**If I didn't respond to your amazing review it was because I'm horrible at keeping secrets and I didn't want to spoil this chapter for any of you. Sincere apologies, and I really do love you all. Edward does too. So thank you for continuing to support this story - you have know idea how much it means to me.**

**Aw! Chapter 30 already! Geez!  
Well as of right now I'm planning on two more chapters and then an epi.  
****I've already started a new story which I shall give you all the details on shortly.  
Make sure you add me to author alert so you know when the first chapter's posted (which should be in the near future)!**

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**BPOV - Enfer**

Because that's all there was left to do from this point on – wait.

Seconds dragged into minutes and minutes stretched into hours. Lunch eventually approached and some kind nurses offered us food. While everyone else gladly excepted, I declined. I couldn't do anything until I was sure he was okay. I just didn't have it in me.

The room eventually became fuller as the seven of us remained in our seats. Every once in a while one of us would get up and walk around a little to stretch our legs. None of us really had the strength to carry on a conversation, resulting in a long, painful process of some more dreadful waiting.

Charlie had decided to take a short nap, as did the others. Besides Carlisle who had been pacing since the moment he entered the room hours ago, I was also the only one who passed on that opportunity. I was afraid if I shut my eyes, I would fall asleep, and if I fell asleep, I'd mis something.

Every time a nurse would walk in the room I'd get my hopes up, only to have them crushed when she ended up calling a different name out. How long was this going to take? Couldn't they fix him quickly? Would he be okay?

The questions in my head would eventually be the death of me if I didn't get the answers soon. Finally, they came. A nurse in blue scrubs walked into the room, holding a clipboard with a grim look on her face. My heart sank as I took in her expression, praying to God that Edward's name wasn't the one she was about to call.

"Edward's family?" She announced. I was the first one to reach her as the others followed closely behind me. We gathered in a small circle around her, each with anxiously tired faces.

She took a moment to stare at each of us before she finally took a deep breath of remorse. "I'm sorry," she finally said. "Unfortunately, he did not make it."

I was too shocked to process what her words meant. Maybe I didn't want to. My emotions were on-spot as usual though as my eyes began to fill up with impossibly more water. I gripped on to Charlie's side for support. Not Edward too. Not right after my mom. . .No. No he couldn't die. I wouldn't. . .I wouldn't let that happen. No.

"Wait," Alice was the first to speak up in a weepy voice, her thoughts in sync with mine. "That shouldn't have happened! That's not. . .not possible! He was so _young_."

Em and Jazz both had their heads hung, staring at the ground in utter silence.

I watched as the nurse exchanged a confused look with Alice, pursing her lips and reading something on her clipboard once again. "Uh, Sweetie," she began hesitantly, reaching out to place a comforting hand on her shoulder. "You do know eighty-three isn't very young, right. . .?"

Eighty-three? What?

A spark of hope lit up Alice's eyes for a moment as she quickly moved to the nurse's side, peaking at the clipboard she was holding tightly in her hands. Alice's eyes suddenly shot to mine as a slow smile spread across her lips.

"It's a good thing we don't know an Edward Cunningham," she declared with the biggest smile I think I'd ever seen.

We all let out one big, simultaneous sigh of relief and I thought I might collapse. After the nurse apologized a hundred times for the mistake, we all trudged back to the uncomfortable waiting chairs we had been sitting in for the past six hours. I allowed myself a few moments to relax. Until I realized how real that scenario could quickly end up becoming.

I think another hour passed before I watched a doctor in blue scrubs walk out to the waiting room. He wore a look of exhaustion as he glanced warily around the room.

"Edward's family?" He called out. The seven of us immediately stood up once again. This was my Edward this time, I was positive. He frowned as all of us quickly swarmed around him. "All of you are his family?" He asked with uncertainty. We all nodded without missing a beat.

I wondered how many different names Edward had in his lifetime. "Edward _Masen_, right?" My father quickly clarified this time. The doctor nodded. I held my breath, waiting for what was coming.

He took a deep breath before giving us an update. "He is incredibly lucky." My stomach finally unclenched as he said those words. "It was extremely tough for a while and at first, we were positive he wouldn't make it. We just couldn't get the bleeding to stop. It was a miracle that we managed to seal up his nicked artery and remove the bullet without causing any further damage, but we did."

"Is he alright now? Is he in any pain?" I couldn't help but ask as the words flew frantically from my mouth. I swear, after this was all said and done, a majority of my hair would be gray.

"Only a little," he responded with a half-smile, apologetic. "I gave him something just a little while ago and he's asleep now. He's fine, I promise. When he wakes up in a little while, you can go and see him."

I frowned a little. "Can I see him now? Please? I promise I won't wake him up. I just have to see him." I begged desperately. If I saw for myself that he was okay, I knew I'd be okay too.

"Just let him sleep, Bella," Charlie patted me on the back. "He's fine. You'll see him soon."

A smirk spread across the doctor's face as a look of amusement crossed his face. "So you're the illustrious Bella then?"

"Yeah. . ." I trailed off in confusion.

He chuckled, shaking his head. "The few times he was awake while I was working on him I was given many messages. They all generally were 'tell her I love her' or 'tell her she will always be my whole world'," he paused with a smile. "You get my point. He refused to believe me when I told him he wouldn't die, so I also got a lot of variations of 'tell my family I loved them and that I'm in a better place now'. Well, that's not _exactly_ what he said. He's a very. . .vocal young man."

"That's our Edward," Emmett grinned, "Always the optimist." I rolled my eyes at Emmett's very obtuse declaration, feeling light for the first time in a long time. He really was okay. He really would be fine.

**Edward**

There was a reason I hated hospitals. No one told you a damn thing and when they _did_ tell you something, that something was always only something along the lines of 'you need to get some rest so you'll feel better when you wake up.'

Right. Feel better. Somehow, I doubted that.

Sore was the understatement of the century when looking for adjectives to describe how I felt. My whole body felt like it weighed a thousand pounds, my chest felt like someone had taken a sledgehammer to it, and the parts that weren't hurting weren't only because they were too numb for me to actually feel anything.

I suppose it was only to be expected after being shot though. I was just thankful I was fucking alive after all of that. Right before I had blacked out, I _knew_ it was the end. Because the pain that had coursed through me as soon as that bullet made contact with my body was the most unbearable feeling I had ever felt. And I had felt a lot of bad shit throughout my life.

I hurt just _thinking_ about it. For the past seven hours, I had been in and out of it so many times I couldn't count. I was asleep one minute, the next I was getting needles stuck into me, I would end up asleep again, waking up minutes later to find the whole upper half of my body without a feeling, and so on. It wasn't a fun time. At all. And I fucking hated being so helpless and immobile.

On the bright side, this was the first time in that dreadful seven hours I could even concentrate coherently on a single thought I was having. Although I still could barely keep my focus. I was drugged up on so much meds that I didn't know what the hell was happening.

The numerous doctors who had been working on me all assured me that I was okay. I hadn't been so convinced at the time, but I had eventually come to accept the fact that I wasn't going to die. Yet.

Being in the excruciating pain I had been in, at the time I had just wished someone would finish me off themselves so I didn't have to feel that much agonizingly brutal _torture_. I accused myself of being melodramatic many times in my life, but this was definitely not one of them.

I fucking hurt. It was not an exaggeration.

Just then, one of my many doctors came in with a cheerfully bright smile, the first one I had seen in weeks. "Good news, kid," he told me with a grin, "We're done picking at your insides. All you gotta do now is sleep. Can you handle that?"

"I need some drugs first," I compromised. I would not be able to sleep this shit off unless they dosed me up on painkillers first. Regardless of how many I already had in my system, I needed more. A lot more.

"Fair enough," he agreed, digging in the cabinets to pull out the contents I required. Before I knew it, he was sticking yet another needle into my arm. "This'll do the trick." I instantly felt dizzy as the bland white room began spinning around me.

I was slowly losing consciousness as sleep began to overtake me. "If I don't wake up," I slurred. "Tell my family I love them."

The last thing I saw was his very illustrated eye roll.

When I woke up, I felt extremely rested, yet still totally exhausted. Definitely an odd mixture. The pain had slightly decreased, but it was still most certainly there. I knew it'd be a while before it went away, so I swallowed it up and learned to deal with it.

I could barely move from my position with all of the shit I had hooked up to me. It was ridiculous how many different needles were really necessary. The heavy pressure in my chest had only grown, making it slightly difficult to breathe. The doctors said that would happen though. Which, turns out, was beyond frustrating.

I glanced at the clock in the room, realizing that I had been asleep for over ten hours. Since my sense of time was long gone from the moment I entered this place, I could only guess that we were just entering the night. Granted, I hadn't exactly been _awake_ when I first entered this place. . .but still.

A nurse entered into the room with a friendly smile. "Ah, he's awake," she observed happily. "How you feeling, Edward?"

I gave her a skeptical look before proceeding to let out a deep sigh which only ended up hurting myself. After flinching from the recovery, I chuckled. "I've been better," I told her honestly.

"But you feel a little better now, right?" she asked quickly as her forehead creased in concern. "Better than you did before?"

I nodded. "Better. Just bored." I guess that sounded a little pretentious. I mean, they did all just save my life after all. I'm not sure what I was expecting entertainment wise, but I guess I should have started kissing some serious ass. So maybe the medication was fucking with my thoughts just a little. "Just kidding," I quickly stated with an apologetic smile. "It's just being in this bed all day. . ."

"I know what you mean, hon," she quickly responded. "I've got something that might cheer you up though."

She promptly left the room. I laid there, wishing I could just get out of this place. Suddenly, the door slowly opened up, revealing no one other than the only person in the world able to get my spirits up in such a shitty situation.

I hadn't seen her in weeks, and I felt my heart pound rapidly through my chest.

Shutting the door behind her, she stood in front of it staring at me with wide eyes. "Edward," she whispered with the smallest of smiles. I hadn't even known she was here. The only people who I was aware of being here were Charlie Swan and Alice.

I studied her face and frowned. Her eyes were bloodshot with huge bags under them, and they were also red and puffy. She looked like hell. Absolutely dreadful. Everything about her just screamed exhaustion and looking at her only made me tired once again. "Shit, kiddo. When's the last time you slept?"

Her smile faltered a little. "You don't want to know," her smile then became incredibly sad as she continued to stare at me from across the room. Her eyes suddenly became watery as I watched the tears began leaking down her cheeks.

"Aw, shhh," I said softly, "Don't cry. Come here."

She dropped her gaze down to her feet as she slowly walked over to me. There was already a chair beside my bed so she sat down in it, scooting it as close as it would go before resting her head gently on my chest, looking at me with a tragic expression. I ignored the light pressure the weight of her head was creating, just enjoying cloud nine at her touch I had been missing for so long.

"I didn't think. . ." she sniffed, "I didn't think I'd get to see you again. . ."

I managed to move my arm so that I could lightly stroke her hair. It hurt, but it was worth it. "And why would you ever think the impossible?" I asked as her wet eyes fluttered closed. "If you really thought some stupid piece of metal was gonna separate us, Bella. . ." I trailed off.

"I was so worried." She whispered.

I could only imagine what all of this had done to her over the past day and what I had just put her through. She was so fragile that I knew well enough this had all been incredibly hard on her. After all, she had just finally accepted the fact that her mom was dead. Deal with this right after? I knew _I _wouldn't be able to survive such drastic pain. As a matter of fact, her pain had probably even been worse than mine. And that thought absolutely killed me.

A few moments of silents passed between us as we took each other in. "Jazz kept you outta trouble I hope?" I grinned lazily. A small smile filtered at her lips as she gave me a baby nod. "Good. He promised me we would."

She never removed her big brown eyes from mine. I had almost forgotten how much I missed seeing them. "Gah, Bee," I finally sighed, squeezing her tightly in a one-armed hug that stung. "I missed the shit out of you."

She pursed her lips before giving me her first real smile. "Good." I couldn't hold back the flinch as she nuzzled her face into my chest like she always did. Once she realized her mistake, she quickly pulled away with an apologetic look. I gave her a reassuring smile. I was okay.

"Are you hurting?" She asked hesitantly, biting her lip.

I rolled my eyes, not sure what exactly she was wanted to hear. "I'm not gonna lie to you; being shot sucks. And since we don't live in a perfect world, yes, I hurt." I continued before she could say anything. "_But_, I'm better now that I got to see you."

She accepted that for now and gave me a warm smile before pursing her lips with a curious expression. ". . .How did it feel?"

"Enfer." I pronounced in my best, horribly bad French accent, knowing I would earn another glorious smile from her, the one that I had missed so much.

She did smile momentarily before her face grew quickly anxious once again for my answer.

Once again, I rolled my eyes. I wasn't exactly sure what she was expecting. That it was some walk in the park? I didn't know how to sugar-coat any of this for her, so I didn't. "Imagine how badly it was to be apart that long, then multiply it by about a hundred," I explained. Her expression became horrified as she brought a hand over her mouth. "See," I chuckled, "Why am I even tell you this? Don't freak out, I'm fine now."

"Promise?" She asked quietly, giving me a very doubtful look.

"Promise," I confirmed with a casual grin. "You know. . ." I quickly added, "I'm actually not. Did I not just tell you how much I missed you? Make it better, _damn it_."

A big smirked crossed her face. "So demanding," she shook her head in exasperation before standing up so she could get a better angle to my face. "You better believe I will," she breathed – her lips inches away from mine with a very prominent grin.

"That's my girl." I appraised with a wide smile.

She dipped her head down to mine, careful not to disrupt any one of my many IVs. Her soft lips molded around mine and suddenly, all of my previous pain was gone. I reached up, tangling my free hand in her hair and brought her face impossibly closer to mine.

"Mmmmm," I hummed contently into her mouth. It was hard to believe that I really had gone over three weeks without kissing her. It should have been a crime. Not only had I been missing out, I had also been depriving her lips as well.

Needless to say, I threw myself into it with maybe just a little too much enthusiasm than probably appropriate. Give a guy a break though. It had been three fucking weeks. She sure didn't seem to mind.

She eventually pulled away with a quiet laugh and a large smile. "What brought all this on?" she asked curiously. "I haven't seen you in this good of mood like, ever."

I shrugged. "Eh, near death experiences tend to do that to a person, and trust me – I've had my fair share of them. Granted, it took me a couple of times to realize it, but still. You get my point."

All I got for a response was her dazzling smile and one last kiss on the lips before she was back on her chair in a flash the moment Charlie entered the room. I cringed from just how close he had been to witnessing all of that.

"Edward," he sent me a very warm smile. "I see you're up and awake. How ya feeling, kid? She's not bugging you too much is she?"

He smirked as Bella grimaced. I ruffled her hair. "Nah, Charlie, I'm keepin' her in line."

He grinned, pulling up a chair next to Bella's as he made himself comfortable. "I'll be quick since I gotta leave soon anyways and apparently other people want to see you," he rolled his eyes, shaking his head dismissively.

"What can I say? I'm kind of a big deal." I shrugged with a smirk. Charlie Swan was hands down the most easy adult I was able to talk to. It was so obvious where Bella got her attitude from.

"Anyways," Charlie continued his original point. "Since you're obviously in good hands, I know I'll be fine to leave for a few days and catch up back at home before I come back here in a week or so. Plus Carlisle's here too. And since our lovely friends are most likely thinkin' you went all belly up, I'm sure there's no need to worry about them showing up here." His content smile faltered as distress crossed his face. "I promise though, I _will_ find the best way to make the six of you safe. It's my number one priority."

No amount of gratitude in the world would ever cover how much I appreciated this man. "Thank you _so_ much Charlie. For everything."

"Rest easy, kid," he told me, getting up and proceeding to give Bella stern look. "You too. I mean it. I've got all of you a room at the Hilton down the street if you need somewhere to crash. Jasper's got the room keys."

Bella grimaced, nodding and standing up to hug him. "Bye, Daddy."

After he was out of the room, I immediately narrowed my eyes at her. Before I could say anything she began desperately pleading with me. "But _no_! I can't! I _won't_. You cannot ma–"

"Emmett will forcefully take you there." I stated threateningly, still glaring at her. Before she could say anything, I rose both my eyebrows. "Don't doubt me, because I'm a hundred percent serious."

"But Edwar–"

"Bella." I frowned. "You can't stay with me. You staying out in the waiting room all night with yet another night without sleep will only make for an extremely tired and worried Edward."

"I just think–"

"Don't make me sad." I threatened, fighting back a smile as I pouted my lips out. It was nice to know that it _was_ in fact possible for me to win an argument every once in a while. Victory was bittersweet though with the knowledge that I would need to stay here by myself for the night.

"Fine," she grumbled sadly. "But what abou–"

"Emmett. Will. Drag. You." I growled.

She frowned very profoundly, hanging her head as she crossed her arms like a small child who had been denied a trip to the candy store. "Fine." She agreed sadly. "But I'm not leaving until I have to. And I'm coming in the morning as soon as I wake up."

I wish she could have heard herself. Her speech was slurred, her eyes were droopy. She needed sleep, no doubt much more than I would ever need in this stupid place. "Sleep a lot, okay? Besides, there gonna make me sleep until I won't be able to anymore. There's no point for you to come when I'm not even conscious."

"Yes there is," she disagreed quietly. Her eyes fell to the floor. "Edward. . .you almost died. I can't. . .I can't stand to be away from you. I'm not. . .strong enough for that anymore." When she looked up at me again through her lashes, her eyes were glistening with unshed tears. Embarrassed I'm sure, she quickly blinked them away. "Well I should probably go. Let the others come and see you. . ."

"No, stop." I protested quietly. "Bella, you're right. I don't want you to leave. I'm not. . .strong enough either."

And then, her soft lips met mine once again, the ultimate painkiller.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **No One Can Touch Us - Sing It Loud (ft. Alex Gaskarth)

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**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Enfer - _"hell"

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**Reviews are painkillers for Edward. (:**


	31. Hé Là

**Hola! I apologize for the lateness.  
Thanks for making my life with the reviews last chapter.  
They were simply. . .dazzling. Like all of you. (:**

**I HAVE POSTED A NEW STORY:**  
_Title: _Miserable At Best  
_Rating: _M  
**_Summary:_** Bella moves to Forks for her senior year and quickly becomes friends with Alice and the gang. Edward Cullen proves himself as less than desirable from day one, seemingly destined for failure with no intention of ever living up to the person he once was. But as Bella begins to see past the drugs, the mood swings, she finds the atrophy of a shadow belonging to a boy who had lost everything, including himself.

**^Please, please, _please_ check it out and tell me what you think.  
I'll be posting chapter 2 this Friday already, so don't worry about the wait. (:  
And most importantly, thank you all SO MUCH for continuing to support my writing. It means the freaking world to me, okay?**

**Back to TR - there will be one more chapter after this and then the epi.**  
***sigh* This has been so fun.**

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**EPOV - Hé Là  
**  
"Dude. Chill." Emmett chuckled uneasily. "She's fine. Actually, I think she's only a few rooms down from ya. Great, right?" I glared at his attempts of assurance as my head remained cloudy and unreasonably overwhelmed. Motherfucking medication.

He began laughing at my expression, shaking his head as he reached out to ruffle my hair. "Don't worry, I'll be her stand in." He widened his eyes, batted his eyelashes, and caressed my face with a dainty chuckle. "Oh, Edward," he butchered in a tone trying to resemble Bella's. "You look so sexy when you're all worked up like this."

I groaned loudly, clenching my eyes shut as he squeezed my cheeks tightly together. It may have been the most frustration thing in the world – being incapable of throwing a punch at that stupid smirk he had on his face.

I groaned loudly in dismay, dragging out the syllables. "God, I hate my life."

"Alice's with her right now, drama queen. Seriously. What the hell are you so concerned about?" I didn't know. I fucking couldn't think straight if I tried, _that's_ what I was just a little more than concerned about.

"Em, what exactly happened?" I gritted through my clenched teeth.

"Well we were just getting into the lobby, I remember–"

"Of course you remember, dipshit, it was ten minutes ago." I growled in frustration. He waited for an apology as he crossed his arms, let out a petty huff, and turned in the other direction. "Fuck you. I'm sorry. Go on." I rushed the words out.

"So she hasn't slept like. . .at all in the past few weeks. According to Jazz she hasn't ate a whole lot either. I mean did you see her? She was skin and bones, dude. So I guess they're getting some fluids into her system and shit while she builds up some strength. See? Nothing to worry about."

I sighed, a movement that hurt my lungs. "This sucks."

"Being shot? Yeah, Ed. I'd imagine you're correct in that conclusion."

"Being in here. In this situation," I corrected him, exhausted. "What are we supposed to do now? Obviously nothing's going to ever work. They keeping fucking _finding_ us." It was true. No matter what we did, how we did it, they'd manage to find a gap. It's what they were the best at. "I mean, seriously. I bet Charlie doesn't even know how the hell we're supposed to go on with this."

"If you didn't have a legitimate excuse not to be punched right now, your chest would be even more severely damaged than it already is." He shook his head, "Stop being so damn negative, alright? Things are gonna get better. They always do." I opened my mouth to protest but he held up a finger, cutting me off. "Yeah, I know, they don't for you," he put up air quotes. "But that's because you never let them. You're so insistent on how shitty of a situation you're in that you never even try and let yourself see the light at the end of the tunnel. Things have to get worse before they get better, that's all I'm saying." He finished with a casual shrug.

His incredibly obtuse statement caught me off guard. As far as I was concerned, I couldn't see the future. I had no way of knowing what was ahead of us, what to look forward do, but I did know that Emmett was right. Which was a definite first. I grinned, unable to keep the confusing smile from crossing my lips. "Get that from a fortune cookie, did you?"

He shot me a dirty look, narrowing his eyes. "Fuck you."

"Don't you wish," I muttered back, still grinning.

"I'm leaving now," he informed me, still glaring at me as he stood up. "So you can just lay here all night and fuck with that already overly complicated mind of yours all by yourself. . .without a friend. . .alone. . ." he continued the list of variations as he inched backwards towards the door. ". . .without anyone to keep you company. . .no one to talk to. . .That's how it's always gonna be, bro." He clarified promptly before swinging the door shut behind him.

It was the first time my head had been remotely clear since I had blacked out how many hours ago. How many _days _ago had it been? Too many. I was so sick of these white walls that my own 'complicated mind' was becoming hard to listen to. I wanted to go back to how it had been before. As unsafe as it may have been, what Bella and I had done had been the best thing for the two of us. Whether we had been camped out on the futon together or locked up in her colossal house, we had always been able to enjoy the company of each other.

This separation? It wasn't good for either her or I. I just wanted to do something, go somewhere, so that we could get back what we used to have. Killing time, simply wasting it with each other. I had never really realized how good we had had it. Aside from the obvious issues we were required to run from, things were usually great. Usually. At least, great in the definition of me.

I tried to come to a conclusion in my head as to how the Volturi had managed to find Alice and I. My guesses were limited, as was my imagination. Plain and simple, I figured it had been some sort of small, silly slip-up on our behalf that had somehow ended up giving them a lead.

The whole gun concept had been totally knew for them. I knew the three, and I knew Aro. I knew him well enough to know that he wanted me dead in the most satisfying way possible. A bullet hardly seemed that creative. Which lead me to believe that they had both grown desperate and discovered Charlie's participation that they just wanted me to be done with in any way possible. Honestly, they should have succeeded in what they had planned on doing that night. The fact that I was alive was beyond a miracle as was the fact that I would be able to basically walk away from all of this unharmed.

This was where it got tricky. They were skilled in what they did, very proficient assassins when they wanted to be, that they rarely failed in their intentions. When I was shot precisely where they intended the bullet to go, they knew like I had at the time that it was right where it needed to be in order to fulfill their ever-lasting mission. They hadn't stuck around long enough to declare me dead or anything, but I knew they probably assumed I was.

Unlike Marcus and Caius, Aro would want to clarify my absence until victory was pronounced. I expected as much. Which was why it still wasn't safe for either Bella or I.

I tried out Emmett's suggestion and began working out a positive scenario in my mind. It was hard, but pretty soon ideas began freely flowing. Charlie was more than capable of achieving a lot of things, being in the position he was in. It'd be extremely easy for him to put numerous cover stories in the news, concerning the well-beings of either Bella or myself. We'd improve our hiding tactics until we were as safe as possible. The point was, we would be able to figure something out. For the first time in an incredibly long time, I was hopeful.

Because soon Bella would be okay, I'd be able to leave this place, and Charlie and Carlisle would have another plan. We would be okay. We had to be okay. We had been through way too much not to.

I was give more morphine before another twelve-hour nap followed. I could feel my body slowly start to regain its strength as the hole in my chest began to heal. When I woke up, I was able to move a lot more than I had been, there was less pressure in my lungs whenever I would breath, and the unbearably frustrating heavy feeling was starting to disappear from my chest. See? It was a sign.

I was starving but they wouldn't let me eat much of anything other than water due to some complex organ disorder I was currently suffering in the process of healing the bullet wound. Carlisle was sitting in the chair next to my bed when my eyes finally decided to open.

I had to start getting used to his frequency in my life now, apparently.

"How are you feeling?" He asked when he noticed I had woken up.

I yawned, running the hand that wasn't tweaked with five hundred chords through my disheveled hair. "That's such a reoccurring question." I chuckled, shaking my head. "I'm feelin' just peachy, thanks."

A small smirk filtered at his lips. "Emmett told me you'd say something along those lines."

I sighed. Of course Emmett did. "Never been better," I continued on suspiciously as I watched his lips mirror mine perfectly. "Life's great." We finished together in perfect unison. I grimaced. "Damn it, Emmett." I muttered under my breath which he also echoed.

"He's good," Carlisle admitted with a grin.

I decided to pass on giving Em any sort of a compliment. "So how's Bella doing?"

He bit his lip, and I could have sworn he was trying to keep himself from laughing. "He's got you down to a tee, you know."

_Oh, for the love of God_. I groaned loudly, clenching my eyes tightly shut before bringing my palm up to my face. "If there was one good thing that came out of that damn three weeks–" I paused, inhaling a big breath of air. "I hate him."

"She's doing just fine, I promise." He answered, ignoring my irritation. "Really good, actually. They actually think she's going to be able to check out sometime this evening." I glanced at the clock on the wall that read it was two. So only a few more hours until I got to see her again.

"Any news on when _I'm_ going to be able to check out?" I asked hopefully, already knowing the answer.

He chuckled, shaking his head. "You don't even want to hear that answer," he informed me. I narrowed my eyes at his contentment and he quickly backtracked. "But hey," he continued, "At least you're alive right? What's a month in the hospital going to do to you?" My jaw literally dropped at the fucking horrific implications of the word _month_. Once again, realizing he had fucked up, he quickly backtracked. "But, you know, it's going to just fly by. . ." His words came out rushed and even he grimaced at the lack of assurance he was able to provide. "Sorry," he frowned simply.

I sighed. "Yeah, I know."

"Well, I should probably let you rest some more," he implied hesitantly before he began to rise from his chair.

I groaned, pulling at my hair some more. "All I've been doing is _resting_," I hissed, my frustration not intentionally directed at him. "And I absolutely hate doing nothing." It was slightly hypocritical of me to say, but true none-the-less. It wasn't even the fact that I was doing nothing the bothered me. It was the fact that I literally was doing. . .nothing. Not moving, not eating. Just fucking nothing.

"Er, well, I know that, Edward." He paused in the doorway. "But unless you want to prolong that month, I suggest you, ya know, keep resting. Who knows?" He lied again, "Maybe it'll only be a week."

A nurse must have caught the last part of our conversation because as soon as Carlisle left, she came in and took his place. Only instead of providing me with conversation I needed, she provided me with more medication that I _didn't_ need, and I was back asleep again before I could say so much as a word of protest.

I came to the upsetting realization before I blacked out once again that this cycle would only become more consistent as the days passed. Yeah. One month of this my ass.

**BPOV**

I paused in front of the closed door, hesitant. Alice told me he would be sleeping and I knew she was right. I would be fine. I would just sit in that chair next to his bed and wait for him to wake up. But then what? I was actually slightly terrified of the lecture I knew I would be receiving. He had obviously heard about my little mishap. He was most definitely not too happy with what had brought it on.

I sucked in a deep breath before twisting the handle open and entering the room. It looked exactly the same as when I had last entered it, right down to the position of Edward's arms. I studied him as I slowly sat myself down on the hard plastic.

His face was so peaceful. With his hair messier than ever, falling over his face from it being longer than I had ever seen it, and his lips slightly parted, I was smiling without any incentive as to the cause. The muscles in my face seemed just as confused as I was about the wide grin I could barely pry from my face after so many weeks of atrophy.

I felt much more alive than I had in the past month. I wouldn't be able to fall asleep even if I wanted to. I wasn't sure how Edward was dealing with all of this – he was sleeping basically at all times, and when he _was_ awake, they ordered him to go back to sleep. I knew Edward way too well to know how much he absolutely couldn't stand all of this. He hated being so helpless. It made him frustrated, grumpy, and overall dejected. I hated seeing him like that.

I carefully reached my hand out, smoothing the loose strands of copper hair from his face. My fingers relished in its never-ending softness as I repeated my stroking motion. He let out a loud sigh in his sleep and the slightest signs of a smile made it to his lips. The images my mind had concurred up during our separation had not done him any justice. But it was okay now. Because he was here with me, as beautiful looking as ever.

I couldn't stop myself from getting closer to him. I craved it. I _needed_ it. His hospital bed was large enough that the open space next to him was easily wide enough for another person to occupy. I crawled over him with great caution, making sure not to disturb any of the IVs that occupied the entire right side of his body. I laid myself down next to him, nuzzling my nose in the nape of his next as I took hold of his limp hand in both of mine. My eyes fluttered shut but I didn't fall sleep. Instead I stayed there next to him for hours, cherishing the familiar electricity that danced between our bodies.

At around nine that night I felt a soft squeeze from his hand. Not stopping the wide grin from instantly taking over my lips, I lightly squeezed back. Slowly sitting myself up, I angled myself so that I was facing him, sitting Indian style on top of the blue sheets.

His smile mirrored my own but his eyes remained shut. I leaned down, resting one hand lightly on his chest while the other cupped his cheek as his soft, full lips met mine. His smile only grew more profound in that moment and I felt his free hand come up and tangle itself into my hair, bringing my face even closer. The softness of his tongue, his hot breath in my mouth – things I would never be able to get used to. "Hi you," I whispered shyly, pulling my face back a few inches. When I opened my eyes they were met by his piercing, glorious eyes. If it would have been possible for a person to melt, I would have in that moment.

"Hé là," he replied softly in the accent I loved, planting another kiss on my open lips. "Feel better?"

I grimaced at the subject. "Just great," I answered honestly. "You?"

He chuckled, shaking his head as I bit my lip. "We are quite the pair, aren't we? You know, after this I'm planning on never going to the hospital ever again." I stared down at his hand that I was now holding in both of my own in my lap. "Stop worrying about me, Bee. I'm just fine."

"I can't help it," I whined, pouting. "Reverse the situation, listen to _me_ telling you that, and _then_ you can scold me all you want." I finished with a huff. "But seriously, Edward? Let's be real here. It's me. I'm gonna worry about you the rest of my damn life."

He sighed, his smile faltering. "I really wish you wouldn't."

"Do you worry about me?" I retorted, raising an eyebrow.

"All of the time," he answered without missing a beat.

"_See_?" I argued. "We're both gonna end up constantly worrying about each other all of the time. That's how it is. So, yeah, let's just. . .not to anything that would require the other person to worry, deal?" The conversations we seemed to be having lately rarely consisted of any substance, but that's what I needed. I needed for things to stay light and be simple. I needed it, and so did he.

"Deal," he agreed, chuckling.

I cut off his musical laughter, bringing my face down to his to kiss him once again. I took his soft bottom lip in mine, sucking and biting at it as he did the same with my top. Just as our tongues began to battle, the door flew open. I quickly pulled away, feeling the color of my cheeks turn a rapid shade or scarlet as I bit my lip and stared down at my crossed legs. Carlisle seemed completely at ease with the whole thing, showing no signs of remorse for the interruption.

"God _damn_," Edward growled. "Am I ever going to get any privacy in this fucking room?" Both Carlisle and I flinched at his harsh expletives. "I mean, first I've got Emmett who I'm pretty sure just comes in here and insults me while I'm unconscious. Then I've got Alice who actually brushed my teeth for me one point. _While_ _I was sleeping_. Then Bella comes in here for a spooning session, also while I'm very much not awake." This dull room was taking its toll on him. I sighed. "And then, you seem so content with just appearing at the most _unnecessary_ moments. What is that, Carlisle, like the fifth time you've interrupted Bella and I's _intimacy_?"

I couldn't help myself. Embarrassed or not, I busted out in giggles. He was trying to act all tough and ferocious and scary, but his attempts only came out sounding ridiculously laughable. I saw Carlisle try to stifle it as well but was very unsuccessful. God, I loved that man. Edward groaned loudly, bringing his hand up to cover his face.

"I'll make this quick, son. I can see it's that time." That time? I died again. Edward shot me an accusatory look, narrowing his eyes as my giggles failed to stop. "I just thought I should relay some important information."

"Unless it finally has to do with managing to succeed in _something_, than you can just take your stupid smirk and leave." If he had been able to cross his arms he would have. Instead he settled for a scowl, as his hand bawled tightly in mine.

"Actually," he cleared his throat. "That's exactly what it has to do with."

"What?" All signs of anger or annoyance completely vanished as his eyes grew wide, begging for more information. I too remained silent. Since when had progress ever been made in our case?

"So a certain someone in Chicago had been snooping around an abandoned alley." Edward's eyes immediately shot to mine. "A few men from Charlie's team were able to catch and arrest him. They didn't expect him to be anyone significant, not recognizing faces like Charlie would have. So when they turned him in, guess who that certain someone was?" Words fail to escape my lips as my heart stopped momentarily. "It was no one other than Aro Volturi." A smile slowly tugged at his lips as his eyes shot to Edward's. "I'm sure you're quite familiar with him, aren't you?"

I couldn't believe what he was saying. Apparently, neither could Edward. "What?" Seemed to be the only word he was currently capable of producing.

"According to you," Carlisle continued, clearly enjoying our reactions. "Aro's supposed to be a big deal. Leader. Head of the pack. Right?" He clarified, raising an eyebrow. Edward nodded hesitantly. "Well he's locked up right now. And Charlie's basically got the power to keep him that way for as long as he wants. _So_. Just thought you two might want to know that."

"Are you. . .are you _serious_?"

"No, I was joking." He responded sarcastically. "Boy, you two don't hear a lot of good news that often, do you?" Edward's face was blank. I couldn't read him in the slightest. "Yes, I'm serious. Charlie said he was catching a flight later tonight. He'll be here in a few hours. If you don't believe me, go ahead and ask him."

I hadn't realized my hands were trembling until I felt Edward give them a soft squeeze. Aro was locked up. Aro wasn't able to get us. There was still Marcus and Caius, but Aro. . .like Carlisle said, Aro was the leader. And their leader and finally fallen.

"Well, that's all for now." He guessed correctly in thinking we wanted to be alone. A celebration seemed to be the most appropriate response, given the information he had just shared with us. He stood in the door, turning back to us before he closed it. "I'll send Charlie in as soon as he gets here."

"_Knock_," Edward instructed curtly. Carlisle let out a loud laugh, closing the door behind him as he left.

Then things were silent.

For about a minute.

Before I was attacking his face once again, much more exuberantly and reckless than anything I had been doing before. He never said anything on the subject. He didn't have to. His smile was the only thing I wanted to see, because it was one of the most genuinely accurate, amazing Edward smile's I had ever seen. Because in a way, we had won. There were still many kinks to fix, numerous problems that needed to be taken care of, but none of that mattered in that moment. Because in that moment, it was just Edward. Just his eyes that practically sparkled whenever I would pull away far enough to see his evident smile. It was one of the most spectacular things I had ever seen.

Hours could have passed and I would have never noticed. At one point Al, Em, Jazz, and Rose had came into the room, repeating their surprise and amazement for what Carlisle had told them as well. I never took my eyes off of Edward the whole time. I physically couldn't look away from him.

After so much blasphemy, so much tragedy, there was finally something to truly smile about.

In no way were we out of harm's way, but we were a hell of a lot better than we had been just hours ago. And that fact was enough to have everyone smiling from ear to ear, Edward's being the biggest. I couldn't imagine the thoughts going through his head in that moment and desperately wished I could have heard the utter bliss I knew was there.

I ended up falling asleep curled up at his side that night. For once the nurses left me alone about leaving his room on curfew and let me stay with him. We both woke up early the next morning, both of us more than well-rested. Like Carlisle promised, Charlie entered the room around eight to the innocent sight of simple handle holding. We decided to spare him what Carlisle had been forced to witness repeatedly.

Edward and I weren't the only ones that had something to smile about. The excitement was infectious and Charlie wore an at-ease grin as he sat down next to Edward's bed. I expected him to go into explanation about the occasion that had gone down yesterday, but he never did. Instead, hopeful look crossed his face as he met my anxious gaze directly, and then Edward's.

"I have a plan."

* * *

**CHAPTER SONG: **For Always, Forever - Every Avenue

_"Guess we made it this far, guess we're doing alright. Looks like we've made it out alive. Yeah we made our mistakes, but we followed our hearts."_

* * *

**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_Hé Là -_ "hey there"

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**Reviews make me smile like Edward. (:**


	32. J'étais Libre

**So I won't do the whole huge A/N yet.  
You'll get that for the epi. (:  
Since, technically this isn't the very end of the story.  
But in a way it kinda is.  
But then there's the epilogue. . .Which I'll be posting shortly.  
Oh, shucks. Just read the chapter, alright?  
See ya at the bottom!**

**Follow me on twitter: _simplydazzling**

**OH! And in case you didn't know this yet, I started a new story.**  
**_Miserable At Best_ - and it already has the first 4 chapters posted! Wowza!**  
**Heehee. Check it out? If you haven't yet? (:**  
**I'll die if I never get to hear from you guys ever again.**  
**You rock my freaking socks off, and Edward and I both love you.**  
**So does Bella. Hell, even Aro loves you. Scary huh? But he does.**  
**Because you guys seriously are amazing.**

**I'll shut up now. (:**

* * *

**EPOV**

I winced.

"How does it feel?"

_Ouch_. "Great."

She suddenly threw her arms tightly around me. "_Shit_," I hissed loudly, clenching my teeth together in pain as I winced once again. She quickly pulled back, putting her hands firmly on her hips as she narrowed her eyes at me, clearly unhappy that I hadn't passed her little surveillance.

"See? I knew you were lying." She assessed, shaking her head with a frown.

"Doesn't matter," I rubbed my chest with my hand, trying to stop the source of my pain. "We're on a schedule, Bee. I have to be ready." She opened her mouth to protest but I cut her off. "Besides, the doctors said I was gonna be a little sore for the first few weeks, remember? I'll be fine."

She replaced my own hand with hers, gently rubbing where the bullet had been. "I'm sure Charlie would be okay with you staying here for a few more days. It's not going to matter either wa–"

"Don't be ridiculous," I objected before she could continue on. "I am not staying in this damn place another second." I crinkled my nose, grimacing. "It's been a fucking _month_. And I don't want to mess anything up. No more taking chances. Haven't we figured out by now that something always seems to go wrong when we alter the plans?"

It was her turn to wince this time. "You're right," she admitted grudgingly, sighing. "But seriously, Edward. Please let me know when it really hurts. I can always try and make it better." She got closer, leaning her face forward before softly pressing her lips to where her hand and been. Instead of pulling away, she carefully rested her head there, lightly wrapping her arms around me this time.

I rested my chin on the top of her head. "Mmm," I hummed happily. "I'll have to take you up on that." There were a lot of things I was going to have to take her up on pretty soon. I mean, there wasn't much you could do in the refines of a limited hospital space for a month. Add the additional three weeks we had been apart before that, making it almost two months since Bella and I had been together. I was no uncontrollably hormonal guy, but seriously. If that two month period didn't end soon, becoming one was most likely going to happen.

I guess after today we were gonna have pretty much nothing but time to kill though, so I wasn't too worried. She inclined her head up to mine like she had been able to read my thoughts in perfect clarity. I took her pouty bottom lip in my and sucked lazily on it for a few moments before pulling away.

"You ready?" I asked, giving her a half grin.

She inhaled a deep breath of air, momentarily let her eyes shut, before returning my question with a small nod and a half smile of her own. "I think so."

Everyone was waiting for us in the small lobby as we walked in, along with a few other men who I didn't recognize until I looked past the casual attire. They were more of Charlie's guys, most likely our escorts for the journey, each wearing a professional expression as we entered. I gripped Bella's waist a little tighter, realizing these next couple of minutes were going to be extremely hard on her. She leaned into me, placing her hand on my chest as we finally came to a stop besides Alice and Jazz. They looked excited. They had already gotten past the hard part.

Everyone's eyes fell on Charlie, waiting for him to speak. "Alright guys," he let out a deep breath. "You all know what the plan is."

_"This is going to be weird," Bella shifted next to me on the small couch in my hospital room as the final commercial ended. As the Fox news logo flashed across the screen, she let her head fall onto my shoulder. I gave her an assuring squeeze before planting a kiss on the top of her head._

_"This _is_ going to be weird," I agreed. "But don't you think that by now, weird is normal for us?" She glanced up at me and grinned, shaking her head as she rolled her eyes. The authoritative voice of the blond woman on the TV screen pulled my attention back to what was about to be shown. I braced myself, unsure of how any of this would make either of us feel. It was going to be pretty legit, that was for sure._

_"Here's a story about a young man that will break your heart. . ." It was surreal. I stared in awe, speechless at the images of my own face plastered on the TV along with the faces of my mother, and even Carlisle. ". . .at fifteen, Edward Cullen was forced into doing things as drastic as faking his own death. . ." And just like that, my whole fucked up past was broadcasted to the entire country. They interview Charlie and he talked freely on how this had been one of the most shocking cases they had ever encountered. ". . .kid couldn't ever leave his place. . ." This was an hour-long special, thirty minutes for me, and thirty minutes for Bella. In my thirty minutes, not one detail was left out. They talked about everything right down to Bella and I's living arrangements and how we alternated between the alley shop and the million dollar mansion._

_The whole time, even during the period of the short commercial breaks, Bella never said a word. And neither did I. I mean, what were we suppose to say? We'd lived through it all. The final ten minutes were all about the night I got shot. About the details leading up to it, about Bella being in a different state. Except for with the help of some highly paid actors, a few phony surveillance videos, and even a short video of Carlisle's remorse on the subject, I died tragically that night, as Blondie so kindly put it. Once that was over with a few final words on the lack of information regarding where Marcus and Caius remained hidden, it was Bella's turn. But unlike my story, Bella's was going to be entirely made up, and the consequences that had to follow would be difficult to see._

_She sighed as she ducked her head under my arm, nuzzling her face into my chest as her eyes continued to stay wide open. "Unfortunately, the tragedy does not stop there. . ." The next half hour was covering a re-cap of the events that led up to the suicide of Bella Swan. ". . .After losing her mom, and then her boyfriend, she could no longer take it. . ."_

_Charlie had come up with the story. He informed us that it was an extremely believable scenario that could have gone down had I really not made it that night. To the world, Bella and I no longer existed. No one other than Charlie's team, Em, Jazz, Rose, Alice, and Carlisle knew otherwise. To everyone at school; to them we were dead. To the rest of Bella's family and friends, she had taken her life. Charlie said that if the Volturi were going to believe it, everyone else had to as well. He said this was the only way things could work. It wasn't a problem for me because I had no family left. Bella, however, did._

_The TV showed the news team entering Bella's bedroom that was now covered in yellow warning tape along with a white sheet over the top of a limp figure in the middle of Bella's bed. It showed a gun, and a note she had written before she killed herself. "To respect the privacy of Isabella Swan's short life, Charlie has asked us not to reveal what was written those final minutes. . ."_

_There was another short interview from Charlie who played the part perfectly and believable, they talked to a few kids from school including Jessica, all of them with genuine remorse since they were under that particular impression, and then they interviewed Jake. He wasted no time talking about how he knew what was going all along and that based on the life we had been living, it was bound to happen eventually. When he wrapped up his interview, he finished with a dramatic, "I'll always love you, Bella."_

_All of this scared the shit out of me. Because it was believable. And pretty fucking legit. What if this was actually what had happened? It could have very easily gone down this way and instead of holding her like I was now, we both could have been buried in graves. The thought sent a sudden shudder through my body as the last few minutes of the news special finally came to an end._

_I pushed the power button as it went to commercial. Bella didn't seem to notice. Her eyes were currently closed. What seemed like hours of silence passed between us before I broke it. "Bella?" I whispered tentatively, my lips hovering over her ear._

_Her voice cracked, but she wasn't crying. Although I was sure she probably wanted to. "Yeah?"_

_"The worst part is over," I reminded her quietly. "It can only get better from now on."_

_With a slow, genuine smile spreading across her lips, I covered it with a smile of my own and tangled my hand into her mahogany hair. Her lips vibrated against mine as she hummed in approval and suddenly, whatever we had seen in the last hour was well behind us._

"I've already gone through everything possible that you need to know. What's done is done now," his voice was firm. "There's no going back, even if we do catch them all. Resurrection isn't an option, and you two are going to need to be required to live the rest of your lives under a different name." What he was saying wasn't new. It was just a reminder. I didn't blame him either – this was serious shit.

"Alice, Jasper," he announced with more reminders. "Since they don't have your names, this is just a precaution for you two. Names and faces are easy to put together though, so that's why we don't want to take any risks. In a few years, it will most likely be safe for you both to continue on with your lives here in Chicago."

They both nodded. Since Alice was officially eighteen, she no longer was required to stay in any orphanages. Jasper had explained to his mom that he was leaving for a few years, a new start, earning money for the both of them. She was a smart woman, knowing very well after seeing the news with Bella and I that Jasper needed to do this and that he wasn't able to tell her anything.

I had already apologized to the two of them about a million times – for dragging them into this mess, for causing them to have to drop everything they were doing and leave, for making them have to deal with my consequences. They refused to accept my apology though, both telling me in so many words that they were totally ecstatic for an opportunity at a new start. In retrospect, I suppose looking at it the way they were, I would be excited to. And in a way, I was.

We were doing something very similar to the standard Witness Protection Program. It was different because of how much power and knowledge Charlie held in the security world and the way he could pull as many strings for us as he wanted to. Normally, people submitted into the WPP weren't allowed any past contact references such as family and friends once they were escorted to their new location. Meaning, Bella would never be able to speak to her father again. Although Charlie said it wouldn't be safe for those first few months, being as powerful as he was, he made a promise that checking in with us wouldn't be much of a problem. I was so glad that was the case. Bella really couldn't handle losing another family regardless of the fact she still seemed to have me.

"You guys aren't going to know where you're going until you're there," he continued. "In the last month I've secured a house for the four of you, and transportation. Bella," he glanced at her warily. "Since you weren't able to finish the last couple of months for your senior year, I've set up a course of online classes for you to take. Edward, Alice, and Jasper," He then glanced at the three of us. "There's a community college you guys are enrolled in, but you're not starting it for another year. You all need a year off."

Since none of us knew where we were going, we were all unsure of what the house was going to look like. I wondered if it'd be huge like Bella's in the middle of some remote forest or in the middle of the suburbans with plenty of neighbors. "The house is empty," Charlie explained, answering the question that hung in the air. "I figured Alice and Bella wouldn't want something to do, so you ladies can furnish it however you'd like. Bella," he met his daughter's gaze directly. "In your fake name I set you up with a bank-out. The four of you will have access to it and I will continue to contribute money into it each month." I refrained from gaping. Unbelievable. Here this man was, having more money than fucking _God_, and he was basically telling us that he _wanted_ us to spend millions of dollars? I shook my head in disbelief while Bella shot me a sideways smirk.

I gazed for at Emmett and Rosalie who had remained completely silent this whole time. It was the one thing that fucking sucked about all of this. Being able to even hear from Charlie was going to be a huge stretch we would barely be able to pull off. Emmett and Rosalie; they were a totally different story. We wouldn't be able to contact them. And we _were_ family. Losing family was horrible.

Emmett then smirked at my remorseful facial expression, making me wonder what the hell was going through his complicated mind. Was he _happy_ we were leaving? He didn't seem very torn up at all by the fact that we'd have to say goodbye in a few minutes. Douchebag. Despite my confusion, I still managed to grin back at him.

"As you know," Carlisle spoke up for the first time, his voice sounding confident. "I'm going to stay here in Chicago and help Charlie with resolving all the rest of this."

"Coming out of retirement?" I smirked in approval.

He responded with a smile. "Something like that."

After Charlie finished with some final details about the separate planes we were taking and our different arrival times due to a few misleading detours, it was finally time for goodbyes. Bella and I each approached Emmett and Rosalie. She immediately went to Rosalie and began professing how much she was going to miss her, how she had to keep staying strong. I glanced up at Emmett who was _still _smirking at me. I realized I'd miss this motherfucker more than anyone else. He was the closest thing to a brother I'd ever had, besides Jazz.

"Emmett," I began, causing his smirk to grow so much more profound. I opened my mouth to continue but he cut me off.

"Gonna miss me, Eddie?" He teased, lightly punching at my arm. I winced, muttering some unintelligent under my breath.

"Well yeah, dude." I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. "I mean, I'm never gonna see you again?" The way he continued grinning at me had me so damn confused that I wasn't even sure what _I_ was saying. What the hell?

He quickly darted his eyes over to Bella and realized that her attention was now on the two of us. After shooting a grin at Rosalie, he suddenly slung an arm around my shoulder and caused me to cringe once again. "Surprise!" He practically shouted into my ear. "Guess you won't be missin' me for long, bullet-boy. Rosie and I are movin' in next month."

"Moving in. . .?" I pondered out loud. "Moving in _where_?"

"Dude. You're stupid." He answered simply as his tone dripped in condescension.

Bella apparently caught on much quicker than I did. In my defense, the amnesia was still making me loopy. "With us? You guys are coming too?" She clapped her hands together as she squealed quietly in delight, throwing her arms around Rosalie.

"We decided 'what the hell', you know?" He patted my back with an unnecessary amount of force.

"God damn it, Em, will you fucking cut it out?" I cringed away from his painful hands.

"Sorry, bro," he apologized very unapologetically before continuing on. "I mean, we're family right? We gotta stick together. Besides, that whole 'new start' thing sounds really damn good. Rose and I wanna finally actually complete high school."

I didn't want to sound like his mom, so I didn't say anything. But seriously, I was beyond proud of the two of them for making this decision. For being strong enough to start over. And he was right – families did stick together. I'm not sure how I managed to even think for one second that that wasn't going to be the case anymore. I grinned at him despite the pain in my chest. "God, that's awesome. But what about your mom?"

He elbowed me lightly this time, nudging my shoulder. "Well you've been kinda A-Wall lately so I haven't been able to tell you this," he continued to grin. "But she found a man. And he's amazing too, by the way. I mean, she would want me to do this," he explained fondly. "And at first I felt guilty about leaving her by herself, but Riley's actually really sweet. He'll be able to take care of her better than I could." He was right, I supposed. Besides, Emmett and Rosalie technically weren't entering the WPP, which meant that _technically_, he could come back and visit his mom whenever he wanted. I mean, I'm sure there were some rules and restrictions Charlie had already explained to him, but he would be able to come with us without totally abandoning his mother. And since Rosalie had no family, she wasn't giving up anything.

I noticed Charlie glancing at his watch and realized that we were probably falling off schedule. I quickly whispered that to Bella and she slowly nodded, knowing very well what she had to do. I released her hand as she walked over to Charlie. As much as I wanted to hear what he had to say to her, I knew it was an extremely private moment between the two.

Alice was now voicing her enthusiasm as she bounced up and down in front of Em and Rose. Alice would be excited about the nature of hiding from death. I rolled my eyes before out of the corner of them, noticed Charlie embracing Bella in an incredibly tight hug. They stayed like that for over a minute and when Bella finally pulled away, tears were streaming down her face. "Thanks, Daddy." She mouthed. "I love you so much."

I took a deep breath. Not only did I owe Carlisle my life, but I owed him an immense amount of gratitude for what he had done for all of us. Getting used to the idea of him being my dad always seemed like an impossible task, but I realized that's because I had always been trying to fit him into some kind of stereotype. It didn't matter that he had abandoned me as a baby – he had done it for my safety. It didn't matter that for eighteen years of my life, I had never known him – he had done it for my safety. When you loved someone so much that you knew you had to let them go, that was why in every sense of the word, Carlisle Cullen was my father.

"Before you say anything," He held my gaze as I stood before him, his eyes soft as his expression remained serious. "I just want you to know that you're the strongest person I've ever met, Edward."

I opened my mouth to say something, but the lump in my throat disabled any words from coming out. Before I knew what I was doing, or what I was suppose to say in a moment like this, he pulled me into a tight hug.

"Thanks so much, Carlisle. For everything." I told him, pulling away.

He grinned at me, the heavy stuff behind us. "Kid, stop making it seem like I'm never gonna talk to you again." He pursed his lips together, attempting to look stern as he crossed his arms. I couldn't help but laugh at his attempt. "So I can't not say something responsible," he snapped in response to my chuckling. "Ez wouldn't appreciate me much if I didn't. . ." He paused for a moment before letting everything out in one, exasperated breath. "Be safe, be responsible, use protection, don't do drugs, yada-yada." I nodded, trying not to laugh at the proud expression he wore. "There. Now I can't be blamed for being irresponsible."

Bella cut in in that moment as I said my final goodbye, and I realized that my next one would be a hell of a lot more difficult. Saving my life was the understatement of what Charlie Swan and done for me. No words would ever be able to cover how much I owed him for everything.

As I slowly approached him, he wasted no time in getting to the point. "Don't ever doubt yourself, Edward. You're more capable than you realize." He reached a hand out, placing it on my shoulder as his expression turned serious. "Which is why I trust you with my life to watch out for my baby girl. I'm serious," I'm sure he read the doubt on my face as he narrowed his eyes. "There isn't anyone else I would trust with something like this."

I swallowed hard, clearing my throat. "Charlie, I know I've made a countless amount of mistakes in the past – all of them resulting in absolute disaster, but I _promise_," my voice held a fierceness I never knew possible. "I promise I'm going to do absolutely everything I can to make sure she's safe, happy, and taken care of. I promise."

A grin broke out across his face as he stared at me for a long moment. "That's what I'm counting on." And then, I was pulled into a tight embrace with a man who I owed my entire life too. Which is exactly why I intended on keeping my promise with him. No matter what it would take.

Once the goodbyes were done we gathered around Charlie in a circle once again for the last time. "Edward, your plane is set to arrive first. Alice and Jasper, you two will arrive a few hours after him. Bells, you won't get there until later tonight." He glanced around at the four of us the final time. "This is it. Now each of you go with your assigned escort."

Bella turned to walk away when I quickly grabbed her hand and tugged her towards me. Automatically folding herself into my embrace, I inhaled the sweetness of her hair, planting a kiss there. Before my lips hovered over her ear. "See you soon," I whispered, trailing my lips across her jaw until I found hers.

She grinned against them before pushing back on my chest, rolling her eyes. "I'll see you soon, Edward."

As I was ushered from the room, I heard Em's booming voice from behind me. "See ya in a month, Ed. Don't get shot this time!" I cringed before rolling my eyes and allowing a quiet chuckle to escape my lips.

The plane ride had me a little more than anxious. Not only was I apart from Bella – something that never resulted well in the end, but I also had absolutely no idea where the hell it was we were going to be living. Charlie had explained that it would be better for none of us to know until we actually got there.

Everything was ready. We had actual identification, licenses, new cell phone numbers, the works. I was riding in a standard jet, sitting in Coach next to two giggly blond little girls while Peter, my escort, sat two seats behind me. At first I had wondered why the four of us didn't just fly to our destination in a private jet. But I later realized how ridiculously _un_brilliant of an idea that would have been. I mean, if were being overly cautious for a reason. Even with all the media surrounding our story and deaths, Marcus and Caius were still out there. They could have believed it all, or they could have caught our bluff right from the beginning. Either way, we couldn't make mistakes. By flying in separate planes at separate times, we were being a lot more conspicuous.

The whole name change thing bothered me more than it should have. It felt weird. Which was weird. Because usually, I name-hopped all the time. It was just. . .I don't know. We were Edward and Bella. We weren't Marie Swanson and Anthony Hawkins. I realized I was being stupid. Of course that's who we were to everyone else now. But we would _always_ be Bella and Edward. _Always_.

Alice's new name was Mary Ann, and Jasper's new name was Jason Wilson. They were both thrilled by all the undercover shit – more than they should have been. I couldn't help but be amused by their enthusiasm though. Alice was going all out and dying her pixie hair a strawberry blond, insisting that she needed a new look anyways. Jazz was getting his shaggy hair trimmed. The only thing Bella was getting done with hers was getting some auburn highlights to put into her long mahogany hair. She said if I tried to anything with my hair that she literally was going to eat my balls. And she wasn't referring to a blow job.

Three hours later, the plane finally landed. Peter took care of retrieving my luggage, not that I had much of it to begin with. I could feel the shiny piece of plastic literally burning through my pocket, just waiting to be used. At first I had immediately refused the idea of spending Charlie Swan's money until he insisted that he would be checking to make sure that I did and that the consequences of failing to do so would result in an unexpected slap in the face from karma. Needless to say, my eagerness to shop caused me to relate to Alice more than I ever had.

I had mixed feelings when I found out that I was currently now in Washington. Charlie wouldn't have had us move to some large city like Seattle, would he? I wasn't familiar enough with my geography to know many other places we could have been going. Peter rented a car for wherever it was we were going, explaining that once I was settled, he would fly back to Chicago.

After an hour of driving, Peter spoke up. "We're almost there." He informed me, nodding his head towards a large sign that read _The City of Forks Welcomes You!_ I actually snorted out loud in pure amusement.

"Forks?" I laughed. "Forks. We're living somewhere called _Forks_."

He grinned, obviously finding the situation funny as well. "Spoons wasn't as nice."

I hadn't been paying much attention to the scenery before, but when I really started to take in the abundance of trees and visible wildlife, I wondered if I had ever seen so much green in my life. Everything seemed incredibly fertile too, and Peter was quick to confirm my suspicions. "Better buy a whole closet full of umbrellas. All it does here is rain." I looked for overwhelmingly tall skyscrapers, tried to find the familiar smog that filled the air, but found nothing. Nothing but a refreshing amount of change.

And I was just a little more than content with that.

It unsurprisingly begin to rain, proving Peter's words to hold a great deal of truth as he turned off of the vacant highway onto an unpaved, unmarked road, barely visible among the ferns. The road twisted through the forest encroached on both sides, leaving it only discernible for a few meters. After a few more miles, the woods finally began to thin. It suddenly looked like we were in a small meadow. . .which evidently turned out being the front lawn.

The fortress of tress didn't relent though. There were six or seven primordial cedars shading an entire acre with their vast sweeping branches as the rest of the trees held their protecting shadow right up to the walls of the house that rose among them. The front porch that wrapped around the first story remained obsolete as the branches relentlessly rested their massive shafts of leaves.

For some reason I had been expecting a replica of Bella's house. Definitely not this. Because Bella's house was sad in comparison to what I was now staring at through wide eyes. The house I was staring at now probably dated to over a hundred years old, though it looked to be as if it was recently modernized. It was painted a soft, faded white, standing three stories tall, rectangular and well proportioned. The massive garage that extended to the right side of the house had been a recent addition, able to hold up to four cars and then some. Peter's rental car was the only one in sight for the moment though. There was the faint sound of a river near by, most likely hidden by the obscurity of the surrounding forest.

Bella was going to scream when she saw this house. Her expression was something I immediately began to anticipate as I once again took in the massive structure before me. In my head, I couldn't help but love Charlie impossibly more than I already did.

Peter cleared his throat, bringing me out of my trance. I barely registered the two sets of keys he slid into my hand, a very profound smirk crossing his face as he patted me lightly on the back. "Lucky bastard," I heard him mutter. "The bigger key's for the house. The other one's for your car." _My car_. Before words could escape my mouth, he turned to walk back to his car. "I'll leave you to it, Edward." He responded to my confused expression.

"Thanks so much for everything, Peter." I called as he climbed into his car.

"Good luck, kid." He grinned before closing the door, starting the ignition, and then pealing out.

In a daze, I walked through the deep shade up to the porch. I wanted to share the surprise of exploring our new home with the others when they came, so I decided to wait on the main level for them to come. I opened the door, already expecting a surprising interior as I stepped inside the house. In contrast to the dreary day outside, it was very bright, large, and open. What looked to be several rooms must have became one wide space. The back wall had been entirely replaced with glass, revealing beyond the shade of cedars the back lawn that stretched bare to a wide river – the same river I had been hearing before.

The house was exceptionally empty. At least, from what I had seen of it. I would wait for Bella, Jazz, and Al until taking a tour of the rest of it. There were a few large boxes occupying a small space in the room, basic necessities I was guessing, that most likely would be found in every room of the house.

I occupied myself by unpacking the boxes from the kitchen. We were supplied with silverware, dishes, cooking supplies – things I'm sure Charlie didn't consider being the kind of renovations he referred to when suggesting that the girls furnish the home themselves. The kitchen itself was probably bigger than my entire place in the alley. It was sure as hell worth more. In retrospect, this entire house cost more than just a fortune. But I guess taking into consideration that Bella was the only girl in his life, it'd make sense as to how much he would want to spoil her with. Even though she rarely admitted it, she loved cooking – something she rarely had had the opportunity to do lately. I couldn't imagine the amount of time she'd spend in here. If anyone was going to appreciate the marbled tile floors and the fancy granite top counters, it would be her.

The hours passed by in surprising speed, the sound of a muffled squeal followed by the trilling noise of a doorbell pulling me from my unpacking. "Can you _believe_ this place?" Alice exclaimed enthusiastically, her eyes alight with excitement as Jasper walked in after her, rolling his eyes in unison with me.

"No looking until Bella gets here, Al!" I called loudly. The movement of her feet stopped abruptly before she sauntered back into the room with a disappointed expression marring her petite face. I reached out with a smirk, ruffling her hair. She giggled, slapping my hand away before retreating into Jasper's arms.

"Fine, fine," Her expression quickly lit up once again as she dug her hand into the pocket of her jeans, proudly whipping out a key similar to the one I had received from Peter. "Can I at least see my car?"

I shook my head. "No way, not yet."

Her frown returned, Jasper's matching it. "Come on guys," I sang, mocking Alice's initial enthusiasm. "Let's go finish unpacking the kitchen!" She glared at me before reluctantly allowing a smile to spread across her lips.

Charlie was right – Bella didn't end up arriving until close to ten that night. At the sound of tires meeting gravel, I immediately ran outside. The lights from the inside the house and the car abled me to make out her slender form as she threw herself from the car and hurdled herself at me. Bracing myself for the pain I knew was going to come, I held out my arms a second before she leaped into them. Her lips met mine, easily causing me to forget any discomfort coming from my sore body. "You didn't even look at the house," I chuckled as she pulled her face away, her brown eyes illuminating in the faint light.

"You distracted me," she accused before kissing me feverishly again.

As she straddled my waist, arms wrapped around my neck, I encircled my arms tightly around her waist, hugging her tightly to my body. "Welcome home," I whispered against her forehead before planting a final kiss there. She wiggled in a silent request for me to set her down, beaming at Alice and Jasper as they emerged from the front door.

"It's incredible," she exclaimed in awe as I watched her eyes slowly take in the scene around her. "So much green. . .like your eyes." I rolled my green eyes, slowly snaking my arms around her stomach from behind, resting my chin on her shoulder. "What's the inside like?"

I shrugged, kissing below her earlobe. "Wouldn't know. We've been waiting for you."

As fast as she had flown into them, she flew out, tugging on my hand as she ran up the stairs of the porch and into the house. Alice, finally able to do what she had been dying to for the past few hours, instantly matched Bella's eagerness to explore the house. She took everything in, an overwhelmingly breath-taking smile extending across her lips the whole time. They discussed plans for each room as Jazz and I got towed along. We started with the main level, what would be the living room, the dining room, and whatever the hell else they were talking about.

We went down to the vast, finished basement and both immediately began plans of some huge, over the top entertainment system. When voicing our opinions about investing in some seriously intense gaming equipment, we earned ourselves emphasized eye rolls. "You guys are such _guys_," Alice shook her head, laughing.

We finally made it upstairs. With all the rooms empty, choosing one wouldn't really be a problem. "You two get the master bedroom," Alice declared quietly. Bella, always being her selfless self, opened her mouth to protest before Alice narrowed her eyes, cutting her off. "Don't even start with me, Bee. You two deserve it. If anyone does, it's you two."

I stared into the room they were both referring to, instantly letting my mind wander to places I hoped to be in the near future. Directly in front of me, the back wall consisted of two large windows, one on each side of a pair of French doors in the middle, leading out to a small patio while to the left, two large doors hid what I presumed to be a large walk-in closet. Alice and Jasper left, running off to claim their room as I played with Bella and I's intertwined fingers while she lead me into the empty, spacious room. On the opposite side of the closet was the door belonging to a bathroom. Bella let out a quiet squeal of delight in response to the similarities it showed to the bathroom back in our hotel in Chicago. Everything from the window replacing the wall to the hot-tub sized bubble bath.

The look she gave me as she glanced in my direction told me that her thoughts weren't very far from where mine were. I pulled her to me, ducking my head down to hers as our lips met. Unfortunately, that's as far as we got.

"Edward Anthony," Alice scolded angrily, hands defiantly on her hips as her foot bounced up and down. "You _promised_ me that as soon as Bella came, we got to do cars. And damn, you've got like a million years to do. . ._that_. So seriously. Lez go." And just as quickly as she came, she was gone.

"Cock-blocked," Bella muttered sadly, shaking her head before smirking. "But she _is_ right, you know."

We met them out in the garage. At first, I hadn't understood why the both of them had their mouths hanging to the floor, but then my eyes slowly followed in the direction of the source that was making them so wide. Parked in the garage were four brand-fucking-new, shiny cars. "They have our names!" Alice exclaimed as her eyes only grew wider.

The shiny yellow Buggie, Alice's match-made car from heaven, sure enough had a piece of paper on the hood that read _Alice_. She ran over to the car and began admiring it, falling into a trance of pure adoration as she stared at it with more longing than I had ever seen her looking Jazz. He didn't seem to notice; he was now giving the same attention she was to a black Mercedes. When I glanced back at Bella, I didn't realize why she was smirking at me until I saw what she was smirking _at_.

When I had first taken in the remaining two cars, it was a no-brainer as to who's belonged to who. I mean, obviously the shiny burnt orange corvette belonged to Bella and the monster-sized black Escalade belonged to me. Nope. I was wrong. Hence the smirking. She pretended to take offense to my shocked expression, clutching a hand to her chest as she staggered over to her new toy. "What? I can roll with the big boys."

Unfortunately, I know how the "big boys" think. Watching her lovingly stroke the hood of the shiny black paint was already too big of a turn on. I mean, I couldn't imagine any guy's reaction when she actually drove the damn thing.

After appreciating the house a little more, the rain outside had stopped so we decided to try out the fire pit in the backyard. There had been some insanely nice fold-out chairs in the garage that we brought out, so not having to sit on the damp grass. The temperature was nothing below forty so Bella sat curled up on my lap with a blanket draped over the both of us. Alice and Jazz sat in similar positions as the four of us talked and laughed about nothing consequential – something I hadn't been able to do for years. It was the first time I had felt a hundred percent carefree in years. It was the first time I felt _normal_ in years.

I listened to the soft hum of Bella's voice as her and Alice continued to talk house plans. Eventually, after what seemed like a blissful amount of hours, everyone decided to turn in. Finding beds was tomorrow's first priority because tonight would need to be spent on air mattresses. Not than any of us were complaining. Although, with such a big house, there was absolutely no reason for the two mattresses to be in the same room. . .or level.

I followed Bella inside, retrieving a change of clothes from my suitcase as she did the same. While searching for my gray sweats, my hands found the material of the worn cover belonging to my moleskin notebook I had felt the need to pack. I slowly pulled it out and held it in my hand, staring at it for a long moment before I felt Bella's hand rest softly on my shoulder. I glanced away from it, up at her to find that she had found an old sweatshirt of mine. I was distracted for a moment by the fact that that was the only thing she was wearing. Although the sleeves were way to long and it hung well below her waist, I still found myself licking my lips.

But then the weight of my old journal brought me back to a reality I was done facing. "I have to do something," I muttered, getting up and walking back out of the room. I heard her follow silently behind me as I approached the fading fire once again.

I stared at the dull flames for what seemed like hours. At one point, Bella had wrapped her arm around my waist, ducking her head under my arm and resting it against my chest as her eyes followed where mine were. The grip on my moleskin notebook tightened at the memory of what it contained. The past. All of the shit that I was put through. That I put myself through. So why the hell was I still holding it?

I suddenly threw it into the flames which eagerly began the process of eating away page after page of hell. Bella squeezed me tightly and I returned the gesture. I held her, unwilling to let go as the silence said everything it needed to. Because this was it. This was what we had wanted, what we had fought and risked our lives for. For freedom. And even though it may not have been perfect, or even ideal to most people, the term perfect couldn't have covered the future ahead of us any more accurately. I let my eyes fall shut at the feel of Bella's nose nuzzling the crook of my neck.

"A new start," she whispered, her voice and words like a lullaby as I watched the remains of my past burn away into nothing. Nothing but a clean slate. _A new start_. We didn't need to runaway anymore. The running was done.

Because as the pages went up in flames, consuming them, my allowance of letting my own personal demons consume me burned along with them. I was done running away. I was done with that life.

_J'étais libre_.

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**CHAPTER SONG: **The Great Escape - Boys Like Girls

_"Throw it away, forget yesterday, we'll make the great escape.  
We won't hear a word they say, they don't know us anyway.  
Watch it burn, let it die, 'cause we are finally free tonight."_

* * *

**FRENCH TRANSLATION: **_J'étais libre - _"I was free"

* * *

**This chapter is for every single person who reads this. I could thank you repeatedly for all the support you've shown for this story, for even giving a damn about it and the characters in the first, for always making me smile, but it wouldn't be enough. Not even close.**


	33. Epilogue

**Without further a do, the final chapter of _The Runaways_.**

* * *

**BPOV**

_Two months later_.

I sprinted out through the open back door, diving behind a thick column of trees in hopes of escape. I watched, hidden behind a mask of leaves as he failed to notice where I had gone as he warily looked around the backyard, searching before giving up and stalking back into the house.

I saw a flash of Rose's blond hair through the kitchen window before she disappeared, most likely having been found. When I glanced down at my gun, I noticed that I was out of ammo. "Shit," I cursed under my breath. I glanced around the yard once again, figuring the coast was clear before scaling my back against the side of those and into the garage in hopes of not being caught. It was an extremely risky move, but I needed to re-supply before someone found me. I located the stash of bullets, hastily reloading. As soon as my ammunition was full, I heard footsteps and immediately retreated.

I exited quietly through the back of the garage and out onto the terrace, finding an out of breath Jasper. Jogging over to where he was, I noticed a large grass satin covering half of his shirt. Before I could open my mouth to speak and make sure he hadn't been hit, we were ambushed. "Jasper, to your left!" I cried, diving away from an oncoming bullet as I heard him rapidly firing back.

While Jasper held him off, I ran around to the other side of the house, cringing as I heard the sound of more shots being fired from upstairs. _I swore, if they broke anything_. . .

I stopped momentarily, bending over with my hands on my legs as I panted, catching my breath. My head snapped up and my heart stopped as I heard the sound of ruffling leaves, but I let out a rather long breath of relief when a small rabbit quickly darted away from me. Momentarily distracted by its cuteness, I was reckless in a way that being caught off guard was only what I deserved. You could never lose focus or concentration in a situation like this.

Letting out a loud shriek that echoed through the vast surrounding trees, I attempted to dodge out of the way but was unsuccessful – the bullet hit the exact center of my stomach; a perfect bulls-eye. I dramatically rolled to the ground as a string of profanities escaped my lips.

"_Yes_!" Alice exclaimed enthusiastically, jumping up and down and clapping her hands together before doing several victory fist pumps. I quickly leaped back onto my feet, viciously pumping my fluorescent gun. She darted around the house before any of my bullets could hit her.

You could say we were a little intense with our Nerf gun fights.

Rosalie appeared at my side, scolding me for being an easy target before shaking her head and running off in the opposite direction. She was right. Losing really wasn't an option for me _or_ my team. And I never lost.

Emmett's booming, devilish laugh bounced off the wall of forestry, indicating that Jasper also must have gotten hit. This was rivalry in every sense of the term, and competition was never higher. We were serious about our shit. Rain or shine, this was our Sunday afternoon event. We were so legit that it would have scared off the inventors of the damn things. We had strict rules to follow, boundary lines, territorial safeties, and even mandatory team outfits.

The teams were always Jasper, Rosalie, and I. And Emmett, Alice, and Edward. Since it was unallowable for couples to be on the same team, Rose and I had come up with the strategy of distraction. Distraction as in painted on, very shiny, flexible black leather pants, and a matching long-sleeve shirt, exposing a majority of our abs. Anything to slow down Em and Edward. And trust me – it definitely worked. Alice being on the other team, she had her own methods of strategy, making it equally difficult for Jasper to run.

Like I said, we liked to win.

Speaking of winning, if I didn't get some more kills soon, we weren't going to.

I crept into the house. Another rule we had – all lights needed to stay off. Since Forks was known for its cloudy, dreary, _ridiculously rainy_ weather, all the rooms were eerily dark, only lit by the gloomy sky outside. I stopped in the middle of the living room, listening to to the sound of my own breathing and the occasional yelling outside.

Suddenly, a pair of strong arms tackled me onto the couch, cutting off my startled scream with his lips as I heard the loud sound of both our plastic guns dropping to the floor. He hovered over me, his lips urgently sucking on mine as his hands recklessly roamed over the black leather. I wrapped my legs tightly around his waist, arching my body into his as his hot breath trailed across my bare neck. My fists tugged at his hair and his husky responsive groan put my body into overdrive.

I was too far gone to notice the lights had turned on. However, I did notice when Edward was pried off of me. "Ten points deduction!" Emmett declared, narrowing his eyes at me as I straightened myself up. Edward, eyes hooded, had an extremely smug look on his face as he watched Emmett began the castration process. Because obviously _I_ was the one to blame here.

"What?" I protested, glaring at the both of them. "Why?"

Emmett crossed his arms, shaking his head at my apparent obliviousness. "Fraternizing with the enemy."

I stood up, satisfied by the way Edward's eyes hungrily raked over my body now that he could see me. "Your teammate attacked me – not my problem." I accused impassively, glancing at my fingernails. "Call it harassment, if you will." My eyes shot to Edward's, who was now staring at my legs, completely out of the conversation.

"Ow!" He complained as Emmett's hand struck the back of his head. "What, dude? Have you seen Rosalie?"

Emmett glared at him with a passionate amount of hatred, slowly shaking his head. "No _shit_. That's the point, pervert. A _distraction_." He grabbed onto Edward's arm, preparing to retreat. "And congratulations," he snapped at Edward. "You successfully allowed it to work. _Again_."

I shot Edward a sweet smile, looking up at him through my eyelashes and everything. It was only a matter of seconds now. . .

He suddenly broke free of Emmett's grasp, ran to my side, and picked me up bridal style in his arms. His lips eagerly met mine once again before pulling back. "I forfeit," he declared with a triumphant smile. By this point, the three others had joined us in the living room. Emmett gaped at him momentarily before a murderous look crossed his face. The rules were more than clear – without all three players, you automatically lost.

Jasper was allowed an enthusiastic fist pump while Rosalie gave me a very approving nod, looking as smug as could be. "Well done, hoe." I grinned in response as Edward's lips feverishly attempted to attack my face once more.

"Dude, _come on_!" Emmett whined, throwing his hands in the air in exasperation. "That's three fucking times now! What the hell?" He narrowed his eyes, his chest heaving in irritation. "_One time_. It would be nice to win _one fucking time_, Edward. Holy _shit_!" Emmett continued to rant, Edward continued not to listen, and I continued to be victorious. He let out another string of expletives. "You're a prick, did you know that? A grade-A asshole. That's their goddamn strategy, you motherfucker – it's how they win _every goddamn time_." Jasper and Rosalie's smiles only grew wider in amusement as Alice silently fumed next to him.

This was the one time Emmett ever really got worked up. But he _really_ got worked up. Like last time, we had to go buy a new flat screen. I shivered as Edward's lips now trailed down my neck, giggling at the tickling sensation his hot breath was creating. "Not my fault," I defended myself, shrugging at him. He opened his mouth to speak, to continue his angry objections, but I cut him off, holding up a hand indicating silence. "I don't wanna buy another TV."

Edward, finally noticing the magnitude of Emmett's rage, fled the room with me still in his arms. And since I knew my final comment had literally pushed him over the edge, I waited for the loud crash. Three, two, one. . ._crash!_ I rolled my eyes, Edward cutting off my laughter with his lips before closing the door to our bedroom behind us and throwing me on the bed.

_One month later_.

I sat in front of my large vanity, curling my hair. A sense of nostalgia swept over me as I stared for a long moment at my reflection. Had I not known any better, I would have thought I was back in my home in Chicago, getting ready for any other day.

I would be lying if I didn't admit to missing Charlie beyond sanity. We hadn't been able to make contact yet – his rules – and wouldn't be able to for another month or two. Before we had moved to Forks, he had explained that it would be too risky to try any form of communication when Marcus and Caius could still have been out looking. Hell, for all I know, he could have already caught the fuckers by now. I sighed, shaking my head. Everything about this place was perfect, except for the obvious absence of my parents.

Some days it was harder than others, but I always reminded myself that they both would want me to be happy. Even with Charlie, a thousand miles away, and with Renee, up in the sky, I knew dwelling on the fact that they could no longer really be in my life wasn't something they would want me to do.

Besides, who know? Maybe some day I'd be able to see Charlie again in person. Wasn't it was safe again. I would never give up hope until the day I died because I refused to believe such a tragedy was possible. Not after all we had over come. I would see Charlie again – not just by a video message, or via phone conversations. One day I'd be able to wrap my arms around the man who raised me and be able to thank him for what a good job of it he had done.

Applying one last touch of mascara to my eyelashes, I exited the room and climbed down both flights of stairs to retrieve Edward. It was our first day at Fork's High today, Charlie insisting on the repeat of senior year for me due to my absence for a good chunk of the second half last year. Even though his would technically be Edward's third time as a senior, he claimed he didn't mind and that it wasn't like he couldn't have fun third time's the charm.

But seriously? His twentieth was in a month and I was turning nineteen in a couple of weeks. Was it really that believable that we could pass as high school students _again_? I don't really think we had as much of a problem as Emmett did. Emmett would be turning twenty-_one_ soon and he sure as hell couldn't pass as eighteen even if he wore a damn toddlers outfit. Rose was a different story as well, but the two of them were just excited to finally be getting back on the right track. Since we wanted to remain somewhat conspicuous though, they weren't starting until next month.

"Yeah, motherfucker, in your fucking _face_. I just got a kill-tacular, bitch." Edward's voice bounced off the walls as I descended down into the boy's space. I rolled my eyes at his intensity and watched in amusement as Emmett, who was apparently currently losing, chucked a pillow at his smug face.

I plopped down between Emmett and Edward on the large wrap around leather couch. Edward didn't so much as acknowledge me while his fingers rapidly flew over the buttons. I waved a hand in front of his distracted face, "You ready? We gotta get going."

I narrowed my eyes when he refused to give any incentive that he had even heard me at all. I mean, I knew it would happen eventually. That competition was inevitable. But shit, I never thought I'd lose to a motherfucking play station.

I punched his arm, getting his attention. "Ow, fuck!" He cursed, cringing away. Eyes glued to the wall-sized TV, mesmerized by the game, he continued to remain positioned right where he was. "Fine. Chill, Bee. Just lemme win and I'll be there in a sec, okay?"

I actually growled. I knew the damn entertainment system was a bad idea from the start. In frustration, I grabbed for the stupid controller in his hand, pried it out of his fingers at his reluctance to give it up, and promptly won the game for him in the matter of ten seconds. All three boys stared at me with wide eyes and open mouths as I flipped my hair over my shoulder. "There. Done. Now let's go." I got off the couch, Edward following right after me as I walked back up the stairs.

"You're a girl. You're not supposed to be that good at video games."

I shrugged, "I'm not a girl."

"Ha ha," he rolled his eye incredulously as I handed him a large umbrella. He was the guy – he carried the umbrella. We had established this rule the very first week of moving to this godforsaken, rainy town. As I slid on my 'Fuck Me' Ugg boots, I watched in satisfaction as Edward's eyes raked over my body. "You can wipe that smirk off your face, Bee. Doesn't matter how hot you are, I'm still gonna bury you, babes."

"I'm sure." I twirled around, just for the effect, showing off my winning outfit. Edward and I had established a bet – who could get the most phone numbers the first week. I had teased and curled my long, mahogany hair, blackened my eyes by means of a smokey effect, and my outfit screamed sex-kitten. I had received Rose's approval and she of all people would know sex appeal. I wore tight black leggings in response to my fuzzy gray slipper-boots, and a sleeveless, strapless blue baby doll that flowed the length to just cover my ass. The expensive Victoria Secret's push-up bra was doing a world of justice to my cleavage, and the shiny necklace only enhanced attention to be looking there as well.

I didn't even care that I felt like a dirty stripper, I was not about to lose to him. Lately, Edward and I had been having a lot of crazy competitions. Like who could last the longest holding out on an oral, car races down the barren country roads just outside town, beer pong, and even things as insane as cliff diving. Pointless, reckless things. Just being _teenagers_. Even though I liked to think I won most of the time, I had to give it to him – if anyone was going to beat me at anything, it would be Edward.

He may have had his attractively low slung dark blue jeans, his tight-fitting black band T-shirt that illustrated his delectable muscles, and "hi-I-just-got-done-having-hours-and-hours-of-fucking-amazing-sex" hair, but I refused to give in to defeat that easily. The only question was, who would be easier to break? The population of Forks' high school girls, or the population of Forks' high school guys? Both of us were the jealous type – the _extremely_ jealous type – so this would be fun by means of tormenting the other. I, personally, loved the idea of strutting around right before his eyes, flirting up other guys as I made sure he had a great view. But you know, then I had to deal with him doing the same thing.

It was all for fun though. We were way too in love to even start and second guess each other. Which was exactly why things like this could be fun.

We drove separately to keep up appearances. He drove his little speed car and I drove my intimidatingly intense SUV. I won the race to the parking lot, cutting him off at the last second as I recklessly took the first available spot away from him.

I danced up the stairs of the front building, already earning the attention of several younger underclassmen guys. Edward had caught up to me, only a few feet behind me, as I turned back to wink at him. He ignored the overwhelming amount of affectionate looks his tall, attractive frame earned as he followed after me, eyes only on me. This would be _way_ too easy.

When he caught up, he constricted an arm around my waist, spinning me around before pressing me up against the wall and firmly pressing his lips against mine. "_Mine_," he growled before stepping back.

Yeah, that's right. Take that play station.

_Three months later_.

Edward hugged me tightly against his chest, rocking me back and forth in means of calming me down. Silent, panic tears streamed down my face as my mouthed opened up to release another string of profanity-filled, flustered, frustrated concerns.

"Shh, Bee. It's okay, calm down. Shh." I know he was trying to 'be the man' and come off as tough, but his total lack of relating concern was seriously freaking me out. I knew him well enough to know that the shock probably hadn't hit him yet, and in his mind, he was probably still in denial. "Maybe it was defective?" I felt him shrug. Yep. Definitely denial.

I bursted into another round of fresh tears. "No it wasn't defective!" I cried, narrowing my eyes at the way he cringed as my voice cracked with hysteria. "I took _three fucking tests_, Edward. _Three_!"

That certainly got his attention. His eyes widened as he furrowed his eyebrows. Ah, there was the worry. "You took three?" He asked incredulously. I bit my lip and nodded in clarification. He was silent for a moment before he scrunched his nose. "Three?" He asked in a tiny voice.

"Don't make me say it again," I growled, unable to reign in my unstable roller coaster of emotions. See? The first indication. Wasn't the second an excessive amount of morning sickness? Well it sure felt like the contents of my stomach would be released any moment, I guess. I started crying again, burying my face in his neck. "Oh, Edward. What are we going to do? I'm still a teenager! I'm in high school! Oh, if Charlie ever found out. . ." I trailed off, my voice doing that weird cracking thing once again.

Edward grimaced. "I don't want a kid." He expressed honestly. "I mean, not for a long, _long_ time. For fuck's sake, I'm not even married to you yet, Bee! And I don't really wanna rush into anything like that just yet because we've _finally_ settled in. I mean, I can't handle anymore goddamn stress and a baby sure as hell's gonna make our lives difficult."

"I don't understand," I mused, shaking my head. "I'm on the pill. I haven't gone _off_ the pill." I looked at him, matching his grimace. "I mean, shit. We're more than _active,_" I gritted through my teeth. "So why all of a sudden am I pregnant?"

As he flexed his arms around me, I could see the panic slowly start to set into his features. Finally. "Everything's going to change. I mean, it's bad enough we're not even registered under our real names anymore, but now the kid's gonna have to have _my_ last _fake_ name." He let out a exasperated moan. "I like not having responsibilities! Fuck, these last few months have been the only time I've actually been able to _live_. And _fuck_. I can just kiss that goodbye." He was right, and after all we had been through, having a child was the last thing Edward needed to add to his list of experiences just yet.

My tears only increased as I shook my head repeatedly into his chest, trying to wake up from a bad dream I never asked for. "I mean, it's not like I don't want you to have my baby, Bella. But due to the fucked situation we've been left with because of my past, the idea of kids is seriously disturbing."

"I'm going to be a horrible mom," I widened my eyes, "I don't want a baby!"

Just then, Emmett appeared in the doorway, grinning wider than I had ever seen him. I shot him a murderous look. "Get _out_," I hissed menacingly. My life was falling apart – again – and the last thing I wanted was for Emmett to be a witness. But yet he just stood there, ignoring my glare. "Emmett McCarty, I said get the _fuck _out."

His eyes widened, and if I wouldn't have known him any better, they looked amused. No, they _were_ amused. He slowly entered the room, grin only growing bigger. "What's a matter, Bee?" He asked, sickeningly sweet. "You seem a little. . .hormonal. Is everything alright?"

I stared at him incredulously for a moment, suddenly suspicious of his way too happy face. Why did he seem so proud of himself? "Emmett." I spat. "Why don't _you_ answer that question for me."

Rosalie then appeared at the doorway as well. Her face was looking smug as she crossed her arms over her chest. "Told you she would be the most dramatic." I watched as her eyes appraised me and then Edward. "Granted, he was pretty close to peeing himself, she still has the waterworks going for her. So I win."

Without any incentive on what I was doing, I sprang out of Edward's arms, off the bed, and lunged at Emmett. I leaped at him, jumping on his back in attempts to bring him to the ground. "Emmett," I yelled breathlessly between punches I threw at him, "what," I pulled at his hair, "did you," I strangled his neck, "DO?"

I eventually managed to tackle him to the floor – quite an accomplishment, I'd say – when Jasper entered the room. He glanced at me and Emmett, to Rose's grimace, to Edward's confused expression, and back to us before he tossed his head back in uncontrollable laughter. "Yes! Hah, Rosalie, I _told_ you." He grinned victoriously, "Told ya she'd get him to the ground. Hells Bells is a strong one."

_What the hell were they talking about?_

Edward must have realized what was going on before I did because suddenly, his face broke out into a wide smile. I stared at him as he stared at me before a round of hysterical laughter escaped his mouth. I got off Emmett, adjusted my clothing, and stood in the middle of the room, placing my hands on my hips as I shot each one of them a murderous look. There was only one person who wasn't hear at the moment.

"Alice!" I hollered. Like on cue; like she had been just _waiting_ for me to call her name, she appeared in the room no more than five seconds later.

She went straight to Jasper, giving him a smug look matching the one Rosalie had given Emmett. "Knew she'd yell for me, Jazzy. That'd technically mean I won, wouldn't it?"

"Alice." I gritted her name through my teeth this time. "Please, would you enlighten me?"

She was still grinning as she took my hand and led me over to sit down on the bed. Edward tried pulling me into a hug but I pushed him away. He was still laughing. "Okay, Bee. And Edward. You two have been up to nothing but trouble since we moved here, so consider this payback for all those times. Like when you convinced Emmett someone stole his precious car and had him on a wild goose chase for a whole week looking for the culprit. Or when you convinced that one Ben kid from school that Rosalie wanted to marry him. Or how about when you colored Sharpie on Jazz's face when he was sleeping and it took him a week to defile what you two wrote." Her face suddenly grew menacingly dark. "Or when you went the measures to convince me that Macy's had closed."

Okay, so I guess neither Edward or I could come to our own defense about anything she was accusing us of. Because, well, we were guilty of all of it. With a limited amount of things to do in this small down (other than the obvious), the two of us had become partners in crime. And damn good ones, at that.

"So what exactly, are you saying. . ." I hedged, biting my lip as I glanced at Edward who was smirking, no doubt proud of the list of achievements Alice had just revisited.

"I'm saying that I planted the idea in your head that you should take a pregnancy test just to be on the safe side, Emmett went out and bought three fake tests that showed you were expecting, Jasper was the one who got us all to bet on your reactions, and Rose is the master mind though."

I turned my glare to Rose who simply shrugged at me. "Payback is a bitch."

As I slowly looked at each of their faces, it was my turn to burst out laughing at the utterly ridiculous situation. Because I wasn't pregnant, and I loved these guys more than life itself.

_A year later_.

It was late January. Edward and I were in the kitchen, and I was trying to teach him how to cook. No one had lost any fingers yet, so I considered it progress. Edward, however, did not. I think he was seriously considering punching me in the face several times when I had to explain to him that the amount of flower added _does_ matter, and if you're cracking your eggs, it has to be a certain way.

Every time he'd get frustrated, I'd grant him a short kissing session. . .well, kissing was putting it lightly. But anyways. The real miracle, I think, was that both of us managed to keep all of our clothes on.

"Okay now put your hands over mine," I instructed him, standing in front of the chopping bored. We were making chicken dumpling soup and I was teaching him how to chop vegetables. He obliged, moving to stand very closely behind me, his hot breath in my ear as placed his hand over the top of mine. My knees grew week but that was only natural due to our close proximity. I knew exactly what he was doing, and as much as I may have enjoyed it, he needed to cut the hell out. Literally.

In one swift motion I spun around, pushing him backwards before grabbing the knife and pointing it at him. "I am sure as hell not playing cook around here every damn night anymore." He smirked as I narrowed my eyes at him. "You need to learn this. Now everyone else got the same lesson–"

He snorted. "The same _lesson_? Oh what I would have paid to see you and Rosalie's."

I emphasized the knife in my hand, taking a step towards him. "So _not _funny."

Just then the doorbell rang, interrupting any further death threats. "I'll get it!" He quickly volunteered, about to dart around me when I stopped him.

"You'll get better at cooking is what you'll get." I corrected pointedly. Carefully handed him the knife, I sent him a threatening look. "Those better all be cut like they're supposed to by the time I get back."

He gave me a sharp nod. "Yes, ma'am."

I rolled my eyes as I hurried to get the door. Edward and I were the only ones home at the moment so before our interruption, the house had been substantially quiet. Swinging it open, I was met by a man in a blue postal uniform on the other side. He sent me an overly happy grin as his eyes wandered down my body. _Oh, shit_. I was wearing. . .not much. A neon green sports bra and a pair of black spandex. And to top it all off, due to Edward and I's recent _activities _plus the cold air from outside, I was nipping out. I uncomfortably crossed my arms over my chest as his eyes slowly moved back to mine. He finally cleared his throat to speak but was cut off.

I felt a pair of arms from behind wrap themselves around me. Edward spun me so that I was facing his chest, his protective embrace shielding me from the pervert mailman. "Can I help you?" The protection and defense in his tone did funny things to my body. I turned my head so that I could see the guy at the door.

"Uh, yeah. Is their a Marie Swanson who lives here?" He countered Edward's question in an equally irritable tone.

"That's me," I answered from the confines of his arms.

He gave me another hungry look and I grimaced in disgust. "Excellent," he responded. "If I could please have you sign this then. . ." he trailed off, suspending his arm towards me with a clipboard in his hand.

I awkwardly attempted to spin around in Edward's arms, but his tight grip refused to let me. "I'll sign it," he narrowed his eyes, reaching for the clipboard.

The mailman responded by narrowing _his_ eyes and pulling back the clipboard before Edward could take it. "Sorry, kid." Anger flashed in Edward's eyes at the term 'kid.' "I'm afraid that's against our policy. Your little lady friend is gonna have to do it or she can't have the package."

I watched the exchange between the two in amusement as Edward's eyes fell shut and he pinched the bridge of his nose. "_Fine_." His arms then released me, and I stepped forward to take the clipboard from him just as another gust of freezing air blew in. Shit, shit, _shit_. Feeling his eyes on my very 'excited' chest, I signed my fake name in irritation before shoving it back in his face. He was smirking at Edward who, in return, was giving him one of the most murderous looks I had ever seen.

The mailman's pleased gaze returned to mine as once again, I folded my arms across my chest. I sighed in frustration when I was required to unfold them and retrieve the package from his hands. "One more thing, Miss," he quickly added before shutting the door. "I am required to ask this," he paused, Edward quickly coming up behind me and pulling me to his chest once again before this vile man had a chance to look at mine anymore. "Are they real?"

The door shook, threatening to come off its hinges in response to the amount of force Edward had put into slamming the door. "Jesus Christ," I heard him mutter to himself as he shook his head. I set the package down on the coffee table before Edward's hands were firmly gripping my chest. I moaned when he slid his thumbs below the fabric and swept down my fully erect nipples. "_Mine_," he growled. "These are _mine_, Bee."

I pulled his face down to mine, about to jump up and straddle his waist when I remembered about the package. He growled when I pulled away, and I swatted his hand when he attempted to bring me back to him.

I retrieved the package, sitting down on the couch as he sat down next to me. It was a small package, no bigger than a shoe box. I pursed my lips in curiosity when I noticed their wasn't a return address. I carefully opened it as Edward's arm wrapped loosely around my shoulder. Attached to a small jewelry box, I read the letter before I checked the contents. Tears immediately began blurring my vision as I read the first line.

_Dear Bella,  
__  
I've been looking for this for ages and I finally found it.  
Your mother always talked about how someday she wanted you to have it.  
Stay strong, Bells, because I know you can. You're tough and you'll always be my little girl.  
And since I know Edward's reading over you're shoulder right now, thank you for taking care of my girl. I know she's safe with you.  
Aro remains in prison as we speak, a place he'll be for the rest of his life. Marcus and Caius haven't been found yet, but I swear, we are doing everything we can to find them. Don't worry about them though. They won't find you; they won't touch you.  
And someday you'll be safe and I'll be able to tell you this to your face instead of a letter.  
Hopefully soon the telephone will be an option – hearing your voice will be always be one of my greatest joys. I promise, sweetie, we _will_ see each other again someday. I promise.  
But you have to promise me something in return.  
Stay strong like you have been. Please stay strong. For everyone. For me, for your mother, for Edward. You can do this. I know you can. I love you so much, Bella._

_Counting down the days until I hear your beautiful voice,  
Charlie_

Silent tears fell relentlessly down my cheeks as I set the letter down. Because he was right, and someday, we'd see each other again. Someday soon. I felt Edward's arm tighten around me as I carefully opened the small, dark blue velvet jewelry box. Nestled inside the white padding lay my mother's diamond necklace.

The necklace my dad gave her when he first told her he loved her. It was a simple silver chain with a single charm. A diamond heart. As I fingered the beautiful necklace, I noticed a small folded note fall from the box. The tears continued to come as I reached for it, unfolding it.

_We'll always be with you_.

Edward wordlessly removed the necklace from my limp fingers. He brushed my cascading hair from my neck and with a gentle, feather touch, put the necklace on me. As I wore Renee's necklace, I _felt _her with me. Her diamond heart rested just to the right of my heart, and as it lay cold against my bare skin, I could feel her with me.

My eyes fell shut as I steadied my breathing. _Stay strong_. Charlie had told me to stay strong. I turned to Edward, silently crawling onto his lap as he obliged to my silent request and wrapped his arms gently around me. I would stay strong. As he held me in his arms, I no longer cried. I just allowed him to rock me, loving me like it was the only thing he ever wanted to do. Maybe it was.

"Stay strong," he whispered in my ear, echoing Charlie's request.

I would.

I pulled back, opening my eyes once again as my fingers instinctively found their way to the tiny pendant. I would stay strong. I would live for Renee. For Charlie. For Edward. For Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie.

I would live for myself.

* * *

**The immensity of the love I have for all of you is immeasurable.  
Thank you so much for your love and support.  
This story would have never got written without it.  
So I thank you. From the sincerity of the bottom of my heart.**


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